06x24 - Jethro Proposes

[bunniefuu]

come and listen to him a story about a

man named Jed for a mountaineer barely

kept his family fed and then one day he

was sh**ting at some food and up to the

ground come a bubble and crude oil that

is black gold Texas Tea well the first

thing you know old Jeb's a millionaire

the Kim folks said Jed move away from

there said California is a place you

ought to be sold and loaded up the truck

in the mood to Beverly Hills that is

swimming pools movie stars a Beverly

hillbilly

[Music]

thank you

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okay everybody

my pop-over's coming up we have hung

enough to eat anything eat the bellies

cook

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this is dandy Papa where's Ellie

yeah smell good too well I'm proud of

them myself well y'all just eat up first

I'll show you the dress I might

oh you learned her how to sew granny

taught him everything I know then turned

her loose she'll be a Mrs for you you

know it well if what she sowed looks as

good as these popovers and don't touch

it Uncle Jed I said I was hungry enough

to eat almost anything but this

popover's alive

[Music]

I'm afraid

thanks everybody I think you saved my

life yeah seems like after all these

years are you attacking your food it's

finally getting back at you

can see the headline thistle's Revenge

by pop over well no use letting it all

go to waste can't taste as bad as it

looks thanks

wrong tastes worse never gonna get

herself a fellow using bait like this

man don't live by bread alone feed some

areas you don't live period Well if she

ever does get herself a husband I know

what to give him for a wedding

gee whiz what's with you

you're the one that's always calling her

an old maid granny

every time Ellie has a birthday you

dress up in a black dress and go in the

morning

I found someone who needs my health in

the romance Department worse than else

quit looking at me

it ain't you it's Miss Jane you know

that I heard that that poor girl ain't

never had a man ask for her hand in

marriage well quit looking at me

I did I don't want you to take her out

or call on her or Carter it's a good

thing all you have to do is propose to

it oh well when you put it that way it's

hard to refuse good but I'm gonna

oh yes Amber woman has the right to say

she's been proposed to once in a

lifetime

granny I'm sure it's a worthy cause but

it ain't worthy enough to get married

she won't accept that doesn't matter the

important thing is that she would have

been asked

you do the asking

it has to be you somebody that she

respect and Slick handsome smart good

manners hey are you calling me Grady

huh I always say we can't find a horse

grab a mule are you calling me a mule

a jewel a jeweler thanks granny

well I'm going in the kitchen even

though his popovers ain't as bad as not

eating at all

you don't want to put one of them

vicious bombings into your lizard I

don't oh wouldn't you rather tickle your

taster with bacon and Buzzard eggs and

eggplant aspect squirrel and parsley pie

some corn beaver and cabbage let me stop

you know that's all my favorite I'll

pick them all for you if you just do me

one little favor a little favor heck for

that I'll prune every tree and Bush on

all 14 acres of this place with my teeth

you don't have to work that hard

you darling sweet boy oh granny yeah

I don't know Jay may decide it was

better never having been asked

[Music]

me

I'd like you to meet Joseph a new

employee I just hired how do you do oh

ilsa doesn't speak or understand English

why did you hire her

stupid question what else is replacing

whimper our bank card there's the stupid

answer let's show her around this other

way

chief

you think the Crook's gonna care about

robbing us

meet Jane

out of a day

this is for you

thank you

I'm afraid I got a little hungry on the

way down I saved the Maple and the

licorice went for you I don't like them

well thank you all right are those for

me too oh yeah uh roses is red violets

is blue sugar is sweet

come on gone I keep forgetting the last

part so are you

so am I what

oh oh I I forgot about Elsa Elsa meet

Jethro at

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General huh oh how do you miss uh

yes hey that's a beautiful name

Jennifer what was it you wanted oh I

come to invite you out for dinner but

there's something I gotta ask you

all right what was it you wanted to ask

me

I forgot but I'll Remember by tonight

I forgot that too I'll call you bye Elsa

[Music]

I suppose you're wondering why I

accepted a dinner invitation with that

simple bubonic you

it is not his uncle 73 million dollars

but rather his periable ineptitude of

women I could not bear to see him

rejected once again

and two I haven't had a date myself for

six months

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Miss Jane going out with you Granny I'm

in love

what you do give you something to eat

wonderful perfect beautifulest girl in

the whole world

Miss Jane

she did give you something to eat granny

I'm talking about me Elsa the girl I'm

gonna ask to be my wife Miss Jane gets

to turn you down first yeah proposed to

Miss Jane I am really in love

how about our deal all them vittles I'm

cooking for you Randy you just don't

understand this time it's the real thing

why me else is my whole life

I adore I am crazy Mad in love with her

granny I'd do anything for her yes bro

put your nose to the breeze

it's not parsnip and squirrel Pike

tell me all about that girl that you're

crazy Mad in love with

what girl

[Music]

you don't scare me like that Uncle Jim

made me laugh my hand off into this pan

of gravy I would be one way to make it

finger looking good

you're joking ain't you it's groundhog

gravy we having a party nope all this is

what Granny's giving me for food

full of soup

t*rture me Ain't Nothing Gonna Make me

tell my secret I wouldn't even try and

you can quit that please when I got a

secret I keep it boy time it to the rack

put burning bamboo right underneath our

fingernails drag me behind Wild Horses

what'd you say I said you keep your

secret somebody will tell me for long oh

no they will Ellie couldn't granny

wouldn't and Miss Jane don't even know

that I'm one of the proposed to her yet

so that only leaves me and I am just a

little bit too small

that is a dirty trick off your kid

there's no dirty here in the trick

you're playing on Miss Gene you might

say yes and get stuck with you no she

won't and I'll tell you why you see Miss

Jane is what you call a intellectual

real educated and full of fancy manners

and high tone wigs

huh well she ain't gonna marry no

chuckle-headed Yokel with the manners of

Billy Goat it's got the root sticking

out of him like Wheels on the porcupine

yeah I see what you mean

sure so all I got to do is pretend that

I'm

for a while

of course uh I got to forget that I'm a

sophisticated International Playboy and

find out how a country here who would

propose to again that's true would you

give me some pointers

what can I tell a fellas got your way

with words q can help me be a hasty you

see this Beverly Hills sophistication

has done rubbed off on me but thank

goodness you're still just as rough as a

cob

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[Laughter]

hold it bring her a double help in Ally

carts if she wants me I'm having fake

call Clippers we have no picked hug lips

all right then deep fry them and plus

some fat

Jethro they don't have any here

what about beavertail awesome Shanks go

gizzards blizzard eggs

and you ain't got no hoglers no hug

lizards you said this was a hot class

restaurant

oh that's what jethroat is uh as a

matter of fact they have excellent

powdered defogra that's goose livers

goose livers yeah how come people eat

such things

we'll be ordering later and uh forget

about the fog lovers I wish I could but

here's the second path tonight that's

all of them

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I

look like the average Beverly Hills

couple

D Jethro supposed to miss Chang yet come

on

there's nothing wrong

yeah it seems I was supposed to ask you

something tonight but I've been so

hungry I can't remember what it was

I should have never give this job to Old

super cup

the machine

has your conscience ever talked to you

of course many times well what's it like

oh a little voice in your head talking

to you well does it by any chance sound

like granny oh no dear boy good I

thought I was hearing things that's

never happened to me before knock on

wood

row

come on here goes that voice again

and hear nothing restraine no lean back

and relax you're probably imagining it

damn I got off a strong imagination

strong imagination man it's the first

time I ever had a kick to it that came

from the next boom

hey excuse me mister

well howdy there beautiful

Ellie

growling

oh just somebody admiring my die but

they reminded me what I wanted to ask

you and what does that do boy

this game will you marry me

sweet innocent death row

how can I refuse that plate of face how

could I say no oh there's any number

ways no Knicks never absolutely not or

just shake your head no so used to being

rebuffed turned away scold but not for

me

but once you shall hear what your heart

has been longing to hear

yes yeah I've been rejected for the last

time I shall make the sacrifice my

answer is yes yes yes no no no

yeah why do people find out about

dinner you can wait if you want to by

stand up I don't want to be across the

state line

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all right

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if you've seen how pathetic he looks you

you'd have said yes too oh well it's

gone now now let's see you want some

place that's really nice for your bridal

shower how about here at the bank in the

fall

I'm all right we'll go out someplace

the parking lot

I I want to do it all I ask is that you

give me any duplicate gift

for some mistake

caught up with a moment of compassion I

can't marry Jethro but he proposed and

you accept it if you back out now you'll

be damaging a sacred institution all

right I mean the Commerce Bank

you know how the prophets feel about

honor and beauty

well you might alienate my biggest

depositor

to you this marriage is only a matter of

dollars and cents no always more than

that is millions of dollars millions of

singers

lab it's money you would sacrifice to

people the lives of certain unhappiness

now try me on a hard one

Jethro means too much to me we're

totally unsuited to one another in the

first place I'm several months older

than this

well at least you could give matrimony a

try look what it's done for me

well let's forget that I think of the

romance of marriage a joint checking

account savings and income tax I won't

let Jethro pay a lifetime for his one

moment of mad infatuation uh I'll think

of a way out of this

just watch the phones

watch them don't answer them

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what you doing just trying to figure out

the best way to commit suicide

[Music]

man you ain't rushing into it

Bob decided I'm gonna take an overdose

of food and eat myself to death

that's a fitting way to go

with your stomach I ain't sure it's

possible

quit trying to cheer me up Uncle jet I'm

just desperate about having to marry him

as Jane

I know boy but you're honor Brown it's a

cold of the hill and maybe we could find

a loophole huh

one thing could save you is if Miss Jane

changes her mind women has been known to

do that they're back chains you think

she's going to give up the prize catch

of the century now that she's back

I suppose not anyone invest our girls

she's probably Mighty impressed with his

sixth grade education forget my brain

what about the way I look

well I wouldn't count on that stopping

her it ain't up to now

uh what I meant I know what you meant

boy the way I get insulted around here

marriage is looking better and better

but it still looks awesome I don't give

up boy

she's been in the kitchen ever since I

brought her home she's making up a

anti-love potion for you she better do

something was her that got me into this

your stomach had something to do with it

too I could have stopped it myself for

that matter but

all right Jethro you're saved Ellie

you'll be right along with my anti-love

potion X4 what's that

the charm I never dared try before my

emergency use only

Tucker now make an X4 really took a lot

out of me dead but if you wear it around

your neck it's guaranteed to break up

anything from puppy love to passionate

Romance

what's a horrible smell that's Plum off

what is it anti-love potion X4

thank you

around your neck your throat and it'll

not only ridger of all unwanted

sweetheart and finances but it will k*ll

any flying insect within a hundred yards

any human being with intent America's

invested for I'd wear that thing you'd

have to you wouldn't know near you after

you in general take anti-love potion X4

out Barrett in a deep hole yes sir yes

sir

and stop on the ground hard before you

put it in so the Gophers can get away

I hate to think of what else but it was

the strongest time in my book there's

nothing left for me to make well yeah

there is a wedding cake I guess you're

right he proposed she accepted it's the

code of the Hills

the only thing you could say is stronger

be a shotgun he can use my old

engagement ring it wasn't expensive but

it's got a lot of sentimental value

yeah that's the one your husband carved

out of a marebone

must be a lot of memories attached to it

uh-huh a little gristle too

well it won't be by the time Jethro gets

you to the bank I'll go call Miss Jean

and tell her he'd come

I'm back any messages

your fiance is coming by with your

engagement ring

Jethro will have to keep his diamond

I have decided to come right out and

tell him

not marry him no

it's better that Jethro suffer the agony

now than to live with his dream even a

day longer I'm talking about hurting me

what if we lose the time of the car but

I feel that honesty is the best of us

what kind of crazy nonsense is that I've

got to stop Jethro

I got an engagement ring for you but I

hope you won't mind my toothparks on it

I love secretario I I have bad news for

you I

fry

right

hot dog I'm a remake

no me also nine me is that you

73 million

Mr Clement said Jethro's already left

he's awesome

would you suffering trying to forget

that's right my Brave boy try to forget

try try

[Music]

because now it's time to say goodbye to

Jed and all his skin they would like to

thank you folks for kindly dropping in

you're all invited back next week to

this locality to have a heap and helping

of their Hospitality

hillbilly that is set a spell take your

shoes off I'll come back now you