08x20 - Three-Day Reprieve

[bunniefuu]

come and listen to a story about a man

named Jed a poor Mountaineer barely kept

his family and then one day he was

sh**ting at some food and up through the

ground

or that is Black Gold Texas Tea

well the first thing you know old gems a

millionaire the camera folk said can't

move away from there said California is

a place you ought to be so deluded up

the truck

Hills that is swimming pools movie stars

the Beverly hillbilly

foreign

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Music]

we don't know that for a fact this is a

big place it's all fan out and look for

Jethro you take the upstairs in the

Attic yes sir they may you take the

downstairs and sell her yes sir ready

you take everything out back of the

cement Pond

I'll take the front Alberta you just

wait here for us to flush him out

oh

will you help me find Shorty the son of

a g*n is skipped out on Alberta well

wherever he skipped to it's on foot how

do you know come here I'll show you

[Music]

when you do that Chad last night when

you said it takes three days to get

married out here

that Surety ain't exactly a fairly he

can trust for that loan and it comes to

finding women that little fella puts a

bird dog to shame I shouldn't know what

he had a weakness in that direction when

we checked into the Silver Dollar City

hotel last fall what happened well the

hotel was full up majority was real

extra special accommodate

[Applause]

[Music]

I got a 90.

there's a show business act that Tim two

front rooms they sure was fair uh three

uh acrobats or jugglers or some such out

of Kansas City likely a Wild Bunch I

just put Tim up over at my house and

give you them room we don't want to turn

nobody out oh I'd rather not held him

fast loot showed people here in the

hotel no hell in my house I can keep an

eye on them well that's mighty nice here

uh

I'll have to ask you to pack up you're

moving over to my place

[Music]

how'd you like to be getting A*DS and

find imminent

we got our work cut out for us keeping

track of shorty till after the wedding

well like I said wherever he's hiding he

got there on foot he said why don't we

put that old hound dog to work

ain't that much tracking him quite a

while but I reckon his nose is still

good

you go partner

I hate to get you out of retirement at

your age but uh we got to find a critter

that belongs to these gloves

[Music]

keep your mind on your business you not

only picked up Shorty's Trail he's

picking up his habits come on boy I

think we're closing in

[Music]

Mr Club at mayor Heller good morning

Miss James I had a man I've been trying

to call you surely kellems has locked

himself in the secretarial pool with 12

girls

you cool Tamara you're done good attract

that little rooster right to his

favorite chicken house let's go get him

we might be able to get his attention

from down here

those are the windows of the secretarial

pool just over the main entrance

[Applause]

good how'd you find me we tracked

you with Old Duke

you and your Bloodhound why can't you be

like other folks in Beverly Hills and

have a French poodle

never mind that you come out of there

listen Jed I can't marry El Vernon for

three days NJ right that's right that

gives me three days of grace don't it

true

well say hello to Grace

Jordy you ain't out there in five

minutes Chad's coming up and taking the

door off

y'all gone you shed Heller you had to be

a blacksmith

[Music]

oh come in shorty darling I got a

soothing ice bag for your poor throbbing

head

you ain't heard what Shorty's been doing

you're gonna go tell her are you tell me

what well there are certain things a

fella has to take care of before he gets

married uh that's what I was doing

I'll vouch for that

such as well it's a good idea to have a

doctor check you over draw up a wheel

chair up a wheel shorty

he had another secretaries going I'll

vouch for that

I don't need everything to me dear

took care of a few things myself

Oh you mean world of goods and said yeah

I doubt you if everything else

what did the doctor say

doctor oh Shorty's in fine shape over

and uh the fact is uh he's got strength

enough for 12. I'll bounce for that

shorty darling I'm sorry I mistrusted

you you're almost gonna hit you with a

rolling pin but instead I

[Music]

mean

can't hit me with that rolling pin I

want to see whether I got the best or

the worst of that

[Music]

oh granny have you seen shorty no not

since he come home to eat I prepared his

lunch he sat down took one bite and

disappeared crap simple he's out looking

for a decent meal

some granny he's probably upstairs

changing so you won't get food on his

good clothes yeah Jen me off that team

hey where

'd his head from such a hurry you seen

it yes sir going through the power

then head for the front door and we got

him do you have to throw a standard

watch out front come on Chad

[Music]

not only shorty gone but so is Jethro

Duke when you feed boy we're gonna give

that another year as another workout

foreign

[Music]

he's up there waiting in the secretarial

pool again

Courtney

you already k*ll him

what do you want what do you think we

want we want you to come home behave

yourself one other thing how do you get

past Jethro

[Music]

wanted to stop me at the front door but

I said if he'd show me mercy I'd show

him Faith yeah say a lot of faith

oh Mr Krampus Mr Heller thank goodness

you're here I think it's a great deal

will you please get those two clowns out

of my secretarial pool they're

disrupting the whole Bank we'll get them

out I don't understand how they got in I

posted my best guard outside the door of

the secretarial pool

hey fellas how'd you get past the guard

it didn't I stayed right with him

Jenkins did they bribe you no sir Mr

Drysdale I was having a cup of coffee

and they invited me in for sugar say

hello to Sugar

[Music]

wait a minute Mr dry Dale don't Farm

we'll be right out okay but make it

snappy

I thought you two was gonna keep an eye

on shorty don't worry granny he ain't

gonna stray far this time yeah she had

seen to that

sounds like Ellie's gold is heading this

way no it's alverna's goat

I'll be switched him

that's right they'll go new shed Heller

you had to be a blacksmith

shorty ain't going

no you mean I Gotta Wear this Bell till

I get married

it's the idea

I hope they take it off after the

ceremony otherwise it's likely to be a

noisy honeymoon

I'll tell el Verner you're here she

knows where I'm at everybody knows where

I'm at

all be clanging indirectly

remember when the three of us was boys

together back in the Hills yep remember

what good friends we were borns and

buddies together yep remember how we cut

her thumbs and let her blood mix and

that made us Blood Brothers

yep and remember we swore an old always

to help one another when one of us

needed help

yep

listen fellas no

some brothers you are I want my blood

back

thank you

it's going to be right hard to keep that

little rooster penned up for three days

nobody knows that better than me but I'm

kind of big on that idea Miss Jane had

oh yeah where she fixes up the

photograph of Val Verna

yeah gee Phil I take this Photograph up

to Mr Clapton now oh yeah let's see it

this is alverna Bradshaw well only the

head the body belongs to a Pity contest

winner

you should reawaken Shorty's interests

Nell burner don't you think I said they

hope so anything to keep out of that

secretarial pool

[Music]

I planted a picture Ted good Miss James

out front waiting for our signal

Here Comes shorty Bell and him was a

beautiful idea

what you doing Chad

looking for a picture I brought from

Mike home

what picture is that it's Alberta

Bradshaw in a bathing suit don't find it

I just ate

sure hope you remembered to bring it

Chad that magazine is awful anxious to

use it

what magazine is that beef Gorge Gazette

Journey have you forgotten that alverna

won the Silver Dollar City beauty

contest come on Chad if she's the only

one in it she'd come in second

have you ever seen alverna in a bikini

if I had do you think I'd ask her to

come out here and marry me

Uncle David uh did marijuana locate the

picture of alverna Bradshaw not yet here

it is Miss Hathaway oh good

painting Beauty magazine is waiting for

it pain Beauty magazine yes yes it

published pictures of beauty queens from

all over the world well thank you so

much mayor hello

did I have a look at that picture

I think that would be wise Mr kellums

why not well it's three days until your

wedding and this picture is bound to be

rather well

come on please

well since you are going to marry her

thank you

foreign

[Music]

get that figure I never know Dale Vernon

has been like that

that woman has got more curves than a

goat pad

I don't know why you fellas are so

surprised alverna's always had a great

shape she just dresses to hide it she

sure does

keep the magazine waiting well thank you

so much mayor Heather

are you sure you have to wait three days

to get married out here

that's the law

before him oh yes ma'am the way he was

shouted in battles well his little Old

Bell was just flaming away to beat the

bank oh I am a good cook uh my food is

very dietetic uh non-fattening that is

have you noticed how my finger has

slimmed down the Danny Miss Bradshaw

thank you

sounds like Shorty's coming back for

more

[Music]

let's go swimming

these women yeah for that beautiful body

of yours into one of them bikinis Rescue

out and have a look yeah I do

but I haven't been swimming for years

you don't know what you've been missing

me too but I didn't bring a swimming

suit well I got one young boy Miss

Bradshaw there you are and it'll fit you

too you and Ellie's Builder like you

know you really think so two peas in the

pot

oh but it's chilly out there well it's

nice and warm in the Sun

besides

I know where granny hide your jug we'll

have a nip in the dip why this sudden

craze for swimming oh it's good for you

best exercise there is it's been so long

I'm not even sure I can swim who cares

we just lay around look at one another

Come On

Son k*ll him you're a naughty little

scam

just in case we get a chill my dear you

know I don't approve of alcohol in any

form not even that gorgeous form of

yours

I'm gonna deal with you in the next

three days well think of something

come on and he may get her in one of

them bikinis and their bikini or the

better I just can't say no to you

the devil

going that woman really Rings My Bell

[Music]

foreign

[Music]

[Music]

shorty I told you I do not approve of

alcohol lips that touch liquor shall

never touch mine

in that case I won't touch a drop Thomas

I swear just to look at your gorgeous

figures going to be intoxicating enough

come on honey intoxicate me

here goes the unveiling

[Music]

he's gone and he's gone oh sorry my

beloved my patrol don't it's all my

fault I gave him too much too soon

I'll vouch for that I heard him ringing

around upstairs just a few minutes ago

oh my goodness I was afraid I'd

overstimulated him

[Music]

here he comes with bells on

hey everybody look what you already

given but he said this Bell is a real

girl getter

Jethro how did Jordy get that thing off

oh he didn't I did how did you do it I

just bent open one of the links on the

Chain come on Jed let's get Old Duke and

hit the trail I don't think we're gonna

need to hound dog this time I know just

where he is he too

I gave him a glimpse of me in a bikini

and it drove him wild

I had to do it

Chief I'm afraid short is the

secretarial poll again this time he's

not only locked the door but barricaded

it I've had enough of this I'm going to

call the police

okay

Johnny this is Melbourne Drysdale

speaking president of the Commerce Bank

of Beverly Hills

where you are savings earn you five

percent compounds

there's no time for a commercial there's

a wild man barricaded up there with 12

secretaries okay

the police had the building surrounded

there's absolutely no Escape come out

this land I won't press any charge

just a minute Mr Garfield I can't hear

what you said good morning you girls

turn off that record player for a minute

now what do you want

I want you to release those girls and

come out of that building if you don't

you're going to jail I swear to jail

don't scare me none in three days I

start serving the license

so I'm gonna have me three days of joy

say hello to Joy

yeah I'll have the police closed

he'll never Take Me Alive before they

can bust in I'll dance myself to death

boy

excuse me Mr dry Dale could I say a word

to shorty of course Miss climber

shorty

there's Jed Clampett speaking

Jazz down here with me and uh we'd like

to remind you of something what's that

Chad

one of three of us was boys together we

promised to share and share like if one

of us uh had a good thing going and he

let the others in on his right Chad

he's telling the truth shorty what are

you getting that

don't be so stingy

you got a good thing going up there let

the rest of us in on it they did that's

a great idea come on up everybody and

join the party all right well you miss a

great deal that's a brilliant idea

[Music]

ladies and gentlemen you're all invited

to join the party the second floor of my

bank and as you get to Ronald that

you'll find application forms for new

accounts and the man who makes the

largest deposit gets to dance but the

prettiest sections

[Applause]

home

[Music]

bad guys beware Peter Falk is Colombo oh

thank you very much tomorrow night at

five on Hallmark Channel

Maxine's job is to keep families

together in just a few minutes you will

be one big happy family including her

own come on you have to stop stop I know

you mean well but you really have to let

me grow up

I thought I did that already Amy

Brenneman and Tyne Daly in Judging Amy