10x10 - Rats

[bunniefuu]

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- In the darkness, that's when
everything starts coming out.

Check that out.

As soon as things
start getting bad,

You have to be able to
turn to something else.

A hardened knife in
the canadian bush.

- Brr.

I'm gonna build a
wood processing holder

To cut my wood on.

If I keep the fire going 24/7,

That's gotta be cut every day.

I am tired and I am sore.

- What the hell?

I might have something
in my gillnet.

Can't believe it!

[chuckles] it worked!

All your birthdays
you don't remember,

I'll definitely remember
my 52nd birthday.

As the game wears
on, like it is now,

I can just feel that
the mental game's

Starting to play
on me a little bit.

I miss my family dearly,
and I miss my kids.

- I had no idea
that being by myself

Would have such an effect on me.

I have a person who
I love back home.

I don't want to spend
another day away from him.

So I'm tapping out.

Every day is precious.

I wanna spend that
time making memories

With the people who are
the most important to me.

♪ ♪

- I'm gonna do this,
man. I'm gonna do this.

I'm gonna fight this thing
out to the last breath.

[dramatic music]

- Ok.

Game on. [bear huffs]

- I got him.

Narrator: In "alone's"
most remote location yet...

- [shouting] yes!

Narrator: Ten participants set
out to survive at all costs.

- My goal is stay alive.

- [hisses, groans]

Narrator: Battling
extreme isolation...

- There is no camera crews.
You are really alone.

- It'll eat at you, tear you up.

- God, why?
- It's a battle.

Nobody ever comes out the same.

- Oh, man.
- It'd be impossible to.

Narrator: And
fierce predators.

- It's a big bear. It's
right outside my shelter.

- Predators like that
damn sure gonna k*ll you.

- Please don't rip my face off.

[animal snarls] he bit
the hell out of me.

Narrator: They'll
endure merciless wind...

- Been over 60 hours,
and it has not let up.

- I can hear the trees
falling down around me.

Narrator: And bitter cold...

- This whole place just
turned into a frozen hell.

Narrator: Last one standing...

- It's a moose. Wow.

- [whoops]

- No, no!

Narrator: Wins.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- Look, nikolai.

♪ ♪

It's a snowman!

Check him out. He's
got his broomstick.

He's got his buttons.

He's got his pipe, and his nose,

And his little hat.

That's so cool.

He's really gonna
like that snowman.

It's still spitting snow,
but it's starting to warm up.

Can't wait for all
this be over with

So I can be home with you,

Get to hug you again.

♪ ♪

But daddy's gotta
go hunting now.

He's gotta go try
to get some food.

If he don't, he'll
be home a lot sooner

Than what we thought.

♪ ♪

Sun's starting to come out.

Let's see if anything
else wants to come out.

It snowed all night long.

I was hoping to see
something fresh this morning.

As seasons change,

The patterns of
the animals change.

Animals that were nocturnal
start day walking.

As food sources
dissipate, animals move.

I expected, you know,

See some raccoon or some fox,

Rabbit, or something.

No sign. No track.

As soon as you learn all
the patterns of fall,

Then it's wintertime.

Everything that you just spent

The past two months learning

Means nothing anymore.

Only trail out here's mine.

I'm at a disadvantage
as the season changes.

I've never been here
through a winter.

There's people that are
from canada that have

Hunt these animals
their entire lives,

So they have the advantage.

♪ ♪

Oh, looky there.

That's a rat.

So, so far, we've seen
sign of some rats.

Ain't that just something?

My feet are freezing.

Time to head back
to the shelter,

Let my toes warm up.

Nothing today.

Even in the snow, I'm
not finding any sign.

I don't think I've
ever hunt this long

And not k*lled anything.

Try to k*ll some rats
tonight, I guess.

Right now, I'm
feeling kind of low.

I'm not getting enough to eat.

I got my son's
birthday coming up.

That's been weighing on my head.

Coming out here,

The only thing I was
afraid of was failure.

If I fail this, feel
like I failed my son,

Feel like I failed my wife,

Feel like I failed
the rest of the kids.

And if I don't start
eating, I'm gon' fail.

Trying to set a rat trap.

Maybe get me a rat.

Still got fat I can
lose. Thankful for that.

Rats, if that's what I'm
gonna be given to live off of

'till something
else comes through,

By god, we're gonna rat it up.

It's standing. It's set.

Hopefully, first
thing in the morning,

I'll eat some rats.

Then I'll go get a grouse.

And then, when the moose
walks in front of my shelter,

I'll stick it too.

[moose calls]

I'll eat my whole
moose back strap.

Then when the bear comes
up, I'll stick the bear.

[bear growls]

Then I'll render
fat from the bear

And I'll fry everything,

And it'll all be delicious.

And I'll make it 175 days.

I'll be the last man standing.

[dreamy music]

♪ ♪

Or...

Maybe I get a rat.

I was expecting more now.
Maybe... maybe I get a rat.

Be happy as hell if I get a rat.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

[ice crackling]

♪ ♪

[waves lapping softly]

- Good morning, campers.

She's a beautiful morning.

Little breezy coming
out of the south,

But all in all, not too bad.

Temperatures warmed up today.

There was a good inch of snow.

Like, it was
completely white here,

But melted last night.

Hopefully, we'll have a
nice round of weather.

We're gonna go
check our gillnet.

♪ ♪

We got the bow all strung up.

See if we can't find another
grouse or a squirrel.

The boreal forest, I've
lived in it a long time,

And for the winter,
I've got every advantage

As far as that goes.

The wind is absolutely
crazy right now.

It's a little bit southwest
still, which I prefer,

From the north, 'cause that
brings in ugly [bleep] weather.

Out here, there's a
bunch of these people

That are far from quitters,

But we're into the serious
stages now, boys and girls.

I don't know how
many people are left,

But it won't be a lot.
That, I assure you.

I hate to say it, but
I hope the rest of them

Aren't having quite
as good a time as me.

[chuckles softly]

We're down to the time where

It's gonna be a
lot of mental game.

You can't come and do
this and worry about home.

When you start getting that
way, you lose all focus.

And out here, it's
all about focus.

That wind is raw.

And it's powerful.

So we're just approaching
our gillnet here.

You hear the waves?

They're white.

[waves crashing] these
waves are pretty rough.

You can hear 'em smashing here.

And these rocks gonna
be slippery as hell.

Oh, and it looks like
I got another fish.

Oh-h*!

[grunts]

Careful not to fall in.

[waves crashing]

Oh, no! He's gonna get out.

He's almost out.
Get him over, quick.

♪ ♪

- Oh, no! He's gonna get out.

Get him over, quick.

Yeah!

Oh-h*, that's close.

He is almost out of that net.

[chuckles]

Another beautiful
whitefish, though.

That is awesome.

Ok.

That's a beautiful 3
to 4 pound whitefish.

So we have some cleaning
and some smoking to do.

Oh, good stuff.

[intriguing music]

♪ ♪

All right.

Well, we're back at camp.

♪ ♪

I'm gonna eat a piece
of this tonight,

Just because I haven't had
a piece of fresh whitefish,

And this is as fresh as it gets.

You know, the days
are getting cooler.

I'm gonna spend a
little more energy.

I'll eat a little more.

Why not? I deserve it.
I've been doing good.

In all fairness, I hope
they're dropping like flies.

♪ ♪

I got lots in me left.

Lots.

We're not going nowhere.

♪ ♪

So let's take this over to
the filleting block now.

♪ ♪

I think it was day 35,

I said I'd finally come
to peace with this land

And this land had
come to peace with me.

And nothing here has
been too tough yet.

I shouldn't say that.

From the time I
was nine years old,

I was kind of a social outcast.

Not many were into the
hunting and fishing,

And not the way I was.

I just wanted to get off
the bus and run to the bush.

I just wanted to go
to my happy place.

And the alcohol and that

Just seemed to kind
of fall into place.

From the time I was
basically 14, I drank.

I really hope one day,

I can bring my wife and my boys,

Stand here, camp for
a night, go fishing.

Let 'em feel the experience
the way I felt it.

It's something I'd truly
love to share with them.

There's a lot of things
I'd love to share with 'em.

That's the one thing I say,
you don't get time back.

I'm doing this challenge
for a variety of reasons.

One is to prove to
myself that I can.

And another is to
let mother mature

And the things I love
help try and heal me.

I need to forgive and
forget a lot of things,

And that includes forgiving
myself for a lot of things.

Kinda one thing that I
know I've done out here...

Is I've let the wind...

Blow away a lot of dirt...

That has been stuck to
me for way too long.

This whole "alone" thing
is really something that

A lot of people can
really benefit from.

I know... I know I have.

No matter what the outcome is,

I have benefited immensely.

Immensely.

♪ ♪

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- Ok, folks, it's time
for the skinny check.

I'm definitely getting low.

So viewer discretion is advised.

[grunts]

I still have some fat here.

Pretty skinny around the waist.

Looks like I have
some fat here, too.

Ok, I still got some fat.

I got some loving left to go.

Right around here, I got fat.

Here and here.

I feel like... last night,
I scratched my back,

And it felt... It
kind of felt bony,

So we'll see how it goes.

Ok, now it's time to fish.

♪ ♪

Kinda gray and cloudy,
but it has warmed up

Like you wouldn't believe.

Think a big warm
front came in here.

Almost all the snow's gone.

Here we go.

I'm excited to fish.

Cold, miserable, snowy days

Are just around
the corner any time

And they might stay this time.

There might not be
a warm-up period.

So I gotta take advantage
of this good weather.

[whistles] she's casting nice.

Come on, let's get a fish on.

Need to get a couple more fish.

I'm pretty lean right now,

And I'm starting to
feel it more and more.

Like, when I wake up, I got
this tension in my chest,

And my stomach just
feels so hollow.

Hungry is my normal.

I worry I'm not
sustaining myself

With half a fish a day.

If it doesn't get better,
I'm gonna increase it to 1.5

And see if that
makes a difference.

But that decreases
my time here, right,

So I'll need more fish.

Let's get a hook up, please.

I need to eat.

Oh, that's depressing.

Oh, there's a bite.

Come on.

C'mon.

Come on, come on.

We got one! [laughs]

Finally.

Woo!

Two more days.

Two more days.

Yes!

We're well into this game now.

Every fish I get
could be that fish

That pushes me
the next two days,

And the next two days,

Till the last person
who's left taps out.

So one of these fish
could be worth $500,000.

It's pretty crazy
to think about, man.

[sighs]

So we're gonna clean him,

Then we're gonna get
him on the smoker.

I feel like I've cleaned
a lot of fish this trip.

It's hard to know who's left.

How many people are left?

I'm gonna guess.

All right, mel and luke,

Or jodi rose,

And wyatt, 'cause I know
wyatt's a fisherman.

If I can catch fish, he
could be catching fish, too.

Heart has to be
eaten, of course.

Who knows?

A lot of strong competitors.

I have a chance, but
it'll be a grind.

I know it will be.

Oh, my god.

He's got these white
growths all over his guts.

And his whole liver is
covered in them, too.

Hm.

That's not good.

See all those white cysts?

They're everywhere.

[bleep].

[soft dramatic music]

- Oh, my god.

See all those white cysts?

They're everywhere.

[bleep].

That's not good.

I don't know what to do.

♪ ♪

I can't lose this fish.

[exhales]

♪ ♪

I think it's ok.

I'm gonna give him a rinse.

♪ ♪

At this stage of the game,

Every calorie counts,
boys and girls.

I'm just hoping that I
don't get sick from it.

[grunts]

Ok, let's fillet this guy,

Starting with the ol' melon.

I wanna stay out here
for as long as I can.

But I can just feel
that the mental game's

Starting to play
on me a little bit.

Their skin is so tough.

Those thoughts of worry
about home, you know,

And wondering how
everyone's doing,

And just... Just
missing loved ones.

♪ ♪

Oh, [bleep], did I cut myself?

Yep.

Darn it.

Just a little one. It's
not bad. It's not bad.

Could've been bad.

Could've been bad.

Be careful.

See, I am bleeding.

Oh, well.

Hopefully doesn't get infected.

I wanna go home, but I
don't wanna leave here.

Ready for the smoker,
just like that.

Here's what helps me. I say,
ok, I tap out. I go home.

It's gonna be me at home again.

Don't go back to work
till the end of January.

My wife works all day.

My daughter goes to school.

And I'm like, I
should've pushed harder.

I wanna have no regrets
when I get back.

Yeah, I think I'm just
gonna eat this half

And just smoke this half.

I'm gonna do that
right now, actually.

We got a nice coal bed going.

All right, we're smoking meat!

Let's throw that fish on.

I wanna make sure I
cook it really well.

♪ ♪

She's cooking in there
away, boiling nice.

k*lling any botulism or giardia
or whatever is in the meat,

Just in case it's not... Oh,
headrush... good anymore.

It's a risk, I know.

Let's do it. I think I'm ready.

But I think it'll be ok.

I'm just a little
nervous about it.

I don't wanna go out
on something stupid.

♪ ♪

I'm just having a
close look at the meat

To make sure
there's no parasites

Or anything in there,

Because he had something
wrong with him inside.

♪ ♪

As long as I'm eating
and my body feels ok,

I think I can push.

Here we go, let's push.

A little bit overcooked,

But I wanted to do
that just in case.

Delicious.

So fresh.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

[rock thumps]

♪ ♪

[rock thumps]

- We got two rats last night.

Hard to hold on to
the little guys.

Two of 'em, which is awesome.

Two little rats.

I've been up since


To catch those two rats.

That's some dedication.

♪ ♪

Get them all cleaned
up, ready to eat.

♪ ♪

These are the stinking-est
little animals to clean.

It may just be from being
crushed under a rock.

Don't care how little they are.

I just need the protein.

When my daddy said, "I taught
you how to survive, son,"

Don't think he
meant eating rats.

I'm not just gonna
settle for rats.

If I can go get
birds and squirrels,

Then that's what I'm gonna do.

But if I have to eat rats,

I'll eat rats.

Another little rat skin.

I could make a stuffed rat.

A little rat teddy bear.

We've got some baling
twine right here.

Gonna try to sew this guy up.

I've been making toys for
my son for his birthday.

My kids are gonna say, "did
you seriously stuff rats?"

I'll say, "damn
straight, I did."

Trying to keep my mind
off of everything.

Can't stop thinking
about my son's birthday.

It's k*lling me. It really is.

Yeah, I was a little
selfish coming out here.

I wanted to take a break.

I wanted to not have to go to
work every day for a while.

Well, that was like,
the hardest thing ever.

♪ ♪

There it is, nicky.

A little stuffed mouse.

Check him out.

Oop.

The only thing he's
missing's his tail.

That's 'cause when
I was skinning him,

I accidentally cut it off.

♪ ♪

Get this guy cooked up.

♪ ♪

Maybe I should just
tap and go home.

Let all of this be over.

A little rat heart.

Now for the rest of it.

Whole rat on a stick.

But it won't be over, will it?

I'll get up every morning,

And I'll leave my house to work.

I break my back
for as little pay

As somebody can get from me.

Is that selfish of me?

The only thing I
can't eat's his teeth.

I'm here to give my son a
better life than what he has

And what I can
give him otherwise.

I'm given an opportunity.

All I gotta do is
make it out here.

Hell, if I can make
it every day at home,

I can make it here.

I've survived everything
in my life this far.

And that's a wrap.

It's great while you got
it, and then it's gone.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- It's so cold outside.

You can feel the temperature
has dropped last couple days.

The warm weather is over.

Last night was the
first night where

I was really cold
in my sleeping bag.

This is an expensive
sleeping bag

From a reputable company

That is rated for minus 40,

And I was, like, having
convulsive shivers

I was so cold.

When you're shivering,

That's the first
stage of hypothermia.

And if you don't warm
up, you can end up dying.

So I got up, put on my sweater,

And I ended up
going right inside

My sleeping bag and sealing it,

And just a little air hole
to breathe, and that worked.

That... that warmed me up.

I wasn't totally
prepared for that.

So if that happens again, I'm
simply gonna light a fire,

Warm up a few rocks,

And put a few in
my sleeping bag.

It's a very dangerous situation.

So that kind of was a
bit of a wake-up call.

♪ ♪

It's day 48.



And it's [bleep]
cold this morning.

Excuse my language.

But it's calm.
There's no wind.

And we're gonna go
fishing right now.

Let's... oh, tripod's
frozen to the ground.

There we go.

[chuckles softly]

Man.

I just didn't expect it
to get this cold so fast.

Everything's just a
little harder in the cold,

Getting out your sleeping
bag, getting dressed.

The wood's all got a layer
of ice on it, and it's cold.

Takes a while to get going.

Just makes it a little
bit more challenging.

See what we got.

Come on lake trout.

It's ok. It's ok.

It's gonna work out.

I have a feeling the
fishing's gonna be ok today.

It's only been cold
for a couple days.

I think there's still
gonna be fish around,

But I don't believe
there'll be fish around

For too much longer.

All right, hand, stay warm.

Tomorrow is day 49.

50's exciting to me.

That's... that's
deep in the game.

Hands are getting cold.

50 days, big milestone for me.

Can't even feel my hands.

Can't feel the string.

It just keeps slipping
out of my hands.

It's a little too cold.

[sighs] this is
gonna be challenging,

Fishing in this weather.

Hm. How am I gonna do this?

One more good one.

Whoa! [gasps]

No!

Oh, sh**t.

Oh, no.

My spool just went in the water.

This is bad. This
is really bad.

Uh, wow. Ok.

[tense music]

I have the other end,
and I have a spare spool,

So it's not the
end of the world.

It's just kind of scary.

That's what happens
with cold hands.

[sighs]

That's been my biggest
fear that I'd do that.

If that other thing had gone
in the water, it's done.

Unless I would go for a swim.

Oh, man, but when
it's this cold,

You might actually pass out.

Just gonna wrap
it around this one

Until it comes up, hopefully.

As long as it doesn't get stuck.

Definitely getting a
little harder to be here.

Any work you do
without your gloves on,

Your hands just
instantly get cold,

And it's hard to warm 'em up.

Challenging times for fishing.

Oh, here we go.

Ok, we're good to go.

I'm lucky.

Really, really
lucky I got it back.

That's why you always tie
your line to your spools.

Think I'm done fishing.

My fingers are too cold.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- Got some reindeer moss.

Doesn't that look
just delicious?

I'm gonna pretend
it's sauerkraut.

Yeah, I'll pretend
it's sauerkraut.

This is something I can
spend some time processing

A lot of it, just have
in a bag in the shelter.

We'll let it boil
for a little while.

♪ ♪

I don't remember the
last time I got a grouse.

Seems like I got four
or five of 'em in a row,

And then, bam, it stopped.

I haven't caught a
single fish, man.

I see 'em jumping all the time.

Can't never get
out there to 'em.

There's probably people on
here living off of fish.

Yesterday's butt-wiping paper,

Today's brunch.

I'm trying to learn
everything in a short time.

Not actually all that bad.

It's hard as hell,

But at the same time, I'm
a stubborn a*s [bleep]

That just won't quit.

Roasted, it kinda tastes
like wheat cereal.

The little mini-wheats.

I don't know if it's pride,

Or just the fact that I may
never get this chance again

To make this kind of
money, I just won't quit.

It's like a hot meal, which
is what I needed today.

I'd love to have a
squirrel or a rabbit.

But I got some rats. Super
thankful for the rats.

'cause it could be worse.
I could not have any.

That would really suck.

Little pestle and
mortar project here.

Maybe you can see it a
little better out here.

♪ ♪

See how far I carved
that thing down?

Look at that.

I'm gonna make my wife
a pestle and mortar.

Last night, got it started.

See if I can coal burn this.

♪ ♪

It's the only thing
she asked for.

♪ ♪

It's hard, you know?
You wanna go home.

Thinking, "hell, I could have

My wife's delicious
cooking again."

And that's, you
know, pretty much

Whatever I say I want,
she'll make it for me.

She's an amazing woman.

[groans] this is
where I'm sitting.

My wife, she gave up her life

To make sure that my
son was taken care of.

She stays there with
him all the time,

Same as I stay at
work all the time.

He needs a caretaker.

She takes care of him
and I take care of them.

There's not a whole
lot of people that

Give up their entire life

And provide for their family.

She's always made it an
effort to care for me,

Which is something I
never had growing up.

Even right now, she's just
waiting on me to be home

So that she could
take care of me.

Never had that before.

The hungry is
starting to get to me.

Yep, I can feel it.

The hungry's starting
to get to me.

♪ ♪

The absolute best
thing you could do is

Just keep going.

I cannot let the
hunger get to me yet.

♪ ♪

[soft intriguing music]

♪ ♪

I gotta go find it.

[soft dramatic music]

♪ ♪

Dammit.

He got away from me.

They just come out
at the worst times,

When I'm not ready for them.

That would have
been a good dinner.

More food than what I've seen.

It's always just right there
out of reach, ain't it?

Living off of rats ain't living.

You've... you have made it
through worse than this, mikey.

Just man the [bleep] up,

Do what you gotta do.

Do not waste this.

There's $500,000 on
the line here, buddy.

Just quit bitching.

Cut it off.

If you missed your son's
only fifth birthday,

And you don't give


Then you're a piece of [bleep].

♪ ♪

Don't [bleep] this up.

♪ ♪

All right.

I'd say that's enough work on
this for tonight, probably.

I'll build my rat traps.

Work on this some more
whenever I get a chance to.

Stay busy.

All be over before you know it.

Then you can go home to
the family that loves you.

And you can be with them
for a long, long, long,

Long, long time

And you won't have to
leave every single day.

♪ ♪

What the hell?

Oh, no.

♪ ♪

I get in my shelter,

And all of my stuffed
rats have been taken.

The rat that I k*lled
last night has been taken.

My gut can is over
there completely empty.

Something got in
my shelter today

And ate all of that.

It was probably
that [bleep] marten,

That one I was chasing earlier.

Little b*stard.

God!

Here I am talking about,
"oh, just suck it up.

"you know, it's
just another day.

You're gonna be fine."

And the whole time,

Something's up here...

Eating everything that
I've worked hard for.

Oh, I'm pissed.

I just cannot believe that.

It ate my stuffed rats.

Hell, they're full of moss.

I've been violated.

Can't even leave my shelter
for fear of getting robbed.

I wish he'd walk
in here right now.

Rules is rules or whatever,

But I'd stab that
son of a [bleep].

I'd hit him with my [bleep] axe.

♪ ♪

That... mm.

Makes me so damned
mad, I can't stand it.

It's probably gonna
keep coming back

Until I can k*ll it.

♪ ♪

I am struggling.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- Once again, we
are on the move.

We've had a big, big breakfast.

I was kind of a
piggy this morning.

But I'm good with that.

I am being a little bit less
conservative on the food,

Knowing how much I have now.

I feel so much better

Mentally and physically.

Out here, everything
seems clearer.

I've drank since I can remember.

Everybody in my life
basically has asked, begged,

Pleaded with me to quit.

It's caused me
trouble with the law,

Trouble with wives,
girlfriends, family,

Myself, and with my dad,

But I didn't care.

I used it for different purposes

So I didn't have to deal with

Things I didn't
want to deal with.

Man that I am today would
take that little boy aside

And try and guide him
down a better road.

Sometimes, you just gotta
stop and have a look around

To realize how much
beauty's there.

It's incredible.

I'm hoping to have mother nature

Help me heal myself.

The only way I can do that
is to be in an environment

Where I'm comfortable

And not clouded with alcohol
and outside influences.

Just me and the truth

And sound of silence.

♪ ♪

Well, we're coming back
here to the gillnet.

I always get excited now

Every time I'm coming
to this gillnet.

See what we got in
the gillnet here.

I hope there's a fish in it.

Oh, look at that.

We've got another one.

It's a beauty, too.

Another big pike.

Yeah!

♪ ♪

He's mine.

Oh, yeah.

That right there

Puts me damn close to day 100.

Damn close.

I made a lot of
mistakes in my life.

I wish I could change
it, but I can't.

But I can change tomorrow,

And the next day,
and the next day.

Yeah, baby.

Oh, look at that!

Look at that fish.

Oh!

What a pig.

♪ ♪

The last thing my
dad said to me...

Was "you know how to fish.

"find lake trout in the shoals,

"find the pike in
the right spots.

"you know where they are.
You know how to do it."

[wind blowing]

[chuckles] "go do it!"

We're [bleep] doing it, baby.

[laughs] yeah!

Oh, we've done it.

We've [bleep] done it.

Oh!

♪ ♪

My dad and I, we've had
our struggles in life.

We've put a lot of
[bleep] behind us.

And because of that,

I got a lot of admiration
and respect for him.

He is certainly a very big
part of the reason that

I have the abilities to
come out here and do this.

It's one of the many
reasons I chose him to be

The guy who comes and
gets me if I win this.

To have him come here,
see this beautiful land,

And be the guy that I can share

All the moments with
first before I get back,

I'd love for him to be that guy.

And because of that,

I'll be fighting her out
every tooth and nail I got.

♪ ♪

[desolate music]

♪ ♪

- So this is what
I'm waking up to.

Snowed a little
more than I thought.

Wow. [chuckles softly]

Day 50 in with a
bang, that's for sure.

Super cold, man. I wish
I knew the temperature.

Oh, I...

Got a big melon on
me with this thing.

Huh.

Let's head down to the rock,

And hopefully, we can fish.

♪ ♪

It's by far the coldest day.

♪ ♪

Day 50. I made it.

This was my goal but
I'm gonna keep pushing.

Let's see what we got.

It's getting a little bit
harder to be here every day.

I'm homesick.

I miss my family.

I miss the comforts of life.

Ooh, ok, there's a dry spot.

That means we can fish.

♪ ♪

Uh-oh.

Ok, what's the
best way down here?

This is ice. I
have to be careful.

It's kind of treacherous.

[ice cracking] woo!

Ok, let's just make sure
that that's not ice.

We're gonna go down here.

That is so slippery. Oh,
my god. That's scary.

♪ ♪

This isn't ice.

[boots scuffing]

Ok, this is safe. That's not.

I have to stay right
here and land my fish.

This has good potential
for "wipeout."

And it's all gonna be on camera.

I like to continually
challenge myself.

♪ ♪

I've been a fan of
the show for a while.

Wow, this lake is
gonna freeze very soon.

Watching the old shows,

I took things I liked
from past competitors

And modified things
I didn't like.

Anybody still
around these parts?

I was like, always
critiquing, "what is he doing?

"what's he doing putting
the fish in that pool?

Man, something's
gonna take it."

I did learn a lot of like,

Expending too many
calories on your shelter,

And there's always someone
that goes out with a gi issue.

I wanted to make sure
that didn't happen to me.

I feel cold already.

Man, that's not good.

Since I found out
that I was accepted,

I kept notes of

Anything that popped in my
mind. I'd write it down,

And then I'd find
the answer to it.

I drove my family
a little bit crazy

'cause that's all
I thought about.

It's really helped me.

I wasn't sure if I'd
make it this long.

Oh, man, can't
even feel my hands.

All right, little hand warm-up.

It's been very cold,
and it hasn't warmed up.

So I'm starting to realize
that my food procurement

May be coming to an end

Until the ice is thick
enough to ice fish.

♪ ♪

No takers.

Nothing.

[groans]

I did what, like, five casts

And my hands are, like,
not doing well right now.

It's just too cold.

I'm gonna head back
to the shelter.

Leading up to this experience,
I thought about these days.

When the winter is
here, and it's cold,

And you can't fish anymore,

The small game has gone
back into the forest

Where you're in the shelter
a lot, you're depleted...

And I'm feeling pretty depleted,

I'm not gonna lie...

I talked about these dark days

With my family and my brothers,

Who were worried about me
during these dark days.

It's time for some fish.

Having 1 and 1/2 slabs today.

I was wondering what
these days would be like,

And they've just started

Since the snowstorm
and the cold set in.

Big meal today.

I'm going for it.

And I have to go off my stores.

So I'm gonna eat
my stores of food

And just bide my time,

Hoping that my
competitors don't have

Quite as much food as me.

This is a new chapter
to the experience:

The cold and the snow.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- Hello! Hello! Good morning!

[in thick accent] good
morning, good morning.

Welcome to my land. Ha-ha!

What a beautiful day in
the land of reindeer lake.

Ha-ha-ha!

It is cold, it is
snowy, and I love it!

It is the weather that we like.

It's good for work, yeah?

No. Yeah.

Now, let's go to work, huh?

All right.

[soft determined music]

That was one nasty, ugly night.

I burned a lot of
wood last night.

And we will be keeping
a fire going 24/7.

That's kind of a necessity,
as far as I'm concerned.

One thing's for sure,

That is one hell of a
change in the weather,

No question about it.

And I think it's here to stay.

So anyway,

That being said,

We've got a lot of
wood to get cut.

We're just gonna make sure we
keep going at a steady pace.

We need to cut 50
pieces of wood.

♪ ♪

One.

[laughs]

Thomas edison once said,

"opportunity is
most often missed

"'cause it's dressed in overalls

And looks like work."

Well, if you think
you're gonna be out here

And win this competition,
or challenge,

Or whatever we want to call it,

Without work, and I mean
hard work, you're a fool.

♪ ♪

Whoa!

That slippery damn rock.

This is a challenge
where there's no excuses.

There's nothing except you.

h*! Right where we
wanted it to be.

You gotta be able to embrace
everything about this,

Not just the place,

But the goal you're
trying to achieve.

That's got some weight to it.

If I can do that,

And walk away with 500 grand,

God, how much better
does it get than that?



No cheating.

Not allowed.

You'll only cheat yourself.

That is a full day.

♪ ♪

[sighs] well, day 50.

In the books.

Kinda.

I just gotta eat.

It is cooling off in a big way.

It took literally minutes
for my water to freeze.

Buon appetito.

♪ ♪

Mm-mm!



There's not gonna be a
tree left on this point.

Ah, delicious.

All right.

Day 50, gone.

How awesome.

Peace out. Good night.

♪ ♪

[fire crackling]

[bleep].

[wood popping]

Holy [bleep]!

♪ ♪

The wind switched direction
and the chimney caught fire.

Holy [bleep].

Oh, man.

[bleep].

[tense music]

- Holy [bleep]. Bit
of a fire going on.

[bleep].

Gonna dump some
water on the chimney.

[wind howling]

Phew.

Got it out.

That was scary.

Literally seconds away from
having that shelter gone.

Woke up to my shelter on fire.

My own negligence.

The day I had,

I forgot to water down all
the moss on my shelter.

And I just about paid the
ultimate price for it.

Oh.

Man!

Day I had.

Holy [bleep].

That was close.

I'm gonna...

Shut the light out
here for a minute,

Make sure I got no embers.

But I threw an awful
pile of water to her.

Holy [bleep].

Bottom's still good.

[wind rushing] sure
you can hear that wind.

She's not letting up at all.

She's gonna be a long night.

So I'm gonna sit here
until this fire goes out.

So there goes any chance of
a peaceful night's sleep.

[tense music]

♪ ♪

Holy, [bleep] damn wind.

[wind gusting] like,
crazy, crazy wind.

It's still blowing.

The wind must be
changing direction,

'cause every once in a while,

She just lets a waft
of smoke in here.

She's just one
relentless, ugly night.

Waves are crashing.

♪ ♪

Considering last night
was the worst night

That I've been here,

No problem.

I don't know what
the wind chill factor

Would be out there right now.

I've gotta get this
chimney in order...

Assess the damage
in the daylight,

See what's really happened.

I don't think it was much
more than the moss burning out

And a little bit
up around the top.

But I wanna to be sure.

I think what I'm gonna do is

I'm gonna just
start carting stone

And just pile and pile and pile

And pile and pile and pile
on stone, stone, stone,

And not have to
worry about the moss,

And just keep as much
air from coming through

With the stone.

[wind gusting]

I am sure not looking
forward to going outside.

[laughs]

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

Well, this is our morning.

♪ ♪

The shelter survived.

There's where...

It knocked everything
down off the chimney.

♪ ♪

It was all on fire down here.

I got a lot of work to do today.

I'm gonna bring the rocks
from my other pit over here.

I've had a lot of
tough things in my life

And things that I've had to
really work at to overcome.

And stepping into the
wild is no different.

Everything's a
challenge out here.

The more I can just
keep building it out...

[determined string music]

The less wind gets in,

It's not gonna light
my building on fire.

I just gotta keep this end wet.

♪ ♪

We'll fill it the best we can.

♪ ♪

The best we can do

Is the best we can do.

Now, that's one of
those lessons that

My father taught me.

Whenever you're
gonna have problems,

Hit 'em head on.

Be facing 'em.

Know they're coming.

Deal with it.

But this is gonna help
with what I need tonight.

I'm pretty sure my dad
will be quite proud of

What I've accomplished out here.

Bottom line is is I wouldn't
have been able to do this

If it hadn't been for
a lot of his teachings.

I don't wanna work
too much harder today,

But we are getting
what we need done done.

'cause getting up in
the middle of the night

And running for water,

Praying your shelter
doesn't burn down sucks.

♪ ♪

[tense music]

♪ ♪

- [sniffs]

♪ happy birthday to you ♪

♪ happy birth... ♪

Today is my son's
fifth birthday.

♪ Happy birth... ♪

And today, I am
not home with him.

♪ Dear nikolai ♪

♪ happy birthday to you ♪

[clapping]

Five years old today, nikolai.

Five years old, wow!

God, five!

Man, oh, man.

Dad made you some toys.

I made you some tops.

See that?

I made you a slinky worm.

Whoa.

I made you ball and a cup.

Oh. Oh, ooh.

Oh, I made it! You see that?

[laughs] that's
pretty cool, huh?

That's neat, right?

I hope you've had just

The best birthday
you could today.

Hopefully, you get
a bunch of icing,

As many pieces of
cake as you want.

And hopefully,
you get a big toy.

And you get to play all day.

But you do that anyways.

[soft somber music]

♪ ♪

I've been dreading this day.

♪ ♪

He doesn't know why I'm gone.
He doesn't know why I'm here.

♪ ♪

Last night, I wrote a happy
birthday letter to nikolai.

It was sad too.

It reminded me of my childhood

And my biological father.

He went to prison when I was two

For something that you
can't be forgiven for.

He'd always send letters

Saying how much he missed us.

And at a certain
point, you know,

Now I'm 10 years old,

Missing's going out the window.

He was never there.

[sniffs]

He was never gonna be there.

I love you.

And I miss you.

I don't wanna be that
dad, always be away.

I'll be home before
you know it, I promise.

♪ ♪

I wanna hear you say "I
love you, daddy," in person.

♪ ♪

But I can't quit.

I have way too much
riding on this.

$500,000, mikey.

If I wanna have time
to be there with him,

I gotta keep going.

You're everything to me, son.

You'll never just
how much you mean.

'cause there's no possible
way of explaining it.

[sniffles]

Happy birthday.

God, please, let
me win this soon.

Let me go home to my family.

Today has been so hard.

Guess I'm gon' get
up and go out here

And try to get some food.

♪ ♪

Oh, please, god, let there
be a grouse out here.

♪ ♪

I ain't got no rats.

I ain't got no grouse.

The only things I have right now

Are solitude and thoughts.

All I know, it's [bleep] cold.

Just wish everybody
would hurry up and quit

So I can go home.

Surely, they're missing
their family too.

Everybody's got their
reasons for being here.

I just hope their reasons
aren't as strong as mine.

♪ ♪

God, don't let me
have come this far

To be taken out of this.

I can't quit.

I have way too much
riding on this.

$500,000, mikey.

That's why you're here.

♪ ♪

I gotta keep going.

[dramatic music]

- The fun times are over here.

I don't feel great right now.

My body is close to the end,

But at any second,

One of my competitors
could tap out.

♪ ♪

- This is whole place has
turned into a frozen hell.

There's ice on my
tarp on the inside.

- I've been cold,

But this place,

This is a whole new
element to cold.

It's just more difficult
to stay positive

When you're in the shelter
so much, not sleeping.

[shouts] get outta here!

- [shudders] can't
put my boots on.

[bleep] damn.

- We got a fire going on here.

[water splashing]

♪ ♪