03x05 - It's All In The Wrist

[bunniefuu]

Wake up the masses!

Assume the crash position.

Hold on tight!

Take a deep breath...

For a cartoon crama-ganza!

Iiiiit's...

Kablam!

Where cartoons and comics collide.

Now to take you inside and turn the pages,

Here are your hosts, henry and june.

And u.s. Department of education

Howdy, kablam-skateers.

I'm henry, and this would be my co-host, june.

♪ Ba-da-ba-da-ba-da- ba-da-ba-da-ba-da ♪

Ok, june, the dancing part of the show is over.

Can't help it, hen-rod. I just got happy feet.

♪ Ba-da-da-da-da da-da-da-da-doo ♪

June, america is waiting for the show to start.

Ok.

How's that, america?

I extend my most sincere apologies.

♪ Ba-ba-ba, la-la-la-la, da-da-da, da-da ♪

June, the writers spend hours preparing the script,

And the production crew works really hard

To put the show together,

And now you're just blowing them all off.

How do you think they feel?

[Upbeat music plays]

[Ding]

What can I say?

The rhythm is gonna get ya.

And so are sniz and fondue.

Ha ha. I will take this and sell it on

The mobile chair black market.

Ha ha ha ha ha.

Help! Stop! Wheelchair thief!

Hoo hoo hoo ha ha ha ha.

Ha ha ha!

Hey, fondue-ski.

Check out my new hose attachment.

The water wizard.

No other nozzle harnesses the power

Of h* with such intensity,

And clarity of purpose.

Whatever, fruit nut.

A clean home is a happy.

[Water spraying]

[Glass shattering]

Hey, fondue. Betcha I can fill

Old lady shnoffman's bird bath from back here.

Ready?

Aim.

Water!

Whoa-oa-oa-oa!

Gasp!

Sniz!

Look what you've done!

Oh, the badness!

The water wizard is too mighty.

Sniz. Regard!

It cannot be. He--he can walk!

It's a miracle!

Sniz, the water wizard healed him.

"Pardonnay?"

Heal me. Heal me!

Ok. But what's wrong with you?

Everything. Hot flashes, anodonia,

Munchhausen by proxy, hypochondria--

Fondue-ski?

It worked! I'm completely healed.

Teeeeeeee!

Sniz. This nozzle is a great gift.

We must exercise its curing power wisely.

Hold him, fonzer.

Hang on, pepe.

I'll cure that nasty ich forever.

[Doorbell rings]

I'll get it.

Hello! Who is it?

Morning, madam. It's the blind man.

Sniz. A blind man.

Dirty drapes dragging you down?

Why not consider the venetian alternative.

Blind man?

Can you see?

Wiggling how many finger digits?

Ahh!

[Engine starting]

[Tires squealing]

Roots, alive!

Not only can he see, but he can operate a motor vehicle.

Look, fondue. He left behind his special wood.

We could put it over our windows,

For privacy and to block out the light.

Later, sniz. Your gift is too precious

To keep to ourselves.

Right now, we're going to heal the world!

Ladies and sick people,

Your suffering is over!

Behold, the wondrous...

Water wizard!

[Oohs and ahs]

Who's first?

Step right up.

One squirt'll do ya.

Uh, I'd like to have my arm healed, please.

You got it, fella.

Aaaahhhhh!

Could you do something about

My male pattern baldness?

[Coughing]

But this isn't what I meant.

The hose will heal you all!

Everybody feel better!

It's nothin' but a garden hose with a fancy nozzle!

They're fakes!

Charlatans!

My arm hurts!

Let's get 'em.

[All hollering]

After 'em! Yes! Yeah!

Now, now, let's not do anything radical.

I'm done with the healing game.

Me, too.

Bunch of ingrates.

But at least we got these cool mobile chairs!

Race you down the hill, fondue-ster.

Hooooooo!

If you thought that last cartoon was

Kablam-a-lama- ding-dong delicious,

Well, friend, you are not alone.

In fact, in a blind taste test,

Out of finicky tv viewers prefer kablam!

To show how we got our results,

Henry will take the kablam!challenge.

Are you ready, sir?

We're good to go here, june.

Then let the challenge begin.

What will henry like more?

Kablam!...

Or a leading, name brand soft drink?

Hee hee hee.

This one tingles.

[Sniffing]

Mmmm. Glassy good.

[Slurp]

Mmmm.

Just a little hint of citrus.

Nice.

No doubt about it.

This is the taste

That will keep me coming back for more.

Well, what do you know. Kablam!

And no unpleasant aftertaste.

Just like action league now!

Announcer: dateline-- refrigerator museum of art,

Where a fiendish art thief has been stealing paintings

Right out from under their magnets.

Action league. Thank goodness you're here.

If anything happens to this timmy original

We'll have to cancel our big opening tomorrow.

Don't worry, sir.

The action league is on it.

It's an honor to guard such a brilliant painting.

I love timmy's use of color to redefine space.

I like the shoes.

They're purple!

Aw, what do you philistines know about art?

Hey, look! Thundergirl copied timmy!

This I gotta see.

That forgery gets an "f".

Art happened to be my best subject in school.

Ha! Right.

Excu-uu-se me.

[Alarm sounds]

Ahhhh!

Whoopsies!

Today's episode...

We find our heroes

Getting dressed down for messing up.

Blast it! If we don't get that painting back

Before the big opening,

We'll be in more trouble

Than a rembrandt on a roller coaster!

Time for plan b.

Moments later,

The g*ng stows away inside a sculpture

By the renowned artist, terra cotta.

Ouch! Your flipper's in my face!

Well, your hair's in my mouth!

Excuse me, chief, but how is this

Going to get that painting back?

When the art thief steals this priceless work,

He'll unwittingly take us to my techer.

Now make room!

Ow! Ouch! My nose!

Later that evening, the league's operation

Is threatened by an unforeseen development.

Hey, guys? I gotta take an action tinkle.

Hold it in!

Oh, great. No!don't you dare.

Shhh. Someone's coming.

Oh, joy. It's terra cotta's

Masterpiece kitty!

I must have it for my collection.

Ha ha!

Whoa! Hey !i'm getting seasick!

Eeewwwww! Gross![Vomiting]

Ouchies! I bit my tongue!

Slippery little devil, aren't you?

Ouchies!my spine!

I can't feel my legs!

Next stop, my personal art collection.

All: ow!

It's just not my night.

Later, in an art lover's lair...

Is anyone still alive?

No.

Anyone seen my legs?

Thundergirl: the painting. I can see my techer

On that table over there.

The finest art in the world is now mine!

And no one can look at it but me!

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Think again, mayor.

Action league, awa-aahhhh!

All: ow!

What's this?

My priceless work full of action jerks?

Freeze, mayor.

You're under arrest!

Hold it right there!

One more step,

And this masterpiece is master pieces.

Blimey! He's holding my techerover a paper shredder!

Can our heroes dissuade his dishonor

From dismembering dis painting?

Find out at the action- shattered conclusion of...

Go wake your grammy! There's more kablammy!

Still to come...

Prometheus and bob,

Life with loopy,

And when we return,

More action league now!

Right here on kablam!

A painting jacked,

A trojan cat cracked.

Withmy techer teetering on

The brink of tatters...

One clean shot, chief.

One clean shot is all I need.

Ok, but don't miss.

The entire art world is depending on you.

Ha ha ha. You don't have the guts!

This painting's worth millions.

Make that thousands.

Uh, try pennies.

Third time's the charm.

Uh-oh.

Ahhhhh!

Yes, it hurts.

Blast it! That painting's more shredded

Than a box of shredded wheat in a shredder!

What are we gonna do now?

Later that day...

Chief, I can't thank you enough

For taking such good care of my techer.

Aw, it was nothing. Really.

Well, thundergirl.

I guess we owe you an apology.

Your painting saved our hides.

I like the way thundergirl uses color to redefine space.

[Sniffing] mmmm. Snackers.

Thanks, guys.

It is pretty good, isn't it?

I love weenies.

Oopsies!

The end.

Action league now!

U.s.d.a. Certified action, just like--

[Spooky music plays]

[Ah-ooooo-ga]

[Scratching]

Admit it. You thought henry was a goner there.

That's because of the mood- altering power of...

The music sting.

Thanks, mr. Soundman.

In the world of filmed entertainment,

The music sting is used to punctuate

The emotions of a scene.

We call that one "the pants-wetter,"

And I think you can see why.

[Wah-wah-wah-wah-waaaaah]

Ah. Cheeky trumpets.

That's the sting that tells you

That henry's done something embarrassing.

[Ding]

[Ding]

It's orange soda, ok?

Jerks.

[Blues harmonica plays]

Uh-oh. That heartbroke delta bluesman

Is the sting that tells us

Henry's in one of his moods.

Nice work, mr. Sound guy.

[Spooky music plays]

The pants-wetter does it again.

It's iced tea, ok?

This is my favorite music sting of all,

The one that tells us it's time for

Prometheus and bob.

, Years ago,

An alien videotaped his attempts to educate a caveman.

The prometheus and bob tapes.

Tape ...

Eh?

[Talking robotically]

[Robotic sounds]

Eh.

Ow!

[Confused] eh! Eh? Eh!

[Robotic noises]

Hey! Hey! Hey!

[Scolding]

[Chattering]

[Scolding]

[Struggling noises]

[Speaking in calmer tones]

[Crunch]

[Hollering in pain]

[Grunting inquisitively]

[Robotic noises]

[Chattering]

[Chattering]

[Yelling]

Hey-ey-ey-ey!

[Bob groaning]

[Yelling]

[Happy noises]

[Chattering]

[Yelling angrily]

Welcome back, kablamigos.

Be with you in uno momento.

On your mark, get set, slap!

Ow!

[Dance music plays]

That's it. I quit.

I don't get it. I practice and practice,

But I can never beat you.

Don't be so hard on yourself, hankski.

You win some, you--

Well, actually, you never win some.

I must be doing something wrong.

I know, I'll study the game film,

Just like my hero,

Clyde "the glide" drexler would do.

Danny, can you re-rack that one, please?

Danny, let's not and say we did.

You cheated!

Ok, ok, I'm sorry, henry.

I absolutely swear

On a stack of comics

I'll never do it again.

The days are getting shorter,

The nights are getting colder.

Time to put away the baseball bat

And get out the galoshes.

Yep, winter's on the way, folks,

And no one's more bummed out about it

Than my sister, loopy.

Humph!

Winter's gonna be a big, frozen flop.

You can't have any fun when there isn't any sun.

Those guys have the right idea.

They're flying south for the winter.

Some ducks have all the luck.

What's with you, fella?

Why aren't you heading for the tropics

With the rest of your fancy feathered friends?

'Cause I'm a canadian wingless duck, that's why.

Every winter those guys fly south,

And I'm stuck here by myself.

Sounds like you wanna get away

Just as bad as I do.

Wait. Just 'cause we haven't got any wings

Doesn't mean we can't fly.

Come with me, duck. I've got an idea.

By the way, my name's mike.

How's it going, eh?

My name's loopeesha,

But you can call me loopy.

Welcome to fly by night travel.

How may I help you?

We wanna fly south for the winter.

Super. How about this?

Days in jamaica,

Including hotel, limousine, and air fare.

Only $, per person.

Sounds good, eh?

I've got bucks.

Oh, I see.

Well, in that case...

Pilot: we hope you enjoyed flying with us today.

On behalf of everyone at vertigo airlines,

We'd like to say...

Bombs away!

Loopy: whooo-hooo!

Mike: sun city, here we come.

Last one to the beach is a sack of seaweed.

[Crash]

Oh, nice goin', eh?

I thought we were flying south for the winter.

We did, mike.

We just flew a little too far south.

This is the south pole,

Aw, I should have known

This would have happened.

Life's a poke in the eye for a guy who can't fly.

Now, cut it out, you two.

Loopy: penguins!

That's right, penguins.

Flightless birds who live

In sub-zero temperatures

Every gosh-darn day of the year,

And you don't hear us complaining about it.

Right, g*ng?

[All squawking happily]

Like I always say,

If life gives you ice,

Go ice-skating.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Last one there's a frozen fish stick.

[Laughing]

Well, guys,

I've had the wildest winter week ever,

But I'd better be getting home now.

Hey, mike, are you coming?

Hey--hey-- uh, loopy?

You know, I've been thinking.

Maybe I'll stick around a little longer.

After all, somebody's gotta teach these webheads

How to fire a slap shot.

Right, team?

[All squawking]

So loopy caught a ride on a passing fishing boat,

And was home before the first snowflake hit the ground.

Anybody for some halibut?

Ever since she's been back,

Loopy sure has changed her tune about winter.

[Teeth chattering]

As for the rest of us, well...

We're looking forward to an early spring.

Welcome back.

You've seen the tv show,

You've considered buying the t-shirt,

Now check out kablam!the game.

Let's give it a trial run.

Wow! Kids are gonna love this!

They sure are.

Hey! This isn't what we talked about

At the game concept meeting.

It works for me.

June, this is ridiculous.

Kablam!the game should be like

Kablam!the show.

When you're right, you're right, henry.

I'm going to settle this problem, pronto.

Around here, when I say, "jump,"

People say, "how high?"

Ahhhh!

[Grrrrrr]

Ahhhhh!

Perfect.

Now it's just like the show.

Game over, kablamers. See you next time.

Join us again next time.

Samekablam! Time,