01x10 - Love Sick

[bunniefuu]

Hey, Nick, have you seen Kevin?

I wanna trade him my tuna fish sandwich
for his tuna fish sandwich.

What's the difference?
They're both tuna fish.

I sat on mine.

I'll tell him it's grilled.

He's at a pep squad meeting
getting ready for the game on Saturday.

He's really gotten into it.

Kevin? He's a rocker.

He would never get into
something that corny.

[whistle blows]

Attention, Horace Mantis Academy!

Come show your Mantis pride
by coming to the big game this Saturday!

[all cheering]

♪ We got the moves all over you ♪

-♪ It's almost unfair ♪
-♪ Surrender to the Mantis ♪

♪ You haven't got a prayer ♪

-♪ Go, Mantis! ♪
-[cheering]

Wow, you were right.
Talk about corny.

Wonder why he's gotten
so into this cheerleading thing.

[all laughing]

I just wish I had longer arms.

Nick, I'm surprised at you.
Where's your school spirit?

Hey, girls, wait up.

♪ Surrender to the Mantis
Something, something, something! ♪

-[theme music playing]
-♪ Yeah! ♪

♪ Hey! ♪

♪ I was sitting at home ♪

♪ Watching TV all alone ♪

♪ So tired of routines ♪

♪ The day goes on and on ♪

♪ So I pick up the phone ♪

♪ Call everyone I know ♪

♪ I say there's gonna be a party ♪

♪ Hit the music, here we go, yeah ♪

♪ You gotta live to party
Bust your move ♪

♪ Everybody's in the groove ♪

♪ Tell the DJ to play our song ♪

♪ Are you ready to rock and roll? ♪

♪ Gotta live to party
Bust your move ♪

♪ Everybody's in the groove ♪

♪ Live to ♪

♪ Party! ♪

-[rock music plays]
-♪ I make up one more lame excuse ♪

♪ Why I can't come out tonight ♪

♪ I'm not trying to cut you loose ♪

♪ I just need some time... ♪

[vocalizes]

♪ I'm feeling lovesick, but I don't mind ♪

♪ You're the one I think about ♪

♪ It's every day, it's every night ♪

♪ Oh, call the doctor ♪

♪ I'm lovesick ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ I'm lovesick ♪

♪ Going back here for so long ♪

♪ And you're getting over ♪

♪ Waiting on me to be strong ♪

♪ And you start to wonder ♪

[vocalizing]

♪ I'm feeling lovesick, but I don't mind ♪

♪ You're the one I think about ♪

♪ It's every day, it's every night ♪

♪ Oh, call the doctor ♪

♪ I'm lovesick ♪

♪ Whoo! ♪

♪ You're the one I think about ♪

♪ It's every day, it's every night ♪

♪ Oh, call a doctor ♪

♪ I'm lovesick ♪

♪ Yaowww! ♪

Whoo! You guys,
that sounded so awesome.

-OK, wardrobe's all set.
-That's great.

Everything is gonna be perfect
for Saturday morning.

I think it is so cool that you guys
are performing on Great Morning USA,

live from right here in the firehouse.

I know, and Dad said there's gonna be
a million people watching

all at the same time.

That has to be a huge TV.

Yep.

[gasps]
What is this?

You guys got invited to
Jacques Le Fejette's spring preview?

He's, like, my fashion designing idol.

Please tell me you're going,
please tell me you're going,

and tell me your taking me with you.

Who wants to see a bunch of dudes

who look like they haven't slept in months
stumble down a runway?

No, thank you.

Guys, um, this is the spring preview
for women's fashions.

That means there's gonna be,

like, 50 of the most beautiful women
in the world there.

-I'm there.
-Yeah, who said I wasn't going?

I've always been interested
in women's fashion...

since about three seconds ago.

-When is it?
-Tuesday, 6:00 p.m.

Oh, can't go. That's the day
I mix the final tracks for the record.

It's the only day
we could lock in the studio. Sorry.

-It's OK.
-I can't go either.

We have cheerleading practice
on the trampolines.

-Oh, wait, can't you go anyway because--
-Trampolines.

Well, it looks like
it's just you and me.

Do you wanna grab a bite
or something before?

-Cool.
-Bye.

-Bye.
-Pretty exciting, Joe.

Your first data with Stella.

Aw, we're really happy
for you two crazy kids.

It's not a date. We're all going
to the fashion show together,

except you guys are not coming.

Yeah, sure, not a date with Stella...
alone together.

Stella only sees me as a friend, OK?

Hey, Joe. OK, since we're going
to the fashion show as a couple,

we probably don't wanna clash.

So, don't wear anything
darker than royal blue

or anything lighter than,
like, a sky blue.

In fact, just stay the heck
away from blue.

Stella, I just remembered
I can't make it that night.

-Oh, why not?
-I... gotta trim my eyebrows.

You know, these caterpillars
can get out of control.

Yeah, I understand.

Um, well, I was looking forward to it.

-You were?
-Yeah.

I mean, to seeing all those fashions.

Wow. Um... but we're still having
lunch together tomorrow, right?

Absolutely.

Great.
It's a date.

No, it's not.

I heard you and Joe
are going on your first date.

Congratulations.

Joe and I are not dating.
You know that.

We're just really, really good friends.

I mean, besides, Joe's a big rock star.

He can see any girl that he wants to.

Stella, for someone who's so smart,
sometimes you don't even know

what you don't know, you know.

I know I have no idea
what you're talking about.

-You know?
-You are all in your head.

Get out of there.
When it comes to romance,

-you need to follow your heart.
-Please.

The only thing your heart
has ever followed is a Jonas.

[exclaims]
I protest.

Oh, I... I admit, I used to be
a smidge obsessed, but I have matured.

Hi, Macy.
I was wondering about...

Well, thinking about asking you...

Would you like to go
to the basketball game with me Saturday?

I mean, if you want.

[sighs]

I would love to, Randolph.

Meet me here at 6:00, OK?

Great.
Will you excuse me for a second?

I've gotta go tell everyone in the world.

Carl, Steve, Steve's brother...

Mm...

I'm impressed.
You have matured.

Thank you.

[exclaims]
Hey, look.

There's a stain on the floor
in the shape of Nick's face.

That is not an obsession.
That is a fact.

Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Step around the stain.

Around.

Hey, Joe.
Lunch today?

I got an extra peanut butter,
mushroom, sardine, salami sandwich

-with your name on it.
-[sneezes]

-Oh...
-And now it's disgusting.

I think I'm coming down with something.

-Got a case of the love bug, Joe?
-I'm not dating Stella, OK?

Didn't you see how I canceled
on her about the fashion show?

Whatever.
Let's just go get some lunch.

Oh, I can't.
I've got lunch with Stella, so...

Kevin, me and Stella have been best buds
since, like, we were in kindergarten, OK?

We have a tight friendship.
I don't wanna mess it up.

I mean, would I like to go
on a real date with Stella?

Of course, I would, but...

Let's just pretend like I didn't say that.

Too late.
You just did.

I think it's time Dr. Kevin
teaches you a lesson.

-OK.
-Jonas and Stella are a happy family.

But what if one of these
smiley faces felt a certain way

about another one of these smiley faces,
and that same smiley face

didn't feel the same way
as that other smiley face?

There'd be no more happy family.

Only a sad family,
singing sad songs,

in sad clothes, to sad fans.

Sad, sad, sad, very sad indeed.

This is not washable, Kevin.

I know.
That's why I have this.

I'm not dumb, you know.

[locker closes]

Hi, Randolph.
I got you a present.

It's for you to wear on our date.
Stella made it for Nick of Jonas,

but I think you'd look really great in it.

Wow, thanks!

And I also got you a cool, uh...

-Hat.
-Uh, this is a wig.

No, it's a hat.
Try it on.

And I think I'd like
to give you a little nickname.

"Randolph" just sounds so formal.

Oh, well, my mom calls me "Ran."

Oh, isn't that sweet?
I'm gonna call you Nick.

-Nick?
-Nick like "nickname."

It's a joke.
[chuckles]

-Our own little private joke.
-Anything for you, Macy.

Oh... See you game night, Nick.

Oh, and don't take off that hat, Nick.

Bye, Nick.

Stella.

-Oh, hey.
-Hey, I can't do lunch today.

-Why not?
-I have to put reinforcements

-in all my loose-leaf holes.
-Yeah, right. OK.

-Well, how about tomorrow?
-I can't.

-Wednesday?
-Mm-mm.

-Thursday?
-Sorry.

Oh, OK.

You know what?
No, not OK, Joe.

I mean, if I didn't know
that we were just friends,

I'd assume you were
sending me some kind of a message.

-What message?
-Oh, I don't know.

Usually when someone
cancels on me twice in a row

and then three more times in a row,

I kind of assume
I'm not that person's favorite person.

Stella, wait.

Come with me to the big game on Saturday.

-What?
-Come with me.

I can get courtside seats.
My brother's a cheerleader.

OK, that sounds really great.
Go, Mantises.

Awesome, we're on.
It's a da-ate.

It's... we're on.

I can't believe you're gonna miss
our school's basketball championship.

Where is your school spirit?

[drumline plays]

That was it.

Joe, are you almost ready?
Stella's gonna be here any minute.

I have to be there early
before the pep rally.

[sighs]
My cold's gotten worse.

I don't wanna disappoint Stella again.

She was really hurt last time.

Hey, Joe, I heard you had a cold,

and you're going out
to some basketball game tonight?

This doctor prescribes
a little, "No way, Jose."

-[laughs]
-Oh, thank you.

-Not you, the book.
-Come on, Dad.

You're singing on
Great Morning USA tomorrow morning.

Millions of TVs are gonna
be tuned into Jonas.

Oh, now I get it.

-Can't afford to push it.
-I'm fine. [sneezes]

Don't make me sic Mom on you.

You don't want her coming at you
with Grandma's thermometer.

[sighs]

Hey!
So, what do you think?

Just something I threw on in,
like, six hours.

Stella, I can't go.
I'm sick.

No, Joe, you're wrong.
You're more than sick.

-You're about to be dead.
-I'm sorry.

Look, Joe, if you just don't wanna
hang out with me anymore,

that's totally... that's fine.

I'll still be your stylist.

I just wish you wouldn't feed me
one excuse after another, you know?

Just have some respect for me.

I don't understand.

Do you want me to draw you
some more smiley faces?

Stella's more mad at me than ever.

Will somebody please tell me what to do?
Kevin.

-[scoffs] Forget it. Nick?
-Well--

Never mind. Kevin.
Wait, Nick's right.

I should take Stella to the game.
Thanks, Nick.

-All I said was, "Well."
-Yeah, but I knew what you were thinking.

You and me.

Joe, if you sing bad tomorrow,
it'll make the band look bad.

Plus, you can't just disobey Dad like that
just because you hurt somebody's feelings.

It's not someone.
It's Stella.

-Why'd you give him that idea?
-All I said was, "Well."

Well, yeah. All I said was...

So, technically, you're more to blame.

All I said was, "Well."

-Stella. Stella, wait.
-What, Joe?

I'm sorry.

Do you still wanna go to the game with me?

I thought you were sick.

Sick. What gave you that idea?
[sneezes]

I always sneeze
before the big games.

-It's good luck.
-You're weird.

-But in a cute way, right?
-Barely.

Come on, let's go.

Go, Mantises!

-[crowd cheering]
-[fight song playing]

[whistle blows]

Go, Praying Mantises!

[coughs]

-Ooh, are you OK?
-Oh, I'm fine. I'm fine.

Kick their butt...
[coughs]

Mm-hmm.
He said kick their butts!

-Whoo!
-[coughs] Thanks.

Hi, guys.
Can me and Nick steal these seats?

Hey, Macy.
Um, that's not... that's not Nick.

That's Randolph dressed as Nick.

I meant Nick, like, nickname Nick.

Come on, Nick.
Let's go get some nachos.

[coughs]

Hey, um, I'm really glad we're doing this.

It was kind of weird there for a while.

-It was like you were trying to avoid me.
-Avoid you? How could I avoid you?

I mean, we go to school together.
We work together.

Yeah...
[chuckles]

-[coughing]
-[cheering]

-That was awesome.
-Did you see that?

Yeah, I know, I just... Still,
you were making it pretty impossible

-to keep a date--
-This is not one of those.

-One of what?
-[whistle blows]

[cheering]

-You mean a date?
-We're not doing that.

What is wrong with you?

Nothing. I'm just trying to protect
an important friendship.

-Oh!
-Huh?

You know, we're not on
one of those things that people go on...

Those... things.

-You mean like a date.
-[grunts]

-A date.
-[speaking gibberish]

Joe, you are being ridiculous.

I mean, it's like
you have a problem with us dat--

-[groans]
-Dating!

-But we're not.
-Yeah, I know.

I realize that. I'm just saying

it seems like you would
have a problem with it

if we were, which we are not.

Right.

Well, if being alone with me
is so traumatic for you,

don't worry about it
because it's never gonna happen again.

Stella. Stella, wait. Stel...
[coughs]

-Hey.
-What are you doing here?

Thought I'd listen to Kevin's advice,
have a little more school spirit.

The only reason I don't
come to these games is because

I never meet anyone like myself.

Nachos?

I'll see you at home.

-[coughs]
-[cheering]

Joe, you gotta hurry up and get changed.

The Great Morning USA crew's
gonna be here early.

-[raspy] Stella hates me.
-What has happened to your voice?

You can't sing with that voice.

This band is about to perform on live TV

and that TV show is not called
Only OK Morning USA.

And it's not called
Pretty Good Morning USA.

It's called Great Morning USA,

which means we have to be
great to even be on it.

Dad was right.
You shoulda never gone out last night.

-He's gonna k*ll you.
-He'll have to get in line behind Stella.

-[Dad] Children!
-[Kevin yells]

It's Dad. He can't find out
that Joe lost his voice.

-He'll freak out!
-Quick, into the bathroom.

Uh, no, I'm good.
I already went.

No, take Joe in there and hide.

The Great Morning USA crew's on their way.
Is everybody ready?

Joe, you ready?

Uh, we were just deciding
what he's gonna wear.

-Are you wearing pajamas, Joe?
-Of course he's not gonna wear pajamas.

Well... he's still wearing pajamas.
Those are your pajamas, aren't they, Joe?

You know, he decided
he's gonna wear his gray suit.

Grey suit. Grey suit. Gray suit is good.
Million people watching.

All right, guys, look,
Great Morning USA

is the biggest morning show
in the country, all right,

so we gotta be sharp.

That's why I'm riding you
so hard about your look.

-Uh, Dad.
-Yeah.

What, do you think I forgot
to put my pants on?

[chuckles] Let me tell you something...
Oh, I'm freaking out!

Joe, you have to keep your voice down
to the last possible second.

Absolutely no talking whatsoever.

Joe, we have to talk.

I mean, what is going on between us?

You're my best and closest guy friend.

-And lately you have just been acting--
-Really weird.

Whoa, what happened to your voice?

I'll help translate. He said,
[raspy] "Really weird."

-Exactly.
-Exactly.

Right, well, you have been
acting really weird.

And why, just because the two of us
have been going out together?

-We're not going out.
-He said, [raspy] "We're not going out."

[groans]
I know. I realize that. I'm sorry.

I didn't mean "going out" going out.
I meant going out.

Joe and Stella. Stella and Joe.
Best friends since forever.

She said, [high-pitched]
"We're not, 'going out' going out.

We've just been, like,
best friends since, like, forever."

Sorry. I kind of got caught up
in the whole translating thing.

I'm pretty good at it, huh?

Joe, you and I have been best buds
since we were little kids.

I mean, we have such a tight friendship,
and I don't wanna risk messing that up.

Would I like to go on
a real date with you? Of course!

Um...
Let's pretend I didn't just say that.

Kevin, I'm suddenly very hungry.

I'm gonna go upstairs to the snack bar
and get something to eat, Kevin.

Would you like to join me, Kevin?

You two crazy kids gonna be OK without me?

-Just go!
-[Joe] Go!

[Kevin] He said...
[raspy] "Go!"

Um, let's... let's suppose...

Let's suppose that I possibly feel
a certain way about you.

Is it possible you possibly feel
the same way about me?

Oh, OK, now let's say
we possibly started dating.

That would be a bad, bad idea, right?

I mean, maybe it would be
the best thing that ever happened to us,

but what if it wasn't?

I mean, would it be worth risking
all that if it ended badly?

No, no, no, it wouldn't.

I mean, maybe we have feelings
and maybe we don't,

but this band and our friendship
is too valuable to risk losing.

We can't go down this road, huh?

Thanks for talking this
through with me, Joe.

[knocking on door]

It's the Great Morning USA crew!

They're early!
Hide him, hide him.

Hi, welcome.
This way.

OK, yeah, right on up those stairs.

-What about my voice?
-We're doomed.

He sounds terrible.

I don't know.
I think he sounds... kind of hot.

-Hey, Kevin.
-Already ahead of you, bro.

I'll make it.

-♪ I'm feeling lovesick ♪
-♪ Lovesick ♪

♪ But I don't mind, no ♪

-♪ I'm feeling lovesick ♪
-♪ Lovesick ♪

♪ But I don't mind, no ♪

[grunts]

♪ You're the one that I think about ♪

-♪ Every day and every night now ♪
-♪ Call a doctor ♪

-♪ I'm feeling lovesick ♪
-Why is Joe singing like that?

-♪ Lovesick ♪
-What's wrong with him?

♪ But I don't mind, no... ♪

-He's a little lovesick.
-♪ But I don't care ♪

-♪ I'm feeling lovesick ♪
-♪ Lovesick ♪

-♪ But I don't mind, no ♪
-♪ Don't mind, no ♪

♪ 'Cause you're the one
that I think about ♪

-♪ Every day and every night now ♪
-♪ Yeah ♪

-♪ Yeah! ♪
-[coughs]

-♪ Ooh! ♪
-♪ Lovesick ♪

♪ Lovesick ♪

♪ Love is so sick ♪

♪ Lovesick love ♪

♪ Loving you is sick ♪

♪ Oh, it's so good ♪

♪ Oh, lovesick, lovesick ♪

♪ OK, I'm sick ♪

Hey!

Why does romance have to be so hard?

Aww!

Well, excuse me.
I have no idea what you're talking about.

My love life is rockin'

-with a touch of rollin'.
-Well, good.

-Macy.
-Oh, hi, Nick.

I'm sorry. It's just not gonna
work out between us.

Here's your Nick outfit, your Nick hat,

and your Nick instruction manual
you left for me.

If you see me in class,
just call me Randolph

or Randy or Edgar,
really anything but Nick.

Aw, Mace.
I'm sorry.

[sighs]
It's for the best.

I just can't see being with someone
who isn't comfortable being them self.