02x20 - Cuter Than Cute/Pampered Pussycat

[bunniefuu]

[snoring] [clock ringing]

[upbeat music]

[cheerful music]

[Garfield] Here, send this to Abu Dhabi

and do not handle with care.

[Jon] I'm sorry.

Garfield, how many times do I have to tell you?

You can't mail Nermal to Abu Dhabi.

[gasping]

He wouldn't fit in the fax machine.

Besides, Nermal is so cute.

[groaning]

[dramatic music]

[purring]

In fact, Nermal's just the cutest thing on the entire planet.

And I'm so glad he's going to be staying with us for the entire month.

[terrified screaming]

[dramatic music]

Face it, Garfield.

In the reality-based world, I am the pinnacle of cute.

And the cute ones rule.

I have to stay here and see this.

What I can't figure out is why any of you watch

when he's on the show.

Doctors work day and night to get rid of horrible diseases.

When will someone find a cure for Nermal?

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music continues]

In fact, Nermal's just the cutest thing

on the entire planet.

I'm so glad he's going to be staying with us for the entire month.

You are monitoring our dread enemy,

the orange cat, General?

Yes, and I believe we will soon find his weakness.

He seems to hate that which is "cute."

We must find his weakness.

His ability to devour our people

is all that prevents us from finally conquering his planet.

The secret may lie in this line

our spy monitors just captured.

[Nermal purring]

In fact, Nermal's just the cutest thing on the entire planet.

This "Nermal" has a dire effect on the orange one.

That is the key.

Send in Spumoni.

[teleportation sound]

[extremely deep voice] You sent for me, General?

I did.

It is time to program the transformation our scientists have engineered.

Step into the molecular restabilizer...

This will change him into an even cuter version

of the Nermal species,

so he can infiltrate the orange one's home.

[laser loading and launching]

It will be my honor to go on this mission,

the better to gain...

[shrill voice] ...information that will enable

my beloved planet of Parma

to conquer the Earth.

Brilliant.

Like this, he will find out how to defeat the orange one.

I can use the molecular restabilizer

to transport him to Earth

and later to bring him back, as well.

[teleportation sound]

-[fingers snap] -[keys beeping]

[ray sound]

[eerie music]

[teleportation sound]

[extremely deep voice] I have successfully...

[clearing throat]

[deep voice] I...

[shrill voice] ...have successfully arrived on Earth.

I shall gain entrance to the home

of the orange large creature. -[knocking]

[dramatic music]

[Jon] Who could that be? I'm not expecting anyone.

[cute meowing]

Oh!

[cute meowing]

Oh, you poor little adorable kitten.

You look abandoned and hungry.

[cute meowing]

Don't worry, I'll feed you.

And boy, you sure are cute.

[purring]

-[ominous music] -[evil laughter]

What? Another cute kitten?

Hasn't Nermal made me sick enough?

I know you don't like this, Garfield, but he's so cute.

In fact, he's even cuter than Nermal.

-[Garfield groans] -[Odie barks]

What do we need another disgustingly cute...

"Cuter than Nermal?"

Ah, this could be,

shall we say, interesting. [malicious giggling]

-[happy humming] -[xylophone steps]

You seem pretty confident of yourself, Nermal.

And why shouldn't I be?

After all, I am the cutest kitten in the world.

Uh-uh...

Uh?

Meet our newest guest.

What did you say your name was?

Spumoni.

You think this kitten's cuter than me?

No way.

I mean, he's cute...

But I'm CUTE!

Jon sure thinks so.

Here's a ball of yarn for our cute little friend to play with.

What?

[Jon giggling playfully]

-[Odie moans lovingly] -[Jon] Oh...

Oh, that's so adorable.

I've got to call Liz.

Nice try, fella.

I'll show you cute with a capital "C."

[dropping sound]

[purring]

You've got to see him, Liz.

Cutest kitten you ever saw.

-[Liz chatting] -[Nermal] Meow...

[purring]

Nermal, aren't you a little old to be acting like that?

No, I can't bring him over right now.

I think Aunt Ivy's dropping by for a visit.

[doorbell]

-Aunt Ivy? Haaa! -[chattering teeth]

I see this dump hasn't changed one bit...

You still have that obese cat.

And that flea-bitten mutt...

[worried gasp]

I don't know who this is, but I don't like him, either.

And this little one is...

is...

Is adorable!

Why, you're just the sweetest, cutest,

most precious kitten in the world, aren't you?

Even Aunt Ivy likes him.

And she doesn't like anything.

-[doorbell] -Excuse me.

I'm a total stranger.

I was just passing by and I somehow had a feeling

that you had the cutest kitten in the world.

And I can see I was right.

Did I just hear someone say something about the cutest kitten in the world?

[purring]

Me! Me!

Don't you people know cute when you see it?

-[doorbell] -[Eddie] One side,

formerly-cutest kitten.

I want to see the new champ.

[shriek of exasperation]

[all] Oh...

It can be hard to accept reality.

[sigh] Well...

It was nice being adorable... while it lasted.

[chatter]

-He's just adorable. -I love him.

[device ringing]

-[device ringing] -[chatter continues]

Excuse me a second, admirers...

[Eddie] Oh, he's so cute...

[chatter continues]

[device ringing]

[deep voice] No, exalted leader.

I have not found the orange one's weakness yet.

And I will not.

What do you mean, "you will not?"

These people, they think I am adorable.

But Spumoni, you are my fiercest warrior.

Yes, but all my life, I wanted to be cute.

They love me, I will not betray them!

Farewell.

Spumoni, this is an outrage!

[Odie barks]

You're not a cute kitten.

True.

I really look like...

this!

[cute voice] But I would rather look like this.

I dunno, somehow, you look cuter to me when you look like lasagna.

[groaning]

Use the molecular reclamation ray!

Bring him back here at once!

[general] Yes, your leadership!

Please don't expose me!

Or eat me!

[ray sound]

-[teleportation sound] -[Garfield] Haaa!

The reclamation of Spumoni is completed, your leadership!

You are in big trouble, Spumoni.

[teleportation sound]

We are in big trouble!

Our dread enemy!

-[screaming] -[general] Run!

The monster is in our midst!

[dramatic music]

Boy, I'll never get home from here!

[screaming]

Haaaaa!

[heavy steps]

[dramatic music]

[screaming]

[Garfield laughs]

-Ha! -[chattering teeth]

Please! Do not devour us.

If I don't, will you send me home and never bother us again?

Anything! Anything you ask!

[begging] Please!

Ok, you've got yourself a deal, fella.

[dropping sound]

[clanging]

[lasagna people] Hail to the King!

[teleportation sound]

Everyone left, Garfield.

That cute kitten just disappeared on us.

Do you have any idea where he went?

Uh...

nope.

Is it true?

Is he gone?

Gone, apparently for good.

Then that means,

I'm numero uno again!

Yes! Cutest kitty cat in the whole wide world!

Yeah, we're all thrilled for you.

Yeah, you'll never know what it's like, Garfield.

Having everyone like you and admire you...

It's just the greatest feeling in the entire universe!

[deep voice] I know what you mean, Nermal.

I know what you mean.

[dramatic music]

There will be a sequel!

And we will have our revenge!

[upbeat music]

[snoring] [clock ringing]

[upbeat music]

[Odie howls and cries]

Now calm down, Odie.

It's just a little shot!

[Odie whines]

What's the matter?

Afraid of a shot, scaredy-pup?

Show a little bravery, why don't you?

[Liz] All done!

[Odie cries]

See? Now, that wasn't so bad.

But he was so terrified.

So frightened.

What a big baby.

Say, while Garfield's here, we might as well give him his shot.

Another good idea, save a trip back here, just give me my...

[stuttering] shot?

[moans]

[Odie laughs]

[dramatic music]

Garfield, come back here!

[intriguing music]

[Garfield moans]

My word!

What is that ghastly noise?

All done.

Get me an attorney!

Get me an attorney named Murray!

Call the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Me! Call...

All done?

That wasn't so bad.

Excuse me.

Who is the veterinarian?

I am. How can I help you?

Oh, you can't help me.

[laughs] I'm Mrs. Van Gelt,

and I'm so frightfully rich, I don't need any need help.

But you can help poor Prince Orloff here.

Hello, Prince Orloff.

What seems to be wrong with him?

He coughed.

Twice, I'm afraid.

Quick! Get an ambulance.

[Odie laughs]

Prince Orloff's regular physician is away.

I'm counting on you to cure my precious widdle baby dumpling.

Mrs. Van Gelt,

I can already tell there's nothing wrong

with your precious widdle baby dumpling,

except he needs to exercise.

What?

This is my cat, Garfield.

He doesn't just sit around the house all day.

He tries to.

Well, I wouldn't want any cat of mine

to turn out like...

like that.

A cat needs to run and play.

I'll have you know Prince Orloff's delicate paws

do not touch ground.

[Odie and Garfield giggling]

[Liz] Well, maybe it's time they did.

Well, I can see you're not the proper physician for Prince Orloff.

Come, Daws!

Let us take Prince Orloff home and put him to bed.

Yes, Madam.

Can you imagine a cat living like that?

Being carried everywhere and waited on all the time?

Yeah... I'm working on it.

Oh, I think I need to get home.

[Mrs. Van Gelt] Is Prince Orloff comfortable, Daws?

[butler] I placed him gently on the rear seat.

[relieved cry]

I'm...

I'm standing!

I'm not on one of those silly pillows.

And now...

Oh, look at me, I'm walking!

I am!

I'm walking.

Oh, mother!

If only you could see me.

I'm actually doing something for myself!

[bionic sound effects]

[Garfield] You know, Odester, it sure would be great to have a life like that.

Servants waiting on you,

bringing you food whenever you're hungry...

Here's your lunch, Garfield.

Oh, and I washed and fluffed the cushions in your bed.

Yeah, wouldn't it be nice to have someone wait on you all the time?

No! It's awful!

[Odie mutters]

Oh, you feel so helpless,

always dependent on someone else...

What are you doing off your pillow?

I couldn't take any more of being waited on like that.

I don't ever want to live in a mansion again!

Although... I am kind of hungry.

What do they feed you there?

Well, last night we had lobster Thermidor aux crevettes,

with a Mornay sauce and raspberry tiramisu.

[Odie panting ]

Here, try some of this.

It's better.

[angel chorus]

That's... wow!

That's the greatest food I've ever had in my life.

What's it called?

It's a rare imported delicacy we call...

lasagna.

Here, I have eight more coming out.

Oh... [eating sounds]

Oh, my goodness!

So, what do you do for fun?

For... fun?

I thought so.

Come on, I'll show you what the word means.

[Odie mutters]

[lively music]

[joyful music]

Weee! Let's do that again!

[Prince Orloff laughing]

Weee!

Wow! Harder, Odie!

Push me harder!

[dropping sound]

You're supposed to watch him every minute!

I'm sorry, Mrs. Van Gelt.

I should call the police.

[recorded message] Your call is important to us.

Tell them to search everywhere!

[voice breaking] My precious dumpling can't be alone for one second!

Oh, this is wonderful.

She never let me watch...

What do you call this again?

Television.

Oh, she never let me watch television before.

What is this wonderful program I'm enjoying so?

That's called a deodorant commercial.

Oh!

I'll have to try that if I ever sweat.

[Jon] I'm going out, see you later, Garfield.

See you later, Odie.

See you later, Prince Orloff.

[happy humming]

[screech] Prince Orloff!

[Jon screams]

[stuttering] That woman who owns him is probably frantic!

Hello, Liz?

Remember that cat, in your clinic? The one on the pillow?

He's what, Jon? At your house?

What is Prince Orloff doing at your house?

Quick! Give us the address!

-[police sirens] -[dramatic music]

Huh? [laughing]

[Garfield] I'll take you to Vito's

and introduce you to the wonders of pepperoni and mushroom pizza.

[laughing] Oh, I'm having so much fun, Garfield!

-I'm never going back to that mansion. -[police sirens]

[tires screeching]

[dramatic music]

[Odie mutters]

For some reason, I think you are.

[desperate] Never!

[dramatic music]

[policeman] Stop! We have to bring you back!

Stop him!

Bring my widdle baby back to me!

[action music]

I'll bet he's going back to the park!

Come on, Odie!

We can take a shortcut!

[Odie barks]

My baby!

[panting] Why has my baby run away from me like this?

-Ha! -[crash]

[upbeat music]

-[neighing] -[galloping]

Garfield? Odie?

Anybody?

I think they're heading for the park!

[police siren]

[upbeat music continues]

Oh, this is even more fun than watching deodorant commercials!

[policeman] Oh, he's up there!

[overlapping chatter]

Prince Orloff!

You come down from that tree right this minute!

[laughing] I climbed a tree!

Look, I actually went out on the limb!

[giggling]

Madame, there's something off about Prince Orloff.

He looks... different.

He does.

Something about his face.

I don't know what it is.

A smile?

Why? Why yes, that's it!

-He's smiling! -I've never seen him smile before.

[laughing]

Could he possibly be...

happy?

That would be my prescription for your cat, Mrs. Van Gelt.

A little less pampering,

a little more life.

[intriguing music]

[gasp]

[crack]

Weeeeeee!

Hey, sergeant,

how do we write up a report on this?

We don't.

The Chief would never believe it.

-[Prince laughing] -We were right.

He is smiling.

Oh, my little prince.

We have to make sure you get some fun in your life

and you don't just sit on a pillow all day.

Weeeeee!

[Odie mutters]

[Garfield sighs]

Well, Garfield.

Looks like you helped rescue your friend from living in a mansion,

being waited on and never getting to get out and live.

Yeah, I bet you'd hate a life like that, wouldn't you, Garfield?

[dreamy chuckle]

[delighted chuckle]

I said, I bet you'd hate a life like that, wouldn't you, Garfield?

I'm thinking it over!

[Odie laughs]

[upbeat music]