01x44 - For Pete's Sake

[bunniefuu]

Ah-hyuck!

♪ H-h-h-hit it ♪

♪ Like father, like son ♪

♪ You're always number one ♪

-Yes!
-Yes!

♪ There's buddies, there's pals ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ You always seem
To work things out ♪

♪ Can't you see
You're two of a kind ♪

♪ Lookin' for a real good time ♪

♪ A real good time ♪

Aah!

♪ Report to the Goof Troop ♪

♪ And we'll always stick together ♪

♪ Always stick together ♪

♪ We're the Goof Troop ♪

♪ The best of friends forever ♪

♪ Side by side wherever we go ♪

♪ We're always ready to roll ♪

♪ Now gimme a beat ♪

♪ We're the Goof Troop ♪

♪ And we always stick together ♪

Gawrsh!

♪ We're the Goof Troop ♪

♪ The best of friends forever ♪

♪ Now we're calling everyone ♪

♪ Come along and join the fun ♪

♪ Report to the Goof Troop ♪

♪ Baa ba doo da bop baa ba doo bop ♪

Yeah!

-[crash]
-Don't like the sound of that.

Not my Swiss Army
hedge clipper!

-[bell ringing]
-Cuckoo! Cuckoo! Cu-ckoo!

[coughs]

Oh, it's gonna cost me
a fortune to replace.

[crash]

No, it's gonna cost
the Goof a fortune.

He'll think he did it
and buy me a new one.

Sometimes I'm so rotten,
I give me goose bumps.

[humming tune]

Gawrsh! Petey's Swiss Army
hedge clipper.

He's gonna be awful upset about this.

And it's all my fault.

Least I can do
is write my pal a letter

telling how sorry I am.

Dear Pete...
How many rs in "Pete"?

Ah-hyuck! I'll write it sloppy
so the spellin' won't show.

[snaps]

Pencil ran out of gas.

The rest of them are...
Unleaded. Hyuck!

Some of these magazine letters
ought to do the trick.

[humming tune]

"I'm going to get ya
a new hedge clipper.

Sorry, Goofy."
Ah-hyuck!

Now, that's what I call a pretty
sorry-lookin' letter.

Ah-hyuck!
But then, I'm pretty sorry.

Well, now what you need's
a new car.

This old heap's fallin' apart.

How much can I get for it
on trade-in?

Well, let's see.

Adjustin' for inflation,
deflation, pilferization,

confutation, and vegetation,
I'd say about...

[bell dings]

two cents.

I can't believe it!

This car is mine
for only $1,000?

Yep. Guess that's why
they call me pushover Pete.

[car backfiring]

[car backfiring]

[tires squeal]

[cash register dings]

Bye!

Sucker.
[laughing]

Another dissatisfied customer.

Hope Petey doesn't see me.

I can't face him knowing how I ruined
his hedge clipper.

Better not be the better
business bureau again!

[reading aloud]

Get me?
Must be some kind of joke.

Who'd want to get me?
Ha ha ha!

Only every customer
I ever sold a car to.

Hello... get me the police.

[horn honking]

Well, Pete, 99 out of 100 times,
it's nothin'.

Whew! That's what I figured.

Then again, there's
that hundredth time.

There is?

Reminds me of my first case.

It was a used car salesman.

-Like me?
-No.

This guy was crooked,
ripped off his customers.

You're nothin' like that.

No, not exactly.

He received a letter...
Like this.

Then strange things
started happening.

He heard squeaky footsteps
wherever he went.

He saw suspicious shadows
on the walls.

He felt the presence of eyes
always watching over him.

And then, one day, poof!
He disappeared.

-Poo... oof?
-Poof.

Here's his picture
when I found him 10 years later.

Oh, no.
Why, it's horrible!

Oh, sorry.

That's a picture of bowl
of chili that won first prize

at the policemen's
chili cook-off.

This is another bowl of chili.

No, that's him.

[gasps]

Who would do such a thing?

Often it's someone
close to the victim...

The wife, son, daughter, uncle, grocery
box boy, foreign diplomat...

But I don't want to wind up
like... Chili!

Calm down.
There's a 75% chance it's nothin'.

But you said it was
a 99% chance before.


You say "tomahto,"
I say "tomato."

I'm afraid
it's the perp's next move.

Until then,
just sit tight, relax,

maybe consider bumping up
your life insurance policy.

-What?
-I often find

that humor alleviates
a tense situation.

No silly letter's
gonna spook me.

I got nerves of steel.

Why, I can eat Brussels sprouts
without even blinkin'.

-[phone rings]
-[cries out]

Probably wrong number anyway.

Better make sure
it's all there, Maxie.

Shears, chain saw,
ax, hammer...

-Cuckoo! Cuckoo!
-Cuckoo clock.

I'll I gotta do is follow
these instructions,

and Petey will have him
a brand-new hedge clipper.

Let's see.
"Insert a and b, and v and o,

-and I and e, except after c."
-[horn honks]

Ah-hyuck!
Sounds simple.

Nothin' to worry about.
Everythin's just fine.

Gonna be clear...

[Max] Pop, did you feel something?

Ow!

I wonder if that was him.

Nice to take
a different way home,

for variety's sake.

I've been wantin' to see
this part of town anyway.

Uh, yeah...

I've been wantin' to see
this part of town, too.

-[crashing, cat yowls]
-Aah!

[cries out]

[owl hoots]

Uh, been dyin' to see
this part of town, too.

Don't mean that literally,
of course.

It's true what they say...

A guy can spend
a lifetime in a town

and never see the sights.

-[meow]
-Aah!

Always wanted
to see the sewer.

Plus, nobody can find me...

Not that anyone's after me.
Uh-uh.

[loud groan]

Just an echo,
that's all.

[nervous chuckle]

Always had
a hyperactive imagination.

He's after me!
He's gonna get me!

Whaaaoo! Ohhh! Ohhhohhh!

[squeaking]

[hammering]

[Peg] What are you doing,
bunny feet?

Oh, nothing,
poodle lips.

Just a little
redecoratin'.

Now, be brutal.
What do ya think?

Yaaaahhh! Haaa! Haa! Haaa!

Petey, you're not
dressed for work.

Not goin'.
It's a holiday...

-What holiday?
-People named Felix day.

Wouldn't want
to offend Felix.

Daddy, daddy, daddy! Aren't you gonna give
us a ride to school today?

School?

Wouldn't you rather
stay home today, pumpkin?

-You mean it?
-No school?

Pete?

Come on, Peg-ums.

What's one day of school?

I hardly ever get
to see my kids.

It'll give us a chance to get to know get
to know one another.

-You wanna get to know us?
-He doesn't feel hot.

Just get up here
on daddy's lap, and we'll...

Rap.

So, uh...

-You go to school, huh?
-Kinda.

So, uh... you're in what,
third grade? Fourth?

-Sixth.
-Sixth grade?

Peg, did you hear that?
Our son's in the sixth grade!

So, p*stol, honey...

Kindergarten.

-Peg...
-[Peg] I know.

That's great! Sixth grade
and kindergarten.

It's 'cause you're different ages.
What do ya know?

[chuckles] Uh, are we done getting
to know each other, Dad?

Uh, think I'll walk
to school. Bye.

-Me, too!
-Glad we had this chat, dad.

We gotta do it again real soon.

So, Peg...

I don't go to school.

[laughing]
I know that.

[knocking]

Someone's at the door.
Wonder who it is.

Well, you know, if you open it,
we might find out.

-Aah!
-Aah!

[shouting]

Whew. Close one.

[Goofy] "Dear, Petey.

Your surprise is
going to come any day."

There.
This'll let Petey know

I haven't forgot about
his hedge clipper.

Petey, you're fogging up
the window again.

There's a little guy
across the street

just staring at our house.

He hasn't budged
in over an hour.

-Pete, that's a lawn jockey.
-Oh.

Well, you can't be
too careful.

Are you sure everything's OK,
froggy feet?

Sure.

Things couldn't
be better.

See?

OK.

Pull yourself together.

B-B-But the k*ller...

He can't get you here.

Doesn't even know
where you live.

That's right. If I never leave home
for the rest of my life,

I got nothin' to worry about.

[buzzer]

Probably just a bill

or a letter
from Ed McMahon.

Yeah that's it.

Good old Ed.
Good to hear from him.

"Your surprise is going
to come any day."

He found me!
What are we gonna do?

What do you mean "we"?
I'm outta here! h* hoo!

You still awake, hamster lips?

[trigger clicks]

By drivet! What makes you think
anything's wrong?

[tapping]

Eyyaaaaah!

[g*nsh*t]

[babbling]

Pete, I think it's time you
switched to a decaffeinated coffee.

Now, just sit back
and watch some TV.

It'll take your mind off
of whatever's bothering you.

Yeah, TV.
Watch TV. TV good.

I'll go fix you a snack.

[woman] There you are, darling... some
warm milk to help you sleep.

[man] Oh, thank you, darling.

[gulping]

This milk tastes peculiar,

like almonds and...

Oh, no!
I've been poisoned!

[choking]

[woman] I told you it would
help you sleep... forever!

[cackling]

There you are, dear...

Some warm milk
to help you sleep.

Often it's someone
close to the victim...

The wife, son,
daughter, uncle...

[Pete] Noooooo!

I gotta pull myself together.

Peg loves me.
She'd never hurt me.

Then again, what do I really know
about her anyway?

He heard squeaky footsteps
wherever he went.

PJ?

[Police detective]
He saw shadows on the walls.

p*stol? Of course.

[gasps]

He felt the presence of eyes
always watching him.

Stop that!

Chainsaw? The k*ller?

Never did trust that mutt.

Never knew
she could write.

Pete-ums!
Petey-pie!

Oh, please open the door.

Can't do it, Peg...
If that's your real name.

What do you mean,
if that's my real name?

Is dad going flako, mom?

Oh, of course not.

He's just been under
a lot of pressure lately.

Just the same, I think we better
hide all the sharp objects.

I can't trust anyone.

They're all acting weird.

I'll get Goof to protect me.
I can trust him.

He's too stupid
to hurt me.

[bell dings]

Better wait until dark.

And he's had himself locked up
in our bedroom all day.

I'm worried. This behavior
is strange, even for Pete.

Don't you worry none, Peg.
I'll talk to him.

And when I'm done, he'll be more his old
self than he was when he wasn't.

-Ah-hyuck!
-[crash]

Goof, good buddy, friend,
pal, chum...

Where are you?

Hmm, the lamebrain
must be out.

[Max] Mr. Pete's sure gonna be
surprised when he gets it, Dad.

Yeah. I can hardly wait
to see his face

when I let him have it.

[gasps]

I wouldn't have believed it

if I didn't hear it
with my own eyes.

It's true.
It's the Goof.

He's out to get me.

M-M-Magazine
and the letter

and the squeaky shoes!
Squeak! Squeak!

Take a deep breath
and slowly tell me what's wrong.

[inhales]

It's the Goof!

Oh, yes, Petey, I invited Goofy and Max
over for dinner.

Got a little surprise
for you, Pete.

I've been wanting to give you this
for quite a while.

[ticking]

It's ticking.
It's ticking.

Nooooo!

Whew!

Funny place to put
a hedge clipper.

Ah-hyuck!
Guess the surprise

must've got him
a little overexcited.

[chuckles]

Goofy, would you carve
the Turkey?

No, please don't!

Oh, yeah, y-y-you mean
that Turkey.

Heh heh heh.

Here, Petey.
Got a special piece just for you.

[stammers]
Uh, I'm not really hungry.

Aw, go ahead.
It's not gonna hurt ya.

Uh... yeah.

Here you go, girl.

That's right.
Eat it up. Yum-yum.

How do you feel?
Little queasy yet?

And you said
you weren't hungry.

Ah-hyuck!
Here. Have seconds.

Now, be sure and save room
for thirds. Ah-hyuck!

I'll be right back.

A-hyuck.

Where you going, Daddy?

Gotta change my shoelaces.

I hate it when they don't match.

I gotta make a run for it. Hop a freight
train. Take it to the high country.

Good thing I watched a lot of prison
movies. I saw this in a show once.

Mommy, why is Daddy hanging a bed sheet
out the window?

Eat your carrots, dear.

Eeeeiiiaaa!

I think my poor Pete-ums
has finally gone over the deep end.

Nope.
That was me, Peg.

Don't you worry none.

I'll track Petey down

and back him back safe and sound,
dead or alive.

After all, I still gotta give him his new
hedge clipper. Ah-hyuck!

Petey, are you there?

I got somethin' for ya!

You gotta catch me first.
Ha ha ha ha!

Ooh.

-[screams]
-[Goofy] Where are ya?

Aah!

[high voice]
One child's ticket, please.

He'll never find me
in here.

Petey, is that you?

[screaming]

You gotta help me!

Yeow!

Take me anywhere.
Anywhere!

Whoa!

Yeeiiooowww!

We'll be safe down here.

Just the two of us.
Yeah.

Just wait here till
the Goof moves away.

It can't be more than

That's OK
We got beans,

enough beans to last Petey
a lifetime.

They're mine...
All mine, I tell ya.

All mine!
Ha ha ha ha!

Blecch!

Shh! Someone's coming.

Don't say a word.

Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!

[Goofy] Gawrsh, Peg,
sounds like Pete.

[Peg] He must be
in the basement.

Et tu, chainsaw?

Man's best friend?
I knew you were in on this.

I got somethin'
for ya, Pete.

Well, I guess
this is it.

But if I gotta go,
I'll go like a man.

Please don't hurt me.
I take back every nasty thing

I ever said about you,
even though it was true.

I'll do anything! I'll wash your lawn!
I'll mow your car!

I'll rake your window!
Please don't k*ll me!

I'm too young to die!

Gawrsh, Petey,

you're really choked up
about this, aren't ya?

Don't choke me, too.
I... what's this?

It's your brand-new
Swiss army hedge clipper.

I've been trying
to give it to you all night.

What about...

This?

You sent it, didn't ya?

Sure did.
Oops! Bottom half's missin'.

What do you mean, oops,
bottom half's miss...

"I'm going to get you...
A new hedge clipper.

Sorry, Goofy."

Hedge clipper?
Ha ha ha!

Peggy, look, honey-bunny!

Goof got me a hedge clipper!
[giggles]

Uh-huh. That's...
That's very nice, dear.

Kids, look!
Whoopidy! Whoopidy!

Daddy has a hedge clipper!
Yada-yada! Hoodie-hoodie!

-Ha ha ha!
-Uh, cool, dad.

Yeah. Totally rad, Mr. P.

I hope it's not genetic.

-So everything's OK Now?
-[laughing]

I don't have to worry
about the chili!

Ha ha! No more shadows!

Peg, kids, I think
Petey wants to be alone

with his new hedge clipper.

Heh heh heh! Chili!

That's good.

Well, I... Wasn't really scared.

I... I... I could've beat up
anyone after me

with both hands
tied behind my back.

Mess with me, huh?
Just try it.

Why, I know karate, judo,

kung pao,
and moo goo gai pan.

I'll simonize their garfinkles!

♪ Gimme a beat ♪

Yeah!