Welcome to our World! Where we serve you cookies to ensure you get the best viewing experience on our site.

Did you know that you can remove censorship board-wide, use our advanced search functions, be notified when new content is posted, join our memberships, set episodes to show in any order you want & more if you are logged into your account?

Register or sign in here: ucp.php?mode=register

01x25 - Planet Leader (Part 2)

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Hulk and the Agents of S.M.A.S.H.". Aired: August 11, 2013 – June 28, 2015.*
Watch/Buy Merch Amazon


Told from the perspective of an online reality show created by Rick Jones to foster public acceptance of the Hulk as a hero and not a monster.

01x25 - Planet Leader (Part 2)

Post by bunniefuu »

Hey, Hulkies.

Well, things were really super-awesome.

Until they got really, really not at all awesome, fast, thanks to a certain long-headed freak, who framed us as criminals on Earth.

And then got us stranded on what seems to be Skaar's home.

This Skaar's home.

Welcome to Sakaar, Hulks, where I am the strongest one there is.

Couldn't take over Earth, so you settled for this primitive mudball? Sorry, Skaar.

This "mudball" will be your final resting place, my primitive green friend.

Sakaar has flourished under my rule, and when I tame the people of Earth, it too will know my grace.

And you will forever be remembered, as the monsters you are.

The only thing people are gonna remember about you, is that Hulk, the hero, kicked your big-headed butt on another planet.

Let's see if you're heroes on Sakaar, shall we? My subjects, I am sure you remember gentle Skaar, who so kindly watched out for your well-being? Skaar not enemy You not know Skaar.

Oh, my dear Skaar, have you forgotten, what did you did to these poor people? A shame.

We'll have to correct that.

Wait! Let me handle this.

Fear not, citizens! You all know how we deal with "the unruly".

Well, come and get me, Hulk! Hulk smash! Aah! If any of you need a reminder of how we deal with traitors, upstarts, and villains, allow me to indulge you.

Oh, terrific Don't people know I hate bugs? Personally, I've been waiting all morning to punch something.

Ditto, shulkie! Skaar hate stingy thing! Now your eight, gross bug-eyes see me.

And now they don't! Not here for your entertainment! Well, they survived! I suppose we could let them go, but I recommend we punish them some more.

By throwing them in the pit! Cheer if you agree with me.

I said "cheer!" He's got control chips on everybody.

Bingo! Aah! - Where are we? - The pit, duh.

Everybody, okay? Where's Jen? Jen? Jen? You fear for the girl? She's much better off than you are.

Move.

Hulk, this is nuts! We don't even know what galaxy we're in, and everyone back on Earth thinks we smashed Vista Verde and bailed.

We gotta get home, dude.

Can't break it to Rick, but I don't think we'll ever be able, to get people back home on our side.

Some things you just can't bounce back from.

Got a long way to go before clearing our names, Rick.

We can't leave until we free these people from Leader's control.

Ah, what is the matter with you? Is that control chip messin' with your head? No.

Just like back home, we help people whether they hate us or not.

Maybe Sakaar not want Hulk's help.

Yeah, well, it sure looks like these peeps could use it.

Skaar.

Uh, hey! We're the agents of S.

M.

A.

S.

H.

and it looks like we'll be doing a lot of smashing with you guys, huh? Whoever said humor is universal, obviously hasn't been to the sl*ve mines of Sakaar! You remember anything yet? Sure got these guys' attention.

Skaar remember Skaar did his job.

Oh, brother, that ain't good.

What in tarnation? It's the belly it swallows all.

None have returned.

Hey, zappy, what're we digging for? Aah! Now, get to work! If Leader already has these people under his control, then what's he need all these new chips for? Earth.

Isn't it beautiful? - Try it on.

- Ugh.

What happened? Oh, no, you don't! Where am I? Why, the palace, of course.

And my friends? They're safe.

As long as you behave My Queen.

Queen? Why you creepy little Aah! Don't flatter yourself.

"Collateral" and "insurance policy.

" Just didn't quite have the same ring to them as "Queen.

" But your part comes later.

For now, enjoy your new jewelry.

Fighting spiders? Digging ditches? Math? Whatever the boys are up to, it ain't as bad as wearing a tiara.

Skaar remember now.

People here hate Skaar for what Leader make Skaar do.

Like Korg.

He Skaar's enemy.

People here never help Hulks.

Just hate Hulks.

We've all been hated.

Can't change what Leader made you do, but you can change what they think of you.

Why are the guards taking a break? 'Bout time we got ourselves a shot, at the big, bad Skaar! Leader's enforcer is nothing now! Hey.

Everyone take it easy.

That's not who Skaar is anymore.

Can it, Greenie.

Want respect? Hit the biggest guy first! Nice work, Red, I think they're coming around! Gotcha, Skaar.

At last, our revenge! Into the belly with him! No! Aah! Skaar! Enough! When Leader finds out you destroyed his prized pets, you may find yourself in the belly with them.

How 'bout we see how tough you are, without your little shock stick? Betcha I could whip you with my pinky finger and a blindfold.

I better inform the Leader of the incident.

Aah.

That's the stuff.

Bring it! I'll be back for you.

I'll be counting the minutes.

You big red gorilla.

This is serious! We just lost Hulk and Skaar! For all we know, they could be Man up, Jones.

Greenie can take a neutron b*mb in the chest, you think a tumble down a well is gonna hurt him? Ah.

Good good point.

Trust me, I know what I'm doing.

These guys fear big, tall, and sandy over there.

Ooh, so we smash him with kindness? Eh.

Yeah, something like that.

But you know, we might just have to smash him the old-fashioned way.

Now, you get all camo'ed up and track down She-Hulk.

Time to bust outta this rock-factory.

Skaar, that you? Camera's finally good for something.

Skaar! Settle down.

It's me.

Skaar sorry.

Skaar thought Hulk was monster.

No sweat.

I'm used to it.

Hulk risk everything for Skaar.

No matter what everyone else thinks of us, we stick by each other.

Now let's go get the rest of our family.

Remind me to thank Korg for throwing us right to the exit.

No! Skaar save Hulk! Hulk Skaar only friend! Give Hulk back! Somebody get me a tissue.

Must've scared it off.

Or he not like taste of Hulk.

Leader's palace up there.

Better start jumping.

Got a long way to go.

Don't like being out in the open like this.

Remember any secret shortcuts? Skaar know that cave.

Lucky girl.

You are to be wed to the all-powerful Emperor.

Honey, he's lucky I haven't pounded his noggin back to normal size.

Shh.

Such talk.

We owe Leader a great debt.

He civilized us.

Gave us technology and energy.

Yeah, to control and enslave you! Get me one of these.

I think I know how to stop him, and get you your freedom.

Am I allowed in here? Absolutely not! You're okay! Where's Hulk? Uh, jury's still out on that one.

He's okay, though.

I think.

Now, come on.

Let's get out of here.

No, I can do more damage from in here.

Go find Hulk.

Yeesh, everyone's so bossy today.

Found Jen.

She's engaged.

How's it going down here? Engaged? To what? Eh, never mind.

I don't really care.

Bug-face here, Miek, says there's a rumor going around of a revolt.

What? You started that rumor.

It's called disinfo, genius.

I'll handle the guards.

You get Korg on our side.

All right, look dude.

You wanna dig up rocks, for the rest of your life, that's fine.

But me and the red guy got bigger plans than that.

So you got two choices.

Join us or get smashed! Or I guess there's a third option where you just hang out and watch while we We're with you, Blue.

Gotta distract the guards, so let's make it convincing, huh? Awesome oh, wait, right.

Unhand me, you fiend! Hey, break it up! Get 'em! Alley-oop! All right, tough guy, get ready to see red! Starting to make me.

Mad! Boo! Ooh, I got my spin punch workin'! Bam! Fellow sl*ves, these two warriors are on our side.

Today, we take back our freedom! What's the matter? Can't take a guy in a fair fight? Red fool.

Leader will destroy you all.

Let him try.

This'll control you no more.

Freedom! You have their support but Skaar will not be forgiven so easily.

The people will want revenge.

Using his subhuman intelligence and dumb luck, your cousin has escaped.

He'll come for you, and I'll be waiting.

Yeah, waiting to catch a smack-down.

Aah! You will learn your place, my Queen.

Skaar home.

Skaar see Leader make people forget.

Pictures make sure Skaar remember.

This Skaar's story.

Skaar was small and lived here alone.

A family found Skaar.

Skaar got strong and protected family.

Until one day Leader came.

And took Skaar away.

Made Skaar do bad things.

He turned you into a villain, just like he did us back home.

Earth might never accept us again, but we can set things right here.

Wrong.

You're doomed on both planets.

Why didn't you escape with your friend when you had the chance? Because your freedom is worth fighting for.

Welcome, my beloved citizens of Sakaar, to the climatic final battle! Two Hulks enter.

One Hulk leaves.

Shock me all you want, but we're not fighting.

Very well.

I'll just shock her instead.

Aah! Now, fight, or She-Hulk will be the first to fall! You caged me like an animal, Hulk.

From the moment you locked that cell, I planned my revenge.

It all comes down to this moment.

You tried to take over the planet.

Three meals a day and a cell was more than you deserved for the pain you caused.

Speaking of pain.

Get on with the show! Skaar let Hulk win to save She-Hulk.

No, we can find a way No other way! Skaar force Hulk to fight! I don't suppose you guys have an intergalactic airport around here, huh? Teleporter? Wormhole? Magic phone booth? There's one craft.

It belongs to Emperor Leader.

Yeah, we'll be hijacking that.

Arena must be right above us.

Shake a leg, Jones! Hit Skaar! What you waiting for? Come on! Yes, Hulk.

Fight back.

Let the beast loose and destroy your friend! Thank you.

Skaar make sacrifice to save friends! Hulk must win! You win them, we all win.

Will you finish him! No! Skaar sorry for all the bad Skaar did.

Boring.

Skaar should have fought back harder.

Skaar not make mistake again.

Skaar fight for people.

He's protecting us.

He defies the Leader? Let him go! Don't tell me this Neanderthal's sob story got to you.

I elevated you from slime! You squalid half-wits owe me everything! Guess I'll have to start all over again.

With Earth.

Got you a wedding present, my King.

Your public awaits.

People will always see the truth eventually.

And you will never see the obvious.

I'm always a step ahead! My ship is the only way off this planet, so even if you live, you'll still perish here in the end! No talk.

Time for smash! Impossible! Fall, you brute! What he said! No! No! No! Sakaar is free from you.

You want my practice planet? Keep it.

I've got all I need to take over the Earth.

Change of flight plan.

Each passenger only gets one carry-on, mountain head.

So you are gonna have to check these.

A-bombs away! Whoa aah! Not through yet! On three? Three.

Aah! I don't often admit this, but I was wrong.

No matter how bad it looks, you can always turn it around.

Maybe Earth will see us as heroes again, one day.

Thank you, Skaar and friends.

You have liberated us all.

We're done answering to a single leader.

This time, we rule as one.

Where'd he go? Leader? There's nowhere on this planet he can hide from us.

We will find Leader, and make him pay for his crimes! You know, he's probably worse off here than on Earth.

And I'm okay with that.

Can we get a move on? We have some serious work to do back home, remember? The whole "getting framed for wrecking our town" thing? Fine.

But I don't like it.

You better keep in touch.

Just in case.

Ready to head home? Leader's got this thing's coordinates set for Earth.

- Home! - Oh, yeah.

Yes, please.

Correction, it was set for Earth.

Hitch up your drawers, Hulkies.

We're outta here! Oh, I can taste the gamma burgers already.

They're on me.

And we'll be home just in time for dinner.

Whoa.

What was that? Uh-oh, navigation system just went south.

Then that means.

We're lost in space.

Don't worry.

We'll get home somehow.

No, we won't! We're lost in space! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger Hulk out.