01x02 - The Moonman

[bunniefuu]

[SIREN WAILING]

[♪♪♪]

BATMAN: Greetings, Bat-fans.

This is Batman.

And Robin, the Boy Wonder.

And me too, Bat-Mite.

Welcoming you to The New
Adventures of Batman.

Watch us wage our
never-ending battle

of good versus evil.

[♪♪♪]

ROBIN: Ride with us, as we
chase the greatest array

of villains the
world has ever seen,

proving that crime
does not pay.

BATMAN: Get set for
thrills and action.

Join me, Batman...

And me, Robin, the Boy Wonder.

And Batgirl.

And me too, Bat-Mite.

ROBIN: In the super
New Adventures of--

BATMAN: Batman.

[♪♪♪]

[SIREN WAILING]

[♪♪♪]

Hold it. Just put that back
and stay where you are.

Security, this is Ryan.

Red alert. Red alert.

[♪♪♪]

There he goes.

Security, we've spotted him.

He's trapped in the main hall.

Give it up, buddy.

There's no way out.

That's what you think. Look.

But that door weighs...



[SIRENS WAILING IN DISTANCE]

Keep away.

For Pete's sake, warn me
next time you stop that fast.

I didn't stop.

He's gone. And the chief's
never gonna believe this.

Can you blame him?

I don't believe it either.

d*ck: Five...four...three...

two...one...

ignition.

It works, Bruce.

It works.

[♪♪♪]

Liftoff.

Runaway rockets.
It's out of control.

Hey. How am I supposed to
take a nap with all this...?

I'm sorry, Scott.

I guess I forgot to read
all of the directions.

Everything's cool,
little buddy.

I needed something
to wake me up.

Ah. I must be the
sleepiest houseguest

you two guys ever had.

You're probably
still recovering

from your last mission.

Yeah. Being the first astronaut
to solo to the moon and back

has gotta take a
lot out of you.

Well, it was easy compared to
all these public appearances

I'm making now.

Ah, well, I guess being a
famous and handsome astronaut

has its drawbacks.

Now there's the Scott Rogers
I remember from college.

A swell guy

with a swelled head.

[LAUGHS]

Hey, listen, l have to run

to another speaking
engagement downtown,

but I'll see you
guys later tonight.

Sure thing.

Gosh, Bruce, they
sure keep Scott busy.

[BEEPING] He's
not the only one.

Look. d*ck: The Bat-Signal.

BRUCE: To the Batcave, d*ck.

[♪♪♪]

[BRAKES SCREECH]

A fluorescent felon
with magnetic mitts.

Sounds weird, commissioner.

What's even weirder is
that the only thing he took

from the entire museum

was this moon rock.

A moon rock?

The press is already calling
him The Mysterious Moonman.

Well, they're right about
one thing, Ms. Gordon:

he is mysterious.

We'll see how mysterious he
is once he's in handcuffs.

We have to catch
him first, Barbara.

We'll get the Batcomputer
working on it, commissioner.

[♪♪♪]

Busy, busy, busy, huh, guys?

Bat-Mite.

Listen. The Moonman's
right down my alley,

me being from
outer space myself.

So let's just erase
what you've done so far

and start over.

ROBIN: Oh, no,
you little squirt.

What did I do? What did I do?

Nothing yet. And that's
the way we wanna keep it.

Just sit tight,

and don't get too close.

[♪♪♪]

Aw, Bat-baloney.

SCOTT: In conclusion, I say
we are all space pioneers,

because we all share
the responsibility

of how we deal with
this newest frontier:

the moon.

[♪♪♪]

[CROWD CHATTERING]

Scott.

Are you all right?

Yeah. Thanks, Barbara.

I just got a little
clumsy for a minute.

You had me worried.

Aw, no sweat.

Just let me go freshen up,

and I'll be A-okay.

Uh, that's astronaut talk.

Roger.

[♪♪♪]

ROBIN: Holy
overeating, Batman.

We've fed the computer every
clue we have on the Moonman,

and it's still not enough.

Then we'll have to do our
own computing for a while.

Think, Robin. Why would anyone
with powers like the Moonman

walk through an entire museum

and only take one moon rock?

Maybe he's a goon for the moon.

You know, a real lunar loony.

[LAUGHS]

Bat-Mite, that's it.

You mean-- It is?

I mean, of course
it is. I guess.

Batman...suppose our thief
is nuts about moon objects.

Where would he strike next?

The new Moonride.

[♪♪♪]

Hey, wait for me.

What's the big i--? [BABBLING]

Hey, for bat sakes. Slow down!

Can you beat that?

They almost forgot me:

the most important member

of the Dynamic Trio.

[LAUGHS]

ANNOUNCER: Ladies and
gentlemen, boys and girls,

the Gotham City Fun
Park is proud to present

its newest attraction:

the astounding, the colossal

Moonride:

the only roller
coaster in the world

with rails of
actual moon metal.

Now, these lucky youngsters

get to be our very
first customers.

[♪♪♪]

[RIDERS SCREAMING]

BARBARA: Ready to go, Scott?

Scott?

[GASPS]

He's gone.

[♪♪♪]

Holy snail's pace, Batman.

We're still three miles
from the Fun Park.

Let's hope we get there before
the Moonman does, Robin.

Holy roller coasters.

We're too late.

There's only one thing to do.

Batgyros away.

Keep...

away.

Give her full throttle, Robin.

I'm giving it,
Batman, I'm giving it.

But the engine's
starting to overheat.

[♪♪♪]

His magnetism's
affecting my controls.

I shall return to the moon

what is the moon's.

She will not be robbed
of her resources

as Earth has been.

That dastardly
dude's getting away.

We'll have to forget
him for now, Boy Wonder.

Lives are at stake.

Don't worry, I'll stop him.

Oh, no, you don't,

you lunar loony.

Yipes!

[WHIMPERING]

[METAL SCREECHING]

[METAL SCREECHING]

[EXHALES]

[SIGHS]

Batman. There he goes.

BATMAN: See any
sign of him, Robin?

There!

[TIRES SQUEALING]

GIRL: I'm gonna hit you.

Holy traffic jams.

There's only one thing to do

in a sticky situation like this:

unstick it.

[CRASH]

BAT-MITE: Dynamic Duo.

Over here.

I was afraid of that.

The Moonman escaped.

[BEEPS]

Gordon here.

COMMISSIONER: Are you
at the amphitheater?

Yes, Dad. Why?

The Moonman's struck again,

this time at the Fun Park.

He's reported headed your way.

[GASPS] Ten-four.

I'll keep my eyes open.

[♪♪♪]

[GASPS]

Scott.

Where've you been?

I, uh...

went for a walk.

You know, to get
some fresh air.

What did you walk
on, your hands?

Huh?

Scott, a-are you sure
you're feeling all right?

Believe me, Barbara, I'm fine.

I'm a big boy, and I can
take care of myself, okay?

Okay, okay.

C-can I drive you home?

I know the way.

[♪♪♪]

BATMAN: Activate the
voice analyzer, Robin.

Activated, Batman.

But whose voice
are we analyzing?

The Moonman's.

What?

I managed to tape him
with my minicorder.

Far out.

Now let's see if our computer

can identify his voiceprint.

MOONMAN: I shall
return to the moon

what is the moon's.

She will not be robbed
of her resources

as Earth has been.

If Scott won't talk to me...

maybe he'll talk to...

Batgirl.

He shouldn't be too far ahead.

SCOTT: Something's
happening to me.

I don't know what it is.

But maybe talking about
it into this tape machine

will help me think it through.

I've never needed help
on anything before,

and there's no reason I can't
handle this by myself too.

[♪♪♪]

"Tough luck, Caped Crusader.

"The Moonman's voice
doesn't match any voiceprint

in our crime file."

But there's something
about that voice, Robin.

Something familiar.

[BUZZING]

Batgirl calling
Batman and Robin.

Batgirl. Zowee!

Let me talk to her.
Let me talk to her.

Go ahead, Batgirl.

I just located
Scott Rogers' car

on Canyon Road.

But he's gone.

I'm worried about him, Batman.

Listen to this tape I found.

SCOTT: Something's
happening to me.

I don't know what it is

but maybe talking about
it into this tape machine

will help me think it through.

Holy double identity.

The voice analyzer was still on,

and it's matched the
Moonman's voice...

with Scott's.

[RUMBLING]

Earthquake. Earthquake.

[GASPS]

Batman. Robin.

Are you still there?

Just barely.

That was some quake.

The Batcomputer reports
an unknown force

pulling the moon
from its orbit.

Unless it's stopped,

the resulting earthquakes
and tidal waves

will tear our world apart.

Holy catastrophes, Batman.

You don't think the Moonman--

I mean, Scott Rogers is...

That's exactly what
I think, Robin.

He's pulling his
biggest caper of all:

stealing the moon itself.

[RUMBLING]

We have to find Scott

and stop him...

before it's too late.

ROBIN: Batgirl, I think
we've located him.

Our magnetometer indicates
heavy magnetic radiation

coming from the
Gotham Observatory.

I'll meet you there.

[♪♪♪]

Batman... there he is.

BATMAN: He's using that
giant radio telescope

to focus his magnetic energy

and beam it at the moon.

Scott.

This is Batman.

Listen to me.

Hang on, Robin.

I can't control it.

Scott, no!

Please stop this.

You can't---

Batman, there's no
way to get near him.

Batman, I humbly suggest
we think of something...

and fast.

There's a tidal wave forming
beyond Gotham Harbor.

And a waterspout.

Robin, remember Scott
telling us about that comet

that shot past
his space capsule

when he was circling
the moon? Yeah.

My guess is that
comet exposed him

to some kind of radiation

that, combined with moonlight,

changes him into the Moonman.

If that's true, cutting
off his supply of moonlight

ought to restore him to normal.

But you can't just
turn off the moon.

BATMAN: Oh, yes, we can.

It's working.

What...? What
happened? Where am I?

BATMAN: Scott, you're the
only person who can save Earth

from total destruction.

You must return the
moon to its orbit.

But I...

I... I can't.

As the Moonman you can.

I'll help you.

BATMAN: What do
you say, Scott?

Time's running out.

SCOTT: Okay, Batman.

I'll try.

No.

I cannot return
the moon. What?

It must be set free

from Earth's influence.

Scott, think.

What good is it
to save the moon

if no one is left
to look at it?

You're about to
destroy the world.

But it is so hard,

and I'm so tired.

Don't give up.

You can do it.

ROBIN: The moon is
moving back again.

But the magnetometer shows
that Scott's powers are fading.

[SLOWLY] So tired.

No energy.

Just a little more, Scott.

He did it. And just as his
powers failed for good.

Congratulations, Scott.

That took a lot of courage.

I couldn't have done
it without your help.

How can I ever thank you all?

That's what friends are for.

I realize that...now.

As for the Moonman's crimes,

I'm sure Commissioner
Gordon will agree with me

that you have no worries.

BAT-MITE: Psst.

Is all the shaking and quaking

over with?

Huh? Huh?

Relax, Bat-Mite.

Everything's cool.

Well...that's good,

'cause I was
starting to get mad.

And when I get mad...

[RUMBLING] Earthquake.

Earthquake!

I think we've seen the last
of Bat-Mite for a while.

And the last of the
Moonman forever.

Amen.

[ALL LAUGH]

BATCOMPUTER: Bat Message.

We sure had some problems
with the Moonman tonight.

BATMAN: Problems that could
have been solved much sooner

if only Scott Rogers had
been willing to discuss

what was bothering him.

ROBIN: We all have
problems from time to time,

and it sure helps
to talk them out

with people we trust.

I've got a problem.

I can't swim.

Why is that a problem?

'Cause I can't
fix leaks either.

BATMAN: Oh, no.

[♪♪♪]