Andrea Gets a Divorce (2024)

[bunniefuu]

Oh Homeland, oh Homeland,

I love you so much,

Like a child its momma,

like a dog its owner.

What do you actually

celebrate on a birthday?

That you're a year older.

What's to celebrate about that?

That you didn't die that year.

That needs celebrating?

So who's coming?

Friends,

their wives, a couple of neighbors.

And you're paying all that?

Sure.

Might as well take out a loan.

You think it'll cost that much?

Depends.

Let's say...

...each man has four beers.

Four beers is way too little!

The heavier men drink 11, 12 beers.

12 beers?!

If the wive drives.

But women drink less.

OK.

Let's say 6 beers on average.

Plus other drinks.

And toast and sausages.

Toast or sausages.

5 a head.

About that.

For twenty people,

that's 700s.

It's only every ten years.

Andrea, I need to see a cow.

Kurt, that was over 130 km.

A calf is stuck in a cow! If I'm

not fast enough, they're both dead!

What if a car comes towards you?

I could see that far in advance!

You didn't see us.

That's 700s.

Are you nuts?

Pay my colleague.

You can't be serious?

This can't be true.

I went to school with her,

and she's acting like the SS.

It ain't easy...

having a woman as a boss, is it?

I'll get the change.

No time.

The grass needs cutting.

Sleep well.

When will you be home?

Dad, at my age I don't have

to say when I'll be home.

You still know how to

use your cell phone?

I don't need it anyway.

Come on, we'll try.

Well...

show me.

Press 1 and hold.

It automatically dials my number

What's that stupid ringing?

Your own personal ringtone.

Nonsense.

Hello?

Don't be childish.

You're standing next to me.

Bye.

Hi!

Hello!

Something to eat?

No, thanks.

Hey, that's pretty.

I think she wants to pick

up somebody tonight.

You think I'm overdressed?

No, not at all.

Hello! Aunt Andrea!

I do a wheel.

A wheel?

OK.

Watch out.

You used to be a wild dog,

your drinking in the bar was legendary

I've forgotten what's next.

You used to be a wild dog,

your drinking in the bar was legendary

today you stay at home with Lisa...

and your back hurts.

Five years ago, you were climbing

and going to the gym.

Today your shirt is stretched

over your belly,

and I'll tell you why:

you're getting older and older,

and your face is

more and more battered.

I know you don't want to,

but soon you'll be excited

for a spa voucher.

Drink your herbal tea,

take your pill,

and you'll need reading glasses

for every speeding ticket.

Oh, you crook!

Hi.

Hello!

Happy Birthday!

Thanks for having me.

All the best!

Sorry.

A soda lemon please.

And a small beer.

I'll take another pint.

Happy birthday, you crook.

Cheers!

Sit down, Andi.

No, I'm standing with my boys.

Come on.

It's okay.

Now it's our turn.

Bottoms up! Cheers!

We used to celebrate differently.

Do you remember how

we drank Grand Pr ix?

Horrible!

How does that work?

Everyone gets a shot.

You chug it, chug another, and another

and the last one who can still sit,

is the winner of the Grand Pr ix.

When do you start in St. Polten?

In August.

Do you like that more

than regular police work?

It's more exciting.

But also more dangerous.

You wanted to be detective

even back in school.

Andrea loves real criminals,

we're too harmless for her.

One more!

One more!

Cheers!

Andi, thanks,

but I won't drink that.

You serious?

That's too fast for me.

I have to do everything myself.

That's how adults do it.

Just like that.

Andrea.

Can we talk for a moment?

Just five minutes.

You're coming up?

No, we'll talk in the car.

What's wrong with him?

He hasn't talked to me.

Nothing at all?

Not a word

since I moved out of his place.

You don't have to drive away!

Sitting drunk behind the wheel

is an offence.

You're coming to arrest me?

Get in.

I don't have anywhere to go.

In private. Please.

Got a cigarette?

Buy some.

When did you start smoking again?

Only on special occasions.

Is today one?

How are you?

Good.

I get up in the morning,

make myself a coffee.

Then I make tea with milk for you.

And when I'm done with breakfast,

I pour the tea away.

Andrea,

I've thought about it.

We don't have to live

with my mother anymore.

We'll build a house.

And St. Polten is OK for me.

You can also work in Vienna later

if that's better for your career.

What do you think?

You got someone else, right?

Oh, Andi...

You can't promise everything now.

I won't drink another drop.

Give me another chance.

I made my decision.

Let's have an amicable divorce.

Please don't drive home like that.

Out!

Get out of the car.

And piss off to St. Polten!

Please don't drive drunk.

Don't boss me around anymore! Not you!

She has my key.

Andi, you can't drive anymore.

I'll drive you home.

Leave me alone!!

Wrong way!

Hop hop Hop!

Will you give this to Andi tomorrow?

Why?

He's walking.

Pauli, another one.

-My treat.

-No thanks.

Coming right up.

Come on!

I've had to blow for you three times,

so you could return the favor.

Really?

You need a man anyway.

Andi said it's a lot of work

to get you going.

I'd be great at that.

You're buying me this beer?

Sorry.

Can't you take a joke?

Be happy if anyone touches you at all!

Pity about the beer.

Dad.

What?

I told you I was going

to the birthday party.

I definitely told you that.

I'll be home soon.

Bye!

Andi

Can you hear me?

Someone ran over Andi.

No details yet.

The guy called an ambulance immediately.

What guy?

The driver who hit him.

I'll go there and call you.

I'll come with you.

Andrea, that's not a good idea.

What happened?

Nothing, Dad, go back to sleep.

No!

I was driving very slowly.

I used to be an alcoholic, you know.

I always drove slowly,

so the cops can't get me.

That's how I got used to driving slowly.

Please blow until I say stop.

More, more, more.

Stop!

0.0.

That's Neither.

I had him at school.

A teacher?

Have you used

any other intoxicating substances?

A cup of tea.

What kind of tea?

Black tea.

Nothing else?

With milk.

Andrea, my condolences.

How can this happen?

He says Andi lay

in the middle of the road.

That's what he claims.

I think he's telling the truth.

If someone's hit by a car when walking,

he gets thrown over the car.

But Andi was...

under the vehicle...

sh*t.

...trapped.

He must have been sick

and then he collapsed.

Thats bullshit what youre saying.

Andrea,

it's not Leicesters fault,

this could have happened to any of us.

It was an accident.

Especially behind at the hilltop,

you have no chance to brake.

Everything OK?

I want to go home.

We'll pick you up

for questioning tomorrow.

Morning.

Andrea, it's your day off.

You have so many bonus hours,

come back next week.

Have I said my condolences yet?

I don't know.

Sorry.

My condolences.

Thank you.

Now every birthday

I need to think of Andi's death.

And how many calves are dead?

Five,

actually four and one young bull.

What do you want me to write,

starved or died of thirst?

First you die of thirst,

its no different with animals.

How could this happen?

The farmer lives alone and got sick.

He was in bed for two weeks with fever

and didn't know what was happening.

The cows in the meadow survived,

but the calves in the barn...

I have to go.

Andrea.

My condolences.

-Thank you.

-Bye.

Mr. Bugler. One moment please.

We need to ask a few questions.

You were very sick.

Did you go to the doctor?

No!

Why not?

Because I was sick.

f*ck it.

Ill put a b*llet through my head.

Mr.

Bugler, do you have a g*n in the house?

A few,

I'm a hunter.

Please give them to us,

SO we're sure

you won't harm yourself.

Good.

And you have to come with us

to the medical officer.

Why?

Now I'm healthy again.

So he can look at you

and we're sure you aren't suicidal.

Just because I said

I am going to sh**t myself?

Yes.

Bloody nonsense.

He was a lovely guy.

And hard-working.

You can say that again.

I wouldn't have minded,

if it were someone else.

Specially that old

idiot who ran him down.

Andrea, why does that drunk

still have his driving license?

Who?

Neither of course.

He didn't drink.

That doesn't matter.

He drank himself stupid before;

I'd never let someone like that

behind the wheel, right?

Yeah, a car's a weapon, too.

Just like a revolver.

Will you give me another beer?

The ambulance guys said

he died quickly.

But that's no consolation,

at that age.

Right.

We are all to blame.

We shouldn't have let him

go home like that.

Ger ti, that's fate.

Nothing you can do about it.

At some point, it hits all of us.

At some point,

we'll all be pushing up the daisies.

That's how it is.

At least he doesn't need to worry about

anything anymore.

You're lucky if you only hit a deer

and not a wild boar.

I wasn't going that fast.

That's better.

On the main road someone died

because of a wild boar.

Must have been pretty heavy, your deer.

Half a stag.

Do you have used spare parts?

I'm afraid not.

But if you don't need a bill,

it won't be that expensive.

Isn't it far to your place?

I need the exercise.

Should I drive you home?

No thanks.

Pardon me.

Can I have a word with you?

It won't take long.

I don't have any milk.

I prefer it black anyway.

Do you teach music?

No, religion.

Can I have a look?

The coffee machine is so old,

sometimes there are flakes

from the sealing ring.

You can't drink that, sorry!

I have poppy seed cake

from the supermarket.

No thanks.

Why don't you buy

a new coffee machine?

It wouldn't be worth it for me.

I have something for you.

What's that?

An attorney.

From Rems an red Dona?

They make good wine there.

Give him a call, please?

I don't need any wine.

You may think a trial is fair.

But it's not.

They are looking for someone to blame.

And if there's one little thing

wrong with your car, you're in for it.

And that's right!

People like me shouldn't drive anymore.

From tomorrow,

the suitcase will be packed for prison.

You don't have to go to prison.

Yes, I do.

I want to atone.

What do you want?

It makes no sense.

For the two of us to talk.

When you're so nice to me,

I feel even worse.

Nice?

Why am I so nice?

I'm not nice at all!

I can't accept it.

This endless generosity.

You'd better count it.

I don't need to.

Youre pretty.

Thanks.

How long since we last saw each other?

A few years.

And... momma?

She died a few years ago.

No, you. Are you a momma yet?

No, not yet.

Then you'll have to hurry up.

See you.

The city center is great in the summer.

You can get everywhere quickly,

for skiing,

for the wine harvest in the Dachau,

and Vienna's not far.

You'll probably take

a service apartment in St. Polten?

I'll commute.

Ah, to be with your family.

With Dad

After a long night shift,

it's nice to lie down for a few hours.

I'm here all the time now.

Aren't you in Rems?

I've had a complicated time.

Nothing special.

Just normal.

At least, it's normal now.

Divorce.

But I see my son every weekend.

How old is he?

Seven, soon eight.

Excuse me.

I'd simply like to do homework

with him in the evenings.

And not just swimming on weekends.

The main thing is

you can see him regularly.

That's right.

Could I actually come earlier

than August?

Yes, I...

could make a provisional allocation,

so you could start

on the first of next month.

That would be...

That would be next week.

Is that too soon?

No.

Well, then.

To Andrea.

Welcome on board.

Cheers.

It's not an apartment,

it's a service apartment.

It's OK.

I like train stations.

Yes?

You get on the train at night

and wake up in Paris.

If you see it that way.

Hello.

Everything would have been different

if the Lord had given you children.

Friday was the last time I saw him.

In the afternoon.

He changed a halogen

lamp in the bathroom.

And I asked him

if he wants a cream cheese strudel.

But he said he doesn't eat sweet things right

now because his pants don't fit anymore.

He always loved pastries.

Even as a child.

He never wanted Pizza or Schnitzel,

and Ketchup he didn't like at all.

Curd Strudel, Curd Dumplings

he loved that.

Best of all.

Curd Dumplings with stewed plums.

You've become very thin.

You eating enough?

Yes.

Try some.

Great.

My condolences.

What are you guys doing back here?

Hello Max,

it's time for the g*n check.

Everything registered.

We still have to take a look.

And why didn't you call first?

That's the point, its unannounced.

You realize I know

the district commander?

You still have to open up.

I don't have time now.

It's a shitty area.

The women are moving away,

and the men are getting weirder.

Neither, for example.

He called me yesterday.

And he was so drunk,

I could hardly understand him.

You know what he asked?

Whether you get

a prison uniform in Austria.

He saw an American movie like that.

And he's already packed

his suitcase for prison

and he didn't want

to take too much with him.

He's really gone out of his mind.

Poor devil.

Really, poor devil.

He'd been dry for five years.

Soda lemon please.

After dolphins and elephants, cats

are the third most intelligent animals.

My Cher can even

open the cat flap herself.

What can she do?

She can open the cat flap.

If she can't do that,

she's disabled.

The lock!

How does she do it?

With her paw.

What's her name?

Cher.

Cher?

Like the singer?

And has she had surgery

on her face too?

You're such an idiot.

You come here often?

No!

Me neither.

Since I stopped drinking, it's no fun.

What's that then?

This is Gin & Tonic,

Gin & Tonic isn't alcohol.

And why are you already so drunk?

That's a good question.

The two of us

shouldn't be here today.

We really got nothing to celebrate.

But honestly, I understand you.

We need some kind of outlet, right?

Shouldn't I drive you home?

No, no, I'm here by car anyway.

Have you called the attorney?

I have to dance.

I need the key.

To unlock the door.

Your fly is open.

Here you go.

Why?

Why do you have my key?

Because I just opened up for you.

So you were in my house?

Good night.

Dad?

Dad?

Come on my love.

What should I do now?

There you are.

I let her out in the evening.

And she didn't come back.

And now she won't get up.

I'll call you when I know something.

He doesn't answer.

We have no other option anyway.

If she shouldn't suffer for no reason.

OK.

Take your time to say goodbye.

Dad, don't you want to go to bed?

You're a m*rder*r.

It was a dog, Dad.

Will you bring me another beer?

Dad!

He has bruises, nothing broken.

We can handle it.

Thank god!

The main problem is his heart.

As you know.

Has it got worse?

Let's see

if we can change the medication.

The most important thing is exercise,

does he do any?

Yes, a walk with the dog every day.

Right?

He still does that, doesn't he?

Yes.

Very good. Keep it up!

One of you has to sigh something.

Down at reception.

We'll do that.

We have to leave.

Need to be in the barn tomorrow morning.

I thought I'd do some shopping for you.

That's sweet. Thanks.

Could I maybe have a coffee?

OK.

I'm a bit tired.

You didn't tell me

your husband died a few days ago.

Oh, I see.

We were already separated.

I see.

I had to process it first.

I have something else to tell you.

The coroner's office has determined...

that your husband

was hit by a car twice.

Twice?

Acting on that info,

I checked his clothes.

And?

There are traces

of white car paint on the pants.

And do you know the make?

CW.

Alright, you have to check

all CW workshops.

There's an easier way.

I called the two biggest

spare parts warehouses,

and so I found Do Lading.

It's not a real workshop,

he does it on the side.

I really want to lie down a bit now.

Andrea, please talk to me.

You didn't run over your husband

on purpose?

Do you believe that?

No! But I have to ask you this.

Andrea, listen to me.

I'll tell you something

I've never told anyone before.

My mother had cancer five years ago,

and she lost a lot of

weight during chemo.

And I had power food at home,

and I thought maybe it would help her.

She didn't want to take it at first,

but I forced her.

Then, she drank way too little.

But when you take something that

concentrated, you have to drink a lot.

And then she died of kidney failure.

What are you talking about?

Everyone makes a mistake at some point.

Ill forget about the car paint,

and I'll forget about Do Lading.

I've never been there.

Why do you want to do this?

The lake is 4.3 square km in size,

and 190 M deep.

That is the height of the dam.

That's probably why it's so deep,

the water goes to the top of the dam.

And before,

it was just fields and forests.

And now there's a lake, incredible!

But you can make electricity with it.

There are these propellers in the dam,

and the water goes in there,

and then electricity is generated.

And with this electricity

we can recharge the boat.

Cool.

Can you imagine there used to be

no water here at all?

Would you like something?

Manner Wafers?

Thank you!

Before he eats something proper

you start with wafers.

Should I give him a bread roll?

No, now he already has it in his hand.

Philip, can you give it to me again?

I think your Dad wants you

to eat a roll.

First cool down,

because we're so heated now.

You always have to be careful.

And now we have to go

head first into the water.

I think we can do it.

Shall I start?

I think yours was better than mine.

At the beginning, St. Polten was hell.

Old friends are gone.

You only see the boy on weekends.

You fall into a black hole.

And now you're feeling better?

Sure.

How did you manage that?

I'm not someone who gives up so easily.

If I'm honest,

I went to therapy.

Do you think that's weird?

I'm not someone who gives up so easily.

Quite a tough guy.

A real cop.

Hey, don't be so cheeky.

Have you thought

about what you'd prefer?

Forensics or crime scene?

I'm really not sure yet.

What do you find more exciting?

Hello!

You seem to be here a lot.

Today was the last day of school.

Party, Party, Party!

It's already the last day of school?

For me.

Dismissed.

-They fired you?

-Yes.

Why?

I have something very important

to tell you.

What do you want from the old fool?

You're young,

everyone buys you a drink anyway.

Mitzi, leave her alone.

First he wants to dance with me,

then he goes away.

Go back to your seat and shut up.

That'll be the day

when you start telling me what to do!

Who do you think you are?

You old drunk.

Do you think she wants you?

I don't need anyone who wants me.

So why did you buy me drinks

all the time?

Excuse me!

Didn't you want to tell me something?

I have very good news for you.

Did I win something?

The forensics department has determined that

the accident was caused by someone else.

What?

You're not to blame for the accident.

I'm not to blame for my accident?

How come?

I think you already had

too many drinks today.

Did I say something wrong?

You think you can just

sneak away without paying?

It's none of your damned

business when I pay!

The waitress asked if I'm paying,

but I'm definitely not!

Don't worry, I'll pay!

Excuse me.

Now I have to ask something else.

When is the court hearing?

You don't have to go to court.

And if so, then only as a witness.

And when is that?

You'll get a letter.

Because in June I'll be

in Auschwitz for a week.

What?

With the fifth grade.

Krakow and Auschwitz

are an interdisciplinary focus.

You were kicked out of school!

Oh, right.

I'm such an idiot.

Should I drop you somewhere?

If you don't turn around and drive home,

I'll take away your driver's license!

Why?

Because you're driving

under the influence!

Shall we try again?

Just go home.

Can I help you?

You can't even help yourself.

What you are saying

is not true.

It may be that I can't help myself.

But it's certainly not true

that I can't help anyone else.

In the past, students even came to me,

when they had a problem.

And you helped them?

Yes.

How did you do that?

By having a good talk.

But that was a while ago, wasn't it?

In the 1990s.

At some point,

they started doing other homework

in my lesson.

And now they don't even

do homework for other classes,

just play on their cell phones.

0.0.

But why were you driving his car?

Because he'd had a few drinks, right?

Now I'm really confused.

He says he was driving.

I'm sorry.

I can't accept that.

-So, who was driving?

-I was.

Do you realize you make me look

a complete fool?

You don't get it anymore!

Sorry.

Then do something right,

so you don't have to apologize!

Sorry.

Would you please blow in?

With pleasure.

Until I say stop.

More, more, more, more, more...!

Stop!

I want to file a

complaint against myself.

Andrea, you can't have

both been driving.

I am the driver of the car,

which, on the night of May the 24th,

struck my husband Andreas Schopenhauer

and then

I fled the scene of the accident.

Excuse me,

I didn't understand that at all.

Yes.

That's fine.

Don't you want to take your time

until tomorrow?

Talk to an attorney?

No.

sh*t.

We already investigated so much anyway.

At some point,

it has to come to an end.

You have to confiscate my car.

Where do I find this f*cking form?

Look, there.

You need to call the district commander,

to come here and suspend me

and take my badge

and my service weapon.

Now in the middle of the night,

or tomorrow morning?

I'm the accused, you can't

trust me to tell you the right thing.

What should I do now?

What do you do

when you don't know what to do?

I ask the person on duty.

Exactly.

How am I gonna explain this at home?

Can you please tell me?

I've already heard about your Dad.

Can we visit him?

That makes no sense at the moment.

Is it that bad?

It's a shame.

Yes.

What are you going to do

with the house?

Will you sell it?

Why?

My grandson is looking for something

to fix up.

Think of us, OK?

Are you serious?

Don't you have

any other problems?

He will come home.

I would prefer that.

Bye.

I'm fine with everything.

Main thing is that no Turks move in.

-Morning.

-Morning.

May 1?

Yes, please.

For you.

For me?

I don't need it. I prefer tea.

And my Dad prefers filter coffee.

Are you going on vacation?

To St. Polten.

Youre going on vacation to St. Polten?

My Dad is in the hospital.

For God's sake,

what's wrong with him?

He fell down the stairs.

sh*t.

Do you know

when a bus leaves from here?

No.

Where's your car?

Impounded.

Are you afraid in the car with me?

No, no.

A little further over... that's good.

I know St. Polten

like the back of my hand.

I studied theology there.

I still know all the bookstores,

all the record stores...

When was the last time

you were in St. Polten?

It's been a while.

Never by car.

What?

I don't like driving in the city.

Do you still have

your driver's license?

No!

I had to hand it in that night.

I often forget things like that now.

May I drive?

With pleasure.

Without a driver's license,

I can't drive back.

Don't you want my car?

What? Forever?

Yes. I think I'd like to get rid of it.

How much do you want for it?

The coffee machine.

The coffee machine.

That's a really good swap for me.

Don't you want me to drive you back?

No, no, it's such nice weather.

Excuse me.

The registration certificate is wedged

in the mirror of the sun visor.

Thanks.