03x17 - Everybody Needs a Little Love

[bunniefuu]

[theme music playing]

NARRATOR:
Man lives in the sunlit world

of what he believes
to be reality.

But... there is,

unseen by most, an underworld.

A place that is just as real

but not as brightly lit.

A dark side.

It should have been
just another Thursday.

Thirst-day, I call it.

Of course,
as far as I'm concerned,

every day is Thirst-day.

The only thing on my mind
was the sweet music

and some jingling ice cubes.

That's where it all started.

Benny's Lounge.

All I was looking for
was a little quick amnesia.

I mean, you try ten hours a day
selling life insurance.

You got to make them think
about death, not life.

Well, an hour or so in Benny's

always made me forget
about death.

My own death,
and the death of my marriage.

After my divorce,

I got to spending
all my evenings at Benny's.

I'm two up on you already.

[laughs]

No contest.

[bill rustling]

Keep 'em filled
till that's gone.

That's where I met Curtis.

Curtis was a regular--

a regular customer
and a regular guy.

They say misery loves company.

Well, Curtis was great company.

Must be pay day, huh?
Huh.

Yep. Company pays me,
then I pay the ex.

First the IRS,

then the dress.
This is all that's left.

[laughing]

Even the roaches
moved out.

They were starving,
living with me.

[chuckling]

I say,
"Good riddance to 'em."

Roaches?

The dames.

We're better off without them.

Yeah, except that what gets me

is the way everyone treats you
once you're solo.

You ever notice that?

Ah, come on. Don't go
into that again, will you?

Nah, nah. You get the worst
tables in restaurants.

Your married friends
don't call you anymore.

[sighs]

Ah...

Without the other half,
you're strictly half-assed.

I know the routine, Curtis.

See, what you and I need
is-is-is something

between married and single,

something in the middle
of the road.

The middle of the road, huh?

Mm-hmm.

The middle of the road's
where the white line is.

That's the most dangerous
place to drive.

[laughing]: Is that so?

Well, then, let's take a drive.

I know the perfect girl.

Come off it, will you?

I'm not in the mood.
Anyway, I'm broke.

Nah, nah. No hanky-panky.

Trust me.

I just want to have
some fun, that's all.

Come on.

Come on.

I should have listened
to that little voice,

telling me to stay put.

I mean,
Curtis always had funny ideas,

but this one was out of bounds.

[laughing]

Shh, shh, shh.

[laughing]

There's some scotch
in the icebox.

Aren't they gonna miss
that thing down at the store?

Hell, no.

Store's got more of these
than we ever use.

She's just as lonely as we are.

Everybody needs a little love,
right, doll?

Here you go.

[laughing]

Ah, to Estelle.

Estelle.

I should have checked out
right then and there.

Estelle, listen to this.

But it was so crazy,
it was fun.

What happens when you cross
a cantaloupe and a collie?

Huh?
I don't know.

You don't know?

You get a melancholy baby!

[both laughing]

And Curtis could be
a real charmer,

even with a dummy like Estelle.

So, I went along with it,
telling jokes,

reminiscing about the w*r,

all kinds of nonsense.

I got one.
Go ahead.

She just sat there,

quiet and attentive,

not like these mouthy dames
you meet nowadays.

Just about ready
to blast this guy.

He turns around, and
it's one of our own men.

Estelle doesn't want
to hear any w*r stories.

Let's liven this
up a little.

I got another
one for you.

What happens when
you cross an elephant

with peanut butter?

You get peanut butter
that never forgets!

[Curtis laughing]

Yeah, we were drunk,
real drunk.

When Curtis started dancing
with the doll,

I started to feel
like the odd man out.

Like a, like a
jealous school boy.

Crazy, huh?

I mean, after all, it was just
a damn piece of wood, right?

What happened next,

I guess I just wrote off
to all the booze.

But, as I was leaving,

I could swear
the damn thing stared at me.

Just stared at me.

I didn't see Curtis
for a few days after that.

I figured he might be sick.

When I called the store
where he worked,

they said he took a week off.

A week off?

Curtis's idea of a vacation
was an extra hour at Benny's,

and I knew
he hadn't been there.

So, when he called
to invite me to dinner,

I figured, "What the hell?"

I hadn't had a good meal
in months.

Although the idea of Curtis
enjoying domestic chores

was a new one on me.

[knocking at door]

Right on time.
Come on in.

I can't believe
I'm actually going

to eat something
that you cooked.

[laughing]

Hey, there's someone here
who wants to see you.

Ha-ha.

You got to be kidding.

[dishes clattering]

Scotch, right?

Here you go, pal.

How about one
for the lady?

Estelle doesn't
like liquor.

Mmm.
Don't worry, though.

She's no prude.

Never gives me
any grief, either.

Isn't that right, honey?

Huh? You're right.

You hungry?
I'm famished.

Uh, hey, uh, they told me you,
uh, you took a week off

from work, huh?

Yeah, that was
Estelle's idea.

Estelle?

Yeah.

She'd never been
to Atlantic City.

So I took her.

We had a ball.

Yeah, sure.
Uh, how was the water, Estelle?

[chuckling]

Estelle doesn't swim.

Hey.

How about that necklace
I bought her?

Are you serious?

You went to Atlantic City
with that thing?

We got the red carpet.

They really know
how to treat a couple.

A couple of what?

Here's to you, doll.

Uh...

I guess she doesn't
like your cooking, huh?

Eats like a bird.

Fanatic about her figure.

Hey, Curtis.

Don-Don't you think
you're taking this thing

a little too far?

Carrying what
a little too far?

This business
with Estelle.

I mean, uh, people might
think you're off your nut.

Nah.

It's like I always said,

"When you're solo,
you get second-class treatment."

Ever since me and Estelle
have been going out...

Hey, get off it,
will ya, Curtis?

What do you take me for,
an idiot?

This is a dummy--

a lifeless,
soulless piece of wood.

See what you've done?

You've upset her.

What did you want
to go and do that for?

Okay, look.
I-I know I've had a few drinks,

but you don't really expect me
to believe this.

Keep your opinions
to yourself, pal.

Okay. Okay.

Maybe I was wrong, Curtis.

Maybe you're a
real lucky guy.

Luckiest around.

Oh, sure.
Yeah, I can see that.

I mean, she's pretty.

Keeps her mouth shut.

Hey, I bet she's real good
in the sack, huh?

Don't you
talk that way.

Oh, yeah.

She could probably do

a real fancy dance with these
double joints of hers.

Probably keep old Curtis's head
spinning like a roulette wheel.

CURTIS:
Cut it out, Roberts!

Yeah, I bet it wouldn't take
much to stew a tomato like you.

Roberts!

Hey, maybe you'd really

come alive for me, huh, babe?

[groans]

Don't you ever act like that
around Estelle again,

you hear me?

Sure, Curtis.

Who needs a stiff
like her, anyway?

Get out! Get out!!

[whispering]

[whispering continues]

Look, I know I was drunk.

But, I mean,
something was cracked.

I couldn't stop
thinking about it.

Boy, your mind can sure play
some weird tricks on you.

[distant, distorted]:
Why are you looking at us
so strange?

[scoffing laugh]

I think you're doing
a great job.

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[laughing]

MAN:
Roberts. Roberts.

Hey, Roberts.

Come on, Roberts.

Roberts. Roberts!

Roberts.

Hey, Roberts.

[mutters]:
What...?

Come on, pal,
let's rejoin the living.

[quiet groan]

What do you
say, Sergeant?

It's Lieutenant now.

And I say
you seen better days.

You ought to know.

Seen him around lately?

Yeah, uh,

I had dinner with him and...

I mean, uh, just me and him
a couple of weeks ago.

Why? What's up?

Well, the store where he works
is coming up a little short

in Curtis's department.

Eh, they're missing some jewelry
and some women's clothes.

Even one of them
new television things.

Well, I-I haven't
seen him for a while.

Uh... well, we-we
had a fight.

About what?

Oh, just a dame.

Nothing serious.

Uh, but I haven't
seen him since then.

You don't think he's embezzling
from the store, do you?

I don't think
anything... yet.

This argument-- he's been
acting strange lately?

No, I didn't mean
anything like that.

Uh...

hey, he got divorced a little
while ago, the same as me,

and, uh, we used to drown
the sorrows together, you know?

That's all.

Maybe you ought
to talk to his ex.

You know where
we could find her?

No, I never met her.

We never talked much
about the wives.

I don't even know her name.

Estelle.

What?!

Estelle-- that's her name.

Yeah, we'd like
to talk to her, all right.

See, that's another thing--

he was married, like you say,

but there's no record
of any divorce.

Lady's gone now.

Poof, not a trace.

Kind of suspicious,
wouldn't you say?

I stayed at Benny's
a couple more hours,

and the more I sat,
the more I drank.

Something inside me kept saying,
"You gotta help him out.

"He's-he's just a poor slob
going through a bad time.

You know what it's like."

I should've had
another drink instead.

[knocking]

[knocking continues]

My God, man, you're a wreck.

Roberts!

[game show playing
quietly over TV]

Oh, good to see
you, old boy.

Uh... I been
thinking about you.

Um, same here, pal.

We were thinking about having
you over for dinner this week.

Weren't we, babe?

Hello, Estelle.

Uh, how you doing?

See?

No hard feelings.

You want me to turn
that up a little?

It's awfully low.

[volume increases,
audience laughing over TV]

[chuckles]

So, how about
a little libation?

GAME SHOW HOST [over TV]:
Okay, that's one...

All right, good.

Listen, uh, Lieutenant Mann
came to see me at Benny's.

[chuckles softly]

She won't let me
out of her sight.

HOST:
Okay, Susan, four darts left.

I can't eat,
can't sleep.

It's-it's, "Get me this.
I want that."

It's worse than
when I was married.

The only time
I've been out is

to pick up that-that
television set.

Yeah, where'd you get the dough
to buy something like that?

That's-that's my business.

Curtis, listen, you're in
more trouble than you realize.

We gotta get you
pulled together.

I know this
doctor, see?

He can tell
the cops...

You think I'm twisted.

Is that it?

No, you just got to get a
grip on yourself, that's all.

Hey, why don't you
come over to my place?

You can really
relax there.

Hey, what stinks
so bad in here?

What about Estelle?

I'll take
care of her.

We won't have any
problems with her.

By the time you wake up,

she'll be back in the
store selling purses.

No, you can't.

She won't stand for it.

All right.

If it'll make you feel any
better, she's firewood.

No! You don't understand.

You don't understand!
Curtis, Curtis!

Don't be a fool!

No!

He hit you then.

No. That's where
you don't get it.

We were struggling, all right,
but I got hit from behind.

[fading in]:
She won't stand for it.

[speaking low
and indistinct]

ROBERTS:
I didn't want to hit him.

I figured he was panicked,
that's all.

I figured if I could
just get him out of there,

he'd calm down.

No!

LIEUTENANT:
You were unconscious?

ROBERTS:
Yeah, like I was dead.

LIEUTENANT:
You couldn't see
or hear anything?

ROBERTS:
Not till I came to, I told you.

That's when I saw Curtis
sitting across the room.

Curtis.

Curtis.

Then I heard the door.

I thought I was seeing things.

It was like a-a vise
on my head.

And the stench
in that room was so bad.

Well, anyway,
I went over to Curtis and...

Curtis.

You all right, pal?

[screaming]

That's when
I started screaming.

[typewriter clacking]

You're saying a store mannequin
knocked you on the head

and then k*lled Curtis?

Yes! That's it!

That's the only way
it could've happened.

Curtis was in front of me,
I got hit from behind.

Who else
could've done it?

By what? By whom?

Come on.

So he's the one?

Definitely.

I'd recognize him anywhere.

See, he'd always get there
first, and then she'd show up.

Real nervous-like.

I waited on 'em
several times,

and I remember
what they ordered.

Steak for him
and seafood for her.

You knew his wife?

No!

I told you, I never met her.

I knew they were
messin' around.

We figure it
that way, too.

Curtis must have found out
and carved her up.

We found her--
or what was left of her--

under the kitchen sink.

Then Roberts must
have found out,

went berserk and
k*lled Curtis.

Tight as the lock
on Fort Knox.

Except for one thing.

What's that?

ROBERTS:
There's only one thing
that could've happened...

No fingerprints.

The knife had no
prints at all.

ROBERTS: I saw somebody
go out the door...

Roberts probably got the bump
on the head in the struggle,

but no prints.

ROBERTS:
The mannequin did it.

Strange, huh?

ROBERTS:
I saw somebody
go out the door.

It had to be Estelle!

I mean, the mannequin!

The mannequin!

What's all this mannequin
business he keeps blabbin'?

Oh, the store's
missing one, all right.

Probably misplaced in
inventory, they say.

No trace of one
at Curtis's.

It'll turn up in some
warehouse eventually.

Got a light?

I told you,
it was the mannequin!

He called it Estelle,
just like his wife!

It was alive, I'm telling you!

The mannequin
was alive!

NARRATOR:
The dark side is always there.

Waiting for us to enter.

Waiting to enter us.

Until next time, try
to enjoy the daylight.