03x07 - Burne's Blues

[bunniefuu]

lions gate home entertainment

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ heroes in a half shell ♪

♪ turtle power ♪

♪ they're the world's most
fearsome fighting team ♪

We're really hip.

♪ They're heroes
in the half shell ♪

♪ and they're green ♪

Hey, get a grip.

♪ When the evil shredder
attacks ♪

♪ these turtle boys
don't cut him no slack ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ splinter taught them
to be ninja teens ♪

He's a radical rat.

♪ Leonardo leads,
Donatello does machines ♪

That's a fact, Jack.

♪ Raphael is cool
but rude ♪

Give me a break.

♪ Michelangelo
is a party dude ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ heroes in a half shell ♪

♪ turtle power ♪♪

DJ ON RADIO: Hey, all you
ill-guided juveniles!

You're listening to
the hottest sounds around,

and I do mean hot.

It's 112 degrees.
Count 'em. Ha ha!

So here's a cool
little number--

the eskimos with
pass the blubber to me, bubba!

MICHELANGELO:
Whoa, dudes.

There's nothing better
to beat the heat

than a steaming pizza!

Ohh, Michelangelo,
how can you eat hot pizza

on a day like this?

Come on, April,

hot pizza
is always cool.

Yeah, especially if it's cooked
by Wolfgang plink.

The man's a genius.

The Picasso of pizza.

That's why plink's
is the hot place.

Oh, you can say
that again.

The air conditioning
must be on the blink.

MICHELANGELO: Hey,
here comes the dude himself.

You fortunate people
have the privilege

OF SAMPLING MY LATEST
WOLFGANG PLINK CREATION:

Tofu and
the fresh shrimp.

MICHELANGELO: Get serious.

Ooh, smells more
like old socks.

[SNIFF SNIFF]

It has spoiled!

How could
such a thing happen?

Good heavens!

It is completely
gewerkenstinken!

How can this be?

My refrigerator
was just repaired today.

Whew! It's times
like these

that I appreciate
living in a sewer.

All right, here!

Nobody's going nowheres

till we get your money
and jewelry, that is.

ALL: Money and jewelry?

Well, that lets
us out.

This is no joke.
It's a holdup!

Hey, what are you guys
dressed up for,

a trip back to Casablanca?

You like these outfits
any better?

Haee-yah!

Whoa!

Now chill out, dude.

Whoa-aah!

Get those lizards!

Lizards?

All right, turtles.

Time to work off
some of those calories.

Wa-hee!
Wa-hee!

Yah!
Yah!

Whoa!

Awesome arsenal!

Dinner is served!

Ooh! Unh!
Aah!

Mmm, a new Wolfgang plink
taste sensation--

anchovy pizza topped
with a chocolate fudge.

Could I order
one to go?

And so once again,

the mysterious ninja turtles

have protected
the lives and property

of the citizens
of our city.

This is April O'Neill,
channel 6 news,

reporting from
what used to be plink's.

Well, burne,
what did you think?

I thought it lacked
some basic ingredients.

Are you talking about
the story or the pizza?

I'm sorry, April.

You just didn't
dig deep enough.

What's the matter,
April,

afraid you'd ruin
your manicure?

You are wrong,
Mr. Thompson!

That story
had everything--

pathos, passion...

Uh...Pepperoni.

But it didn't
have turtles.

If you had gotten
some film

on these
so-called heroes,

that would be
a story.

Well, you see,
they asked me not to--

in my day, we didn't
make excuses.

We made news.

Reporters were
tough back then.

We'd do anything
to get our story.

Right. And if he weren't
so old and out of shape,

he'd find out who
those turtles are in no time.

Old and out
of shape, am I?

Uh...

What I meant was--

I'll show all of you

that I can get the poop

on those
trouble-making turtles.

I don't care what slime
I have to crawl through,

what maniacs
I'll have to face,

or what death-defying risks
I'll have to take.

Boss, you're
my kind of newsman.

And you're coming
with me.

Me? Ohh!

No, but I--I...

Wait! What story
am I assigned to?

Who cares?

Do a story on why everyone's
air conditioning is broken.

Air conditioning? Ha!

Well, why not?

It ought to be
a hot story.

Hmm. You know, Irma,

you might be
on to something.

There.
The finishing touch.

Now that's what a real
news hound looks like.

Are you sure you're
still up to this, boss?

Of course I am.

A good reporter
remembers everything.

Uh, everything?

Well, almost everything.

Brr! It's chilly
for this time of year,

wouldn't you say?

It's colder
than a turtle's tail fin.

Well, I think
it's totally cool.

Whoa! Unh!

And also
totally painful.

It makes no sense.

Why is it so c-cold
down here

and so hot up there?

Most unusual.

I fear something
is afoot.

Hey, fellas,
it's April.

Well,
it's about time.

I've had it
with January.

April--
on the turtlecom.

Turtles, come in,
please.

What's up, April?

Can you meet me back
at plink's pizza

in 10 minutes?

Sure thing.

All right!

When in doubt,
pig out!

And I found out that
channel 6's air conditioning

was repaired by the same outfit
that fixed plink's--

s & k refrigeration.

They don't do
very good work.

Hunh,
that's for sure.

Every unit
in a 10-block radius is out,

and they've all been
serviced by s & k.

Somebody should
file a complaint.

I tried, but they're not
listed in the phone book.

Hey, I saw their truck
parked here earlier.

They might still be
in the area.

You fellas check out
the east side of town.

I'll take the west.

You got it.

Turtles, let's get
our shells in gear!

[SIREN]

Uh, boss,
do you really think

we should be in this
neighborhood at night?

Of course.

That's how I'll get
the inside dope

on those turtles.

This place is crawling
with informers.

[SQUEAKING]

Ohh!

It's crawling
with lots of things.

Will you pull
yourself together?

There. I told you.

Now to make contact
with him.

I'm looking
for the giant turtles.

Is the tablecloth red?

It must be some
new underworld slang.

The turtles are green.

That is not the password.

Who are you?
How much do you know?

Actually,
I don't know anything.

He's my boss.

I know even less
than he does.

We shall see.

We have ways
of making you talk.

Bingo, fellas!

I found
the repair truck.

Corner of 4th street
and main.

I'm gonna
check it out.

LEONARDO: April,
don't! Wait!

Ok. I won't wait.

Excuse me.

I'd like to ask you
a few questions.

Bebop!

Don't worry, krang.

The girl can do us
no further harm.

She's unable
to warn the turtles.

[MUFFLED]
What are you doing?

And what of operation
ice station?

Never fear.

We have more freon

stolen from the city's
air conditioning units

ready for transfer
to the technodrome.

Freon? Get real!

That primitive fluorocarbon
is too unstable.

We must
implement plan b.

Plan b?

Plan b is to obtain
a supply of nutrifreeze,

an experimental gas


than freon.

I want you to break
into the nutrifreeze plant

and steal it.

You heard him.

To the nutrifreeze
plant.

Uh, right, boss.

[TIRES SCREECHING]

We're too late.

April's gone.

Wow, it looks
like some dude

really peeled rubber.

I smell freon.

It must have come from
the refrigeration truck.

Hey, check it out--
a trail of gas.

It must be April.

I bet she was captured

and she leaving us
a trail.

Captured?
By whom?

By those s & k creeps,
who else?

I wonder what s & k
stands for?

I'm willing to bet

it's not
sensitive and kindly.

Ha ha ha ha ha!

No!

I can't stand it.

Please, no!

I tell you, we don't
know anything. Please.

Ha ha ha ha!

h* h*,
ha ha ha ha!

No!

Oh, I can't
stand it.

Enough. If they
knew anything,

they'd have talked
by now.

No one can withstand


of intense tickling.

See? I told you
we didn't know anything.

Unfortunately,
now you do.

It will be necessary
to liquidate you.

Ohh!

[TIRES SCREECHING]

We've been discovered.

Quickly.
We must escape.

We're saved?

I can't believe it.

I told you, Vernon.

We old pros
are survivors.

The word is out
on the street

that you're
looking for me.

Why, no.

I'm looking for
those darned turtles.

That's me.

I'm don turtelli.

So who sent you?

No one sent us.
Honest.

No? I got ways
to make you talk.

Ohh!

Oh, no. Not again.

BEBOP: Ow.

SHREDDER: Careful
with that, you numskull.

Ah, gee, I was just doing
what you told me.

He never told you
to brain me.

That's enough!

You must handle this
nutrifreeze carefully.

It's extremely volatile.

Oh, uh,
what's that mean?

DONATELLO: It means
prone to explode...

Just like us.

The turtles!
Foot soldiers, attack!

Come on, bebop.

Let's soften
them up first.

Hyah!
Hyah!

Unh! Ooh!

Hey, dudes!

If at first you
don't succeed, um...

Oh, oh, um...

Try again,
you imbeciles!

Oh, yeah.
That's it.

Time to boogie, dudes.

Uh-oh, I hear the patter
of little foot soldiers.

I have an idea.
Hyah!

MICHELANGELO: Whoa,
I can dig it.

It's like
roundup time.

All right!

The foot soldiers
are ready for shipping

just in time
for the holidays.

Stop them!

Operation ice station
must not fail!

You heard the boss.

Let's make turtle mush.

No, you nitwits.

Not with
the nutrifreeze.

Time to get crunched,
shellheads.

Wrong, mutant-breath.

Whoa.

Nuclear nose job.

What's happening?

I feel like frosty
the snowturtle.

It's that nutrifreeze.

It froze
Michelangelo solid.

What are we gonna do?

We can't leave him
like this.

Aah! Turtles!

It's April!
Let's go.

It's a trap.

Quick. Run for it.

Welcome, turtles.

Too late, you
meddling reptiles.

As Michelangelo
would say,

chill out, dudes.

I--I can't move.

It will be a cold day

when you can get
the better of me.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Unh!

You'll never get away
with this, shredder.

Oh, tsk tsk.

Such atrocious dialogue

from such a pretty face.

Hurry. We must get
the nutrifreeze

to the modules.

Ooh, let me blast
those turtles, boss.

I love it when they
can't fight back.

Do as I say.

Time is of the essence.

Au revoir, turtles,
till we meet again.

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Ooh!
Unh!

I still
don't understand

why did those
mobsters let us go?

Well,
a good newsman knows

when to hold
and when to fold.

And when to blubber
like a baby?

Well, it worked,
didn't it?

Look. It's
the turtles!

Vernon, this is it.

The story
I've searched for.

Now's my chance

to expose those
slimy, green lawbreakers

for what they are.

What--what's going on?

Stop! Put us down!

We're TV people.

The ice--it's
starting to melt.

Oh, what happened,
dudes?

I must've zoned out.

The last thing
I remember,

shredder was headed
for the sewers.

And he had April
with him.

We've got
to stop shredder

before he
puts nutrifreeze

to some
horrible use.

Oh, like what?

Well, it isn't to open

a chain of
frozen yogurt stands.

Rock steady,
where did you park

those transport modules?

Hmm. Let me see.

Pawn ticket
for one stun laser.

That ain't it.

I lost the ticket, boss.

Why must I be cursed

with a couple of
dipsticks like you?

Hey, boss, look.

The modules.

Rock steady, bebop,
bring miss O'Neill

and come with me.

Foot soldiers,
operate module two.

You might as well
give up, shredder.

You're through.

Really. Name one person
who can stop me.

I'll name four--

cowabunga!

Wow, talk about
fighting dirty.

Module two,
fire proton rocket.

A rocket!

It's every turtle
for himself!

Where are we?

I think
I'd rather not know.

[SPEAKING ALIEN LANGUAGE]

Who are you, people?

What do you want?

Oh, no.
It can't be.

Zorkon gleek norkit,
hound dog.

What are you planning
to do to us?

Kitchy kitchy koo.

Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!

Well, miss O'Neill,

I hope you're not
counting on the turtles

saving you this time.

Ha ha! By now,
they're nothing more

than chunks
of turtle meat

splattered
on the sewer walls.

Yeah.
Pretty gross, huh?

Shredder, you're
fiendishly inhuman.

Thank you.

DONATELLO:
Please take your seats.

We will be experiencing
some turbulence.

What?

Thank you for flying
superside airline.

Cowabunga,
companeros!

It's those
blasted turtles!

Look at us,
fellas!

Bet you can't hit us.

Watch out, turtles!

Way to go!
Direct hit!

Ooh, we're
slowing down, boss.

What do we do now?

Prepare to eject.

A word of advice--

when this module
crashes,

try not to go
all to pieces.

Aah!

Those creeps.
They've left April.

Uh, isn't that
what we wanted?

Not if she's inside

when the nutrifreeze
goes boom.

Not to worry.

It would take
a tremendous impact

to cause that.

Will that do?

Thanks, guys.

Hang on, April.

We're going to make
turtle tracks.

[expl*si*n]

Whoa.

That nutty nutrifreeze.

Unh!
Ohh!

How unbelievable.

I could've sworn

we were beamed aboard
that spaceship

only an hour ago.

But it was summertime.

We must've been
gone for months.

Vernon, I'm about to file
the story of the century.

Well, shredder,

thanks to your
incompetence,

operation ice station
is a failure.

Failure?

We've cooled the place
off, haven't we?

[SNORT]

Can we take
a break now, boss?

Oh, shut up and keep running.

But, Mr. Thompson,

are you sure you want
to reveal this story?

Do I?

Just stand aside
and watch

how a real reporter
digs up the facts.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

This is burne Thompson
with the news.

In the tradition
of responsible reporting

that is the hallmark
of channel 6 news,

here is tonight's
top story.

Elvis clones from Mars
invade earth!

Ha ha ha ha!

Really,
Mr. Thompson,

you must get a grip
on yourself.

Yeah. Get real.

Ha ha!
But's it's true,

every word of it.

Keep watching the skies,

and don't trust
anyone with sideburns!

Ha ha! h* h*,
ha ha ha ha!

Heh heh! Who says

there's nothing
funny on television?