04x07 - Bebop and Rocksteady Conquer the Universe

[bunniefuu]

♪♪ [THEME SONG]

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in a half shell ♪

♪ Turtle power ♪

♪ They're the world's ♪

♪ Most fearsome fighting team ♪

We're really hip.

♪ They're heroes
in the half shell ♪

♪ And they're green ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ When the evil Shredder
attacks ♪

♪ These turtle boys
don't cut him no slack ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Splinter taught them
to be ninja teens ♪

He's a radical rat.

♪ Leonardo leads ♪

♪ Donatello does machines ♪

And that's a fact, Jack.

♪ Raphael is cool,
but rude ♪
Gimme a break.

♪ Michelangelo
is a party dude ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in a half shell ♪

♪ Turtle power ♪

[SNORING]

Boy, Michelangelo's
snoring is loud.

And his stomach noises
are really loud.

I like to think of it as music.

Michelangelo's duet for stomach
and sinuses in D flat.

[LEONARDO]
Quiet, you guys.

April's on-the-spot news
report is beginning.

I'm here at the 17th Street
police station, where a bizarre
burglary has taken place.

With me is Lieutenant Montoya.
Tell our audience what happened,
Lieutenant.

[Lt. Montoya]
Last night, thieves broke
into our crime lab exhibit.

They stole only items
connected with the Teenage
Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Do you have any theories
about this unusual theft?

[SIGHS]
We haven't got a clue,
Miss O'Neil.

[APRIL]
Mysterious thieves with
Ninja Turtle memorabilia.

April O'Neil,
with Channel Six News.

Why would anyone want
stuff connected to us?

[BEEP]

Hi, guys.

[LEONARDO]
Hi, April.
What's up?

I'm through with work and felt
like having a Vinnie's pizza.

Wanna join me? My treat.

[SNORING STOPS]

Mmm, oh! Did someone
mention pizza? At Vinnie's?

Whoa, let's make
turtle tracks, dudes.

Promise him a pizza
and he'll follow
you anywhere.

[RAPHAEL]
Whoa, man.

I think that last piece finally
got my scarf alarm turned off.

But maybe I'll just
get one to go.

Hey, Vinnie. Could
I get a jumbo with
everything, to go?

To go? Sure.

Hey, dude. What happened
to that pizza box we
autographed?

It used to be right there.

Hey, how about that?

Somebody must have
swiped it.

Yeah, but why would anyone
want to steal a pizza box
with our signatures on it?

Mondo bizarro, dude.

First they cop the stuff from
the cop shop and now this.

Walk me home, guys?
This is not a safe
neighborhood.

We would be most
happy to escort you,
young lady.

[CAR HORN HONKS]

[APRIL]
Thanks, guys.

I'll see you later.

[CRASH]
There's someone
in your apartment.

[LEONARDO]
Hey, what are you
doing here?

[DONATELLO]
He's getting away.

I'll get
the license number.

3-A-N-4-6-2

[ENGINE STARTS]
[TIRES SCREECH]

Come on, Turtles.
We'll follow them
on the rooftops.

You dudes take the high road.
I'll take the sewer road.

April, keep an eye on my pizza!

Keep an eye on my pizza?

Hmm, I've got better
things to do.

Lt. Montoya, I've got
a license plate number I'd
like you to trace for me.

♪♪ [THEME SONG]

[DONATELLO]
He's going too fast.
We can't keep up.

I'll give him
some laundry to do.

Those jockey shorts'll
cramp his style.

What is this,
an underwear storm?

Surfing the sewer circuit
is truly rad.

Surf's up!

Kowabunga, dude!

[COUGHS]

[TIRES SCREECH]

Stuck in traffic?
Next time, try the train.

Boss, I'm in trouble.

The Turtles got me trapped.

Calm down, Clyde.
I anticipated
your stupidity.

Just push the red button
on the dashboard.

Red button, right.
Uh, gotcha.

Look out! Gas!

[TURTLES COUGH]

[TURTLES LAUGH]

Look...he's--he's
getting away.

[TIRES SCREECH]

Did you guys hear
the one about...

This is--this is no
time for--for gags,
Michelangelo.

Well, when else can I...

get you dudes...

to laugh at my jokes?

Wow, who's your
decorator?

A burglar. And he stole
all my Turtle souvenirs.

But what really makes me mad
is he took my Turtlecom.

[PHONE RINGS]

Hello?

Oh, hello, Lt. Montoya.

You have the address
of the person who owns
the pickup truck?

Great. 7-7-7 77th Street.
Thanks so much, Lieutenant. Bye.

Come on, Irma. We're
gonna catch a thief.

And then the pickup truck
drove off, Master Splinter.

I do not like the sound
of this, my students.

I just remembered.
April saw the license
number of that pickup.

We can trace
the owner that way.

Turtles calling April.
Come in, April.

Calling April.

Strange, she's not answering.

Whoa, maybe that burglar
dude came back for seconds.

Let's go, Turtles.

[RAPHAEL]
Uh, fellas, why couldn't
we just use the elevator

to get to April's apartment?

[LEONARDO]
This is more visual.

April's gone.

Uh-oh. I've got
a bad feeling about
this, compadres.

I bet she found the address
of that truck's owner and
went off to investigate.

They can always read addresses
like this in the movies.



April could be in trouble.

Let's go.

Could we use the elevator
if nobody watches?

[TIRES SCREECH]

[APRIL]
This is the address.

This guy gives bad
taste a bad name.

[APRIL]
Wait a minute,
I know this house.

I did a news story here. It
belongs to Monroe Q. Flem,
the billionaire collector.

The billionaire
collector?

How greedy.
I only want one billionaire.

No, he's a billionaire.
He collects things.

I'll bet that's why
he stole my stuff.

He's collecting
Turtle memorabilia.

Wait here for me.
If I'm not back
in ten minutes--

Can I have
your blue sweater?

call the Turtles.

There's that truck.

Billionaire collector or not,
he can't have my Turtlecom.

[DOGS BARKING]

That sounds like
Michelangelo's stomach.

Oh, no! Guard dogs!

[DOGS BARKING]

Stay back, nice doggies.

I won't hurt you.

[APRIL]
Ahh!

Well, well, a visitor.

[APRIL]
Help!

Are you the person I called
to exercise my doggies?

No! Call them off!

Don't be afraid,
my dear.

My gas will stop them.

Yuck! What did
you do to them?

That's my pacifying gas.

It turns any beast
into a cuddly pet.

Of course, you're
Monroe Q. Flem.

You manufacture
exotic gasses.

So, you've heard of me.

Of course, my many collections
are world famous.

My stamp collection, my coin
collection, my paintings
of Elvis on velvet.

I'm more interested in
something one of your g*ons
collected from my apartment.

Why, you're
April O'Neil.

I apologize. My boys do
tend to get carried away.

But perhaps you'd like
to see my collection
of Turtle memorabilia.

I've always been
fascinated with turtles.

When I was a child,
my mother gave away
my pet turtle, Rosebud.

And now I'm getting even
with Mommie dearest

by owning the world's
largest collection of
Ninja Turtle artifacts.

It's so fortunate that
you've come, my dear.

You can help me
complete my collection.

Get real, Flem.

The only thing I'm going
to help you with is turning
yourself in to the police.

Oh, dear.
Edgar, Miss O'Neil is
being uncooperative.

Lock her up until
she changes her mind,
would you please?

[GRUNTS]
Right, Mr. Flem.

Hey, let go! Get
your hands off me!

Help!

Yes, scream all
you want, Miss O'Neil.

No one can hear you.

[APRIL]
Help! Help!

[SNORING]

Here's your guest
cell, sweetie.

Don't call me sweetie,
smog breath!

Oh, you're a feisty one.

Well, you won't be
so uppity when you see

what Mr. Flem's
got planned for you
and your Turtle friends.

Well, here's
a change of plans.

Uhh!

Ow!

Which way's the exit?

[EDGAR]
Hey, come back here.

Shredder! Aah!

You got caught
by a dummy.

You or this?

Very funny.

The boss had wax figures
made of everybody the
Turtles was involved with.

He looks so real.

Not as real as some
are going to look.

What do you mean?

You'll find out.

Uhh!

Now, behave
yourself.

I hope Irma got ahold
of the Turtles.

Put that in the
diorama of the
Turtles' lair, Clyde.

I'll examine it later.

Right, boss.

Doh!

Be careful, mush brain!

Sorry, boss.

It can't be.

It is!

A Turtlecom.

After all these years,
after my unending search,

I am about to reach my moment of
total and complete fulfillment!

Shut up, you dolt!

[DONATELLO]
Turtles calling April.
Come in, April.

No luck, huh?

No. And I don't
like it.

Calling April.

This frequency tracking
device will lead me
to the Turtles' lair.

As soon as I lock
onto their base station.

Ah-ha!

I've done it! I've found
the Turtles' lair.

[TIRES SCREECH]

This is the place.

[IRMA SNORES]

What's that noise?

[RAPHAEL]
Sounds like Michelangelo's
stomach.

It's Irma.

Awesome noise.
Maybe they're using her
to scare away intruders.

I'll bet that April's
already inside.

Whoa, totally
tasteless decor, dudes.

They ought to put up a higher
wall around this pad.

To keep people out?

No, to keep people
from seeing in.

Come on, Turtles.

Uh-oh, here come a couple
of man's best friends.

Man's best friends?
Mondo bummer.
We're turtles.

[SNARLING]

♪♪ [THEME SONG]

Hi-ya!

Okay, guys. It's
time for our flying
Ninja Turtle act.

Now, to figure out
how to get in here.

That's called
the scientific method.

Ha ha ha! Now my priceless
Turtles are here.

Soon my collection
will be complete.

Do you guys have the feeling
somebody's gonna pop out and say

"Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,
this is your life?"

Hey, remember this?

The case of the
two-headed biker.

Yeah, and this was the
shovel we used to battle
the giant Sumerian slug.

Yeah, he was a regular pest.

This is amazing.

Really, I'm even
impressed by us.

[FLEM]
I'm flattered by your
assessment of my work.

I know you. You're the
extravagantly flamboyant
collector Monroe Q. Flem.

I am indeed.

And you are the famous
Ninja Turtles.

Haa, I've waited
for this moment.

We know you've got April O'Neil.

Hand her over!

[LAUGHS]
She's fine, fine.

In fact, she'll be
happy to see you.

I'll take you to her.

[DONATELLO]
Wow, that looks like the lair.

Yes, I created it
from my imagination.

I'm so pleased
it's accurate.

I don't yet have
the perfect images of you
turtles for this tableau.

But I will solve
that problem shortly.

[LAUGHS]

This Flem dude
sure laughs a lot.

Villains on this
show always do.

Turtles, help!

Let her go, you fiend!

Another classic line,
Leonardo.

Hey!

[COUGHING]

Look out!

Tie them up.

What did you do to them?

I just gave them
a dose of my special
Turtle knock-out gas.

You've got gas for
everything, haven't you?

Wait until you see what's
going to happen to you and
your precious Turtles.

That's really a gas.

[LAUGHS]

Getting gassed means never
having to listen to bad jokes.

[APRIL]
I was just kidding
about the bad jokes.

Flem, what are you doing?

I have discovered a new
method to create the most
lifelike wax figures.

Miss O'Neil is going to be
my first test subject.

No! I just had my legs waxed!

If my method works on her,
you four will be next in line.

And then I will put you
in my diorama of the lair,

permanently coated with wax.

Total bummer. We're all
gonna be turtle waxed.

[FLEM]
Soon your beauty
will be preserved....forever!

[LAUGHS]

I'd rather grow old gracefully.

Flem, let her go.
I'll be your
test subject.

Oh, how very gallant
of you.

But I cannot risk failure.

Ninja Turtles are rare
and priceless.

News anchors, on the other
hand, are a dime a dozen.

That tears it.

You scuzzy weasel!

Wait'll I get my hands on you!

We gotta do something.

We can still move.

Let's get over there
and try to delay Flem.

We're tied up hand
and foot, Leonardo.

No problemo. We
could take this dude
with our hands tied.

[ALL]
Uhh! Uhh! Uhh!

Oh, look, how quaint.
The turtle hop.

Look out! Gas!

Three times
in one show.

[TEETH CHATTER]

I call this my freeze gas.

One blast will temporarily
turn a living subject
into a statue.

Clyde! Edgar!

Yes, boss?

Now, be good henchmen and
put them in the lair diorama
in the museum, won't you?

I want to see how
they'll look as part
of the permanent display.

[IRMA SNORES]

Oh, where am I?

Oh, no!

Oh, I was supposed
to call the Turtles
half an hour ago.

I'd better go see
if April's alright.

I am such an artiste.

When the Turtles are permanently
coated with wax, they will look
simply marvelous.

We've got to get out of here.

My nose itches.

I've got the major
munchies.

The Turtles.

We better dip these
Turtles before that
gas wears off, boss.

We have at least
a half an hour
at this temperature.

I want to finish
O'Neil first.

I've gotta revive
the Turtles. But how?

He's freezing cold.

Donatello, snap out of it!

S-s-stop shaking me!

That doesn't work.

Now what?

Raise the temperature control.

Of course,
they're frozen.

I'll raise the
temperature control.

Boy, this mental telepathy
stuff really works.

Computerized climate control.

This must be it.

Good thing I took that class
in how to use computers.

What's happening?

The temperature is rising.

My wax figures!

Oh, my precious family of wax!

They are being destroyed!

Whoever is responsible
for this will pay!

[BANG]

It's amazing what a little
technical skill can do.

Come on, guys.
Snap out of it.

[TURTLES]
Oh!

I must have
something in here for
an emergency like this.

Ah-ha!
Eau de nightingale.

My favorite perfume.

That'll bring 'em
back to life.

[VIOLENT COUGHING]

Who's wearing
that cheap perfume?

Cheap? I'll have you know
that costs $15 a quart.

Hurry, guys.
April's in danger!

Turtles! Perfect
timing as usual.

I'll shut off
the controls.

You Turtles have
ruined everything.

But I will have
my revenge.

Prepare to meet your doom

at the metal hands
of my waxmation warriors!

[LAUGHS]

[BEEPS]

Wow, under those wax figures,
Flem had a robot army.

Well, let's see what's
under those robots.

Ha! Just as I thought.

Nothing.

Hey! Gimme back my size!

Now, there's a guy
with a sparkling
personality.

Thanks, Michelangelo.

No problemo, dude.

Hey! Put me down!

Well, at least you made
a good impression.

No, get away!

You'll ruin everything!

That's my plan, Flem.

Get him!

Ha ha, I can't move.

Let's hop outta here.

Give that back!

[DONATELLO]
Now we'll see how
these things work.

Oh, thanks, Leonardo.

It's all part
of the service.

Rescues 'R Us.

[FLEM]
No! No!

No! No! No!

[LEONARDO]
Looks like our biggest fan
is not too happy with us.

Well, you know, that's
the way it is. One minute,
they love you, the next,

your autographed photo
is lining their birdcage.

The extravagantly flamboyant
billionaire, Monroe Q. Flem,

was taken to the city sanitarium
for observation.

The stolen Ninja Turtle
memorabilia were returned
to their rightful owners.

Look, dudes. We even got
Vinnie's pizza box back.

Maybe he'll give us
a free refill.

This is April O'Neil for Channel
Six News, saying good night.

You know, if Flem
ever remembers
where the lair is,

we might be in trouble
again, guys.

Hey, that's not a problem. I
installed the Turtlecom base
station a mile away from here.

Just in case.

Well, what do you think
made Phlegm get so weird
like that, Sensei?

Dudes, Sensei's
really zoned way out.

Exactly what does
this "zoned way out"
mean, my student?

Whoa! I'm seeing double.

Ha ha ha. It's wax.

We brought it over
from Flem's museum.

Very funny, dudes.

Gotcha.

[LAUGHING]

Good one, Leonardo.