05x05 - Michaelangelo Meets Bugman Again

[bunniefuu]

♪♪ [theme song]

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

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Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in a half shell ♪

♪ Turtle power ♪

♪ They're the world's ♪

♪ Most fearsome
fighting team ♪

We're really hip.

♪ They're heroes
in the half shell ♪

♪ And they're green ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪
Hey, get a grip.

♪ When the evil Shredder
attacks ♪

♪ These Turtle boys
don't cut him no slack ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Splinter taught them
to be ninja teens ♪

He's a radical rat.

♪ Leonardo leads ♪

♪ Donatello does machines ♪

That's a fact, Jack.

♪ Raphael is cool,
but rude ♪
Gimme a break.

♪ Michelangelo
is a party dude ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

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Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
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♪ Heroes in a half shell ♪

♪ Turtle power ♪

[Man on speaker]
T-minus four,

and clear to lift...

[continues indistinct]

This is not my idea
of a smart thing
to do, Donatello.

But I've just gotta get
a closer look at that rocket.

Imagine...

It's going on
a four-year mission

to explore the surface
of the planet Venus.

Well, I'd rather be
exploring the surface
of a pizza, dude.

Besides, this base
is restricted.

We shouldn't even be here.

Relax, Leonardo.

We're not hurting anything.

Besides, I can learn
a lot from this place.

"Central-Matic
Waste Disposal System."

Wow.

See? You just attach
this hose to that nozzle,

and it sucks up dirt
into a central incinerator.

Terrific.
State-of-the-art
dirt disposal.

Hey, you!
What are you doing
in there?

Uh, we were
just leaving.

[stammering]
Wait! Hold it!

On second thought,

what would the brass think

if I told them
I was chasing
little green men?

[Krang]
What's keeping
those two punks?

We must have
the mutagen ready

before that rocket
takes off this afternoon.

I know. I know.

You don't have to tell me.

I'm not.

I'm telling the audience.

We must load the mutagen

in the rocket's
fuel tanks,

so it will be blasted
all over the city

by he vapor trail
during take-off,

turning every human being

into a horrible mutant.

Don't worry.

Bebop and Rocksteady
will be back soon.

They'd better!

We must have
that Byndex 3

in order to stabilize
the mutagen,

or else it can't cause
any permanent mutations.

Hi, Boss.
We're back.

See? I told you
they'd be here.

But where is
the Byndex 3?

[stammering]

Well... Um--

Don't tell me
you didn't get it.

But Boss, the place
was crawling with guards.

They had the whole building
surrounded.

What? Why would
a small-time company

like Ace Scientific

be surrounded
by guards?

Well, it wasn't at first.

Yeah, yeah.
We snuck in,

and we grabbed
the container
of Byndex 3

like you told us.

But as we were leaving,

we spotted
this candy machine.

But it ate my quarter
and wouldn't spit out
a candy bar.

So we blasted it.

And that's when they
called the guards?

Whoa, gee, Boss.
How'd you guess?

I don't believe this.

You morons!

Now we'll never get
the Byndex 3

before that rocket
launches.

[metal clangs]
[Man clears throat]
Excuse me!

Hello, I'm Seymour Guts
from Fly By Night Messengers.

Is this the Touch of Romance
flower shop?

Does this look
like a flower shop?

Well, not as such.

But I have this urgent
overnight letter to deliver
to them, you see.

How the devil
did you wind up
all the way up there?

Well, I don't have
a very good sense
of direction.

Well, direct yourself
out of here!

Yes, but I absolutely,
positively must get

this letter delivered.

How about if we
deliver you?

Air mail!

[yelps]

Ow! Hey! Uh!

What is this?

[groaning]

It's a catastrophe!

[Rocksteady]
Yeah, the poor guy's
going all to pieces.

Who cares about that?

The klutz
has contaminated
my mutagen.

Well, we'd better
get him out of there.

[Raphael]
Nice going, Donatello.

We nearly get thrown
in jail,

because you wanna look
at some oversized
Fourth of July rocket.

Okay, okay.
I'm sorry.

Let's see
what's happening
on the news.

This is April O'Neil

live at the
Ace Scientific Company.

The building
is heavily guarded,
because earlier today

two men broke in
and attempted to steal

a rare compound
called Byndex 3.

Adding to this mystery,
eyewitnesses claim

that the burglars
were wearing animal masks

and trying to steal candy
from a machine.

Whoa, crooks with
a sense of humor
and a sweet tooth,

I like it.
Give me a break.

What kind of flakes
would wear animal masks?

Perhaps they were
not masks at all.

But that doesn't make sense,
unless they were...

[All]
Bebop and Rocksteady!

Turtles, we better check out
that scientific company.

[All]
Go Green Machine!

[Shredder]
Well, at least
he'll hold together,

even if he won't win
any beauty contests.

Why not?

What's the matter
with me?

[screaming]

What did that stuff
do to me?

It's a powerful
mutation-causing agent.

And you'll need
a steady supply of it

from that tank
on your back

in order to hold
yourself together.

Boy, he's a regular
mutagen man!

Oh, I'm so ugly.

Why, I'd be better off
if I looked like--

like-- like you,
you freak.

Well, this
is incredible.

[groaning]

Do that again.

Make yourself look
like him.

How much longer
are we gonna do this?

I still have this letter
to deliver

to the Touch of Romance
flower shop.

Astounding!
He even sounds like me.

But without the Byndex 3
to stabilize the mutagen,

he won't be able
to look like anybody

for more than
a few minutes.

I just wanna look like
my old self again.

[groaning]

[crying]
I can't do it!

That's it!

Seymour,
we could turn you back

into your old self
permanently.

But you have to do us
a little favor.

Well, what favor?

I want you to go
to the Ace Scientific Company,

find a canister
marked "Byndex 3",

and bring it back here.

Oh, but--
but that's stealing.

Byndex 3 is
the only thing

that can keep you
from constantly mutating.

You can't permanently change

back to your old self
without it.

We're never gonna make it
past all those guard dudes.

We'll have to come up
through the basement.

Well, that was easy.

Yeah? Not from
where I'm standing.

[chuckles]

All right,
you green weirdos.

Come out nice
and slow.

Oh, I just knew
we should have taken
the elevator.

Boy, I never thought
I'd find this place.

Now, how am I going
to get inside?

Excuse me.
Coming through here.
Coming through.

Is that the Byndex 3?
Sure is.

They, uh, told me
to put it in the vault.

Hey, good thinking.

Does this place
have a vault?

Now I have it.

I'd better get
this Byndex 3

back to that
Shredder fellow

before I start
changing again.

Oh, no!

Too late!

The mutation's wearing off.

[groaning]

Uh-oh.

Erma, see if you can
find me some tape

for this loose cord.
Oh, sure thing, April.

Maybe there's
some tape in here.

Hey!

Let me out of here!

[groaning]

Did you find
some tape?

Tape? What tape?

The tape I asked you
to get 30 seconds ago.

I, uh, um, forgot.

Never mind.

Burne wants us back
at Channel 6 on the double.

Oh, boy!

Wait'll the squad leader
finds out

that I, Butch O'Reilly,

have captured four
green monsters.

You'll probably get

the Congressional
Medal of Horror.

I'm gonna get a promotion
for catching you four green
monsters.

[busy signal]

Uh-oh, line's busy.

We'll, we're just gonna wait
until I can get through.

I don't suppose anybody
brought any magazines.
[busy signal]

Erma, how about
helping out a little.

Uh, no. Wait!

Uh-oh.
Oh, I gotta go.

Hey!
What's the matter
with you?

[groaning]

[van starting]

[tires screeching]
Oh, dear.

I better go ask
that Shredder person
what to do next.

Hey!
Can anybody hear me?

Let me out of here!

[Krang cackling]

The mutagen is
almost decontaminated!

[Shredder]
At last you're back!

Did you get
the Byndex 3?

[stammering]
No.

Well, where is it?

Well, somewhere
in the city in a truck

that says, uh,
Channel 5-- No, 6,
on the side of it.

What! Oh, no!

Well, don't panic.

Sooner or later,
it'll wind up back
at Channel 6.

All right, Seymour.

Here's what
you have to do.

I don't know what's
gotten into Erma,

running off like that.

Hmm, how did this thing
get in here?

"Byndex 3."

[gasps]

This is the chemical

that was almost
stolen earlier!

And Erma was carrying it.

Why did you leave
without me, April?

Leave without you?

You ran away!

How could I run away
when I was in a closet?

How could you be in a closet
when you were giving me
this thing?

April, I was locked
in a closet

ever since you asked me
to find some tape for you.

Oh, by the way,
here it is.

There's something very fishy
going on here.

Let's get the Turtles
in on this.

[busy signal]

Still busy.

We're getting old

waiting for that
nerf head

to tell everybody
how great he is.

[line ringing]
Ah, at last,
I got through.

Hello, Chief,
it's O'Reilly.

I just caught
four green monsters

[Turtlecom beeping]
in the basement of
the Ace Scientific Company.

Guys, there's something weird
going on here at Channel 6.

And, like, we're living
normal boyhood lives,
right?

We were hoping
to get a lead

on whoever tried to steal
that Byndex 3,

but we've been stuck
in this basement
for an hour.

I've got the Byndex 3.

Whoa, you win
the weirdness prize,
dudette.

We better get over
to channel 6.

Come on, Turtles,
we can make it past
that turkey.

But Chief,
I'm not crazy!
[metal clattering]

You come down here,

and if I'm not holding
four green monsters,

I'll turn in my badge.

Oh, no!

Now, how am I
gonna get in there?

I'll make myself
look like one of
those four freaks.

[groaning]

[Donatello]
You know, I just
can't help feeling

there's something
strange going on.

You're imagining things,
dude.

How April got that Byndex 3,
now that's strange.

[stammering]
Uh-oh.

What do you mean,
"Uh-oh?"

How should I know?
I didn't say it.

[stammering]

I've gotta keep them
away from the Byndex 3.

Aha!

Help! Somebody!

I'm stuck in traffic,
and I can't get out!

We'll help you, lady!

Cowabunga!

What happened, ma'am?

A robber stole my purse.

I chased him
and got caught in traffic.

He went in there.
Come on! Let's go!

He just jumped
in there.

I don't see anything.

Oh, I think
you will.

[shouting]

Hey!
Let us out of here!
Let us out!

Now, to take care
of the other two.

[groaning]

Up there, look!

Isn't that fellow up there
in mortal danger?

Mortal danger?

Are you sure you're
feeling okay,
Michelangelo?

No, I think
he's right.
Come on!

I'd better look more normal.

Your talk show is getting
lousy ratings, Vernon.

I'll do better, Chief.
You'll see.

Maybe I'll talk faster...

or slower.

Oh, excuse me.

My, what a handsome
fellow.

Hey, Vernon,

I hear your talk show's
about to be cancelled.

[stammering]

I really don't care.
The Scientific Company called

and asked me
to bring this back.

This is very weird.
I'll say.

Since when would Vernon
not care about his show
being cancelled?

No, I mean that canister.

Why would they ask him
to bring it back?

I'm gonna follow him.

There he is!

Hey, mister,
are you all right?

What do you mean?
Of course, I'm all right.

[gasps]

At least I was all right.

Help!

We're under attack
from alien monsters!

[shouting]

I've got to get this stuff
back to that Shredder person.

Oh, dear.

[screaming]

Oh, no!

Oh, I'm sorry, ma'am.

But they said to make sure
no one followed me.

Who are you?

Better yet, what are you?

I am a delivery man

with the Fly By Night
messenger service.

Boy, they must have
one strange hiring policy.

Oh, by the way,
nice meeting you.

[April screaming]

Help!

There has to be
an easier way to make
a living.

And a lot safer one!

There's been a mistake.
We thought you needed help!

Yeah, well, you look
like alien invaders to us.

Alien invaders?

Don't you guys
watch television?

Sure, and the first thing
you aliens do is learn
our language.

We've just gotta get
out of here!

Let's go!

Go for it!

[Both]
Turtle power!

Boy, I wish you guys
would quit goofing off.

[Turtlecom beeping]

April, what's up?

I'm gonna be sliced
and diced if you guys
don't get over

to the East River Sky Tram
in about one minute!

That's only a few blocks
from here.

I think I'm about to get
a grinding headache.

[All]
It's Turtle time!

How are we gonna stop
this thing?

The controls are all
on the other side of
the river.

Maybe we can't stop it,

but we can jam it.
[metal grinding]

Oh, why must they always
cut these things so close?

[Krang]
There!

The mutagen is pure
once more.

But we don't have
the Byndex 3.

It's still unstable
without it.

We'll add it
when we pump the mutagen

into the rocket's fuel tanks,

if that idiot
ever gets back with it.

Hey, guys!
I got it!

[Krang]
Hurry! We must get
to the rocket

before it launches!

Hey! What about me?

You promised to turn me
back to normal.

[sobbing]

I still have
this letter to deliver

to the Touch of Romance
flower shop.

And it's a rush order.

Sorry, Seymour.

We don't have time.

[laughing]
Hey! No!

No! Don't leave me!

[sobbing]

[groaning]

Poor fellow.

Without a steady supply
of mutagen,

he'll go all to pieces.

[cackling]

[April]
It looked like he was living
off a supply of mutagen.

If that's true,
he might be able

to make himself
look like anybody.

And that's why he was
after the Byndex 3.

His mutations aren't
permanent without it.

[April]
He said he was going
to this old chemical plant.

Huh?
Huh?

[Raphael]
Uh, that wouldn't be him
by any chance, would it?

Whoa!

Major gross out!

It's mutagen!

Don't let it touch you!

I'll handle this.

Oh-- Oh, thanks.

Whew, I needed that.

Who the heck are you,
mutadude?

I am Seymour Guts,

mild-mannered delivery man,

although my friends say

I'm lots of laughs
at a party.

[chuckles]

Okay, great.
Just cut to the chase.

Oh, yes, of course.

Well, I fell into
this vat of glop

those weird guys
had made.

I had to steal
the Byndex 3 for them,

or else I couldn't change
back to normal permanently.

But then they left
without giving me any.

Where'd they go?

Oh, to some rocket launching.

They said they were gonna put
the mutagen in the fuel tanks.

That would blast
a mutagen vapor trail
over the entire city.

Everyone will turn
into a mutant.

We've gotta stop them!

And Seymour,
you're gonna help us.

Bebop, Rocksteady...

keep a lookout
while I deal
with the mutagen.

Okay, boss.

I don't want you
to mess things up
again, Shredder.

I came to supervise personally.

I can't tell you
how glad that makes me.

Gee, I sure am hungry.

Me, too.

Maybe there's
a candy machine
around here.

Surprise, picklepuss!

[clank]
Ooh, why, you little creep!

Hey.

Hope you don't mind
being hogtied.

Okay, Seymour,
you know what to do.

[grunting]

You turkeys won't get away
with copying me.

We'll pump the mutagen
into the fuel tanks first,

then add the Byndex 3.

Hey, Krang.
What is it?

Can't you see I'm busy?

There's something
I gotta show you over here.

Oh, very well.
What is it?

You'll find out.

What in blazes...

[Turtles]
Turtle power!

Okay, Seymour,
time for phase two.

You won't get away
with this, you imposters!

No, no!

Connect the mutagen
to this hose!

But you just said--

Never mind what I said.

Do as I say.

I wish you'd
make up your mind.

This is no time
to goof off.

I need your help!

Shredder, you fool!

That's not me,
it's Seymour!

What?

Then, what was this hose
I pumped all the mutagen
through?

You just dumped
the mutagen

into the Central-Matic
Disposal System,

where it'll never harm
anyone again.

You two-toed twit!

I'll make you
suffer for this!

[Female Voice]
12 seconds to launch.

10, 9, 8, 7...

[Bebop]
Hurry, before we get toasted!

[Female Voice]
2, 1, 0.

[Donatello]
Okay, Seymour,

this is your last mutation,
so make it a good one.

Gee, I, uh...

I can't remember
what I look like.

Let me have your wallet.

There must be a photo
on your driver's license.

Hey, you don't look
anything like your photo.

Oh, come on.

I may be a nerd,
but I am not stupid.

Now, can anyone
tell me how to get

to the Touch of Romance
flower shop?

[All]
Huh?

Well, here you go, dudes,
fresh from the oven.

Mm, there's nothing
like a bubbling pizza

after a long day of making
the world safe from tyrants.

Hey, guys, we're missing
April's 6:00 report.

And so, the rocket launch
was a total success,

which is why yours truly
is about to celebrate

with a night on the town.

Ready, Seymour?

Ready, April.

What?
Oh, no, April!

Turn it off!

♪♪ [theme]