07x13 - April Gets in Dutch

[bunniefuu]

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in a half-shell
Turtle power! ♪

♪ They're the world's
Most fearsome fighting team ♪

LEONARDO:
We're really hip.

♪ They're heroes
In the half-shell ♪

♪ And they're green ♪

RAPHAEL:
Hey, get a grip.

♪ When the evil Shredder
Attacks ♪

♪ These Turtle boys
Don't cut him no slack ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Splinter taught them to be
Ninja teens ♪

LEONARDO:
He's a radical rat.

♪ Leonardo leads
Donatello does machines ♪

DONATELLO:
That's a fact, Jack.

♪ Raphael is cool but crude ♪
RAPHAEL: Give me a break.

♪ Michelangelo is a party
Dude ♪
MICHELANGELO: Party!

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in a half-shell ♪

♪ Turtle power! ♪

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

This extraordinarily
powerful weapon

was used by
the Earl of Smothingham

in the famous siege
of Devon Castle.

[SNORING]

[CLEARS THROAT]

Michelangelo, wake up.

Wha-- Huh? Is it over yet?

I hope I didn't spoil
the gentlemen's little nap.

Uh, no problemo, dude.
I can sleep through anything.

Oh, don't mind him.
Go on with your lecture,

it's very interesting.

Ahem. Very well.

As I was saying...

Oh, this is mondo boring.

I gotta get outta here.

There's my ride.

Come on, Michelangelo,
stay for a little history, huh?

No way, amigo. As far as
these English castles go,

I'm history.

It was April 13th, 1572,

at 2:00 in the morning,

or perhaps it was 2:30
in the morning.

Cowabunga!

I say, what's he doing?

Aw, he just caught
an early flight.

DONATELLO:
Hey, this Duke of Earl Hotel
is pretty nice, huh, guys?

RAPHAEL:
It's alright.
But one hotel sewer

is pretty much like another.

That's what you think.

Room service, governor.

Thanks.

Sewer room service?
I'm impressed.

I'll have to pass
on the pizza, guys,

I'm heading down to Oxford
to tape an interview

with a famous British historian.

So long, April.
See ya at the end of the show.

SPLINTER:
Welcome back, my students.

And how was
your historical tour?

Pretty bogus, sensei.

If I never see
another old building

it'll be just fine by me.

You should take more
of an interest

in history, Michelangelo.

Remember, the seeds of tomorrow

are contained in
the apple core of yesterday.

I've always said that.

Well, let's catch a little
modern history on the tube.

Like some cartoons.

Officials at Greenwich
Observatory announced that

the most advanced
atomic clock in the world,

capable of accuracy
to the millionth of a second,

has gone on display.

Wow. I'd love to go see it.

Hey, you guys want
to come along?

Sure, dude. As long as
it's not in an old building.

[♪♪♪]

Watch out for
the laser-beam alarm system.

What lasers?

The ones you're
about to step in.

MICHELANGELO:
Oh, those lasers.

Great. The switch
is across the room.

Never fear,
Michelangelo is here.

Ta-da!

DONATELLO:
The alarm is off.

Good work, Michelangelo.

[BEEPING]

You know, this is a real,
state-of-the-art device.

[WHIRRING]

Whoa.
Hang on.

Whoa! No more fish and chips
pizza for me.

DONATELLO:
Look at this place.

Everything has changed.

Look, gas lamps on the wall.

Great, another old building.

[BRITISH ACCENT]
I'll take that.

MICHELANGELO:
Who's that?

He's got the atomic clock.

Hey, come back here, you.

I'll stop that dude.

Fools. You dare to interfere

with Professor Moriarty?

DONATELLO:
Look out, smoke b*mb!

Yes.

[ALL COUGHING]

RAPHAEL:
Ow, my foot.

I hate it when they do that.

Hello, hello, hello,
what's all this now?

LEONARDO:
That man is getting away
with the atomic clock.

And just who might you be?

Oh, we're the Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles.

This here's the Observatory.
We can't have turtles--

Turtles?

MICHELANGELO:
Whoa, gnarly whiskers, dude.

[YELPS]

I always said you had a face

only a mother turtle
could love.

Did you see the way
he was dressed?

Never mind him, we've got
to get the atomic clock back.

[♪♪♪]

Now we've got him.

Stop. Stop, I say.

He's headed for
the carriage, Holmes.

RAPHAEL:
The clock thief has got help.

DONATELLO:
I'll stop them.

By Jove?
I say.

He's getting away.

Out of the way.

Oh, no, you don't.

Not bad for a turtle.

Not bad for a skinny Englishman.

[GROANING]

My ankle.

Better luck next time,
Mr. Holmes.

[SNICKERING]

MICHELANGELO:
Bummer. He got away.

Did he say, Holmes?

Mr. Sherlock Holmes,
you nitwit.

And you just kept him from
capturing Professor Moriarty,

the most dangerous criminal
in all of Europe.

Get real, weirdly dressed dudes,

this is 20th century.

This is the 19th century.


No way. This is some
kind of trick.

Wait a minute, guys,
think about it.

When we were in the observatory
everything changed,

the gas lamps, the watchman's
clothes, and all this.

Who could pull such a trick?

Somehow we're in
the 19th century.

Uh, I hate to bother you dudes
with stupid questions.

That never stopped you before.

But if we're in
the 19th century,

how are we going to get home?

It was have happened
just before Moriarty

grabbed the atomic clock,

when everything kind
of swirled around.

You are pursuing
Moriarty as well?

My apologies, gentlemen--

Uh, mutant turtles,
I believe. Originally:

[SPEAKS IN LATIN]

A very successful mutation.

Talking turtles. Incredible.

You're really Sherlock Holmes?

Oh. I'm honored.

Thanks, old chap, but I'm afraid
we've no time for pleasantries.

Moriarty is plotting
something monstrous

and you may be the very fellows
to help me unravel his plan.

Would you fellows care
to join me in a cup of tea?

Sure, if you think
we'll all fit. Ha-ha-ha.

I know it's an old joke,
but I couldn't resist.

Wow, 221B Baker Street.

A humble house, but mine own.

Come in.

Those will be the last guests

you'll ever have,
Mr. Nosy Holmes.

Truly awesome crumpets, dude.

Only--
Only, what, Michelangelo?

Well, they'd be
totally bodacious

with a little tomato paste
and cheese.

HOLMES:
Time to move
the bust again, Dr. Watson.

WATSON:
Righto, Holmes.

What's he doing that for?

[BRITISH ACCENT]
Elementary, my dear
Michelangelo.

[NORMAL VOICE]
Anyone looking at the window

will think that Mr. Holmes
is sitting there.

Very good, Leonardo.

Since I've been
on Professor Moriarty's trail

there have been several
attempts on my life.

And Moriarty uses a nasty weapon

he calls an air-g*n cane.

Silent, but deadly.

Goodbye, Mr. Holmes.

[LAUGHS]

[KNOCK AT DOOR]

I wonder who that could be
at this hour.

Lestrade, what a surprise.

Well, I see you have
company, Mr. Holmes.

Marvelous deduction. Come in.

Inspector Lestrade
of Scotland Yard, of course.

We know all about you.

You were in Sherlock Holmes
and the Spiderwoman.

A primo flick, compadre.

Trust me, Lestrade

and tell my friends
about Professor Moriarty.

Well, the professor has been
stealing scientific equipment

from all over Europe.

And rumor in the underworld is

he's going to make something
to steal the 20th century.

With the shape it's in, maybe we
ought to let him have it.

Earlier this evening he tapped
the power of a lightening storm

to travel to your time

to steal this
atomic clock of yours.

[WHISTLES]

This dude is clever.

How'd he know about it
if it hasn't been invented yet?

Principle was known
by the early 19th century.

I'll bet Moriarty just figured
out where and when it would be,

waited for the right moment
and grabbed it.

I had planned to go to Oxford
to search for his hideout

while Watson assisted
Lestrade here in London.

But now I need help.

No problemo, dude.

We're your turtles.

[♪♪♪]

The air-g*n cane.
Down, everyone.

[THUD]

There. He's gone.

Mondo bummer.

Make no mistake,
my green allies,

Moriarty is a cruel
and implacable foe.

[TRAIN CHUGGING]

Professor Moriarty used to
teach science here at Oxford.

I'll bet his hideout is near
the Oxford Science Museum.

That way he has access to the
scientific equipment he needs.

[BELLS TOLLING]

There they go.

Those th*gs. After them!

What are you scoping out, amigo?

That one tough got covered
with soot on the train roof too.

I'm following his trail of soot.

If I'm right that's
the Science Museum over--

Air-g*n cane!

There he goes.

Down that alleyway.

Where's he go?

LEONARDO:
Here are some fresh footprints.
Our man must have gone in here.

Well, let's go.

LEONARDO:
Hm. Now to find
a secret entrance

to Professor Moriarty's lab.

How do you know it's got
a secret entrance?

Raphael, all these villains
have secret entrances

to their hideouts.
It's in their contracts.

Gee, this makes me homesick
for the sewers.

This wall is
the secret entrance.

How do you know?

[BRITISH ACCENT]
Elementary, my dear Raphael.

[NORMAL VOICE]
The groove marks indicate that
this wall is slid over it.

And I'll bet
there's latch right here.

Elementary, my dear--

Yeah, we know, we know.

MORIARTY:
Welcome, my green friends.

Moriarty.

My compliments to Holmes,

instead of bloodhounds
he uses talking turtles.

Enough chitchat, professor.

Hand over that atomic clock.

I'm afraid I can't do that.

You see, this clock
is the final component

for my time machine.

You're crazy.

No one can change history.

Oh, but you're wrong.

When I'm through Holmes
will never have been born

and I will rule the world.

Cheerio, chaps.

Quick, outside.

Look at that telephone.

And that truck.

We're in our own time again.

[CROWD]:
Hail!

Whoa, sounds like
a rock concert.

Let's go check it out.

MAN [OVER PA]:
All hail

the Emperor of the World.

Emperor of what?

His Imperial highness,
Moriarty the First.

[CHEERING]

This is the 20th century,
all right.

And it belongs to Moriarty.

[CHEERING]

Don't look now, dudes,
but we're in the wrong 1991.

CROWD:
Hail Moriarty. Hail Moriarty.

LEONARDO:
He did it. He changed history.

DONATELLO:
Well, it's time
to change it right back.

I think he heard that.

Seize those traitors.

Halt and be punished.

Let's get out of here.

[♪♪♪]

Split up, they can't get far.

Hey, dudes, over here.

[YELLING]

Oh, don't worry, we won't say,
have a nice trip.

[ZAPPING]

Any bright ideas,
glorious leader?

Yes, run faster.

[RUMBLING]

MICHELANGELO:
Now what, amigos?

LEONARDO:
Jump!

They'd done for.
Let's report in.

[PANTING]

Being a turtle comes in handy.

Yeah, it doesn't mean
you have to like it.

APRIL [BRITISH ACCENT]:
Psst. Over here.

Hurry, before
the troopers come back.

Look, dudes, it's April.

But not the April we know.

This is not our world, remember?

RAPHAEL:
Thanks for saving us...April.

How do you know my name?

Well, we met in another time.

How come you're helping us?

Anyone running from Moriarty's
troopers has to be a friend.

Even someone green.

Come and meet more of those
opposed to Moriarty's rules.

Another secret passage?

This is becoming
a regular spy story.

[BRITISH ACCENT]
Stop there.
Let April go, go, go.

Relax, guys, they're friends.

How can anyone such a disgusting
shade of green be a friend?

Fellows, I'd like you to meet--

We know, Vernon, Vernon.

How is it possible?

VERNON:
You better explain yourselves,

and quick, quick, quick.

We'd be glad to,
but it's a long story.

Is this gonna be a flashback?

Nah, just a dissolve.

So our only hope
of getting back to our 1991

is to find Moriarty's
time machine.

You're in luck then,
we know where it is.

Way to go, dude,
we can use some good news.

Emperor Moriarty keeps
the time machine on display

at the Imperial Science Museum.

We know a secret way in.

APRIL:
It's right above us.

The Science Museum's up there.

[RUMBLING]
Is it an attack?

Uh, my stomach.

I've got a humongous
case of the munchies.

What did he say?

He's hungry.

I'm afraid all I have
is an apple.

MICHELANGELO:
Well, pizza would be better,
but thanks.

[CHOMPING]

Mondo delicioso, April.

No sense leaving any evidence

for Moriarty's troopers
to track us with.

I have to warn you,
if we succeed

you and your friends
may never exist.

Well, it'll be worth it

just to rid the world
of Emperor Moriarty.

Besides, we all know
one another in your time.

[CAMERA FLICKERING]

[BEEPING]

So far so good.

Donatello,
what do we have to do?

Well, we crank up
Moriarty's time machine,

go back to our own time,

and stop Moriarty
before he grabs the clock.

Sounds simple to me.

Ha-ha-ha. And how do you
turtles like my future?

About as much as you're going
to like yours, Moriarty.

I knew you'd try
to get my time machine.

I've been expecting you.

[CLANGING]

First, I'm going to
have some fun with you.

Then you can spend
the rest of your lives

chopping stone for my pyramids.

Chop this, Buzzard-Breath.

[YELPS]

[♪♪♪]

[GRUNTS]
You fight well, turtle.

Because I have right on my side.

Don't you just love the way
he says those lines?

I'll hold them off, amigo,

you get to the time machine.
Right.

[BEEPING]

I did it. Now what?

Any time now, Donatello.

No. Stop.

Look out!

[WHIRRING]

Nice save, Leonardo.

Ah, thank goodness.

The atomic clock is safe.

Clock, schmock, we're safe.

Phew. Totally awesome trip,
dudes.

But is that dude, Moriarty,
out of the picture, or what?

I'll take that.

Professor Moriarty.

I think that's, "or what?"

[♪♪♪]

[GRUNTS]

Get off, you're squashing me.

Good, let us know when
you're nice and flat.

Where'd he go?

He must have been pulled
back to his own time.

Did he get the clock?

No way, dudes.

Good work, Michelangelo.

Sherlock Holmes would
have been proud of you.

He'd have been proud of us all.

Hello, hello, hello.

How come he never says
hello to me?

[CLOCK BEEPING]
Oh, no, not again.

There you are, my students.

[NORMAL VOICE]
Hi, we've been wondering
where you were.

Actually, it's more like
when we were.

This sounds interesting.

I think I'll make
a tape of this story.

An apple core? What on earth
is this doing in my bag?

That's not possible.

You see, my students,

the seeds of tomorrow
are contained

in the apple core of yesterday.

TURTLES:
Ah, no!

What on earth got into them?

Perhaps they had too much
time on their hands.

[♪♪♪]