04x09 - King of the Road

[bunniefuu]

[Shriek]

[Shriek]

Ah ha ha ha ha ha! Ah ha ha ha ha ha! Stella! Stella! Oh! Hello,plaguegoers.

I was just rehearsing with my little theater group.

I just love theslimelight.

For tonight's dreary drama, I thought we'd try anexscarimentalpiece about a retired drag racer who's afraid of getting to thefinishedline a little sooner than he wants.

I call this nasty nugget king of the road.

King of the road.

[Brakes screech]

Oh, yeah! Hey, hey! Rev it, man! [Engines revving]

[Engines revving]

Rollin' down the highway going down the red coast going down the red coast devil take the road most any way the wind blows devil take the road most any way the wind blows gonna see my baby, gonna sh**t my load yeah j& bad road, wretched road j& j& bad road, wretched road j& got a little world that's smaller than my hand got a little world that's smaller than my hand got a destination down in dead man's land got a destination down in dead man's land gonna see my baby, gonna sh**t my load gonna see my baby, gonna sh**t my load yeah j& bad road, wretched road j& whoo hoo hoo hoo! Bad road wretched road wretched road bad road, wretched road [horn honks]

See you later, daddy.

Will you be by tonight? Probably.

You got a ride home? No, but I will.

No, but I will.

Hello, down there.

I'm trying to track down this old boy supposed to live around here.

Who is that? I haven't actually met him yet.

Been kind of hard to track down.

Sweet car.

Is this yours? It's my daughter's.

Mine's out in the front.

It's my daughter's.

Mine's out in the front.

You're putting some muscle into this sweetheart, I like that.

I best be hittin' the road, I appreciate your time.

You didn't tell me who you're looking for.

Well, he's a real smart guy, real fast guy.

So they say.

What's his name? Iceman.

Iceman.

Hi, daddy.

Hi, sweetie.

The usual? Yeah.

Thanks, sweetheart.

Yeah.

Thanks, sweetheart.

Be back in a minute.

O.

K.

, Baby.

O.

K.

, Baby.

I'll be a snake on sunday.

Pop in here, who I do I see? The iceman.

How you doing? You got some names and faces confused, cowboy.

You got some names and faces confused, cowboy.

The name's joe
-
- Joe garrett.

You don't have to be modest, iceman.

You you're a legend.

I've heard stories about you.

Never lost a race, eight years straight.

King of the road.

King of the road.

Too bad it had to end the way it did.

Too bad it had to end the way it did.

I don't know who you are.

But I don't like you.

But I don't like you.

Hey, I don't mean nothing by it.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

But, you know what would be so cool? If I could get a chance to share some road with you, a straight quarter
-mile.

You got the wrong guy.

[Police radio]

Unit 14, see the man, main and sixth.

Code 3.

Main and sixth.

Code 3.

I've been dreamin' of a night with you of a night with you hi.

Hi.

He had to take off.

It happens all the time.

It happens all the time.

Why don't you take it? Why don't you take it? You got your dad's eyes.

I'll keep dreamin' I'll keep dreamin' will you come by tomorrow? Will you come by tomorrow? Yeah, I'll come.

Yeah, I'll come.

[Stomp]

[Stomp]

On the house.

On the house.

Guess I owe you one.

Guess you do.

Guess you do.

Comin' tonight? Mmhm.

Mmhm.

Come on, iceman.

Where are you? [Siren]

[Siren]

[Rock music plays]

I'm in pursuit of a 1969 chevy, I
-v
-b
-n
-5
-3
-6.

Give me a make.

Roger, unit 14.

Roger, unit 14.

Suspect is william h.

Drake.

Lives in tackford.

Has a long rap sheet
-
- Reckless driving, as*ault, and a manslaughter charge that didn't stick.

He's the hottest street racer there.

You need any backup, garrett? You need any backup, garrett? Negative.

This one's mine.

Negative.

This one's mine.

[Whistling]

[Whistling]

[Honk]

[Honk]

[Police radio]

Roger, unit 14.

You're a 10
-7 at that location.

Have a nice day off, garrett.

Have a nice day off, garrett.

Carey? Carey? Daddy! [Door opens]

[Door opens]

Hi, joe.

Uh! Daddy, what are you doing? Stay away from him, carey.

No! Why are you hitting him? Nothing happened! I brought her home.

That's all! Don't hit him again! Get out of my way! He's using you.

Come on, joe.

That's it! Come on, joe.

That's it! Go to your room.

It's all right, carey, I'll go.

Then I'm coming with you.

The hell you are, move! Billy! Ah, come on, joe! Come on this is getting old.

You can't arrest me, man.

Come on! Come on! Do you know how bad it will be when middleton finds out one of its finest has been dodging a manslaughter charge for 27 years, joe? Huh? A single parent, too, joe.

If you get 5 to 10 if you get 5 to 10 who's going to take care of carey? Who's going to take care of carey? Aw, don't look so down, joe.

You're tearing me up, here.

You're tearing me up, here.

You should have known I'd come along sooner or later.

Be a man about it.

Be a man about it.

Just just think of me as your karma, joe.

Ha ha ha! Karma? O.

K.

O.

K.

Just you and me on the starting line, joe.

That's all.

That's all.

Yeah.

That's all.

That's all.

[Door opens and shuts]

[Door opens and shuts]

[Spits]

[Spits]

Billy, wait.

Billy, wait.

I'm coming with you.

Hop in, beautiful.

Hop in, beautiful.

How you doing, billy? Glad you could make it, joe.

Glad you could make it, joe.

You want to race, billy? You name the place.

I'll name the time.

All right.

Airstrip outside of town.

Airstrip outside of town.

Tomorrow night.

Midnight.

Now, where's my daughter? Oh, your daughter.

Oh, your daughter.

Well, joe, tell you something about your daughter.

She was starting to get a real bad attitude.

Women, huh? Women, huh? Well, it don't matter.

Nothing a few chains couldn't handle.

Fits perfectly back there, just like a little spare tire.

Whoa! [c*ck g*n]

Now's not the time to lose our cool, iceman.

Won't do any of us any good.

Won't do any of us any good.

Ah, joe, I hate to treat you like this.

You think I'm just going to hand her over to you expecting you to show up.

I can't see it.

What are you saying, billy? What are you saying, billy? I'm says she's the stakes.

I'm says she's the stakes.

You win, you get her back.

And if I lose.

I'll have to k*ll her won't i.

And joe, I wouldn't go to any of your cop buddies.

Because I'm not only smart but I'm crazy.

But I'm crazy.

[Slide guitar playing]

[Slide guitar playing]

Hey, old buddy.

Holy moses! I don't believe it.

Joe, is it really you? It's me, man.

Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Eight ba*ls in hell I knew you'd come back.

One day I said he's gone come riding out of oblivion, just like shane, and that road is gonna burn! Just like shane, and that road is gonna burn! Moe, I gotta know, is she still there? Moe, I gotta know, is she still there? I polished her up every six months like clockwork, thinking you might come back.

Thinking you might come back.

[Revs engine]

Kept her tuned up, too! Kept her tuned up, too! Johnny never knew what hit him johnny never knew what hit him when he first met julia when he first met julia he used to be so wild and free next in line.

Time treats everybody like a fool [engine revving]

[Engine revving]

Johnny had a '57 chevy johnny had a '57 chevy 4 on the floor and a 429 4 on the floor and a 429 we used to take it out on wild horse pike run it out to the end of the line you got to roll with the punches you got to roll with the punches when the sun is sinkin' low when the sun is sinkin' low you got to roll with the punches you got to roll with the punches or, honey, we ain't never goin' home yeah yeah joe, you old dog.

I knew you had this puppy stowed somewhere.

You ready, billy? You ready, billy? Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Had some fun, didn't we, sweetheart? Had some fun, didn't we, sweetheart? Go on.

Go on.

Give it to carey.

Give it to carey.

[c*ck g*n]

[c*ck g*n]

No, carey.

Get in front of the cars.

When we flash our brights, raise the g*n and fire once in the air.

Raise the g*n and fire once in the air.

Daddy, are you crazy? Do it.

Do it.

You know, billy, you win, you go free.

And if I lose? I'll k*ll you.

I'll k*ll you.

I respect you, joe.

I respect you, joe.

Rollin' down the highway going down the red coast going down the red coast devil take the road most any way the wind blows devil take the road most any way the wind blows gonna see my baby, gonna sh**t my load yeah bad road, wretched road bad road, wretched road got a little world that's smaller than my hand got a little world that's smaller than my hand got a destination down in dead man's land got a destination down in dead man's land gonna see my baby, gonna sh**t my load yeah bad road wretched road wretched road bad road wretched road wretched road no! No! Looks like you win, iceman.

Looks like you win, iceman.

Wrong.

Wrong.

You got to roll with the punches you got to roll with the punches when the sun is sinkin' low when the sun is sinkin' low you got to roll with the punches you got to roll with the punches or, honey, we ain't never goin' home or, honey, we ain't never goin' home well, that certainly gives new meaning to the term "burn rubber.

" Hee hee hee! As for me, I've got to get back to work.

The group has decided to do something classical.

We're trying to choose between a midsummer
-night's scream andghoulius caesar.

Hee hee hee hee hee! Care to watch fromhackstage? Ah ha ha ha ha! You know what they say, kiddies theslay'sthe thing.

Ah ha ha ha ha ha! Ah ha ha ha ha ha!