01x03 - Adventures in Bobby Sitting

[bunniefuu]

-Oh, I love to dance.


Welcome to "Bobby's World."


Don't you hate it when your
parents go out dancing?

Because that way, they always
have to hire a babysitter.

Gee, if I'm going
out dancing, I'd

better change into a cartoon.


[FLASH]


HOWARD [OFFSCREEN]: Bobby?


-What?


Choo-choo!


No, no, look out!


Dinosaur on the track!


[CRASH]


-Bobby, I want you to come
downstairs and meet the, uh,

babysitter.


-Not the babysitter!


Oh, no!


[THUD]


-Bummer.


This means my parents
are going out without me.

I'm gonna be left all
alone with a stranger.

Give up yet?


[THEME MUSIC]


[ROGER BARKING]


MARTHA [OFFSCREEN]: Bobby,
it's the babysitter!

-I know.


[DING]


RING ANNOUNCER
[OFFSCREEN]: Round 1 --

The Babysitter Arrives.


[DOORBELL]


MARTHA [OFFSCREEN]: Well, Bobby,
answer the gee golly door.

-Why?


It didn't ask me a question.


MARTHA [OFFSCREEN]:
Bobby, let her in!

[WHIMPERS]


-Babysitters are an
invention of parents

to keep us kids
from having any fun.

[GRUMBLES]


[DOORBELL]


-Who'd they get
for me this time?

It's probably a prison guard.


-I'm your babysitter, boy.


Just so we have no
failure to communicate,

I only have one rule.


It's my rule.


And my rule is, kids
stay in their cell

until their parents come home.


Right, boy?


Oh, yeah, and one more thing.


My name--


---is Natalie.


What's yours?


[BARKS]


-Depends, sir.


-Sir?


-I-- I-- mean, uh, Natalie.


-I never babysat before.


I usually earn my
money tutoring.

[WHIMPERS]


-If I'm late to my concert,
I'm coming right back home, OK?

-OK, OK.


Here we are, leaving for
Kelly's piano recital!

Come on, say something
to the camera, Kelly.

KELLY [OFFSCREEN]: Dad!


-Oh, now, come on, honey.


Back off here.


Now, you had the lens
cap on, for Pete's sakes.

HOWARD [OFFSCREEN]:
Sorry, honey.

KELLY [OFFSCREEN]: Oh, brother.


Dad, let's go.
MARTHA [OFFSCREEN]: Let's go.

You too, Kelly.


Come on here.


HOWARD [OFFSCREEN]: OK, OK, OK.


MARTHA [OFFSCREEN]:
Oh, and honey,

there's a number
by the phone there.

You can reach us in case
of an emergency, you know.

-Don't worry, Mrs. Generic.


I'm sure there won't
be any problems.

-What?


Problem are the only fun you
can have with a babysitter.

[DING]


-Round 2-- The Challenge.


In this corner, the
challenger, weighing

999 pounds of no
nonsense, Nasty Natalie!

[CROWD BOOS]


-I challenge you!


You're mine!


Nasty Natalie owns you.


In bed, 7:30.


No dinner, no dessert,
no TV, no fun.

You do what I tell you,
or you're road pizza!

I'm gonna come down so
hard on your fantasy,

you won't be able to dial 911!


-And in this corner, weighing
not very much, the kid who's

always being left
behind, Beastly Bobby!

[CROWD CHEERS]


-Sticks and stones
will break my bones,

but names will
never-- never mind.

-Ah, don't let her get to you.


She's all talk.


[THUMPING]


-Mmm, talk?


You're darn right I'll talk.


If you do anything, I'll
call your mother so fa-- hey,

I thought your name
was Beastly Bobby.

What's that D on your head?


-Yeah.


Wha-- what's the D for?


-Dork.


-Oh.


OK.


Ahh!


-Grr!


You just try to go outside.


You'll never get past me.


-Don't call me, I'll call you.


Ha ha!


-You're going to bed!


Now!


Whoa!


[CROWD CHEERS]


RING ANNOUNCER [ON
TV]: And Dynamic Dan

had got Vicious Vic
in a stepover toehold!

-Bobby!


Bobby, cut it out!


-Huh?


RING ANNOUNCER [ON TV]:
The referee's counting.

One, two--


-We better turn this off.


This wrestling junk
is freaking Bobby out.

-Aw, man.


Just when it was getting good.


-Well, whenever I'm
too jazzed, I read.

-I think we should
have a rematch.

-"Therefore, the study of
geomorphology is the study

of the Earth's surface, while
climatology is the study

of climatic conditions."


-Derek, do you want a pillow?


-Sure.


Thanks.


-Natalie, would
you like a pillow?

-Why, yes, Bobby.


Thank you.


"So from the military
geography, we get the term--"

-Pillow fight!


Attack, attack!


-Counterattack!


-Ow!
Ooh!

Ow!


-Stop!


Cut it out!


-Ha, ha, ha!


I got you.


-Go, go, go!


NATALIE [OFFSCREEN]:
Hey, you brats, stop it!

That's enough!


Clean up this mess, or I'm
going to call your parents.

-If she calls Mom and
Dad, this means w*r.

-w*r could be fun.


-I can't believe it!


She actually called them.


She actually called Mom and Dad!


Over what, a stupid
pillow fight?

Get in here, wiener brain!


It's all your fault!


-It wasn't my fault.


It was Roger's!


Get in here, wiener breath!


-What are we gonna do?


I mean, we can't sit
in my room all night.

-I got an idea.


Follow me to the kitchen.


RING ANNOUNCER [OFFSCREEN]:
Round 3-- Bobby's Idea.

-Come on, don't give up.


We've almost got the
cherry to the top.

Roger, what do you see?


-It's the Abominable Natalie!


-Get away from the ice cream!


It'll spoil your dinner!


-Whoa, that was very close.


-Oh, no!


[SCREAMS]


NATALIE [OFFSCREEN]: Are
you eating ice cream?

-Fudge.


-What are you stooges doing
in here, making a mess?

-You can tell that Natalie
is almost an adult.

She's asking stupid
questions that she already

knows the answer to.


-Aww, now, I have a mess
in the kitchen to clean up.

Why are you giving
me such a hard time?

I didn't do anything to you.


-Derek said you
called Mom and Dad.

-I didn't call your parents.


I was trying to
reach my boyfriend.

-Close your eyes.


I don't want you
to see me naked.

-OK, get in the bath.


-Good.


Now, give me your arm.


-OK.


-Good.


Now, your other arm.


-Here.


-See?


Taking a bath isn't so bad.


-Yeah.


Ow, there's soap in my eye!


-Here.


Now, how's that?


BOBBY [OFFSCREEN]: Thank you.


-Now, dry yourself off.


Are you done?


-Yup.


All done.


You can open your eyes now.


-Now, that wasn't
so bad, was it?

-Natalie, that's the
best bath I ever had.

No!


GAME SHOW HOST [ON TV]: Welcome
back to "Family Trouble!"

Our two teams are tied.


But in the second
round, every question

is worth double dollars--


[DING]


GAME SHOW HOST [ON TV]:
--or Family Trouble.

[BUZZ]


-That's it.


I want you two to go to bed.


If you don't, it's trouble.


-It's not our bedtime.


-Round 4-- Playing
the Bedtime Game.

OK, Bobby.


The category is "What Time
Should You Go to Bed?"

Who do you want to start with?


BOBBY [OFFSCREEN]:
Uncle Ted to block!

-Good choice, Bobby.


I love that kid.


[CROWD LAUGHS]


-Uncle Ted, what time
should Bobby be in bed?

-Be in bed?


Why, I wouldn't go in there
if there was a bee in the bed.

[CROWD LAUGHS]


-But, uh, seriously, I think
Bobby should go to bed any time

he wants.


-Bobby?


-Um, I agree!


[BUZZ]


CROWD [OFFSCREEN]: Aw!


[CROWD LAUGHS]


-Goopy goopers!


That is definitely a stain.


-Aw!


-Natalie, you can take
it all if you're correct.

-Um, Mrs. Generic to win.


-Well, now, are we talking
a school night or a weekend?

That makes a big difference.


GAME SHOW HOST
[OFFSCREEN]: I believe

we're talking about
a school night.

-Oh.


Then it's 8 o'clock--
boom, in your room.

-I agree!


[DING]


-That's correct!


Wait a minute, there's been
a ruling by our judges.

Oh, since it's Bobby's fantasy--


[BUZZ]


GAME SHOW HOST
[OFFSCREEN]: --Bobby wins!

[CROWD CHEERS]


-Now that you've won, what
are you gonna do, Bobby?

-I'm gonna stay up
as late as I want!

[THUNDER]


[SCREAMS]


GIRL [ON TV]: Look out!


It's Mason!


[WHIMPERS]


-Um, I think your
parents told me

you're not supposed
to watch scary movies.

-Well, um, um, we-- we've seen
all 13 scary Mason movies.

[WHISPERING] Don't say a word.


-Yikes!


-Cool.


-That's it, time for bed.


-Oh, come on!


It was just getting good.


-Yeah, it was.


What happened?


[PHONE RINGS]


-I-- I-- I'll get it!


[PHONE RINGS]


-He's just leaving the
room 'cause he's scared.

[PHONE RINGS]


-Hello?


[HEAVY BREATHING]


-He-- he-- hel-- hel-- hello?


MASON [ON PHONE]: Sorry,
I'm a little out of breath.

Hello, is this one of the little
dude's Natalie's babysitting?

-Yeah, I'm Bobby.


Who's this?


MASON [ON PHONE]: I'm Mason.


Hi.


Tell Natalie I'm coming over.


Hello?


Hello?


-Ahh!


Mason's coming over!


MASON [ON PHONE]: Hello?


Hello?


NATALIE [OFFSCREEN]:
Bobby, who's on the phone?

-Natalie, it's Mason.


He says he's coming over!


-Never mind that.


Just go to bed.


Hello?


Oh, that was Bobby.


-Yeah, I made the team, babe.


Bonus, huh.


-That's great, Mason!


-I know.


I could come right
over if I don't change.

[ROCK MUSIC ON TV]


-It's Mason!


He's coming to get us!


-What are you so scared about?


There's no Mason,
you little dork.

He's only on the TV.


-I'm coming over to
get you and the punks.

NATALIE [OFFSCREEN]:
No, don't come over.

Their parents aren't
here, and-- Mason, no.

Don't come over.


-No!


No!


[THUNDER]


-Bobby!


Bobby!


Round 5-- The Chase is On.


-Told you he was real!


-I'll never call
you a liar again!

-Let's run.


Follow me!


[ROGER BARKING]


-You're all mine.


[THUNDER]


[ROGER BARKING]


-This is a
babysitting nightmare!

-Don't worry, I'll
save you, Natalie.

Quick, in here.


He can't find us in here.


Let me rephrase that.


Run!


[ROGER BARKING]


-Ooh.


Ahh!


[THUNDER]


-Ahh!


[RASPBERRY]


[THUNDER]


-Ah!


[THUNDER]


-Whoa!


Whoa!


Thanks.


-My pleasure.


-Hmm.


What a polite monster.


-Wait a minute.


Come back here.


Whee.


Whee.


[CRASH]


-Oh.


I bet that hurt.


Derek, Natalie, we got him!


-Bobby, Derek, get off Mason!


Get off my boyfriend right now!


[CRASH]


-This is my boyfriend Mason.


He's on the hockey team.


-Hey, gnarly little dudes.


Come on, two minutes
for high sticking.

-Wait, you're not Mason,
that hockey head on TV?

-What, you melonheads
thought I was

that slasher dude in the movies?


Heinous.


-Told you there was no
such thing as Mason.

Last time I ever
listen to you, dork.

-Boy, brothers can
sure be fickle.

RING ANNOUNCER [OFFSCREEN]:
Round 6-- The Wrap Up.

-Oh, I thought I
sent you two to bed.

I'm telling your parents.


-Go ahead.


They just drove up.


-Your parents!


-Oh, bogurama.


-Yeah.


Then you can explain
why Mason is here

when he's not
supposed to be here.

-Yeah, we're gonna tell on you.


Good one, Bobby.


-All right.


I won't tell on you guys
if you won't tell on me.

Deal?


DEREK AND BOBBY
[OFFSCREEN]: Deal.

-The backdoor is out
through the kitchen.

-Oh, gracias, amigo.


Later!


-Uh, we'll go to bed.


[DOOR OPENS]


-Uh, I'll clean up your mess.


-See how quickly
kids work together

when there are parents right
outside the front door?

-Bobby?


BOBBY [OFFSCREEN]: What?


-Bobby?


BOBBY [OFFSCREEN]: What?


-Bobby?


-That's my name.


-See, Bobby?


Having a babysitter
wasn't that bad, was it?

-No.


It was kind of fun.


-Eh?


So then you understand why
we have babysitters, huh?

-So kids can learn how
to-- how to negotiate?

-Gee whiz, sounds like
Bobby had a great time.

Well, that's it from
"Bobby's World."

And always remember-- because
that way, you'll never forget.

What?


[THEME MUSIC]