05x01 - Rupert and the Jolly Roger

[bunniefuu]

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(Laughing)

Yahoo!

Whee!

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Mmm! Butterscotch!

Strawberry!

Blueberry!

Mmm! Uh, I forget!

Your shirt may give you a clue.

I had to eat it quickly. It was melting!

(Laughing)

Look at this!

"The Great Mephisto! Magician extraordinaire!

Master of Hypnosis!"

It says the Great Mephisto

will give a free show tonight on the common!

You don't believe any of that hocus-pocus stuff, do you?

It's all a complete fake.

Don't be too sure, Bill!

Want to see a real magic trick I learned from my Uncle Hector?

Abracadabra! Presto!

Ha! Great trick, Podgy!

I'll say! Mmm!

Huh?

(Laughing)

The hand is quicker than the eye!

BILLAnd nothing is quicker than Podgy's stomach!

Let's meet back here,

right after we all make our suppers disappear!

All right! Bye!

Back in a flash!

(Crowd murmuring)

(Applause)

It's all done with mirrors.

Shh! Shh!

Welcome, one and all,

to tonight's performance of phantasmephisto!

First, the Great Mephisto shall amaze and astound,

with fabulous feats of prestidigitation!

(Applause)

He had them hidden up his sleeves.

Shh! Shh!

And now, prepare to witness the astounding,

mind-controlling powers

of the most mysterious of the ancient arts:

Hypnosis!

Who among you is brave enough to assist me?

Over here!

Oh, brother.

You!

Huh?

Me? Rupert's the one with his hand up!

What's the matter, Bill? Chicken?

(Laughing)

Ha! I'm not afraid!

Besides, hypnosis will never work on me.

Gaze deeply into my eyes...

your eyelids are getting heavy...

My mind is far too sharp to...

fall for... any sort of...

You must listen closely to my every word.

Airy-fairy... mumbo-jumbo...

(Snoring)

My mind controls your every thought.

My slightest wish is your command!

When you awaken, you shall be...

(Laughing)

(Clucking like a chicken)

Hey, Bill! I thought you said you weren't chicken!

(Clucking)

At least he's got a "bird's eye view" of the show!

Let's have a big hand for our volunteer.

(Applause)

Huh?

(Cheering)

I told you he couldn't hypnotize me!

Brilliant!

Bravo!

Encore!

Thank you! Thank you, my friends!

Why is everyone cheering for him?

I would love to stay,

but I cannot disappoint my fans in the next village.

Until next time I bid you, adieu!

Bye-bye! Thanks for the show!

Did I miss something?

(Laughing)

What's so funny?

It's a long story, Bill.

(Shouting)

I say! Perhaps we aren't the only victims!

(Shouting and arguing)

(Phone ringing)

CONSTABLE GROWLERYes, Ma'am. What's missing? I see.

P. C. Growler here. Yes, Sir, as soon as--

Now, no pushing! Of course I will.

I'm afraid there's been a series of robberies.

You too, Bill?


I don't believe it!

It seems everyone in Nutwood had something stolen last night!

(Whistle blowing)

Sorry about that. Ahem. Now then, Mr. Bear?

Unless I'm mistaken, you're here to report some stolen property.

Yes! This used to display my silver gardening trophy.

First prize for my Rhododendrons.

The secret is in the mulch, you see. Every autumn, I--

Just the facts, please.

Oh, yes, of course. Well, not much more to tell, really.

I came down to breakfast this morning and there it was, gone!

Any evidence of forced entry?

None! And no footprints, or any other clues.

And nothing else was stolen!

Whoever it was, knew exactly what they wanted.

They just walked in and helped themselves!

Hmm. That fits the modus operandi in all the other cases.

Very odd. Very odd, indeed.

A serious business this. Has all the earmarks of an inside job.

You mean someone in Nutwood is a thief?

(Shouting)

Yes, yes of course. No need to worry.

Everyone, please, calm down!

Come on, Bill.

I think Constable Growler needs our help.

BILLWhat are you looking for?

My magnifying glass. We'll need it to look for finger prints.

Now where did I put it?

Of course!

(Clucking like a chicken)

Bill, what are you-- huh?

(Clucking)

Stop horsing around! We've got a lot to--

Oh, no! He isn't joking!

(Clucking)

Bill?

(Fingers snapping)

Bill?

He won't snap out of it!

Bill! Come back! Stop!

Bill! Stop! Bill...!

Bill! Wait!

(Clucking)

Bill!

(Chickens squawking)

Here, chick-chick. Here, chickie-chickie-chickie.

Got you!

Who's making a hullabaloo in my henhouse?

Ahh! Ahh! Slow down, Bill!

Rupert? I thought it was those trouble making Fox brothers!

Sorry, Gaffer Jarge! I'll explain later!

My hens won't be laying for weeks, you young scallywags!

(Clucking)

Fascinating!

Poor Bill's been in a bit of a flap, so to speak!

(Chuckling)

(Crowing like a rooster)

(Crashing noises)

(Clucking)

Oh, dear! We'd better get Bill back to normal

before he hurts himself!

Here, chick-- I mean, Bill.

This should do the trick. Or, undo it, as the case may be.

On my command, you will awake and return to being Bill.

Wake up!

Huh? Who-- Professor?

Well, what am I doing here?

Well done, Professor!

Perhaps you should keep this, Rupert. Just in case.

In case of what?

Did I miss something?

Sunset already?

Gosh! The day seems to have flown by!

(Laughing)

What's so funny?

It's a long story, Bill.

That's what you always say.

(Birds chirping)

Now, really, this is too much!

My silver cuff links have been stolen!

Good morning, Constable Growler.

Have you had any luck with the investigation?

It hasn't even begun, Rupert!

I've only just now finished filling out

all the missing property reports!

But now that I'm out from behind that desk,

I can finally get to the bottom of this crime wave.

Not yet, I'm afraid. We've come to report another--

(Shouting)

Great Scott!

One at a time! One at a time!

Slowly please! There's no need to shout!

Constable Growler's going to be swamped with more paper work!

Rupert, what's all the commotion about now?

The Nutwood thief has struck again!

Really? There wasn't anything missing at our house.

I'm sure of it.

Seems you're the only ones! And Constable Growler hasn't

even had time to investigate yesterday's robberies.

Time for his assistants to swing into action!


My thoughts exactly!

And other than your mum's gold earrings,

and the bracelet taken the night before,

nothing else is missing?

Nope! Not a--

He got the cupcakes!

I was saving the last for a snack!

Somebody has to stop this fiend!

We'd better search for finger prints.

Ahem.

I can help solve that part of the mystery, boys.

Dad! How could you?

We've interviewed everyone, and haven't found a single clue.

Not even one fingerprint! I don't get it.

There's one more thing we can try.

If the burglar comes back again tonight, we'll be ready!

Aww! When you said we were going on a "stake out",

I thought you meant we were going to have a barbeque!

Just hide, Podgy. This is brilliant!

(Crickets chirring)

This is boring!

Must... go... home.

Podgy, get down!

We're supposed to be-- Podgy?

Did you see that, Rupert? Podgy must be sleepwalking or-- huh?

Rupert?

Rupert!

What's going on? Hey!

Are you joking around?

You're not joking around! Oh my gosh!

Hope this works.

Come on, Rupert. Wake up!

Huh? Bill? What's going on?

What am I doing with Grandma Bear's old mirror?

You were in a trance!

I think this hypnosis stuff is catching! Podgy's got it too!

Hmm. Bill, you'd better keep an eye on Podgy.

I'll get Constable Growler.

Really, Rupert, this all sounds highly fanciful!

That's why I thought you should see for yourself,

Constable Growler!

Shh! He's still inside.

Here he comes!

Halt! In the name of the law!

He doesn't even know we're here.

I can wake him up with this.

Hang on, Rupert.

First I'd like to see where he's taking those pearls.

This is certainly one for the books!

Podgy, the sleep-walking Nutwood bandit.

Not just Podgy. Look!

BILLThe Great Mephisto!

Ah, yes, Podgy Pig, isn't it?

For me? Why thank you!

Come again tomorrow, won't you?

Another gift? Well, I'm flattered! Thank you.

Yes, Great Mephisto.

These Nutwood folk are so generous.

(Evil laughter)

Should we round them up and un-hypnotize them?

We'll do that later, Rupert.

It's safer to let them find their way home.

Can't have a bunch of civilians milling about

while I make an arrest.

That's the last one.

You lads stay put. It's time I apprehended this charlatan.

Get ready, Rupert. That Mephisto fellow might make a run for it.

Don't worry, Bill. Constable Growler has him cornered.

He's taking his time.

There he is! Cons--

Wait! Look at his face!

(Gasping)

Listen carefully, you will instruct the townsfolk

to deliver all their valuables into your safe keeping.

Valuables...safe keeping.

And tomorrow night you will bring the loot to me!

Yes, Great Mephisto.

This will be the ultimate finale!

(Evil laughter)

The coast is clear! Let's go!

With the local constable under my control,

I'll empty the entire village in one night!

Hmm. Two of my assistants

have failed to make their nightly contribution.

But my powers never fail.

Over there!

Constable Growler!

Ahh!

What have we here? A couple of free thinkers?

This will never do!

Look into my eyes...

(Gasping)

Run!

Ahh!

(Evil laughter)

Ahh! Let me go!

Look into my eyes...

Come on, Constable. You've got to wake up!

And I arrest you in the name of-- Rupert? What? How?

No time for explanations! We have to find--


(Dog-like barking)

Bill? Oh, no!

You take care of Bill, Rupert.

I'll handle that Mephisto character!

Bill! Here, Bill!

He won't get away this time-- whoa!

(Evil laughter)

Don't be so sure, Constable chicken!

(Clucking and crowing)

And now for that meddlesome little bear.

(Evil laughter)

(Dog-like howling)

Bill! Here, Bill! Heel!

Ahh!

And where are you off to in such a hurry?

I believe you and I have a little unfinished business.

(Gasping)

No... you... won't...

(Growling and barking)

Look into my-- what?

(Growling)

Ow!

Let go, you mangy mutt!

Well done, Bill!

(Grunting)

Oh, why don't you go chase a squirrel or something!

Fetch!

(Barking)

Now then, what would be a fitting end for a curious bear?

I know!

You do remember the old saying about cats and curiosity?

You don't scare me, Mephisto!

You cannot resist! No one can resist the Great Mephisto!

Look into my eyes, my little kitty cat!

What? Huh?

Meow!

It worked!

Not even the Great Mephisto can resist the Great Mephisto!

(Barking and meowing)

That's enough, Bill. Here, boy!

Yeow! Easy fellow! Come on, time to wake up!

Yuk! Rupert? What's--

(Cat-like meowing)

(Crowing and clucking)

Constable Growler!

(Crowing)

(Chickens clucking)

If that's the pesky Fox brothers

up to their hen house shenanigans I'll--

What in thunderation?

(Crowing)

Meow.

I hate to ask, but, did I miss something?

I'll fill you in later, Bill. It's a long story!

I knew you were going to say that!

Come on, Rupert. Tell me what happened.

What do I have to do? Sit up and beg?

(Laughing)

Now what's so funny?

T'ain't a thing funny about it!

My chickens won't be laying for weeks!

Only one more to go.

Wake up, Not-So-Great Mephisto.

Huh? What? Let me out of here!

Oww! My back!

(Laughing)

(Crowing)

Oh, no! It's been reversed! Constable Growler!

(Crowing)

h*, h*, h*! I'm fine, Rupert.

But I think solving this case has given us all

something to "crow" about, don't you?

(Laughing and crowing)

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