03x01 - Sam-merica/Put the Cat Out: Door Spin/BBQ Bandit

[bunniefuu]

[opening theme music playing]

I'm Conquistador Sam,

and I'mma sailin'
the high seas,
lookin' for untouched land.

Bingo!

I hereby claim this land
as Sam-Merica.

Okay, let's see, now.

I think I'll start
by putting a four lane highway
right through here.

No, ten lane.

Then I'll put some fast food
places right over there.

And maybe a mini-mall
down that way
a mega-mall over yonder,

and them, some regular
sized malls in between.

I'll cover
every square inch of this land

with good old
fashion concrete.

Ehh. You've got
some interesting ideas, Doc.

But I'm happy with my island
the way it is.

Your island?

I discovered this land.
You're trespassing
on Sam-Merica.

But I've lived here
for 20 years.

Them you own me


This here flag,
changes everything.

So that little flag means
you own the entire island now?

Heck yeah, does.

Does that include
this piece of driftwood?

Yep, that's mine.

Does it also includes
that little sea shell?

Also mine.

And this coconut tree?

Mine too.

What about this seaweed?

Also mine.

Well, how about
this swamp rock?

Mine again.

And this one?

That's mine too.

Okay, okay.
What about that one over there?

Mine, mine, mine.

[growling]

Oh!

[Sam screaming] Oh!
Down! Down, gator!

Well, whaddya know?
That rock was a giant alligator
the whole time!

Maybe I need to get
my eyes checked. [laughs]

[struggling walla]

Down! Down, gator!

[Sam screaming]

[panting]

Ah! Beautiful view, ain't it?

Here, why don't you
have a closer look.

[screams]

Consider yourself deported.

Hey, Doc. What do you think
of my new ship?

What? That's my ship.

Not according to this flag.

Be prepared to be boarded.

Now. Get out and stay out.

And take your stupid flag
back too.

Looks like the island
is officially mine now.

[Bugs] Thanks, Doc.

[screaming] Ooh!

I'll blast
that critter's hide off.

Yoo-hoo, up here.

Grrr!

Hey!

Nice wall Doc,
but what's it for?

It's for keeping ugly,
smelly varmints like you, out!

But what if you need something
from the outside world?

I won't. I've got everything
I needed in here.

Yes, sir.

Everything that I need
is behind this wall.

Everything except your wallet.

My wallet?

You heard me, Doc.
Unless this belongs to another
Conquistador Sam.

Give me that back right now.

I can't on account
of this big sturdy wall.

Ooh! Them I'mma comin' over.

[siren wails]

Identification, please.

Ah, well,
I don't have it on me.

So, jumping the wall
with no ID, huh?

But this is my country.

Tell it to the judge, pal.

Order, order.
Order in the court.

So crossing the border
with no ID, huh?

This is a grave offense.

-But I--
-No but.
You'll get the chair for this.

No. Not the chair.

The chair!

Can't we talk this over?

Absolutely not.

It's the chair all the way.

No. Anything but the chair.

Tell it to the chair.

Now, sit down!

And make yourself comfortable.

Hey.

Well, what do you think?

This ain't half bad.

Yeah, a fella can get used
to this kind of treatment.

And you haven't even
reclined yet.

Don't mind if I do.

[Sam screaming]

[water splashing]

Well, that's that.

Hey, what gives?

This time you're out of here
for good, rabbit.

Adios, amigo.

[Bugs Bunny screaming]

Ouch!

Enjoy your new island rabbit.

Well, I guess this is it.

I better get used to eat clams.

Hey, a pearl.

Looks like something else
is down here too.

Wow! A treasure chest.

What's this?

Another treasure chest?

[stuttering]
Two treasure chests?

And another? This situation
couldn't get any better.

Whoo! Hi, Mr. Bunny,
wanna party with us?

Well, I don't see why not.

Party Cruise?

It don't get
much better than this.

A new sports car?

[Bugs Bunny cheering]

What?

Talk about lucky.

Oh no, you don't.
This is Sam-Merica
territory now.

We're switching places.

I'm staying here forever.

Goodbye key.

Now, scram, rabbit.
Let's kick this party
up a notch.

[whooping triumphantly]

Enjoy your new island, Doc.

I'll you stinky rabbit?

This island is the greatest.

I discovered it, and I--

What the--

[Sam screaming]

[fireworks exploding]

What Christopher Columbust.

[closing theme music playing]

[yawning]

Well, it's time
to put the cat out.

[grunts] Come on, Sylvester.

You know the drill.

[stuttering]
Cat's out at six forty fi...

A quarter to seven.

[thuds]

[muffled]

[theme music playing]

[sizzling]

[exclaims]

[whooping triumphantly]

[knife slashing]

Oh!

[screaming]

[sinister instrumental
music playing]

[laughs maliciously]

[mimicking duck call]

Oh!

[theme music playing]