04x06 - Bugs Bunny in Hideout Hare/Daffy Magician: An Ordinary Mop

[bunniefuu]

[theme music playing]

[siren blaring]

-Faster, Mugsy. -Duh, okay, boss.

-[engine revving] -[siren blaring]

-[g*nshots] -[glass shattering]

[tire popping]

[stuttering]

[tires screeching]

We're goin' on foot.

-[door opens] -[coins jingling]

We gotta find a place to hide, Mugsy.

Quick! Down that rabbit hole.

[thuds] Okay, Mugsy. Throw down the cash.

-[coins jingling] -And the rest.

[loud thud]

You okay, boss?

We'll hide down here until the coast is clear.

Now help me stash these bags.

Eh, what's up, Docs?

Forgive me, I wasn't expecting company.

Listen up, rabbit.

We're crashin' down here until we're done crashin' down here. Capeesh?

Oh, well, sure. Make yourselves at home.

But um, my washing machine is broken,

so you'll have to take your dirty laundry someplace else.

-Duh, this ain't laundry. -[coins jingling]

-It's stolen cash. -Shaddap!

[coins jingling]

Now the rabbit knows too much.

Mugsy? Go in the other room and take him out.

Duh, okay, boss.

[paper rustling]

-[door closes] -[laughing maniacally]

-So, where are ya gonna take me out, Mugsy? -Huh?

The Stork Club? Copacabana?

Copaca-what-now?

The boss told ya to take me out, remember?

Oh, yeah, but...

You wouldn't wanna disappoint the boss now, would ya?

Gee, no.

Well then, what are ya waitin' for?

C'mon! Take me out!

[film rolling]

[slurping]

[hooves clopping]

[Mugsy laughing] That was fun!

Mugsy? Where were yas?

Duh, I took the rabbit out, boss. Just like you said.

And I had the most wonderful time.

-That's it! -[groans]

-Looks like I'll have to take care of the rabbit myself. -[knife clicks open]

[man 1] Well, they can't hide down there forever! [laughs]

The cops!

They know we're down here. They got us cornered.

Calm down, boys. Calm down.

I can help you sneak past those cops.

What do you mean, rabbit?

If you're disguised as rabbits, the cops won't even notice ya.

If you think I'm dressin' up like a rabbit--

[man 1] As soon as they come out, blast 'em.

You're absolutely right.

Lookin' good, fellas. Lookin' good.

Now let's see ya hop around.

Just get down on all fours and hop up and down like this.

Now, you try.

Hmm. Not quite high enough. Hang on a second, fellas.

[thuds]

Now, that's more like it.

Duh, wait a second.

These guys ain't police. They look like...

Hunters.

[g*nshots]

-[thuds] -[g*nshots]

Well, what do ya know. It's rabbit season. [laughs]

Now you're gonna get it, rabbit.

Uh-oh.

Clear out, boys. Make way. Official business.

Rocky and Mugsy! This is the police!

We know you're down there!

Duh, it's the real police, Rocky.

How we going to get out of this mess?

Ya might have a fightin' chance if ya had a hostage.

That's it. I'm takin' ya as hostage.

Rocky? Surrender, or we're comin' down there.

Not so fast, copper.

I got me a hostage.

And I'm bumpin' him off if ya try any funny business.

Oh, for heaven's sake.

Very well, Rocky. What are your demands?

I want the keys to a getaway car.

[Cop] All right. All right.

-[keys jingling] -Huh!

Okay, there, Rocky. You got your car. Now send up the hostage.

C'mon, Mugsy. Grab the rabbit and let's go.

What? C'mon, Doc. Live a little.

Why settle for a getaway car

when you can fly off in a getaway helicopter?

Say, that's not a bad idea.

Hey, copper! I want a helicopter.

All right. All right.

[helicopter hovering]

-[keys jingling] -Huh!

Hungry? How about a sandwich?

Yeah. We want a sandwich.

And your outfits are lookin' a little shabby. How about some designer suits?

Send down some designer suits.

Ooh. And how 'bout a bowling ball?

And a bowling ball.

Wait. Why do I want-- [groans]

-And another bowling ball. -Uh-oh.

Several gallons of hot tar.

Chicken feathers.

Eight more bowling ba*ls.

Liquid nitrogen.

Two anvils. Super glue.

Two barrels of gunpowder.

Oh, and 300 sticks of dynamite.

Well, it's been fun, fellas.

-[coins jingling] -Here you are, officer.

The boys should be out any second now.

[both screaming]

-[both crying] -Take us away already! Get us outta here!

-Oh, quit your crying, ya babies. -[siren blaring]

It just goes to show ya.

Ya never know where you might end up

when ya go down a rabbit hole.

[laughing]

[audience clapping]

I, the great Daffini,

will perform amazing feats of prestidigitation.

For this trick, I shall need a volunteer.

Huh? Who, what, when, where, how?

Thank you for volunteering, my good sir!

Now, will you please examine this mop.

Does it seem like a normal mop to you?

Yeah, seems like an ordinary mop to me.

You hear that folks? An ordinary mop.

Now, what does this look like to you?

Uh... A bucket full of soapy water?

No strings? No hidden compartments?

-Not that I can see... -Right you are.

Now, if you would please just place that ordinary mop

into that ordinary bucket of soapy water.

-Like this? -Fine, fine, just like that.

Now, could you please take that ordinary mop

and just push it around on the stage for me?

-Like this? -Excellent! Just like that.

As you can see, audience, this ordinary pig

is pushing an ordinary mop across the stage.

Eh, should I keep going?

Yes, yes, back and forth. Back and forth.

Good. Keep going.

Now that we have established

that there's nothing out of the ordinary taking place here on this stage,

you are about to see one of the most amazing feats of magic

about to unfold before your very eyes.

[Porky sighing in exhaustion]

There you have it, folks.

[audience clapping]

Excuse me, but what was so magical about that?

Why, don't you see?

You made all the dirt disappear.

[Daffy exclaiming]

[audience booing]

[theme music playing]