04x08 - Grand Canyon Canary/Hole in Dumb

[bunniefuu]

[theme music playing]

[Tweety] Wow, the Grand Canyon.

It's so big, Granny.

It sure is, Tweety.

Carved by the Colorado River over millions of years,

it really is one of the world's greatest natural wonders.

Grand Canyon, Shmand Canyon.

I've got my own Grand Canyon to worry about.

[stomach grumbles]

I'm gonna starve in this hot, barren waste hole.

Huh?

[sizzling]

Maybe this barren waste hole isn't so barren after all.

♪ Oh, give me a home where there's no Styrofoam ♪

♪ Where there's no trash Or urban decay ♪

♪ Where there's no laundromats and there's no puddy tats ♪

♪ And the skies are not smoggy all day ♪

Oh, look, a fishing hook.

But there's no bait on it.

It won't catch anything that way.

Let's see now.

[grunts] There. A carrot.

Happy fishing, Mr. Fishing Hook.

What the?

Huh?

[braying]

[donkey snorting]

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

I said, whoa!

[screaming]

Look, Granny.

"Beware of mountain goats."

Are mountain goats very dangerous, Granny?

Oh, yes, Tweety.

Mountain goats can be very territorial.

[scoffs] What's so scary about a little old billy goat?

[goat snorts]

[pinball machine sounds]

Mountain goats are dangerous.

Fortunately, they're not as dangerous

as, say, mountain lions.

[Tweety] Mountain lions?

[mountain lion growls]

[struggling noises]

[mumbling]

Mountain lions certainly are vicious,

but at least they're not venomous, like rattle snakes.

[Tweety] Rattle snakes?

[rattle snake rattling, hissing]

Huh?

Ow! [grunts, screaming]

-[biting noises] -[screams]

Ooh, lookie there, Granny.

My. Speak of the devil.

Oh, well, it's all part of the circle of life, Tweety.

[hisses]

Why, hello there, Mr. Donkey.

Say, are you hungry?

I know just what you need.

Some delicious hay!

[gulps, moaning]

Oh, Granny. I think our donkey is rested now.

Oh, good. I think it's time to load up the saddle.

Don't forget my little, itty-bitty toothbrush.

[things clattering]

Oh, dear.

Oh, I think our donkey is still tired, Granny.

Oh, I think you're right.

It's a good thing I keep a spare donkey just in case.

Gee, Granny. You sure are prepared for anything.

[Granny] At my age, you have to be, dear.

Let's get back on the trail.

All right, Tweety, I think I'll have

a look in the souvenir shop.

You be a good little bird and watch our mule.

Okay, Granny.

[tweeting]

-[squish] -Aha!

I've been hoofing it all through this blasted canyon,

but it was worth it.

Silly puddy tat. You don't have hooves.

Ha-ha. Smart observation, my tasty friend.

But Mr. Donkey does.

[brays]

[Granny] I'm back, Tweety.

Sadly, I didn't find anything worth taking home as a souvenir.

What's this?

Ooh, how interesting.

A collection of native shrubbery.

Oh, my. This will make a great souvenir.

Granny, you know what they say

about visiting national parks.

"Take nothing but photographs.

Leave nothing but footprints."

Oh, dear. You're absolutely right, Tweety.

This doesn't belong to us, it belongs to Mother Nature.

["America the Beautiful" playing]

[distant screaming]

And Mother Nature is one mother you

don't want to mess with.

[theme music playing]

[theme music playing]

[commentator] Welcome back to the 93rd Putters United,

or for you sophisticates, the PU Tournament.

Next up on the first tee,

leading contender, Elmer Fudd.

[caddy wheezing]

Hurry up, caddy, get the lead out.

I don't have all day.

I'm sorry, Mr. Fudd. [grunts]

I wasn't expecting to carry your clubs

all the way from your home.

I'll get it. Are you sure this is the driver?

[gasps] Oh, my goodness.

Oh, my goodness.

Anyone, is there a caddy in the house?

Is there a caddy in the house?

[Daffy] Pardon me, sorry, excuse me.

Caddy coming through. Move aside!

Caddy Daffy at your service, sir.

Oh, I'm so glad you're here.

Without a caddy, I won't have a chance in this tournament.

Wait a minute.

I've never seen you caddy before.

-Do you have credentials? -I certainly do.

Look at all these great, neat major awards.

Fine. Tee up my ball, you crazy duck.

I won't let you down.

Oh, I got it.

-Ooh! -On with it!

Ha!

Well, what do you know? A cute little gopher was in the way.

[chuckles] Did I say little?

[Elmer groans]

[gagging]

[commentator] A hole-in-one for Elmer Fudd.

Well, that's one way to "gopher" it.

[people mumbling, shushing]

[commentator] As Mr. Fudd readies his next shot,

his focus is absolute.

[sound of soda can opening]

Nothing like popping a frosty sodie pop, am I right?

[shushes] Be very, very quiet!

I'm very, very sorry.

[Daffy spitting]

Eww! Diet?

-Silence! -Sorry.

[glugging noises]

Are you finished?

[belches]

Just throw it away!

[grunts]

So, this is what you meant very, very quiet.

Oh, great.

My ball's caught in the sand.

Ah, it's not all bad.

This isn't the beach! It's a sand trap!

-[screams] -More of a water hazard, I'd say.

Unbelievable. Give me a sand wedge.

-What's this? -It's a sandwich.

No, not a sandwich,

a sand wedge, the club!

-So, you want a club, huh? -Yes.

What are you doing?

You said you wanted a club.

I don't want a club sandwich.

Oh, you want a different one?

-Yeah. -You want a sub?

Just give me a wood!

An iron!

A driver...

I need a hero.

[commentator] Our current leader, Elmer Fudd, enjoys a one stroke advantage

and we've reached the 18th and final hole of our tournament.

It all comes down to this.

-Okay for this next... -Listen, duck.

If I don't make this shot, I could lose the tournament.

And if I lose the tournament...

Easy, there, buddy.

I got this whole thing down.

Now, close your eyes...

and swing!

[commentator] That shot's looking good.

-[tire screeching noise] -Oh, no. It's hooking way left toward the trees.

[gasps]

[commentator] Oh, wait, it's bouncing out.

Oh! I don't believe what I'm seeing!

And it's in! And the crowd is going wild!

Whoa, Nelly!

Truly the most amazing player that ever stepped on the green.

A true champion.

The trophy is presented to...

-Daffy Duck! -[whooping]

Finally, a receptacle for my French dip.

This calls for a club.

[munching]

Mm.

[theme music playing]

[theme music playing]