04x05 - Members Only

[bunniefuu]

Sugar,

spice...

and everything nice.

These were
the ingredients chosen

to create
the perfect little girl.

But Professor Utonium
accidentally added

an extra ingredient
to the concoction--

Chemical X.

[expl*si*n]

Thus the Powerpuff Girls
were born!

Using their ultra-superpowers,

Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup
have dedicated their lives

to fighting crime
and the forces of evil!

NARRATOR:
The city of Townsville,

a very normal city
like most cities.

And, like most cities,

Townsville even has
its own resident superheroes.

Why, there they go right now.

Let's follow them, shall we?

Professor! Professor!

It's time! It's time!

What? It's time?

Batten down
the canned goods.

Everyone
to the shelters!

Not that time,
Professor.

It's time for the most
important newscast of the year.

TV ANNOUNCER:
Welcome to CTN's live coverage of...

The Association...

of World...

Super...

men...

Super Summit...



It's so exciting!

The world's greatest
superheroes

all gettin' together for
a superspecial meeting.

Wow!

[talking all at once]

Oh h*, right.

Time for your annual
superhero

hero worship
silliness.

Major Glory is the most American
American of all times.

Mucho Muchacho
es muy guapo.

And Mandingo's
the b*mb.

Think they'll invite
Krunk this year?

Nah, he's
too stupid.

Hush, hush!

I'm Shaquille Silverstein,

and I'll be bringing you
all the latest on the AWSM event

live from CTN headquarters.

We now take you live
to Newscopter 5

and our correspondent
Maria Guadalupe O'Flanagan.

Maria?

Thanks, Shaquille.

I'm here live, high above
Mount Neverest,

the world's
tallest summit,

for the world
superest summit,

where the world's
most elite heroes

discuss the most secret
of super issues.

As you can see, many heroes
are arriving as we speak.

Heroes confirmed
in attendance

include such
international favorites as...

a monument to
the timeless strength

of the British empire...

Big Ben.

Japan's perfect upgrade

of man and electrocellular
micronet enhancements...

E-Male.

The Caribbean crusader,
the Atlantean lion...

Ya-mon.

The most machismo
for your peso...

Mexico's Mucho Muchacho.

The sentinel
of the savanna...

Africa's monarch of might...

Mandingo.

Channeling
the collective manpower

of the world's
largest nation...

Mu Shu Guy Man!

Throwing all the shrimps
on the barbie...

Australia's
Down Under Mate.

Now we take you to
our man live on the scene,

Fredrico Chang.

Thanks, Shaquille.

I'm here live at the very top
of Mount Neverest

in the courtyard
of the Rotunda of Seclusion,

the most well-known secret lair
in all of superdom.

There's
a buzz of excitement

as long-standing members
and newcomers alike meet and greet

while they await
the arrival of--

Wait a minute.

Could it be? It is!

The AWSM's founder
and chairman,

America's favorite son,

the captain
of capitalism...

Major Glory!

Hi, kids!

Buy
my action figure.

Major Glory,

Major Glory,

could we have
a few words?

Thank you
for your adoration,

but alas, it's time
to call to order

The Association
of World Super Men

Super Summit...



I'm so glad you all have
the privilege of recording

this monumentous
occasion for posterity.

Now scram!

Well, there you have it,
live from Mount Neverest...

And live
for Newscopter 5...

And live from
CTN headquarters,

that was the AWSM
Super Summit 2000 live.

That was live!

Live all the way!
Live!

Oh, my gosh.
It's always so exciting!

Oh, I know.

Did you see the flying in,
and everyone was--

Yeah, and the stuff
was all zapping around his--

And the fancy cape
was all blowing.

And did you see
who else was there?

Oh my gosh, yes.
And, oh, you know who else--

Yeah!

Wow.

Phew.

Aah.

Yeah.

What do you think
they do in there?

You know,
super stuff.

They discuss moral issues
and world crisises

and compare
crime-fighting techniques.

Yeah, like body slams
and windmill kicks.

Imagine what
we could learn from them.

The masters.

I wish someday we could be
good enough superheroes

to be invited
to a super summit.

Here now.

What's this
silliness

about being
good enough superheroes?

You're the best
superheroes I know.

Oh, Professor,

you're just saying that
'cause you're our dad.

Well, yes,

but that's not
the only reason.

I mean, goodness,

I don't know
how many times I've heard

"Once again,
the day is saved

thanks to the
Powerpuff Girls."

Yeah, but that's
just Townsville.

These guys save
the whole world.

Hmm.

I seem to remember
three little girls

who saved
the whole world

from being turned
into dogs

and saved the whole world
from outer space invaders.

Why, you've even matched wits
with the most vile, most evil...

well, you know.
Him.

So I say you're certainly
good enough superheroes

to go to any old summit
you want.

You really
think we could?

Of course.

GIRLS:
Can we go, Professor? Huh?

Can we, please?
Can we, can we?

Of course,
and if you hurry,

you'll be there
before they finish roll call.

[coughing]

Little angels.

NARRATOR:
And with that,
our girls race across the globe

to join the ranks of
the world's greatest heroes.

Well, that does it
for roll call.

I motion
we proceed with--

- Hi! - Hi!
- Hi!

[gasp]
What?

All right, who let
children in here?

What is this?

We're Blossom...

Bubbles...
And Buttercup.

The Powerpuff Girls.

We're superheroes, too.

And your biggest fans.

And we want to join
the association.

[snickering]

Oh, my stars.

Isn't that just
the cutest thing?

The widdle
super babies

want to join
the association.

Well, little ladies,

all superheroes
want to join our association,

but we only accept
the cream of the crop--

heroes with very specific
superattributes, hmm?

And I'm afraid our entrance exam
is extremely...

rigorous.

Powerpuffs are ready
for anything.

Let's do it!
Let's do it!

Challenge!

h* h* h*!

Aren't we
full of spice?

Gentlemen,

shall we let
the Sugarpuffs give it a go?

[talking all at once]

Methinks that would be
most humorous.

[laughter]

Well, ladies,

my associates seem willing
to indulge your requests,

so what the hey?

Ha ha!

On with the tests!

So...

who's ready
for a test of strength?

Uh, yeah.
Right here, Major.

Ah, Butterdish.
Excellent.

Buttercup.

All you have to
do is out lift...

let's see...

Big Ben!

Righty-o,
Guvnor.

Pip pip, top top,
and a cheerio, what?

Well, hello,
hello, hello.

Art thou ready,
milady?

Let's do dis
like Buddhists.

Ready...

lift!

By Jove!

Mmm.

Harrumph.

[grunting]

[grunting]

[gasp]

Higgledy-piggledy.

Chim-chiminee...

chim-chim-cheroo!

Huzzah!

[Buttercup grunting]

By the rockets'
red glare!

Yahoo! Yay, Buttercup!

Woo-hoo!

Poppycock.

Yahoo! Yay, Buttercup!

Woo-hoo!

Ha ha!
She deuced you, limey!

Hee hee. She be cleaning
your clock there.

The bell doth toll, dude.
Ha ha ha ha ha!

All right,
all right, all right.

Test number two--
test of speed.

Kaboodles
versus...

E-male!

BUBBLES:
Wow!

One lap around
the world.

On your marks...

So, my little JPEG,

shall we download?

Ready...

[fires shot]

Wow!

- Go, go, go!
- Go, Bubbles! Go!

Oh.

Um, excuse me?

Am I just supposed
to keep up with you,

or is someone
supposed to win?

Oh, one of us
should definitely win.

Ok.

Now then,

it takes E-Male precisely 7 seconds
to circle the globe,

so he should be here
in 5, 4, 3...

Yee-ha!

Bubbles, yeah!
Way to go!

Ha ha! Need more RAM
in the hard drive, eh?

Reboot,
hear me now.

Your PPP connection
has been severed.

Ok.

Test number 3
won't be so easy.

This test not only
demands superpowers

but wit as well.

Heroic problem
solving and...

staying cool
under fire.

Now, let's see...

we need a crime
or a crisis of some sort.

Aha!

An asteroid shower
hurtling towards Earth

that will surely shatter
our very planet.

Yes...

that should
do nicely.

Blaze 'em,
let's do it!

Uh, if I may say,
sir,

it's a great honor
and privilege

to actually team up
with the Major Glory

to save the world.

Well, thank you,
Bless 'em,

but I'm here in more
of an advisory role.

I'll be grading your performance
and, you know,

save the earth if
you can't hack it.

Ha ha ha!

Ooh, watch it, dear.

Here they come.

Uh-oh.

Aw, you missed
a few, sweetheart.

Oh, oh, oh.

Let's not forget
the big one, shall we?

Oh!

Think, Blossom, think.

The clock is ticking.

Gotta cut this
just right.

[gasp]

Well, I'll be born
on the Fourth of July.

Watch out!
There's still one left!

I pledge allegiance
to the flag

of the Unconscious
States of America.

Now we know why Ben Franklin
wanted a turkey.

That shiner's a dandy,
Yankee Doodle.

♪ Blossom, Blossom,
Blossom ♪

♪ Blossom,
Blossom, Blossom ♪

Yeah, baby,
yeah!

MAJOR GLORY:
Sugarpuffs!

Ten-hut!

Prepare to be graded.

Your score in
the test of strength,

incomparable;

test of speed, unbeatable;

and test of heroism
in the field, unparalleled.

- Yahoo! - We did it!
- Whee!

- We did it!
- Yay! - Hooray!

The Powderpuffs
have indeed

passed the entrance
requirements.

What do you
say to that, men?

Surest thou jest.

Val Halen,
Viking god of rock!

Lend us your voice.

Very well.

'Tis nay, I sayest.

Nay!

Ne'er shall
these weak pixies

defile the sacred
house of men

with their
girlish whimsies.

Besides, we don't need
no little rug rats crampin' our style.

ALL:
Yeah!

Well, there
you have it.

Membership denied.

What?
But we passed all the tests!

I thought our powers
were good enough.

Aww...

baby bow-bow's
no-no goo-goo noove?

Look, kids,
you're missing the point.

This is The Association
of World Super Men.

You're little girls.

We are the men...

the protectors,
the hunters,

the fighters
and the showoffs,

and the noisemakers!

You are little girls.

You should be at home
with your mommy,

learning how to
cook and clean,

and blah blah
blah blah blah,

whatever women stuff.

So leave the superheroics
to the super men!

- Why?
- Argh!

[breathing hard]

Look,

there are certain roles
for men

and certain roles
for women, right?

Now let's take your family,
for example.

Who goes to work
and brings home the paycheck?

Our dad.

Right! Who pays the rent
and puts the bread on the table?

Our dad.

Bingo.

- And who cooks the meals?
- Our dad.

- Who does the laundry?
- Dad.

- Who washes the dishes?
- Dad.

- Who scrubs the loo?
- Dad.

- Who makes the cakes?
- Dad.

Then who mows the lawn
and washes the car?

- Bubbles.
- Bubbles.

So what does
your mother do?

GIRLS:
We don't have a mother.

Now, if you'll excuse us,

we have many pressing
manly matters to attend to.

- But--
- Go home!

Fine.

Didn't want to be in
your stinky old club anyway.

You got your underpants
on on the outside.

NARRATOR:
Oh, no.

The girls' dreams
have been shattered.

Their idols knocked them
from their pedestals.

What a bummer.

But what's this?

Some sort of
spacefaring muscle rod,

headed straight for
the Rotunda of Seclusion!

Men of earth,

witness the coming of...

Mascumax!

Breaker of men,

taker of worlds.

Be there any true men
amongst thee,

step forth

and bring thy manhood
against mine own...

so that we might see
who has the upper hand

upon the measuring stick.

Finally, a true test
of our manhood.

Heroes h*!

Girls, thank goodness
you're home.

BLOSSOM:
It was terrible.

They all
laughed at us.

There, there.
I know all about it.

I saw the whole thing
live.

Those jerks
were just plain awful.

I'd be giving them
a piece of my mind right now

if they weren't already
being savagely beaten

by some thug
from outer space!

SILVERSTEIN:
This is the scene around the globe--

members of the AWSM
being hunted down

and beaten like sick dogs.

BUTTERCUP:
Serves 'em right.

PROFESSOR:
Now, Buttercup,

I know they weren't
very heroic

when they picked
on you,

but real
superheroes

don't let
what others say

keep them from being
really super.

And real heroes don't let
bullies from outer space

beat up folks
and break stuff.

Come on, girls.

The AWSM needs some
real heroes right now.

Angels.

Fools!

I feed off your expulsions
of manliness.

The more manhood
you bring against me,

the harder I become!

BLOSSOM:
Hey, boy!

Why don't you try
some Powerpuff?

What?

Little girls?

Ha ha ha ha!

Shouldn't you be home learning
how to be mommies?

Argh.

This stuff
again?

Look, this planet
is our home,

and mommies are ready
to clean house.

All right, ladies,

let's do
some real cookin'.

Form furious
flaming feline!

Aah!

No, it cannot be!

BLOSSOM:
If you can't take the heat, then...

stay out of the kitchen.

[sobbing]

Mommy!

There were some girls,

and they were being mean to me.

Oh, thank you, Powerpuff Girls!

Thank you!

You boys
all right?

Um, yeah, but...

uh, well, uh...

Me and the guys all wanted
to ask you something.

If you want us to join
your club now, forget it.

Um, actually...

no.

We were all
wondering if, um...

we could be
in your club.

You are our heroes.

Oh, please!

After everything
you've put us through,

you think--

Now, girls,

just because they were
mean and insensitive

doesn't mean we shouldn't turn
the other cheek.

NARRATOR:
And so, once again,
the day is saved,

thanks to the Powerpuff Girls

and the newly-formed

Society of
Associated Puffketeers.

Aren't they cute little muffins?

♪ Blossom,
commander and the leader ♪

♪ Bubbles,
she is the joy and the laughter ♪

♪ Buttercup,
she's the toughest fighter ♪

♪ Powerpuffs save the day ♪

♪ Fighting crime ♪

♪ trying to save the world ♪

♪ Here they come,
just in time ♪

♪ the Powerpuff Girls ♪

♪ Fighting crime ♪

♪ trying to save the world ♪

♪ Here they come,
just in time ♪

♪ the Powerpuff Girls ♪

Powerpuff!