01x08 - Don't Go Looking For Death. Death Will Come Find You

[bunniefuu]

EPISODE 8

DON'T GO LOOKING FOR DEATH.
DEATH WILL COME FIND YOU.

Mom?

This is too cruel.

No.

No. Please don't.

No!

I had always thought
that I knew a lot about my mother.

But it turns out
that I didn't know anything.

Mom used to be a girl with big dreams.

That girl full of dreams

became a woman,

a wife,

and then a mother.

She even had a child
with the man she loved.

Her happiness,
which she thought would last forever...

was but fleeting.

CHOI JUN-MO

I didn't know then

that the reason my mom didn't break down

was because of me.

Hello?

I'm sorry?

Hang in there, Yee-jae.

Stay with me, Yee-jae.

Yee-jae.

I'm so sorry.

I wish I could be sick in your place.

Mom's heart was torn to pieces

because she couldn't
be sick in my place.

Sir.

How could you just fire me overnight?

The company's going through tough times.

- Sir.
- Let go of me.

RESIGN

UNJUST FIRING IS m*rder

WORKERS HAVE RIGHTS TOO!

My mom

walked through a much darker
and deeper tunnel

than I had ever walked.

And yet,

she never gave up

or looked back.

She simply kept trudging onward.

I was blessed to have a mom like that.

But foolishly...

I never counted my blessings.

Cheer up, son.

I'm always on your side.

MOM

The person you have called...

Hello?

Are you Mr. Choi Yee-jae's mother?

Yes.

What is this regarding?

My goodness.

Please confirm his identity.

Yee-jae.

Mom is here.

Let's go home.

Wake up.

Yee-jae.

Yee-jae.

My poor baby shouldn't be lying here.

Mom's here to take you home.

Hurry and wake up. Come on.

Yee-jae.

It's your mom.

Open your eyes for me.

Please don't die, Yee-jae.

CHOI YEE-JAE

Death is contagious.

As I disappeared from the world...

Yee-jae!

my death

remained behind

with those who loved me.

When did you last see your son?

A week ago.

Did he not show any signs of suicide?

I don't know.

Why do you think your son died?

I k*lled him.

It's due to my many faults.

Had he been born to a smarter woman,

this wouldn't have happened.

Such a smart kid.

- Your grandson's a year old already?
- Goodness.

- This rice cake is excellent.
- Congrats.

- I'll enjoy it.
- It looks delicious.

- Isn't your grandkid almost a year old?
- Here, Seon-hui.

- Yes.
- Gosh.

Thank you.

- I know, right?
- This looks great.

Totally.

- She's right.
- Already?

Seriously. They grow up so fast.

I've already become a grandma.

You're too young to be a grandma.

You can say that again.

- What?
- Here.

Buy some clothes for your grandson.

Gosh, there's no need for this.

It's fine, really.

Take this with you!

Wait...

Why would she give me this?

It's bad luck.

That's right.
You don't want it to rub off on you.

Don't get clothes for your grandson
with that money.

I'm not even going to invite her
to my daughter's wedding,

so you better keep quiet.

THE FUTURE DESTINY OF THE CHILD
IS ALWAYS THE WORK OF THE MOTHER

NAPOLEON

So you k*lled yourself
because your life felt hopeless?

Is that so wrong?

It's not like I did harm to anyone.

Think carefully

if you really didn't harm anyone.

I forgot about the dead girl's family
when it should have been obvious.

Of course you did.

You are a selfish brat
who fails to think about the sadness

the bereaved have to go through.

He thought I'd k*lled his daughter.

Of course, he'd want to k*ll me.

Then who would your mother want to k*ll?

Death had always known

what I had actually done wrong.

I experienced 12 painful deaths
as punishment for what I did.

The death that caused me the most pain

wasn't when I burned to death

or when my limbs were severed.

Ji-su...

It was the death of someone...

that I loved dearly.

The hellish pain
that I had put my mom through

had come right back to me.

I decided to continue living as my mom.

It was a punishment
that I decided to give myself.

The first subway train of the day

was full of people's parents

who were doing their best to get by.

Could I ever say

that I did my best in life before them?

I felt unbearably ashamed
of my own death.

HOUSING SUBSCRIPTION SAVINGS ACCOUNT
CHOI YEE-JAE

This savings account

is a gift that I prepared for you

so that you can buy a house later on.

Gosh.

Can't you take your time growing up

so we can live together for a long time?

The doors are closing.

Please step back for your safety.

THE BEGINNING OF YOUR SECOND LIFE
SEONA MEMORIAL PARK

What?

This is

the station near my columbarium.

Yee-jae.

Mom had been coming here

every day after work.

My son.

How have you been today?

How can I even call myself a mother
when I couldn't even save

my precious son?

I don't see why

I keep calling myself your mother
when I have no right to.

Yee-jae.

Remember how I asked you
to be my son in your next life too?

I take that back.

You should find parents

who are much richer and better than I am

so that you can live happily
in your next life.

I'll just watch you from afar

just to see

if you're living a good life.

I won't even act like I know you.

I'll just watch.

In return...

I hope you'll live out

your next life

until the very end.

I wanted to tell Mom that I was sorry

and that I wanted

to be born as her son once more

in my next life.

But none of my words

nor any of my feelings

could reach her.

That's just

how death is.

Mom, is there anywhere
you'd like to go with me?

I want to go to Mount Obong.

Mount Obong?

I used to go there often with your dad
when we were young.

Once I get a job,

I'll take you to Mount Obong.

Goodness.

My son is the best.

But you know what?

I can't go because of my weak knee.

Nonsense. I'll carry you
on my back if need be,

so hold on a little.

Even though it was late,

I wanted to show Mom

the place she used to visit with Dad

when they were young and loved to hike.

How beautiful.

Mom.

I'm sorry that I forgot.

I'm so sorry

I didn't keep my promise.

Is anyone out there?

Help me.

Please...

You can't die like this.

Please don't die, Mom.

Please don't die.

Thank you for still being alive, Mom.

Yee-jae.

Hurry and wake up.

Let's go home.

Please don't die, Yee-jae.

Mom.

You can't die like this.

Please don't die, Mom.

As I desperately wished
for my mom's survival,

I felt the same desperation she had felt

when she sobbed
upon seeing my cold body in the morgue.

I'm sorry.

I made a grave mistake.

To fulfill my mom's wish

for me to live on until the end,

I had to...

go on living.

I lived for 32 years...

which was longer
than the time I lived as Choi Yee-jae...

in remembrance...

of the people

to whom I've said goodbye.

You can't really say you're living

when you live in constant fear.

But since I was a coward,

I always lived in constant fear.

Afraid that the world
wouldn't recognize my worth,

that I would fall behind my peers,

and that I would be rejected,

I ended up taking my own life

due to this fear

before my life could even blossom.

I only realized after dying

that life in itself

was an opportunity.

And the pain
that I thought engulfed my whole life

was only a small part of it.

A clear day.

A rainy day.

A windy day.

I learned that life

was made up of these different days.

And that it was okay to fail

as long as I kept going.

It was only after
I ended up inside my mom's body

that I finally

realized this.

I never thought I'd say this...

but I missed you so much.

It's just that I didn't realize

it'd take this long to see you again.

Did it?

I have trouble
sensing the passage of time.

I did think
it took longer than usual, though.

It was plenty long enough for me.

And

I spent all that time
thinking about what I should do

when I met you again.

I'm begging you.

Can you please

sh**t me again

just once more?

I already used up all the b*ll*ts
allocated to you.

I know.

I do,

but please give me a chance

to live as myself just once more.

Let me have another go at life
as Choi Yee-jae.

I'm begging you.

Please.

Why?

I want to give my mom
a hug one last time.

You said that you would beat me

playing by the rules I have created.

You won.

What?

You managed to avoid death and survive.

You received
your punishment from me in full.

All that is left for you now
is God's judgment.

And before that happens,

I'll give you one more b*llet.

Really?

You will be given the
chance you asked for

if this g*n ends up firing.

What if it doesn't?

Then you will be in God's hands.

MOM

Mom.

♪ Are you standing at
the edge of the world? ♪

THERE IS ONLY ONE YOU IN THIS WORLD

♪ Unable to cry out loud ♪

♪ You struggle to call out the name ♪

♪ Of the person you loved ♪

♪ The only one you loved ♪

♪ It's okay to cry out loud ♪

♪ Until your cries are heard ♪
♪ In the distant future ♪

♪ If you happen to encounter today ♪

♪ I hope there's no pain ♪

♪ Or despair left ♪

♪ Are you still standing there? ♪

♪ Are you afraid to turn back? ♪

♪ The face I somberly remembered ♪

♪ The person I'm grateful for ♪

♪ The person I owe ♪

♪ Although there's no
miracle we hoped for ♪

♪ Nor the strength to
get back on our feet ♪

♪ Listen to the voice
that embraces you ♪

♪ "I love you" ♪

♪ "I love you" ♪

♪ If you're still hesitating ♪

♪ I hope you find the courage ♪

♪ To stand up again ♪

♪ And overcome it ♪