01x06 - Penn Gets Nailed

[bunniefuu]

Here's TV's very own
Mr. Magic, Jonathan Ross!

Thank you very much. Thank you so much.
Thank you so much.

Thank you very much indeed.

Well, welcome everybody.
Hello, it's Penn and Teller: Fool Us,

where talented young magicians
attempt to bamboozle the bamboozlers,

the great Penn and Teller.

Over the next hour,
we'll show you illusions

that will leave you more dazzled
than Simon Cowell's dental hygienist.

Who has to wear sunglasses.

To get on the show tonight
has taken ultimate dedication.

For example, I've been told that to master
the cutting a lady in half trick,

takes not only years of practice,
but also at least 20 assistants.

The idea tonight is to try and fool
two of the greatest magicians of all time,

even if they do look like the two odd boys
always picked last on sports day.

Here they are, it's Penn and Teller.

Mr. Teller. Mr. Penn.

Hey, Jonathan, how are you doing?

Great stuff, take your seats.

And we'll get started
with the business of the night,

as we meet out first contender.

Cubic act.

I'm Maxime.

I'm Bertox.

Cubic Act was created
in the circus school two years ago.

Cubic Act is a stage illusion
with a new presentation.

It's a timeless act. Strange act maybe.

We want to break the stereotype
with the stage illusions.

It's classic tricks,
but we change things

and now the magicians are confused.

They don't understand
everything in the act. We will see!

What do you get if you put two French men
with a mysterious box under a street lamp?

You get a punch line not suitable
for Saturday night television,

but you also get
our next fabulous performance,

please welcome Cubic Act!

Cubic Act,
ladies and gentlemen.

Merveilleux, formidable,
very good, really lovely.

You know what's great is, I'm watching
the audience as well as watching you,

and everyone was like,
"Wow, how are they doing that?"

You've fooled them, there are
the two you gotta worry about,

fooling those guys, there.

Let me ask you, I have a microphone here
if you'd like to hold it.

How long have you been
doing this, this act for?

- Okay... it's for you.
- No.

Yeah, I am French...
English very, very hard for me.

So, to me...

Um...

The Cubic Act, I did it, cinq...
six years ago with another person,

and one year and a half,
with Bertox and Léopoldine.

Okay. And you're the one
who speaks English well! So, that's...

Oh yeah! As you can see, as you can see!

Fellas, I'm sure you'll agree, that was
a spectacular performance, wasn't it?

Oh yes. I will start by saying,

unequivocally, absolutely,
you fooled me. Completely.

Thank you.

Halfway there. Halfway to Vegas.

That puts you flying
right over the Statue of Liberty.

You gotta go all the way to Vegas,
that means you have to fool Teller,

and I will also tell you,

that what Teller has written down here,
is a guess.

And we are hoping, very much,
that he's wrong.

Because we want you to go to Vegas.

I think it's the best
big-illusion stage act, I've ever seen.

Wow, that's... that incredible!

It's fabulous, and Teller has...

And I want to stress,

I want to stress, that this is a guess.

So take a look here,

and see, maybe Teller
can talk to you, a little bit,

because I'm completely, I'm with you.

I'm gonna have a look,
I'm gonna have a peek.

- That's filthy!
- Yeah.

Now, keep that secret, Teller.

- Before you...
- Hold on a second,

before you shred it, Teller.

Let's just check.

Ladies and gentlemen, here,

did you fool them,
or do they know what you did?

- No.
- No. They know.

Teller is a very, very good magician,
and he know.

He know. He knows the trick!

Penn will be disappointed.

Monsieur Teller, yeah. Thank you.

But you fooled everyone else.

Well, I looked at the picture,
and I still don't know what you guys did.

Wonderful job.

- Thank you.
- That was incredible.

So good. So good.

Thank you.

Let's say again, thank you, to Cubic Act,
ladies and gentlemen!

Bon chance! Au revoir!

Let's go right on
and meet our next contender.

Nick Einhorn.

My name, is Nick Einhorn.

I've been performing magic professionally,
for the last 16 years.

Ten years ago, I was asked
to write a magic book, for the public.

And since then,
I've written a selection of books,

which, luckily for me, have sold
over 500,000 copies all over the world.

What I love about magic,

is that moment of wonder
that you can give to people,

and just make them
concentrate on something,

which, hopefully is so magical,
that it just, blows their minds.

There's no specific area
in which I specialize, it's kind of a...

Jack-of-all-trades, master of none.
That's not good is it? No.

The venue we're at tonight,

hosts a magic night,
once every couple of months.

I'm gonna be trying out what I hope to do
on the night, for Penn and Teller.

And this is a great opportunity for me,
to do it in front of a live audience.

Burger and fries!

I've just come off-stage and things
didn't actually go as well as I'd hoped.

Something pretty important
went horribly wrong, actually.

Enjoy the rest of your evening, thank you.

I was pretty sure I was
gonna nail this, and I didn't.

And if that happens on the night,
then that's it, I'm out.

I've got my fingers crossed hoping,
for much better luck for him, tonight.

Would you please welcome, Nick Einhorn!

Thank you!

Thank you, very much.

Recent research has suggested
that under pressure,

women make better decisions than men.

Well, this evening,

I'm gonna put the power
of a woman's intuition to the test.

I'm gonna do that by choosing a woman,
completely at random,

from tonight's audience.

And... there's a lady just here!
Hi, what's your name?

- Catherine.
- Catherine, you look random to me.

Could you stand up for us?

I'm going to ask you
a couple of questions,

and I want you
to answer these questions, impulsively.

And if your instinct is right,
then what we're about to do tonight,

whilst not impossible,
will be highly improbable, okay?

Now I've combined my two loves,
magic and food.

And behind me, on my right hand side,
are three of my favorite dishes.

Behind me here are three tables.

Your first task, is to decide,
which table to serve which dish to.

So let's start off with this dish here.

And would you like this served
to table number one, two or three?

Two.

Table number two. Excellent.

Now, let's go back for the next one.

Would you like this at table number one,
or table number three?

- One.
- One. Do you want to change your mind?

No, I'm gonna go with one.

- Still table number one?
- Yeah.

Excellent. All right.
That leaves the final one,

Which has to go... To table number three.

Super.

Now, we need to find
three hungry looking men

from tonight's audience,
who are gonna represent our diners,

for the next few moments.

So, I'd like you to randomly choose
any three men, from tonight's audience.

If you would go ahead and point
at anybody, here this evening.

- One.
- Hi, sir, what's your name?

- Jack.
- Jack,

could you stand up where you are, please?
Thank you. And somebody else?

- Two.
- Your name, sir, is?

- Daniel.
- Daniel, please stand up.

That's great, and one more person.

And the guy over there, in the hat.

Yes, good. All the way back, here.
Super. Your name, sir, is?

- Wayne.
- Wayne.

Gentlemen, I'm going to
ask you to join me.

If you need reading glasses,
please bring them with you.

As you come up, we'll give you
a name badge and a microphone.

Everyone else will give you
a huge round of applause.

Thank you, for joining me, guys.

- You've got your name badges.
- Yep.

Okay, Catherine.

Catherine, we've got
some more decisions to make, here.

You have to choose
which of these envelopes,

blue, red and yellow,
each of these guys get.

So, let's start with Daniel,
should he get the blue,

the red or the yellow envelope?

- Red.
- The red envelope for Daniel.

So, Daniel, if you could
take hold of that, for me?

Thank you very much,
and what about the blue envelope?

Jack or Wayne?

- Wayne.
- Wayne gets the blue envelope,

which, Jack, leaves you
with the yellow envelope.

Would you like to swap
any of the envelopes around?

Swap the yellow and the red. Yeah.

Bugger.

Okay. Do you think Wayne looks like a man

who should be sitting
at table one, two or three?

Two.

Go and sit at table number two please,
Wayne. What about Jack?

- Three.
- Go and sit at table number three,

and, Daniel, you have to go
to table number one,

you have the longest to walk.
Thank you, very much.

Now, before they get too comfortable,
do you want to switch them around?

Maybe change the men's order, at all?

- No. I'm good.
- Okay then, your job is done.

Now let me just confirm
a couple of things.

First of all, I chose you completely
at random from tonight's audience.

Yes, you did.

You placed those meals, those plates,
down on the table in any order you wanted

and you could have changed your mind.

Then you chose three random men
from tonight's audience,

then you gave them an envelope

and you could have changed the order,
in fact you did.

Then you sat them down in this order,
and even when I asked,

you didn't change your mind, you said
you're happy with the order they're in.

Yes.

Your intuition, led you
to this point in time,

and this is what it's all been about.

Gentlemen, could I ask you
to open your envelopes, please?

Inside your envelopes, there'll be
a message, a message for each of you.

I'm gonna start off at table number one,

and ask you, please, Daniel,

to slowly and clearly,
to read, your message.

A man by the name of Daniel,
will be asked to sit at table number one,

where he will be served
chicken tikka masala and pilau rice.

Well hang on a just a moment,

from all of these people,
you did pick a man called Daniel,

- Yes.
- who's sitting at table number one.

Let's see if you served him
the right meal.

So you're at table number two,

would you please,
slowly and clearly, read your message?

Wayne will be instructed
to sit at table number two,

where he'll be served burger and fries.

Well again, Wayne is sitting
at table number two,

but has he got a burger and fries?

Yes!

Which leaves you at table number three,

would you please,
slowly and clearly, read your message?

Which leaves Jack,
sitting at table number three,

where he'll enjoy a pizza.

This is Jack, this is table number three,
and this, is a pizza!

Catherine, thank you for
making all the right decisions.

Your intuition is doing
so well, this evening.

Have a good evening,
thank you, good night.

Mr. Nick Einhorn, ladies and gentlemen,
wasn't that incredible?

- Nick. Remarkable.
- Thank you.

- Wonderful stuff.
- Hungry?

Well, I am a bit, I can smell the food,
it smells good. That was remarkable.

I'm not particularly good with numbers,
I can add up and stuff

but I know, every time you add something

given a multiple choice or something,

the permutations get bigger
and bigger and bigger.

- Absolutely.
- So there were probably,

three initially you chose,

and then the three
had the three envelopes.

At least 40 billion.

Then suddenly, dozens, if not hundreds,
of permutations,

- That could have gone any which way.
- Yes, it could.

Let's find out what Penn and Teller think.
Look at that, Penn's swinging his leg,

and Teller's kind of given up.

I think frankly, he's not even...
Okay. What do you think?

We believe, that your audience selection
was really random.

That it took a while
to get the people up on stage.

That time may not seem like much
to a layperson, but to a magician,

that seems like enough time, for you
to very clearly, have in your head,

the people's names.

And of course, you already know
what the food is gonna be,

and there's the three tables.
And then she gave them the envelopes.

Then you asked her
if she wanted to change her mind.

And she did.

And then with things
completely out of your hands,

they switched the envelopes.
The guys did. Without you touching them.

Then they walked over to the table,
and you gave them another chance...

To switch. And she didn't.
But she could have.

And then they opened up the envelopes,

and it had not just the food on it,

but the names of the guys,
which you knew, you asked them.

But it was at the right table.
With the right food.

And she switched them
over here without you touching...

Now to a layperson,

that is a remarkable trick,
wouldn't you agree?

Absolutely, remarkable.

With very close to a century,

of combined knowledge of magic,

Teller's huge magic library, in Las Vegas,

we are able to work together
and talk back and forth with a sketchpad,

and with that information, we were fooled.

That's amazing!

Dead fooled. We have no idea.
No clue. You deserve it.

Nick Einhorn, ladies and gentlemen!

Thank you very much. Thank you.

Let me be clear, I don't mean,

it could be this,
it could be that, we chose this.

No idea? No idea?

I mean not a clue.

I mean, if you put a g*n to my head

and said,
"Take a guess, how did he do it?"

I would say tell my family I love them.

Okay, can I say...

We'll go and sit down while you
take the stage, man. It was great.

Thank you so much.

If you were on it, I'm going to k*ll you.

What a lovely, lovely piece of work.
That was so beautifully done, wasn't it?

Let's meet our next challenger.

Michael Vincent.

{\an8}My name is Michael Vincent,
and I'm very passionate about magic.

I performed last time on the TV special
with Penn and Teller

and it was a hugely enjoyable process.

I was a little bit apprehensive
about trying to fool

two of the most knowledgeable magicians
on the planet.

Watch the right hand, watch that red ace.

The quickness of the hand
deceives the eye.

In terms of my performance,

I believe it was the perfect trick
in the perfect situation.

There was no trick deck whatsoever used.

This is what a person can do
with just their hands and a deck of cards.

After my performance,
I remember feeling immensely proud.

This is not hours, not days,
this is decades of practice to do this.

Old school magic.

I decided to come back

because I believe I have what it takes
to fool Penn and Teller.

That's it, in a nutshell.

Please welcome, Mr. Michael Vincent!

Jonathan, Penn, Teller,
would you like to join me at the table?

- Certainly.
- Let's make them welcome.

Thank you.

So good to see you again.

Great to see you again, buddy, how are ya?

Great. Good, very good.

And here we go.

I'd like you to give the cards
your best shuffle.

Whenever you're satisfied,
leave them down on the table.

While you're doing that,
I have another deck,

a red deck, for visual contrast.

And this trick begins
the way every other card trick begins.

Mr. Penn. Pick a card, any card.
Look at it, remember it, don't forget it.

- Should I show it to the audience?
- Yes, please.

And slightly unconventional,

I want you to write your name
on the back of the card.

- On the back?
- Not the face, but the back.

Jonathan, would you mind reaching forward?
Pick a card, any card.

Okay, look at the card, remember it.

And I'd like you to write your name
on the back as well.

Are you happy
that the cards are shuffled, sir?

Okay. Down on the table.

Thank you. I don't want you
to feel left out either,

so, please, take one out for us.

Okay. Thank you.

Look at the card, remember it,
and I'll take this pen

and if you'd like to write your name
on the back, as well? Thank you.

I didn't show the audience,
should I?

Yes, show them
the cards as well.

It's very important that you do remember
the cards, as well. Very important.

Splendid, I'll take the pen back.
Thank you.

Considering that you've written your name
on the back, we now have a marked deck.

- Yes we do.
- Intriguing.

So, we're gonna pop your card
roughly, about here,

Okay?

How many cards would you say are on top
of your card right now, give or take?

- Around twelve.
- Twelve cards.

That means, Jonathan, we can pop yours
roughly around the middle of the deck.

Thank you. And...

Mr. Teller, we'll pop yours
slightly, near the bottom.

So, with all three cards
in different positions,

I'm going to attempt the impossible, now,

and let's find all three cards
without ever touching this deck, again.

Tell me, are you right handed
or left handed?

Perfect. Can you go like this for me?
Excellent.

And put your hand on top.

Don't move.
I won't touch those cards again.

The thought occurred to me,
to use a different deck

to find the exact three cards,
but in order to do that

I have to use what's known in the trade
as intuitive insight.

- Are you familiar with that?
- Sure.

Perfect. Well let me explain
to those of you who don't.

You can reach a level of performance
which goes beyond conscious thought,

and that's the idea.

So right now, all I need you to do
is just concentrate for me.

My instincts tell me to stop right here,

for the first time,
what was the name of your card?

King of spades.

Lo and behold, the king of spades!

Okay, one down, two to go.

Jonathan, just concentrate for me.

Because this card is
no longer in the deck,

I've got to recalibrate by one card.

My instincts tell me to cut one more time.

I think I'm gonna go
with this one right here.

- What was the name of your card?
- Eight of hearts.

The eight of hearts? Lo and behold,
ladies and gentlemen, the eight of hearts.

King of spades, eight of hearts.
Do you know what we'll do this time?

I'm gonna do the next one without talking.

However, if I get your card right,
you can give me a high five,

or a thumbs up.

I have a slight confession,

although this is a complete trick,
it's slightly incomplete for one reason.

Although these are the cards you chose,
they're not the exact selections,

the ones you signed
your names on the back,

because they were under your hand,
inside the deck.

But I want to push the boundaries
of what's possible,

so if I can just capture
the spirit of all three cards,

I believe, Mr. Penn,
this is how you sign your name.

Looks like my sloppy signature.

Jonathan,
I believe your signature

will now be worth millions on eBay.

And, Mr. Teller,
I think this card speaks for itself.

Thank you.

Michael Vincent, ladies and gentlemen.
That was remarkable, let's go over here.

Just give them a bit of space, there. Wow.

It takes a brave man
to come out here and do an illusion

in front of two of the masters, anyway.

They will know where to look,
I mean, we're...

Let's face it, we're idiots.

Muggles, is the word for it.

Muggles, okay, we're non-magical people.

Yeah, I got that.

But they know, I guess,
if they were doing it,

where things would be going on.

Possibly.

So do you have to work
extra hard to conceal stuff?

Or do you just do
as good a job as you can?

You do the best job you can,

while recognizing it's hard to misdirect
a professional magician.

'Cause misdirection and psychology is all
part of the heartbeat of real magic.

Are you ready, fellas? Can we come on in?

We're going in.

I don't think that looks like
you're too confident.

It's incredible.

Have you ever seen that trick before?
Is that your original trick?

It's the first time it's been
seen on television.

It's just beautiful.

- Thank you so much.
- It's beautiful, so...

And... we know your hands,
and we know how good your hands are,

and when your name came up,
before they even showed the package,

I had a little bit of terror in my heart.

You are about my favorite performer.

I will say, however, that...

Once again, and you know this
better than anyone there,

I'm gonna speak
a little bit of double talk, here.

Are we talking cryptic language here?

- A little bit.
- Got it, okay.

They force you, on television,
to put Teller at the educational angle.

Okay, I got that.

- And me at the other educational angle.
- Right, okay.

So, the location, Teller got to see.

Yeah.

And then, the... should we say,
the add-on, I get to see.

Yeah.

And you're... The move that
I don't want to say thee name of,

but the way you put
the cards down on the table,

that is a move that
every magician needs to learn,

and I'm telling you,
I knew exactly what you were doing,

and could not see the slightest error.

So once again,
one of my favorite performers,

but you did not fool us.

And I hope you come back again.

Thank you, that's very kind.

Thank you so much.

Well done.

That is just about
as good as it gets, isn't it?

I wish we could convey to people that
he is doing the classic stuff.

This is stuff you read in books and say,
maybe some day I'll be able to learn it,

and you never see anyone
do it perfectly clean,

with no false moves or anything,
so for us...

I think, perhaps, we enjoyed that
more than the audience,

and the audience was k*lled by it.

- Yeah.
- It's fabulous.

Let's move right on and find out
who are our next contenders.

Morgan and West.

- Hello, everyone, my name's Rhys Morgan.
- I'm Rob West.

And we've been performing together
since about 1888.

Which in your calendar,
is about 2007.

I teach maths and a little bit of physics
at King Alfred's School in Wantage.

I teach chemistry and physics
at King Alfred's School in Wantage.

- We live together.
- We work together.

And we do our magic together.

We always present ourselves, always,
as Morgan and West, in this order.

Always, always, always.

- Sort of a Victorian Ant and Dec.
- Yeah.

- We drink a lot of tea.
- And we eat a lot of biscuits.

- Quite lot of biscuits.
- Yeah, you certainly.

Penn, Teller, with the absolute
best of intentions,

it's like the American
w*r of Independence.

The British are coming.

And we've brought biscuits.

They may well sound like
a medium-sized firm of insurance brokers,

but they are in fact, Morgan and West,
ladies and gentlemen.

- Mr. Morgan.
- Pleased to meet you.

- Mr. West, am I right?
- Lovely to meet you.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
My name is Rhys Morgan.

I'm Robert West.

Together we are Morgan and West.

- And not only are we magicians.
- Time travelers.

And all-round spiffing chaps.

We are also tourists.

Fourth dimensional tourists.

- And on our travels through time.
- And space.

- We've met loads.
- We mean loads.

Of very famous people.

And tonight is no exception.

So let's give one more big hand
for Mr. Jonathan Ross!

- Thank you.
- If I could ask you stand there, for me?

Where, here? In the middle, here? Okay.

Now, Mr. Ross, on our travels we've made
something of an album

of all the famous people we've met.

So, there you see Charles Darwin.
There's Mahatma Gandhi.

There's Marilyn Monroe.

I imagine you've seen
a silhouette album before.

Could you give those
a nice thorough mixing for me?

- A shuffle?
- Yes, a nice thorough shuffle.

Now, Mr. Ross, we'd very much
like to add you to our collection,

whilst we go about this,
we thought we'd do you a magic trick.

You happy those had a thorough shuffle?

Yeah, I've shuffled them as well as I can.

Marvelous, if you can go and sit down
over there for me, Mr. Ross? Splendid.

I'll put these down here.

And hold your hand out
nice and flat for me.

Perfect.

Now, you see, as well as being adept
at cutting silhouettes, Mr. Ross,

Mr. Morgan is exquisite
at talking about them.

- Rather.
- So even though he cannot see these,

he should be able to tell you

- whoever you are merely thinking about.
- Okay.

Now, Mr. Ross, you are of course going to
have to keep rather still, whilst posing.

So, Mr. West is going to
turn over the silhouettes one by one.

I'd just like you to focus on the person
that you can see and think about them.

Mr. Ross. Think about this person.

You are thinking about... an entertainer,
this is a lady, a wonderful lady.

- Ginger Rogers, am I right.
- It is.

Fantastic. Sorry the silhouette's
not so good on that one.

- Would not stop moving.
- That, is a strange silhouette.

She wouldn't stop dancing,
we had to cut it out as she went.

Okay, think about this one for me.

Okay.

Just focus on that person
there for me, you are thinking...

Of the wonderful scientist Marie Curie,
am I right?

- Yes, absolutely!
- Fantastic. Lovely. Next.

And, Mr. Ross,

you're happy there's no way that
Mr. Morgan can see through

the back of these cards
against the light, yes?

They're completely opaque.
There's no way you can see through them.

And, there are no sort of markings
or anything for him to read or anything?

No, none at all.

So, you're happy this is
genuine psychic ability?

Well, I wouldn't go so far as to say that,

but certainly, I can't see
how you could be doing it.

- Next one please.
- Just think of this person.

This is an author.

This is C.S. Lewis. Am I right?

- That's right.
- Fantastic.

Mr. Ross, would you lift your chin
a little, please? Thank you so much.

Think of this person.

And this time...
Florence Nightingale.

- Yes, correct again.
- Fantastic. Next.

Think of that person.

{\an8} And... the great Harry Houdini.

{\an8}-It is the great Harry Houdini.
- Superb.

I think, actually,
we're quite short on time, so...

None of these people
are very famous actually, no.

And this one?

Um... and... uh...
Alexander Graham Bell. Always talking.

Yes.

{\an8}-Always on the phone.
- Always on the phone, yes. Next.

{\an8} Um... And this... uh...
Abraham Lincoln.

It is, and it's so nice to hear
all these names

- on Saturday night ITV again.
- Yes.

- It's been a while for most people.
- It's been a while for all of us.

To save time, could you take about
half of those perhaps and give them to me?

- About half? Give them to you?
- Splendid.

- I believe Mr. Morgan is about done.
- Yes, I am pretty much finished.

Next you can turn them over yourself
if you would like.

- You want me to do this?
- Yes, please.

Just focus on that person.
You are Shirley Temple.

- Yes.
- Lovely.

{\an8}- Thomas Edison.
- Yes.

{\an8}- Virginia Woolf.
- Yeah.

{\an8}- Vera Lynn.
- Yes.

Every single one!
A round of applause for Mr. Ross.

Wow. Congratulations.

Mr. Ross, just stand and face me.

- Fabulous.
- This is for you.

This is for you.

Morgan and West, ladies and gentlemen!

That was quite something.

That was tremendous fun.

Can I ask you, how long do you spend
on your male grooming,

on your... the facial foliage?

- Quite a while. Some hours a day...
- It's quite a routine.

I haven't seen anything like this myself,
I don't know whether Penn and Teller have.

Do you think they will be familiar
with this kind of illusion?

I imagine they may have
done their histories.

Okay, well, let's find out now
whether you're going to go to Vegas,

if you happened to fool them.
How'd they do fellas?

It breaks our heart to say this,

because of how much we love
the whole idea of y'all,

but when Jonathan went and took the seat,
after he had shuffled, so badly,

those cards, we saw you do
that sneaky, awful move

you didn't want us to see you do.

Shall I say more?

What kind of move are we
talking about here? Just so we know.

- A deck switch.
- A deck switch?

Well, let me ask you, would such a phrase
mean something to you?

It's fair to say that
that means something to us, but...

That means something to us,
and if there was a deck switch then...

We couldn't do this...

Or that.

What do you mean?

That's empty, this is empty,
there was no deck switch.

There was no deck switch?

Well, we saw you do it.

We saw as you went across,
you monkeyed underneath that.

I think it's worth saying at this point,

that every single card
that Jonathan shuffled,

was on Jonathan's hand
in the order he shuffled it.

- That is an absolute promise.
- You, you did not do...

- You did not do not switch the deck, then?
- No.

We did not switch out that deck.

- So, there was no switch.
- So, there was nothing at all done,

from the time Jonathan shuffled the deck,

to the time Jonathan sat down
and you put it on his hand?

We did not switch out the cards
that Jonathan shuffled.

I think, if there was
no deck switch, then...

Well did... let me just
ask you something...

- Oh, never mind just ask you something!
- No, no, no, no.

Did you, just to monkey with us,

do a move that looked tricky
in order to lead us astray?

- No.
- No.

Oh, you didn't.

- Well what the...
- Do you just naturally walk around

looking like
you're switching decks without...

Well, then I gotta, one more thing,
I've got one more thing to say.

You fooled us.

Yeah!

- Jolly well done.
- Thank you very much.

Congratulations. Felicitations.
Have a great journey.

Ladies and gentlemen, Morgan and West!
Fabulous pair.

I thought you must have had it.

Do you have an inkling even now
how it was done?

We have a pretty good idea now.

Well it's too late. Okay. So, now...

Tonight two people have
managed to fool Penn and Teller,

they'll be playing
on their stage in Las Vegas,

that's incredible isn't it?
Congratulations.

Okay. I've loved
all the performers tonight,

but this the bit I've been
most looking forward to.

If you're of a nervous disposition,
or if you work for health and safety,

look away now.

Because playing Russian roulette
with a pneumatic nail g*n

for your pleasure,
and, if you're watching, Simon Cowell,

this is real Saturday night entertainment,
all right?

Will you please welcome on stage,
the fabulous, the unique, Penn and Teller!

Thank you.

Now, this magic trick, is kind of
about memorization,

kind of about focus

and kind of about concentration.

Now memorization acts have been
out of fashion for many, many years.

We tried to make our version,
a little bit less totally cerebral

by adding in a nail g*n.

And I hope you're all aware
of how bad, nail g*ns are.

They're responsible for about


in the United States.

And that's compressed air over there,

and it's forcing out the nails
with a great deal of power.

Certainly enough power to go
all the way through that board,

into another board,
and fasten them together

for construction purposes,
but I've thwarted that

by putting the board on a metal table

so the nails stick out a little bit.

Now we're talking about memorization.
And the trick looks like this.

Now the nail g*n is loaded right here.

And it's loaded with
what's called a string.

Which is two pieces of rigid plastic
that holds the nails perpendicular,

equidistant from one another.

When you pull the nails out of the string,

whenever the nail g*n
comes to one of those spaces,

it still fires the air
and makes the noise.

But it does not fire a nail.

So all I have to do
is memorize this sequence,

and I can do this.

That's the trick.

Now you've noticed by now
that I'm not just alternating,

as a matter of fact,

the pattern does not repeat,
for the whole trick.

Now if you'd seen
a memorization act in vaudeville,

there obviously would
not have been a nail g*n.

It would have all been done
with numbers and words.

The performer would have gotten maybe 40

single digit numbers
yelled out by the audience,

memorized that almost random sequence

and then written it back perfectly
on a chalk board while reciting

a Shakespeare sonnet
chosen by the audience.

And this is the exact same trick.

Just like wire walking.

It's the same trick if the tight-wire
is set four feet off the ground,

as if it's set 50 feet off the ground.

And yet, if you add
a little bit of danger,

Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh!
Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh!

Bang! Bang! Bang!

Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh! Puh!

Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!

Puh!

When you add a bit of danger to the bill,

it makes the whole show

just a little more

visceral.

A little more exciting.

Now most...

Most memorization acts
are magic tricks, they're lies.

And we don't mind you knowing that.

Because Teller and I believe
it is morally wrong,

to do things on stage
that are really dangerous.

It makes the audience complicit
in unnecessary human risk.

If you have any doubts
about this being a lie.

I think that proves it, right there.

Penn and Teller, ladies and gentlemen.

Remarkable! Fabulous! Awesome! Wow!

Ladies and gentlemen, the brilliant
but clearly deranged, Penn and Teller.

That's it for tonight,
hope you can join us again.

See you next time everyone,
thanks for watching.