02x02 - The Invisi-Ball Thread

[bunniefuu]

From the Rio
All-Suite Hotel in Las Vegas,

here's your host, Jonathan Ross.

Thank you, so much.

Welcome to Penn & Teller: Fool Us.

The show with illusions more convincing

than the story you told
your partner about what you did

the last time you came to Las Vegas.

Backstage are some
of the greatest magicians in the world.

Now, they're not here to fool me
because, of course, that would be easy.

Why, only last year, I gave all
my life savings to a Nigerian prince.

No, tonight our acts have the harder task
of trying to dupe the un-dupable,

the great Penn and Teller.

Now, leaving Teller speechless
is pretty much a given,

but having Penn shut up means
you've done something really remarkable.

Here they are right now.
Will you please go crazy

for magic's version of Donnie and Marie.
It is, of course, Penn and Teller!

Great to see you, as always.
Penn, fabulous, you're looking great.

Thank you, Jon.

I'm a little bit country.
He's a little bit rock 'n' roll.

That's the way we like to roll.
So, ladies and gentlemen,

I'm gonna ask you guys
to get comfortable in your seats

so we can get on with the show.
It's Penn and Teller,

ladies and gentlemen!

Without further ado,
let's get the show going,

and let's bring out our first magician.

Hi, I'm Jon Armstrong,
and I'm originally from Orlando, Florida.

I am dyslexic, and school
was impossible for me.

But then I discovered comics,
and I could really enjoy them.

Growing up,
I always wanted to be a superhero.

Actually, I still want to be a superhero.

One of my proudest achievements was that
I was able to co-write my own comic book.

It's about a magician like myself.

Hold out your hand.

I'm attracted to magic
and comics for the same reason.

They're both these amazing
sort of art forms that allow the author,

the creator, to give their audience
a world they never thought was possible.

This next performer became
the resident magician at Disney World

when he was just 20 years old,
which means we know he can fool

a giant mouse and a talking duck,
but can he fool Penn and Teller?

Please welcome Jon Armstrong!

Thank you!
Wow, this is amazing.

It's an honor to be here.

I was wondering
if I can get you two gentlemen

to come and join me up here.
And Jonathan, you seem nice enough.

- I'll go here. You go there?
- Yeah, if you don't mind.

- It frightens me.
- I'll go here.

Uh, it's actually not me that's here
to fool you. It's this little guy here.

It's a suction cup attached
to a tiny dowel rod.

It is adorable.

I know.

What I'm gonna show you
is the most impressive thing

you'll ever see in your entire life.

Seriously, from this moment on,
your lives are gonna go downhill.

When I do this for little kids,
I feel bad.

All right, watch.

Thank you.

All right, all right.

Just kidding, but you can see
the little suction cup, you know,

that it's only supposed
to pick up one card at a time, right?

That's how it works.

But if you give it
a little bit of a rev, watch...

Till it works.

You guys just see this every day?
Is that the idea?

Check this out, check this out.
Make sure there's sticky tape,

nothing like that on 'em.

Check out the plunger.
Make sure it's a perfectly ordinary,

tiny plunger that you'd find
in any Barbie dream home.

- Yeah.
- Yes, okay, good.

Take it back.

We're in America.
What do we care about? Bulk.

You can do it, buddy. You can do it.

Oh!

Tiny plunger.

Now, the tiny plunger, he is educated,
he is learned, he understands things.

I'll show you what I mean by that.

Jonathan, give me
a number between 10 and 20.

- Uh, 15.
- Fifteen. Again!

Ready? Watch.

Please count those out loud,
down to the table.

One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight, nine,



- 15!
- Fifteen exactly!

Tiny plunger. Tiny plunger.

Now, he just doesn't
understand card quantity.

He understands card identity,

the difference between
one card and another card.

So let me show you what I'm talking about.

If you could just touch
one of those for me, please.

- Just grab it right out.
- Okay, sure.

Excellent, and, uh, what's gonna happen,

is take the card and show it around.

But I'm gonna have to hide
the plunger so he doesn't see.

Everybody see the card? Yes?

Good. I'm gonna put the plunger back.
Don't let him see.

He tried to look at it.

Yeah, okay.
And place it back inside there for me.

Good. Okay.

The tiny plunger will now memorize

the entire deck of cards.

He has done so.

Please whisper the name
of your card to the tiny plunger.

Most people just pick it up,
but that was pretty awesome.

But the tiny plunger now
knows what the card is...

I didn't want to touch it.

And he knows the order of the deck,

so he should be able to do the following.

Oh, come on!

Tiny plunger.

I love this act!

Thank you!

I love it!

One last time, one last time,
because I don't want you

walking out of here thinking
I'm doing this.

It's not me, it's him.

I know! I know it's him!

Yeah, it's him.
I'm his manager, but nothing else.

So I'll prove it.

If you wouldn't mind, Teller,
please touch a card.

Pick it right out of there. Thank you.

And now, again, I'll hide my
eyes so I can't see anything.

But the plunger's looking right at it.

Oh... Oh, really?

- Yeah.
- Oh.

Oh, yeah, he saw it. Sorry.

Uh, here, hide the plunger
in your hand so he can't see it.

Excellent. And just go ahead

and just reach in there for me
and grab out a new one?

Got it? Excellent.

All right, show that card around
to everybody, and I won't look.

Good, good, good!

Excellent. And, uh...

You could just place it back
inside here wherever you like.

And that's where you wanted it, right?

I'm not changing its location?

I'm not even gonna shuffle.

- May I have it?
- Yeah.

Last time, the plunger
had to be spoken to, to know the card.

You don't speak as much, so this case,

the plunger, yeah, will read your mind.

Hold on... Yeah, go ahead.

Uh, concentrate.

Concentrate.

Hold on. Done.

It goes away in about a week.

All right.

Now, he's a sentient plunger.
He knows what he wants.

So, you're gonna do this for me, not me.

The plunger and you
are just gonna go bonk, bonk.

Bonk, bonk. And when you do that, he will
cut, hopefully, back directly to the card.

Tiny plunger.

Thank you very much.

That was quite something, wasn't it?

Holy Moly!

So...

Here's the cool thing, now. I'm allowed
to sit at the table with the guys,

and I could hear... I could see Penn
just like, uh, amazed by it,

and he was groaning sometimes,

'cause you could see he was getting...

And Teller was laughing at the whole thing
and loving every second of it.

I don't think they have
the faintest idea yet how you did that,

so you're in with a good chance, I think.

- Maybe.
- Can I touch the plunger?

- Yeah, of course!
- Okay.

I'm want to ask the audience,
has anyone ever seen anything

quite that small get such
a big reaction before?

That really was quite something.

Let me ask you something
else about yourself, because...

And this struck a note with me.

You were pretty severely
dyslexic when you were young.

That is very true. I'm still dyslexic.
I'm extremely dyslexic.

My children were both with that as well.

I know it poses a lot of challenges.

Did it help or hinder
the magic in any way?

I think, in some ways,
it obviously hindered it,

because of me reading from books.
It was very hard.

But in some ways, it makes me
think of the world differently,

and that's where weird things
like coming up with a plunger card trick,

- that's all where it came from.
- Yeah.

You know, when one struggles
through something like that,

to come out the other side,
and be as good as somebody as you are,

- that must feel just tremendous.
- Thank you.

Are you ready for me to come to you guys?

Uh, there's supposed
to be suspense at this moment,

but I will say, right off the bat,
you did not fool me.

- Okay.
- But that little plunger did.

But me... Me!

The little plunger fooled me.

I also don't know how to say this
with enough intensity,

but maybe the only

original card trick I've ever seen.

Oh, wow, thank you.
Thank you, thank you. Oh.

And also, the impression you get is,
you don't really touch the cards,

it's the plunger doing all that.

And there's something
so fair and so wonderful

and just so whimsical
about the whole thing.

The bad news is, about 40 years ago,
I teamed up with this guy.

Yeah, right.

And this guy has done very close
to a version of that trick,

and even though it took my breath away,

even though I needed a breather...

Teller actually saw me taking...

Being taken aback,

and my breath being sucked in,

and that gave him a big hint as to how
you put the whole thing together.

Did not fool Teller. I loved this act!

Ah, thank you very much.

Let me step in for just a second, though,

because when Penn was talking,

I noticed you, momentarily...

You shook your head,
and I got the feeling...

Oh, no, no, no, he... They're...
He knows how it works.

I'm just extremely honored.
This is awesome,

and thank you very much for having me on.

Oh, what a great routine!

So you did not fool them,
but thank you so much.

Jon Armstrong and his tiny plunger,
ladies and gentlemen!

Thank you, Jon.

Let's meet out next contender.

Bonjour.

Hi, everyone.

My name is Xavier Mortimer,
and I'm from France.

I'm so happy to be here in
Las Vegas, the city of magic.

A few years ago,
I was performing in Edinburgh.

In this festival, Cirque du Soleil saw me,

and they asked me if I wanted
to come and perform with them.

And I abandon
all my life that I had in Paris

to join one of the best
company in the world.

I like card tricks and classic magic,
but what I love is showing people

something that they
have never seen before.

More than just fooling,
it's about entertainment.

I like to bring people
to a different world,

without using words,

because movement
and emotion is international.

It's not just about the trick.

At the end of the day, I just want them
to say that they saw something beautiful.

Our next performer grew up in Paris,
under the shadow of the real Eiffel Tower,

dreaming of a day he could
perform magic here in Las Vegas,

under the shadow of the fake Eiffel Tower.

Will you join me in saying
bonne chance to Xavier?

Psst!

Psst!

Boo!

Ahhh!

Hey!

Hey!

- Boo!
- Ahhh!

Psst!

Ahhh!

Hey, psst! Hey, you!

No!

The fabulous Xavier,
ladies and gentlemen.

How great was that? Magnifique!

We've had performers on stage here,

and I think they're here
performing for us.

Here I felt that we entered
your world, I really did.

It was such a beautiful experience.
What inspires you?

What is it that you're hoping to achieve
when you perform like that?

Um, I was very much inspired
by physical comedy, and like,

you know, Charlie Chaplin,
and this kind of things.

So I tried to put some meanings
and, uh, story in my magic, so...

It's a little bit of reward, yes.

Well, let's go over to Penn, right now.

A lot of people
don't know that film was really...

Really pushed forward
by mostly French magicians.

I mean, they were...
They were big on that.

And you've continued that
with a great film-to-life.

Yeah. I was very inspired
by Georges Méliès. I love his work.

And if we had any doubt
about you truly being French,

you proved it with the music.

There's no doubt that,
that was French music.

What you've also done
is just a classic storytelling fantasy,

working all the way through,
and a film-to-life with an updated...

And a very nice and, uh...

Extensive handling

of a daylight séance gimmick,
which you use beautifully.

Just a wonderful, wonderful routine
that I just loved all the way through.

So with Penn using those
phrases like "daylight séance,"

which doesn't really mean
anything to the rest of us,

but I guess you guys
are on the same page here.

- They know what you were doing?
- Of course.

So you didn't fool them,
but you gave us a great time.

Xavier, ladies and gentlemen!

Thank you, Xavier. Congratulations.

For my own bit of magic,
watch as I conjure up our next contender.

My name is Greg Dow.
I'm from Las Vegas, Nevada,

and I'm a magician
that performs at corporate events,

trade shows, and private parties.

I love close-up magic the best.

I love seeing the look on people's faces

when the magic happens
right in front of them.

The thing about doing magic at corporate
events is, it's all very safe.

Magic for people in suits and ties.

You have to make sure
you don't offend anyone.

But sometimes,
the real me needs to come out.

So, I put on a mask,

not to hide my identity,
but to unleash it!

And that's when I become The Shocker!

How brave of this next magician,

performing right after his secret
identity was revealed to all of us.

Please welcome my hero, The Shocker!

Ladies and gentlemen, I am The Shocker!

And that's what it looks like
when Spider-Man has alone time.

I'm the world's best, and only,
pro-wrestling magician.

Which means I'm the guy that's
gonna pretend to kick your a*s

as I pretend to do Harry Potter stuff.

And this is a good-looking
audience tonight.

You guys are attractive!

I'm gonna take the mask off
just so I can see you guys better.

So tonight I am going
to attempt to read the minds

of some of the members
of the audience here.

Now, normally when I do this,
I have a tag-team partner,

someone who knows
my every thought before I think it,

my every move before I make it.

Unfortunately,
he could not be here tonight.

So instead, I brought
his mask along with me.

Now, this mask was made
from the tiger that bit Roy.

Ooh.

You hate that,
you're gonna hate my new rug.

Now, I'm gonna toss this mask
out into the audience to a gentleman.

He is gonna place it upon his head.

That will allow me to have
a mental connection with this guy.

I'm gonna go completely random here.

Place the mask on, you'll get
the giant-est round of applause

you've ever received in your life!

Now, here's what's gonna happen.

I'm gonna ask you a question.

You're gonna send me the answer
using the power of your mind.

I'm gonna write it down.
We're gonna see how it went.

Jonathan, if you would,
document our progress.

- My pleasure.
- Perfect!

Sir, if you would,
I want you to think of the name

of a woman that is important in your life.

But I don't want it to be
your mom or your sister,

because I want it to be one I don't know.

Oh!

Shocker!

Do you have the name?

- Yes.
- Send it to me

using the power of your mind.

That's a pretty name. All right.

I'm gonna lock that down

into envelope number one.

Just like that, you guys
can see it going in.

Let's peel this safety seal off.
That is locked in.

For the first time,
for our record-keeper Jonathan,

what is the name of the woman
you were thinking of?

- Donna.
- Donna!

- Donna.
- Please write down Donna.

Donna.

Take the mask.

Toss it behind you to a young lady.

There you go!
This young lady right here!

You're gonna place the mask on your head,

and I'm going to attempt
to read your mind.

I want you to think of your
favorite thing to do with a man.

Send it to me.

Interesting! All right.

I am going to write down
what you have sent me,

lock it in to envelope number two.

Now, what do you like to do with a man?

- Wrestle!
- Wrestle!

Well.

Not what he was hoping
you were going to say, by the way.

Toss the mask back up here, or give
it a little conga line on its way up.

There we go, it's gonna toss...
It's gonna come over the...

Perfect!

Now, since this is a magic competition...

By Vegas law, I have to do
something with a deck of cards.

So I'm gonna write down
what I think is going to happen

with the cards here.

Perfect! I have locked that in...

To envelope number three.

All the way in, sealed up.

In there. I'm gonna
come out to Penn and Teller.

If you would please, Teller,

select a card.

Perfect!

For the first time, so Jonathan
can write it down, Teller,

out loud, what card did you pick?

Let me try that again.
Penn, for the first time,

out loud for Jonathan,
what card did he pick?

The three of clubs.

Three of clubs.

Um...

What was it again?

The three of clubs.

Three of clubs.

The end might suck.

Let's take a look, though.
Let's go.

First, we went to this guy right here,

asked him the name
of a woman important in his life.

Locked it into envelope number one.

You said the name.
What did he say, Jonathan?

He said Donna.

Donna, and I wrote down the name.

Donna!

And then we went to this young
lady right here,

asked her favorite thing to do with a man.

Locked it in envelope number two!

She said she likes to...

- Wrestle!
- She likes to wrestle.

And I wrote down
that she likes to wrestle!

And then, we went to Penn and Teller.

Yes.

You picked the three of clubs.

Locked my prediction
into envelope number three.

I wrote down the, um...

Eight of diamonds.

- Aw.
- Aw.

Now, this is where it gets a little weird.

I'm not sure how you messed that one up.

Because every card I gave you

was the damn eight of diamonds!

So how about,

instead of you picking the wrong card,

I fix the prediction

to match the card you picked?

Three of clubs?

Three of clubs!

Shocker! Shocker! Shocker!

Ladies and gentlemen,
I'm The Shocker! Thank you!

And good night!

The Shocker,
ladies and gentlemen.

What a great finish.
Great style as well.

Earlier, we saw you in your
Greg persona, the corporate magician.

Now we're meeting The Shocker.

The two personalities, they ever
get mixed up, do they ever clash on stage?

Well, Greg had this girlfriend once...

Are you ready to give us your verdict?

The Shocker!

Boy, I just love acts
that go right to the edge there.

I will tell you, um,

with changing from the eight of diamonds

to the three of clubs,
you were one ahead of us there.

But, I also will just say

you probably don't want us to handle

that prediction at the end.
Is that right?

Well, I'm gonna say this.

You're on the right track,
and you can finish that thought,

or you can have the best damn
opening act you've ever had.

What do you guys think?

Shocker! Shocker! Shocker!

Are you happy?
You're confident that they kind of know

what they're talking about there?

I'm pretty sure these are smart guys here.

So they've got it down.
But what a great performance.

Wasn't he awesome, ladies and gentlemen?

Let's hear it again for The Shocker!

Shocker! Shocker! Shocker!

So now let's learn
all about our next trickster.

Hi. My name is Steven Brundage.
I grew up in Brooklyn,

but I currently live
in Saratoga Springs, New York.

Who here can actually solve
a Rubik's Cube?

When I was a kid, I got a Rubik's Cube,
and I basically locked myself in a room

and I started to learn how to solve it.

So I was doing magic for two years
full-time to make ends meet,

and then I had a viral video take off.

I was driving from a gig.
I got pulled over.

I told the officer I was a magician,

so he asked to see a trick.

From mixed up, in one hand,
and behind the back.

When I catch it again, take a look.

Holy

The viral video took off.
I got 15 million views total.

Since then, things have kind of taken off,

and I'm actually traveling
across the country to do gigs now.

Yes!

I have a girlfriend now,
and she's kind of out of my league,

but I think the magic helps a little bit.

I'm really excited to be on Penn & Teller.

Who knew so much could
happen from having a viral video?

Our next performer cut his
teeth as a street performer,

so you might want
to get your loose change handy

in case he passes around the hat
after what he's doing now.

Please welcome Steven Brundage!

Hi. Thank you so much for having me.

Uh, I'm gonna do something
really awesome with two Rubik's Cubes.

Um, I've always loved to solve it,

but I'm gonna try something
with Penn and Teller.

Can you guys join me up on stage, please?

Thank you so much.

Nice meeting you.

Nice to meet you, as well.
Thank you so much.

Perfect. So we'll get started.

So, Penn, I'm gonna need your help first.

- We have two Rubik's Cubes.
- Okay.

You can choose either one to mix up.
Your choice. It doesn't matter.

- I'll take that one.
- Perfect. I want you to mix it up.

Just like a deck of cards
is similar to a Rubik's Cube

in the fashion that it takes seven
shuffles with a deck of cards

before it's thoroughly randomized.

A Rubik's Cube is actually 20 moves.

So I want you to start to turn
and twist it up for me, please.

And any time you want,
I want you to say the word, "Stop."

When you say stop,
we're both gonna stop mixing for me.

Okay.

Stop!

- Right there.
- Yeah.

Perfect. I'll take it back.
You said stop,

and we both stopped mixing up
the Rubik's Cubes at the same, exact time.

Teller, do you mind
helping me out next, please?

Perfect. So we have two cubes here.

I want you to choose either one.

Go for it.
Whichever one you choose,

you're gonna hold it in your hand,

and when you open up,
it's gonna be solved.

Perfect.
So cover it up for me.

Perfect. Watch.

It's now solved.
Take a look.

Is it solved?

That would have been amazing, though.

It would have been great, yeah.

Can you picture the Rubik's Cube
one move away from being solved?

Uh, barely.

Barely. I'll give you a hint.
So that's basically one move away.

There's two, three, four...
The more you mix it up,

the harder the patterns on the cube

- are gonna be to recognize.
- Right.

We're gonna mix it up to about


So picture the Rubik's Cube
at 20 moves away.

Imagine in your mind

if the Rubik's Cube is maybe only


Picture at seven
what you're gonna see with the cube.

Imagine if the Rubik's Cube
is only one move away,

then finally, in your mind,
when it's completely solved,

let me know when you see it.

- It's completely solved.
- Just like that?

- Thank you.
- Yeah.

Yeah, that was good, but this time,
I'm actually gonna solve the Rubik's Cube.

This time, I'm gonna use
a paper bag that I have down here.

I want you to watch
all the different sides of the cube.

You can see there's no patterns
or big blocks on the cube,

so you know it's thoroughly mixed up.

I want you to watch.
We're gonna place it in the bag.

This is the coolest part of the show.

Is it still mixed up in there?

- Uh, yes, it is.
- Still mixed up. Still mixed up?

Watch.

It's now solved.

Well, that's great.
I don't believe you.

You don't. Okay.
No, I'll prove it. Hands empty.

I want you to watch.
As slowly as possible.

That is one solved Rubik's Cube
and one empty bag.

Thank you.

Now, here's the thing.
As a kid,

I used to actually go
to these speed-solving competitions,

and I would sit there and I would
always race, but I could never win,

so I had to cheat.

Is that still mixed up on all those sides?

Perfect. Now, if I turn it one time,
it's still gonna be mixed up.

The cheating move happens the moment
you toss it in the air like that.

Completely solved.

Thank you.

Yeah, I got so good at cheating,
I'm actually gonna do that same move,

but twice as hard.
I'm gonna do it one-handed.

I'm gonna toss it behind my back.

When I catch it, you're gonna see
every single color on its original side.

Watch close.

One-handed.

Behind the back.
Completely solved.

Now, here's the thing
with the Rubik's Cube.

The more you play with it,
the better and better you get with it.

So, I actually got down
to a millisecond while cheating.

So I'm gonna show you
the millisecond version.

I want you to watch all those sides.

If you actually blink,
you're gonna miss it.

Now, to be honest...

This is me solving
the cube over and over again.

I said I was gonna do it
in Teller's hand, and I am.

Hold it in your hands for me, please.

Cover it up right there. Watch.

We'll try to get it to work.

Like that. It should be solved.

See, I didn't say what the solution
was this time.

See, the solution

was to get these two Rubik's Cubes

to match completely perfectly.

Now, one side is pretty good.
Better than one side,

would be side number two,

side number three, side number four,

five, and all six sides
a completely perfect match.

Thank you, my friends.

Steven Brundage, ladies and gentlemen.

How awesome was that?

Gentlemen, once again,
you can deliberate over there.

No.

- You want to stay up here?
- Yeah.

Okay.

Doesn't take long to say
"You fooled us," does it?

Wow! That's it?
As simple as that?

Oh, no.

Teller, would you like to do the honors?

Steven Brundage, ladies and gentlemen.

He fooled 'em! Did an awesome job.

Now, after a night of figuring out
how other tricks work,

it's time to see them do one of their own.

Here now to perform one of their
own incredible, world-famous illusions,

those twin titans of trickery.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen,

it's Penn and Teller!

Thank you, Jonathan.
Thank you, Jonathan.

Now, before we start the trick proper,
this is important.

Would you all right now,
please, take out your cell phones

and turn them on?

And turn your ringers up full.

We want you all loud and connected.

We're gonna choose
one of you as a cell phone,

and invite you to our stage
and video our first trick

from an angle that will show you
how that trick is done.

Now, Teller's vetting people.

Because you need to have someone
who has video capabilities on their phone

and knows how to use
those video capabilities.

Teller's found someone
who knows how to use his cell phone.

Right up here, please.

And what is your name, my newest friend?

- Jay.
- Hello, Jay, my name is Penn.

Nice to meet you.
Got your cell phone there?

Have someone in your party that
knows your cell phone number there, Jay?

- I do.
- And who's that, Jay?

- Tammy.
- Tammy. Who's Tammy to you, Jay?

- My wife.
- Tammy, call Jay, would you, please?

Let it keep ringing.
Don't hang up no matter what.

Want y'all to memorize that ring tone.

Gonna hold it to my microphone right here.

Memorize this.

The old kind of bell telephone
ring right there.

And, um, oh, you got a picture.
Very nice picture of you there.

- Hello, Tammy.
- Hi, Penn.

Hey, uh, Tammy?

What are you wearing?

Never mind, never mind, never mind!
Gonna put this in video mode.

Gonna made a little video for you
and we're rolling right there. Here we go.

Stand right where you are, okay, Jay?
Here we go.

Good evening! My name is Penn Jillette.
That's my partner Teller,

and Fool Us and Jonathan Ross
are proud to present Jay!

Yeah, give it for him! Give it up for him!

Oh, look at that.
There is Tammy, right there.

They love their Jay.

And strike a pose!

Now, Jay, we have video of you.

We have video of the audience.
We have video of us.

But as of yet, no video of you onstage
with a famous Las Vegas magician!

We're gonna rectify that right now.

If you don't recognize him, all you got
to do is add a little bit of junk jewelry,

and you should know right away, of course,

that is Criss Angel right there.
Look at that!

You can tell it's Criss.
Ripped off anarchy symbol across the abs.

We have Criss, we have Jay,
and our wonderful Las Vegas audience.

Right there. Right there. Right there.
That's a good shot of you.

Jay, get a shot of you walking.

Right forward, right about to that line.

Stand right forward.

Face forward.
Lights will be focused on you.

Gonna do a sweep pan
right over here, pick up this cup.

The cup is clean and dry on the inside.

Open that up, would you, please, Jay?
I want to get an overhead shot.

- Is that clean and dry in there, Jay?
- Yes, it is.

- We'll put your phone right in there, Jay.
- All right.

Now, Jay, when you're watching
this back, there's not a lot to see.

We're doing high-def video
of the inside of a white cup.

Little bit monotonous.

But the sound is great.

If you want to try this at home,
put your phone in a cup.

The microphone's
at the bottom of the phone,

so the whole cup
becomes this organic reverb unit.

Makes the mid-range really fat,
makes your vocals sound great.

To make it sound a little funkier,
you can put this right on there, Jay.

Somebody's bouncing off
the plucky little phone...

Almost dropped it on you, Jay! Sorry.

We'll just focus right on that phone.

Put all your energy there, Jay.

All those emails, those texts,
those videos, those photos from Tammy.

You know, so much of our lives
are on those phones, aren't they, Jay?

So much of our memories,
our thoughts, our ideas, even our hearts.

We've made them
very powerful magical objects,

and we want the Fool Us audience
to get a lot of magic out of that phone.

So you're gonna put a lot of magic in.
Put the magic in, Jay!

Put the magic in the phone!
Put the magic in the phone, Jay!

Put the magic in the phone!

And mazel tov!

Nice.

You know, Jay,

when I can't find my phone,
I do what everyone does.

- Have somebody I know give it a call.
- Yeah.

And then all my friends,
when you listen for the ring tone,

try to triangulate,

and you'd be amazed the unusual places

we found my phone there, Jay.

Here's what we're gonna do.
No matter where you're seated,

anywhere in the auditorium,

listen for Jay's ringtone from Tammy.

The old bell telephone regular ring there.

When you hear it,
no matter where you're seated, right away,

point to where it sounds
to you like it's coming from.

Tammy, call your husband.

Call right now.
Everybody listen, everybody point.

I hear it, I hear it! Just point to it!

I hear it.
Everybody point to it.

It's coming from
that very well-lit woman, right there,

pointing behind her in the blue.

You have Jay's phone on you?

- No.
- Do me a favor.

Spread your legs as wide as you can,

and reach all the way under your chair.
Reach under your chair.

Ma'am, look under your chair.

First of all, find your a*s,

and reach directly under it.

Pull out anything that's under here.

There's a big box
under one of your chairs, there.

Astonishing how long it took us
to find something that big, isn't it?

Would you hand that
to the row in front of you, please?

Keep moving it until it gets to
someone on the aisle.

Maybe you should stand up,
bring that box up here.

Wonderful, thank you so much.

And hand that to Jay, would you, please?

Oh, thank you so much.

And, Jay, what does it say
on that box there?

It says food and wine.

Is that box sealed shut all the way around
with a piece of tape? Check it out.

- Yeah.
- Is it sealed?

Peel that tape off, would you please, Jay?

When you get
all the tape off the box, Jay,

lift the top off the box and tell us
what's inside that sealed box, Jay!

- Fish.
- A fish!

- Nice!
- It's a dead fish packed in ice.

Bring your nose over here, Jay.
I need your nose.

- Okay.
- Bring your nose over here.

And, Jay, take a whiff on us,
would you please, Jay?

Take a whiff on us.

Make sure that it's indeed a real fish.

- Is that a real fish, Jay?
- Yeah, that's... That's real. Yeah.

Jay, take the microphone right there.
Hold that microphone

right above the fish's gills.
Hold it right there.

Hold it still. Tammy!
Call Jay, would you, please?

Hear a few things.

Hear that fish's head being cut off?

Hear the guts spilling out of the fish?

But deep inside the bowels of the tilapia,

you're gonna hear what Jay hears,

when Tammy gives him a call.

Is that inside the fish?

- Is it inside the fish, Jay?
- It certainly is.

You should be able to see
a picture of Tammy covered in fish guts.

- I did.
- You see that right there, Jay?

- I do, yeah.
- Answer that as quickly as you can,

would you please, Jay?

- Hi, dear.
- Hey, babe.

How are you?

- Is that Tammy, Jay?
- That is.

- Is that your phone?
- That is.

- Thank you so much, Jay.
- Thank you so much.

- Watch your step, there. Watch your step.
- Thank you.

That's Jay! That's Tammy!

I'm Penn! This is Teller.

We're Penn & Teller: Fool Us
and Jonathan Ross.

Penn and Teller, ladies and gentlemen!

Wow, that was fabulous!

No idea.
No one could bust that one.

That's our show for tonight. Join us again
next week for more foolers and more fun.

For Penn and Teller, I'm Jonathan Ross.
Good night, everybody.