- The entire life or death
of the heist hanging
In the balance.
- Daddy brennan, please
We need luck points.
- We need more luck.
- I believe in you.
You spiral perfectly through.
- Take one more step,
i'll blow up your vault.
- You turn what was entire
databases of information
Into useless heaps of plastic and metal.
- Clear the vault! Everybody, the vault!
- I'm just gonna haul a*s
and then take off flying.
- The peanut, the roll of quarters
Are in the back of the getaway vehicle.
How nasty do you want it?
- And he throws the b*mb at
Felix's head.
If you blast fire out of the turret.
That didn't blow up the b*mb?
- A colossal expl*si*n.
- Pretty nasty i guess.
You start heading for the trap door vent
And you hear the whirr of a distant fan.
- All right, guys, ready?
- Hell yeah.
This is going to be, this is
gonna be a final episode
That hell yeah.
- We're gonna save time
for our shot in front
Of the bellagio with
the fountains going off.
- With the fountains going up- Exactly.
- I feel so much more relaxed
With it being blue in here.
I cannot tell you how much less stressful.
- 100% - Welcome one and all to your final
And concluding chapter of tiny heist.
I'm your humble dungeon
master brennan lee mulligan.
With me as always are our tiny thieves!
Say hello tiny thieves.
- Hello, tiny thieves.
- Oh boy.
Guys, you have just peeled
out of felix flick's vault
The loading dock at the
edge of his compound
With not only the roll of quarters,
Which was your target in this
heist, but as a little cherry
On top, you've got the peanut
that you only discovered
Mid heist and minetta manning the ballista
On top of the getaway
vehicle. You peel out.
But as you hit the air
vent heading for the door,
The fan kicks in.
- Can we use ballistics on the fan?
Just blow it up.
Here's the situations in which you
find yourself and who's piloting?
I think agnes was hitting
the gas right now, right?
- As you hit the gas, i'm going
to describe your situation.
This fan is like sucking
air from the vents.
Like it's dragging the truck back
From the direction you're trying to go in.
You can absolutely try to fire on the fan.
It will require you
surrendering to the direction
The fan wants you to blow in
to get within range to hit it.
Cause right now it is like
human distances away down
The vent, which to your
range is like astronomical,
Like football fields away.
- It's sucking us out the fan.
- Towards the fan.
- Bringing us in.
- Where it will grind us, or?
- It will either grind you or if it doesn't
you'll just drop down
That shaft with the highway in
it with a little switch back.
- Also probably it'll not be great
That would ultimately not be great.
The only thing i would describe to you
As you remember there is a side passage
From here where the current of the wind
Is a little bit less.
It's the little side panel that goes off
Into dylan's room.
If you remember.
That's the one that bean
peeled off to look at.
You guys are ahead of it right now
And the wind is trying to
suck you in the direction
Of the fan.
But in that direction there is
That turnoff to go to dylan's room.
Okay he, and again, we
got speed chasing us.
Is he in the vent?
Speed is not in the vent.
And in fact, the door slammed shut because
The fan hits - So speed,
doesn't even clear out
After you clear the door.
Car-Go has cleared the
door and was actually kind
Of the first out.
Car-Go was like leading the getaway car
By a little bit.
- Oh my god - Car-Go's in front of us.
Yeah.
- Oh.
- He's a car, he drives super fast.
- Well, so then i'm heading towards
Dylan's room and like flash my brights.
- Yeah,
- Like, this way.
- So you're kind of like
fish tailing in the wind
And just kind of managed to
skirt into the offs sh**t.
You immediately get in
there and feel the force
Of the wind lessen.
It's still pretty terrific,
but it's not going
To knock you off your feet or your wheels.
Can i try to jump to him
as he swerves in front
Of our car to get into the— oh, go
ahead give me an acrobatics check.
Okay.
I still have his dart, so i'd like to like
- Ow!
- To plunge it like, and stick.
- Oh my god, what?
- Well, it's a suction cup dart, so
I think to hold onto
while i'm on top of it.
And i assume you see him
coming to roll with advantage.
Thank god for that.
That's a two.
Nat 20.
- Ooh baby.
You suction into car-Go
and i'm going to say
You grab this, you also
see some like loose a spool
Of dental floss in the side of the car.
If you want to like get
alight with a nat 20,
You can even grab a
lifeline back to the getaway
Vehicle on your way.
- I actually have a spool of dental floss
Is one of my things.
I can just leave that behind.
Someone hold this! Ahhh!
- Blam!
You suction onto car-Go.
Get to the kid - Through the vent.
- Get to that.
Yeah.
So i'm pulling
- There's guards also!
- You pull for the vent,
you two scoot in there.
For the getaway car you can definitely,
Agnes, you can like maneuver,
this is a much bigger
Chunkier vehicle.
You can hit to that
safer side area as well.
- I think we're gonna
just follow everybody.
- Agnes peel the cigarette from your lip.
- Driving a giant truck.
- You smoking again?
- How do you take yeah,
take it a little puff
And then head over.
Cool, you guys head to the
side area of dylan's vent.
It is creepy in these giant vents.
You look out, this is not the one,
There's rigged with expl*sives.
So this one is screwed in
Tight, and the screws are on
the other side of the vent
Unable for you guys to get
out and f*ck with them.
- Can i... Blow it up?
- This is a human structure.
You do not have an amount
of expl*sives on your person
That would enable you to-
- Excuse me?
- There's no fan is there, but
there's not a fan here, right?
This is just a vent.
The fans are just, the original fan
Is still trying to suck us back,
But it's a weaker current
in this like side—
It's a weaker current in this offshoot.
- Do the quarters fit through it?
Quarters do not fit through it,
well, not only the quarters
Not fit through it, the way this fan
Is positioned right here.
The way the vent is positioned
right here is - You guys
Are... To describe the
fullness of the scene.
You guys are safe from
the wind right here.
- Okay.
- The fan is blowing right
now out in that main channel.
You can't get out through this vent,
But nothing else can get
on the hallway right now.
You, you cannot be pursued while they're,
In other words, they're using a weapon
On you to try to like flush you
And maybe you'll all die.
Anyone in your make a scheming
Or an insight check that wants to
- 22.
- 22?
- 7, yeah.
- They're probably going to keep this thing,
This bad boy on for a little while,
Hoping that it kills you
guys and they can't get out
And find out until they turn it off.
They can't get out through the vent.
So they're on total lockdown right now
And i can't use, the screws are all on the outside?
- The screws are all on the outside.
I have an idea.
- One last thing are
The slats in the vent, can
our bodies get through?
Your bodies cannot get through.
- I think, here's my suggestion.
Pitch to the group.
See how we feel.
We all pile out of that getaway vehicle.
Pop it in neutral, let it
get sucked into the vent.
They're gonna think that
they got us and we're dead
Or maybe it even stops the
fan when it hits it, right.
And then whoever, whoever's
slowest pile in old car-Go
And we head for the vent.
- The original vent.
- Yeah, is car-Go going to
be a haul - Handle all that
And quarters?
- Car-Go would not be able
To handle all that and the quarters.
What i will say is this you guys
Are in safety right now.
It is possible for you to, it's, it's not,
This is like a spooky situation you're in,
But also you're not actually in danger.
Like if you're not in danger right now.
So there's the option that would be,
That maybe seems like it
wouldn't be available,
Cause it's too spooky
is actually just to wait
Out the fan, the vent,
they got to turn it out
To even be, they have to turn off
To even be able to leave.
And you guys can g*n it for
the vent that's actually
Rigged to blow.
- And you won't.
Okay and you won't let us
blow up this human vent.
Can i use mage hand to
screw off the screws?
- You don't have line of sight to them.
- They're outside the vent.
- How are they currently operating the fans?
- Yeah, how come we can use an expl*sive
to blow up the other one,
But we can't on this one?
- You guys have any more questions
About my setting that you'd
like me go into for you guys?
How about this. You can't get out this way.
There you go.
- I think we should wait, wait
out the fan.
- We wait it out.
- Yeah, that's, i wasn't challenging that.
I'm saying like who is
like is there any way
Of us getting to the controls.
- We talked about this yesterday,
So it's probably something
that they have wired
Into the like outside.
- The a/c unit.
- That's right, 'cause they have
controls down at the, down at them, okay.
- He's probably radio'd down to the check points.
- Yeah. Okay.
- All right.
- So the fan is operating right now.
But you guys are basically
in this weird limbo
Where you have to wait for them to turn
That off to be able to get out.
You just wait.
- Yeah, don't worry.
So far everything is going
exactly according to plan.
- We're screaming this over the wind.
Can we take, can we take a short rest
As we chill in this wind tunnel?
- Yeah, you guys can take a short rest
As you're in this wind tunnel.
- Nice.
- Could could boomer do his act
To kind of keep everybody entertained?
- We don't want that.
- As you guys are here,
You see minetta comes down
from the tower, rushes over
To you, car-Go, and wraps
her arms around you.
She looks out because i
thought you were dead.
- I thought i was dead.
- Who are all you guys?
- Oh, this, yeah.
Everybody - Minetta.
Minetta... Everybody.
- We're the the burg... Burglar bust-
- No, we're not.
- Burglar busters.
- Burglar boys.
- Burglar busters.
- We're really not, that's not, that's nothing.
- We could be the burgermeisters.
- We're nothing.
- There's a little "burg" in that.
- Oh yeah.
- Who robs the robbers? Us.
- You take a huge bite of peanut.
- Oh, i'm hungry too
And i take a bite.
- This is brain food.
You guys are taking a
huge bite to this peanut.
You see that minetta looks
over at the peanut and goes...
You got the peanut.
- I did.
It's not my, i'm a more of a
pistachio man, but...
- It's stale.
- You see that she just goes, yeah.
Well, felix had it for a long time.
She looks over at you and says, "car-Go..."
I would have told you, but he told me
That if word got out, he'd k*ll the kid.
- No, i, listen.
There's nothing i wouldn't do for dylan.
I understand.
- Okay.
- Anybody else wonder
what the delivery system
Was supposed to be?
Is he going to have a big rubber band
And sh**t it into dylan's mouth?
- I mean, they got a vent right there,
just wait until he's sleeping
And - Boop! - Drop it off in his mouth.
- Put it in his food, yeah.
- Drop it in his mouth, okay.
- You said that you actually
look out and you guys see
Little twinkling lights and kind
of a starry mobile out
In dylan's room and you look out
And you see a little dylan
sleeping out there completely
Soft asleep in the middle
of the night in his bed.
Minetta puts a hand on your back.
As you guys look out.
Rick, you look out and
see this kid sleeping
In his bed as well in
a starry, little room,
A child bedroom full of toys,
Which you have not seen in some time.
- Look at that little b*stard.
- He's ugly.
- I think, i think car-Go gets,
Chuckles a little bit when he calls him
A little b*stard.
- He's giant.
- That's my, that's my child that's dylan.
You got to stop saying that, man.
When you frame it in a
possessive like that it brings up
All kinds of reproductive questions. Okay.
- That is, that is the child. That is dylan.
- I like your skirt.
- Thank you.
I appreciate it.
I'm made of metal, but the skirt's
fabric so that's kind of cool.
- I touch it.
- She says, oh, i love
your gear, your gadgets.
- Oh, this is so rad.
- We kept a lot of those expl*sives, too.
- I can tell, you seem
Like a violent person.
- I got a taste. I got a taste for it.
- Oh no.
- And i think i like it. I wanted to blow up
that little harmless guy.
- She really wanted to k*ll chuck.
- Oh, he was totally harmless.
Okay, all right.
You see that she looks around and says
Well, all right this is, you've
pulled off the impossible.
I mean, you're all dead, felix
Will hunt you to the ends of the earth.
But dylan's alive.
- Yeah, i'm—
- We're eating the peanut.
- Yeah.
- I'll take another big bite.
- Yeah.
- I'm gonna disagree
with you on two things.
One, we're not done.
We still have to get out of
here and we've all got things
We want to use those quarters for.
And two, felix is the one
that's going to be hunted.
- She smiles, she looks out,
She says, anything for the kid.
You, looking down, rick, at
the little kid in the room.
You hear in the sort
of echoing of the vent,
You hear a voice calling out
From the main channel with the wind.
Ah, it is cold in this vent and dark.
From the shadows beyond
only rick can hear a voice
Say, you see the little
b*stard as you call him,
Sleeping in his bed.
Eh, rick diggins?
- Yes, pierre, he sleeps.
He dreams of, i don't know,
what do boys dream of? Farts?
The pup squad.
I do not care.
- Ah, rick.
I believe you when you say you do not care
You have made your heart as
cold and plastic as your body.
- Which would track.
- You see, he says
- It would be weird if you had a flesh heart.
- Yeah, you have no heart.
- My fate, as well
You know, was to be sucked
into a plastic tube
At the wash and go down
the street on maple avenue.
- I'm, i'm sorry.
I never got the chance to say i'm sorry.
It was nothing i could do.
I tried to scream i could not.
- Words, rick diggins,
are no apology. Actions
And the deeds of our life
Are how we say, what we mean
My fate was cold and oblivion.
I did not choose it.
It was chosen for me.
You have chosen the same for yourself.
I can imagine no graver
insult to my memory.
The vacuum tube is not waiting for you,
Rick diggins. Do not make it for yourself.
- Breezy in here.
- Chilly.
- Little chilly.
- And really european.
- Are you okay?
- Yeah, i was thinking of pierre.
He was, when i was stuck under
the seat, my only companion
Was a erstwhile french fry named pierre.
He was all i had.
- Yum.
- Yes, well.
He was all i had for years
until he was sucked up
Into a vacuum tube.
I know, i know.
- He's not all you have now.
- Yeah, i have an addiction to fairy dust,
that is true.
And a dinosaur costume.
- I meant us.
- A dinosaur costume. Well, that's true.
- And maybe a home.
- Yeah.
Well i live on the street.
I'm trying to think of,
i like, i like this,
I liked the idea that, that
rick would want to be reunited
With the other toys because
i think that makes sense.
I just don't know a meaningful
way of making that happen.
I don't think rick needs to
make anything happen right now.
I think you had that vision with pierre
And i think that rick
is, that's a lot for rick
To chew on in the dark. In the quiet calm
- Okay, okay.
That happens here ti,
you and bean are looking
At each other for the first
time after the getaway
Where you both learned the truth
About what's happened to your communities
About what felix did to you.
- That was no accident.
- Yeah, it sure seems that way.
- Yeah, that the mini fridge
broke at the teen center
And we stopped being able to get food.
- Yeah i don't like the fact
that i'm still a little blurry
On the details.
He has some sort of control
over the big bearded man
Who came and scooped my home up
And turned it into fertilizer.
- Yeah.
- Santa?
- I'm gonna k*ll him.
- Yeah, no, that's for sure.
It's not typically what i -
Do you know master buttons?
- The old—
- Yeah, we can't tell her if we
end up k*lling this guy
Because that would actually
get me in a spot of trouble.
- Okay.
I believe car-Go figured
out the mystery of tip
And tap, by the way, that i don't know
That the two moochers in
the party have figured out.
And you overhear them
talking about this.
- Bean, i don't know if this will help or hurt
Or mean anything, but i suspect the attack
On your home wasn't a coincidence.
It might've been motivated.
You were telling me that
master button's knew snow pea
And knew rain drop and
they had two grandsons.
The grandsons are marty and felix.
- What?
- Marty and felix are from the heap.
- Yeah, i thought we all were on that page,
Once we found out.
- Oh, okay, cool.
Yeah, i mean, because no one had said it.
- I'm just saying, it's two,
Two siblings and then they disappeared,
but they went in and—
- Yeah, it's just no one had said it explicitly.
- And one of the had k*lled the guy that we know—
- It's just that you didn't make that connection,
- You hadn't said it.
- No, nobody had said it.
- When he told you that story.
- Hey, you know it's really easy
In hindsight to say everybody knew it,
But like nobody else said it.
- Woah, now wait.
They were who?
- See, alright. Alright, boomer.
- Oh damn.
- Yeah.
- There's people who get
to live inside the house
And there's people who have
to live outside the house
And it's the first group who makes sure
That the second group stays where they are
And they call themselves something else.
But we're all just moochers.
- The same, yeah.
- We're all just bitty folk.
- We're just bitty folk, yeah.
- It's just they call us something different
So they can keep us
locked out of the house.
It sounds to me like felix is the one
Sort of a holding that, that,
that title in place. So—
- Yeah, it seems like he's been
making moves for longer
Than we possibly could have imagined.
He's wanted to be a big
folk for some time now.
It seems like, what
With his access to a bmail account,
Which is the license free
version of, it's booble, man.
- Oh man, don't go on booble.
- Don't, yeah.
It's not a good search
engine unless you're looking
For one very specific thing.
In which case it's kind of the search engine
In town, i imagine.
- If you're looking for bubbles.
- Yeah.
I don't really have a
point to this speech except
To say he's gonna, he's
going to go in the fan.
- Yeah here's the, i think we can all
agree at this point, knowing,
Knowing what we know now and what his plan was,
Felix can't live, whether
it's what he's done
To us before or what he will do given
The chance again, this is his last night.
- This is turned into a m*rder pact,
Which we maybe didn't all sign on for.
- Oh, i'm gonna k*ll him.
- You hear over your radio,
Boomer, over your surveillance, a voice
Come on and go,
Listen up, bug.
We're going to k*ll this
fan in about 30 seconds.
And i'm going to show you
a little piece of theater
I've been preparing.
It's a great scene.
It's about a talentless,
Hack beetle who dies in the house.
It's squashed, swept into the trash
And forgotten, i think
you're going to really like it.
- You know, it's ironic.
I was the one guy that was going to stand
Up for you, but f*ck that.
Fine, bring it hawes.
You've been messing with my sh*t.
Her sh*t, her sh*t,
everybody's sh*t for, well,
Six episodes almost. Dude,
Bring it! Do your worst.
We can handle it,
Right? Right? Right? Dinosaur - Dinosaur man?
- Yeah.
- With that, you hear a
click on the other end
As they turn off your walkie,
turn off your bad guys
Surveillance. Agnes, you
are sitting in the front seat.
Minetta comes over, says,
sorry for the stinkeye earlier.
I love your whole deal.
- Do not even get started.
I love your whole deal
and the sh*t that you had
To put up with.
- Hey, you know what?
If you ride it out every once in awhile,
The people you care about
come through in the clutch.
Glad i was able to stall it long enough.
- In the words of my good
friend bean, hell yeah.
- Hell yeah.
- The fan—
- We don't even know what
you're talking about, we just go, hell yeah.
- The fan dies down.
- I give you all a bang snap.
- I'm going to say that you're,
That you had two, one
of them was in the vent
Waiting to blow and
that the other one used
To blow up all the clicko men.
- So i don't have— damn.
- You don't have any. The wind dies.
The fan subsides.
The tunnel is now open again.
- Let's go. Let's go, go, go, go.
- You hit, vroom.
You take your last—
- Where does this tunnel go?
- To max's room, which is the one that you found
That sort of alternative escape
path to get out of the house.
You take off, you hit,
you detonate the bang snap,
The car hits the vent,
as the car hits the vent
You see the ledge open up.
Speed, and a fleet of vehicles
With birds, mice, stewards
and felix flick - A mad max
Convoy of fairy dust
Animated vehicles peals after you.
You see felix in a
throne in the back of one
Of the vehicles says, you get me that nut.
And get me those quarters.
- He sits there.
- How far down the peanut are we?
How much of it have we eaten?
- Yeah, i crack it in half.
- How much have we eaten of this peanut?
- Eat the quarters!
- I think you've eaten, this thing is like
two thanksgiving turkeys and—
- We're hungry.
- We're hungry, and there's two of us.
- I think you're a full
third of the way through.
- Hell yeah.
- I know what
My first four actions are going to be.
- Okay, so car-Go is still separate.
- Car-Go can be separate, or you can be—
- Yes, i would like to be separate.
And is there any way, can i
do a perception check to see
- If i can recognize any
of the cars as trans - Car-Mo-Bots?
- Don't i, i think, would boomer
have that knowledge?
I mean he's the one that's
the inside guy and knows.
- The only car-Mo-Bot that's
up in the vault - Charger
Was a rat, but he was not close enough.
- So the vehicles are all just cars.
- Vehicles are all just cars.
They're not sentient.
They're animated by fairy
dust or they're working,
But they're not a—
- Can i say, i just hate speed.
I hate him so much.
He's gunning for you.
You embarrassed and give
him a scar over his eyes.
He's coming.
You see one scratched headlight
in the front of that car.
You guys leap from the open vent.
Hit the ficus, rail off,
hit the base of the bed.
You see in the bed is a sleeping max.
Max the teenager
Is asleep in the
bed as you hit the foot
Of it, this is the closest to a human
And you've been since
you were talking to dylan
In the very first episode.
- Oh, he's huge!
- I am gonna need everyone,
surprise, roll initiative.
- f*ck, we just—
- But the room's blue!
No!
- What?
- Finally, a good initiative.
- Oh! I got a poopy one.
- 17 plus dex, right? 19
- Cool.
- I also got a 19.
I got a nat one plus four is five.
- One minus one, zero.
- Wow. Awesome guys.
We're going to do this for
the first time in dimension
20 history, mid episode
combat, combat board switch.
- Holy sh*t.
- Shazam! You guys hit the bed.
This is max's filthy teenage bed.
You hit the back of his
guitar. As you hit it,
We have agnes, boomer
digginsaurus rick, ti,
And minetta in the getaway vehicle.
The roll of quarters strapped in
And the peanut in the back.
And we have bean sort of
three point crouch staff
In hand on top of car-Go jones.
You are being pursued
by a fleet of vehicles.
Where do you guys go as we,
as we start the order here,
- If we drive up past here,
Do we have to then switch to another, another set?
- Another part of the boy?
- We might have a couple of these.
- Yo-Kay.
- So are we at his feet right now? Is that the—
- You're like at the foot of the bed
right now, basically yeah.
And the wind - You're headed
towards the open window
Sill at the end of the bed.
- Woah.
- So—
- This is the hard surface, right?
- You see that there's kind of like two roads
That are diverging here.
There's like a, a sort
of high road, low road.
- And we can't see past it.
- Not at the moment.
- You can make a perception
check to see if you can see
Sort of like loosely
what's up ahead of you.
- I would love to do that.
- I can do that.
- I got a 21.
- I got a 20.
- A 20, 21?
- Okay, one person on each of these crews
Sees these two roads split.
You cannot see every single
obstacle on them necessarily,
But you do see that they
reconverge up ahead.
- Okay.
- Here's my question.
Can i get, can i drive
from here to dylan's room?
- It would be, the distance
That you're talking about.
First of all, you might not be able to get
Out under max's closed door.
And the distance covered
would take ages compared
To getting to the end of the bed.
- I'm sorry, griffin.
- Dammit.
- That was our plan.
- I'm sorry.
- We are going to go get dylan.
- You're going to k*ll dylan.
- No, we were going to get dylan.
- Oh
- Okay.
- We'll start the initiative order with
- Can i grab something from ti real quick?
- Yeah.
- Could i get like a b*mb for me?
Do you have any extra little bombs
Or something or is it to0?
- He said i don't but i believe i do.
- Can i see, i can look at your character
sheet if you'd like.
We can confirm that.
- And lily, didn't ti—
- I just don't know what ti can do.
- Didn't ti put a b*mb on the vehicle?
- Yeah, she blew it, she blew it to get us out.
- We had to blow it to get out.
- Oh, that blew it? Okay.
- That's what opened the vent.
- Can i see your magic item cards?
- That was the heat -
The seat warmer b*mb?
- Actually you know what? I have your magic
Item cards over here. I have my own.
- Okay.
- The seat warmer b*mb?
- Sorry to hold stuff up.
- No.
- It's okay.
- I don't think so. Not the seat warmer b*mb—
- Go ahead and roll a d4 for me lily.
- How do i count it?
- Two.
Whoever's on top.
- Two.
- You have to bang snaps left.
- Okay.
- I give agnes one.
- Do you want to, i don't
want to take stuff.
- No, i give it to you. I don't care.
- You got a bang snap.
- Do you want two? Do you want two?
- I mean i don't have a ton i can do,
So i'll, i'll use all the help i can get.
- I give you both.
- Okay.
- Great.
That's going to be so bean 'n car-Go,
You guys are the first to go.
- Do we see no enemies, like—
- There behind us.
- Oh, they're racing past you guys here.
- I really want to k*ll speed.
- If you guys want to just tell me
which avenue you're taking,
We can move you further along
And place bag guys on the board.
If that's going to inform
your decision-Making.
- Yeah, i think we'll go left because?
- Hell yeah.
- Well—
- You'd rather go right? Because?
- I want to go towards max, his,
His face region.
- His face? Both of these roads
Head in that direction.
- Yeah, you're just a version of—
- I think you're a lighter car,
And you should go on the lighter road
And we're heavy and we
should take the heavier terrain.
- I think that, you know what?
That makes a lot of sense.
- Cool, if that, if that's agreed to?
- Yes.
- You see car-Go, you guys
both look at each other.
Give that thumbs up that you're like,
Robe is whipping behind you in the wind.
This one's like gearing up.
You're tossing bang snaps to people.
Minetta takes the wheel.
You guys nod and split.
As you guys split, you race
Off this way.
Car-Go heads up
this way and here come the bad guys.
- This is going to take a while.
- We should have k*lled them before we left.
- Yeah, you know what?
Can we retcon and say we just k*lled them all?
Is that too late?
- Oh! Yes!
- Oh, sh*t yeah.
I'm glad we didn't leave.
- Yeah.
- Aw, he' got a little face.
- He's got ants helping him?
- We're also going to throw some extra guys.
- Oh good. They weren't threatening enough.
- Oh hoh.
- A rat.
- A rat!
- That's a dirty rat.
- A rat.
- This one's coming after—
- Oh that one's got like a penguin.
- I don't care for that.
- Yeah.
- Who's in there?
- A ramrod's—
- He's a man with a silly hat?
- Thumbtack hat.
- You got tony manchego.
- That's our friend! That's one of the grasshoppers.
- That's not one of the grass coppers.
- Cool.
- Hold on one second.
You guys also got—
- Are you sh1tting me?
- Speed's coming after me, right?
- Oh, of course.
- This is no longer,
I think you need to admit, brennan,
that this is no longer
Dungeons and dragons.
This is your opportunity
to play with cool cars.
On top of a guitar.
- Oh, fully admitted, yes. Good, but yes.
- I will also say, this feels a little vindictive
What you're doing here.
I feel like if we all stayed motionless for 10 minutes,
We would cut back to find brennan like
They've turned the tables on me!
- What the f*ck, is that a hummingbird?
- That's a hummingbird holding a hammer
Made out of a pencil.
- Ohh.
- Hummingbirds are bad in this world?
- I thought they weren't supposed to stay still.
- I thought they were good.
- Awesome.
- Okay now. This is it?
- Oh look, marty's driving.
- Oh marty.
- And speed.
- And i can't just set it
on fire cause it's a boy.
- What?
- Set the boy on fire?
No, this is great.
Set the boy on fire.
- Let me set the boy on fire.
- Oh, i see. Max!
- Oh! Max in the bed.
- Max the boy.
- I had no idea
Where that connected to.
- I just love, so - People are
often so afraid of big moves
And they, they're so timid
When they play d and d
and i love when you ask
Questions that amount to can i set
The entire setting on fire.
- Well, yeah.
- The whole, the whole environment.
The whole campaign setting is—
- That's my personality
In this game.
I said on my character sheet, i leap in
And i want to blow things up.
- Oh, okay.
So we have an advanced
down here at this point.
What i'm also gonna ask
car-Go is as we're like
Racing through here, we're
adding a chase mechanic
To this, which is basically
in addition to whatever
It is that you're doing that
turn you're going to tell
Me whether you are
effectively flooring it,
Cruising or slowing down.
And the reason, the thing that those
are basically going
To do is cruising:
It means you're maintaining speed.
Everything's normal,
You're advancing down the road. Flooring
It means you are trying to outrun
And leave behind the
vehicles pursuing you.
It gives you disadvantage
on any maneuvering things
You try to do as you speed up.
- Uh huh.
- Slowing down means that
things that are going faster
Behind you can catch up to you, but that
They are going to be,
but that you're rolling
With advantage on like saving throws.
- So you get a surprise on them, okay.
- Yep.
- Okay.
- So bean and car-Go, what's up?
- Bean, you go first.
- Can i ready an action?
- Yes you can.
- Do i have to tell you what it is
Or can i keep it a surprise
for dramatic effect?
- Can you, if you write down
the action and what triggers
It in your book right
now and show it to me,
I will allow it.
- Okay can you take 30
seconds and kind of describe,
Cause these cars obviously
have different stuff.
We said that's a ramrod.
I don't know if it's actually a ramrod.
- Yes.
So this one here is a ramrod.
It's got a drill on the front of it.
This one's got forks and
stuff, like wheels shredding
Stuff on the side.
- Yeah.
- This one over here, it
looks like very rudimentary
And it's just like spears
and stuff on the front.
This looks like a boarding party.
The fire truck looks like a boarding party.
And then there's this kind
of wild pope mobile thing
With felix in his throne and
marty is driving it behind him.
- Marty should not be driving.
- Which like, once again.
Production crew, the details.
- The best. The best.
- Yes incredible.
- This is the best production.
I mean, you can't, you can't
top this this is great.
It's just the little thing of
like, if you look inside
The little zipper pull that's like inside
Of the thing, it's just beautiful.
- Incredible.
- Wait can i see?
- Wait a minute so everybody
gets to see but us?
- Uh huh. Oh.
- You'll see.
- Okay.
- Sealed?
- I like drama.
- Beautiful.
- With a kiss!
- Lovely.
All right, great.
So you're readying an action, car-Go
What are you doing?
- I'm going to slow down.
A little bit.
- Cool.
- And trade paint with speed.
- You're going to let speed catch up to—
- And i'm going to try to
push him off the road.
- You want me to move him? Or slow him down.
- Cool. Yeah.
- I'll have, speed
catches up to you—
- Because he's faster than me.
But as you can see, i got
more weight than he does
Because i'm a steel bodied 1970s,
And he is a fiberglass maserati.
This is absolutely an
opposed athletics check.
I'm going to say for our
purposes here, yeah,
For our purposes here
speed is going to get
A plus three to his athletics role.
This is definitely box of doom.
- This is not—
- Because i slowed
down, do i get advantage?
You said on maneuvering
things when i slowed down,
I get advantage.
- Yes.
I absolutely did say that.
Oh, i'm gonna say this, this right now.
If you beat him, you push
him all the way to the edge.
If you beat him by 10 or more,
You push him all the way off edge.
- Kick his a*s, travis.
- Yeah, dude. f*ck that dude.
- k*ll him.
- Am i doing it in there?
- He gets a plus three.
We're doing it in the box.
- Am i rolling in the box of doom?
Or you?
- It's contested.
So he's going to roll
for athletics. His athletics,
And you have to beat, he rolled a four.
- Kick his a*s!
- So he's got a seven.
- That's a nat 20.
- Goodbye speed!
- Bye bye! Bye speed! Later!
- f*ck that dude! f*ck that dude!
- f*ck off!
- Excuse me, i have to mark something
off a list.
- Oh my god!
- Now can we have—
- Travis, it's the first round.
- Can we have just a quick flashback?
Cause i told you why i hate speed so much
And i just, this is the moment, where i just
Want to, i want to tell
everyone why i hate,
We don't even need to flash back.
Why i hate speed so much.
- Did he sexually as*ault minetta?
- You see speed,
You see speed pulls up alongside you,
The headlights glow red,
He pulls up alongside
The station wagon being on top,
As he pulls up alongside of you
He says, give up the ghost car-Go.
Your time's up pal.
- You never appreciated the
Kid's love, speed.
You don't deserve to live.
- We don't live when we are dependent
on some pissant little kid.
You think i give a sh*t
whether that kid gets
A peanut down the throat or not.
I hope that kid dies.
- Hey, he's cool
And he gave me some crackers.
- You see he looks at you and says, oh, as you,
He goes, you know what i never got about you, car-Go.
You were never even dylan's favorite.
Why fight this hard when
the kid doesn't even love you.
- It wasn't about being the favorite, speed.
That's what you never got.
You might've been max's favorite after me.
You might've been dylan's
favorite, but you never loved
Them and you never deserved it.
You see, he looks up and
says, well, you deserve this.
Turn into you, slams into your side.
You look up ahead of you
and as you cross the top
Of this hill, you see max's face.
You see the face of your
old child who is long
Since grown up. You flash back
to a moment long ago when
Dylan was only four
years old and max was 14.
And you see max kneeling down
And he's holding a little car-Go jones
In his hand and you see, he goes,
Now, the cool thing about this car-Mo-Bot
Is that he's a detective
and he's really good
At planning and he's really
good at finding clues.
And i really hope you
have as much fun playing
With him as i did.
He hands him, you snap back. The wheel turns
And speed flies off the highway into
The darkness of the sheets as he goes.
He transforms back into his regular body.
Car-Go jones!
Max shifts in his sleep, folds a knee
And crushes speed underneath the blanket.
- Ooo!
- Nice!
- Yes!
- And so dies speed.
- f*ck you speed.
f*ck that dude.
- Oh there's, there's only five huge cars left.
- Hey listen, i did my cool thing.
Now you all do something.
- It's always just so funny when a main villain bites
It in round one, but that
is f*cking beautiful.
Yeah.
And even slowing down the
main guy who was chasing you
f*cking paid the price for it.
That's going to be bad guys
turn because you're slowing
Down, this guy is gonna move up.
Oop, if i - Do you wanna rest him—
- I'll put it up—
- He's going to take a shot at you,
car-Go.
- He is, or the car?
- The car.
- With the ramrod?
- With the ramrod.
- Okay, actually, he's not.
- Woah!
- I see them approaching and i'm obviously
Going to be partied to whatever this car
Does to us as well.
And i am still just ice cold,
calm, collected, no big deal.
And i have an idea based
on one of the trips
That i took inside the
house on like a resource
Run for the community.
I saw, i saw max and he was doing something
On this huge illuminated screen
That i maybe didn't
understand at the moment.
But after watching him enough times,
I realized that it was a video
game that he was playing.
And the video game was called mario kart,
Or for the purposes of this, a plumber man
- Kario mart?
- Drives a small vehicle with his friends,
65. And when i see that
i slip off my half robe,
Banana peel, half robe,
and i take a look at it
And i throw it into the road in the way
Of the oncoming vehicle.
- So you're just naked?
- They call it, the chiquita move.
- When the car tries to ram us,
I throw my robe to make it
slip off the boy and explode.
- Now the last part is obviously the desired effect.
- Full creative license, right.
- Amazing okay.
I'm going to have you make
a, i'll let you decide.
You can either set the
dc of this as the same dc
As your monk abilities for what
Like, the saving throw they have to make to avoid it—
- Right, right, right.
- Or i will let you roll an
attack roll and use whatever
That attack is as the new dc.
- Well, and the attack
role would be plus any, what would the -
- It would be your dex
plus your proficiency.
- Oh man.
Okay so we're talking about
if i just take my spell
Casting saved modifier,
whatever, it would be 15
Or i could roll the dice and add seven.
So if i roll an eight
or no, this is nothing.
I'm gonna say 15.
I'll just go with my spell thing. 15.
- Go with a solid 15.
Awesome.
Jesus.
Okay, this is another box
of doom roll for sure.
- But, but for you.
- Oh, nothing bad can happen to you.
You're depositing a piece of clothing onto the track.
- It might get a little cold.
- I think there's just sentimental
attachment to this banana -
This banana peel was like, i think i lived
In this banana peel and
it was all that was left
Of my house when it got
scooped up with a big shovel.
- When you first started
wearing it was yellow.
Now it's kinda brown.
- It's definitely past it's due date.
- Big black spots on it.
- They get a plus three
To their saving throw.
So aa 12 or higher means
they don't go off the road.
I'm also gonna say that
it's, i'm going to bump
It up by five, to an, let me see, yeah,
Cause your dc's 15 right?
- Right.
So they need to get to the
15, so they need a 12 or higher.
I'm going to say that they need a 17
Or higher on the die to not
be tremendously slowed down
Either way.
- Okay.
- So whether they go off or
not, they, if they hit it,
They go off.
If they avoid it, they
still trail behind you.
- Okay
- And lose their attack.
- Is there one in which
they fall completely off?
- If they don't get a 12,
they fall completely off.
- Good.
- We're going to roll.
So 18 or higher, they still
get to make the attack.
11 or lower they're off the road.
Anything in between and they
don't get to make the attack,
But stay on the road.
You deposit your robe, the
last vestige of your home,
Your home that was destroyed by the man
At the back of this convoy.
You watch it disappear in the wind
And you can hear the voice of
master buttons say, everything
Good and this world
gets turned to dirt eventually
You gotta learn to let go.
And as you let go, it hits the wheel.
The hummingbird looks at you ready to jump
And the driver, lets go of the wheel
Just at the exact wrong
time. Reaches for it.
Hits the peel, the car fish tails
And flies off the side of the bed.
- Yes!
- Deuces!
- Oh! Daddy!
- I don't want to damage it, i'll do a gentle—
this, yeah, this one just tumbles.
You sh-Hear the bird scream.
Ah dang.
I gave him a wings for hands.
- Ah, what was i thinking at the clinic?
- Wings for hands.
- In retrospect—
- I'm going to have minetta
make a check real quick.
- Uh oh.
- Good, she rolls a natural 15.
- Hey, look out, look out, look out!
- She goes ah!
As this car hits off the lower road
And smashes a car into oblivion.
- I yelled out at the other car.
We went and k*lled two of ours
So our road's looking real nice.
- In two! Two out of two!
- I high - I slap
Your, like, radio antenna.
- I'm like, i'm not sure
What's your hand right now, partner!
- That's my p*nis!
- Oh h* h*.
- No, no, no.
That's just a joke.
I don't have a p*nis, i'm a robot.
- What a round from
car-Go and bean. This car
Is going to catch up here.
They speed up.
You see that both of these
were basically like speeding
Up to catch and minetta
is, is sort of hedging
Her bets and just cruising right now.
- She doesn't want to go
too fast or too slow.
- That car is going to make an attack.
- What about felix's vehicle?
- What is that, a catipult spoon?
- Oh, yeah.
- That's hot as hell.
- I mean, is it going to go left
Or is it going to go right?
- Oh, this one here goes here.
Felix is going to follow
you guys on the lower road.
- Uh oh.
- Oh my god.
- Because we have the quarters.
Oh, you at the quarters?
- The quarters and the peanut, yeah.
This one is going to
launch a catapult at car-Go.
Car-Go's armor class is a 14.
- 14.
- Okay. Car-Go, you take
11 points of damage.
- What kind of damage?
- Bashing damage.
- Is this aimed at both
of us or just at car-Go
Would you say?
- I would say this one is aimed at car-Go.
This one is aimed at car-Go,
but yet this huge bead
Smashes into the back of your vehicle.
It hits. Over here,
These guys keep going.
One of them is going to make an
attack on your vehicle.
That is a miss.
As it tries to ram into the back, you can feel
The wheels going up.
This one's going to make an
attack to attempt to extend.
This one succeeds, the ladder extends.
- Oh sh*t.
- And you see that two ants jump off
- Holy sh*t there's so many ants.
- Into the vehicle there. They jump off.
They're going to take some,
one of them takes a swing at
Digginsauris, misses. One takes a
swing at boomer, hits boomer
For three points of damage.
What, what's the hp for
boomer and car-Go right now?
- I'm at 16.
- 16, okay.
- Boomer is at, right now
he's at 49. He went from 52 to 49.
- He's a big old beetle!
- You see this ant jumps
up and goes like,
Looks like it's curtains for you, pal.
And just sort of hits your carapace.
And boomer, that's your turn.
- Oh god.
- Okay i would like
boomer to launch himself.
The thing is attached, right?
- Yeah.
Can i clarify something
before he does this?
Are we treating each
of these cars as a unit
Or is it like, are each
of these individual
People inside the car?
The humanoids inside the car a, their own thing?
- Each are their individual entities.
So in other words, the
characters that you can see
Played by miniatures.
They have hit points and armor classes.
The vehicles also have hit
points and armor classes.
- Okay. Got it. Got it.
- Secret tip though, if you
could blow up the vehicle,
The people inside just die.
- They die.
- It's awesome.
- Listen, i don't want to tell you all
how to do your jobs,
But you can watch a master class
Over here on the left lane.
- Okay i think boomer is going
to deal with the two ants
That are, that are on the truck,
That have boarded the truck.
- Awesome.
- You know, he's got four arms.
No, he's got four arms.
So i think he could
successfully deal with him.
He does have great weapon fighting.
- Great.
If you want to take an attack, i mean,
Let's have boomer go to work,
But what i'm trying to figure out, okay.
Yeah. Okay. So i'm going
to attack, what do i roll?
- D20.
- And you add seven.
- 10 plus seven, 17.
- You hit this ant, go ahead and roll damage.
- This is going to be overkill a little bit, i bet.
- I'm just an ant!
- Eight, 2d6. A three and a four.
- Seven plus five is 12.
This ant jabs at you with
one of his little hands.
What does boomer say to
him after he jabs at him?
- Sorry.
- Boom! You just crack this ant's head open.
He flies off the vehicle and f*cking disappears.
The remaining ant is looking
not to psyched about his odds.
Great, awesome.
- Do it, dad. Do it.
- And then using his action surge,
- Ooo.
- To continue along the boarding ladder,
- Sweet!
- To take out mouseketeer.
- Excellent.
- Oh my god.
- Ah, awesome so you're
gonna use your movement.
- I'm just going to lower my
horn and run right at him.
- Oh my god.
- What are your like special,
Do you have anything that's like charge or?
- I have... Things.
- Sick, bro. Sick, bro.
- Incredible. You go just gunning.
These ants are going to get
attacks of opportunity on you.
You might not care about that.
But they're gonna take some swings
On you as you run past them.
- I'm okay with that.
- Awesome i'm gonna roll here.
- Because rocky kept getting back up.
- Hell yeah. Wait, i just want to make sure he didn't fall.
- Do you mean creed? Who's rocky?
- Oh, yeah.
- I think i'm making it worse.
- Just let him take a nap.
- Errrr.
- Ah, there we go. Good job.
- He body surfs on the ants.
We can lift 50 times our own weight!
- Squish, squish, squish, squish.
- All of these ants take swipes at you.
Only one of them hits you
for five points of damage.
You just thunder past them.
They all go, no, no, no.
As you swing past, i'll
say that as you're charging
In the middle of your action surge,
And this is so unexpected.
Roll your attack against
this mouse with advantage.
- 13. What do i add to it?
- Plus seven.
- 20.
- Roll again. Roll again,
You got advantage.
- Okay.
- You never know.
- 11.
- Oh, 11. 20.
- Oh, awesome.
That 20, i'll also say just
because, i'm not saying
This again, i never want to
tell you guys what to do,
But i just wanna remind you
guys about the rules of d
And d cause they're very dense.
You could absolutely your dealer's choice
Between dealing damage to this mouse.
I will also say that
there is a thing in 5e
Which you take as an attack action,
Which is just a shove action,
Which moves someone five feet
in a direction of your choice.
Which in this battle is extreme. Normally—
- May be even better than hitting them.
- Well, they do get to save
If they're going over an edge, right?
Like there is a chance for—
- I don't believe so.
- Oh, okay.
- Not once, if the attack is successful
The attack is successful.
- That was a 4e thing, i think.
- 4e i think there's a save for it.
In this one, there is no save.
- What about in third e?
- Oh my.
- Would, i mean, would knocking him off the
Vehicle not be just as effective?
- Well, yeah, that's what i'm saying. It would be—
- Yeah! Let's—
- Especially because that's immediatly behind.
- Yeah. And that would that leave boomer a chance
To do anything else?
No, that was it.
So that would be replacing your attacks.
You did want attack, charge, action,
Action surge for your second attack on this guy.
- Okay.
- With an action surge don't you get a full round again?
He could get, move again.
- No you just get,
You just get an action.
Action surge is just an action.
Awesome, this guy rolls.
He's got to beat a 20.
On a natural eight our
friend does not beat a 20.
Boomer you thunder across the ladder.
Who, who and body check this mouse.
He goes, ah, jeepers creepers.
- Oh he seems nice.
- Pops off the back of this thing. Make a little—
- I k*ll one guy and you sympathize
with him.
- I mean he just said jeepers creepers.
It was cute.
It was non threatening.
- You saw, he rolled a nat one. He
pops off and disappears under
The wheels of felix's vehicle.
- Oh. Awesome.
- Do you have time to run back?
- No, he does not have time to run back.
- Okay.
- I will say this boomer,
You are now on a driverless vehicle.
You can take over that vehicle.
- Or you could get the f*ck off.
- Boom! Hit the mouse.
Yeah, so huge clobbering
time round for boomer.
It's a driverless vehicle.
It is covered in ants.
- I don't think, i don't think they can beat him.
Who was driving it?
- The mouse.
- Okay.
- The mouse is driving it.
I don't think the ants beat you, i think they'll f*ck off.
- Covered in ants!
- It can still be annoying.
- Tell me about it.
- Hey, is that because i'm riding on you?
- That's boomer. Agnes that's you.
- No, no, no, just because like ants, at a picnic.
- Can agnes, would a sleep if she kind of
cast it on the driver of this car work?
- You can hit the area
over here to just catch
These two stewards in it if you like.
- You can also catch the ants, too, right?
- Yeah i want to try to make them
Sleep so that they'll like the lose
lose control of the vehicle. Yeah.
- Lose control of the vehicle.
Awesome, very cool.
There's two of them there.
One of them is driving,
one of them is not.
If you catch them both,
it will be like a random
Chance kind of which
one is affected by it.
Unless you can roll enough hit points
To put them both to sleep.
I think i want to direct
it mainly at the driver.
Unfortunately, because of
the way this has worked
Out, the like area of
effect, you'd be hitting
Some of the people on
the back of your vehicle
To just catch this person.
- Oh, people are in the way.
- Because there's, this person's not jutting out
To the side at all
effectively, but it's possible
For you to roll enough hit points
To put them both to sleep.
- Yeah i'll try it.
- Go ahead.
- And if you're doing it
as far as a first level
Spell roll, 5d8 you roll 7d8
If you do it as a second level spell.
- I'll do it as a second level spell.
- Let's, let's go ahead and
give jess some d8s.
- Yeah, this seems pretty clutch, right?
- This seems pretty—
- Clutch, get it? It's a race.
- Okay. This ones an eight, an eight.
- Eight. This ones an eight, right?
- One, two, three, four, five, six
- Dum, dum, dum.
- And then this guy's an eight too, right? Okay.
- And this is an eight, right?
- I think i only need seven.
- It's going to be a lot.
- Oh there's some high
f*cking numbers in that one, huh?
- Whoo! So this is 10, eight.
So it's 18 plus four, 22. Plus five, is 29.
- 22. 29.
- Oo doctor. And i believe, do they
get a saving throw?
I don't think i do.
- No, i think if it beat the—
- This roll is the, decision maker.
- Is the roll. Yeah.
How many hit points did you do?
- 29.
- 29,
Did i get 'em?
- Each of these guys has 12 hit points.
- Oh, jeez.
- You watch, agnes, what does
agnes do to cast this spell
- Go to sleep!
- As she like, what,
Like, how does it, what
does it look when she's,
Cause we haven't seen her, i
think cast like big battle,
Flashy magic before.
- Oh baby, well she takes a drag
Of her cigarette and then
she puts it behind her ear
And she opens up her fanny pack and grabs
Her sleeping dust and gives is a nice
couple coughs. And then coughs onto these dudes.
- This f*cking dust! Both of these guys
hit the f*cking deck.
- Is the car is still going?
- The car is extremely still going.
I'm going to roll basically
a straight bottom to top luck check—
- Wait let me make sure everyone gets their dice back.
- For this vehicle.
- I think these are for you.
- So this is not elevated necessarily, right?
This road is the low road.
This road's the high road.
- Exactly. But the edge of the bed
Is like right over here.
- Oh, okay. Okay.
- Yeah, i'm going to roll for them.
They, these guys want a high number.
They're both f*cking
asleep no matter what.
- Oh that one's mine.
- Okay, they got a 13.
You watchthem both hit the deck.
The one who goes to sleep
keeps a foot on the gas
And the car just keep charging
forward down the road.
- Woo! Crazy.
- With two the two sleeping drivers, insane.
- And then with my bonus
action, i'll just protect
I'll do a bardic inspiration
for who's closest.
I'll give it to rick.
- Awesome, rick gets
that bardic inspiration.
Hell yeah.
- I got a lot of big things that i can do,
So i'm pretty excited about.
- Minetta continues to drive.
Ti, that's going to be you.
- Is this force ballista still in play
Or is it off?
- Yeah, i believe so.
- So this car is still going at us.
- This car is still attached but driverless.
This car is still going but driverless.
That one still has tony
and the grasshopper
And it's doing fine.
- I cannot believe how well
you guys did this round.
- This is, this is chaos.
- Is there a turn where that car
Is going to get to us soon or
is it still quite far away?
- Are you talking about this guy?
- Felix's.
- That guy? Felix could catch up,
But right now the road's blocked
Ahead of him.
- Okay.
How long does the defender
turret last on us?
If i make one?
- I think it lasts for a while.
I think it lasts for a
minute, which is going
To be like the whole battle pretty much.
- Okay, great.
Then i'm going to do a defender turret
And use a spell slot.
- I was all stressed out because
we didn't have a cleric,
But this is very good and helpful.
- We're doing fine.
- Yeah.
- Oh this is great.
- Clerics are not that good.
- I do have cure wounds as well. If we need it.
- Are you, you're summoning a defender turret?
- Yeah.
- Cool, this disappears and we're
going to, bye little turret.
You see that this little
sonic turret appears
And it starts like
creating waves of music to
Like buffet projectiles
and dampen force.
You—
- I think that's a good call.
Cause i think that driverless car is going
To hit y'all.
- Mm hmm.
- Did you just say uh huh?
- Yeah, uh huh.
You get what i'm laying down.
- Which one's my d8?
- Yeah, this one that looks like two pyramids. Yeah, there—
- This, no this is my d8?
- Yeah, that's your d8.
- We gave them too, yeah we got them back.
- Roll 1d8
Plus your intelligence modifier if you would be so kind.
- Which is four, right? Eight.
- Boomer, agnes, digginsaurus rick.
And ti all gain eight temporary hits.
So it's like a little pool of hit points
On top of your normal hit points.
- Thank you.
- Y'all getting temp hit points over there?
- Aw.
- Aw man.
- Oh that's your action
and your bonus action.
I assume you're not moving anywhere.
So i think that's ti's turn.
- How temporary are they?
- They last til the end of the battle.
- Okay, cool.
- Yeah.
- Perfect.
- But if you lose them
You can't get healed back up to it.
- Gotcha, gotcha.
- Yeah, they don't, they
don't create like a new hit point—
- It's like a shield, pretty much.
- It's like a shield.
Exactly.
- Gotcha.
- And rick, that's you.
- That is, so sweet.
- I think that i wanna
How close is—
- Oh, and there's still another ant
On there right?
- No, he squished
Both the ants didn't he?
- No, just one.
- He just got one, so there is
- Those were separate—
- Is there an ant really coming for us still?
- Looks like it.
- Wait, wait, there's still an ant on the vehicle?
- Yeah, because two jumped on there.
- Okay.
- You did the right thing, i feel like. Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Just talk to him.
- So the blue car has not
moved, but will again.
- Yes. All of these things are in motion
As they're going.
- I want to prepare a, well
Just set a reaction for when the blue car
Gets close enough to jump onto it to try
To take control.
- Okay, you're gonna ready an
action for when it's within,
Within a jumping range to jump to it.
- Exactly right.
- Hell yeah, great.
- And it may be technically now it's kind
Of sketchy, but like
i, i'm a click0 man,
I need a real easy jump.
- When it's a safe clicko man distance.
- So wait, you're going to
jump to the blue truck
And not the firetruck.
- You're on the firetruck.
- You're on the firetruck bud.
You're on the firetruck.
- But not driving.
- Well, you should probably drive it.
- You're gonna be.
- I would trust you to enter a door before
I would trust myself
to jump onto a another.
Like this blue car is f*cked up.
At least you've got a shot to take.
The red car, the fire truck.
- Yeah, divide and conquer.
- Incredible, as rick's
turn ends, we enter
A new stretch of road driving
right past max's foot.
He is fast asleep.
You leave the crashed car, speed
crushed under the comforters
Behind you.
The high road terminates
in this insane ramp
Made out of an old toaster
squares box.
- At this size can we actually see, like
stink lines coming off his foot?
Like we're so small when you
actually see the particles—
- Yes. A million percent. This listless
vehicle is like swerving around
With the sleeping drivers and
you see more vehicles pull in.
This like stomping, running thing
With a little beret wearing chipmunk piloting it
Comes up behind you.
We're gonna start at the top of the order
With bean and car-Go.
- Listen all of these are cool.
Once again, that's amazing.
I feel like we need to take out the pink -
- I mean the ramp is cool. Yeah.
- Listen, we're going to hit the ramp.
- Okay.
- That's for dang sure.
- So the blue car didn't
get close enough range to
Jump on it, it got further away.
- Oh well we're going to resolve.
This is like the new section of road—
- Oh so we're in the same place.
Nobody's moved. Got it.
- Gotcha.
Yeah.
- Could, i - No, that's crazy.
That's crazy.
But i couldn't fit under
that big car, could i?
- I mean there's only one way to find out
And it could be a bad way to find out.
- Yeah, i'm not going to do it.
- No, let me back to the future tunnel scene
This sh*t.
- I'm gonna, yeah.
So i'm going to slow
down as my move action.
- Cool so you're, in other
words, you're slowing,
You're again doing the slow thing
So you have advantage on maneuvering.
- And then can i delay
my action so he can go?
- You want to delay your initiative?
Or would you like to ready an action?
- Ready an action.
- Cool. What's the action
You're readying?
- When he gets off?
I want to transform.
- Okay into your, into your
normal human shape gotcha.
- Yeah.
I'm trying to like, ah
well, cause i'm trying
To like transform and jump up.
But those are two actions, aren't they?
- Oh i see what you're—
- You can transform in motion, right?
- You can transform—
- In the car-Mo-Bot movies, the cars
Leap in the air as they transform.
- That's what i was thinking.
So like we were both—
- If you rob him of you going
Off this totally radical
ramp by turning into a dude—
- Well see no what i was doing, that's,
my move action is slowing down isn't it?
- No, i'm allowing that,
you and minetta that are doing
That for free, because we are in
a chase sequence.
- Oh, ok great. Then i'm going to slow down.
- Cool.
- And then transform and run
over the car to the back.
- Sorry, what's happening?
What are you doing?
- Okay, nevermind, let me try again.
- No, no.
- So yeah, i'm going to slow down and then
With my move action,
swerve away from the car.
So once he gets off, that's my readied action.
- You are the car.
- Oh okay, so in other words,
once, you're going to ready
An action, once bean leaps off of you,
- Yeah.
- You are going to swerve—
- To the side, away
So they can't ram me.
- Oh, swerve to the side
So they can't ram you.
- Evasive maneuvers.
- Yeah, evasive maneuvers.
- Evasive maneuvers, cool.
So you're taking the dodge action.
Anyone tries to attack, he's going
To do so his disadvantage?
- Yes.
- You are still maintaining
with your move action.
Forward momentum—
- Correct.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
- Gotcha, cool, cool, cool. Awes-
- Basically, even though i'm slowing down,
I want to make it like tougher for him—
- To hit you.
Gotcha. Go ahead and what is bean doing?
- Oh, i'm getting on that pink car.
I was, i are they up next?
- They're up next yeah.
- Can i? We're approaching them
right because he slowed down.
- Correct, they're gaining on you.
They're about to hit you.
- Okay. Is winking a free action?
- Winking is a free action.
- Okay.
- What?
Wait a minute.
- You heard him.
- Yeah.
- I look at freddy gorgonzola—
- Not his name.
- I look at teddy gruyere.
- Garbanzo?
- What's his name?
- Tony manchego.
- Tony manchego.
- And i really didn't mean
to do an accent there.
My invisalign's were slipping off my teeth.
- Manchego.
- Good motivation.
- And just look at hi and sorta just
like wink and i delay my turn.
- Oh.
- Hell yeah.
You see, he says, i want
them moochers dead.
And he fires at you instead of car-Go.
Takes a swing, hits.
- Okay.
- You are hit for
nine points of damage.
- Cool, no, i'm not.
- Wow.
- What?
- He fires it at me.
And i catch it out of midair
with deflect missiles.
It is a 1d10.
I got an eight, plus
my dex mod plus level.
That easily beats a nine.
I grabbed the ball out
of midair and i say nah.
And then for one point
of ki as a reaction,
I f*cking throw it immediately right
in his face.
- Hell yeah, you catch this bead.
Essentially wait, before
you tell me what you got,
Are you attacking tony manchego,
the cricket, or the vehicle?
I'm attacking,
I'm attack - I want the car so bad.
I'm attacking the cricket.
I'm throwing it at the cricket.
- Oh.
- Awesome. Cricket -
Oh what'd you roll?
- I got a 14 total.
- Exactly hits the cricket's ac. Hell yeah.
- Okay what kind of damage
do these bad boys do?
- They do a 2d6, but i'll let you add
Your dex modifier to this.
So it's 2d6 damage plus your dex mod.
- Where's my, where's my - Oh, here it is.
That's eight plus my dex.
Plus proficiency?
Oh yeah.
I take attack with proficiency.
- Mm hmm.
- So that is eight plus
seven, 15 points of damage.
- You! This thing hurdles at you,
You catch and like, and
whip it back
Across. This cricket goes, oh sh*t.
Boom, and is unconscious behind the wheel
Of the vehicle.
- Cool.
- And all you hear is creek, creek, creek, creek.
- I'd like to take my turn now.
- Absolutely you have delayed
your initiative in the order.
You now go after the baddies go.
I'm going to resolve
the baddies down here
Before you go. These ants,
This ant's gonna take
a swipe at digginsaurus rick.
- Good luck.
- He hits you for three points of damage.
- Okay.
- The rest of the ants rush to swarm boomer.
- Oo.
- One hits for four points of damage.
- Oh god, boomer, are you okay?
- I'm good.
- You are being swarmed by ants as
You grab the controls of this vehicle,
Just like on your carapace, on your shell
It's not too bad.
You see that felix yells
at marty and he says,
The fairy put them to sleep, wake 'em up.
And they're going to
make a, take an action to
Try to wake them up, he's got a, marty
Has got to make a dc 15 drive check.
He only gets a plus two to
the role on a 13 or higher.
He successfully hits them enough
to wake up them
In the vehicle.
We're going to roll here
on a 13 year higher.
He wakes them up. That's a 17.
- Woah. Uh oh.
- They slam in, these two come to in the vehicle.
- f*ck off.
- But they still lose that,
They only wake up at
the end of their turn,
So they don't get a turn to attack you.
- Okay.
- This chipmunk looks at you and says,
It is time for you to pay
the price for your trickery.
- French chipmuck?
- You see, oh, he's got a little beret
- He's got a little beret. That makes sense.
It all tracks now.
- He opens fire.
These are little plastic missiles,
But they got enough fairy
dust on them to work
How they're supposed to.
- Oh, sh*t. Oh no!
- Damn.
- He takes an attack.
Hits.
- Hits who or what?
- That's so many dice.
- I heard a lot of dice.
- Your vehicle has 50
hit points, five zero.
It takes 18 points of damage.
- f*ck.
- Boom! As an expl*si*n rocks
the back right of the vehicle.
- Did it get the bonus hit points
from the defender cannon?
- You can subtract eight from that.
- Hell yeah. Good call.
The vehicle is partially defended—
- 40!
- That makes the math a lot easier, too.
- These guys all continue to g*n it
After you, pursuing you.
That is the baddies' turn. Bean.
That's you baby.
- I'm going to, he's slowed
down so that the two cars
Are very close, right?
- He is slowed down.
Yes, this car has fully
like is on top of you.
- I just, yeah.
Can i just step up onto that car?
- Yeah, give me an acrobatics check.
- Okay 17 plus infinity, plus some bullshit.
- I'm going to say that
because you're going so fast
And you're facing backwards,
You just like hop up a little bit.
Like you're almost just
doing a little calf raise
And let the wind do its thing
and you are standing right
In the middle of the f*cking car.
- Okay. Does tony work for felix?
- Yes.
- He's like, his
right hand man kind of.
- Yes. Exactly.
- Left-Hand man maybe.
- Maybe left hand, i don't know.
- Speed was the right, speed was the right hand.
- But he's ambidextrous.
- And i step over the—i got chicken.
- If they didn't get it. Did we get that clean?
Ambidextrous? Ambidextrous? Okay.
- Did, can we fix that in post production?
- Let me get it clean.
- Put in the laughter.
- But he's ambidex - Alright, now we can—
- That was like a muppet.
- I say, real quick
cause nobody's driving and
We're about to hit a ramp.
Did you know about the stuff like the heap
And the mulch and all that?
- What?
- The heap. When it got all mulched up.
- Yeah, you f*ck' heapers—
- Okay, cool, cool i
just want to make sure
And i'm going to attack him so many times.
- You thought you could win him over.
- I'm going to use the, i just
wanted to make sure, i whip out
The q-Tip first.
And this time i reach
back with the soft end
And then i flip it around
and now i'm going to try
And smash him with the hurty side.
That's a 20.
- That's a hit.
- 1d8 plus five.
That's 13.
It's max damage.
And then immediately i plant
up the soft side of
The q-Tip in the floor of
the car and do a f*cking
Crane kick up into his
skull with my bonus attack
That i get after doing,
a that's a crit fail.
- Crit fail, gotcha. Cool.
- And so i miss and
i'm like, i can't end it,
That's not a cool way to end it.
And i attack two more
times with flurry of blows
Burning another ki point.
- Jesus christ.
- It's because i rolled with the blue plastic
dice, this is, ugh.
- Yeah, yeah yeah yeah.
Oh no, you missed.
- That one didn't go in the box.
That's a 19.
- That hits.
- So that is nine more points of damage.
And then with my other of the two blows, crit.
- Nat 20?
- Nat 20.
- Go ahead and roll 2d four plus five.
- Oh boy.
- Are the russo brothers directing this?
- That's 10 points damage total.
So 19 plus 13 as a, yeah 32.
- You smash him over the head.
His little dumb hat cracks in half.
- Aw that was sad now.
- You full like flag on a windy day.
Horizontal your body
with your planted q-Tip
And just bicycle kick
this dude over and over
And over in the head
and on the final kick,
He is lifted up into the
air, out of the vehicle
And sails dead into the darkness
Behind the racing vehicle.
- Okay.
- You k*lled the big cheese.
- The final thing, i do his
turn to see the driverless car
That i now standing in
zooming towards the ramp
And i just kind of like to brace myself.
- No, no, that's what is. I curl
up into a little ball
And just kind of—
- Into a little bean.
- I got this.
- A little bean.
- A hundred percent. You head for that ramp.
You've used your action, your bonus action.
- That's fine.
- Okay!
- This is some fast and furious sh*t.
Hell yeah, that's gotta be boomer.
- Boomer releases the ladder
And jumps up on it and as it swings around
He's going to attack marty and he is—
- You're just riding it like a—
- No, he jumps up on it.
- Okay. So you, so you, you use the controls,
You swivel the ladder.
The ants are all sh—
- I actually think it
would go the other way.
- Oh, you want it to go the other way?
Sure yeah yeah that's fine.
- Does it matter which way it goes?
- Yeah 'cause i don't want him to—
- Sure.
- Yeah, i think it would.
- I don't know if it's framed that way.
- Swing around that way.
- There we go.
- Oh my god, yeah.
- And then attack marty and use menacing.
- What is that?
- Menacing: when you take the—
- A noun! No,--
- When you take the attack action on your turn,
You can replace one attack with an attempt
To demoralize one humanoid.
- You can see within 30
feet of you that can see
And hear you. Make a charisma
check, intimidation, contested
By the target's wisdom insight check.
- He shouldn't be too hard to demoralize.
It's marty we're talking about.
- Exactly. I know, that's why i picked him.
- Incredible. You see boomer,
You hit the button, grab on to the ladder
And you're like thundering
down as it's swiveling through the—
- And i figure that, maybe,
shakes the ants off of him?
- Oh, i will, this is so fun and creative.
I'm gonna roll dex saves
for these three ants
Remaining on there.
We'll make it box a doom,
We'll call it a dc 13 dex save.
These each got plus one.
We need 12 or higher on these ants.
However, if you, if
i make them roll this,
I'm going to make
you roll the same role.
- That's fine.
- Okay.
One of the ants is
flung off of the ladder.
Boom, go ahead and give me your dex saving throw.
- 19.
- Holy sh*t.
- Whoa, incredible.
- I didn't realize we
were all saving our good
Rolls until the last episode.
- It matters.
- Well, in this one if we fail, we fall off a
car and die, so like.
- A lot, it's a lot riding on this.
Get it, riding on this?
- So, how do i do this?
I mean, it says with, you
can replace one attack
With an attempt to demoralize—
- As a fourth level fighter,
You have one that's attack as your action.
So this is now going to be replaced -
However, given that you've
just done an insane fast
And the furious style
stunt, i'm going to say
Roll your intimidate check with advantage.
- Okay.
13 plus seven intimidation, which is 20.
- That's 20.
- 20.
- Try another one.
- Roll and see if you crit.
- You might crit if you get higher than 13,
You would crit.
- No.
- Marty's going to roll.
This is, what does it say the effect
of demoralizing is?
- Aw, poor marty.
- He gets really sad.
- Yeah. The target is frightened.
- He's a sad guy.
- Oh, he's frightened.
Okay, great.
- Until end of your next turn,
I don't know what that does to him.
- It means he can't approach you.
He gets disadvantage on everything.
- He can't move closer to you.
- Okay.
- Hell yeah.
He's got a beat a 20.
He, oh he, he needs to
roll a nat 20 to succeed on this.
He does not have any bonuses
to insight in any way,
Shape or form.
17 is pretty good.
It's not a nat 20.
You thunder down.
What do you say to marty
as you approach him?
- Nothing personal marty, you were
always pretty decent to me,
But you're a f*ck up.
- Ah! I am a f*ck up.
And he starts steering wildly.
- That's all it - He was razor thin. This poor guy—
- Wildly intimidating.
- Now can i use action surge again?
- No, you have to have a short rest.
- You have to have a short rest.
- You can't use action surge again.
You fully intimidate marty
and you're on the hood
And the ladder has attached down here.
The other ants are going
to get attacks of opportunity
On you as you rush past them.
- Justin, did you delay your turn?
- Yeah, i readied an action
- He readied an action.
- But i don't know if it's ever going to happen.
- Oh, you were going to get on the blue car. Okay.
- Yeah.
- They're awake now though.
Yeah.
- Yeah, i could probably change,
like if i saw them wake up,
I could probably change my tactics.
Right? Is less—
- You'd have to wait until your next
turn to change your tactics.
- All right, perfect.
- You take another eight
points of damage from ants as
You thunder past them, boom boom boom.
Because they're biting
You as you rush past them.
- Okay. Still doing really good.
- Yeah, i'm alright.
- How much are you at?
- I'm at 40.
- Rocky, baby!
- Rocky, baby. This guy can't go down.
- I always get back up.
- Incredible.
That is boomer's turn, yeah.
- I'd also like to point out
That the ladder is now
attached to their car,
Which is steering wildly.
And there's nobody driving the ladder truck.
- You did great.
- Okay.
- That's extremely dangerous.
- It's a very bad—
- Extremely dangerous, but not just to boomer.
- Yeah.
- And also admittedly a
boomer can fly and marty
And felix can not.
- Oo!
- Exactly.
- Smart.
- Incredible. Agnes, that's you.
- Ah, cool, could i, is there
a way that dancing lights
Could work as like if i put them in front
Of somebody's eyes, who's driving as like,
They're not able to see,
they're kind of blinded by them?
- I would let you i would
let you give disadvantage
To someone's driving check if
you wanted to do it that way.
- Okay, cool. She's going to take a
drag of her cigarette
And flick it and four
little lights are gonna
Come out of the ashes of the end of it
- That's so cool.
- And then it's going to
go right in front of,
You're not in that car, right?
I want to make sure everyone's safe.
- The blue? The blue one?
- Yeah, this blue guy who i tried to make safe.
- Aw, they just woke up!
- You are really f*cking with these guys' brains.
- He's like, ooo!
- Aw man!
- Man, i had the weirdest dream.
- Which one would i roll?
- You don't roll anything, that, you just
automatically, it just happens.
- Oh, so that just happens.
- You automatically impose
that condition on them.
Minetta sees this bad situation
And sees this ramp up ahead.
She's actually gonna g*n it,
I think. She hits the f*cking gas.
- This ramp?
- Woo.
- This ramp right here. Yeah.
- There's so many ramps.
- Yeah.
- Ti.
That's you.
- We're getting awful close to those ba*ls.
- I go on my gears and i spill some,
We're ahead now, right?
We're gunning it.
So we're like,
- Oh yeah, you pull ahead of this guy.
You're like here.
- So can i spill grease like right here?
- Love grease.
- It's the perfect time for this.
- In-Credible.
Yes, you absolutely can.
You don't have to roll anything.
You guys do.
You spell casters, you just
say what f*cking happens.
You, the magic sparkling cigarette
Ash flies out of the car.
You hit the thing on the
back of one of your mods.
Bam, oil blast out of
the back of the vehicle
Going all over the already kind of greasy
Pizza box.
- Disgusting.
- Rick, that's you.
- Okay.
I'm going to climb up to
the top of the ballista.
- Ooh hell yeah great.
- Oh, that's your movement.
- You still have an action.
- Right. Is there any more a*mo?
- Yeah, oh, there's a ton.
- Okay i'm gonna aim
the ballista at the rat.
- At the chipmunk?
- The chipmunk, the french chipmunk? Yes.
- Sacre bleu!
- I've never been out - I don't know, i don't know rodents.
- Diggins-Saurus rick hops up.
- Ah, mon amie.
- Ah, ah, incredible.
- Go ahead and give me an attack roll.
- Dex plus, dex plus proficiency.
- And we can't help him with that.
- 13?
- Hold on one second.
- It's a squirrel.
- I know that's a squirrel.
- Chipmunk.
- Chipmunk. That's a weak squirrel.
- Yeah, that's like a level one squirrel.
- That is a successful hit.
- Oh, thank god.
- And this thing does 2d8 plus six damage.
- Holy sh*t.
- I will tell you right now,
this little dude up here
Has got 15 hit points.
- 2d8 plus how much?
- Six.
- So you got to get nine with
your two dice.
- That is... Nine!
- You look back at
This guy this, this little dude in the beret
Who just fired on your
car, you clamber up.
Get up to the ballista up there.
What does rick do
As he gets to the controls of the ballista?
- He says, enjoy oblivion, rat.
- This chipmunk is f*cking impaled.
Falls off to the side and
i'm going to say explodes.
- You hear, you hear from the top ramp—
- How's your f*cking crotch dude? Bad, it seems.
- Mon dieu, mon dieu, mon dieu.
You hear it from the top
Ramp, you hear bean yell,
Say bon voyage.
Yell bon voyage!
- Bon voyage.
- Hell yeah, hell yeah, hell yeah!
- Amazing.
- Le squeak, le squeak, le squeak.
- Because the grease is here
We actually, even though
this is the end of the round,
We actually have to roll savings throws
For all the vehicles on
the lower road real quick.
These are all going to
be box of doom because
Of the speed that you
guys are all going at.
One of the ants jumps
here with their reaction
To grab the controls of the vehicle.
The dc of your grease is i believe, 14?
- The dc of your grease is 14.
There's another one—
- The dc of your grease is 14, whoa.
- How would i know what the dc of my grease is?
- I actually have it right here, the dc of
your grease is 14.
- Okay.
- Okay. These ants get a plus three to this roll.
So that's going to, so they
need an 11 or higher to save.
They roll a five.
I'm going to roll for this
vehicle, which has disadvantage
On this saving throw. These
guys get a plus four to this, which means
On a 10 or higher, they save.
- Wait, the one you just rolled
For was the firetruck?
- Firetruck yes.
- Okay.
- You gotta fly, baby.
- It's going to get messy very, very quickly.
- You're going to have to,
once i find out you could fly,
I'm like, alright, take him out.
This is blue.
They roll with
disadvantage. They've got to get
A, they've got to get 10
or higher, 18 and six,
They hit the grease and just,
the sleeps on their face,
Hit it, wipe out, roll
and wipe the f*ck out.
Marty also is demoralized and
is going to make this roll
With disadvantage and the
car that it's attached to,
Is fish-Tailing over the road.
- He's got good dexterity,
So he also just needs to
roll a 10 or higher. 11 and 19.
- Oh.
- You watch this one wipe out. All of them wipe out.
You see that as this one
hits, it goes to spin.
Marty screaming in terror
from boomer, they flip around
And the attached ladder swivels this.
So now instead of this
leading this is leading this
And dragging the firetruck behind it.
- I thought this car hit the grease,
The firetruck, the ants hit
the grease, didn't they?
- They did.
But because the ladder is
attached, they lose control
Of the vehicle and it ends up being towed
behind this one.
- So it's gonna slow him down a little bit. For sure.
- It will slow him down a little bit.
And with that we move to the
next section of road.
- Oh my god.
- The blue car wipes out.
The walker wipes out.
You see that you guys tear
away in the getaway vehicle.
The fire truck swivels behind
felix's personal vehicle
And is now being towed behind them.
You see that, that's on the low road.
You guys head up that book cover
To the next section of
bed, car-Go and bean
You had for the ramp. As you hit the ramp
I am going to need dexterity.
I'm gonna need either
athletics or acrobatics
Checks from both of you.
Let me know what you roll.
- Can you first, please.
- A 13, no.
14 total with acrobatics
- 14 total with acrobatics.
- Oh wait, for a saving throw?
Oh no, no, just the check, alright.
- I only got a 24.
- You jerk.
- With a 24, you guys hit the
ramp as you guys sail through the air,
Bean on a 24, you're, you are
a master of wind, floating.
As you feel the car begin to float
Away from your feet, you
can either try to stay
In this vehicle and ride out it's landing.
If you want to make a mech
check or you can attempt
To let this thing do
whatever's going to happen
And get back to car-Go that
you see is kind of like
In his car form, flailing
through the air a little bit.
- So in order to land on the car,
I would have to make a mech check.
- I don't want to drive the car.
- I want to land where
i'm where i was standing.
So i need to make a mech check for that.
- If you want to stay in the car,
It would spiral out of control unless
You started steering it.
So i think you can stay
in the car and stear it,
Or you can through the
air with a 24 acrobatics,
You could make it back to car-Go.
And try to help him—
- Okay. So if i fail this mech check.
Oh wait, to help him f*ck, you're okay.
- No, i'm saying yes, please. Help me.
I can see how that was confusing.
- It's basically like, you're either like
if you want to be driving
This vehicle and have, and it basically—
- I don't want to leave him to die.
Like we, and he did not get a very good roll.
So if i can help him in
any way by landing on him,
- You in mid air, sailing over the bed,
Push off from the pink
vehicle and like a f*cking
Dancer sail through the air,
grab car-Go and you give him
An advantage on this dexterity.
- Please god.
- 16 acrobat - 21.
- Incredible. Roll to see if you crit,
but that's great that,
That's going to save, for sure.
- No, that was a 20.
- Cool. You start to lose control and you're like,
I'm gonna hit my side
i'm gonna hit my side.
I'm gonna take damage.
You feel the moocher,
the hand on your thing.
Look up from your headlight
and see bean pull you through
The air so that you
are wheels down instead
Of hood down and you land side by side
With the getaway vehicle
in this new terrain.
- Sick.
- You alright, man?
- Doing great.
I had to leave the catapult car behind
And all the possibilities
that it was going to bring, so.
- No, i know. I totally get that.
But i do appreciate not being dead, a lot
- Yeah.
- New terrain appears before you.
You see books leading to
a box of saltine crackers
And facial tissue down to a little tablet
With this kind of like
calculator slip cover,
Shakily over max's hand here.
- Oh wait, i just want to see his hand.
- Missed the hand.
- Saltine cr*cker not copyrighted?
- So let me ask you, these
are, we're just seeing
Like a cross section. These
are not like body parts
Laying in the bed.
- No, no, no.
- Okay.
Alright.
- We're like—
- He needs to moisturize.
- He has approached—
- Oh, i think he's been seen plenty of moisturizing.
- Hey teen wolf, let's get out of here.
- Oi, pops.
- Hey, you brought up what's
going on with the kleenex.
- Yeah. I said, these are nasty boy tissues
- This one takes a dive down here.
This one's right back over here.
- Dang how are they so close?
- I think they're closer
probably to me than to you.
- Oh, that fire truck is still really cute.
- That fire truck doesn't have a soul? It has a face.
- So they didn't have to roll? They didn't have to roll—
- They didn't have to roll what?
- They didn't go over the ramp.
- Oh, they jut went straight up, right on.
- Bada boom. That's going on there.
- Wait, so where are we?
- We're still on the like, oh.
- Oh, you are ahead of them.
Cause minetta gunned it, so you guys are
- Oo.
- Barreling over the bridge right now.
- On the calculator.
- You guys hear
- Oh my god.
- Oh man. How deep is your toy box?
- Oh snap.
- Oh my god!
- A drone? Wait, it's the turtle!
- Who's piloting it? Is that dantes?
- No.
- That's not dantes, look at his ordinary-a*s
shell. His ugly, sh*t-Head shell.
- It's not dantes?
- And his beachcomber hat.
- Oh no, there's more than one.
- Oh my god.
- That is wrong.
If we weren't taking these things out,
Like it was our job, we would
Have so many cars and things following us.
Were these gonna come out whether or not
we beat the other cars?
- That is so f*cking cool.
- Oh yes.
This was the way it was—
- So it was just going to keep stacking up.
- It was cummulative, it was stacked and stacked.
- Who's that?
- One of the stewards from before.
Starting at the top of the
order is now actually
Just car-Go because of the
delayed initiative earlier
In the fight.
- Oh, right, right, right, right,
right, right, right, right.
Oh my jesus, okay.
I don't have a lot i can
do against helicopters.
I'm gonna delay my turn.
- Hmm.
- Okay, cool.
- And see, see what plays out
because nothing's occurring
To me right away.
- Alright.
- How are car-Go's hit points?
- I mean, i'm not super great. 16.
- 16.
- Okay, sh*t.
- So, another reason i don't
want to just start slamming
Wildly into cars.
- Yeah.
- That's good to know.
- This helicopter is going to fire a rocket
At the getaway vehicle.
- Oh my f*cking god.
- He just gets to come into our fight.
And just like start firing rockets.
- Yeah, you haven't put the time in, turtle.
- Yeah, we've all been waiting for our turns, patiently.
- We've been here.
- You don't just get to come in, okay.
- You, more like turd-Tle, 'cause he's a turd.
- Hell yeah.
- On a natural 3, that rocket misses.
- Oh, thank god.
- Oh! f*ck you.
- It hits max's hand and blows up his hand.
- Boom! Huge expl*si*n of flame sets
The sets, the tissue box, afire.
- Whew!
- Oh no. The littles!
- This one's going to take
a swipe and drop this sort
Of like something-Filled water balloon.
This like giant balloon
on the getaway vehicle.
- Ew.
- You don't say what it is, everybody assumes it's jizz.
- Oh, see i went to pee. You nasty.
- Yeah, he jizzed in a balloon
And then collected it.
- He jizzed in a balloon,
Cause it was nasty.
- The size of that balloon, that's a lot of jizz.
- For them, for him it's a normal amount of jizz
but we're tiny.
- That's a lot of, that's a lot of, wait
The boy's jizz? I thought you means that was bitty
folk jizz, and they've been collecting that, and that
That k*lled eight bitty folk to get that much jizz.
- Yeah, if we can just get one of the cameras
To zoom in on that balloon for scale,
and then you go ahead
And say that's a normal
amount of jizz. Just get in
The background of it, cause—
- That's a normal amount of jizz,
and i know jizz.
- Man, the forced persective on
that's going to be awesome.
- Oh no.
- This is why you get behind the paywall, folks.
I mean, you're not going to get this for free.
- Get behind it.
- Incredible.
Okay ah, this, this
chopper swoops in, drops
That i was gonna make an attack roll here.
That's going to be a successful hit.
I'm going to need dexterity saving throws
From digginsaurus rick, ti, and agnes.
- What do i throw? A 20?
- How is it - Like, explain to me mechanically
what happening. It's like sh**ting it at us?
- It drops the net, and this b*mb hits the
spikes and splashes everybody.
- So the positioning that we're
seeing here is not necessarily
Representative of where we're all at, right?
- Dexterity, oh.
- Or actually, in other words,
it's going to make a move as well,
- It just wouldn't make sense, okay.
- So it
Flies over here, makes its move.
And in the midst of its move as it...
- Releases the jizz,
- Drops the - Let's just... It's just a water balloon.
- Is that our d20s plus dex?
- In the little saving throws box you'll see—
- Yeah, so plus four.
- Okay, great. But a d20?
- A d20. Mm hmm.
- You go.
- Oh, thank you.
- Oh cool, a one.
- Gotcha.
- Plus seven, is eight.
- Six, plus four is 10.
- Three!
- Oh my god.
- Then minetta rolls hers.
Not great.
- How many—
- I'm also going to ask you to roll a mech check
For damage to the getaway vehicle.
- Okay.
- So that's going to be it's
saving throw, roll me a mech
Check real quick.
- Do i roll with advantage cause i roll advantage on mech?
- Oh actually sorry.
Minetta is the one driving, so minetta
Is actually gonna roll that.
- Can i give her advantage
cause i made the car?
- Sure you can give her advantage.
Okay, the car does make it's save.
- Okay. And let's not forget
This car can self-Destruct.
If we ever need to jump
out and someone sacrifice themselves.
- Awesome.
- Or i use mage hand.
- There you go.
- I'm serious.
- Ti, agnes and rick, you
guys each take 19 points of damage.
- Minus 8, minus 8.
- Oh yeah. Chews through the temp hp.
Minetta also takes 19. The car only takes
Nine points of damage, but
it's already had its shield eaten through.
- Right.
- So now it's at 31 hit points.
- Okay.
- That's true.
- Felix flick takes a bonus action
Disengage, leaps from his seat.
Makes an acrobatics check.
- But that thing is gone now, right?
It can't throw that out as again.
Yes.
It only had one.
- Okay, now we're all covered in jizz.
- What was it?
- You see, what was in there is like paint thinner
mixed with battery acid, mixed with—
- Oh.
- Like horrifying.
You can feel it, you're plastic.
The paint melts a little bit.
- Oh no.
- Yo, protect your face, bud.
- Digginsaurus.
- It sounds like something i would drink.
- He's got extra faces.
- Felix springs past boomer
alights on the back of car-Go jones.
He's going to take some-
- You dumb piece of sh*t.
- There's two of us and only one of him.
- Yeah, right?
- What do i do?
- You have two bang snaps, also.
- I know. I was just saving them for
something bigger, but this looks like it's it.
- He deals bean 18 points of damage.
- f*ck.
- How's my bean?
- I'm fine.
I was untouched, but still, it's not great.
- He hurts my bean?
- He leaps across, takes out a jagged
Little piece of metal and slashes across—
- A little jagged little pill.
- You see that- He leaps across.
He looks at you, bean, on
the back of car-Go. Leaps
There, slashes across,
the blood goes everywhere.
He says, i'm fixin' at learn you
something boy, i ain't going
Back to the heap.
- Call him by his name.
- It's tip! Just the tip.
- I know.
- Marty with disadvantage is going to try
To throw boomer from the car.
He does not succeed on a natural five.
These ants dislodge the ladder
And continue surging forward.
They're going to g*n it as well.
That is the end of the, that's, and car-Go
You delayed your action as well, right?
- Correct.
- How close are we to the window?
- Oh, you can see the window.
It's coming up.
The window is coming up.
That's going to be bean.
- And car-Go yells,
Get off bean.
- I'll do what i f*cking want, bud.
He's just knocked
half the life out of me.
- Okay.
- What? No, when is that, car-Go took his action
Cause he had delayed, right?
- Or no. He just delayed initiative.
So he chose to—
- We're still at the top of the order.
- Oh, okay.
- He let the baddies go first, effectively.
- Yeah.
- I say there ain't much heap to go back to, tip.
But what's there, is
something that somebody
Like you, just can't destroy.
And i'm going to make an
acrobatic maneuver here.
I am going to,
Are there rails on top of his,
It's a station wagon.
- A luggage rack, yes.
- Okay, i want to open his
side door and hang off
And then try and pull felix
towards me, on the side
Of the car into the open door
that i've just flung open.
- You are trying to pull felix
With you into the cabin.
- Open door.
- The open door of car-Go jones.
- Yes.
- This is gonna be a really
simple opposed athletics roll.
This is box of doom for sure.
Go ahead.
I'll tell you, i'll roll
Felix's first—
- And i'm going to say i'm helping him
Like kind of, i'm going
to shake a little bit, you know.
- If you want to use your
turn to give the help action
Here, you can do it.
You've delayed your initiative.
- Oh, then i'll, then i won't.
- Then you won't.
Cool, so this is going
to be flat athletics.
He, felix gets a plus six to this roll.
- Wow, that's a lot.
- I told you he's got two olives
on a toothpick out back.
He rolled natural three.
You, all you have to do is beat a nine.
Roll in the box, man.
- Roll in the box.
- You got it.
- Oh my god.
- What?
- Four plus what?
- Plus three.
- Are you sure it's an athletics role?
- I am sure it's an athletics.
What you're trying to shove somebody in.
- So, seven.
- You grab him.
You were like wrestling on
the top of the speeding car.
- Was that an attack?
- That was an attack, yes.
- Okay, i'm going to use my
bonus attack to try again.
- Okay, yeah, absolutely.
Felix gets a plus six to this roll.
- Yeah. Let's go same time.
- He rolls a nat 20.
- Oh my god!
- I try the second time and
it doesn't quite make it.
Can i flurry of blows
to try two more times?
- You get two more attempts to do this.
He on that nat 20 like brings
you to one of your knees
As you attempt to, and gets one
of your hands and closes it.
He says, you ain't nothing but a little
hayseed watermelon monk,
And when i put you in the
dirt, i'm gonna put buttons
And all 'em in the dirt too.
I made to the house,
I crawled to the top and i'm
going to keep crawling higher
And higher until i'm as high as any human
In this damned world.
- Felix, what happened to you?
- Somebody hurt him.
- What? Yeah.
- Who hurt you?
- Okay go ahead.
I will say you can either that nat 20,
He got, you can either
take some additional damage
From just like an unarmed attack
From him—
- Oh yeah, punch me.
He deals you five
more points of damage.
- Okay, that hurts quite a bit.
- Okay, what's he down to?
- 10.
- Okay.
- He gets a 15, 13 plus—
- Five. Oh plus three is six—
- 16. You pull him into the car.
- I pull him into the car,
- Yes!
- And while we're sitting there in the car,
I say, you can go wherever
you want in this house
Partner, and let me help
you out with a little ride.
I buckle his seatbelt.
I say drive safely.
And i use my last point of
ki for a patient defense.
And i go out the other
door with a dodge action,
Onto open road.
- And then it's my turn
- Onto open road!
- Yes, yes, yes!
- Ah, incredible.
Here's your die.
- Thank you.
- Whew, what a turn.
- And now—
- You see me just tucking and rolling. Like—
- You tuck and roll out of the vehicle.
You take a dodge action.
So i'm going to say that all the damage
From the road rash is
just going to be halved.
- Okay.
- I will roll damage for that right now.
Give me a dexterity saving
Throw, as you jump out of the car.
- 14?
- You dip out past here.
Boomer, can you give me a
dexterity saving throw?
- 15 plus nada.
- You fly past, you take five,
11, 15 points of damage
halved with the dodge action.
- Is this fall damage.
- Yeah, this is fall damage.
- Okay.
I actually don't take any damage.
Because i'm a monk and i subtract
20 from fall damage, so.
- Oh my god.
- Perfect somersault, you hit
the road. Boomer on a 15 save,
You see your boy dip out
of the car and you reach
One of your many hands down and whew.
Scoop bean up off the
road onto the vehicle right
Here next to you. Bean
you are in the brawny
Arms of boomer, one
vehicle back from car-Go
And watch a felix fumbling with a seatbelt
- And he just feels the seatbelt tighten.
- Incredible. Bean you were back over here.
- Car-Go would like to take his turn now.
- Yes, car-Go may take his turn now.
- And he's going to say over the radio,
You threatened me.
You tried to k*ll me.
That's fine.
I can deal with that.
You threatened my friends.
Well, that pisses me off.
And you threatened dylan.
f*ck you.
And transforms with him inside.
Ooh.
- Okay.
Felix is not proficient
in strength saving throws.
So he only gets a plus four to this.
- Oo. That's still better than me.
- He rolls a natural four, you need
To beat an eight on an athletics check.
- Come on.
- You see he goes, struggles
at the belt buckle.
Car-Mo-Bot, transform.
Wait, maybe that's not legally clean.
- Convert?
- Yeah, you see he goes—
- Convert!
- Car-Mo-Bot, engage!
Wait, that's also a thing they say, right?
- Yeah.
- Convert. Say convert!
- Change your whole body.
- Change your whole body.
- You see him struggling
with his belt, pulling at it.
Wait, wait, wait.
Y'all, you gotta help me!
You hear, car-M-Bot, convert.
In a raining hail of
blood and viscera and gore,
A bright red car-Go jones leaps
Into the air.
Felix flick is gone.
- Ooo!
- I yell from his arms.
I told y'all that's what would happen.
- Hell yeah.
- Insane, does car-Go make
a, that's your action.
Are you gonna are you gonna
try to jump onto a vehicle?
Are you gonna like—
- Do we, can we tell the other people
To back off now that he's dead?
- Okay, well first cause you, you've got,
You were going full car
speed and then transformed.
So i wanna know with your movement action,
Are you, is there anything
you are trying to do?
Are you trying to grab -
You can try to grab one
of the cars behind you.
- Yeah i would say at that
point, like if i've jumped
In the air to do it,
I'm trying to grab on to,
let's say the green car
Cause that's where my friends is.
- Cool.
Give me an acrobatics check.
- Okay, i'm shaking.
Please take your dice out of there.
- Hey, what'd he roll?
- Oh he rolled a 13.
- Okay.
- He rolled a 13, plus whatever
His athletics is.
- Yeah.
- Oop! Two?
- Okay, boomer.
I'm gonna need you to make a
dexterity saving throw again.
- Help me! Help me!
- Go boomer.
- Two.
- Oh boy.
- Car-Go you transform.
You don't roll badly enough
to get hit by any of the
Unrushing vehicles, but the cars,
whip passed you on the road
As you land covered in blood.
That is going to be these,
All these cars race past you.
You are left back on the
saltines as these guys go
Passed you on either side.
You watched car-Go
standing there victorious
As both helicopters
turn their g*ns on you.
- Okay.
Boomer, that's going to be you.
- He's still got the bad
guy radio on him, doesn't he?
- Who?
- Boomer, a bad guy radio.
- Oh, yeah. I thought you meant does—
- He does still have
the bad guy radio, yes.
So he is connected to the helicopters
And everybody else involved in this chase.
- Not only that, but you also have a bad guy radio
Just in the, in the seat
right here with marty
In front of you.
- Okay, he activates it
and he says, friends rodents,
Caterpillars, lend me your membranes.
Felix has been chewed
up into so much sausage
There's really no need for
you guys to keep this up.
We've already wiped out most of ya.
Back off, you're gonna be okay.
- Please make an intimidate
check with advantage.
- Because of the sausage.
- Because i just squished a man?
- Because of just the most
horrible thing ever happened.
- 17, plus seven is a 24.
- 24.
- 19, plus seven, which is a 20-Freaking-Six.
- There it is.
- You see you got a, that's a 10-4 boomer.
You see the helicopters peel
away, the ants, abandon ship.
We had a whole other battle map.
Actually i'm gonna say
that as the getaway vehicle
Peels out of here we're
going to, one last time,
Change to a new section
of road. The getaway vehicle
Need no longer get away.
You see a ramp leading up, beyond that
Is the window sill and
freedom, outside the house
Minetta, at the wheel turns back to you
And says, do we need to take
the jump or do we stop and
Face him down here?
- Ah, face who?
We exploded felix.
- You see she goes - Marty?
- I think we could probably take marty,
- Oh, you see the she, err, like
slides the getaway vehicle
Around this way.
We exit initiative, we exit combat.
- Whoo.
- Oh god, it's such a psychological—
- It really is.
- You see car-Go, you walk up. Bean, car-Go,
You look at each other, you
see that marty goes, i'm like,
Man, you gotta understand, man.
It's been so many years.
We were just, we just thought we could
be stewards in the house.
And, and then, and then
we came in and dexter
Said it was wrong.
We found a family
stewards named the flicks.
And felix said it was,
if we just took them out,
We could start over and we
could start in the house.
Dexter said, we, it was wrong.
It's so nice in the house.
- It's pretty bad out in the yard, tap.
And you know that firsthand, right?
- I know that firsthand.
- Are your real sorry tap?
- I'm really sorry.
And listen, you can have
the roll of quarters.
- What do you mean? They're ours.
- Damn straight.
- Yeah, my dude.
- And i know you have that peanut,
and i know that felix was using that
To get all them toys
marching to the beat his drum.
You see minetta looks at him and
says, yeah, yeah, we know.
You see, he goes, but listen,
you got everything you need.
So we just, we just gone go ahead
And you go back and you got the quarters
And you have every, all
your dreams come true
And we'll call it there.
- Who's we?
- Me and the, and the, you know, the
fellas that worked for felix.
- Don't nobody work for felix no more.
- Well, there's a, there's just
that there's a lot of stewards
Like felix that are, you
know, in other houses.
And that had been kind of working with him
And doing stuff like that.
And you know, i mean, i
can, i can name names,
But you know, bad people
and, and they're gonna
Want someone to do business with.
So,
- You know,
Best business person i know is, you know,
Sitting right over here.
I mean, she's a fount of wisdom.
I mean, she knows all about the business.
She's well-Connected, everybody likes her.
I think as you are
transitioning your industry,
This would be a great person
to teach you how to do it.
- Just tried to wrap it
up in about two months, eh?
- I see that you guys
laugh and marty's like,
I don't get it. Look, the
important thing is this,
I just, i just want you
all to know that we can,
You got what you needed.
Y'all don't have any
business being in the house.
Let the stewards do what the stewards do.
Y'all go on your way and have
a great rest of your life.
- I lift him up out of
the seat of the car.
Do i need to roll for that?
- You do not need to roll for that.
- Okay i say, you're done deciding who gets
To be in the house, bud.
- I sh- No.
- I, i, i. As you hold him out
you hear a little click
And in a hidden compartment
underneath here,
Walking out from where felix's
throne was, dantes emerges.
- Yes!
- Dantes!
- Wait, hold on.
- Well, well, well.
- Wait a minute.
- Dantes emerges with a little, one
Of felix's little camera, recorder,
Cell phone things and says,
i'd say you're done just hiding
Much of anything at all. Click.
It's all been recorded.
And i do apologize if i've got you feeling
A little, jumpy? Grass coppers.
- Yes.
Grass coppers!
- I turn him over
to the, i say, book him?
- And he says, f*ck yeah, bro. I knew you—
- I f*cking knew it, man!
- I f*cking knew it, dude.
We f*cking got it, we got
marty flick up here, guys.
Let's f*cking bounce.
What's up?
- Yay!
- Freeze frame, and it is a golden afternoon.
The labor day party barbecue
of all labor day party
Barbecues is underway. The
littles are so excited.
They've got an incredible spread out.
No peanuts at all.
It's a barbecue for the ages.
You see that susan, as people
are starting to like, the sun's setting,
This beautiful golden light
everywhere, you see that
She looks around and says,
You sure no one wants to take it?
Nobody.
You gotta be kidding -
Please, everyone
Grab boxes, grab cupcakes.
My god, we can't have all this -
We don't have room in the fridge.
She goes, i hate to throw
something like this away,
But we just don't have the space for it.
She takes, i mean, they
had so many guests,
So she thought she was
buying what they would use,
But you know, sometimes
it doesn't all get eaten
And she walks over and on a
heap piled high of compost,
A whole watermelon is dropped
right on top of the heap.
With all the foods scattered outdoors
On this beautiful, beautiful day,
Describe to me where you guys
are and what you're doing.
You see susan walks
back, you see that dylan
Looks out and says, mom,
Can i have just like a
little candy, something?
She's like, dylan,
you know we don't like you having
Those processed sugars.
That's rule number one.
No processed sugars, no candy.
You know, an apple is very sweet too.
It's nature's candy.
So, something to think about. You see, he says,
I just, i went back to school, i
should have one candy ball.
You see that he sort of mopes off.
It's, it's a beautiful, a
wonderful day in the yard.
Where do you guys think you're enjoying
Your victory champagne?
- I'm sitting with master
buttons and just eatin'
Some cheeto and i say,
i know we're supposed
To swear off processed foods,
But they are on to something
at the eeto corporation.
- You see master buttons says you know,
I'll tell you what bean,
i'd always saw these
As forbidden foods, but i
guess the forbidden fruit
Is sweeter 'cause these giant cheese puffs,
They are something else.
- I say, i think that
our, maybe our diet needs
To change with our surroundings
Because we're having this
conversation on the window
Sill of max's room looking
down at the heap while
The rest of the heapers
who used to live down
There, are making their
new home in a new heap,
Which is all the trash
that is in max's room.
- A caravan of partying, little moochers
Carrying their belongings on their back.
Heapers, tik teks, all scale over.
You see that max is listen
to incredible loud music
Just hunched over his computer.
No idea of the little convoy
of these moochers moving
Into the house.
You see the tik teks
and heapers embracing
And partying and having a great old time.
And what's ti up to in this
big move into the house.
- I met, i'm giving my parents are hug.
- You see, they're giving you, say, ti,
We are so proud of you.
Everything you did was
completely unacceptable.
And i mean, m*rder and grand larceny.
- I saw some things,
i've got a taste of something and
Now i want a full meal of it.
- You see, they go,
god, you're so amazing.
And we are so deeply, deeply concerned.
They ruffle your hair.
You see an endless room full of crumbs.
- Old half-Finished bags of popcorn,
Whole entire pizza crusts, the bounty
Of a filthy teenagers room.
- Everything a moocher could ever want.
- Is trey mushroom there, trey fungus there.
Oh, fun gus.
- Fun gus comes over, he goes, you see he
walks along and goes, all right,
It is damp as hell in here.
What's going on?
Comes along in, you see a
small community of stewards
Comes out and you see that
they unfurl a little sort
Of formal banner.
It's not decorated
too prettily, but you see
It just a little formal,
welcome to the neighborhood.
And you see, they come
over and they someone says,
On behalf of the stewards
of number four thimblelane,
I'd like to extend
welcome to the neighborhood
And the most heartfelt apology.
We had no idea that
a criminal mastermind
Was murdering all kinds of people.
- Huge, huge upsetting news and i for one,
Am appalled. I hate to think
about their behavior
Happening inside the
house. In any case i hope
You enjoy the accoutrement
here in the house.
Welcome, if you need anything at all.
I hope you find it.
And you see that they nod curtly.
- I go, we're all bitty folks.
- Your parents look at
you and gyro looks at you
And they go, yeah, we're all bitty folk.
We hope that if you need anything,
You come and ask politely for
it, because we're neighbors
Now and that's what neighbors do.
And you see that the stewards nod.
And say, of course, my
apologies, if you need
Anything at all, come ask us
and we'll be glad to help.
And you see that they scurry away.
You see that gyro pats you on the back,
Master buttons goes, young one.
Hell yeah.
- Hell yeah.
- Hell yeah.
- Hell yeah.
- A utopia is born that
day here in the house.
Tik teks and heapers
are living side by side.
And you see that a little
flag is placed on top
Of the watermelon in
the heap to commemorate
What once was there and
a point of pilgrimage
For any moocher to travel
to, to meditate atop
The mountain and dwell on
the deeds of the heroes
Of watermelon monks and tech experts past.
What's everybody else
doing on this beautiful day.
This side of the table?
- You're good.
- Okay.
Boomer is in the black box
theater and he's addressing,
There's actually people
in the seats and he steps
Up on the little stage
area and says, thank you
All for being here.
You know, i thank you for your
interest in my new upcoming
Musical that i've been workshopping
over the last day or so.
And of course i can finance
most of it myself now,
But you know, it's always
good to have financial support
And to kind of show you what
It is you're going to be doing.
I have worked up one of
the songs from the musical.
I'd like to share it with you.
- And then the whole place burns down.
- Do you have lyrics written down?
- Yes!
- Scene.
- Somebody, somebody
in the audience yells,
Did he just say they got free butt?
- I have to pay for my butt.
- We're workshopping, we're workshopping.
- How come he gets free butt?
- Oh my gosh.
- The crowd erupts into applause.
You see that a bunch of
these bugs come over,
They've got like crazy tattoos
Of like thorns and thumbtacks and stuff.
You see that one of these guys comes
over, he's this huge f*cking
Like c*ck guy, he comes over and goes,
Hey man, i was really picking
up on when you were putting
Down out there.
I just got out of the
slammer a couple of days ago
And i'm kind of looking to like get
On the straight and narrow.
Do you teach acting classes
or do you offer,
I don't know, any advice programming
You're holding auditions recently?
- Does a mouse sh*t in the floorboard?
- That's my guy right there, man.
- You're in pal.
We've got alright, we've got
observation class on mondays,
- We've got
- Fade out.
- Star wipe.
- You fade from there.
You, the quarters have
financed a moocher utopia,
A brand new black box theater.
And what's agnes doing
with her roll of quarters?
- I think agnes gave her
roll of quarters to the team.
She said, you guys can have mine.
It wasn't what it was about for me.
And i think the last we see of her,
She's at a slot machine and scoop brings
Her a little cup of battery
acid and she takes a sip,
And then she takes as
a smoke of her cigarette
And then she pulls, and she hits jackpot
And she smiles and dies.
Oh, nice.
- Oh.
- A flurry of gold and
beads and glitter erupts
From the slot machine.
And in a last puff of sparks and ash,
That's smells of nicotine
and cigarette smoke.
Agnes leaves this mortal plane
And is survived by a legend
that will never fade.
- Hell yeah.
- Hell yeah.
- May i go next?
- Yes. Absolutely.
- So i would like to now
have a flashback scene.
- Yeah.
- Back to when car-Go was first
pulled out of the drainage
Ditch by agnes and by rick.
At this point, it's just rick
and car-Go talking and car-Go
Is reaching the end of the real
plan that they're not going
To reveal to any of the
others just in case.
And he says, yeah
So that's when you turn
in to digginsaurus rex,
You throw the b*mb.
And then our grease, will
use the flame thrower
To set off the b*mb.
That will explode.
That'll knock everyone down.
And then we'll all get to the car.
The air conditioner
will kick in of course.
So we'll pull down the side.
We'll have a lot of emotional moments.
And then that's when then we
got them, 'cause they're gonna
Chase us and we're just
gonna m*rder the sh*t out
Of all of them.
And then i'm gonna transform while felix is inside me
- Okay.
- But don't pass that on to
any of the other members.
Just in case.
And then we'll have the quarters
And you know, you all can use them to buy yourselves
A better life or, you know,
get yourself a big score
Or a one last prize
whatever you all wanna do.
And i'll take the quarters
and i'll do what i'm gonna do.
- And what is that?
- Same thing i've always
done, make my kid happy.
And so then we cut to dylan
walking inside of his tent
And he finds three candy
bars laid out on the floor
And a little bolt,
A little station wagon
sitting next to them.
- Dylan walks in sad and
mopey from the labor day
Barbecue, walks in, i never
get to - Three candy bars.
- And my car-Mo-Bot's back.
And he picks you up.
You see that he scoops
up all three candy bars,
Looks at you and transforms
you out of the station wagon
Into car-Go jones.
Looks at you in his hand and he goes,
You're a real toy?
And he he rushes out of his little tent
And he yells into the window
of max's room, and yells, max
Max, max. Max takes a head phone out.
All the moochers like,
- Shut the f*ck up.
- He goes, what?
And he says, what's the name
Of this car-Mo-Bot again?
And he says, you see that max looks
out, sort of like grumpy
And teenager and he looks
out and sees him and he goes,
Oh, that's his name's car-Go jones.
That's car-Go jones.
And you see that he
says, car-Go jones bought
Me three candy bars.
Max surly teenager that he is, looks at it
And you see his face softens and he goes,
That's just the kind of car-Mo-Bot he is.
I'm glad he got those
for you, i won't tell mom.
And he puts the headphone back on.
Dylan recounts all the
events of his school,
Of what he's looking
forward to in that next year
Of school to you as he
powers through every single
One of the three candy
bars in short order, runs
Around the tent like 20
times in a row and passes out
In a sugar crash holding
you in his little kid
Hand in his tent.
- And i think one last little bit,
We se, car-Go say, and you know rick,
If you ever want to, there's always a room
In the kid's room for you.
- Yes, yes, i'm aware.
Don't, don't try to
spoonfeed me any conclusions though, okay?
This f*cking plan goes
as well as it hopes,
I don't really care where i end up.
- What does rick do?
- Dylan is, had his sugar
binge and just falling asleep
And it's later in the evening
The adults don't wanna wake him yet.
They're trying to clean
up before they wake him up
And suddenly dylan feels a
little poke of little feet
On his face and a giant eye opens
And dylan sees a man in a
tuxedo with a space helmet
On and dinosaur legs and a cape,
And the little man takes
a drag off a cigarette
And says, good morning, you little sh*t.
Let's get weird.
- He, he.
- We're gonna call it there.
- Guys this has been tiny heist.
Thank you so much for watching.
And we'll see you next time.
Take care.
- Bye.
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04x06 - The Great Chase
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A tabletop role-playing game show produced by and broadcast on Dropout and created and generally hosted by Brennan Lee Mulligan as the show's regular Dungeon Master.
A tabletop role-playing game show produced by and broadcast on Dropout and created and generally hosted by Brennan Lee Mulligan as the show's regular Dungeon Master.