(slow ambient music)
(slow orchestral music)
(stoat squeaks)
(slow orchestral music continues)
(bear growls)
(slow orchestral music continues)
(slow orchestral music continues)
(upbeat orchestral music)
- Hello, and welcome back to
Dimension 20, "Burrow's End."
I am your dungeon master
and warren warden,
Aabria Iyengar, and with me
are my mystical mustelids.
Hey, what, I feel like I
changed it in the middle.
- You changed it in the middle
to another one that works.
(group chattering)
Were you considering "mystical
mustelids," 'cause we-
- I was, and then my brain
just kind of did that.
- But now you're gonna have
to do a different one every single time.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Do you have, do you have
eight more stoat puns?
- We're in the pocket, we're doing it.
I guess we're changing this every time.
So say hi, mystical mustelids.
- [Group] Hi, mystical mustelids.
- Mustelids.
- Oh, no. (laughs)
Recap time, so after meeting our family
of stoats within their
ancestral home of the Red Warren
and the outlying camp of the Lukura,
the safety and peace
was suddenly shattered
as a freak dust storm,
carrying with it strange
but not entirely unfamiliar
scents and death swept through.
but not entirely unfamiliar
scents and death swept through.
You all managed to escape
and you currently have
with you (sighs) not really
anyone from your home,
with you (sighs) not really
anyone from your home,
but we do have Olliver
and Teedles, the beacons
of a cult, so you're
doing pretty good, TBH.
I think it's fine, it's-
- It's definitely fine.
- [Aabria] Yeah.
- We're all, this is great, yeah.
- Not really the numbers
I thought you were gonna
have coming into this,
but I think we're doing great.
So why don't we go ahead and,
like, get in and begin.
- Seems worrying, a statement
- [Jasper] For you to make.
- All my friends are dead. (laughs)
- Everyone you've ever known is dead.
- You didn't-
- [Izzy] There's no friends?
- You didn't really
have any friends, honey.
- [Aabria] Wait.
- My mom's my friend.
- The thing is, the
numbers I expected you guys
to kind of walk away
with aren't really there,
but that's okay, let's
just drop back into it
and see how we're doing.
- I'm not gonna examine that.
- [Aabria] No, don't.
- Oh.
- What, what's up?
- Okay.
- Let's begin in the woods.
So you have no heading,
what are you gonna do?
- I've climbed down from the tree
and relay everything that I saw.
It's like, this thick nasty air has been,
It's like, this thick nasty air has been,
is following us, in a
way, it's pushing us out.
We can't go back home,
everyone is, is gone.
- Where are we gonna live?
- Well, there was a time
before our family found the burrow,
and they made it long enough
to find the Red Warren,
and so we're gonna do what they did
and we're gonna wait long enough
to find another place to live.
We're gonna go search in the woods
and we'll just be together-
- Find other critters
and k*ll them and take their home, yes.
Very good, Tula.
- The way that we found the Red Warren is
that it used to be
rabbits that lived there,
and your grandmother, when
she was a very little girl,
and her parents and grandparents
found the Red Warren
and they hunted the rabbits,
and that was the first food
they found in that place,
and then that's where we all lived.
So somewhere out there in the woods,
here in the high ground,
away from that bad air,
we're gonna find a place just like that
and we're gonna be able to
make it into a home, okay?
- But how do we know that
where we go next isn't gonna have bad,
bad dust everywhere and Blue
and monsters and things
that everybody talks
about but doesn't say what it is?
- Well, we're just gonna
have to be very careful,
and we're gonna have to look hard
and try to find a place that's safe.
- I do think there is
things that we can do.
I think I've seen these creatures,
this force that you spied
from the tree before,
and, well, I've seen things
that can affect these creatures.
It is possible that we could
maybe even once drive them out.
That was the whole basis of my,
of the Lukura, (laughs)
what remains of it.
of the Lukura, (laughs)
what remains of it.
But I see no reason why
we couldn't do the same.
- Thorn, I'm just, I'm confused
because we can't even touch it.
How do we fight something we can't touch?
- The air, no, the lightning.
- I don't know if Viola's
ever seen lightning.
- Give me an arcana check.
- 12.
- Thorn has told you the story of this,
but you've never seen the conditions
that he experienced on that night,
lightning, not coming down from the sky,
but up from the ground
and between creatures
of unfathomable size.
You've seen sparks and bits of lightning
when Thorn truly focuses,
moments of brilliance
that have inspired a lot of the worship
that's happened in and
around him and the cult,
but the scale of the thing that you saw
from the top of the tree,
you, like, trying to figure out, like,
you can't fathom the size
of the thing that's coming.
So it's sort of, isn't really lining up
with what he's saying.
- Hmm.
Viola I guess is kind
of falling into herself.
Like, she's a little scared
because this is, it was a story at first,
and now it's tangible, or intangible,
and that is very confusing to her.
So I guess she looks
to her mother for any,
Mama, I'm scared.
- Well, that's perfectly normal.
- Great advice. (laughs)
(group laughs)
Good talking to you, Mama.
Great.
- Well,
well, we just gotta push on through.
- But I understand why you're scared.
I understand why we're all scared,
but in the same way that
we've seen these creatures,
I have seen them be repelled.
I've seen them be pushed
back by this force,
this lightning, this magic,
and all of us possess it
in some way, shape, or form.
Perhaps it's not lightning,
but it's still some brilliance
that you all possess.
- How many of these
monsters have you repelled?
- That's an interesting
question. (chuckles nervously)
- It's okay, you can tell
'em, we're all family here.
- That's right, son, you
tell us how many monsters
that you've repelled.
- One, probably, kind of.
- There was, like, another
one there, I think.
There was, like, two.
- Yeah, there were probably,
yeah, probably two.
Probably two.
- Two.
- [Jasper] (whisper) Thank you, Olliver.
- [Aabria] (whisper) Yeah.
- So you have the power
to repel these monsters.
- I'm not saying that,
well, the whole point
of the Lukura was that
we were to (sighs) try
and ascend towards this power,
keep training, getting
better, getting stronger.
- It's a goal, it's an aspiration.
- [Jasper] Yes.
- All right, so I think
that that's a very worthy aspiration,
and that before that,
we will probably have
to find shelter from rain.
We will have to find food
so that we do not go hungry,
and there are a number of
things that are very dangerous
that are not creatures
or monsters or the Blue.
There are some very simple
things that are dangerous,
like going cold and going hungry,
and we need to find shelter and safety.
- [Jasper] Yes.
- Mrs. Tula, that is what,
before we got to where we were camped,
that's what we did, we are good.
- We were quite good at it, yeah. (laughs)
- [Aabria] At surviving-
- We moved around and
we would find shelter where needed
and food where we needed-
- I didn't mean to insinuate
that you weren't, Thorn-
- [Aabria] No, not at all.
- I just-
- I'm trying to be reassuring,
I don't know how to,
(whisper) is this working?
- (whisper) This is great.
- [Aabria] This is great.
- I think everyone's just-
(group chattering)
- If it's all right with you, Thorn,
I think that the best thing for the cause
is for us to be safe.
- Absolutely.
- And so if we know of any place
where these monsters are
not that we can recover
and get on our feet
and make sure that the children are safe
and that they have a place to rest,
then that is of the highest priority,
and I think we're all
in agreement on that.
- Yes, I couldn't agree more.
It was merely trying to
provide a sense of hope
after such a tragic encounter,
but, yes, personally,
after such a tragic encounter,
but, yes, personally,
I suggest we keep moving
up to higher ground.
I think the further away we can get
from what's just happened, the better.
But I open up to the group,
and we have an excellent tracker
to help us get to that higher ground.
- I'm, like, sitting in a tree.
(group laughs)
- We have an excellent
track, trackers, you know,
where is Jaysohn?
- Make a stealth check.
(group laughs)
- 19.
- In a rare moment of quiet,
Jaysohn has disappeared.
- Aabria, I have a request.
- [Aabria] Sure.
- So I have this ability as a paladin-
- Oh, talk to me, okay.
(group laughs)
- [Brennan] Called "Divine Sense,"
and it lets me-
- Oh, that's so interesting.
- And it lets me detect
celestials, fiends, and undead,
but I can't help but notice
that we're at a setting
that probably doesn't have those.
- [Aabria] Correct.
- Can I use divine sense
to detect my children?
(group laughs)
- I think maybe Jaysohn counts as a fiend,
like a little bit.
(group laughs)
- [Erika] Hellions.
- Can I just be with him,
like, we're just up in a tree?
- Up in a tree,
- [Aabria] Give me a stealth check.
just, like, doing cat's cradles.
- Stealth? 12.
- Yeah.
Yeah, you're sitting
in the knot of a tree.
What does it look like as
Tula activates this ability?
(slow ambient music)
- Jaysohn's right here.
- Thank you, sweetie.
It looks like that.
(group laughs)
- Thank you so much, a moment
k*ller, we f*cking love it.
(group laughs)
- I'm right here.
- Sweethearts, do you want
to come down from the tree?
We're gonna talk about
where we want to go next.
- Not really.
- [Jasper] Oh. (laughs)
- Come on down.
- I think we should be up in the tree.
- We're okay being up in the tree,
thank you.
- I think
we should all live up in the tree.
- Maybe we should live up in the tree-
- Control your children.
- We don't need-
- It's kind of nice up here.
- We're just sort of saying
how we feel-
- I think a bird
used to live up here.
(Aabria laughs)
- A bird used to live up there?
- [Siobhan] Yeah.
- I'm gonna go up in
the tree with my kids.
- [Aabria] Sure, sure, sure.
- (whisper) Mom.
- Yeah?
- Is Thorn bad?
(light, plucking string music)
- No, Thorn's not bad.
- (whisper) Are you sure?
- No, Thorn is not bad,
Thorn is trying to help.
- No, Thorn is not bad,
Thorn is trying to help.
And sometimes when people try to help,
they set very lofty goals.
That's all, so unless,
is there are hole big enough in the tree
that you found that could fit all of us
and food and moss?
- Oh.
- I don't know,
but I feel like we
shouldn't be on the ground
because the ground is
where everybody dies.
- [Siobhan] Right.
- Unfortunately, sweetie, there are owls
and birds in the forest that
can come up into the trees.
So the ground's not safe,
but the trees are not a permanent answer.
- Can we eat birds?
- It's hard to eat birds,
hard to catch birds.
- I think I could do it.
- Jaysohn's really fast.
- Well, then let's go
find some bird nests.
I don't see any here.
Let's head back down and
join the rest of the family.
- They might have eggs.
- Yeah, (gasps) I love eggs.
- [Izzy] Me too.
- Let's go find some eggs, come on.
- Mom?
- [Brennan] Yeah.
- I've been trying to
figure out what's going on
for, like, a really long time,
and it finally happened, like,
I thought that something
really bad was gonna happen,
and it did, and I wasn't able
to figure out what happened,
and nobody says whatever happened,
except our dad is dead, but, like,
all of the adults say all the time that,
like, a big thing is gonna happen,
or did happen all the time,
and it's sort of the-
- Yeah, they did say that.
- The most frustrating thing ever,
and it sort of makes me feel like,
it hurts to be awake because
it's all I think about,
and there are never any answers.
- She doesn't really sleep.
- And the people just say,
like, things-
- I don't think she really sleeps.
- People say "things",
"creatures", "Blue", "monsters",
and it's like, oh, my God.
- She really wants to know.
She talks about it all the time.
- Just say what's going on.
And then it's, like,
finally the bad thing comes,
and it's just the air,
it's not even, like,
a monster or something
that you can see-
- Yeah, it's, like,
it shouldn't be that scary-
- That, like, kills you,
it's just air, and then it's like,
I listen to what everybody's
saying all the time,
but it just feels like actually none
of the adults even know
what they're talking about.
It's like, oh, nobody has
actually ever seen it,
except for maybe Dad, and he's dead.
- He's so dead.
- So it's, (frustrated stammers)
you know, and-
- Sweetie, breathe, breathe.
Can you take a deep breath?
Can you take a deep breath
in through your nose?
One long breath in through your nose,
(deep breath in)
and then out through your mouth.
(tight breath out)
Not that tight, a little bit
softer than that. (inhales)
(big exhale)
That's all, great.
- (whisper) Your breath smells so bad.
- (whisper) Shut up!
- Don't tell your sister to shut up.
- (silently) Shut up!
- Let's go-
(Crew laughs from offset)
Let's all go back down, and tonight,
you are owed a conversation
about all these things.
So we'll talk about them tonight, okay?
But let's go, it's not safe
where we are right now.
- Lila, do you trust everything
your mother just told you?
- Implicitly.
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] Okay.
- Whoa.
- Meanwhile, down on the ground,
I'm, like, real close to Thorn.
I'm gonna do an insight check.
- [Aabria] Looking for what?
- Just having your mother-in-law just-
- Doesn't matter, it's
an eight, it's nothing.
- Mama's just trying to sniff you out.
- Yeah, I am literally. (sniffs)
- [Aabria] Oh.
- There you go.
- Hi, miss-
- Shh!
- Shh, definitely-
- Interesting.
- Definitely don't.
- Yeah, she's very close to you,
and it's very weird.
- I know, it's fine.
Don't worry about it.
- I'm feeling a way-
- I'll let you know, I'll let you know.
- (silently) It's okay, she gets close.
- Yeah, but, I mean.
- Do you, you know what that was.
- I don't know if I know what that was,
but I know about the lightning,
and I know that you deeply
care about my daughter.
So right now, I'm going to
leave the very precarious fate
of this remainder of the
Warren in your hands.
- Mm-hmm.
- (intense whisper) Don't f*ck it up.
- Don't plan on it.
(group laughs)
(Jasper sighs)
(group laughs)
- That's honestly her being really loving
and inviting, you know.
- I really think I made a
breakthrough with your mother.
That was amazing, did you see that?
- I did see it.
- [Jasper] Yeah, okay, she-
- But I've also-
- She said the word trust-
- [Rashawn] The word trust, but also-
- She said the word trust.
- Right, but you didn't, I'm sorry,
I'm not in this conversation.
- It's okay, come in.
- Olliver, no, Olliver's like,
Me and Teedles are gonna,
we're just gonna go around-
- Go around to the other,
see the rest of the,
see the rest of the stoats
that are still around.
- Just two.
- Oh that's just two, everybody else-
- Did the badger make it out?
- Yeah, you guys saw
the badger sprinting off
in a direction.
(group chattering)
- All right, all right,
and the two of you.
- Hi.
- [Erika] Hi.
- Hi.
- Toodles.
- (offended) Mm-mm.
- Well.
- You can make the effort.
(slow orchestral music)
- [Aabria] She's not my mom.
- Teedles.
- Tiddles, then.
- Still not there.
- [Erika] All right, well,
that's close enough for you.
- Okay, Eva, that's how that feels.
- Oh, you think that you're bothering me
by mispronouncing my name?
I've been through more winters
than all of you combined,
and I lived through it,
and if you want to live
through the rest of these with my family,
you'd better make sure that
you're doing what my daughter
and her husband are
telling you to do, hmm?
- Make an intimidation check.
- Can I give the help action?
(group laughs)
- Do you want to?
It will be obvious.
- Yeah, I'm like, "Hmm."
- Do it.
- Yeah. (laughs)
- [Izzy] Yeah, yeah.
- 28.
- You sh*t yourself.
- Yeah.
- Teedles looks from you and
at you, and there is a note,
there's no roll for
this, of utter betrayal,
that she was trying to stand
up for you, and looks back.
At a 28, you see her,
like, her ears pin back,
and she steps back and
slides behind Olliver,
her partner.
Okay.
- You too, Gulliver.
- You are very good at
keeping your family alive
in a hole in the ground,
and we survived for as
long as we did out here,
but go ahead.
And you see that, like,
in the sort of dynamic
that is forming, the two
people that were closest
with you are now sort of
stepping out and away,
and are very much putting themselves
on the fringe of this group
and absolutely not making
eye contact with Ava.
She is terrifying.
- [Jasper] If I can, I'll
sidle up to the two of them.
I realize this is all extremely strange,
and I owe you both an apology.
- For what?
- You've been nothing but loyal,
and I'm asking you to do something
which feels utterly against everything
that we have used to
survive this entire time,
and I completely understand.
I am trying so desperately
to keep us all together,
I am trying so desperately
to keep us all together,
to not cause rifts, and they are,
they have a completely
different understanding
and see the world so differently to us
that if we lead with our full selves
and show every card all at once,
they'll bolt, they'll
run, and people will die.
And I've already been responsible
for the death of so many,
and I can't let that happen again,
and I appreciate that I've hurt you,
and that you have suffered
through great loss,
but I need you now more than ever,
not to be my beacons,
but to be there for me,
and I will do everything I can
to keep everyone here safe.
- Olliver's gonna reach
out and kind of grab you
by the back of your neck and, like,
lean his forehead into yours.
They, if they knew what we saw that night,
I don't care if a mom is mean to you.
That old woman has seen some sh*t.
We get it and we respect it,
but if they think that
all of the knowledge
that they need to survive will live
and die within their little family-
- I know all of this,
but the thing is, we can't show them.
If we could-
- Why?
- [Jasper] How, how do you-
- Every time you've showed them, (sighs)
people follow you, they listen to you.
How can you not convince the people
that you think are your family of a truth
that dozens of stoats and creatures
that we couldn't even
communicate with understood?
That's you doubting who you are,
and we can't convince you of that.
But sure, whatever it takes.
We're gonna go scout.
We'll let you know if we see anything.
- Don't go far.
- Only as far as we have to.
- I mean it, I can't lose anyone else,
least of all you two.
And I'll, head together,
brighter than the sun,
swifter than the wind.
- Swifter than the wind.
- And I'll give Teedles Guidance.
I felt like Teedles is the one
that's tearing the most, so.
- Yeah, Teedles just pooped a little bit.
(group laughs)
And they're both gonna kind of move out,
and you can hear them sort of
circumnavigating your group,
just trying to get a lay of the land.
- Badger's gone, right?
- [Aabria] Badger's fully gone.
- All right.
- Checking folks over to make sure
that they're doing okay, you know?
- I don't think I can
Lay On Hands myself, but-
- You can lay hands on yourself.
♪ Ah ♪
(Erika laughs)
- I love it when she does that.
- I come back to myself.
- [Aabria] Is that what it looks like?
- Yes, it's very, don't look at me.
(group laughs)
- I need everyone here
to make an arcana check.
- Oh, boy.
(dice rattling)
- 12.
(Nat 1 sound effect)
- Golly, 10.
- 10.
- 12.
- [Rashawn] Mama.
- 14.
- And actually, zero.
(group laughs)
- And actually?
- Woof.
- And actually zero, one
minus one is zero, so.
- [Siobhan] Wow.
- That's the maths.
- [Brennan] Yeah, that's the- (laughs)
- That's the maths.
(group laughs)
- [Izzy] Okay.
- Oh, plural, add it to the list.
- Add it to the list.
- Yeah, adding an 's' to
'math', that's psychotic.
- Oh, right, yeah, sorry, ooh.
- We only have one math in America.
(group laughs)
- And that's the Lord's math.
(group laughs)
- [Izzy] Jesus's math.
- We have multiple maths
and one sport.
- [Aabria] Jesus's calculus, baby.
- That's how we do it.
(group chattering)
- Yeah, we got one sport.
- And two fingers.
(group laughs)
- My 12s and the 14.
(slow music)
You all see in this moment
as Viola sort of reaches
You all see in this moment
as Viola sort of reaches
and touches herself, maybe
it's a trick of the light.
It's the middle of the day and
the sun's been weirdly hazy
because of the dust, but
you could almost swear
that you see a sheen of blue sort of move
across her fur as she heals herself.
- What's everybody staring at?
- Auntie V, you turned blue.
- Lila's eye is twitching.
- Well, I didn't do that.
I just wanted to feel
better, I don't, is this-
- I, like, go up and,
like, looking in her fur.
- Oh, you just
getting in there?
- And her paws.
It's like.
- Oh my God.
Your little fingers, what
are you doing, Lila, Lila.
- Sweetie, it's all right,
it's the same thing I do,
it's just, she was just licking herself
'cause she was injured,
that's all.
- You don't turn blue!
- [Brennan] What?
- You turned blue!
- No one turned blue.
- (out of character) I got a Nat one.
(as Tula) No one turned blue.
(group laughs)
- Yeah, she definitely turned blue.
- Auntie turned blue.
- She turned blue.
- You children are out of line.
Everyone's excited.
- Yes, everyone's excited and everyone's-
- Don't tell tales.
- Lila, if you're concerned, I mean,
I could touch myself again
and see if it happens.
- Yeah, do it again.
- Okay.
(music crescendos)
(group laughs)
- Do you have anymore healing
you could to do to yourself?
- You added a dance!
- [Brennan] What was that little shimmy-
- You added a dance that time.
(group chattering)
And you didn't do a dance the first time.
- No, I'm, well, I don't-
- [Siobhan] It didn't happen that time.
- No, I only have, you know,
20 or so hit points to regain,
so I'm all right.
(group chattering)
- Did you see it?
- No, not that time, the second time-
- Did you see it, did you
see it the first time?
- [Siobhan] The first time, yeah.
- I saw it.
- We can do experiments when
we have a safe place to go.
- What did it look like?
- Mama, we have to go.
- Is there a link, is there, like,
a strong link that I feel like,
sensing that magic and sensing, like,
the blue, and then-
- Yeah.
- Some of the lightning-
- Oh, no, you 100%, like, you understand
that this is the same thing.
- [Jasper] Yeah, okay, perfect.
- Thorn, this is, yeah, so what is this?
- I think perhaps, I think that
Tula is making a good point.
Perhaps we should move,
and when we find a suitable place,
I've already, Olliver and
Teedles have already gone ahead
to potentially find somewhere
that might be safer than standing out
in the open like this,
and when we get there,
perhaps we can discuss
all of this more openly.
But I think it's encouraging,
and I'll sort of give you a little smile.
- Okay.
- [Aabria] Jaysohn, give
me a perception check.
(dice rattling)
- 19.
- With a 19, as you're kind of
watching all of this happen,
like, your ear just sort of flicks back
and you hear something, a thump.
(slow thumping)
- Did you hear that?
- What's over your shoulder.
- Hmm?
(leaves rustling)
- Hear what?
- There's something behind me.
- Something behind you?
- Bless on my kids and myself.
(slow thudding)
- I'm, like, up on, like a meerkat.
(Aabria laughs)
- I'm gonna cast Shield
of Faith on myself.
- Whoa, just busting out all
the magic, yeah, let's go.
- As I'm in my favored terrain,
am I able to just do a quick scan
of the floor to see if I
see any tracks or anything
of something potentially
that could be in the area?
- I would love that.
Go ahead and give me (sighs)
investigation or survival.
- [Brennan] Help action.
- Thank you, let me see.
Yeah, I can get, apparently it says
I can get exact numbers, sizes,
and how long ago they've passed
through the area apparently.
- [Aabria] Sure
This check is going to be-
- With the help action?
- [Aabria] Yeah.
- Ooh, (cheers) there we go, 24.
- You immediately go into that, like,
"What did I miss and why am I not hearing,
like, anything, like,
from Olliver and Teedles?"
And you go and your sort
of eyes move to the ground,
and you pick it up, you've been walking
through a, like, dense, like,
not wet or sodden ground,
through a, like, dense, like,
not wet or sodden ground,
but there are tracks here.
The biggest ones, there is one
very large creature,
a bear has been moving
around here, and recently.
And with a 24, there's
something very strange that,
a predator that big would move on its own
and other things would
give it a wide berth,
but you see tracks of other creatures,
smaller, a little bit smaller than you all
in and around those tracks,
and it looks like they're as
fresh as the bear's tracks,
which were here maybe an hour ago,
stomping grounds, not passing through.
And then you all hear
another stomp. (snaps)
- I think we all need to, we should hide.
We should immediately, we
don't know the direction
they're coming on, so find somewhere,
seek shelter, and we'll try
to assess the situation,
but I think something
might be using this area
as a stomping ground.
So immediately, everyone,
low to the ground
and cover yourself with
some moss, things like that.
- What's nearby?
- You have a bunch of ferns and low brush.
There's high trees everywhere.
- [Jasper] Into the brush.
- Yeah, can I get back up the tree-
- Or up high, if you feel
more comfortable doing that,
but let's all do that right
now, and then we'll assess.
- Up the tree.
- All right.
- [Jasper] Okay.
- If we're all going up the tree,
I'm gonna make sure,
I'm gonna be rear guard
and make sure that everybody's up.
All right, everybody up.
- I'll be on the ground,
just 'cause I don't feel,
I don't feel comfortable-
- [Aabria] Okay, so we have ground-
- I'm on the ground.
- Up?
- Yeah, up, up, up, behind
my niece and nephew.
- Okay, everyone going up a tree,
I'm gonna need an acrobatics check.
(slow music)
(Izzy claps)
(Chimes for a natural 20)
- Natural 20?
- Yeah.
- [Group] Ey!
- I was like, that's eitehr really good or
was really, really bad!
- Yeah, I can't tell.
There's no way to know.
- I got an 11.
- 11.
- 12.
- [Aabria] 11, 11, 12.
- Nat one.
(Aabria gasps)
- [Group] No!
- [Izzy] No!
- Perfect.
- Can I catch her on my natural 20?
- [Rashawn] Lila!
- Do you want to?
- Yeah, if I can do that.
If she's gonna fall like a dead bird.
- Yeah, like, you move
up the tree so easily
that everyone kind of looks around,
and as they're saying,
"We should go up a tree,"
you sort of disappear from the frame,
as you are now up the tree.
(Izzy sputters)
- No fair, you cheated.
- What, what, there's no game.
- You cheated.
- And as Viola, like,
scampers up to follow,
you see her, like, miss,
and some of the bark
of this tree sort of falls
away as she's climbing.
I'll allow you to grab her
so she does not fall and take damage,
but you are going to
be in the line of sight
as the bear moves into view.
Bring out the map.
(group exclaiming)
- Oh, no!
- Bring 'em out-
- Oh, no.
- Bring 'em out.
- That was terrifying.
- Okay, so we've got Thorn
and Ava on the ground.
We have Lila holding up her Aunt Viola,
and I believe Jaysohn
and his mother made it without incident,
as a massive, lumbering brown bear-
- [Izzy] Brown?
- Yeah, that's brown.
- It's brown.
It's a brown bear.
- [Erika] That's gross.
- I thought it was green grass.
- Oh, it's because-
- [Aabria] No, there's
green, like, lights.
- Oh, I thought it was covered in grass.
- No, it's fur, you can
give him a little pet.
- [Izzy] I was like-
(group chattering)
- [Aabria] You want to touch that boy?
- Don't pet it,
it feels gross.
- It feels nasty.
- [Aabria] You want to touch that boy?
- It feels really gross.
- I don't want to be here anymore.
- It feels like my old roommate's hair
from when she used to bleach it.
- Oh, that's so real.
(group agreeing)
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Okay, so Ava,
(dramatic orchestral music)
as you are staring at
this massive creature,
like, slowly shoving your daughter
and granddaughter up into
the safety of the tree,
a creature pops its little head out,
and you see just a little
chipmunk looking up at you.
And as you make eye contact,
it gives just a little smile,
and burbles of blood sort of sh**t
from its cheeks, it was storing for later,
dripping down its front,
as it's going to reach out and grab you.
I need you to make an
athletics or acrobatics check,
your choice, and I need all
of you to roll initiative.
- Oh.
- Oh.
- Here we go, here we go.
(group rolling dice)
- So I get a plus two to initiative.
(group mumbling calculating
their initiative)
- I got a 23.
- Golly, let's go.
- 12.
- [Aabria] 12 for Tula.
- 22.
- [Aabria] Oh.
- 20.
- [Aabria] Ooh.
- Seven.
- And "Vee-ola?"
- 11.
- "Vai-ola", I'm gonna change
how it's pronounced every time, all right.
- "VI"-ola.
(everyone individually
over-enunciating 'Viola')
- Viola.
- There you go.
- [Brennan] Viola, Viola.
- [Aabria] Populate.
- It feels like a wind or a
tunnel of air coming from-
(group emulating breathiness)
- (breathy) Viola.
(Brennan groans breathily)
(group laughing)
- That's a good way-
- It's like somebody
pressing down on a dead body.
- You pronounce the name
like you've been hit
with a tranquilizer dart.
You're like- (slap) (groans)
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] Truly terrible.
- [Brennan] (whisper) I bet if we
get in the bear, there's candy.
- So this little chipmunk,
this blood-soaked chipmunk,
lunges out towards you, what'd you get?
- I got a 21 for acrobatics check.
Where is he coming from,
where did it come from?
- You were standing by the tree,
and this chipmunk just
sort of appeared beside you
while you were staring at
the bear and trying to push.
- Oh, so I go. (grunts)
- Oh, you didn't beat me with a 23.
You actually see this little
chipmunk lunges towards you,
and, yeah, as you get grabbed
by a chipmunk and dragged-
- What the f*ck?
- To the back of the bear.
And all of you watch as-
- [Siobhan] Grandma!
- Your grandmother
disappears inside the bear.
- What?
- What?
- [Aabria] Yeah, why
don't we just go ahead
and open this bad boy up?
(group members exclaiming)
- The bear opens?
(group screaming)
Oh, my God.
- Oh!
(Erika laughs)
(slow electronic music)
(bear roars)
(chipmunk chirps)
There are evil squirrels in here.
- So this is sort of like your three kids
in a trench coat, but-
- [Aabria] Yes.
- [Izzy] Wait-
- [Siobhan] Oh, my God,
the heart is beating.
- [Aabria] Oh, yeah.
- [Siobhan] No.
- [Jasper] What?
- [Aabria] Get in there.
(Erika shrieks)
- So this is why you emailed
us a trigger warning?
- A little bit, yeah.
(group laughs)
I was in a meeting and Rick went,
"You must desperately send an email."
Go ahead, touch it, get in there.
- The heart is beating.
- The heart is beating.
- Oh, it's squishy!
It's squishy, oh, my God!
Oh, I can feel it moving, oh, my God!
- Can I say, the worst part of this bear?
- [Aabria] Yeah?
- The tactical movement
dots painted on the inside.
- [Aabria] Yep.
- That makes me feel not good.
- [Aabria] Welcome to
the size that you all are
in these terrifying woods.
(chipmunk chitters)
So, first up, we've got Jaysohn. (laughs)
- [Siobhan] Can I just go home?
- [Aabria] Jaysohn, you're up in a tree.
You see your grandmother disappear
inside a large brown bear.
- [Siobhan] Great.
- Oh, if you think
I didn't have a background for this, yeah.
- Oh.
- Oh, no.
- No!
- It's like Magic School Bus.
- [Siobhan] I would like-
(Aabria laughs)
I would like to jump, how far can I jump?
Am I allowed to jump?
How far am I, tree to bear?
(Aabria laughs)
What's the, what's the-
- I will say your tree
to bear is probably,
this thing is pretty huge,
so it's probably only
10 or 15 feet relatively
to get onto the top of the bear.
- [Siobhan] Okay, that's-
- And you see three points of entry,
the one that your
grandmother disappeared to,
one on the other side, and then one
just a little bit on the side-
- And then where's the tree?
Is it to this side of the bear?
- [Aabria] Yeah, it's, like, right here.
- [Siobhan] Great, so I'll
go in through this hole.
I'll try and get in through
this hole right here.
- Beautiful.
It's time to meet your mini.
- Yay!
- [Aabria] It's Jaysohn, whoa!
(group cheering for the first PC mini)
- [Siobhan] It's little Scrappy-Doo.
- [Aabria] Yes.
- [Aabria] My little guy.
- [Siobhan] Yeah.
- [Aabria] So when you come in,
let's put you right there,
right, put a little tac.
- As I watch my son jump into a bear
through an open wound,
my soul shoots out of
my a*s straight to hell.
- Yup, yup.
(audience laughs)
And I'm gonna give you
the rest of your, like,
30 feet of movement once you get inside.
- And I go, It's okay, Mom.
This is how he would have wanted to die.
(group laughs)
- And I yell, "Grandma!" and
then I'm gonna bonus action,
use a ki point to activate
my Arms of the Astral Self.
- Amazing, beautiful.
- Do I have an attack action left?
Do I have an action left?
- You do.
You still have your full action left.
- Okay, great, I'm gonna
move over to this guy,
and I'm going to try and
attempt to grapple him.
- Oh, okay, you have to beat a 12?
(Siobhan laughs)
- I rolled a critical failure.
- Oh, no.
- No.
- This guy's covered in f*cking blood.
- You literally, yeah-
- Oh, you're so slippery.
What have you done with my grandma?
- And you look over and you can sort of,
like, within this body, you
can see a straight shot across
as your grandmother is being held,
but not actively harmed in this moment,
as all of these other
chipmunks start emerging out
of spaces inside of this bear
and looking around and locking
eyes on you, all right.
- Okay, that's it,
that's my turn.
- Okay.
Ava, you're up next in my
bear, and Lila, you're on deck.
(Erika growls)
- And I straighten myself
up to my full height,
and I pull up my walking stick,
which is a raccoon baculum,
and I start, I wield it
with both hands, (growls)
and I fly into a rage.
- [Aabria] Yes.
- And as I fly into a rage,
fanning out from me are the spirits
of all of our dead fore-mothers,
generations of powerful stoats
that fan out in spectral forms
and surround this creature here.
- [Aabria] Yes.
(sloshing sound as camera zooms in)
- And I attack him with reckless disregard
for my own safety, so I am
doing a Reckless Attack.
- [Aabria] All right,
attack with advantage.
- And
that would be a
22.
- Oh, absolutely hits.
- All right, and then
that's gonna be a 12.
- [Aabria] Oh.
- So that's a 12, so I
smack it right on the head,
(Grunt)
(Thud)
and I also am going to use my years-
years on the b*ttlefield
to use a Menacing Attack.
He has to do a wisdom
saving throw and beat a 14.
- Okay, let's give it a shot.
(dice rattling)
With a natural 18.
This chipmunk that you see now is a girl.
You'll see the naming
convention in a second.
- [Siobhan] Oh, no.
- See, like, sort of
gets stared down by you,
just kind of quirks her head, (chirps)
and a little more blood
dribbles out of her mouth.
- [Izzy] Ugh.
- All right, but she takes
six more points of damage.
- You put 18 points into this chipmunk,
breaking the grapple
and sort of freeing
yourself in this moment.
And you look out and
you see within this bear
that there are more, and
they are sort of starting
to clamor out of holes
and pockets and organs.
- But we're not even scared of the bear.
- You could be, you could decide.
It's, in fact, your turn,
so what do you want to do?
- Oh, well, yeah, I guess right
now, I'm scared of the bear
'cause I don't know that there's
a little army of chipmunks,
and it looks like they have little drums,
which is very fun.
- It's their little letters
so we know who they are.
- I'm just gonna look at my mom and go-
(silent) Mom, what do I do now?
- I think my face is
inscrutable right now.
I am preparing to dive
after Jaysohn into the bear.
- And I just go, "What do I do?"
- Stay here, stay here, stay here.
- No.
- [Brennan] Stay here.
- Dive.
- [Izzy] No!
(group laughs)
I go after her.
- I mean, you go before her,
so what are you gonna do? (laughs)
- I think I see her being
like, "I'm gonna go,"
and I go, "Okay," and
I go in front of her.
- [Aabria] Okay.
(Brennan screams)
- Scream even more-
- Do you want to
dive in in the same direction
that Jaysohn sort of erupted
in, or do you want to dive
into the hole that Ava jumped through?
Or do you want to dive in the other hole?
You have so many options.
- [Izzy] What's closest?
- I would say it's equidistant,
just because of the angle
you have, you can get
into either one easily-
- I guess I'll go
in after Jaysohn because that's
what I saw happen, right?
- Yeah, I mean, you saw both.
You saw your grandmother
get pulled into one hole,
and then Jaysohn jumped into another.
- I don't know, Grandma's pretty tough.
- [Aabria] She is pretty tough.
- So I'll, yeah, I'll go after Jaysohn.
- All right, there's your guy.
- Kiddy.
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] And you dive in, you know,
I'm gonna put you on a rib
(slow music)
so you get a little vantage
and you get a look out over everything.
- Okay, and,
(heart beating)
okay, well, can I sneak
attack this chipmunk?
- [Aabria] Oh, yeah, you
still have more movement.
- Yeah, I sneak attack the
chipmunk from up there.
- Do you want to throw your thorns down,
or do you want to, like,
jump in and be in melee?
- Melee, and I'll do Primal Savagery.
- [Aabria] Let's go.
- Is there an amount of
times we can do that,
or we can just do that forever-
- You just do it all the time.
That's just what your claw attack is.
- [Izzy] Okay, cool.
- It's just nasty in the club.
You know what, let's get
these ribs out of here.
So gross, you know what we're doing now.
- Which is crazy, I ate, like,
a half a rack of ribs yesterday.
- [Aabria] Oh, no!
- I was like.
♪ We made it nasty ♪
- [Jasper] It's like, mm-hmm,
- Oh, this is-
(Players praising the battle map)
- It's so disgustingly beautiful.
- [Siobhan] Yeah.
- Incredible job. (claps)
- [Aabria] It's so good.
- You guys, they really
snapped on this map,
this is incredible.
- And nastiest mini yet.
- [Aabria] The nastiest map.
- "Mini."
(Aabria laughs)
- It's sort of a maxi, if you will.
- [Siobhan] Yeah.
- Go ahead and make an attack roll for me.
- Okay.
- Let's see what's
happening back here, okay.
- [Siobhan] Yeah.
(Brennan and Jasper trading "wow"s
(Izzy stammers)
- 18.
- [Rashawn] Hell, yeah.
- Beautiful, absolutely hits,
so go ahead and roll your
one D10 for your claw attack.
- I say, Wait, be careful,
they're really slippery,
like, I mean, I hit them
for a bunch already,
but he's really slippery.
(group chattering)
(dice rattling)
- Five, two, seven, 12, 14.
- Damn.
- Beautiful.
- 14?
- 14, yes.
- 14 points.
- [Rashawn] Come on, Lila.
- So let's just go ahead and
reveal that these are named
via Chipmunks, Chipettes, and Chippendale.
So Simon is gonna take
how many points of damage?
- Oh, that's Brittany.
- [Aabria] Yeah, that's Brittany. (laughs)
- [Brennan] Oh, wow, okay.
- [Aabria] Cute.
- [Jasper] Yeah.
- Simon takes 14 points of damage.
- [Rashawn] Hell, yeah.
- Okay, you're still here and
you still have a bonus action.
Is there anything else you want to do?
You can dodge, disengage, hide.
- So I don't, like, cast
Insightful Fighting, right, I just-
- Oh, yeah, do you want to
use Insightful Fighting?
- [Izzy] Yeah.
- How does that work?
Tell me.
- Insight against deception.
- Okay, go ahead and
make an insight check.
- [Izzy] My sneak attack.
- [Aabria] You're gonna make it with a 12.
- Okay, yeah, 18.
- [Aabria] All right,
yeah, you have advantage
against Simon forever.
- Cool.
- [Aabria] But you also-
- Oh, only Simon?
- Yes.
- [Izzy] Okay.
- It's the one that
you, like, looked down,
and you're like, "I understand
exactly what you're doing."
You also have half k*lled
this one particular chipmunk
just on arrival.
- Cool.
- [Aabria] So your brother,
who is screaming out,
"Watch out, they're so slippery,"
see you tear in with your
claws and stay there,
and as you stare down Simon,
this thing looks like it wants
to duck back and away from you.
- And I'm like,
Was that cool, Mom?
And I see that she's not there yet.
(group laughs)
- I see it.
- Hurry up, Mom.
- You're doing great.
(Aabria claps)
- [Izzy] Nana.
- Approval, amazing.
Okay, next up, we've got the bear.
So everyone on the inside-
- [Izzy] Uh-oh.
- You feel, now that there's
more action happening
inside the bear, and this
bear is still walking forward,
mind you, it gives a big cough.
So I need everyone to make
a strength saving throw
to hold your footing as
everything inside the bear shifts.
- And that's just if
we're in the bear, right?
- [Aabria] That's just if
you're in the bear already.
- Can I use a wisdom throw,
since I have my arms?
- [Rashawn] (sighs) Baby.
- [Aabria] Sure.
- Great.
- Is this a dex save?
- [Aabria] No.
Strength.
- [Jasper] Oh, strength
- Bless, on both of you, one D4 extra.
- [Jasper] Yes.
- Okay.
- [Aabria] Oh, that's right.
- Nine.
(Aabria laughs)
- Just, you're having
kind of a rough time-
- He's going through a growth spurt
and he doesn't know where
his legs are right now.
- You're already also coated in blood for
my guess is the first time.
- Yes, it's slippery!
- [Aabria] And you slip and fall prone,
but you don't take any damage.
- [Siobhan] Great.
- I f*cked up, I f*cked
up and blew my load early.
- What's wrong, what's wrong?
- Dammit.
- So my little group of
Chipettes are going to act now
as Brittany is going to turn to you,
and takes a multi attack.
So our first one is a claw.
(dice rattling)
Does a 14 hit?
- No.
- Okay, misses with her claw,
but then reaches out
as she opens her mouth,
now finally clear of that blood,
and you see what you can
best describe as, like,
a tongue made of ribbons lashes out
and tries to grapple you again.
I need another athletics
or acrobatics check
to avoid being grappled.
(player faintly speaking)
You have to beat a 14.
- All right, I'm gonna have to athletics,
so, which is a six, I have to beat a 14?
- Yeah.
- [Erika] Okay, so that's-
- And you're raging, yeah?
- Yeah.
- [Aabria] Does that
give you advantage on-
- On strength saving throws.
- And dex, as well.
- sh*t.
It's bad in here.
- It's bad.
- It's a straight ahead
strike, and that's a 19.
- [Aabria] Oh, yeah.
- So, yeah.
- This thing, like, reaches out for you.
Oh, you just stare it down?
How do you avoid it?
- Yeah.
I just stare, I'm like,
Young lady, you put that
tongue back in your mouth.
(group laughs)
- Wow, and weirdly, you've
never been able to communicate
with creatures other than stoats,
and yet, even as this thing
is sort of lashing out
with its strange tongue, it just, (chirps)
and folds it back into its mouth.
- Do you speak stoat?
(Aabria chirps)
- No, but you're just so mean-
- Speak stoat.
(group laughs)
- Are you just gonna command
this thing to be more sentient?
- Be.
- [Aabria] Yeah.
- Be better.
(group laughs)
- And under that damning praise,
we move to Tula, you're up.
- Yeah.
(group cheers)
- [Aabria] There's your little guy.
- Little cutie.
- [Siobhan] She's pretty.
- Little cutie.
(group chattering)
- [Izzy] My mom's cute.
(group chattering)
- [Brennan] How about it?
I'm gonna leap in here.
(slow dramatic music)
- [Aabria] Are you leaping
into the child hole?
- Into the child hole,
going after my children.
Sorry, Mom, I'm going after the kids.
- Don't say "child hole."
(Brennan laughs)
- But don't, (laughs) I'm leaping
into the hole after my children, and
I'm gonna look at them both.
Are either of them injured right now?
- Not at all.
- Okay, my
instinct in this moment leaping in here is
that the bear is still a threat,
that, like, that this, it stays
on the bear being a threat.
So I'm gonna get in here,
seeing my children are unharmed,
and I'm gonna look at both of them and go,
Get out of this bear right now!
Right now, you get out of this bear!
- We're handling it-
- [Brennan] Right now,
you get out of this bear!
- We're handling it, Mom.
- You are not, and then
I'm going to (laughs)-
- You have to give me an
intimidation check. (laughs)
- Okay, here we go,
this is my intimidation.
So help me, I will turn this bear around.
(group laughs)
- The bear groans. (growls)
- Intimidation, it's a 19. (laughs)
- Wow.
- I'm, like, lying on the floor.
I'm fine, Mom, we're
fine, we're handling it.
- Seeing my sister yell at
her kids is very funny to me.
(group laughs)
- I've been trying to impress
how dangerous this world is
for so long, sometimes, listen,
gentle parenting is an aspiration,
but sometimes,
(group laughs)
sometimes you've gotta tell those kids
to get the f*ck out of this bear.
(Aabria laughs)
And I am going to move,
use a bonus action,
which is the Harengon feature, Rabbit Hop,
to jump 10 feet to the
heart and attack the heart.
- [Group] Ooh.
- [Aabria] Nice.
- [Aabria] Clever.
- That's my sister,
right there.
- [Aabria] All right, so you get in.
- [Izzy] Mama.
- [Aabria] Take that big old hop,
and land directly on the heart.
- [Brennan] Yeah.
- Oof.
- Wow.
- Just sort of passively,
go ahead and give me a medicine check.
- [Brennan] Okay.
- Just what do you glean now
that you're moving through this
big old guy?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, and I actually took
proficiency in this,
now I can roll a one, but-
- Oh, perfect.
No, it's gonna be fine.
- That's a two, so I got an eight.
(Aabria laughs)
- It's okay, you don't
have a ton of sense of,
like, the anatomy of a bear, but, like,
as you're standing on the heart,
you see that, like, its
right lung has collapsed,
and you can feel, like, a
breeze coming off of it.
Like, this thing is
already deeply injured,
so this is probably a good idea.
- [Brennan] Okay.
- Go ahead and make an attack.
- Okay.
- [Aabria] On the bear.
(echoing wind)
(dice rattling)
- 17 plus,
sorry, and claws, claws and bite,
so with the way we're using
our claws in this game,
do we add our key'd ability modifier
to damage, as well?
- Yes.
- Okay, great, so I'm
gonna use Primal Savagery.
- [Aabria] Let's go.
- We'll do the D10-
- What does it look like?
I love asking a DM to
paint a word picture.
What does it look like as Tula, like,
shakes off, like, this
scared mother sense,
and, like, begins to rip into this tissue?
- That's an awesome question.
So I think that's exactly it,
is that she's not shaking
off the scared mother sense.
Like, in reflection of
my mom going into a rage,
whatever the rage version of fear is,
is what Tula's experiencing.
So I am in a level of fear
that brings you full circle
from run away to run towards.
- Amazing.
- Like,
that's where we're at, right?
- Love it.
- It's like, I get in here,
I see that that's beating.
I don't know medicine, but
I know that hearts beat,
and that's beating, so
I'm gonna leap on it
and I'm going to roll,
(dice rattling)
I'm also going to Divine Smite.
- [Aabria] Beautiful.
- Ooh, here we go.
(dice rattling)
- That is going to be 10, 17,
plus four is 21 points of damage.
- [Siobhan] Nice.
- Heavy hit.
- Good job, Mom.
- It's like, I bite a hole big enough
(crunching)
to push my head in to keep biting more,
and I'm trying to dig into its
heart to k*ll it (flesh tearing)
as fast as possible.
- [Jasper] Get it.
- Lila is just watching
this, goes. (screams)
(group laughs)
(Aabria claps)
- Lila, you watch your mom,
like, tear and then push,
and there's something about
the way her claws sink in
as she, like, pushes forward,
and you see that flash of blue again,
this one sh**ting across your mom.
(slow music)
(heart beats)
(group laughs as Izzy and Siobhan
gesture silently and excitedly)
- I was entirely correct to
be terrified of your family.
- [Aabria] Yeah.
- [Rashawn] Well.
- Wow, impressive.
(Rashawn giggles)
This entire bear roars
in agony, and at that,
(bear roars)
(heart beats)
it stops moving, like, staggered
by the amount of damage
that was just done to it
in a single, truly a single hit,
and we're gonna go ahead and
reveal the rest of them as-
- Oh, no.
- [Aabria] Yeah-
- What do you mean,
the rest of them?
- The rest of what?
- [Aabria] What are you talking about?
- The rest of what?
- [Aabria] The rest of what?
- Why are you taking them away, and then-
- [Aabria] As the, oops, sorry.
- [Brennan] Don't keep making more bear.
- It is like a Polly Pocket,
it's like a Polly Pocket!
- [Brennan] There's literally
enough bear already.
- [Aabria] Yeah, but
there's also more chipmunks.
There's so much room for-
- [Erika] I love them!
- [Siobhan] Look at that nasty kidney.
- [Erika] That's Theodore, Eleanor.
- [Aabria And Jasper] Yeah.
- [Brennan] Oh, fun fact, bears actually
do eat moss-
- And Alvin.
- [Brennan] To create a
butt plug that keeps them
from pooping while they
sleep during the winter.
- [Siobhan] Wow.
(group audibly takes in that fact)
That is a disgusting fact that you know.
- There we go, thanks,
Brennan, didn't need that.
- A super fun fact, in
fact, that was so nice,
you can hold that for a bear fact.
- [Jasper] There you go, yeah.
- I win.
- [Izzy] What's that, his stomach?
- [Jasper] What did you win, Brennan?
- That is its liver.
- That is really-
- I want to thank the Academy.
(group laughs)
- Yeah, livers are huge.
- Livers are, like, this big.
- If your liver looks like that,
you gotta go to the hospital.
- Yeah, this bear is drinking.
- You gotta stop drinking.
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] But you see, as
this liver sort of ruptures,
and you see the nest within it,
that this is a nest not from
the moss the bear was eating
in better times, but the
nest that the chipmunks
that are parasites inside
this bear have built.
- Mom, we could live here.
- Oh, no. (laughs)
(group laughs)
- Yeah, we just have
to k*ll these chipmunks
and eat them.
- Yeah,
it's like the Warren.
- It's kind of warm, I like it.
- [Aabria] Viola, you are up.
(Rashawn sighs)
- Okay, seeing as my
whole family has jumped
into this bear,
(group laughs)
though I'm inclined to try
to pierce its eyeballs out,
knowing that this thing is
still lumbering on, (sighs)
yeah, I want to, (stammers)
I'm gonna fall down
towards its head, and I'd like
to stab it in the eyeball.
- Oh, you're just going
straight for the bear.
- [Rashawn] Yeah.
- Amazing.
- I love my sister, yes, this
is, great minds, there you go.
- [Aabria] You guys are so synched up.
- From the inside outside,
from the tomb to the womb.
- I'll meet you in the neck.
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] Everyone, meet Viola.
- Wow.
(group chattering)
- [Izzy] She's gorgeous.
(group chattering)
- Oh my gosh, you got a, oh, ooh.
- You look gorgeous,
absolutely gorgeous.
- Oh, my God,
she's so cute, she's just a little flower.
- [Aabria] She's got a little hat.
m*therf*cker
(group adoring the Viola mini)
- So, yes, I want to, I guess-
- Little hat.
(group chattering)
- [Jasper] Up on the nose here?
- Up on the snout snout.
- Up on the snout?
- Getting on the snout?
- Stoat on the snout.
- [Brennan] That is the trailer image,
Schaubach, when we come in.
- [Jasper] Right there, right there.
(bear grumbling)
- Wow, that is bravery incarnate.
- (high-pitched) I'm gonna k*ll you!
- And you're not going my way, okay.
So, yes, I take off my
blade of grass kerchief,
and I fling it out so it becomes rigid,
and I stab for the eye.
- I have clothes, ma'am.
- Yeah. (laughs)
- I have clothes, (laughs) okay, so,
and I get to, I'm gonna also
cast (stammer) Divine Favor.
- What does that do?
- That allows-
- Talk to me.
- Your prayer empowers
you with a divine radiance
until the spell ends.
Your weapon attacks deal
an extra one D4 radiant damage on hit.
- Oh, nice.
- Ooh.
- Ooh, she flew.
- 13?
- [Erika] A 13.
- 13.
- [Aabria] It hits.
- Oh, it does, okay.
- It's a bear, you hit it.
It tries to blink, it
does not blink in time.
- Okay, 13 hits,
so I get a-
- Solid steel contact.
- [Aabria] Yeah, exactly. (laughs)
- A one D4 and a one D8, so eight damage
to its eyeball.
- [Aabria] Eight damage.
(Rashawn imitates a blade hit)
- Oh, wait, isn't that-
- So plus your modifier,
don't you have a-
- With your modifier, as well.
- Which one, which?
- Either dex or strength.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- This is a rapier, so
it would be your dex.
- So plus three to that.
- [Jasper] Plus three.
- [Aabria] Perfect.
- [Jasper] There we go, 11.
(group chattering)
- [Jasper] Heck, yeah.
- [Erika] That's great.
- I go, Your eye is cloudy and nasty.
(squishing and tearing)
(growling)
- And you stab directly into
its pupil and the pupil, like,
constricts around the blade.
You feel it kind of, like, give,
and it blinks, and you're, like,
you're struggling to pull
your blade back from this.
Go ahead and give me a
perception or arcana check.
- And he goes, "What did I do?"
- I was just walking. (laughs)
- I have a-
- [Siobhan] Yet.
- 17.
- It's a 17, as you,
like, stab in, (sighs)
sorry, it's gonna get a little gory,
you sort of see-
- Okay.
- It's going to?
(group laughs)
- Now it's getting a little gory,
so everything else, totally normal.
- [Jasper] Totally vogue, yeah.
- But you see sort of as you, like,
sink your blade in and cut, like,
past its optic nerve, behind its eye,
(group groans in disgust)
a little flash of blue.
- [Jasper] Mmmm-hm.
There's something deep
to it behind its eye,
towards its brain, that
is blue and glowing.
- 'Cause she couldn't see it before
'cause it was on everybody else,
but, like, holding it there, she's like,
it's like a moth to, like,
the blue light thing,
of, like, "I want to go to there.
Oh," and then try to yank the blade back.
- Do you have anything else
you want to do, bonus action?
- Are there any other, I mean,
obviously also the mouth,
I probably don't want to jump into,
are there any other orifices?
- You can make a new one
if you really want to.
So there's three
obvious holes in its side.
- I would. Mmhmm.
- [Aabria] And everything else,
you kind of just gotta make your own way.
- [Siobhan] Eyeball.
- [Izzy] Do it.
- Yeah, I mean, honestly, if I could
cut out that eyeball and-
- [Aabria] Do you want to try to?
- Through, yeah, I would.
- [Jasper] Wow.
(Aabria shrieks)
- I'm an, like, fun, like, first lady,
but also, like, I'm a wild animal.
- Don't you understand,
orifices are all around us.
(group laughs)
♪ Anything's a hole if you believe ♪
- And that's the trailer song.
- Could I use, like, Rabbit Hop to, like,
like, off the snoot, just, like,
push myself through this eyeball?
- Let's call this an athletics check,
and I'll give you advantage
because of the rabbit hop.
Like, you can really throw
your whole little stoat
everything behind it.
- 12.
It was a 13 to pierce the eye.
- I mean, you were already in there.
This is just a matter of,
like, how far through you get.
So I'm gonna do something
just a little bad, then.
- [Jasper] What?
- You don't move all
the way through the eye.
You're still sort of stuck
in the jelly of it, pushing through.
- [Erika] The head comes off, what?
- Now, this, this-
(group shrieks)
Oh, no, oh!
- [Erika] ♪ I'm blue. Da ba dee da ba di ♪
♪ Da ba dee da ba di ♪
- [Aabria] Yeah, touch
it, you gotta touch it.
- [Erika] Oh, it's gushy.
- [Siobhan] Oh, it's jelly.
- [Rashawn] We are pushing his head-
(group audibly in awe of this brain)
- This bear truly, roaring in pain,
like, you can see, now
that you're inside it,
you have a target, like,
you just see a glowing field
of blue in front of you,
and you know you just need to
push through a little farther
to reach whatever's on the other side.
- I go, Thorn!
- Are you yelling inside the eye?
- [Rashawn] Yeah.
- God, that's so upsetting.
- I immediately- My wife.
(group laughs)
- [Izzy] My wife's in an eyeball.
- My wife's in an eyeball.
- [Aabria] Amazing.
- Okay.
- None of that really gets through.
You just, it's like yelling into Jell-O,
and you just hear a muffled sound.
- Okay.
- But I think she sounds more excited.
- If one more thing came off this bear,
I would flip out, I would be like,
this is all the things that
the bear should be able to do.
- Now, there's something in
the way this bear has staggered
and scrambled and has
taken an aggressive amount
of damage that calls all of the chipmunks
that are riding inside it into action.
(chipmunk squeaks)
I need everyone inside
the bear, excepting Viola,
to make an insight check for me.
- [Brennan] Ooh baby.
- [Siobhan] 13.
- [Izzy] No.
- Five.
- Six.
- 24.
- Holy sh*t. (laughs)
What'd you get, six?
- Six.
- Sweet, it makes sense
that children wouldn't
necessarily understand,
like, what is happening here,
but I think even though
you are head into the,
like, left ventricle of this bear,
you peek out and see a
sense of, like, frantic-ness
in all of these little
guys that would suggest
that they are worried
that if the bear dies,
only bad things will come to them.
Like, they are now going to move
to stop you all from k*lling the bear.
- I think this was what I was most hoping,
like, I was worried that standing next
to my kids was a losing battle
'cause I'm just one stoat
and I can't bat away every chipmunk,
but going and attacking the bear
and having them all swarm me
and leave my kids alone was, I think,
the best way this could turn out.
Cool, great, bring it on.
- [Aabria] All right, you get swarmed by-
- And all the backs are turned to you,
so that y'all can just.
- Yep.
- Yeah.
- Okay, does an 18 hit?
- [Brennan] 18 exactly hits.
- And then a 14 misses.
So the first one's gonna reach out,
and with its claws just sort of, like,
reaches and grabs onto you,
doing six points of damage.
reaches and grabs onto you,
doing six points of damage.
- Okay.
- And then for its second attack,
you didn't get to see it before
'cause you jumped in a little late,
but it opens its mouth a little too wide,
and you see a set of, it's not a tongue,
it's not a worm, it's something between,
this proboscis, like, lunges out for you.
- Proboscis.
- [Brennan] Jesus.
- All right, give me an
athletics or acrobatics check.
You have to beat a 19.
- Oh.
- You got it, sis.
- You can do it.
- Okay.
So a six damage, number one,
right?
- Yeah.
- So let's go ahead, first things first,
come down on those hit points.
I have to make a
concentration check for bless.
That's not great.
(dice rattling)
11, I make it.
- Perfect.
- And then we're gonna do
the athletics or acrobatics?
- Yeah, which one do you want to do?
- We'll do acrobatics, dex
is higher than strength.
(dice rattling)
10 plus four is 14.
- 14 is a little under, so
you're gonna take another
three points of piercing damage.
- Okay.
- As this thing lets its
proboscis out of its mouth,
and it grabs onto you and reaches,
this is psychotic,
(laughs) reaches into you,
and you feel it, like,
pressing into weak points
in and around your ear, by your nose,
as this thing grapples
you by the inside of you.
- Gotcha.
- [Aabria] And you are held.
- Copy that.
- Second guy fully missed their attacks,
but seems to be chittering
excitedly now that you are held.
- Make the concentration
on the second attack.
- Perfect.
All right, next up, Thorn.
(Jasper sighs)
- Okay, what would be the shortest route
for Thorn to get, basically
Thorn's going full,
like, predator mode.
I want to go for the base of
the neck of this creature.
- So you're gonna stay
on the outside, also?
- [Jasper] Well, whether it's
going inside one of the holes
and, like, up this way,
or, like, jumping up over
the top, I don't mind.
- Are you trying to attack it
from the inside of it
or the outside of it?
- Well, I guess it'd probably be better
to attack it from the inside of it.
Yeah, I'll maybe come
in through this hole.
Do I have enough movement
to get to, like, here?
- [Aabria] How much movement do you have?
- I have 30, so-
- [Aabria] So we're gonna come in,
and you'll land about
here, so, to get to here?
- [Jasper] Yeah, yeah.
- [Aabria] I think you just make it.
I have a little, have my little guy.
- [Jasper] If not, I have a thing.
(slow music)
- [Aabria] Yeah, you just make it.
- [Jasper] Just make it?
Okay, beautiful.
- Yeah.
- I'm gonna cast Zephyr Strike on
myself as a bonus action. (gasps)
- There's your little guy.
- Hi, buddy.
- [Brennan] Let's go.
(group chattering)
- [Aabria] Everyone meet Thorn Vale.
- You're all so cute.
- And he's got a little
lightning bolt on his chest, ah!
Okay, heck yeah.
- [Erika] You're all so cute.
- So I come in, is this a
lung here, collapsed lung?
- [Aabria] That is a collapsed lung, baby.
- [Jasper] I'm gonna boot
up this collapsed lung.
- [Aabria] Perfect.
- [Jasper] Right up here into,
right at the base of the neck.
- [Aabria] Amazing.
- [Jasper] Here, yeah, why not?
Let's go ahead-
- You cast magic?
- Yeah, so I'm gonna cast
Zephyr Strike on myself,
so I think these, like, thorns, like,
start kind of growing almost down my arms,
and I'm going to, I get to add
an extra D8 to this attack.
- [Aabria] Beautiful.
- Because of that, oh, and
I give myself advantage
on this attack because of Zephyr Strike.
(dice rattling)
That is a 15 plus five?
- Absolutely hits.
- I'm marking this as my Favored Foe.
- [Aabria] Yeah, okay.
- And then I'm also gonna
use Dreadful Strikes,
and then I get an extra D8 and a D10.
- [Izzy] Yeah.
- [Aabria] Let's go.
- That's my man.
(Aabria chuckles)
- Okay, and there's a lot of ones, okay.
Well, that's a 10, though.
- That's a 10.
- Okay, and 12, 16 plus three,
19.
- [Aabria] 19.
- Points of damage.
(Brennan cheers)
- Amazing.
- [Jasper] Can I see any of this blue?
Like, am I seeing this, or no?
- You're like, give me a medicine-
(Jasper laughs)
- [Jasper] Yikes.
- To try to, you know, get the cut right
so you can get an eye line.
- Okay, medicine, that is 17.
- Yeah, I think the way you sort of hack
into this, like, vertebrae,
once you sort of break
through the bony, spiny-ness of it all,
you see what is essentially
like a trickling little stream
you see what is essentially
like a trickling little stream
of cerebral spinal fluid coming through it
that glows faintly
blue, and at its source,
you see this massive blue
field, pool, something.
- Heck, yeah, okay.
- The bear, as a reaction,
is going to roar.
(muffled bear roar)
Everyone inside the bear,
I need you to make a DC
17 wisdom saving throw.
- Oof.
- Oh, boy
- Bless, Bless.
(magical whoosh)
(dice rattling)
- Yes, hell, yeah, okay,
dice are finally, 22 for me.
- Just let me know if you didn't make it.
- I didn't.
- I did not.
- Didn't.
- [Aabria] Okay.
- I did not.
- 12, no.
- 12, did anyone miss it by five or more?
Keep your hand up.
- [Izzy] Yeah.
- [Aabria] Ooh.
- Was it 17?
- [Aabria] Yeah, you're right there.
Okay, all of you are going to take-
- I have such good wisdom.
- Oh, no, (laughs) did you use Bless
on that?
- I used everything.
I rolled a two.
- Oh, no.
Okay, all of you are
gonna take five points
of thunder damage.
- [Siobhan] Great.
- Anyone that missed it by five or more,
so this excepts you.
Everyone else is now deafened
until the start of their next turn.
(players groaning)
As its entire chest cavity fills
with a roar
(bear roars)
that causes you to throw
your hands over your ears,
and all you can hear is your
own heartbeat in your ears.
- Because of Zephyr Strike,
whenever I make an attack
against a creature,
I get an extra 30 feet of movement,
so boom, let's go further in.
- All right.
- Reaction, Rebuke the
Violent against the bear.
- Amazing.
- [Jasper] Hey, there we go.
- Let's go.
- Just sitting here, deafened and grabbed
by parasitic worms, and I
just go, "Knock it off!"
(group laughs)
Wisdom save, wisdom save.
- [Aabria] Okay, wisdom save.
- DC is pretty low.
- Does an 11 make it?
- 11 exactly makes it, but
it's still half damage.
- [Aabria] Okay, go ahead
and roll that sweet, sweet-
- Or it's the damage, it's half
of the damage it just
did with that attack.
- Okay, then yeah, it's
gonna take a little more,
and you actually,
everyone feels this thing
shift as it staggers.
It is looking very rough.
- We get half of our damage, or-
- No, the bear just took a bunch of damage
as Tula yelled, "Knock it off."
- [Jasper] Knock it off. (laughs)
- Knock it off.
- [Aabria] To a bear?
Just not happy about dying.
- This is my magic, okay?
- I can't hear anything-
- Which is very like, sleepover energy,
everyone, just go to bed.
- But I feel like Mom is mad.
- Go to bed.
- Knock that off!
- Everyone, go to bed.
- [Aabria] Go to bed.
- Right now?
- Everyone, go to bed.
- It's 6:30.
- Go ahead, you have 30
more feet of movement.
This is absolutely difficult terrain
since you're moving through a body.
- That, of course, yeah.
- So I'm going to move
you 15 more feet forward,
and you are just sort of lost to vision.
I'm gonna have you hold onto your mini
until you, yeah, get there.
- We're in a forest.
Does that mean that he doesn't
have difficult terrain?
- I feel like the bear's
spine is probably not count
as the forest-
- Well, you know-
(group discussing and rule-lawyer-ing)
- I respect the effort.
I'm gonna give you inspiration
for making the wildest ask
that made me go, "I mean."
(Inspirational music) - Are you
fighting for something to be terrain
that probably shouldn't be?
Call Iyengar Mulligan.
- We've added a new partner,
it's all I'm saying.
- Thompson's been partner
track for a long time.
We're really excited. (laughs)
- It's really nice,
she's a diversity hire,
but we like it.
- Yeah, yeah, I am.
(group laughs)
The only non DM that they've hired.
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] Again, a diversity hire.
(group laughs)
- Me and a dog for some reason.
- On a bench.
- There's a dog there.
- All right, we're gonna scramble up
and attack way more of you now.
- [Brennan] Attack me, not my kids, you-
- [Aabria] Yeah, I hear you,
but you're pretty well grappled.
- [Siobhan] And I am prone.
- And this one, you're gonna see,
takes a big leap up, and it's
starting to move up the spine
and sees Thorn disappear-
- It's spider-walking up the spine?
- [Aabria] It is up here now.
- [Rashawn] That is crazy-
- [Siobhan] Nasty.
- [Aabria] And it's making its way to you.
All right.
- Absolutely nasty.
- We're gonna get an attack
with advantage against Jaysohn,
a natural one, thank God.
Does a 12 hit?
- No.
- Oh, it, (laughs) you know what?
There's no reason that
shouldn't have worked,
so I'm just gonna say, this
little chipmunk rocks up to you,
slips on a puddle of blood
that also kind of got you,
and lands a*s over
teakettle right next to you.
- See, it's slippery.
She can't hear anything that I'm saying.
(group laughs)
- He kind of gestures over to
his friends, like, (chirps)
(group laughs)
fully having missed, and
another one's gonna go-
- I feel like we could just have a chat
with this chipmunks and be like,
"Yo, guys, why are we doing this?"
- Lila, does a 14 hit you?
- Exactly.
- Meets it, beats it. And
you see this thing claws you
for two points of piercing damage,
and it's going to attempt,
just as the rest of them,
I need you to make an athletics
or acrobatics check as it attempts
to grapple you with its mouth proboscis.
You've gotta beat a 14.
(dice rattling)
- And I absolutely do with a 22.
- Amazing, what does it look like as you-
(dark music)
- I grab this thing.
- [Aabria] You want to grab it?
- Yeah.
- I'll let you grab it and
you can do some damage,
but it will keep you in melee with it
and you might take a little damage back.
- (whisper) Do it.
- [Aabria] But now you have it (Jasper and
Siobhan whispering 'Do it' over and over)
- Okay, I'll do it.
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] Okay.
- Something is telling me to-
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] Something.
- [Jasper] Something.
- All right, you roll
a D8, I'll roll a D4.
- [Izzy] Okay.
- [Aabria] All right,
you take three points
of piercing damage.
- Seven.
- Yes.
- Nice.
- [Siobhan] Plus.
- So you actually see that this thing is,
like, looking for purchase on you
and doesn't really have that, like,
weak point 'cause you've
got it in your hands,
and you see that, like, one of the bits
of this, like, ribbon-like
tongue is trying to,
like, burrow into the side of your paw.
So it's only three points of damage,
but you have a better understanding-
(dark music stops)
- Oh, I snapped my eraser in half.
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] Hey, good,
you know what, honestly-
- Welcome to my world,
you know what I mean?
- Okay, but they can, like,
kind of understand us, right?
- Give me an insight check.
- Ooh.
Come on.
- Can it be investigation?
- [Aabria] Sure.
- c*ck.
(dice rattling)
Help me, help me, God.
- I'm sure it'll be fine. (laughs)
- Okay, okay.
- No, that's, no.
- That's, that's-
- It's mostly on the 20.
(group laughs)
- [Jasper] c*ck,
that's definitely c*ck.
- Aabria.
- [Aabria] Yeah?
- That is a natural 20.
- If you let me give you
three more points of damage,
I'll let you use a c*ck die as a 20.
- (indignantly) I have never.
- Done.
- [Aabria] Done?
- Done, done.
- Everything's for sale at this table.
- Look, I'm enjoying my time here.
Okay, with a natural 20 on investigation,
what are you trying to
understand in this moment?
- If I can, like, talk
some sense into this girl.
(group laughs)
- So the one in front of you,
you understand that, like,
it's getting in sort of
broad stokes what's going on,
though the language barrier is there.
The analogy sort of above
game would be, like,
trying to, like, chasten a dog
where you're like, "I know
this dog doesn't understand,
like, don't poop in
this specific instance,
but it understands, like,
you've done something
wrong in this moment."
So you're sort of seeing it, like,
the difference in
intellect between the two.
So this thing is pretty smart.
It's smart enough to
have, with its friends,
moved into a bear, figured out
how to keep it alive enough
that they are now moving
through the woods safely
in a den of their own making,
but not quite smart enough to, like,
achieve language and, like,
the level of civilization
or society that you had within the Warren.
- Uh-huh, so I can't tell
it to, like, save my mom?
(Aabria laughs)
- That would also be convincing it
against its better judgment,
but I'll give you a different question.
Like, yeah, you cannot
communicate with this thing
to tell it to go do something else.
And we are back up to the top again.
Jaysohn, you are up.
- Okay, I am gonna use half my movement
to stand up from prone.
- [Aabria] Done.
- And then I'm gonna punch the one
that
is already,
wait, no, I'll punch whichever one
who's little f*cking
weird proboscis is going
into my sister.
- I want to use it (silent) later.
- You can't talk to me,
we're deaf right now.
- [Rashawn] Oh, yeah.
- (silent) Well, I still want to use it.
- (silent) What? No.
- [Jasper] Oh, yeah.
- That's my sister.
- I will say, you can punch that one,
but the one right next to you is prone,
and you would have advantage
on the attacks-
- [Siobhan] Oh, then I'll do that.
Great, oh, great.
- [Aabria] To to the one that slipped
in the same little-
- [Siobhan] Yes.
- [Aabria] Yuck puddle as you.
- That's a 14.
- [Aabria] 14 hits.
- Okay, great, and then it's
Primal Savagery plus modifier?
- Yep.
- Wild.
(dice rolling)
That's 11 damage, how's it looking?
- Bloodied, about half dead.
- Well, I'm not gonna
use a ki point on it.
I'll just do a regular bonus attack.
- [Aabria] Cool.
- Extra attack on it, and that's a crit.
- Oh.
- Oh!
- [Aabria] Yeah.
- [Brennan] There it is, there it is.
- [Siobhan] So I didn't mean to.
- Let's go. (chittering)
- So that is nine, 10, 11,
16, 16 damage.
- Here's what I want.
Siobhan, please explain to
me how Jaysohn stands up
and obliterates the
chipmunk in front of him.
- I stand up and then, like,
jump fully on its back,
all four claws into its
belly, and I bite its neck.
- Ooh.
- [Aabria] Ugh.
- [Aabria] Give me-
- Like a stoat.
- Yeah, give me an intimidation check.
- Like a stoat.
- Like a stoat.
(dice rattling)
- That's a 13.
- [Izzy] With Bless?
- The best possible time to crit
in the wrong-
- [Siobhan] There?
- No, wrong way, natural-
- Oh.
- [Jasper] Oh!
- The one that's currently in
a sort of grapple situation
with you maintains itself, but this one,
truly upset about the
brutal act of violence
that reduced a brother into a hashtag.
(group laughs)
- You put him on a T-shirt.
- So these guys can't
talk, but they can tweet,
is what I'm supposed to understand.
(group laughs)
- You've been on Twitter,
that makes perfect sense.
(group chattering)
- Hashtag past tense.
- This is the representation of Twitter.
This is what Twitter is.
(group laughs)
- A blood-soaked chipmunk is Twitter now.
- [Brennan] Yeah.
- [Aabria] So that's gonna give both you
and your sister attacks of opportunity
as this thing leaves your threatened area.
- Oh, great, I'll attack
him as a reaction.
Sure, why not?
I don't have anything else
to do as a reaction.
- You also can.
- Absolutely, I will do it.
- That's an 18.
- [Aabria] Hits.
- Let me ask you a question right now.
- Hold on, let's get this damage first
'cause this is gonna take a second.
13 points of damage?
- Yeah, I'm strong.
- [Jasper] Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, you're also, like, a child.
- Yeah, I'm a strong child.
You ever try and wrestle
an eight-year-old,
Aabria, they're strong.
- [Rashawn] They are.
- Yeah, it's because they
have no moral compunction.
- [Siobhan] Exactly.
- Yeah.
It's the idea of, like,
I don't have a sense of,
like, how much I should do-
- Yeah, I have no sense of,
I am trying to hurt this chipmunk.
- And you absolutely do.
This thing, like, staggers
and is crawling back (laughs)
towards its liver, half
dead from a monster,
truly just a monster in here with it.
So you got tongue in one hand.
Simon's leaving your threatened range,
so you're kind of just swiping
out as it's running away.
This is just like a cheap shot
as it moves away from you.
- Oh, okay.
Okay, okay, I'm gonna continue holding on
to mine, and then sneak attack that one.
- Yeah.
- [Izzy] The other one
threatening my brother.
- Are you throwing a thorn,
or are you-
- How close are we, can I just-
- Melee, that's why this is happening.
Like, this thing was right next to you
and is running away from you.
- I'll Primal Savagery it.
- Perfect, go ahead and
make an attack roll.
- Okay.
(dice rattling)
16.
- [Aabria] Hits.
- Cool.
- Primal Savagery is a D10
plus your sneak attack.
(Izzy sings)
(dice rattling)
- Why are you worried
about them, they're fine.
- They're honestly nightmares.
- They are honestly so fine.
- [Izzy] 11.
- I don't know
that we're all the same level.
(group laughs)
- And we shouldn't be.
- I could show you their character sheets
if you want, Brennan, I mean.
- I need you to explain
to me how you tag team,
like, you see your
brother get in a big hit,
and you swipe out with one last hit.
Explain how you k*ll
Simon, my little chipmunk.
- I think it sort of, like,
perfectly shows, like,
the dichotomy of our
personalities of siblings because-
- A metaphor.
- Because Jaysohn, like, does, like,
(imitates fighting noises)
does it, and then I'm, like, holding,
and I'm just, like, sort of look over
and just, like, claw its face off.
(group laughs at the brutality)
- [Aabria] All right, so
you're now holding a tongue
and a face.
(group cackles)
- And I look at mine and I go. (laughs)
(Brennan laughs heartily)
- Intimidation check, I'm
gonna give you advantage
because of your brother.
- Thank God.
- Truly we're the monsters in this forest.
- [Aabria] Yeah.
(Alvin and the Chipmunks impression)
♪ I still want a hula hoop ♪
- [Aabria] No.
(players laughing as impression continues)
- [Erika] ♪ We can hardly stand the wait ♪
- [Jasper] You pulled us into this space.
- I didn't mean, I just
needed a naming convention.
- (Dave impression) Alvin!
- Jaysohn!
- [Jasper] Jaysohn.
- 16.
- This one begins, like,
trying to pull back
from you so much that,
like, there are multiple,
it almost looks like vasculature,
like, this tongue is like bits of vein,
and it is tearing some of
the weaker vessels trying
to get out of your grip,
and it's doing, like,
damage to itself to try to get away
from the two of you,
a whole a*s nightmare.
- Can I let go of the
face and grab another one?
- No.
(Jasper cackles)
But I appreciate the effort.
Ava, you're up, Lila, you're on deck.
- I shout out,
All right, your kids
have their first blood,
drew their first blood, all
right, good job, everyone.
Candies for all.
I'm going to use a Rabbit
Hop then to jump 10 feet away
without provoking an opportunity attack.
- Okay, okay, how far away
can you get, like, here?
- Yeah, and then 30 feet
up here, up the spine.
- [Aabria] Yep.
- [Erika] All right.
- [Aabria] Where are you trying to get to?
Just let me know how far
you're trying to go.
- [Erika] Right here, right here.
- [Aabria] Yeah, you can get there,
that's no problem.
- [Erika] All right.
So I get there.
- This bear has scoliosis.
- This bear has seen some sh*t
and has done nothing mean to you yet.
- [Rashawn] I'm just saying-
- Justice for this g*dd*mn bear.
- So I take all of these
clumps of nerves here,
reach down in between the vertebrae,
and I take a clump of nerves and I yank,
and then the thoracic vertebrae
that should probably control
the lower half, is it the legs?
- Okay, you think you could
just control the bear now?
- I don't know, we'll see.
- Y'all are so g*dd*mn wild,
and I get why you're related.
It's so interesting, all right.
- Like, "Ooh, Mommy." (claps)
- Now, we're counting it down.
I will say maybe that's lumbar,
so go ahead and give me a
luck, just straight luck roll.
- All right.
(dramatic electronic music)
That's a one.
(group chattering)
- All right, sure, you
think you've got this.
(group laughs)
- All right, while I shout,
Hang on, kids, and I yank.
- [Aabria] Give me an attack roll.
- I guess I'll do, I will
use Primal Savagery for this.
- [Aabria] Sure.
- Or...
Or can I use my club?
- I mean, you're trying to
reach in and yank, it's not,
it's less of a scoop-
- I dig in and I dig in,
then I sort of yank up.
(rope whipping)
(Aabria laughs at the nerve of this play)
- [Rashawn] Whoa.
- I'm in hell, but I gotta allow
that you're gonna use a
raccoon p*nis bone to dig
into the spine of a bear-
- Yeah, we really brushed
over that.
- Yeah, yeah.
- [Siobhan] When that happened-
- We can talk about it, but let me just-
- I've been thinking
about it the whole time.
- Yeah, hey, under here, just explain,
like, there's gonna be
a lot of nature facts.
A baculum is a d*ck bone.
- Huh.
- Only some animals have them.
That's how you can tell the difference
between a fox skeleton and a dog skeleton,
'cause foxes have p*nis bones.
- Fox have a d*ck bone?
- [Siobhan] Yeah, dogs don't.
- (silently) Yeah.
- [Aabria] What was your?
- 11.
- Okay, with an 11, you
kind of get down in there.
You don't really get,
like, the yank you want,
but you do start destroying some of it.
Like, it's not the
precision effort you want.
- Okay, well, something's
gonna happen there,
if you're attacking the nerves,
like-
- [Aabria] Oh, for sure.
- Some sort of movement's gonna happen.
- [Izzy] You got the damage?
- What's the damage?
- [Erika] Oh, the damage is eight.
- Eight points of damage,
this bear is looking
extremely rough, and as you sever the,
like, nerves going to its back legs,
I need everyone to make
a strength saving throw.
You're gonna make yours with disadvantage
'cause you're not holding onto its spine.
You're sort of just ripping nerves up
in a moment as its entire, like, haunches
at the back slams down.
- I do have advantage
on strength checks right now.
So does it just even?
- [Aabria] Sure, so it's flat now.
- Nat one.
- I got a 24.
- 12, but I'm restrained.
- [Aabria] Perfect.
- Nine.
- [Aabria] (whisper) Nine?
- [Jasper] 13.
- But I'm in the brain.
- 13.
- 16.
- All right, so it's sort
of just Lila at this point.
I think because you're
not gripping anything
for stability, you're just
holding a tongue and a face.
(Erika laughs wheezily)
- Yes.
- [Izzy] We fall together.
- [Aabria] We fall together.
(Rashawn faintly speaking)
I'm gonna send you, one, two, three.
Can we performance check?
I just want you to roll
something different
to hold onto this tongue
as you literally go sailing in the air.
- No.
- [Aabria] All right.
Let's see.
- No, I don't hold on.
- It's okay, go ahead
and roll a D6 for me.
- [Siobhan] Oh, boy.
- [Aabria] Oh. (laughs)
- Four.
- You deal four more points of damage
as you take half of its tongue with you.
(group groans in disgust)
And you're gonna take 12
points of bludgeoning damage
as you, like, hit-
- [Izzy] I'm gonna take 12 points
of bludgeoning damage?
- Yeah, you just flew
across the body.
- On a liver.
(group snickers)
- Yeah, a cirrhosis liver,
the bear has a problem,
so it's actually quite hard.
- Ooh, a hard liver.
(group groans)
You've gotta go to the-
(group 'hm'-ing in agreement)
- That's why they had to add
moss, to get it soft again.
- So in the medical profession,
you have what we call hard liver.
- Hard liver, it's terrible,
you don't like to see that.
- We should just marinate it overnight,
you know, let it get good,
like a yogurt based marinade or something.
(Siobhan laughs)
- But you take this thing's proboscis
off the table, it's just
taken too much damage.
- [Siobhan] Well, that's good.
- Are you done?
- [Izzy] I'm happy.
- Uh-huh, yes, and I can't
help but think to myself
that this would actually
make a nice burrow
if we got all of those
chipmunks out, you know?
This is kind of how, the way that-
- Mama!
- My grandmother, yes?
- We're all deaf, but no.
(group chattering)
- Grandma, can I stay in the left kidney?
Can that be my bedroom?
- Well.
I suppose you'll have to
ask your mother.
- Wild.
Nope, Lila, you're up, do.
- Well, my spine is broken.
(group laughs)
- There's plenty to go
around, you can get more.
Store bought's fine.
- I make my spine at home.
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] It's like bone broth.
- For my husband, I make my spine at home.
(group laughs)
- [Izzy] Can I make it to where my mom is?
- How much movement do you have?
- [Izzy] 30.
- And then you have that bonus action
Rabbit Hop, too.
- [Izzy] I could Rabbit Hop.
- Do you bonus action Rabbit Hop to do it?
You also have bonus action dash.
So you can get there,
you're just gonna have
to burn your bonus action to do it.
- Yeah, sure, I'll bonus.
- [Aabria] Sweet, then you
can get right up behind it.
- [Izzy] And can I sneak attack this one
that's burrowing into my mother?
- You absolutely can.
- [Siobhan] Yay!
- Then can I grab
onto its proboscis?
- We'll see, we'll see.
- Stop putting your hands
on the proboscis, kids.
(Aabria laughs)
- Natural 20.
(group cheers)
- Brrah!
- Amazing.
- [Jasper] That was a sound effect, just-
- With my dying breath, I'm
going to save my brother-
- Your dying breath?
- I have six hit points.
- Oh, don't be so dramatic.
(group chattering)
- Why didn't you say anything?
(Rashawn hyperventilating)
I'm in the brain, (laughs) I can't.
- [Brennan] I'm in the brain,
I can't hear what's happening.
I'm in the brain.
(group laughs)
We're all over this f*cking bear.
- I know, (laughs) it's just,
(whisper) I'm gonna bite the brain.
- [Siobhan] They're looking at me.
- Where are you guys,
yeah, I'm in the brain.
- Just drop a pin.
- [Izzy] Yeah, wait, are you using-
- Share your location with me, I don't-
- I'm in the medulla oblongata.
(group laughs)
- So I get to do four D6 and two D8?
- Wait, are you using Primal Savagery?
- [Izzy] Yeah.
- That's a D10.
- Two D10?
- [Aabria] Yes, oh, no, this is so sad.
I was gonna absolutely wipe
the floor with your mom, sh*t.
- You were gonna wipe
the floor with my mom?
- Yeah, but now you're gonna
k*ll it, unless you roll-
- [Izzy] Oh, you were
gonna wipe up the floor
with my mom.
- I was going to,
and then you crit on my guy.
(dice rattling)
- How much is this?
This is, like, four D6
plus two D10 or something?
- Yeah.
- [Izzy] Okay.
- [Aabria] Plus modifier.
- One, one.
- [Aabria] Okay.
- Three, five, five, six, six.
- Oh, you just said numbers.
- [Rashawn] 16.
- Well, someone needs to add that for me.
- [Rashawn] Sixteen plus-
One, one, three.
- [Brennan] Five.
- Five, five, six, six.
- [Rashawn] 21.
- 27, plus your modifier?
- [Erika] Plus five.
- Plus five.
- [Brennan] 32.
(Erika squeals)
(Jasper blows air out forcefully)
- Absolutely obliterated, you can take,
you can take the proboscis
when you're done.
This thing had 30 hit points.
- Wow.
- Just tell me what you do.
- I'm gonna grab as many of the tongues
and just yank them all out.
(viscera splashing)
- Yeah, you reach out with your claws.
You reach and, like, grab
it by the back of its skull,
paralyzing it, and then reach
around with your other hand
and grab that disgusting
tongue and rip down, now-
and grab that disgusting
tongue and rip down, now-
- Hurt Mommy?
- You roll the damage,
roll three D6 for me.
- On my mom?
(dramatic music)
- Just roll three D6.
- It's okay, it's okay.
- It's okay.
- [Rashawn] It's okay.
- [Aabria] Yeah.
You're good, she's fine.
- She's the dungeon master, sweetie.
You have to roll three D6.
(group laughs)
- Are you my mom or my
husband in this moment?
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] Why not both?
- Nine.
- Nine, so you're gonna
take nine points of damage
as, like, that tongue sort of, like,
rips out of the various holes.
It was going to do way more damage
if it had gotten to its turn,
so unless you were gonna sit there
and surgically, like, remove-
- Thank you for saying that.
- [Aabria] Yeah, you're great.
- Okay.
- She shakes it off.
Is there anything else you
want to do, you little heathen?
Delightful.
- [Izzy] There's another
chipmunk there, right?
- Yeah, do you have another attack?
- No.
(group laughs)
- I mean, that'll g*dd*mn do.
- [Jasper] Yep.
- Amazing.
- As you rip the tongue
out and it comes out of me
and this chipmunk is immediately dead,
I'm just gonna look at you and go-
- I still have the face.
- [Aabria] Of course you do.
- I have a group of tongues and the face.
- I look at that and I think,
unfortunately, I think to be realistic,
I'm not in the head space
where I can have a sweet moment right now.
- [Aabria] Sure.
- But I think hauntingly
I go, I look at you
and say the same thing I
said to your brother earlier,
I've only ever seen one stoat do that.
- What?
- I just, run, run, fight, fight, run.
- What's the Blue?
(Brennan stammers)
- It's, I'm gonna tell you about the Blue.
Thank you, sweetie.
I'm gonna tell you about the Blue
when we're not in the bear.
- You know, just 'cause it's really funny,
can you roll an intimidation check for me?
It's like-
- Against whom?
The other hurt 'munk?
- [Aabria] Your mom.
Yeah, it'll be against both.
- My mommy?
- Yeah, I think you're
terrifying right now
in, like, a fun way.
- [Izzy] Bad, bad.
- I mean, the chipmunk rolled a two.
- A nat one, oh.
(group laughs)
She thinks I'm adorable.
(group laughs)
- Just a little blood-soaked guy.
- I look at you and go,
My little sweetie.
(group laughs)
Hug my daughter.
- I think there's something
really sweet about,
like, the camera angle on this
that, like, just zoomed in on you,
is fully a horror show,
and then it just backs up,
that you're, like, you're a child
and you've just done a good
job, and it's not as scary,
but you are become death-
- And I'm holding a face
and a bunch of tongues, yeah.
- A little bit, yeah.
- The Brad Pitt "Seven" meme,
"What's in the Blue, what's"-
- [Jasper] What's in the Blue?
- [Aabria] All right.
- Jaysohn, look.
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] Tula, you are
up, Viola, you're on deck.
- [Rashawn] Okay.
- Okay.
Is there still, there's
still a chipmunk up
in the mix with us, right?
- [Siobhan] Yeah.
- There's a chipmunk up in the mix.
Give me a perception check.
(dice rattling)
- Perception is going to be 12.
- The chipmunk is up in the mix
and still there and
moving and looks incensed,
truly furious, like,
frothing at the mouth.
But you are standing on a heart
that has slowed down to the point
where, like, you look
down and you're like,
still technically beating.
This thing is on its last legs,
so what do you want to do?
- Let me ask you, dungeon master.
- Me!
- If this thing seems on death's door,
and, like, the smartest
thing for me to do is
just keep chewing through this heart,
that's what I'm gonna do.
I am out of smites, I've
used up all my juice, right?
There's one thing that I could do
that would be very weird,
but if I feel like I can't-
- Well, you gotta do it.
- If I feel like I can't
get it done in one bite,
I think I need to throw the Hail Mary
'cause of me and my daughter
are both very injured.
So there's a weirder thing I think
I would try to do in this moment
if I feel like I can't
get it done in one hit.
- Okay, sh**t, 'cause I
want to see the cool thing.
The honest answer is, if
you focus on this thing
and land the hit, it's done.
- Okay.
But I also know my sister
and Thorn are out there,
so I think what I might,
this is a weird one.
I'm just gonna throw
it at you, just 'cause
I want you as a fellow
person who loves the rules
of the game to know.
- Yeah.
- I can spend five points of Lay on Hands
to cure a disease,
and I'm standing on
the heart of this bear.
- Oh, sh*t.
- I don't know what that would do,
but there's part of me
that knows I can do this.
I know I can heal my kids
when they're sick, right?
And I'm standing on this bear,
and looking at these chipmunks
and seeing the whole last round of combat,
I think I look and go,
"This animal's not dead,
and it hasn't done
anything other than roar,
likely in pain," and there's
some amount of empathy
that goes out to it.
Empathy here might be k*lling it, right?
I'm going to, I think, release five points
of Lay on Hands into the
heart to cure a disease,
just to see what that would do.
- Cool.
- Cool.
- Give me just a charisma
check, your spell casting.
(dice rattling)
- That's a four.
- Okay, in this moment,
you know how to end the threat.
This thing is on death's door,
but there's a lot of
things happening right now.
The death of the bear seems
like the worst possible outcome
for these chipmunks, but
it's not going to k*ll them.
But you do, as you're sort
of putting all of this together,
realize that the disease afflicting
this bear is this parasite infection.
(slow orchestral music)
You don't think, with a four,
that curing this bear will spare its life,
but you do think it
might knock out the rest
of those parasites.
- Okay, the bear's beyond saving.
I know I rolled very badly,
but just based on your narration there,
it's like the disease is
the thing keeping it alive,
kind of thing, okay.
- Yeah.
- In that case, I will go for it.
I will knock out, I will put
five points into the bear
and try to knock out
the parasites, if I can.
- Okay.
Lila, you've wanted to know for so long
what the Blue is, this thing
that you've heard about,
spoken in terms too nebulous
for a mind as sharp as yours.
spoken in terms too nebulous
for a mind as sharp as yours.
Jaysohn, in that same
way, you see your mom sort
of changing from a k*ll stroke
to something different,
something cleverer,
and you see her hands go entirely to blue
as she puts them deep into
the tissue of this heart
and releases something
that causes a surge of blue
to move all the way through,
a pulse through this entire body.
What are you looking for
or at in this moment,
where you are suddenly, like,
point blank looking at the interaction
of blue in the world
coming from your mother,
the person you trust
most out of all things?
Like, where is your priority?
Are you trying to
understand the magic of it?
Are you trying to understand your mother?
Are you trying to understand the bear?
Are you trying to understand,
like, these chipmunks, this parasite?
What do you care about as, like,
this big tremendous thing goes off?
Where are your eyes?
- My mom.
- Give me, then, an investigation check.
(slow suspenseful music)
- 15.
- What you see, as she
releases this energy
into the heart, is her eyes go blue,
and then sort of her arms are covering it,
but you see, as though it was, like,
a light under a blanket or behind,
like, under a lampshade, a flash
of blue where her heart is.
And the pallor that it casts
internally to her feels wrong,
And the pallor that it casts
internally to her feels wrong,
fundamentally wrong for the first time.
The thing she's doing isn't wrong,
but there is something wrong
with the magic as it moves through her.
Jaysohn, what do you care about?
- I mean, I'm pretty hungry.
- [Erika] Ooh, (laughs) what?
- [Jasper] Yum.
- After all this, you want to eat?
- [Aabria] So distracted?
- Work.
- I don't know, Jaysohn's not smart.
Lila is the smart one.
- So what's Jaysohn looking at?
Are you trying to, like, get a little,
get a little bite?
- I'm just thinking about
having a little bite.
Maybe one of these chipmunks,
we've k*lled a lot of chipmunks.
I'm pretty hungry, I'm just
a little hungry. (laughs)
I'm just a little hungry guy.
I'm growing.
- Give me a wisdom
saving throw.
(dice rattling)
- I crit.
(group laughs)
- Aren't you good at wisdom?
- [Izzy] What was that?
- I crit and I got a crit, a nat 20.
- Oh, a natural 20, oh, okay.
I thought it was the wrong kind-
- [Brennan] So it's for a 25, you'd, yeah-
- I believed, (laughs) I believed you.
- Come on, nephew.
- You have this, like, insane, like,
just intrusive thought,
and then it gets chased
with the thing that you've seen and know,
and you, not in that impulsive way of,
like, I don't really care.
It feels like a phenomenally
good idea to take a bite.
Do you do so?
- Yeah, I'm hungry.
I'm hungry, I take a bite.
(group chattering)
- As your mouth, like,
sinks into this flesh,
like, the flesh goes blue in your hand
as your mom's magic
pulses through everything,
and you feel a connection to the Blue,
even behind your eyes.
- Oh, my God.
- Guys, you should try
this, it's pretty good.
- [Izzy] Are you freaking magic-
- You're gonna level up.
- Oh.
(group exclaims)
- Chomp, chomp, chomp, chomp, chomp!
(group chattering)
- Ava, what do you care about
and what are you looking
at in this moment?
(slow electronic music)
- Did I just see that?
- This is all happening simultaneously.
This is the b*llet time of, like,
something big is happening
and what were you looking at?
It's like the vantage point, like,
what were you looking at when it happened?
- I look back
(group chattering)
at the family, and I try to remember
what it was like that day so long ago.
Do I know this?
- History or arcana with advantage.
(dice rattling)
- Both of them are zero.
(dice rattling)
(slow electronic music continues)
It's a 14, and I'm gonna
put it into history.
It's a 14, and I'm gonna
put it into history.
- You think back,
and the creatures that you saw,
they walked on two legs.
You've seen a bear walk on two legs before
when it's kind of reaching up a tree.
This is different.
You were covered with something
that you've never seen since then,
but the smell of it,
that plastic-y wrongness,
but that ozone of whatever the people
in your Warren call Blue,
though you think that's a bit
of a coddling name for
it, it's everywhere.
This isn't what you experienced
in that moment, but this is a part
of whatever's happening to your home,
to your family, it's all connected,
and you feel now closer than ever
to what you experienced on that day.
(slow orchestral music)
You pumped five points curing the disease
in this bear, and every other chipmunk
(faint heartbeat)
immediately drops to the ground, dead.
This parasitic behavior,
they were keeping it alive.
Everything in this wood
knows how dangerous it is
to be here, and they
looked for different ways,
"How do I protect myself,
how do I protect what I care about?
Build nests, find something strong."
This is just sort of, animals,
(slow orchestral music continues)
(heartbeat continues)
and when you think
of what an animal is, you
feel just a little bit
of distance from that idea, not stoat,
but animals exploit one another.
That's how nature works, and
this is just a different,
more terrible kind of exploitation,
and you in this moment are able
to put an end to that cycle.
But in that same vein,
you feel the heart stop beating,
and all of you feel, as
this bear just slowly,
not in a tremendous flash of pain,
just lays down and is quiet and still.
And for Thorn and Viola,
you see that blue field
that you were working toward
flash blue and begin to dim.
What do you do?
(slow electronic music)
- I was gonna bite this brain.
(Aabria laughs)
- [Izzy] She was, she was.
- Go ahead.
- I was going to, like,
and almost in the same vein of my sister,
like, this is an organ that,
if I bite its brain stem,
this whole thing, it's like Jenga to me.
- You get there and you see,
you've seen so many brains,
you are all carnivores and predators,
and its sort of pulsing glow
begins to weaken and dim.
- Go, honey, take a bite.
- [Aabria] You're met on the
other side by your husband.
- [Jasper] Just through the brain, just?
- Meet me at the brain.
- [Jasper] Hello, sweetheart.
- Oh, God.
- It's the worst "Lady and the tr*mp"
I've ever seen. (slurps)
♪ This is the night ♪
- I was thinking about Steve and Miranda
on the Brooklyn Bridge.
- [Siobhan] Oh, yes, yes.
- I need both of you
to make, you're gonna make
a charisma saving throw,
and you're gonna make
a wisdom saving throw.
- [Jasper] Okay.
- I got a six.
- A six?
- [Rashawn] Yes.
- You bite in-
- You level down.
- And you're, (laughs)
you're a level one now.
- No.
- [Jasper] No.
(Aabria laughs)
- You bite in and the Blue, like,
rushes into you and through you,
and though you feel like
you've connected to something,
something that is overwhelming
but not unfamiliar,
you feel the world sort of swirl
and go to black around you
as you lose consciousness,
but you're okay-
- An 11?
- You watch your wife drop
and hold on just a little bit longer
as your bite into it seems
to send the other half
of that surging blue into you,
and you're able to see her
and see sort of your last thought being,
"She's not dead, but this was too much."
And in that way of surrender,
you also surrender to
it and fall unconscious.
- I just reach out for her.
- Oh, you just feel my hand go limp,
or my paw go limp in your hand, paw.
- You feel her glove.
(group laughs)
- The glow of the Blue fades away,
and everything is still and
silent inside this bear.
You're almost immediately,
(dark orchestral music)
you can kind of feel the way it settles,
that this would not be
a good permanent home.
It was only the fact of it, like,
staying alive that the
muscles stayed tight,
that nothing went slack,
that you're more in a,
like, deflated basketball now
than in, like, a little
house made of meat.
(dark orchestral music stops)
What, why, I used basketball.
That was the best word I could think of.
- Aabria, I'm just
reacting to the-
- [Aabria] Ball is life.
- Beautiful language, and it is upsetting.
- You're doing it beautifully disgusting.
- Thank you.
- [Rashawn] So well.
- [Jasper] Fantastic.
- What do you guys want to do?
- Well, I'm glad you all decided
to come after your old
grandmother finally.
- Just give a speech, interesting.
- Yes.
- Jaysohn looks better
than he's ever looked.
Two of them look like
they're on death's door,
and you are fully, like, there
is no sign of Thorn or Viola.
- Well.
- Oh, did any of us see which way,
I know, we, I don't
think, saw Viola going in,
but maybe we saw Thorn
going up this way-
- [Jasper] Might have seen me?
- I mean, you pulled me up after I,
like, fell, and then you
jumped after your mother,
so I was in the tree at some point.
- I all but let you go.
(group trying to hold in laughter)
- I don't think anyone has an
idea of where Viola is, but
you moved in pretty stealthily-
- [Jasper] I jumped in through this one
and then hopped up this way-
- Yeah, but, you know,
they were in the middle of a fight.
I'll let everyone that's still
up in this room make either,
like, perception,
history, or investigation
to have clocked and, like,
have situational awareness
of where everyone was during the fight.
- A 19, no, 18.
- [Aabria] All right, you see it.
- 11.
- [Aabria] You kind of missed it
'cause you were going
straight for the heart
and worried about your children.
- 22.
- [Aabria] Sweet, yes, you also are aware.
- Dirty 20.
- [Aabria] Oh, yes, all three.
Basically everyone-
- I know where everybody
is at all times, I have eyes-
- Sure, so, yeah,
you can give a speech.
- In the back of my head.
- You know, you saw him
run along the spine.
- So I'm like, yes,
all right, all right, all right.
Jaysohn, get that stuff out of your mouth.
Get that stuff out of
your mouth, it's no good.
- I think I'm just,
I think I'm just very still
and I'm scooping up Lila
and I'm just crying really hard.
I don't think I'm, like,
weeping or something,
I think I'm just crying really hard.
- Can I run over to them
and do that child-like pat on the back?
- Don't cry, don't, don't cry.
- [Siobhan] Are you okay, Mum?
- [Brennan] I think I'm patting the heart.
I'm just patting this bear's heart.
(slow piano music)
- Give me perception, medicine,
or insight, your call.
- I'll do insight.
(slow piano music continues)
It's a 16.
- As you pat this heart,
and sort of pour your sympathy
into the situation into it,
there's a little part
in the back of your mind
that understands that there's
just a little bit too much
in common right now.
- Sweet pea, don't cry.
You did what you had to do,
and you saved your family.
You did real good, now
stop, dry your tears,
and we gotta keep moving.
- And Lila got so many tongues.
- [Erika] Yes, Lila did
get so many tongues.
- You just got, like, it's like a bouquet.
- Yes, yes, you did very nice.
- [Aabria] Oh, my God. (laughs)
- I'm gonna turn and say,
"Jaysohn, could you help us find
Auntie Viola and Uncle Thorn?"
"Jaysohn, could you help us find
Auntie Viola and Uncle Thorn?"
- Yeah, I think Uncle Thorn went that way.
- Could you go find him?
- Go around the spinal, I do believe
he's under the spinal ganglia, and-
- Yeah, (laughs) I crawl through after-
- [Aabria] Yeah, you see,
just sort of in that, like,
end of that glow (laughs)-
- Beautiful, just two, like,
otters holding hands at sea,
but two stoats floating
in a brain. (laughs)
- Here's what we're gonna do.
Put a little, like,
thing right down there.
Otters, also mustelids.
- [Jasper] Hey, there you go.
- There you go, there you go.
- [Aabria] Part of the family.
And you see your aunt
and uncle holding hands
across a big, old brain.
- I think they might be dead.
- No, no, I don't believe
that they're dead.
Oh, they don't look great.
- [Aabria] Wild.
- I'm just, as I come out there, I'm like,
Hey, Thorn?
- [Siobhan] Mom?
- Yes, Jaysohn?
- [Erika] Thorn?
- Can you do that blue hand thing?
- I'll be right there.
And I'm gonna look at Lila and say,
You did amazing, sweetie,
you saved my life.
- You've been the Blue this whole time
and you didn't tell me?
- Sweetie, you remember the bedtime story.
We're all the Blue, the
Blue's in all of us.
It has been the whole time.
I'll tell you all about it,
let's get out of this bear.
- Viola, wake up.
- I'm gonna take your
paw and I'm gonna go up
to the brain-
- The one with the face in it
or the one-
- [Rashawn] Mama?
- With the tongues in it?
- Oh, yeah, she is holding
onto a lot of body parts.
So which one you grabbing?
- Sweetie, we're not
gonna need any of those.
(group laughs)
- I want to keep it.
- Keep your, can you just pick
your one favorite and keep that?
(group laughs)
Pick your one favorite organ and keep that
'cause we don't have space for them all.
- Hey, hey, Lila, your mom's really cool,
but I think you get to keep what you want.
- Who's talking to me?
(group laughs)
- It's just a little voice inside
your heart, like, your mom's
giving a lot of orders.
- This is my new favorite NPC,
is the devil inside my child's head.
- You know, have you ever met a child?
The person that tells the
child to do crazy sh*t.
- My imaginary friend.
- Children have no
moral compunction.
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] Yeah.
- [Brennan] Are we gonna-
- Are you the Blue?
- Hi, it's me, Bluey.
(group laughs)
(group sings the "Bluey" theme song)
- Mum!
- [Aabria] Yeah. (laughs)
- Well, Blue, do I pick
the face or the tongue?
(group laughs)
- You should be able
to keep both, honestly.
- I agree,
but my mom told me-
- [Aabria] Let your mom know
that you're, you saved your-
- So I'll keep the face.
- [Aabria] Aw. (laughs)
- I'm gonna go up and
give one point each to
my sister and her husband.
- Does that, does that work?
(Erika claps)
- You both come back up,
you've both leveled up,
but in fact all of you after
this fight feel yourself,
you know that, like, once
you go to sleep and rest up,
whatever happened in here,
you are fundamentally different now.
(Jasper sighs)
- Thank you. (laughs)
- [Brennan] Of course.
- Could we please get out of the bear?
- I still think that
with just a little bit
of arrangement, we could put some moss
in the corner over there-
- Mama,
we cannot stay here.
- That this would make a-
- Lila vomits everywhere.
- I can literally,
I can see it starting to decay.
Please, can we-
- I'm just still holding Lila
and I'm just gonna start leaving the bear.
I'm leaving the bear.
- [Jasper] Yeah, I'm following.
- Everybody, follow me.
- Lila, you dropped your tongues.
- Follow me through
the eyeball, everybody.
- It's okay, I got them.
- [Jasper] Just slide through.
- Just slide through the eyeball.
- Oh, you guys take the little,
like, whoop-whoop out through the front.
- [Jasper] Wow.
- Down the snout, down the teeth.
- I'm looking over at my sister,
Did you get in through the eye?
- Yeah, I-
- Nice.
- [Aabria] Nice.
- And then-
- Nice.
- I cut a hole and then
I went up into its brain.
- I jumped in through the
hole and was in the heart
and the chipmunks got
me, I thought. (sighs)
- There were chipmunks,
were there chipmunks?
- I'm gonna give you four
of my leftover Lay On Hands
- I'm gonna give you two my leftover.
(group laughs)
- [Aabria] Interesting, interesting.
- I'm also really hurt.
(group laughs)
- Oh, but you get to keep a face.
- But I got candy, too.
(group laughs)
- You do love candy.
You all see the way that this
bear sort of settled down,
its head between its paws.
There's a little, it's not
a burrow, it's not a cave,
There's a little, it's not
a burrow, it's not a cave,
but you know that as night
begins to fall in these woods,
a bear resting in the center
is a pretty good shelter
to hide beneath and get a little rest.
- I think for what it's worth,
Thorn turns around, kind of, like,
lays a hand on the,
like, snoot of the bear-
- [Rashawn] Snoot.
- And just, (sighs) brighter than the sun,
swifter than the wind.
- And also to you.
- Sorry, I was having a,
yep, yeah, thank you, yeah.
- Yeah, I'm gonna, I
think I walk out of here
with the rest of the family.
- I think everybody just needs a rest.
- I agree.
Do you, I know some of what
my sister's capable of doing, as well.
Do you, I don't know how I phrase it.
I was like, do you have any power left
in you for healing, or no?
- I believe I've got,
healing, no, I mean, I
gave you the last of my-
- [Brennan] I understand.
- Points, and, I mean,
the best we could do is have a rest.
I have Sanctuary, but
I don't think that'll,
it'll ward off anybody who may come
and attack us while we're asleep.
- Would you mind putting that on Lila?
- Oh, no, not at all.
Lila, come here, come
here, my favorite niece.
- She's just like, 1,000 yard stare.
- Okay, look at you, you did so good,
and you can tell me
everything that happened.
Get it out of your head, lay it on me.
Lay it on Auntie.
- I don't know.
I don't know.
- You don't know?
- I don't know, face?
(group laughs)
- Face, I take the face
from you and I look at it,
and I fold it up.
(group laughs)
- You know, if you treat that,
that you can have it and save it
and use it as a bit of a mask.
It's a fun little party trick, ooh.
- (under breath) Nightmare.
- Okay, Mother.
(group laughs)
- I look over at my sister and go,
(whisper) She's forgotten that she
taught us how to make face masks.
- I fold it up and I put it away,
and I hold your hands and
I cast Sanctuary on you,
so that anybody who
tries to attack you has
to make a wisdom saving throw.
So you are warded, essentially.
I'm gonna say, you did,
I don't know if you did good or bad,
'cause I-
- I did pretty good.
- [Rashawn] You did, good, okay.
- Yeah.
- Well, not every day is
gonna be like that, you know?
We prepare for the
worst that could happen,
and the worst has happened,
and you're still alive.
- Is that, is that what
everybody's always talking about,
like, that happened to
Uncle Thorn and to Nana,
and, like, when people say
that they, like, saw things, and the,
the Blue,
and also danger,
and, yeah.
- Yeah, I was really hoping
that we would tell you this
when you were much older.
I would hope that you live in a world
where none of these horrors
you'd ever have to see,
but, yes, I'm not gonna bullshit you.
It's gonna be bad.
But let's just have a little bit of peace,
breathe it out, let go of all of that,
and you don't have to see faces
or tongues again if you
really don't want to.
- Sweetie, and I'm just,
like, go side by side
with my sister
(gently chiming music)
and just be like, sweetie,
you want to know the biggest,
scariest secret of them all?
The truth is that the Blue, monsters,
the dust in the air, all that,
the real reason that grownups
talk about this like
they have a big secret is
because we're scared, too,
because as much as you
think we know everything,
the biggest secret of
all is we mostly don't.
And that's what we hide from you.
The thing we hide from the kids isn't
that we know everything,
it's that we don't know everything
'cause we don't want you to be scared.
But the truth is, there's
more about the Blue
that is a mystery than there
is things that we know.
We know it has to do
with the powers we have
that other animals don't have.
We know that it has to
do with why there are
so many strange things in the forest.
But
the people who have tried
their hardest to find answers
aren't around anymore.
(gently chiming music continues)
- I don't like the level of
honesty that's happening here.
- Shut up, Grandma.
(gently chiming music stops)
- Oh, do not tell
your grandmother to shut up-
- Don't talk to
your grandmother that way.
- What did you say?
- Give me that candy.
(group chastising Lila)
Give it to me.
- Rude language.
- Give it to me, you're done.
- [Brennan] You have been raised better
than that-
- [Rashawn] Don't you do it.
- Don't, not with the
wrapper, spit it out.
Lila, you've done so good.
You have, no, well, I'm gonna-
- I am up a tree, look at me, everybody,
I'm up a tree,
(whisper) I'm a good distraction,
- You know, you've never
behaved this way-
- [Siobhan] I'm up a tree!
for your father.
- (silent) You're not my mom.
(audibly) I ate it.
- And as your family
dynamics return to something
that has broken-
- These bad-a*s kids.
- That has broken the sort of tension
of the truth of the
stoats and of your family
and of this forest and this place,
we'll move away as you guys seek rest
and rejuvenation in the shadow of the bear
that you put to rest.
And that's where we're
going to end tonight.
(group cheers)
(group claps)
- Oh, my God!
- We'll see you next
time on "Burrow's End."
- [Rashawn] What?
(group chitters)
- Truly to describe to you
what has just taken place would be a tale
we might not ever have enough time for.
- We were in the innards of a bear.
I was at the brain.
- What?
- Yep, like I said, not enough time.
- It's not that the Blue is some monster
or some, like, strange incursion,
but the Blue is everywhere,
it is everything.
- You may have seen one of those things,
those creatures, the monsters,
but I've seen many, many of them.
- Ugh, I don't know, ugh, I don't like it.
Oh, something's gonna change.
- The forest is scary.
- What?
This is not what we expected right now.
- Look up to Dad.
- But Dad made your life really bad.
- I feel bad I'm asking you
to step away from your family.
- But you're my family, too.
If something happened to you,
and, I mean, I love them,
but what if I was left
all alone without you?
- You see, deep in the woods-
- What?
- Bigger than the bear?
- It must be, must be.
- We're gonna fight the Blue
and we're gonna make it go away forever.
- Well, let's put a pin in that.
- I just push, like, my whole essence,
like, out towards this
creature in just blind fury.
- [Siobhan] I'm here to defend you.
- What?
- I'll beat them all up.
- You see your litter
frolicking amongst a hundred,
hundred other stoats, ones
that you don't recognize,
that you don't know,
and everything is just a little different
and a little corrupted.
- What?
- Jaysohn, shut up.
- But that means everything's
a little different,
and that includes you and
that includes your family.
- The forest is enormous, it's dangerous.
You can't guarantee safety.
You can't guarantee that you get
to hold onto everybody forever.
- I'm gonna do everything I
can to keep this family safe.
- [Aabria] Follow your
instincts towards the light.
(dramatic orchestral music)
(dramatic orchestral music continues)
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20x02 - Bearing the Scars
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A tabletop role-playing game show produced by and broadcast on Dropout and created and generally hosted by Brennan Lee Mulligan as the show's regular Dungeon Master.
A tabletop role-playing game show produced by and broadcast on Dropout and created and generally hosted by Brennan Lee Mulligan as the show's regular Dungeon Master.