02x09 - F Bombs Away

[bunniefuu]

Previously on
House of Villains...

Oh!

Kandy is Supervillain,
everybody!

I had this idea to create
some sort of fake advantage.

Congratulations, villain.

This is definitely the most
villainous thing

that has been done on this show
thus far.

Kandy, who are you
gonna piss boff first?

Victoria.

And Larsa.

- [scoffing]
- Cool.

Wes, your time will come,
my love.

The fourth villain

to be banished from the house...

Victoria.

Sashay away.

- [buzzer sounding]
- Adios. Bye.

♪

Okay, villains, before
I send you back to the house,

I want to do
one little exercise.

Oh, hell no.

Please rank yourselves in order

from most villainous
to least villainous.

I think I’m close to the top.

I was the first Supervillain.

Don’t bring your pterodactyl
looking a*s over here.

Jessie, you sure?

Jessie don’t need to be up
here, but whatever.

So, I guess we’re locking it in.

Kandy is the most villainous,

and Teresa
is the least villainous.

I’m sure you’re all wondering
why I had you do this.

This is actually a surprise
double banishment.

- Whoa.
- You serious?

♪

This is "House of Villains,"

and we are searching
for TV’s greatest Supervillain.

Not reality TV’s greatest friend
or greatest house mom.

So, Teresa...

unfortunately,
since the house decided

you were the least villainous...

you are now banished.

So please,
step over to the chair.

- ’Kay.
- Jessie, that’s ----ed up,

because I kept telling you
to go over there!

I didn’t lie,
I didn’t backstab anyone,

and if I had to be voted off
for being the least villainous,

I don’t mind taking
that title.

At least, I can walk out of here
with my head up high.

You’re not the least villainous
here, my love.

You have the room
all to yourself.

Mother Teresa
is leaving the building.

I guess I’ll do the honors.

Teresa, you are the lesser
of all evils.

- [buzzer sounding]
- [Teresa shrieking]

Oh!

- You are a nasty piece of work.
- Why?

You are a nasty piece of work.

You realize it’s because
she wanted me out, right?

This is a nasty piece of work.

You know you supposed to be
over there, Jessie.

All right, go get out of here.

I am traumatized.

How could you do this
to Mother Teresa?

[somber music]

What the [bleep] just happened?

I am traumatized.

- Oh, my goodness.
- Baby, I need a ----ing shot

- after that.
- I gotta get

a drink in my system.

Whoa!

Jessie, you should feel
like sh-- right now,

because I kept telling your a*s
to go down there!

Yo, to be fair,
I thought that

they were gonna make
the least villainous

the villain of the week,
right there and then.

I didn’t think that.
I didn’t think that.

And Teresa was Mother Teresa
for a reason here.

Teresa, she wasn’t lying.
She was being honest.

I hate that Teresa’s not here,
but I’m here to win,

and I’m here to be as villainous

as I need to be to make it to
the very end.

Okay, but do you understand,
we just went from eight to six.

Tomorrow might be a ----ing
Villain of the Week,

and if you’re not Villain of the
Week, guess what?

- You’re on the Hit List.
- Tomorrow is gonna matter.

So, why y’all
so ----ing mopey?

We ain’t mopey.
We just shocked.

Let’s call a spade a spade.

We just lost two people
and they ain’t us.

We’re playing a game. Buck up.

Enjoy your ----ing selves.

I like that. I like that.

I think we’ve
learned our lesson,

I think that
we need to start acting...

Like ----ing villains?

And actually just be how we are.

We’re a little closer
to being $200,000 richer.

Bravo.

And this jewelry
got you acting different.

I ain’t never seen
this mother----er

talk like this in my life.

Kandy, turn around and look.

Wes has been so chill
this entire time,

but now that we are getting down
to the nitty-gritty,

Wes is showing us who he is,

a b*tch
that can’t be trusted.

- You seem a little...
- Miss me with that sh--?

...shocked out there.

Well, I think
everybody was, but--

I was telling you to go
towards the end,

because I thought they
were gonna make

the least villainous one
Supervillain of the Week.

Well, I’m happy
you listened to me,

and I’m happy
I didn’t listen to you.

Right. Listen, real quick.

Tomorrow’s gonna be
a challenge.

Wes is now fighting to be
Supervillain of the Week.

Larsa or New York,
Supervillain of the Week?

- Please.
- Right.

And Safaree sucks
at the ----ing games.

- Straight. A little left.
- Ah, [bleep]. Ah!

It needs to be between me
and you, because guess what?

Out of six people... [bleep].

Out of five people,
three will go on the Hit List.

- I got your back.
- And I’m not doing that

- before the ----ing finale.
- I know. I know.

So play hard tomorrow, because
I’m gonna go just as hard,

because one of us
needs to be Supervillain.

I see what everybody thinks of
my standing inside this house.

I have to win Supervillain
this week

because it’s the only 100%
guarantee that I’ll be safe.

What do you want to do?

- Not be on the Hit List.
- No, no, no. I get that.

But what I’m saying is,
if I can help you win,

is that beneficial
for your game?

Yeah, sure. You know me,

I don’t give
a [bleep] about anyone else.

- But you’re-- I’m good?
- Yeah.

- Well, it still stands.
- Absolutely, yes, yes.

- We just talk about--
- Yes, yes, yes.

Well, I guess I’m gonna go
to my new room. Wes...

You went through it way worse
than me, obviously.

What you’ve been through
the last 36-plus hours is

very, very challenging,
but we’re one step further.

And you and I have proven
a lot to each other.

Since you acknowledge
that I had such a crazy day,

can you help me bring some bags
in the room?

Yeah, let’s go.

The House of Villains is way
worse than being on Housewives.

We’re sleeping without doors,

we have no privacy in the room.

Literally, the only privacy
you have is in the bathroom,

and when you’re sharing a room,

your time is limited
in the bathroom.

And I do like to have
my privacy at times.

I’m gonna put these here.

Wow.

- The-- Yeah.
- [Tiffany laughing]

If we don’t win, we’re ----ing
done. The game’s over.

Look, we just stay even-keeled,
stay focused.

Oh, and we gotta go
right to bed.

Because of tomorrow morning?

Yeah, we haven’t
been sleeping good, and--

Why don’t you go
to the other room?

- It’s bad luck.
- Absolutely, it’s bad luck.

- All right.
- These fools switch beds,

because they don’t know that
it’s a curse.

- Aha!
- ----ing idiots.

I knew I liked you, Wes.

Wes found an immunity card.

I read the letter.

He can use the card anywhere
he wants, anytime he wants.

Where did he find it?

By a chess piece, apparently.
On the floor.

Yo, Wes, what’s up?

Why you ain’t tell me, my G?
I thought we was cool.

I thought we was locked in.

He showed it to me
the other day.

- Wow.
- And that’s why he’s chilling.

I couldn’t put him
up on the Hit List.

- Because you knew.
- Because I already knew,

I’ve known that he’s had
a ----ing immunity card.

He doesn’t want me to tell
anyone that he has that.

If everybody knows, then no one

will waste their time
putting him up.

I’m telling Safaree about
the letter before Jessie,

because I think that Safaree and
Wes are really good friends,

And if Safaree finds out that

Wes did not tell him
about the secret letter,

baby, their little alliance?
It’s no more.

Hm.

Don’t even mention
anything about it.

Yeah.

♪

The spirit of Vicky is still
in this house.

Oh!

I could finally take this down.

No, no.
That’s bad luck now.

Even though you’re mad
I didn’t vote for you,

I know you were gunning for me.

Go [bleep] yourself.

There’s no more feelings.

There’s no more looking out.

It’s every villain
for themself.

-[bell tolling]
-Good morning, villains.

And just like that,
we’re down to six.

It’s time to get ready
for your next battle royale.

And this one’s
gonna be the b*mb.

Be ready to leave in one hour.

There’s a b*mb that’s
gonna go off?

Damn, how are you feeling
post-banishment of

your housewife partner?

I feel horrible.

It’s weird sleeping in her room,
like, in her bed.

Yeah, you feel so horrible.
You moved into her room

swiftly, right away,
comfortably.

That was our plan.
I said, hey, I’m gonna--

That was the plan
when she was here.

She wasn’t here,
so you should have been sad.

I was, but then I felt
I would be closer to her

if I was in her room.

Damn, that was quick.

I guess Larsa is a traitor.

Can one of us win
the challenge today?

I’m one of the bros.
I thought you were a housewife,

but now I feel like I’m getting
converted to one of the bros.

[rock music playing]

Okay, bear, it’s time for
your daddy to clock in.

Oh, Teresa, girl, we have got to
get you out of this house.

Come on, let’s go.

Dear Luis,

we loved having your girl.

"...turn to sender."
All right, girl. Jesus.

♪ I will always remember ♪

Okay. Ugh.

Teresa, I love you, girl.

I’m going to miss you.

I will see you
back in Jersey. Ah!

♪ Yeah ♪

Victoria, you are never
going to get invited

to my dog birthday party
ever again.

Bye, b*tch.

[dogs barking]

Do you need me to do it?

♪ Good morning, yeah ♪

Good morning, Kandy.

Girl, I’m so bloated right now.

- Bloated?
- You don’t know

what I’m hiding under this coat.

I cannot believe that happened.

A double banishment.

I had a feeling it was going
to happen at some point.

Think about it. We’ve been here
fighting all this time.

We’re that much closer
to the win.

Everyone’s always like, oh,
don’t go against the house,

you know, with your votes or...

And for the most part,
I’ve been doing

whatever the [bleep]
I’ve been wanting to do.

You’ve been so individual
with this sh--

So I’m just like, you know,

it’s been working this far,
so let’s see.

That’s how I am, too.
I feel like I have to do

what I need to do for me first,

and then if it lines up with
the house,

then that’s a plus.

I feel like I just saw
something, but I’m gonna hush.

I haven’t been up at all.

At all, Kandy.

----ing huge target
on me right now to go up.

Hello, villains.

It’s now time for your next
battle royale.

This one’s gonna be a blast.

I get a pilot seat.

Last night was the first time
I saw Jessie’s nasty side

because he wasn’t supposed to be
standing over next to me.

No.

Did y’all hear anything
from, um, Kandy?

No, what? Tell us.

Did Kandy tell you anything?

- Nothing.
- Tell us.

Somebody found something.

- What?
- Enough said.

The Not-Blocker
is back in play?

That’s what I’m hearing.

I haven’t brought it up because
I just want to...

observe the situation.

See if it’s even
really true or not.

I don’t want to really partake
in these conversations.

I’m smart enough to align with

the strongest player,
I believe, in this house.

I trust Wes, and I’m just gonna

go with whatever
he says at this point.

I don’t feel like Kandy’s
making it up.

I feel like they could’ve
made it up.

Oh, and then told Kandy,
and she’s spreading it.

Yes, as a ploy, but...

Kandy is saying...

she saw it.

Can we listen
to some death metal?

Uh, what?

What are we going
to do to, um, blindfold...

golf Cart, where you gotta
sit with someone

and you gotta be blindfolded?

You think they would repeat
a challenge from last season?

They did with the comedy thing.

Oh, that’s
a good point, Safaree.

[ominous music]

Well, this is
quite the setup.

What are we going to do?

Oh, they’re bombs.

I can leave my purse in here?

Okay.

Hi!

Whoa!

Oh, I get it.

Welcome to your most mountainy
Battle Royale challenge yet.

[bird shrieking]

We are close to the end,

and it is more important
than ever to win.

The winner of today’s challenge
will become Supervillain,

but this time,
they will only nominate

two people
to the Hit List.

- Excuse you?
- That’s right.

There is no
redemption challenge.

- There’s what?
- There is no reward.

There will be no more immunity
going forward.

There are no free rides
to the finals.

The only way to guarantee
safety is to win.

This really stinks,
because I had this game wired,

and now,
I’m highly susceptible.

I need to change my strategy

of getting in the middle
of the pack.

Now is about the time to just
straight-up win.

♪

A true villain
doesn’t give a [bleep]

about anyone or anything,

So this challenge is called
"Zero [Bleep] to Give."

Here’s how it works.

Each of you have 25 F-bombs,
or if you will, [bleep].

One at a time, you will
slingshot your bombs

over the barrier.

I shall demonstrate.

- [b*mb booming]
- Aah! Ooh!

[Villains exclaiming]

What are you guys so--

That was good.
That was good.

Well, looky here,
I’m not the only one

packing firepower
here today, huh?

If it doesn’t go over
the barrier,

then you have to go get
the b*mb and try it again.

But of course,
we couldn’t make it easy.

At some point in the game,
you will hear a siren.

[siren blaring]

At that point in time,

you will leave your slingshot
and find a pile

of five F-U Bombs.

This time, F-U stands for...

Oh, it’s just [bleep] you.

You will be able to distribute
your F-U Bombs

to your competitors
to slow them down.

First player
to get rid of all their [bleep],

and have zero [bleep] to give,
will become our latest,

and perhaps
most consequential Supervillain.

Does everyone understand
the rules,

and what the word
"consequential" means?

Yeah!

All right, everybody,
take your spots.

Is this too good to be true?

Like, this legitimately
could be a "Challenge" game.

This is my world,
and the likelihood of a win,

at this point, is very high.

I want the bragging rights.
I’m competitive.

My pedigree,
my kids are winners.

I just like to win.

It’s crucial that
I win this challenge,

due to the fact that
just moments before,

everybody was completely fine
with me going home.

Don’t bring your pterodactyl
looking a*s over here.

I feel like you’re less
villainous than me, though.

I can’t wait till you go
on the Hit List, Jessie.

On your mark!

- Go!
- [horn blaring]

[Tchaikovsky’s
"1812 Overture" playing]

Oh! Yeah!

Look at those special effects!

Oh, Kandy, good one.

- [jazzy "1812 Overture"]
- [bleep]! Damn it!

Go get it, New York,
you’re doing great.

- Oh, my gosh!
- [epic music playing]

Right now,
I’m just Forrest Gump.

Run, New York, run!

[Tiffany exclaiming]

This is serious sh--

Look at the money we’re
spending on these explosions!

Oh, I got it! Oh!

Good one!

Jessie’s are flying!

Me and Wes are leading
the head of the pack.

I think I have a halfway
decent shot at winning this,

as long as people
don’t stack my board

with all of their
red F.U. Bombs.

Wes, nice job!

The winner of this whole thing
is not gonna have

the luxury of ever missing
a single b*mb.

[Bleep]!

My strategy is essentially

just to be more methodical,

and ensure that I have


- I think Jessie’s winning.
- Oh, [bleep].

Didn’t think this would be
such a workout, did you

[coughing]

Baby, call the ----ing medic.

[siren wailing]

Place all five
of your F.U. Bombs.

You can use these bombs
to screw anybody over.

Wes is getting all
my F.U. Bombs,

because Joel said there
are no more immunity idols,

meaning that letter
is now voided.

And guess what, you’re also not
gonna win Supervillain. Bye.

Damn, New York, okay.

Safaree, contemplating what to
do with this [Bleep] You b*mb.

This guy ain’t did nothing
this whole time

we’ve been in this house.

Let him feel something,
let him sweat.

It’s great for the game,
it’s great for the culture.

Wes just got
a lot of [Bleep] You Bombs.

They’re putting all their bombs
on Wes’ platform.

He’s sort of like
my meat shield.

As long as he’s still around
in this game,

it seems as though
he’ll always be targeted first.

It’s a great reason
to keep him around.

On the other hand,
taking him out of the game

would be a phenomenal
feather in the cap

for being at the finals.

Jessie is being very diplomatic

and distributing his
[Bleep] You Bombs to everybody.

But first and foremost,
all I have to do is just

win this challenge,
and the power is mine.

Nobody seems to be worried
about Jessie.

Only got three
[Bleep] You Bombs.

I’ve been sabotaged worse
than anybody else,

but perhaps the second best
outcome is that

Jessie wins, because he is
the easiest to manipulate.

Kandy, wow, you’ve got
a lot of [Bleep] Yous.

I mean, I get it, I was
Supervillain last week.

Safaree only got four.

And Larsa, only one [Bleep] You.
Same thing with New York.

All right, here we go.
Second half.

On your mark, get set, go!

This is for Supervillain, guys.

Wes isn’t even trying anymore.

Jessie’s almost completed with
his [Bleep] You Bombs.

[Tiffany exclaiming]

Safaree has slowed down
quite a bit.

I’m coughing, hacking.

With the weather
and it being so cold,

we were in the mountains,
so the air just was

feeling a little,
like, thinner.

Yo, what the...

Then, I just lost my rhythm.

It’s definitely
holding me back.

Jessie is way ahead.

Oh, [bleep]!

The only harness I’m used to

coming into contact with
is my bra.

Go get it there, New York,
go get it!

I didn’t know how to freaking
use it to launch no damn b*mb.

- Finally.
- Oh, sh--.

Jessie only has
five bombs left.

I think Jessie’s gonna win
the whole thing.

Here is my little puppet,
winning this game.

Jessie’s got two left, guys.

And then will hopefully do
my bidding for me.

This is it, Jessie’s last b*mb.

Jessie has launched
his last b*mb.

[Bleep] you, Jessie.

My lungs ain’t lunging.

Congrats, Jessie.

You have no [bleep]
left to give,

and you are the Supervillain.

Mr. PEC-tacular is
Supervillain of the Week!

You have more power in this
game than anyone has had yet,

because you get to choose
two people up for banishment.

Look out, villains.

I’m the only one
that matters now.

Did it happen?

[dramatic score playing]

- Kept a [Bleep] You b*mb?
- I did.

Damn, I should have
kept one, too.

Oh, that’s setting the tone.

Home sweet home.

Kandy, I know you haven’t ran

like that in your adult life.

I’m exhausted.

New York,
let’s talk real quick.

- Where do you want to sit?
- I’ll sit here.

Nobody in here give a [bleep],
because we at the wits’ end.

We’re not at the wits’ end,
we’re at our wits’ end.

[cackling]

Are you putting me up
or not, Jessie?

I have an idea,
I’m just letting you know.

I’m not going to tell anybody

this potential plan,
other than you.

If you don’t put me on there,
who you gonna put on there?

I would be one of them.

Why would you do
something so stupid?

You’re right.

And that’s where

your word
is what I have to rely on.

Oh, so you need--
Now, I get it.

You better track with this
or this conversation is over.

You’re putting yourself there.

What are you doing?

Nominating two people is
a chance to make two enemies.

If I put myself up,
if things go right,

I’d make zero people mad
inside the house.

And even though New York
wanted me gone yesterday,

I’m hoping to get her on my side
by giving her some insight

on my pec-tacular plan.

So if you go up,
you just make sure

that I have voted you safe.

That’s all you need, right?

Who do you think I’m going to
be sitting next to?

- On the Hit List?
- Yeah.

Safaree?

No, why would I do that?

- Kandy?
- No.

This is you putting me up,
though, right?

- No.
- Oh, Larsa.

No.

-Wes? Wes.
-Yeah.

Right.

Oh, I’ve been wanting him gone.

Oh, hell no.

This thin-lipped mother----er
thinks he can win against Wes?

Wes and I have
a secret alliance.

We know each other
from a previous show.

He had my back and I have his.

Do you understand
what I just told you, though?

Yes. Put yourself
on the Hit List.

- Uh-huh.
- You’re gonna go against Wes,

and you need votes
to keep you safe.

- Right.
- I-- I got that.

Because the alternative is...

- I would go up.
- Right.

Versus anybody else
in the house.

And that won’t be good,

because I don’t think
I would be coming back.

Right.

Here, let’s sit down.

Every single time
a Supervillain is crowned,

they might as well put
a shadow crown on my head.

It more than likely means that
I’m gonna be helping choose

the people that will
go on the Hit List,

finding myself safe, enjoying
the view from the stage.

I trust you wholeheartedly.
I don’t even have to ask,

- do I?
- No.

At this point, I only have you.

That’s one of the reasons
why I’m kind of depressed

about this whole situation.

Assuming it’s like last season,

the winner of the final
Battle Royale will get to choose

one person to take with them
to the end, and then

the last three will battle
it out for the third spot.

That means that this is the last
chance to vote out a big threat.

So, if we put up Kandy
next to a pawn,

then it’s almost guaranteed
that we get out a big threat.

You’re not the easiest person
here to beat,

but you’re also not the hardest.

I think Kandy is impossible.

Listen, every single person
that is left here

is going to vote for her.

That would be who
I think the target should be.

[sighs] I don’t think
I can put her up.

I’m being dead serious with you.
Um...

Kandy’s definitely a threat
because everybody loves her.

But Wes is a bigger threat and
if I put myself up against Wes,

I know I can swing the house
to vote Wes out.

- This is-- this is our shot.
- Yeah.

But I don’t need to
keep pitching you.

You don’t need to sit around

- and think about this.
- No.

Like, I can sleep
soundly tonight.

I don’t even need to show up
to the ----ing thing tomorrow.

- Right, right.
- I’m that good.

- You got it.
- Okay.

I’m looking at you in the eye.

Say it again.

- Yes.
- What?

You’re good.

Look at Wes outside
trying to work Jess.

He wanted to win
the challenge today.

Well, he didn’t.

He would’ve
shaken everything up.

You were in
the line of fire today.

It was not easy for me, Wes.

- I’m so glad you won.
- No, I know.

So, you two getting along still?

Yeah, why wouldn’t we be?

Do you wanna rethink that,
Jessie?

[tense showdown music]

What? What do you mean?

[laughing] Oh!

Oh, I just better be quiet then.

[slurping]

What?
You got something in your eye?

Tell him.
I think it’s a brilliant plan.

Well, now we better get talking.

[New York laughing]

Do you see him ----ing me?

I see him...

trying to [bleep] you.

Yeah.

A little somethin’.

Jessie,
you might as well come clean.

With what?

With the information
you gave me earlier.

Oh... [sighs]

I knew there was a slight chance

that New York was
gonna screw me over here.

It took ten seconds!

What game is New York playing?

It’s like she’s a plant to just

create as much chaos
as possible.

That’s kind of fishy.

Hi, Kandy.

[chuckles] Oh!

The plot thickens.

There’s a lot going on
in this house.

What’s up, y’all?

Did you two wanna
have your conversation?

Oh, you didn’t
speak to Jessie yet?

I can talk to Jessie
another time.

No, I love it because
all the sh-- that I stirred up,

I need to make an exit.

[laughing] [bleep] me.

There she goes!

Maybe I should talk
to Jessie right now.

- Thank you, Wes.
- Uh-huh. [chuckles]

I can tell something is afoot.

I am a trophy.

My name stays in
people’s mouths,

so I just need to be crafty

while I figure out a way to
get out of this situation.

But it doesn’t matter, ’cause
I’ve got a plan B, C, D,

so on and so forth.

"...if I were to end up
on the Hit List,

"I’d be able to remove
myself from it."

Obviously,
now the letter is voided.

Kandy, do you believe
that he had this?

I read it with my own two eyes.

What?

What?

I’ve shown Wes my loyalty
time and time again.

And seriously, Kandy,
if we’re working together,

why are you not
telling me everything?

It’s rubbing me
the wrong way because

lying by omission
is still lying.

Listen, man, [bleep]
whatever y’all talking about.

- [laughs]
- Let me tell you what’s crazy.

"Whatever immunity
is out there...

Ah! Stop, we were just
talking about that right now.

We were literally
just talking about that.

"...is-- Means nothing
anymore..."

- No.
- Why would he tell you

- and not them?
- Because he didn’t want me to

put him on the Hit List
’cause he had an immunity card,

so he was feeling safe.

Jessie choosing to sabotage me
is an irrelevant variable.

It’s more important
for me to prioritize

not having this fake immunity
blow up in my face.

Getting out of sticky situations
using my brain and my mouth

is the ultimate turn-on for me.

I thought we were close
and you’d tell me.

- You see what I mean?
- But here’s the thing.

He literally-- He was like,

"Don’t let anyone know
and I will give it to you."

The fact that we found out
from somebody else--

- I’m just finding out today.
- Say you swear to God.

- It’s crazy.
- Yes, I swear.

- No, no one knew.
- He just told me.

- You didn’t know that?
- No one knew but me.

I would have never
in a million years

guessed that Kandy
would have lied to me.

I would’ve expected it from Wes,

but I did not
see this coming at all.

The only person I can trust
inside this house is myself.

♪

- Larsa, what you want?
- I want a bite of this.

You wanna share with me?

Girl, you are not
a greedy little person.

Look at us, learning each other.

No, I know you.

Us knowing our energy off. Wow.

Yeah, and I’m glad I’m able

to talk to you about it
like a ----ing man.

It might be time to "come clean"

about my biggest lie,
the fake immunity.

At the very least,
I need to convince

Safaree and Jessie that
I’m not working against them.

Ever since the day that
Bobby Lytes joined us,

I have been living
a lie of omission.

Bobby Lytes came to the house,

and you think that was
for sh--s and giggles?

I have an announcement
to make to you guys.

I am joining the competition.

- I’m kidding.
- [all laughing]

He was walking around
interviewing people,

looking for who was
the "realest" in the house.

Ultimately,
at the end of that night,

he gave me this.

It basically says that
if I’m ever in the Hit List,

that any votes cast
against me will be moot.

Where did he give it to you at?

He told me to use this
on my biggest enemy.

On my daughter’s life,
no one in that house knows this.

So, I’ve had this thing that
I couldn’t tell anybody about,

and I hope you guys
can respect that.

Can I see it?

I told Kandy that I found it
underneath the chess piece.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I don’t know who’s
drinking the Kool-Aid here,

but sure as sh-- ain’t me.

’Cause it sounds like
a sugary drink,

and that would
never go in my body.

Miss me with that sh--,
you bozo clown.

Why are you making that face?

Only one of us lied.

By omission.

Please see it
from my standpoint.

I’m trying.

But why do you feel like
you couldn’t tell us?

Because it’s two of you,
and I can’t tell one of you,

and two people is, like,
a large percentage of the house,

and it’s like, it’s--
I should be allowed to.

We all should be allowed to
have some secrets in this game.

[Jessie sighing]

Jessie is just
grasping at straws

to come up with any reason
to justify throwing me in.

This guy is more scared of me
than he has been of anyone else,

and one way or another,

I’m gonna be the reason
why he does not win.

Would you guys be mad if
I fell asleep on the couch?

- No.
- I need a massage.

- My neck hurts.
- I heard Wes is a masseuse.

He is not. He couldn’t even
throw the bowling ball over.

They were bombs,
not bowling ba*ls.

[both laughing]

Dude, everyone wakes up here
so early.

What time do you think it is?

Do you think old Bucko
changed his mind?

Who, Kandy? Bro...

[sighing] Girl...

Oh, this shirt gonna be...

Get wrinkled today.

Bro...

What’d he say?

First of all,
Wes is a g*dd*mn lie. Period.

He’s not-- he’s lying.
I never gave him anything.

That’s what I ----ing thought.

And another good point.

How dumb is he to lie when you
can just call and verify,

and I’m here
to tell you he’s lying?

Do I need to fly back to L.A.
and pop Wes one good time?

That whole sh-- was made up.

What a shock.

Wes lied to cover his own tail.

Okay, cool.

But I’m the supervillain,

so if me and the old pecs wanna
put an end to this right now,

you best believe we can.

Game over.

Well, we can confront him.

We’ll be like, all right,
so your story was a lie.

[Wes gargling]

Honestly, I wouldn’t
act on it right away.

How come?

Sometimes, it’s good
to just hold things

in your memory bank

and you don’t have to confront
every situation right away.

I’m telling you, right now,
you have all the power.

You have the advantage.

We wait, and then up there,

on the main stage, you strike.

Mm. So fresh and so clean.

How you doing, Kandy, sweetie?

Hi, flower.

Did you sleep in the room next
to me,

or did you sleep on
the other side of the house?

No, across from you.

- You did? You’re so quiet.
- Yeah?

I didn’t hear you
even breathing.

Hi.

Well, how are you feeling today

about everything
that happened last night?

I’m losing fast.

And I gave you my biggest piece
of information in the game,

and you used it
to stir up the pot.

Yeah, because I needed you
out of here,

but I would hope that people
would be a man of their words.

Please have Kandy Muse
sashay away today.

Don’t [bleep] with me, Wes.

Damn, it’s freezing in here.

Bro...

Do you feel like he would put
you on the Hit List tonight?

I think
I’m a strong possibility.

He could also just put you up

because you’re
the biggest threat.

Quite the conundrum
I found myself in.

I had a plan to put myself up
against Wes.

I told New York,
she ratted me out.

Well, New York,
guess where you’re going.

But who is second?

Is it gonna be Kandy?

Or am I gonna
pull the trigger on Wes?

Thanks, New York.

♪

I am somehow, yet again,
sitting alone in the VIP.

Okay, villains,
it’s time to get ready

for your Hit List nominations.

It’s coming.
It’s coming fast.

Listen, here’s the deal.

If it’s exactly
like last season,

and there’s five people,
and there’s a game,

and I win the game and I’m
allowed to choose one person,

I’m choosing you.

On your daughter, Lucy?

Well, I would like
to not swear on my daughter.

So would I, but I would
appreciate it

if you did right now because
we’re in the midst of it all.

Well...

yes.

Okay, cool. Likewise.

But, um, and that’s on your...

On my daughter, Lucy.

I’m going back and forth,
and I have an internal struggle

with the fact that
I gave Wes and Kandy my word

that I would never put them up.

However, this is
the House of Villains.

Sometimes being liked by
everybody isn’t a good thing.

Hi.

- Hi.
- Hello again.

Captain. There it is.

Yes. Look at you.

Woo! All right.

Welcome back to
the most fearsome room

in the House of Villains.

And not just
because it looks like

Bill Nye the Science Guy’s
sex dungeon.

PEC-tacular, you are
the supervillain of the week.

Please take your chair

and resist the urge
to do some squats.

The power is now
in your oily, greasy hands.

You get to choose
the two villains

in danger of being banished.

No redemption challenge.

Just a cold, hard vote.

So, Mr. PEC-tacular, who are
you going to PEC-nominate

and PEC-why?

Ugh.

Only one person that’s made it
into the final six

has come inside the stronghold

and never once
had to stand up there.

- Miss New York.
- [bleep] you.

Don’t look at me,
you son of a b*tch.

I’ll go without you staring.

I need wine and a straitjacket.

All right.

To keep me off of Jessie’s a*s.

What am I doing over here,
Jessie?

You’re a rat and haven’t been
on the Hit List. Not once.

Don’t no woman want no man with
a little tongue, okay?

- Okay.
- What’s wrong

with a little p*nis?

Don’t answer that. All right.

Jessie, whose day and possibly
financial future

will you ruin next?

This is literally the toughest
decision, obviously,

but I’m here for myself
in the House of Villains,

and I’ll flex
my villainous muscles right now.

Kandy.

I’m angry.
I’m ----ing upset.

I’m ready to retaliate.
I’m all the above.

I have all the ----ing
emotions right now.

Jessie, you ----ed with
the wrong one.

You and I have been friends

for the longest time
in this competition.

You looked at me in the eyes
last night and told me

you’re not gonna go up
on my Hit List.

You’re not a ----ing friend.

So, the difference between
that and myself--

Ain’t no ----ing difference.
You’re a fake-a*s b*tch.

You’re not a man.

You can’t stand ten toes
down on your decision.

You need to go under someone
else’s wings to make a decision

and that’s why I’m up here,
because just yesterday,

you weren’t gonna put me up,
but someone got in your ear.

I’ll leave empty-handed,
but so will you.

But that’s the difference.

I would still vote for you
if you’re in the finals.

- If you--
- Uh, yeah,

because I wouldn’t rip
the opportunity

out of your hand
the way I could have.

I didn’t put you on my Hit List

because you and I
had an understanding.

You’re a p*ssy-a*s b*tch.

- I told you to your face.
- You’re a fake-a*s b*tch.

You work out every day

to make up for the ----ing ba*ls
you don’t have, b*tch.

That’s why you look like an
uncircumcised chicken fetus.

You’re gonna fly right out
of here, you mother----er.

You ain’t gonna win.

You cannot be liked
by everybody.

♪ You’re not gonna win ♪

You both literally were
standing to my right,

saying I am the least
villainous person in the room.

Oh, he grew some ba*ls now

and I hope you grow ba*ls in the
plane ride empty back home

with no ----ing
cash prize, b*tch.

Yeah, [bleep] you, Jessie,
with your little tongue.

Let me tell you something,
Jessie.

You’re the game player.

I’m the game maker, b*tch.
Checkmate.

There we have it.

Villains, when we return to
this room,

one of these two folks
will be banished

and miss out on
their chance to win $200,000.

You can leave.

Oh, not yet.

There’s just one more surprise
here at House of Villains.

Sh--.

Next on "House of Villains..."

Every situation can either make
you a good guy

or make you a villain.

We are all here for a reason,

and we’re not gonna cry no more.

Your final
battle royale challenge.

Whoever can remain in contact
with this statue longest wins.

Why did I pick right here?

Are you touching my junk?

Almost.

Are you going back on the deal

where you swore on your family?

That’s what I’m asking you.