01x01 - If I Were a Carpenter

[bunniefuu]

used all my options worked up my dues laid all the cards there is nothing to

lose don't want tomorrow to be like today that's why I'm breaking away

[Music]

dearest Brenda we are now at sea I stood

on deck and watch the coast of England disappear into the distant mist who

knows what lies ahead a better future for us that is my fervent hope well

there's no more room for anything else except to see I love you and miss you

you all never [Music]

so right now if you don't want a drink would you want some crisps

we've got Scotch eggs I don't think he's firmly sea legs yet Dennis her

yeah well missing their Brenda you know I mean the door without edge bar great

just their chairs man I it could be humming second thoughts you

know about the boy have member we could go munch well sister I said listen actually you will not push house aren't

you wished it it's the only way you're gonna get it without laying the tax man spotter for once yeah well you know what

is here Halligan's penguins are Inland Revenue wall got one thing in common

the canal shove that builds up LaRoche [Laughter]

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well losing anyone when they get it in this wreck they can call this crap what

you've got a Sunland sticker on the back for you know you support a dead no no after what I've done what I brought I

bought it off did you know I was going to try and scrape it but I thought I may lose the bumper what bear what now don't

panic novel we'll all stick to the same story right what up they catch butterflies in Bavaria

[Music]

nostrums do you have anything to declare no just just a duty-free scotch

cigarettes came up in the back please yeah because it clears off doesn't work

what's this spirit level yeah I'll show you

what does it mean your walls not clumped

used all my options worked up my dues laid all the cards there is nothing to

lose don't want tomorrow to be like today that's why

breaking away

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take your love to town dearest friend

[Music] but it could almost be England except

with driving on the wrong side of the road dennis sends his love

rubbish stretches no utopias can anybody know the bloke policy it seems a bit of

a joke oops sorry it just went over a bump

which is surprising as Holland is very flat I love you and miss you

you're still the next point of interest never promise Brenner you keep in touch

keep in touch you what the first one oh darling you're gonna blow all your money on postage that she didn't wanna stay

come which is such it accepted it my name is best for us she said last night

seems a bit tearful never said that's not Nate your missus no well I must

admit I didn't give her much of a chance that you know I sneak out the back door and miradorn departure they push the car

door middle so it wouldn't make a noise he did a runner on your wife oh you don't know his Marjorie he's a right

board reactor I seen her break the ba*ls of innocent bystanders last time at chemo that didn't bother to

tell I was coming I just said I'm going on the newsagent spurt and get the sport

in Chronicle so you want that was a real up thing three months what you see when

you got back what wonderful 30

I've never worked abroad before I've been abroad like me and Brenda when de

menorca twice twice Y twice we liked it

the first thing what about is it you know I'm not really

sure flew nonstop from Neil Gosselin

what chopped nothing nothing just fell I

see if then sorry isn't it sorry about what look it just needs another push it should have took between

any mind you'll be glad in this one we get there man walking say brother Germany and this right mush

I've always wanted to push it clap dudes if I roam the Bavarian out

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right you better look at offline to get all this coffin

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you'll get three convenience goody Howe is just a tiny member working at the

hard-working back I'm gonna pass this night just outside staff engineer right when busted you need to come back in for

the crackpot well got to an in our choice feel is it Oh buddy I'll respond

huh well we're gonna want you know there's new gruff kablooie you know

ignore any o prime fascism in ours

yeah it's a misguided policy and I start the misguided and misconstrued Margera

life courses in Sioux City said I had nothing the opposition of visible to alternative of conservation with it no

no I was just Sheerness you Lucy agent honey I was a Bronco this day

nobody looks at me like I'm a ghost what's it for Orson is manifest

Frankford special abrecan arms my late Tippy's passed on this and I want some

electricians at mönchengladbach feisty that myself what chance does a golf open in his shop is this

yes do you need any British puzzled or I

have jobs for two only or you couldn't make a three chief all we're all right

then because this Larry isn't up it's just gonna be us you'll never look you where your last mr. Pfister Dennis man

I'm not a carpenter man did Yugi would work at school yes put a ring in a

carbonara never get away with it but we'll promise to stick together didn't wear and what's

your Brenda gonna think if you thought I'd left you in mönchengladbach uh somewhere well it's just her mother's

three musketeers huh one more all and sewed the rest high but we could all ikonn somewhere else is brickies just toss the best place kid

right it's got the old tone there to call all a good boss man Dennis reckons it's got the best brothel in Germany just think that postcard you can send

your loss dearest Brenda well I could knocking shop fantastic it's not funny

[Music] well he got us a job man see that's

Ricky's what Carly you know what's the

word day night good so what then how's it going

all right

[Applause] Saviour of timber just to those that

right might be

go Colin da wooly they say hey hey hey

Charles Finley [ __ ] I'm afraid not son see we've got all our

gear mister the three of us like thanks do the same for you sometime

Spurs Peterman

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this is like a spy book I once read you know love spy books me anyway this bloke

was trying to get through the German border on a false passport is he his pulse wrist and his mouth went dry

as a god scrutinized his pillow he's an avid reader in ours yeah that's part the

reason I left to him I would that many zombie tickets [Music]

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certainly love the six pit that's you could be plenty time before Dennis picks you up I'll get dressed through he Elif

says not to wait Europe who are Guerra well maybe throw some some sandwiches oh don't bother pet will be stubborn places

I won't sleep anyway oh come on Brenda no night stay around at my mom's the

first few days just like IRA just it oh we have told you to stop with your mom's I'll get your sister around some mates

when you feelin nervous about well murderers there aren't any murderous pet

not round here there's everything else I went the shops the other ding and what I

didn't want to see anything well he might as well know but didn't want to worry you

well you've got us worried sick sore what well how when tureen used to get me

hair done was the night we went to Don T's with John Margaret uh-huh listen man father does all the way home

he had to squint and he wore a Mac and he was starin adders wife if you had a

squint told you know you was staring at you I knew you wouldn't take it seriously never man just because a man

stares at you in wears a Mac it doesn't mean to say he's gonna m*rder your friend maybe but this isn't the safest place for a woman to live I know it

isn't that's why I'm going to Germany man hey

that's why I'm gone isn't it just I can get some cash and base a nice hopes on

an ASA steer it I don't want to go to Germany you know all that you do don't you

I'll miss you miss you yeah we're right

turn it over never give it up try

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bottom of the sump dropped off the soap man that is all Renault engine was

deceased and be fixed the new engine

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[Applause]

before you get this fixed to the German gut it's really insurance cover it I doubt it very much it's not insured has

to be insured man otherwise you couldn't have got the green car to get the car all of England no I constantly insurance

when I got the green car that give us a bit spend the money for when I got here you see you were gonna drive all the way to Germany load insurance whatever had a

crush hey what if we ended up in the chairman hospital when L in the German National Health you know huh well we

didn't did we what Coolidge on one of the engine it seized on the fastly in there well they're big juggernaut so far asks another bid on the first real lien

my son you shouldn't left no you would again you're totally irresponsible you

was it has to be said

[Music] that's it now

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Grunwald yeah yeah reporting for work sir Patterson I was

born in who and who fish that's a nice on to brickies at Jimmy Oh unless you

want into a bricky why yeah well we're no one if you do nine

it is not good I think to arrive so late Saudi silver well had a bit of bother on

the roots yeah look can we just check in the hostel and we'll get back yes Moorish yeah the hostel is full you will have to stay on

the compound will have thought would be in the hostel first serve first come put

your things in your Hut hot watch each other with what toe jam my toe jam okay

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whoo 17 the hustle with table tennis and [ __ ] I well what would have been wouldn't work would be don't aim

whenever all would start like 70 miles other things

this anyway the quarantine I dunno net well you've seen as much of this places aha I mean you've been here before

not to this site Nevel I can't choose the site I'm a bricklayer I'm gonna put

your eject hi excuse me to speak English it is my

mother tongue major so we can all male 8 my name is b*mber which is the best hood

all I take that the other ones got all the turns in it we call it the casbah

it's alright [Music]

playtime - eww - stare at your bed there

it'll only be temporary this you know yeah I'm still a hundred and eight I'll square it with your scam of a shock

the problem is gonna be the dogs do and damn well gonna put the sound

shut up boss and we're gonna need false pure as in civvy claws and with it well

it's a god isn't it you know what I mean no slouch smash no

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all mail will be censored so be careful what you're writing just want to tell whoever writes a fee what holds check

already aren't you no of course you wouldn't be no you feel matter who you

feel but you're thinking what it will be like if you order - all right now you'd be coming in from some freezing cold

windswept sate get another warmth of a nice cool fan that could aloft Brenda

the smell of the best dog really just waft me know what a kitchen sit on

should see put your feet up petting cutty on the nationwide now put a veggie on be magic well what's this thoughts

from your mind Escape is impossible for you Tommy the w*r is over

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- lights come from India I do you live here are in düsseldorf

there's a lot yeah I'm good it's a Conybeare so much bit there it's not as

good as we're wasteful from now if I stay about half big moon better than Kendall divided and a flower there's an

England so much for me attempt to cement anglo-german relations look for them

Dennis from one brick it say that we've got a wire van - I know that's where

they get the needle cuz and there was Foster's husband ironic really in our isn't it who's here helping erect

Dawlish well it was our look what flooded in the first place got this bit man near this is one of your Dhamma tree

suburbs all right like a computer boat sorta think III give enough Turkish oh

well you were getting one dog are you Donna KS cured

[Applause]

[Applause] Tomas sorry don't panic right cuz you

know what they say don't ya one man ceiling it's another man's floor

completely faultless but we're covering for you wait look if that foam engage

that comes around ok just saw something

[Music] hey oh no one will get my Red Cross

parcels that chocolate and condensed milk you live in a dream world you'll do

one for well it's a lot better than the real thing it

hey London oh man there's Neve Jew Frodo

I you could have split my bloody head open you lunatic I know I wanted to know where never lose

bud please I have a first aid in and I'm bloody lucky I'm not there with him

Jesus hey he'll be all right good

what cement source lift so many question

what are Lewis first this job will be rate hard oh well I'm afraid you've

written your last push God should leave you said hey that's yeah don't Harlan all isn't it serious injury you know he

kind of took my darling don't be of the world Domino showed off manners to be popular with the Germans anyway

they'd still be able to keep up with your work yes just threw a tantrum are

not to show crushing everything's a joke news NATO's just a permanent clown you

are alright well shouldn't butter a clone a pretty mushy like you really death well I'm not your woman I'm not

here cos on leg adores someone listen like me and Dennis we're only going

through with this cuz we've got a purpose although you just had a wave I didn't realize you had a purpose well you feed on advice you never know when

to leave the Lord Dean you're the one that saw a step ours whose are they what's the comical about mere enemy wife

what's the stranger boat is caring for her worrying iboga dennis is the same with his missus we're

just doing this for her on you 10 and the beds

Kevin mega Angela have a go with yours [Music]

if you go about your mom so they're gonna get to school I'll manage boys

better cause even yes he has but we're not gonna live together yet hasn't got

to that stage I still think they'll be happy in their own house not the way

it's been with us the wouldn't they

understand the arguments no it was different when they were toddlers now it's getting harder to answer their

questions well I would have thought where's dad's a pretty difficult question answer no I've had plenty of

practice with that one [Music]

hey cornea that makes it all worth Whaler first be a pocket and Bombers last watch you are leaving

I'm not soon enough me old duck kind nice job lined up by her Bristol new vapor good money home every night an

English ale yeah I need a Brittany I'll steam in there Monday all right

[Music]

berry shake I'll get Denise

all day oh yeah I believe all that the pleasure son Oh buddy buddy Tyler thought your jerk on

mönchengladbach that's it no he won't beat did I didn't like the place notice

soit's this looks alright that it's good

sort of better air and he's made electricians did I cap I was India

I don't chose me over you then I'll do that every day

you would marry my Tahu lab yeah so

needs of my travels these are new youngsters so much badges on your rucksacks b*mber he buries him on his

body never seen so many although these is nothing why me plug it

from team if they got all Fox undone is that the entire pack about one running down this fight yes just to the Fox

approach now he's not Oh show us is hot

look foot tell me get back here you've lost all the permits Oh dear me look a

London you must be looking below in some weird places yeah there's one blue

come on never Oh tell me you're getting your gear on it I'm not going thanks go on might do you

good get yourself old yourself I hope all my stupid only brother man look oh no a

brothel thanks very much yeah Esme punic you know it's all aboveboard steered India stared aunt yes a the girls are

saw a civil servants it's kind of like the national wealth look you don't have

to go with the brothel just come have a few jars with a larger I'm a bit tired

Anna I just as soon stop and have a bit read almost ready on Rose away

why b*mber would stoppable is important in the right

[Music] dearest Brenda it is Friday night and

the lads have just gone out they asked me to join them but without you I didn't

see much point

oh I prefer to stay in this hell yeah excite your mother after all this were

here and each I'll send all mine in the wife oh um I'm not married myself so

much the man goes back to me building society accounts this Westbourne is in

district yeah you know it's also that little nest egg justifies walk living in

this squalor that it it's pourcel it's a desperate place this

isn't it oh yeah mistake

I don't think arousing and woman eyes you know I like the rest of the heads no

no see the country he might as well broaden your horizons while you're out here man yeah you know I've already

managed to do a bit of sightseeing myself painter brush oh yeah it's a really beautiful prices

bros yeah I took some Polaroids in

Bruges oh I think I think you'll agree

it's a that they capture its historic splendor

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[Applause] spicy but enough one spot power if you insist [Music]

just [Music]

I've got a pretty good idea and we may know what its gonna be late well go and everything will be late red

bull [ __ ] on would fit in place Red Bull make the tabletops your nuts are living and there'll be a little fella in the

corner play the piano leases he seems ruler and all the birds will be you know

heavily metal and then from there must be course it's all of them stop in two

lanes of the market soon

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so this was the best problem in Germany no I didn't I said it was the biggest

hey Dennis says yeah you tell her hey hey it's not alone in your country the

FA note it up fancy that one Dennis it's

100 there Suzie Wong although you I've

gone off the idea in shared Chuck see

bug me well hope you've got a full pocket a good time oh hey where's magic

magic wait I didn't b*mber did I give it and missed me

where is b*mber oh he's still a hunk he's bought a season-ticket bummer Oh was fantastic I had this gorgeous

thought I mean admit it Dennis wasn't you're gorgeous ah bollocks mad she was there your

region never you know somewhere like that I mean let's face it you're doing a

chance were birds there you gotten buck who owned a I mean was it like different was it poor tell you one thing me at sex

is in a 10 min see and get it [Music]

- oh I thought you were going wrong at

airport should you be in the station mine over you should be yes better get

your skates on hon you not go now no point what no money I didn't you said you had

nearly 900 pound to take home well I had it no I haven't how many

girls did you have I went out after with some of the Brits poker was my downfall

I was feeling lucky hey Ratner William

stabs effective Bobby's judgment oh that's tragic wouldn't he tell the wife

or he knows exactly what you'll say that's way bombers staying not the first

time by daft is brush that's what would be in bombers problem I didn't know who

goes to work every week hands it over to the wife pays for the house new clothes

for the kids don't need much for yourself like suddenly who gets a great

wire to spend the money in your fists throws you off kilter it's a great feeling me I wanna buy drink if your

friends even strangers so what are you gonna do now

as much over time as I can crack its are straightened out of normal

[Music]

Hey did you say is awesome my thoughts

on what's lungs up Snoodle ah that's

what Suzy who's Sinan easier than A*DS [Music]

[Music]

heyno couple trust me you're chuckling in well is it true yeah

no choice hover b*mb had gone out of

stock but I'm no chip Eamon Dennis I can't go on figuring it well I tell you

what I'll have a word look in I'll explain the circumstances I'll see that you're dead keen to steal and then oh

just walk your button the bricks it's too late for that no 10 see I just rung

the missus and told her I'm comin what was it literally no I wasn't here she's putting more pressure on at all

it's me mum Dennis I hid it here on me see

Dobby I could make it those in pound Bush it would take us six months might kind of stand the prospect of that

yeah it's partly my fault I suppose ya know get in to lose your picture no it's not that either

see it's just I know me and I know I wouldn't last a distance well when do

you leave so that work out this week great listen Friday night okay you're

coming out with a large rate I mean you haven't come all this way to spent two weeks in a wood reading others who

overdue library books do so soon are no arguments at settled all right good luck

that's a nice looking birds they the coats I've got a k*ller Mouse [Music]

[Applause] yeah sure that forget this take the more

you'll be but we all Brenda bucks Julie you better get in there quick

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you may be watching it it's quite simple reading what I did fifty quid in last

week just like that month what do you home with your we're just attacked me vandals colors on the food

female birra [Music]

sorry oh gee I'm a h* jaaye right well

you look here money not this miserable a*s in a way we're just talking about

the mean in the Lifehouse oh I thought yeah I'll give that a lot of thought leak or being a bricklayer I mean it

makes you a bit of a philosopher you ever had any ambition or ambition his

only ambition is to say Friday is come round again but don't you pay no mind

only wanna tell you [Music]

Oh

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make sure you do rate and start eight

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watch us vehicle wash that's never what

where's Neville well he's not in here with me well did he not come back with

you last night no yeah he went to Obama and some of the

lads I forget whoa I know I should've left it with you Oh didn't fret money being wet loss in him

since we're left is yours nor mine Oh bollocks so much insurance life you know double

bollocks well where do we go

British on the bench was it but you didn't have your stuff with you could have just tops to it on the kid they

worse bummer I don't know I think he went with an prefer well you didn't like certainly not well I didn't get your

gear together no I'll get you stood on this dear soon huh what I'm not going let me guess why

you've lost all your money haven't ya you've blown it all on booze and Carmen are you just like boomer haven't ya know

how I ended up on they've known astonished German money gonna win did

you win you're rich bonny lad come on well comfortably well up anyway yeah

we'll chart over 7 or 7 with this working I'm warmer East II can't Goulbourne ever why not look sure you

didn't stick it out but you're going home with a wad full of money got nothing to be ashamed of Ozzie no I'm

not oh go home with this whose bloody

I can't remember [Music]

to tell us

oops that's living on [Music]

just to keep you in bats

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the Danes but you know names [Music]