02x11 - Alive N' Chicken/Prima Doggy

[bunniefuu]

-[theme music playing]
-[barking]

[engine revs]

♪ I'm seeing lots of spots ♪

♪ Plenty of polka dots ♪

[barking]

♪ Get those puppies! ♪

♪ Can't catch a furry flurry ♪

♪ Running in a blurry hurry ♪

[barking]

♪ Get those puppies! ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Canines on the run ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Them doggone dogs are fun ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Without fail you'll wind up
chasing your tail ♪

♪ What's the harm
in revelrous adventures ♪

-♪ On the funny farm? ♪
-[clucks]

-♪ 1-0-1 ♪
-[barks]

-♪ Life's just a bed of roses ♪
-♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Fast friends with cold, wet noses ♪

-♪ 1-0-1 ♪
-♪ Through thick, thin, push and pull ♪

♪ It's 1-0-1 oh wonderful! ♪

♪ Just tons of fun ♪

♪ 101 Dalmatians! ♪

[Scatting to tune
of "Turkey in the Straw"]

Whoa! Corn!

♪ Corn, corn, corn ♪

[Nanny] Oh, that spot!

Me? What'd I do?

[Anita] Spot? Oh, no!

Wh-What?!

I'm afraid it's curtains
for that one, Anita.

[gasp] Curtains?! Aaaah!

Isn't there anything we can do?

Oh, I wish there were.

Well, by tonight,
that spot'll be history.

Tonight? B-b-but... Aaaaaaah!

You're actually
going to make curtains

out of a dress
with a spot on it?

Uh-huh. Last week,
I made Roger a shirt

out of old dish towels,
and he loves it.

[sobbing] Why me?

I'm not ready to go to that
big chicken coop in the sky.

[bang!]

Ha ha! Perfect.

Oh, and it's just my size!

[sighs] Ugggh!

[humming]

[panting]

[grunting]

There. That should be deep enough.

Yeah, to put me six feet under!

Yaaaaa!

Dish towel shirt? Ugggh!

Yaaaah!

[puppies] Whoa!

Huh? Huh? What?

Whoa, Spot, is the sky falling again?

Worse. I only have one day to live.

Cut! Rewind.
Take it from the beginning.

Well, it all started this morning...

[ticking]

Oh, Spot!

[sobbing]

Oh, why is it always the good one?

[sinister chuckle]

[creepy organ music plays]

[thunder]

[maniacal laughter]

[thunder]

And so, by tonight, I'll be going
to that final nesting place.

-Spot...
-The big round-up.

-Spot...
-The great beyond.

-Spot...
-The sweet sayonara.

Spot! We don't want
to negate any emotions

you're wallowing in right now,
but your egg is cracked.

Spot, Anita was probably just talking
about a spot on her dress.

[yawn]

And he was probably building
a planter box for her herb garden.

And I'll bet Roger was burying

that ugly shirt Anita made
out of dish towels.

Oh, yeah, right.

And I'm Walnutta,
Queen of the Cashew People!

Long live the nut queen!

Uggh! Fine.

If my best friends
don't even believe me,

then I'll just go spend
my last day alone,

all by myself, sitting in the dark!

-Okay.
-See ya.

Excuse me.

Are you just gonna let Spot go on
believing there's no tomorrow?

-Yeah.
-I guess so.

Then this is a perfect chance
for Spot to experience

emotional and spiritual growth

unencumbered by the anguish
of mental anxiety.

For what?

For Spot to quit being such a worrywart
and live it up for once!

[both] Ohh!

[Spot] I've gotta what?

You've gotta live it up.

If you say there's no tomorrow,

fine... then you're going to have to
live like there's no tomorrow.

Arrrgh!

We'll start with a massage.

[Spot] Ugggggh! Whaaaaa!

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ah, relaxin', huh?

[bell dings]

Aaaah!

Ohhh!

Come on, Spot, live it up!
You're eating like a bird!

Rolly, I am a bird.

A bird with serious
digestive problems.

But, Spot, if today
is your last day,

you can eat like
there's no tomorrow.

You're right!

For once, I can eat whatever I want.

It doesn't matter. I can pig out!

[Spot gobbling]

[thud!]

Did you feel that?

[thud!]

[branches breaking]

[thud!]

Hey, I'm starting to like
living it up.

What are we gonna do next?

You're gonna face your fears
and finally stand up to someone

who's not only hurt your pride

but devalued you as an individual.

Don't do this for me, Spot,
do it for you.

[snarling]

Steven, I just wanted to tell you,

I kind of don't like
the way you always...

try to eat me!

Come on, Spot.
If today's your last day,

you have to stand up to Steven
like there's no tomorrow,

which, for you, there isn't.

Hey, you're right.
I've got nothin' to lose.

Ugggh!

[snarling]

You know, I really hate it
when you try to eat me,

because it really hurts!

And then I gotta pick your teeth
outta my skin.

And you know what else?
You have bad breath.

P-U!

I mean, really bad breath!

Wow! I did it.

I stood up to Steven, and I feel great!

I feel great! I feel...

Get... Me... out!

Get ready, Spot, 'cause now
you're really gonna live it up.

[Spot] Ehh! I am?

Yep. You're gonna fly.

Lucky, I am a chicken.
I can already fly.

But you've never soared.

Fly, Spot, fly!

[crash!]

Fly, Spot, fly!

[crash!]

Fly, Spot, fly!

I said, fly, Spot, fly!

Lucky, I appreciate what you're
trying to do for me, but...

But what?

Come on, Spot, if today
is your last day...

I've gotta fly like
there's no tomorrow.

Live it up, Spot! Live it up!

Oh, look out!

[Spot] Yaha! Whoo-hoo-hoo!

Aaaaah!

Arrggh!

[crowd cheering]

[blows whistle]

[humming]

Whoa!

[gasp] I love it!

Ya-a-a-a-a-a!

Ahh... rock-and-roll.

[gasp] Ohhh!

[Anita] Well, by tonight,
that Spot will be history.

Mayday, Mayday!

[Spot] This must be it. Chicken heaven!

[sigh]

[Spot] Oh, look, I can still see Lucky

and Rolly and good old Cadpig!

It's almost as if I'm still alive.

-You are still alive!
-Huh?

[Anita] Nanny, come here.

Look at my dress now.

My goodness, it really was
curtains for that one.

And that spot is history.

You see? They were talking about
a spot on a dress, not you!

You're gonna live, birdie!

Oh! You mean I had
all that fun for nothin'?

Not for nothing, Spot.

Why, now you know how you should
live your life every day,

with gusto, passion, and courage.

Yaha! I'm gonna live!

♪ I'm gonna live, I'm gonna li... ♪

Yaaaah! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die!

I'm gonna die!

[Steven chomping]

[puppies yipping]

Red Air Dale rules!

Yellow's my favorite.

I like the brown one.
It looks like gravy.

[dog barks on TV]
"Air Dales," brought to you by

Kanine Krunchies!

You've loved them for years.
Now they're even better.

Introducing new
Kanine Krunchies Max!

Max flavor. Max nutrition.
Max energy!

Max hunger.

Are you a dog who wants
to be a star?

[bell dings]

We're coming to Topstown

to find the new Max dog
for Kanine Krunchies.

Audition tomorrow right here
at our station.

It could be you!

Hey, it could be me.

Yes! You are a dog of destiny.

Or me. I eat more
Kanine Krunchies than anybody.

I'm a professional.

-Or me!
-You?!!

They can do anything with
special effects these days.

[Lucky] Looks like
we got here first. Uh-oh.

[bagpipe squeals]

Competition's tougher
than I thought.

Let's not pooh-pooh our positivity.

Don't think about the competition.
They don't even exist.

Yes, they do.

And they've got skate boards,
swimming pools,

and stilts and stuff!

How can we compete with that?

There's nobody just like you.

You're the only you here.

Tell him that!

Hmm. Can you do
someone else?

No, but I got a great
disappearing act. See ya.

I'm sticking with what I know.

I'd like to see just one of those dogs
juggle their own eggs.

What was I thinking?
I don't have a chance.

Ha! There is no such thing
as chance, Lucky.

It's all up to destiny.

And today my name is Destiny!

[gasp]

Look at all this stuff.

There's gotta be something I can use.
[gasp]

An Air Dale costume!

Yeah!

Oh, the old
"catch the rubber disk" act.

Terrific!

I must have seen it a million times,
but it's sweet!

[sighs]

Happy little elves, right?

-No. Marx Brothers.
-Who?

Oh, now I see it!

I'm sure the director will
catch on faster than I did.

Oh, I love synchronized swimming.

I just don't know why
so many people hate it.

Maybe it's the funny hats.

[playing simple melody]

Beautiful, thank you.
We'll be in touch.

[piano clangs]

This is not what I want!

Cecil B. De Vil wants a dog
that acts like a dog.

I want a dog that rolls over

and sticks his nose
where it does not belong.

I need to film a piece as artistic

as my tushy-kushy toilet-paper
extravaganza!

Your salute to two-ply
was a moving experience, sir.

Yes. Yes, it was. Next!

Next dog, please.

Lucky, wait!
What are you doing?

Getting noticed.

I'm gonna make an entrance
they'll never forget.

But the director wants
a natural dog.

You know, fetching,
licking, marking territory.

He does?
Get me outta this thing!

-Is this the zipper?
-No.

It's the "on" switch!

[ruff ruff ruff]

Now, this is more like it!

He has personality. He's perky.

He has that canine charisma
I'm looking for.

Auditions are over.
I've found my spokespup.

[squawk!]

Ah, back to my humble roots.

Seems like only yesterday,
I was here.

Actually, it was this morning.

Well, time flies
when you're a sh**ting star.

Three cheers for Lucky!

[animals cheering]

-Can I have your paw print?
-Me, too.

Luck, don't forget me.

Sure, I always have time for my fans.

[Lucky] How about you, Mooch?
Want my paw print?

No. But you can have mine.

Ha ha ha!

That was funny!

Ignore the critics.

-[bell chiming]
-All right, dinnertime!

[barking]

Uh-uh. Lucky, where are you going?

A star never follows the crowd.

Whoops, I forgot.

-Dig in, Lucky.
-Eat from a trough?

This isn't a cattle call.

Very star-like.

Hey, Lucky, can we watch you
make a commercial tomorrow?

Yeah. It'll be fun to see you work.

Well, I don't know.
It's a closed set.

-They could be your entourage.
-What's that?

You know, your groupies,
your crew, your posse.

They adore you wherever you go.

Hey, sure, you can't
have too many of those.

[Cadpig, sighing] Oh, this is
just the beginning, Lucky.

[Lucky] You got that right.

Sitcoms, movie deals.

My own toy line.

Okay, people,
get the mutt on his mark.

I want this commercial
to be as magical

as my rosy-toesies piece.

You raised foot odor
to an art form in that one, sir.

I know, and I'll do
the same for dog food.

I'm going to show
how far a dog will go

to get Kanine Krunchies.

No matter how many takes it takes.

That's what he thinks.

Watch me get it right
on the first take.

Take 1.

And action!

[dramatic soundtrack plays]

Ahhh!

Cut!

No, no, no, no,
that was all wrong.

It's shallow, it's vacuous,
it's... well, it's...

It's not big enough!

Take 2.

[hiss]

[snarl]

Cut!

[assistant] Take 3.

Bigger!

Ugh! I can't take
any more takes.

I'm stuffed.

You just need to focus.

Be the hunger.

Oh, papa, I'm the hunger!

-Could I be your stand-in?
-Oh, please.

A stand-in has to look like the star.

Are you calling me fat?

Well, yeah.

Stars get to say anything they want.

Yeah, well, go find
yourself another fan.

Boy, your friends really change
when you become a star.

[panting]

I thought stars had fun.

This is just a bunch of hard work.

Need a stunt chicken?

No way. I do my own stunts.

Get your own dog food commercial.

[sighs] Maybe I will!

[director] Ready on the set!

[assistant] Take 4.

[director] Cut!

[assistant] Take 40.

Take 400.

[gulp] Ewwww!

-[director] Cut!
-[buzzer sounds]

Finally get the big take I want,
and you ruin it!

Why does this always
happen to me?

Where am I supposed to find
a new Max dog now?!

[Spot] Ahem! Bawk!

[director] Ewww!
Who let this chicken on the...

Oh, wait. Oh, wait, that's it.

Listen to me, people,
I have found my new Max dog.

This chicken!

Now, that's big!

Okay, let's get this chicken
into makeup

and on his mark, let's go!

Looks like I'm not very good
at being a star.

You know, Lucky,
I think what we've learned here

is that everyone should be treated
like a star.

Per turn. Spot!

Oh, I ask, what better animal
to advertise

new chicken-flavored
Kanine Krunchies than...

a chicken?!

[squawk]
Chicken flavored!

[ptooey!]

What do they take me for,
some kind of sicko?!

Wait, Spot! Read this.

"Artificial chicken flavor."

Hooray for chemical additives!

Makeup!

It sure is good
to have the old Lucky back.

Thanks. Sorry for the way I acted.

I let being a star go to my head.

I just hope it doesn't go to hers.

Introducing new
Kanine Krunchies Max

with chicken flavor.

It's artificial!

[squawk squawk]

[theme music plays]