02x18 - Close But No Cigar/Invasion of the Doggy Snatchers

[bunniefuu]

[theme music playing]

[barking]

[engine revs]

♪ I'm seeing lots of spots ♪

♪ Plenty of polka dots ♪

[barking]

♪ Get those puppies! ♪

♪ Can't catch a furry flurry ♪

♪ Running in a blurry hurry ♪

[barking]

♪ Get those puppies! ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Canines on the run ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Them doggone dogs are fun ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Without fail
You'll wind up chasing your tail ♪

♪ What's the harm in revelrous adventures
On the funny farm? ♪

-♪ 1-0-1 ♪
-[barks]

-♪ Life's just a bed of roses ♪
-♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Fast friends with cold, wet noses ♪

-♪ 1-0-1 ♪
-♪ Through thick, thin, push and pull ♪

♪ It's 1-0-1, oh, wonderful ♪

♪ Just tons of fun ♪

♪ 101 Dalmatians! ♪

[man on TV]
♪ For barrels of fun, be sure to run ♪

♪ To the Grutely County Fair ♪

♪ Ferris wheels, bumper cars ♪

♪ And guest stars will be there
Yoo hoo! ♪

And be sure to buy
your ticket for the 10,000...

Uh, I've only got eight fingers.

The $10,000 House of de Vil sweepstakes!

That's right, Ed.

Today some lucky little peon
will walk away

with more money than they deserve.

Plus a year's supply
of my new silky soft hairspray,

Cruella Sheen!

-Oh!
-Ed?

Plus don't miss
the fair's special guest star,

Thunderbolt the Wonder Dog!

[all] Whoa!

Oh, man! I can't wait
to meet Thunderbolt.

I hear he dyes his muzzle.

[sighs] Is Nanny ready to go yet?

I don't want to miss
the pie-eating contest.

[grunts] I've been practicing all week.

Personally, I'm drawn
to the symbolic journey

of the roller coaster,

carrying you through life's ups and downs

till you puke.

Ha! You won't catch me anywhere near
those dolled-up death traps.

Do you know how many people are maimed
every year on merry-go-rounds? Ah!

-Uh, none?
-Exactly!

A tragedy is long overdue.

Hmm. More to the left.

More to the left! More to the left.

More to the left! More to the left.

No, that's not right.

Good news, Miss de Vil.

I sold every last sweepstakes ticket.

Excellent, little man!

Let me say, I think
you're doing a fine, upstanding thing

by giving away all that money
to some lucky winner.

[laughs]

Listen, darling,

the lucky winner of the grand prize
shall be, by remarkable coincidence, me!

-You, ma'am?
-Exactly.

[whirring]

[Cruella] With my lucky ticket number 202.

You did remember not to sell
ticket number 202, didn't you?

Well...

[laughs]

Oh, my lucky number. 202!

What?

You sold my winning ticket
to that doggy den mother?

Get it back! You understand?

Now!

Come on, guys. The bus is leaving.

Just a sec. This is the best part.

Where Thunderbolt parachutes
behind enemy lines,

disguised as a Pekingese.


Wait, wait.
Didn't you already go... aw!

Uh, 41, 42...

[sighs]

[humming]

Mwah!

Well, I guess that's everybody.

[all] Yay!

Hey, come on, guys.
We don't want to miss the bus.

We missed the b-b-bus.

Aw, man!

No pie.

No thrill rides.

No Thunderbolt.

Hey! Nanny dropped
her sweepstakes ticket.

That settles it.

We'll just have to go to the fair
and take it to her.

I hate this idea already.

Now according to my calculations,

the only truly statistically
safe ride is...

the turnstile.

Aw, Lucky, are we there yet?

I'm getting awful hungry.

I don't recognize any of this.

Hey, trust me. The fair is right down...

[Lucky] Or, uh...

Maybe that one? Or that one?

Ah! We're lost! I knew it!

Doomed, doomed!

Oh, just one more chicken
on a milk carton.

Hey, Jasper, ain't that
some of them cute little puppies?

Forget the pups.

We got to find that ticket.

Hiya, puppies.

[Horace] Nice ticket.

[brakes squeal]

Hello, doggies.

How's about a lift?

Now why don't you just hand
that little ticket over

to old Uncle Jasper here? Huh?

-[crunching]
-Yeeaaah!

-[groaning]
-[screaming]

-[all yipping]
-Hey!

Uh!

[ice smashing]

[Spot] O-o-oh, I think I f-f-froze
my gib-gib-giblets.

Hey, ch-ch-chill out.

I just kn-know we're getting
c-c-closer to the fair.

Now c-c-come on.

[sighs]

Oh, we're never going
to get to the fair.

Um, Lucky, where's Rolly?

Ooh, pie!

Oh, no!

-[brakes squeal]
-Here they are.

[laughs] Yippee!

[Lucky] Rolly!

[crashing]

The ticket!

[all] Yikes!

[men grunting, hooting]

[all sigh]

[flushing sound]

[rumbling, gurgling]

[all] Ahhh!

[Spot] Just like a roller coaster!

[all] Yay! Whoo! Ha!

[groans]

[men shouting]

[all] Ahh!

[all giggling]

[all] Whoo! Ha!

Hey! Stop eating my pie!

-[laughs] Thanks!
-Hey!

[splash]

[both] Yah!

[men screaming]

[men scream]

[Spot] Ah! Just like a Ferris wheel!

[all screaming]

[bleating]

[bleating]

[all shouting]

Folks, the big moment has come.

Here to draw the winning ticket
for $10,000

and a year's supply
of Cruella Sheen hairspray,

our special guest, Thunderbolt P.I.!

Where are those bumpkins?

-[bleating]
-Sorry, ma'am, no brakes!

[crashing]

And the winner is...

[man] Goat stampede!

[crash]

[both gasp]

Number 202.

Oh! That's me! That's me!

I won! Oh!

[applauses]

[grunts] Thu-Thunderbolt?

[Rolly] Well, at least Lucky
got to meet Thunderbolt.

Even if we did miss the fair.

Miss the fair?

Miss the fair!

Why, we spent the whole day
at that big shiny fair called life!

The roller-coaster ride
in the pie factory.

All the pies I could eat! [belches]

The bumper buckets
and the Ferris water wheel.

And I didn't even get hurt.

[moans]

[man on TV] Correct me if I'm wrong,
but ever since that thing landed,

strange, inexplicable events
have occurred.

events which cannot be explained
in normal, scientific terms.

Something has happened
here in Happy Town...

something evil.

[spits]

Evil? Gah!

Hey! Will you chill out?

-I'm chilled, I'm chilled.
-Shh!

[man on TV] Call me crazy,
but I'm beginning to suspect

the good people of this town
have changed.

- Ahh!
-[spits]

Ooh! Oh, no!

They're living in Freaky Town!

I wonder, can we remain calm?

Hey, who's not calm?

We've got to get out of here, Sheila,

before we become
slime-sucking space aliens.

-[growls]
-Ahh!

Ah!

-[dogs sighing]
-[Cadpig] She did it again.

I'll get the crowbar.

[chicken] You, high-strung?

I've never heard anything so preposterous.

B-b-but that's what the pups all say.

You're calmer and cooler
than any chicken in this coop.

-[car backfiring]
-Ahhh!

Okay, so maybe you're not.

But you're an excellent dancer
and that's got to count for something.

[growling]

[moans] I guess they're right about me.

Look, Spot, don't worry
about what the other species say,

even the pups.

One day, you're their best friend
and the next day, you're their entrée.

Pleasant dreams. [snoring]

Nah. Not my friends.

[chickens all snoring]

Ah...

[rooster crowing]

[sighs]

Lucky's right.
I do get hysterical over nothing.

From now on, I'm going to relax,

kick back,
take time to smell the earthworms.

[sniffing]

Huh?

[laughs]

Hey, guys, it's me!

[grunting]

Uh... That's funny.
I've never been locked out before.

Oh, hi.

Hiya, Cadpig. Wanna go swimming?

Um, ooh, no can do.

Hey! Hmm.

Lucky! How about you?

Uh, I got plans.

Uh, Rolly, feel like a meal?

Sorry. Not hungry.

Huh?

Rolly not hungry? Impossible!

Weird, huh?

Actually, they're all acting
a little strange.

Strange is not good.

Aw, they're probably still peeved

'cause of the holes
I put in their ceiling.

I'm sure they'll be all right
in a day or two.

Maybe. Maybe not.

Who are you?

Sal is the name.

And it's time you woke up
and smelled the kibble.

[all squealing]


in Farmer Fredley's north 40.

A Golden Retriever refuses to fetch.

Hours later, three pullets disappear.

Coincidence? Ha ha. I think not!

in northern Minnesota.

Soon afterwards,
a Mexican Hairless grows a beard.

Two weeks later,
four hens spontaneously combust.

Accident? You be the judge.

flies through frame.

Dalmatians snub local chicken.

A strange slide projector
appears from nowhere.

Isolated incidents,
or part of a larger pattern?

[all muttering]

Aw, cut it out! This is silly.

Let your paranoid friend finish, dear.

There is only one logical answer.

The reason your puppy pals
scoff at space monsters

is because they have become
space monsters themselves!

[all gasping]

I have never heard
anything so ridiculous in all my life!

Oh, yeah?

Then how do you explain that?

[all gasping]

Yep, that was definitely made
by a UFO-ish type space-traveling vehicle.

Now how do you know that?

'Cause I'm an expert!

I want a second opinion.

Okay, you got it. [whistles]

[snorting]

[gasps]

[screaming]

You'll have to excuse Steven.
He's been abducted.

[Sal] And it might happen to us.

That's why we must find out

if the Dalmatians
have been turned into aliens.

Hey, I got just the thing!

This is a comprehensive manual
detailing the characteristics

of the slime-sucking little critters.

That'll be $39.95, plus tax.

We'll take it.

Why don't we just ask them?

Because it says here
that aliens are notorious liars.

"Question one:

Are the subjects engaged
in super-secret activities?"

[whispering]

-[grunting]
-Uh-oh.

"Question two:

Do the subjects speak
in a weird alien-type pitch?"

-[squeaking] Is it ready?
-[squeaking] We're nearly done.

Maybe it's laryngitis.

"Question three:

Can the subjects defy
the earth's gravity?"

[gasps] Sweet Georgia Brown!

It's a full-scale invasion!

First the bad news.

As I suspected, the dogs
have indeed been turned into aliens.

[all muttering, squealing]

And now the good news.

I managed to find a ride
for every bird who wants out.

We'll be leaving in the morning.

-If you want to go, pack your things.
-[whimpers]

And above all, remain calm.

All right, ladies.

Don't just stand there. Panic!

[all screaming]

-Everybody stop!
-[brakes squeal]

What are we, nuts?

These are our friends.
They're not aliens.

And if they are aliens,
I want to hear it from them.

All right! What are you going to do?

Walk up to the barn
with a casserole and smile

and say, "Hi, are you guys aliens?"

Hi. Are you guys aliens?

[whimpers]

[door creaks]

Hello?

Anybody home?

Eh, it's me, your old pal, Spot.

-[door slamming]
-Ahh!

Uh, olly olly oxen free!

See? No aliens.

No space ship.

Just an ominously dark barn.

[gasps]

Spot!

[screams]

Ahh!

-[squealing] Spot?
-Ahhh!

[panting]

[squealing] Hey, Spot!

[screaming]

I'm warning you, I know karate!

[all squealing] Spot!

Okay, so maybe I don't know karate.

But I'm an excellent dancer.

And that's got to count for something.

-[all] Spot!
-[gulps]

You slime-sucking aliens
ate my friends!

And no one eats my pals,
not without dealing with me!

Ahhh!

-[crashing]
-[Spot] Ow.

Calm down, you maniac. It's us.

But...

you're-you're all green.

It's just paint.

For your surprise.

We made it so you wouldn't
have to walk home

after Mystery Creepizoid Theater.

B-b-but you were floating in the...

Spot, you gotta try this! [giggling]

-But you were talking all-all...
-Ahem.

Oh, so you guys weren't...
you mean, you're not...

You're... Oh, boy.

Man! She has got to learn to calm down.

You see?

There was absolutely
no reason to be paranoid.

From now on,
I think we should all just relax.

Words to live by.

Come on, gals! The seed's on me.

[all cheering]

Don't feel bad, dear.
It was a lovely panic.

[sighs]

[robotic voice]
Scout One to Mother Ship.

[male voice] Mother Ship here.

Are the chickens ready for transport?

Negative.
But I did get something much better.

[croaking] Not again.

[theme music playing]