01x02 - Gone Bonkers (2)

[bunniefuu]

♪ Once upon a time in Toontown ♪

♪ There was a cat that had it all ♪

♪ Fortune and fame top of the game ♪

♪ Up until he hit the wall ♪

♪ Now he makes a livin' downtown ♪

♪ Walkin' on a brand new beat ♪

♪ Slippin' through the new day
Trippin' on a two-way ♪

♪ Ticket down a one-way street
Beep beep beep ♪

♪ Who's that cat ♪

[siren]

♪ Crackin' up crime? ♪

♪ Stoppin' the clock ♪

[clock ticking]

♪ Hope he gets here on time ♪

[old car horn]

-♪ Let's go--
-Bonkers ♪

♪ Yeah! Totally nuts ♪

-♪ Bonkers
-No ifs, ands or but buts ♪

-♪ Bonkers
-Someone's stealin' the show ♪

♪ Can't stay I gotta go, go! Oh, no! ♪

-♪ Bonkers
-Things gettin' outta control ♪

♪ Now you're caught in a trap
Ready to snap ♪

♪ Snappin' the cap
And you're takin' the rap ♪

♪ But ya can't hold back
That wacky attack ♪

♪ That's why you're still a star ♪

-♪ 'Cause you're--
-Bonkers ♪

-♪ Bonkers
-Bonkers ♪

♪ Bonkers ♪

♪ Wherever you-- wherever you--
Wherever you-- ♪

♪ Wherever you are ♪

♪ Bonkers ♪

[tires screech]

[Mr. Doodles] Now where is that Bobcat?

If I don't get him this time,
the boss will not be--

Aha!

Gee, I love police work.

It's so exciting.

Once I've rememberized this police manual

and Lucky's shown me the ropes,
I'll be a real cop.

I love this cop stuff.

[whimpers]

[crash]

You think they could make
this manual in paperback. [scoffs]

May be Fall-Apart rabbit can help
me rememberize this manual.

This time, Bobcat, you're coming with me.

[buzz]

-[door bell rings]
-[horn blares]

Oh, well, maybe he has a cake
in the washer or something.

Gee, that's strange.

It's from anvil of the month club package.

And he hasn't even opened it yet.

[thud]

[groans]

Yoo-hoo!

Fall-apart, it's me,
Bonkers, your best buddy!

Fall-apart?

Fall-apart?

Fall-Apart?

♪ Fall-Apart ♪

He's--

he's-- strategic pause--

gone! [sobbing]

Snap out of it, Bobcat.

Remember, you're a cop now.

But he's missing.

Just like Bubba Bear.

What if they're toon-napped,
I'll never see them again.

Get ahold of yourself
and figure this thing out.

You can do it. All you need's a little--

help!

[snoring]

Lucky, wake up!

Calling Officer Piquel,
this is your partner speaking.

-What is it?
-Wake up!

You!

[yawn]

Who is it, Dear?

Uh, nothing.
Just an orange Bobcat with a bullhorn.

[yawning] That's nice.

What are you doing here?

Fall-Apart rabbit is missing!

Shh!

Fall-a-what? What did you say?

Fall-Apart rabbit!

You woke me up at 2:00 in the morning
to tell me somebody fell apart on a rab--

you don't need me, you need a doctor.

Shh.

No, Fall-Apart rabbit,
my best friend, my numero-uno toono loono,

he's gone, vamoosed.

There's no time to lose.
We have to start investigating now.

Okay, we'll look into it first
thing in the morning, all right?

But he and Bubba could be in big trouble--

what if they have been kidnapped
by spies or space aliens or--

we have to do something.

Please, please, please, please,
please, please, please, please!

Okay. But this time, no silly toon stuff.

Pay close attention to see how
a real cop looks for evidence.

Right-o, Sir. But aren't
you forgetting something?

Oh, yeah. [chuckles]

That's a little better.

Just remember, you're a real cop now,
and real cops follow procedures.

Procedures. Check. Gotcha.
Over and out. Roger Wilco. 10-4.

Right and running with you all the way.

Now the first thing, a real cop does

is to make sure none
of the evidence gets disturbed.

And take this tape
and cordon off the area.

Cordon off the area.

-Affirmative. Okey-smokey.
-[squelch]

Just do it.

I'm on it, Chief.

Crime scene duly cordoned off,
Officer Piquel!

What's our next move?

[muffled shouts]

Scissors.

Wait. What's this?
More of those sawdust footprints?

I'll just collect these
for further analysisisis.

Stop! What are you doing?
Put down the broom!

Good thinking, Chief!
This time I'll use a vacuum.

That's it! Stop! Hold it!
Don't do anything else!

Too bad because
that was our last scrap of evidence.

Now there's nothing left
but this postcard.

A postcard? What postcard?

Uh, just this postcard from Bubba bear

asking Fall-Apart to meet him
in Walla Walla, Washington.

For a vacation. That's all.

What?

[crash]

Bonkers, this postcard
explains everything.

Why didn't you mention this earlier?

As far as I'm concerned,
this case is solved.

Your missing toons aren't missing,
they are on vacation!

Fall-Apart would never leave these behind.

What are you talking about?

It's all very simple.

Someone planted that postcard
to throw us off the trail.

Stop! That's it. I've had it
with your wacky toon theories.

[gasping] I tried to help you,
but you're impossible.

You'll never make it as a cop,
and certainly not as my partner.

[sobbing] Well, if you think
I'm in the way...

I guess I could just... quit.

I'm sorry, kid, but I think that might
be better for both of us.

Okay.

Bye... partner.

[rumbling]

[thunder rumbling]

[Bonkers] Talk about your bad karma.

First I lose my job
at the Wacky Toon Studios

and then my new partner
doesn't want me anymore.

Mi-mi-mi-mi! Honk!

Toots! Boy, am I glad to see you.

Mi-mi-mi-mi!
Honk honk! Mi-mi-mi! Honk! Mi-mi-mi--

What? What do you mean everybody's gone?

[sighs] I guess Lucky Piquel was right.

Everybody went to Walla Walla after all.

I guess that's why he's
a police officer...

-and I'm not.
-[thunder rumbles]

Say, Toots, let's go on vacation, too.

Just you and me, pal.

[chuckling] A toon black hole.
Gets 'em every time.

We'll take the first train
to Walla Walla in the morning.

Or we could leave now,
if we take your car.

'Course it's a little small, I'll have
to pack my feet in the trunk but--

[thunder rumbles]

Toots?

Boy, lose a job in this town,
and nobody wants to be seen with you.

[screams]

-[splash]
-Yes!

[chuckling]

[thunder continues]

[continues chuckling]

[continues chuckling]

So, so, where is he?

Where is Bonkers, Mr. Doodles?

Right here.

[Bonkers screaming]

Hey! What gives?

Hey, are you guys some kind
of collection agency or something?

If it's about those overdue
library books, I can--

Hey, that's the set from
Trail Mix Bonkers.

[Toots] Mi-mi!

And that's from Bonkers in Space.

[Toots] Mi!

And I used these in Roller Rink Bonkers.
-Mi-mi!

Ah!

Beautiful!

[laughs evilly]

The Bobcat will finish
off my collection nicely.

You have some nice stuff here,
Mr... Mr... [mumbles]

You know, I didn't actually
catch that last name.

Actually, I didn't catch that actual
first name, either, actually.

My fellow toons call me the collector.

You see, not only am I a toon, but...

[laughs evilly]

I also collect them.

Allow me to show you
my most recent artistic masterpieces.

Yes.

Fall-Apart, Grumbles, Jitters?
What's going on?

Fawn and Bubba Bear?

I thought you guys were all
in Walla Walla,

not hanging on the wall-uh.

Hmm, something very
strange about all of this.

[groans]

Mr. Doodles.

What's going on here?

Well, let me explain.

Behold!

The Laminator!

I created it to laminate toons,
like Bubba Bear here,

and preserve them alive...

but... [chuckles]

But immobile...

[chuckling]

forever!

Yeah. [laughs nervously]
would you look at the time?

Well, got to go, Mr. Weirdo
cartoon collector. Ciao.

And if you don't mind,
I'll take my friends with me.

Au contraire, Bonkers.

You can't leave.

Why, you're the one who'll
finish off my collection.

Mr. Doodles, I think it is time
we pencil Bonkers in.

[chuckles]

Hey, hey, hey, watch that pencil!

You could poke someone's eye out, mister!

Mi-mi! Mi-mi! Mi!

Mr. Doodles, we mustn't forget our friend,
The Little Horn.

[chuckles]

Run, Toots, run!

-Mi-mi-mi!
-[siren wails]

Mi-mi! Mi-mi!

Ah, ah!

[siren wails]

We don't need the horn anyway

because I still have you.

[chuckles]

Gee, at least somebody wants me.

Too bad he's a demented,
evil-loving toon collector

with pencils for fingers who wants
to preserve me under plastic forever.

[Lucky] Chief Kanifky, I've solved
the case of the missing toons.

[Chief] Uh, we had missing toons?

Oh! Oh, dear!

We shall start an immediate investigation.

Yes, I'll put our best officer
on the case.

[Lucky chuckles] No, no, no, sir.

You see, I've-- I've solved
the case of the missing toons.

Oh! You solved the case already?

Well, great work, Officer Pickle.

It's Piquel.

Keep it up, and you'll be wearing
captain's bars one day.

My luck...

It's finally changed!

[Toots] Mi-mi-mi!

You know, I think you and that toon
are going to make great partners.

Um...

-[stammers]
-About Bonkers, Sir...

the truth of the matter is--

-[knock on door]
-[Chief] Would you get that, Officer?

Mi-mi! Mi-mi-mi!

What do you want?

Mi-mi! Ah-ooo-ga!

Would you excuse me, Sir?
I have an urgent matter To take care of.

Certainly. Go right ahead, Officer.
[chuckles]

This had better be good.

Whoo!

Mi!

You got me out of the Chief's office
to show me a pencil?

Mi-mi! Mi-mi!

-Where'd you get this?
-Mi-Mi!

Honk! Honk!

Pencil, pencil shavings?

Honk! Ah-ooo-ga!

What's going on? Where's Bonkers?

Ah-ooo-ga!

Mi-mi! Mi-mi! Mi-mi!

He's been toon-napped?

Mi-mi! Uh-huh.

I can't believe I'm talking to a horn.

What's worse I can't really
understand what he's sayin'.

So Bonkers was right about
this missing toon thing after all.

And I was...

wrong.

What are you waiting for?

We've got to go save your friend
and my partner.

[ding]

Okay, okay. Where do we go?

-Mi-mi-mi-mi!
-Whoa! No, no, no, no!

[groans]

No. No, no, no.

Uh, skosh more to the... [mumbles] Right.

And [mumbles] bring his arm up.

Beautiful.

Well done, Mr. Doodles.

It's... [chuckles]

Perfection!

Oh, thanks. I feel much better now.

Now, remember, this is art,
so do try to smile.

Be sure to use plenty of steam,
Mr. Doodles. [chuckles]

I want the Bobcat wrinkle-free.

There's no way out. I'm doomed.

My fate is about to be sealed.

[groans] Mm, maybe not.

Mr. Doodles, I didn't say stop,
did I, did I? Hmm?

Why have you stopped?

[stutters] It wasn't me, Boss.

I pulled the plug
on your little operation.

You're under arrest, pal.

Lucky! Boy, am I glad to see you!

Say, what took you so long?

-I had to walk your dog.
-Uh-huh.

Drat! It's that cop again!

Quick, Mr. Doodles,
before my greatest work of art escapes!

[groans] Sorry about what I said before.

You were right about this case
all along... partner.

Partner?

Stop where you are!

Don't make me rub you out!

Bonkers, can you create a diversion?
I have a plan.

Okey-dokey, partner.

That's it. You've insulted me,
insulted my friends,

and insulted the Queen of France!

I challenge you to a duel, Sir!

Toon to toon.

Slapsticks at 30 paces.

A duel?

[chuckles] You fool!

You don't know who
you're up against. [chuckles]

I shall enjoy this!

Go on, you vile villain you.

Hit me with your best gag.

[blows raspberries]

Nobody gives me the raspberry!

Mr. Doodles...

man the prop box!

Not the, prop box.

I am waiting.

Don't dawdle, Mr. Doodles!

Do it!

Release...

the shoes!

[playing "Pop Goes the Weasel"]

[gulp]

Arriba! Arriba!

Yee-haw!

What's the matter, tongue-tied?

Mr. Doodles, bring out...

Mr. Custard!

I am coming for your face, Bobcat!

Mr. Doodles!

Enough!

Call forth...

the Anvil!

[neighs]

Yoo-hoo! Over here!

[skids]

[train horn blows]

[ticking]

Yippee!

Mr. Doodles! Where are you going?

Never mind about him.
You're coming with me.

-No, I'm not!
-Are, too!

-I'm not!
-Are, too!

-I'm not! I'm not!
-Are, too! Are, too!

-Are, too, too, too, too!
-Not, not, not, not!

Not!

Hey, wait a minute. He's got five fingers.

You're right, Lucky.

He's got five fingers!

[all] Five fingers!

Well, you've miscounted.

-[stutters]
-It's just a finger of your imagination.

[chuckles] I'm just-- I'm just
as much a toon as Mr. Doodles here.

Five fingers?

Five fingers.

Have him try the peel slide, Lucky.

The peel what?

The peel slide. Trust me.

Oh, yeah.

Ahem. Say, if you're a toon,
then you won't mind a little test.

Bonkers, do you have a banana peel on you?

Sure. I always carry one
in case of emergencies.

[Lucky]
Well, let's see you do the peel slide...

that is if you're toon enough.

[all gasp]

-The peel slide?
-The peel slide?

What--

ridiculous!

[stammers] I don't know what
you're talking about.

-[stammers] What-- This test...
-[chuckles] doesn't prove anything.

It proves you're not a toon.

No toon can resist the peel slide.

Whoa!

Right, Doodles?

Say it ain't so, Boss.

No! You're wrong!

[chuckles] I'm a toon.

I am! I am a toon!

Well, then explain this!

[gasp]

[gasps] No!

Watch out!

I'm a toon! I'm a [stammers] I'm a toon!

I'm a toon!

Poor guy.

He wasn't that bad for a demented,
fiendish, foul-playing villain.

You-- you don't mean he's...

Nah, he'll be okay.

They won't really hurt him.

Well, I guess this case is closed.

We'll ship him off to the big house as is.

[Bonkers] Our first case. I am so proud!

[Lucky]
You know, I never thought I'd say this,

but getting you as my partner
was the luckiest thing that--

Bonkers D. Bobcat!

I've been looking for you everywhere, kid!

I knew that Bicep Bill show would
never fly, [chuckles]

Not like you, Babe.
You'll be a star forever.

Bonkers, what I'm saying
is I want you back.

[cash register rings]

W.W. wants me back?
I'm gonna be a star again!

Yippee!

[stammers] What am I thinking?

I can't leave you like this, Lucky.

We're a team.

Thanks, Kid.

Uh, but, hey, wa--

you know, you-- you don't--
you don't have to stay on my account.

It sounds like a great offer. [chuckles]

Besides, I-- I-- I wouldn't
want to stand between you and your fans.

Well, if... if you're sure
that's what you want.

Yeah, oh, hey, I'm sure. You kidding me?

Go on. Be a star you little... nut.

Great!

Now, I'm thinking
long-term contract here, Kid.

Fifty, sixty years! What do you say?

[gulp]

Well... [sighs]

-I'm better off without him, really.
-[scoffs]

He pain anyway.

[stutters] Always laughing.

But you know...

I'm actually going to miss
that little... Bobcat.

You are?

Aha! I knew you wanted me, Partner!

You know, Lucky, this is the start
of a beautiful partnership.

What have I gotten myself into?

[theme music playing]