02x30 - Film Fatale/My Fair Chicken

[bunniefuu]

-[theme music playing]
-[barking]

[engine revs]

♪ I'm seeing lots of spots ♪

♪ Plenty of polka dots ♪

[barking]

♪ Get those puppies! ♪

♪ Can't catch a furry flurry ♪

♪ Running in a blurry hurry ♪

[barking]

♪ Get those puppies! ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Canines on the run ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Them doggone dogs are fun ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Without fail you'll wind up
chasing your tail ♪

♪ What's the harm
in revelrous adventures ♪

-♪ On the funny farm? ♪
-[clucks]

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

[barks]

♪ Life's just a bed of roses ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Fast friends with cold, wet noses ♪

-♪ 1-0-1 ♪
-♪ Through thick, thin, push and pull ♪

♪ It's 1-0-1
oh wonderful! ♪

♪ Just tons of fun ♪

♪ 101 Dalmatians! ♪

[rooster crows]

[snoring]

[yawns]

What do you wanna do
for fun today, Rolly?

Well, let's see now.

There's breakfast,
brunch, lunch!

Afternoon snack, high tea...

There's something new.

Oww!

Whoa, check this out!

The new Thunderbolt movie.

And it's showing at the CruellaPlex.

Gee, sure wish we could see it.

What's stopping us?

Can't you read?

It says, "No animals allowed!"

I'm not an animal, I'm a Dalmatian.

Maybe we should look
for another theater.

We're wasting time.

The matinee starts any minute.

We can just make it
to the last matinee.

Sneaking is bad, isn't it?

Lucky, your obsession
with Thunderbolt

has caused you to lose
your moral center.

But we have to sneak in.
They won't sell us tickets.

Oh, shifting the blame to others.

Good save!

We're just in time. [gasp]

[horn honking, tires screeching]

Welcome to the House of De Vil's
Concession Stand Collection,

exclusively at the CruellaPlex Theatre.

Now you can have good taste
and eat it, too.

Ha ha ha ha!

I'm wearing one of my delicious
new designs,

the Popcorn Poncho.

It even comes with butter flavoring.

Eeeee!

Now here's Jasperella
in our new line of gummy wear.

Floaty and functional
and, best of all, edible.

Isn't she sweet?

And here's Horacina
in our entree ensemble.

A sassy combination
of sausage and soda.

Eccch!

All our designs are on sale
at the concession stand.

Don't be afraid to make a fashion
statement, people.

They're scary, like you.

I take it back.

Be afraid, be very afraid!

Memo to myself:
repeal freedom of speech in Grutely.

[snickering]

Now's our chance, come on!

Tickets. Tickets, please.

[alarm bells ringing, woman gasps]

Hold on there, lady.

Sneaking in some confectionery
contraband today, are we, huh?

Listen, you'll buy it from us,
or it's bye-bye from us!

[Rolly] Ooh, wienies!

[alarm sounding]

Oh, nice try, mutt.

Heh heh heh! You buy your snacks
inside like everybody else.

Hey, hey, hey, stop that dog!

Somebody... Come here.
I'm gonna... Oh!

-[squawk!]
-Huh? Do we serve nuggets?

[Horace] No.

Hit the road, wishbone!

Way to go, Rolly.

I'm sure there's another way in.

You know what they say,
when one door closes,

another one opens.

Hey, they were right, Cadpig.

Look, the other door is open.

[Spot] How are we gonna get past
the delivery guy?

I have an idea. Follow me.

This box has been opened.
Are you shorting me again?

I'll count every straw.

But this is for the straws you said
you were shorted last week.

Oh, so it is.

Well, don't let it happen again,
or it'll be the last straw.

[chuckles]

We're in!

We're winners!

We're missing somebody.

Where's Rolly?

[munching]

[burp!]

Hey!

Get outta here!

Whoa!

Hey, lemme in, guys!

[Lucky] It's locked.
Is there another door?

Hold onto this licorice
with your teeth, Rolly.

Don't eat it!

You're kiddin', right?

[all] No!

Okay, but hurry!

I'm weakening.

[straining]

Whoaaa!

[crash!]

Come on, nothin's stoppin' us now.

One Popcorn Poncho, please.

Small, medium, or large?

Got one in a 42 large and lovely?

Only one customer?

How dare they resist my food fashions!

There's no accounting for taste.

We'll see about this!

Hmm?


Thread this up.

It's a little subliminal advertising
for the audience.

We made it!

Just in time, too.

[Man] Welcome to the
CruellaPlex Theatre...

No movie, unless you buy more
food from the concession stand!

Aaaaah!

[gasp]

It's true!

The camera does put on pounds.

Memo to myself: move up
liposuction appointment.

We've been spotted.

We were born that way, Luck.

It's part of who we are.

No, I mean we've been seen.

Oh, he's gonna tell Cruella!

[Lucky] Grab him!

[yipping]

Scorch, get out!
You're ruining my hair!

Catch them, you dolt!

I'll call the pound
and be rid of them.

Three down, 98 to go.

[Scorch] Yee-aaaa!

[squawking]

[yipping]

Do we serve nuggets?

No.

We do now!

[yipping]

Aaaaah!

Ugggh!

Ooomph!

[Horace whistling, pups yipping]

Hey, Aaaah!

-Oh...
-Oh...

[Cruella]
Ow, ooh, ooh, ow, oh!

[Announcer]
Thunderbolt!

[cheering]

Don't hold onto the past, Lucky.
Let it go.

Move on!

Catch it on cable!

[crunch]

Off me, you fools!

[alarm sounding]

[Lucky] I wish I could get
my mind off Thunderbolt.

I can still hear his theme music.

Don't listen!

That's just your subconscious
tormenting you.

It's tormenting me, too.
From over there!

[gasp]

What incredible kinetic power.

You are throwing
your subconscious!

That's not me.

It's coming
from over there.

[Thunderbolt theme playing]

Thunderbolt!

There you are, Lucky.
We were looking for you.

Shh! I don't wanna miss anything!

[crowd cheering]

"The end"? I don't believe this!

Oh, man, we went to all that trouble,
and the movie is here!

We thought you knew.

The paper was open to the ad
right where you left it.

Well, we were in such a hurry
to see the movie,

we didn't see the other ad.

[others] "We"?

Okay, okay, I was in a hurry.
Gimme a break.

We just want you to break free
of your impulsiveness, Lucky,

as quickly as possible.

Thanks to me we missed the movie
of a lifetime twice in one day.

Well, we can always come back tomorrow.

We can, really? All right!

Oh, I wish tomorrow would hurry up
and get here!

♪ Rrr... rrr... rrr ♪

♪ Rrrrrrrr! ♪

[puppies yipping]

[Spot squawking]

[gulp] Heh heh!

[laughter]

[Lucky] Who's up for Frisbee!

[Cornelia] Oh, yes, it should
be quite an evening.

Well, the Silver Egg Social
is the party of the year.

I dare say my little Missy
may just end up being

the Belle of the Ball. [chuckles]

Oh, really? Well,

don't be too sure my Spot
won't outshine her.

She's blossomed into the ideal picture
of chickenly refinement.

She's smart, polite, and...
if I do say so myself...

quite graceful.

Ptooey!

Well, I see you weren't
exaggerating one bit.

Let's just hope no one gets hurt.

[chuckles]

Spot!

The Silver Egg Social?
B-b-but that's for chickens!

Exactly. And it's time you started
acting like a chicken

instead of some bone-digging,
kibble-eating, tree-sniffing dog!

But I am a dog!

I'm a dog trapped in a chicken's body!

[panting]

I don't care if you're an aardvark
trapped in a baboon's pinkie,

you're going to the social!

And you'll act like a proper chicken

or I'm sending you out
to chicken finishing school!

[panting]

Finished!

It's my most brilliant design ever!

El Pollo Poncho!

Oh, Madam, it's, uh, different.

And, uh... and elegant.

Really?!

Well, oddly enough,
I don't need your expert opinion.

I need feathers. [chuckles]

Get me feathers!

[both] Owww!

You've got your feathers
in a knot for nothing, Spot.

Yeah, Spot, all you gotta do
is go to a party

and act like a chicken.

So, what's the problem?

Aaaah! I can't remember
how to act like a chicken.

I'm blankin' here!

[snarling]

There I go, chasing my tail again.

Eh, don't worry, Spot, we'll help you.

Sure, we'll teach you how
to act like a chicken.

Whaddya say?

I, uh, I think I have fleas.

-This wig itches.
-Shh!

The pigeons won't come if they think
we're after their feathers.

Then we gotta give 'em
more bird seed.

Ugggh!

Wait, you don't know what you're...

[straining] Give it!

No!

[both] Whoaaaa...

...aaaaa!

What we're going
for here, Spot,

is an oval shape.

You think you can do it?

I don't know. I never tried before.

Well, if you want to act
like a chicken, you've gotta try.

[straining]

[gasp] Ahhhh!

Okay, very good.

Now, think oval.

[straining]

[bell dings]

[Spot straining]

[straining continues]

[ding!]

[Lucky] I think we've got a problem.

[wild animals calling]

Are you sure this is
the ostrich section?

I don't see any ostrich-ches.

Positive. Now, let's start
collecting feathers.

[elephant trumpets]

Now, how does a proper chicken
eat dinner, Spot?

No, no, no, you're a chicken!

[needle scratches record]

You mean,
as in eat it off the ground?

Ewww! Gross!

I'm gonna have to agree with her here.

This whistle will attract
every purple-bellied gut warbler

within a 30-mile radius.

[soft chirping]

[frogs croaking]

I wonder why they won't come.

[snarling]

[Horace and Jasper shrieking,
alligator teeth chomping]

[Spot]
What am I gonna do?

The Silver Egg Social's in two hours
and I'm just not ready.

Shh! You have to relax if you're going

to get in touch with your inner chicken.

And all it takes to find it is
a little emotional flexibility

and some good
old-fashioned hypnosis.

-So?
-Did it work?

Uh, yep, it worked, all right.

[squawking]

I think I'm gonna lay an egg.


Are you cracked?!

It's called El Pollo Poncho,
not El Pillow Poncho!

[spitting feathers]

But, Miss Cruella, sir!

But, ma'am, the feathers...

Are duck feathers!

Pollo means chicken.

I need chicken feathers!

[both] Owwww!

[chickens murmuring]

[indistinct conversations]

Now, Spot, don't fret.
If you get flustered,

just do whatever
Mrs. Rockfeather's daughter does.

[Rockfeather] Oh, Cornelia, Spot!

I'm delighted you actually
had the nerve to come.

This is my daughter, Missy.

Well, why don't you two young ladies
go enjoy yourselves?

["Blue Danube Waltz" plays]

♪ Bawk-bawk bawk-bawk ♪

♪ Bawk-bawk bawk-bawk ♪

♪ Bawk-bawk bawk-bawk ♪

♪ Bawk-bawk bawk-bawk ♪

[wolf whistle]

[ah-ooga horn blows]

[bell rings]

♪ Bawk-bawk bawk-bawk ♪

Waaaa!

[shrieking]

Oh! Look at me!

And it's all your fault!

My fault?!

You and your ill-bred little pullet!

[sniffs]

I smell trouble.

[howling]

[laughter]

[Jasper] Ha ha! Feather jackpot!

[chickens squawking]

Here, chicky, chicky!
Here, chicky, chicky!

[squawking]

Whooo!

[snarling]

Aaaaah!

-[chomp!]
-Yow!

[squawking]

That's my daughter!

Someone help me!

[bawk-aaaa!]

Grrrrr! [barking]

Go, Mom!

[barking]

Ohhh!

Oh, Spot! Thank you!

I must say, you are one
remarkable little chicken.

-[squawk]
-[bawk-aaa!]

Hah! I got one!

Spot!

[puppies snarling]

[Horace] Whoaaa!

[barking]

I mean, uh, bawk-bawk-bawk-aaa!

Don't worry, Spot!

You can moo, baa, or hee-haw
if you want to.

You're fine, just the way you are.

And so are your friends.

Speaking of which,
where's your friend Missy?

Ptooey! [sighs]

They got me!

[theme music playing]