02x15 - Full Metal Pullet/Dough the Right Thing

[bunniefuu]

-[theme music playing]
-[barking]

[engine revs]

♪ I'm seeing lots of spots ♪

♪ Plenty of polka dots ♪

[barking]

♪ Get those puppies! ♪

♪ Can't catch a furry flurry ♪

♪ Running in a blurry hurry ♪

[barking]

♪ Get those puppies! ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Canines on the run ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Them doggone dogs are fun ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Without fail
you'll wind up chasing your tail ♪

♪ What's the harm
in revelrous adventures ♪

-♪ On the funny farm? ♪
-[clucks]

-♪ 1-0-1 ♪
-[barks]

♪ Life's just a bed of roses ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Fast friends with cold, wet noses ♪

-♪ 1-0-1 ♪
-♪ Through thick, thin, push and pull ♪

♪ It's 1-0-1 oh wonderful! ♪

♪ Just tons of fun ♪

♪ 101 Dalmatians! ♪

[puppies yipping]

Ready, Lucky? Tripod?

On your mark... get set...

Lieutenant Pug, sir!

While Colonel Creampuff is away,
I'm in charge!

Got it?

Yes, sir! How very
"take charge" of you, sir.

On your mark, get set, go!

[dogs shouting]

Three-leg wins!

[panting]

Again!

And now for your reward.

Hit the deck and give me... 20!

Aww!

And you, loser boy,

hit the deck and give me... 50!

Yes, sir.

[puppies yipping,
Lucky straining]

[groaning]

Ohhh!

[snarls]

Hit the deck and give me 20.
three...

I got it, I got it!

[blows whistle]

What a bunch of pathetic
crybabies you are!

By this time next week,

we'll be running the drill
on unit cohesion.

-Huh?
-Unit cohesion.

My favorite!

All of us working together
as one big dog.

What's your name, soldier?!

Cadpig, sir.

Hit the deck, pig dog,
and give me 30... seven!

You know, sir,
the use of pejorative labels

only gives you the illusion of power.

Make that 38!

When I give the order,
you will divide into two teams

to practice the Bark Brigade march.

You will learn how to march
the same, sound the same,

look the same.

Those of you who cohese
may become cadets.

Do you hear me?

Yes, sir!

You, Three-leg, and you, loser boy,

you two are my team leaders.

Huh! Must be my lucky day.

Yes, sir!

[Pug] Pick your teams!

Duke.

[shrieks]

I'll take... the bucket.

-Ohh.
-We're waiting, recruit-cake.

Okay, okay. I'll take Spot.

Yippee!

Oww!

Yeah, this is gonna work out just great.

Okay, when I give the count, march!

Ruff-ruff, 1, 2.

Ruff-ruff, 3, 4.

Ruff-ruff, 1, 2.

Ruff-ruff, 3, 4.

[Tripod] Steppin' proud
with head held high,

raise my feet up to the sky.

March from sunup till it's dark,

feel my thunder, hear my bark...

Look at them.
Did you see that?

I know what
you're thinking.

They look better than we do.

And it's the chicken's fault.

At least you got one thing right.

We're supposed to march
the same and sound the same

and look the same.

We're supposed to be one big dog.

Well, we're close. We're one big dog
and a chicken.

Yeah, b-but I can be a big dog.

Just give me a chance, will ya?
Watch this!

Ohh! Awww! Whaaaaaa!

Klutzy chicken.

[whimpering]

Lucky, what's the matter?

-You guys, we gotta get rid of Spot.
-Why?

To get into the cadets,
we have to look like a team.

She just doesn't fit in.

Let's celebrate our differences.

There's a little chicken in all of us.

We'll just spread our wings
and have a group cluck.

[squawking]

I'm with Lucky.
How do we get the chicken to leave?

Easy. We make it her idea.

[puppies yipping]

Wag your tails, troops!

Left, right, left, right.

I said wag your tail, chicken!

I'm waggin', I'm waggin'!

And what's with
the two-legged walk?

Hey, two legs are all I've got.

Listen, chicken,
if you wanna hang with the dogs,

you've gotta walk
like a dog.

Hmm.

[chuckles]

I don't know what looks funnier:

a bunch of puppies playing army,

or a chicken who thinks she's a dog.

Is this the Bark Brigade
or the B-b-b-bawk Brigade?

[chuckles]

I'm doing my best, sir.

[Pug] Oh, yeah?

Let's see what you got.

Fall in!

Left face! Forward march!

You can take the chicken
out of the henhouse,

but you can't take the smell
out of the chicken.

P-U!

Take a bath, feather girl!

Ah-ha, really, sir.

Must you resort to cheap
personal hygiene jokes

simply to assert your authority?

[glass shatters]

I was talking to that dumb cluck,
not you!

So why don't you just drop
and give me...

uh... Thirty... seven!

[snoring]

I am not dumb, sir! And I don't smell.

And even though you are
my ranking officer,

you have no right
to speak to me that way.

So, if you don't mind,
I'd appreciate you showing me

a little more respect in the future.

That's it, recruit. You're out!

You'll never be a cadet
as long as you live!

What a coincidence.

I was just leaving.

Well, recruits.

Looks like you don't have
a platoon anymore.

And without a platoon,
you can't march in the drill,

which means you can kiss
the Bark Brigade goodbye.

[kissing]

Ha ha! Heh heh heh heh!

Well, you happy now?

She may be just a chicken,
but she was our chicken!

Hey, I'm the team leader, I can do...

What kind of team leader
let's a teammate get grilled like that?

Hmm.

Uh, is it just me,
or is anybody else hungry?

What was I supposed to do,
stand up for a chicken?

I didn't even want her on the team.

Us dogs gotta stick together.

Guys?

[snoring]

[Pug laughs, Lucky gasps]

-Aaaah!
-[squawking]

[laughter]

Aaaaah!

[panting] I gotta talk to Spot!

Hmm. And what are
you doing here?

Look, I couldn't even see
beyond my own spots.

And I didn't think about how to make
the most of our dog-chicken team.

I wasn't much of a leader to let
Lieutenant Pug talk to you that way.

And what I said wasn't much better.

So I guess what I'm trying to say is...
I'm sorry.

Keep talking.

Well, it was really brave the way you
stood up to Lieutenant Pug.

I wouldn't have had
the guts to do that.

And look where it got me.

Right back in the henhouse
with no chance of becoming a cadet.

-Not necessarily.
-Huh?

I have a plan.

March from sunup till it's dark,
feel my thunder, hear my bark.

What's Pug gonna say?

Who cares?
The important thing is, we cohesed.

-Ready, troops?
-[both] Ready.

Charge!

[Pug] Hmmm?

[marching band plays]

[bawk-aaa!]

[ba-ba-bawk!]

[bawk!]

[bawk!]

[b-b-bawk!]

That was the most disgusting display

of insubordination
I have ever seen!

You are all a disgrace!

-You are nothing...
-Ahem!

[chuckles]

Colonel, ha ha, sir.

What are you doin' here?

Well, I couldn't miss
this great moment,

seeing you welcome
each of these fine pups

into the Bark Brigade.

-Isn't that right, Lieutenant?
-Sir, yes, sir!

Very good. Carry on, Lieutenant.

Tripod, you and your team
displayed hard work and precision.

And, Lucky, you get
special mention for your...

uh, creativity, yes.

Yes, very, uh, creative.

[cadets cheering]

[howling]

[tire screeching]

Uh, thanks for the ride, Cruella.

You owe me.

[birds screech]

Cruella's purse!

And it's full of moolah!

Finally, I can have that crystal gazer's
mood collar I've always wanted.

Finally, I can have
that Thunderbolt P.I. spy set.

[boom!]

Finally, I can have that afternoon

at the Royal Hydrant Day Spa
for Dogs.

Whoa, wait a minute! Hold on, stop!

We cannot spend this money.
It's not ours.

We have to return it.

Return it? Hah!

We don't even really know
who it belongs to.

Besides, Spot, ever hear of,
"Finders keepers, losers weepers"?

Nice try.

But it's clearly Cruella's purse.

And I'll give you two good reasons
why we should return it.

One, it's not our money to spend,

and two, she might think
Anita stole it.

And Anita does not need
that kind of trouble.

I didn't even think
of that consequence.

I've been so selfish.

I forgive myself.

[thunder]

[Spot] Somebody's gotta
take it up there.

[Lucky] Well, I'm not going.

-Ugggh!
-[doorbell rings]

Hmm, never thought of that option.

Well, I, for one, am glad we did
the right thing and returned...

Anita's purse?

[all] Anita's purse?

$1,582.

Why, that's the exact amount

of Reggie and Anita's
monthly mortgage payment.

[gasp]

Hmm, I suppose I should
return it to Anita.

Then again, finders keepers,
losers weepers!

[cackling]

-[gulp]
-[Rolly] Thanks to you,

we could be in really big trouble.

Oh, no, I am not your scape-chicken.

You're in this mess with me.

Well, I guess it wasn't so clear that
it wasn't Cruella's purse after all.

Yeah, we just assumed
that it was Cruella's purse.

We didn't even think to look beyond
the moolah to see the other evidence.

Boy, jumping to conclusions
sure is expensive.

Okay, we made a mistake,
but we can fix it before it's too late.

Come on, we gotta get it back.

Oh, and I suppose
you think Cruella's

just gonna leave the money
in some easy-to-get-to place.

Cruella!

[Cruella] Now, where should I
put the money?

Oh, I know, I'll put it right here.

[kisses] [chuckles]

You were saying?

Wait a minute. I can't put it there.

Some mangy, sniveling puppy
might sneak in and steal it.

Where can I hide it?

No, no, no, no, too wet.

Too... [coughs]… dusty.

Uhhh! Too smelly.

You could hide it in a shoebox
in your closet.

Yeah, I hide all my shoeboxes
in the closet.

Uggh! You're fired!

I've got to find
the perfect hiding place.

Hmm. [gasp]

I know, I'll hide it
in a shoebox in my closet!

Hmm, but I'll need guards.

You two, you're hired.

This is watchdog 1.
East wing clear, over.

This is, uh... wiener dog 7.

Uh, whatever you said, over.

Look at 'em.

[Spot] They'll never leave their posts.

[Rolly] They're like robots.

Where there's a strategy,
there's a way.

It just takes knowing the weakness
of the enemy.

And I have a pretty good idea
what their weaknesses are.

Here's the plan.

Welcome to the Commercial Channel.

All commercials, all the time!

And now a word from our sponsor.

Wiener dog. [sniffing]
Do you smell something?

No. Over. [sniffing]

Wait a minute.
Wait a minute, watchdog.

I smell junk food.

And I hear a TV!

[both] Ohh!

[whistles]

[man] And that's not all.

With your $48.95 purchase
of Rugley's Clip-on Hair,

you'll also receive our new
Clip-on Pen absolutely free!

Clip-on Pen!

Oh, if only I had the money!

[Lucky] Cruella's closet!

[all] Wow!

A closet says so much about
a person's innermost being.

I sense Cruella's closet is saying...

"I think I'm gonna throw up"?

Forget what the closet is saying.

Cruella said she hid Anita's money
inside a shoebox.

[Cadpig] She sure does like shoes.

[Lucky] And I bet you anything
it's in the one at the very, very top.

And your reasoning is...?

'Cause it's the hardest one
to get to, that's why.

Wait a minute.

Let's not jump to conclusions
like we did when we assumed

that this was Cruella's purse.

That's what got us into this mess
in the first place.

Maybe Cruella was thinking
that we'd think that she'd think

to put it in the very hardest place!

Maybe she put it in a perfectly easy
and obvious place like right here.

Hey, I was right.

[rumbling]

Aaaaaah!

Making toast is as easy
as making toast

with the toast toaster toaster oven!

Yours for three easy
installments of $79.95.

Toasting filament not included.

If only I had the money.

Come on, let's get outta here!

The door's gone!

Where's the door?
Where's the door?

Oh, no, we're stuck... stuck...
stuck in here forever!

Become a professional ballerina
in three easy lessons

for only $99.99.

[both] If only we had the money.

Hey, watchdog,
we could borrow some money

from that purse in the closet.

And how would we pay it back,
wiener dog?

Are you low on cash?

Dying to borrow money
but don't know how to pay it back?

Play Super Duper Legal State Lottery!

The jackpot is up to $29 trillion!

[both, chuckling] Ahhh!

Doggone it!

[Horace] We'll win the lottery,
repay the money,

and buy all the cool stuff
we saw on the television.

-Quick, everybody...
-Panic!

Don't panic. Creativity has no limits.

I know, make like fuzzy slippers!

[Jasper] Just find the money, Horace.

She hid it in a shoebox.

Ah, look how cute.

I've just gotta try these on.

[gasp] The money!

-[chomp!]
-Yowwww!

Watchdog, help! The slippers are
stealing the money!

It's just the puppies,
you wiener dog!

Get 'em!

-Where did they go?
-I feel pretty.

Welcome to Cruella's
automated closet.

Please keep your paws
inside the coat at all times.

On your left, business suits,
casual suits, law suits.

On your right, evening wear,
swimwear, underwear.

[dogs] Yuck!

Bellbottoms and bloomers,
hip-huggers and boots, skirts,

petticoats and pantaloons,
muumuus and miniskirts,

cardigans and kimonos,
tutus and t-shirts,

and, just ahead, lingerie!

Aaaaaaah!

Ohhhh!

Hmm. [chuckles]

Ohh! Why, you!

You know, with the right belt,
that would look fabulous!

[gasp] Roger!
Here's the purse right here.

Ah, thank goodness.

We did it. We returned Anita's purse
and we saved the farm!

To think we were gonna spend
that money like it was ours. Over.

Roger that.

It's just like posing
as a security guard, over.

[theme music playing]