02x14 - The Best Ears of Our Lives

[bunniefuu]

[quirky music playing]

Then I said,
that's not what you said yesterday.

And-- Oops, hold on, Lisa,
that's the other line.

-Just a second.
-[Dinah meows]

Hello? Oh, hi, Jennifer.

I'm talking to Lisa on the other line.

Okay, I'll tell her. Bye.

-[Dinah meows]
-Hold on, Dinah.

Lisa, that was Jennifer.
She said that she's gonna call you.

[mom] Alice, you've been on that phone
long enough.

Okay, Mom!

Lisa, I've got to go.

Call me after Jennifer calls you. Bye.

I know Mom gets tired of it,

but I like talking to my friends
on the phone.

On the other hand,
sometimes it's more fun to talk in person.

[theme music playing]

♪ Hold on to your seat
Let's go for a ride ♪

♪ Now that we're here on the other side ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme and a dance or two ♪

♪ It's a curious place
With a wonderful crew ♪

♪ And you're never quite sure
What they will do ♪

♪ Use your imagination
You'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

Ooh! Look at this one, Alice.

Chrome wheels, gold-plated steering wheel,
velvet seats.

That's the fanciest golf cart
I've ever seen.

And it's got a fancy price too.

I wanna look good
at the Wonderland golf tournament,

but I'd also like to be able to afford
a few golf ba*ls.

Do you really need a golf cart?

Couldn't you just walk?

And get grass stains on my new golf shoes?
No way.

Driving a golf cart looks really fun.

Did I hear someone mention
golf carts?

Just a moment.
I'm showing something to Alice.

It just so happens
I know something about--

Oh, look at this, the Redsle!

I've heard that it isn't well made.

Oh! AM/FM cassette, radial tires,
driver side airbag and fuzzy dice!

All included!

About the Redsle, a leading
Wonderland consumer magazine said...

-Ooh! Look, it comes in royal red!
-"The worst golf cart ever made."

Is it expensive?

That's the best thing about it,
it's half the cost of the other model.

-I don't think--
-Boy, Your Majesty,

-you'll really be riding in style.
-Yes!

♪ Cruising through the greenery
You brighten up the scenery ♪

♪ Everyone will look at your smile ♪

♪ In your royal red golf cart
You'll be looking real smart ♪

♪ You really will be riding in style ♪

♪ Why, it's got everything you need ♪

♪ And a whole lot more indeed ♪

♪ Satisfaction mile after mile ♪

♪ It will be a lot of fun ♪

♪ I'll bet you get a hole in one ♪

♪ You really will be riding in style ♪

♪ You'll look grand on the links
You'll get whistles and winks ♪

♪ People will be watching all the while ♪

♪ With your new golf cart
You might sh**t under par ♪

♪ You really will be riding in style ♪

♪ You really will be riding in style ♪

I hear the Redsle isn't a good buy.

What's that, Mr. Rabbit?

I was just saying, as golf carts go--

"Golf carts go" is right at this price.
I bet they'll go fast.

Come on, Alice. I'll let you honk the horn
and go like this with the steering wheel.

That's all very well and good,
Your Majesty.

I said it's just-- Why, yes...

Getting ready for the big golf tournament?

-Drivers.
-Drivers.

I said, getting ready
for the big golf tournament, eh?

-Be with you in a minute. Irons.
-Irons.

-Putters.
-Putters.

What time does the tournament start?

-It starts at--
-I don't know.

What I want to know is,
will the winner win great prizes?

Yes. The winner will receive a trophy--

They must have a trophy or something.

We'll just ask the Queen,
after all it's her tournament.

As I was saying--

We'd love to stay and talk
but now that our bags are loaded

-we need to take a few practice swings.
-Right.

I don't know if you know
but there's a big golf tournament today.

Thing is, the Queen wasn't paying
any attention to me.

-She completely ignored what I said.
-Fascinating, Rabbit.

Hare, do you remember
the first rule of golfing?

I before E except after tee?

No, no. The first rule of golfing is,
funny clothes must be worn at all times.

And...

-Oh, now. Here. This is you.
-I don't think--

This is a sweater.

-And this is me.
-Oh, yes.

I might as well have been a potted plant.

You want a potted plant?
Why didn't you speak up? I have an extra.

-[shouts]
-Here we go.

No. The way they were ignoring me--

-In the meantime, I'll try these on.
-Good idea.

Uh-huh. Okay. All right, let's-- Hmm.
I don't know what I think.

-Rabbit, what do you think?
-Well--

Now that I see the outfit on you,
I don't think I like it.

-Actually--
-I agree.

I don't think it's colorful enough.

I think I've got more golf clothes
upstairs. Come on.

I can always count on you.

Well, what I think
is I'm tired of being ignored!

I'm sorry, did you say something?

Oh.

Ooh.

Ah.

I can't take it anymore, I tell you.

I'm sorry, could you repeat that?

Yes, I was saying,
I'm tired of being ignored--

I'm sure no one means to ignore you.

They're probably just distracted.

You know, busy paying attention
to something more interesting.

Well, everyone's always too distracted.
Nobody ever listens to me.

Whatever I say to people
just goes in one ear and out the other.

Ooh!

I wish there was some way
I could get even with them all.

Oh. I'm not sure that's such a good idea.

-Listen to this story.
-"Listen to this story." Yes.

"Once there was a farmer
named Even-Steven.

He liked everything to be perfectly even.

His fences were perfectly even.

His corn rows were perfectly even.

Even all of his animals
were perfectly even.

Well, almost all of his animals were even.

The ducks were something of a problem.

They tended to be... uneven.

Whenever Even-Steven
asked them to get in line,

they would just answer with wise quacks.

So Even-Steven decided to get even
with the ducks by selling them.

He loaded the ducks into a boat
to take them to town.

And of course, Even-Steven
wanted to look good when he got to town.

He was determined
to keep his boat on an even keel.

So he tried to arrange the ducks evenly.

And finally Even-Steven learned

that sometimes you lose out
when you try too hard to get even."

[quacks]

So you see, trying to get even
with everyone for ignoring you isn't...

Uh, Rabbit, are you listening?

Oh! oh.

You know, I was just thinking.

The best way to get even with someone
is to say nothing.

-What good will that do?
-Simple. Simple.

The next time they need
my expert advice on something,

I won't give it to them.

They will soon learn that they
should have paid more attention to me.

Goodbye.

-One.
-Two.

-Three.
-Fore!

[ball zinging]

Whoa! That's quite a slice
you've got, Hare.

Thank you, Dum.

I haven't practiced all these years
for nothing.

How true that is.

You always have the highest score
on the golf course.

[upbeat music playing]

♪ Bogey, ogey, bogey, ogey ♪

♪ We know what we're doing
When we're out on the course ♪

♪ We score the highest
Using every resource ♪

♪ We swing with ease and expertise ♪

♪ You know, folks, it's swing time ♪

♪ Swing once, swing twice ♪

♪ It doesn't matter
If you divot or slice ♪

♪ Swing once, swing again ♪

♪ Keep on swinging
Till the count of ten ♪

♪ We know what we're doing
When we're out on the course ♪

♪ We take aim, we enjoy the game ♪

-♪ It's no joke
-That's the way we stroke ♪

♪ You know, folks, it's swing time ♪

♪ Swing once, swing twice ♪

♪ It doesn't matter
If you divot on slice ♪

♪ Swing once, swing again ♪

♪ Keep on swinging
Till the count of ten ♪

-♪ One, three, five, seven, nine
-Two, four, six, eight ♪

♪ You know, folks, it's swing time ♪

-[laughing]
-Watch out.

Whoa! Uh-oh!

-Excuse me, Hare.
-Yeah?

But in golf,
it's the lowest score that wins.

-It is?
-Yes.

You could probably use a golf lesson.

There's Rabbit.
He's always been the Queen's golf coach.

-Maybe he can help you fix your swing.
-Rabbit.

Do you know enough about golf
to help me with my swing?

Just as I thought,
now they need to know what I think.

Well, too bad.

-Yes. I know a lot about golf.
-Great.

Just because I do know how to help
doesn't mean I will.

Oh, sure.

Because you want to win the tournament,
you don't wanna help me.

It's not that. It's just...

I-- No one ever listens to me,
so why should I--

If Rabbit won't help,
maybe I could teach you a thing or two.

How about a swing or two?

-Okay.
-Great idea!

This is ridiculous!

What does a bunny have to do
to get people to listen to him?

Is it so much to ask
that people be willing to lend an ear?

Lend you an ear?
Looks like you got plenty already.

Very funny, Cat.

I mean, I want everyone
to pay attention to me.

Aw, you feel ignored?

Are you kidding?

I'm beginning to feel as if I'm invisible.

You're not invisible. Trust me.

I know all about these things. La!

Yeah... Yes.

Maybe everyone's so distracted
by the big golf tournament

that they aren't noticing me.

You know what your problem is?
You're too soft spoken.

-What do you mean?
-[clearing throat]

[shouting] You need to speak up!

[in normal voice] See my point?

You think by raising my voice
I'll get people to listen to me?

Absolutely. Trust me.
Nobody can ignore a bellowing bunny.

[purrs]

So loud, you say?

Really loud. Trust me, can't fail.

[shouting] Hello, Dormouse!
How are you today? Would you like to chat?

Sorry, can't hear you,
the music's too loud.

[in normal voice] Can't fail, eh?

Come on, is it my fault
he was wearing headphones?

Come on, we'll try again.

After you. I mean, uh...

Ah, Alice, something to show you.
Here it is.

Look, the newest flower in my garden.
A royal fi-lily.

Wow, they're beautiful.

I've never actually raised my voice
to the Queen before.

You want the Queen to hear
what you have to say

about not buying that golf cart,
don't you?

I've never seen a flower like this.

Of course you haven't,
it's a royal fi-lily.

It only grows in royal gardens
such as mine.

[upbeat music playing]

♪ It came in the mail
As a little tiny seed ♪

♪ The catalog said
It was from my royal breed ♪

♪ I put it in the ground
Cared for its every need ♪

♪ My efforts paid off for sure
It's finally a flower ♪

♪ I checked its progress regularly ♪

♪ Only the best for my royal fi-lily ♪

♪ I spared no expense
Because I assumed ♪

♪ It would be an eye pleaser
When it bloomed ♪

♪ It came in the mail
As a little tiny seed ♪

♪ The catalog said
It was from my royal breed ♪

♪ I put it in the ground
Cared for its every need ♪

♪ My efforts paid off for sure
It's finally a flower, the royal fi-lily ♪

♪ It's finally a flower
Oh, so nice ♪

Oh, my little babies. Look at this!

Oh, Rabbit.

[shouting] Wow! What a beautiful

flower!

Oops.

Hey, Rabbit.

Need any help
gluing that flower back together?

Go-- [coughs]

[scratchy voice] Go away,
you've been quite enough help.

Not only do I have a sore throat
from all that yelling

but the Queen is angry with me.

So the Queen is a little cranky,
at least she heard you.

She heard me,
she just didn't listen to me.

What's the difference?

The difference is,
she didn't hear what I said,

just how loud I said it.

Huh! The way my throat feels now,

I won't be raising my voice
for quite a while.

Oh, well, who knows?

Perhaps after the golf tournament is over,
everyone won't be so distracted

and people will finally start...

I said, people will finally start...

paying attention to me.

Oh! Welcome to the Wonderland
golf tournament, everyone.

I know everyone's anxious
to get to the first tee.

We had tea before we came.

I couldn't drink another cup
if you paid me.

[groans] But before we get started,

I'd like to show off
my brand new golf cart.

Alice, shall we?

Wow.

Very nice, Your Majesty.

A bug reflector screen, nice touch.

-I like the fuzzy dice.
-Me too.

They say "Hey world, I've got class.
I've got taste. I have arrived."

What I love
is that brand new golf cart smell.

It smells like oil leaking to me.

-Is something wrong, Mr. Rabbit?
-Well, actually--

Stand back, everyone.

It's time to take this baby for a spin.

[all laughing]

Forward, h*!

I think the golf course is that way.

You have to put in forward.

It is in forward
but I'm still going backward.

What's wrong with this thing?

Maybe it goes forward
when you put it in reverse.

-Oh.
-Very smart.

-Yeah, that worked.
-Hey, hey, hey!

Your Majesty.

[indistinct chatter]

[crashes]

-Your Majesty, are you all right?
-I'm fine.

But that golf cart is a piece of junk!

I wish somebody would've warn me
before I wasted my money!

-Actually, Your Majesty--
-What did you say?

I hope you saved the receipt,
Your Majesty.

I was just saying when I--

-What?
-It's not a total loss.

At least the steering wheel
is still in good shape

[indistinct chatter]

Quiet, everyone.
Rabbit is trying to speak.

I was just saying,
when I tried to tell you that

that brand of golf cart
was no good, you...

Ah. I see.

-I was so distracted that I didn't listen.
-Oh.

I'm sorry, Mr. Rabbit,
I didn't pay attention to you either.

Actually, I think we're all guilty
of ignoring you now and then.

Well, I for one, will ignore you no more.

Congratulations, Rabbit.

That was a great trick you used
to get me to pay attention to you.

-Trick?
-You obviously knew instead of yelling...

Or saying nothing at all.

...if you talk very softly,

we would all be so curious
what you were saying

that we'd be quiet and listen
for a change.

-That was really smart, Mr. Rabbit.
-Oh, yeah-- [coughing]

It would have been smarter
if I had done it on purpose.

Of course you did it on purpose,
now don't be modest.

Right, we won't hear of it.

[upbeat music playing]

-♪ When Rabbit speaks
-People listen ♪

♪ When Rabbit speaks ♪

-♪ When the rooster crows
-You get up ♪

♪ When the signal light turns green
You've got to go ♪

-♪ When the oven bell rings
-You turn it off ♪

♪ And when Rabbit speaks, people listen ♪

-♪ When a shirt need mending
-You sew it up ♪

-♪ When you're treated to a movie
-It's thanks so much ♪

-♪ When you're swinging on a rope
-You hang on tight ♪

♪ And when Rabbit speaks ♪

♪ When Rabbit speaks, people listen ♪

♪ He's an educated bunny ♪

♪ We all listen ♪

♪ It's not wise to ignore such a fellow ♪

♪ It's time to pay attention
So he needn't shout or bellow ♪

♪ When Rabbit speaks, people listen ♪

♪ When Rabbit speaks, we all listen ♪

♪ We'll all listen ♪

[meows]

I know, Dinah, I've been spending
so much time on the phone,

I guess I've been ignoring you a little.
So from now on, I promise that--

-[phone ringing]
-Oops.

Hello. Oh, hi, Lisa. Sure.

I'd better call you back, there's someone
I need to spend a little time with.

Okay. Bye.

Sorry, Dinah, you were saying?

[meows]

[theme music playing]

♪ That's all for now
But we'll see you again ♪

♪ Come back real soon
Now that we're all friends ♪

♪ Where every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme and a dance or two ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventures in Wonderland ♪