03x18 - Time Warped

[bunniefuu]

[upbeat music playing]

["Für Elise" playing on keyboard]

Dinah, if I have to practice
my piano piece one more time,

I'm going to scream.

I wish there was a way I could jump ahead
so my recital would be over.

Come on, you know what a recital is.

It's a music program

where the students play their pieces
for the people in the audience.

If you hit a bunch of clunkers,
it could be embarrassing.

What computer game do I want to play?

Well, I'm just taking
a short break, Dinah.

I'm entitled. I'm as ready
as I'll ever be for that recital.

I can get all the way through my piece
without hitting a single wrong note. Heh.

Okay, so maybe I do hit
one or two clunkers

and maybe I should practice
so I don't regret it.

I need to get away from it for a while.

I know just the place to go
for a quick getaway.

[theme music playing]

♪ Hold on to your seat
Let's go for a ride ♪

♪ Now that we're here on the other side ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme and a dance or two ♪

♪ It's a curious place
With a wonderful crew ♪

♪ And you're never quite sure
What they will do ♪

♪ Use your imagination
You'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

[Mad Hatter scatting]

Uh, no.

-Would you hand me the wrench?
-Yeah.

Thank you.

-No, the monkey wrench.
-Oh!

Oh.

-Thank you.
-Yeah.

[humming] Yeah, aha, there.

Our time machine is ready for a test run.

Did you really build a machine
that can take a person

forward and backward in time?

Not just one person. This time machine
can comfortably seat four adults.

And still have room for a dormouse
in the glove compartment.

-Want to travel into the past with us?
-No, thanks. I was just there yesterday.

Suit yourself.

But personally I am going to take
some time out for time travel.

[pop music playing]

♪ We can travel through time
With this machine ♪

♪ Great mysteries and secrets
We'll unravel ♪

♪ We'll see things
That no one else has seen ♪

♪ It's time now for time travel ♪

♪ We're incredible creators ♪

♪ You and me ♪

♪ Now we can journey back
Through history ♪

♪ We can go explore millions of years ♪

♪ And see if dinosaurs
Had business careers ♪

♪ Yes, it's time to travel through time ♪

♪ Perhaps we could prevent our crime ♪

♪ Our new invention is sure a winner ♪

♪ We can program it
To bring us back by dinner ♪

♪ And we'll travel through time
With this time machine ♪

♪ Great mysteries and secrets
We'll unravel ♪

♪ We'll see things
That no one else has seen ♪

♪ It's time now for time travel ♪

♪ Time now for time travel ♪

Whoa! Ha!

-Hare, I just had a thought.
-Uh-oh.

Since we now have the means
to go back in time,

we could help out a friend
who regrets having done something.

You're right. If somebody is sorry
for something he did,

we can travel into the past
and stop him before he does it.

And then humbly accept thank-yous, kudos
and modest tokens of appreciation.

Let's take a stroll around Wonderland
and see if we can find someone

who wishes he could go back
and change the past.

-Here we go.
-Oh, yeah.

[mischievous music playing]

I can't remember
when I've been so embarrassed.

Duchy tricked me into coming
to a party loaded with her friends,

and then skunked me in five games
of Frivolous Pursuit.

Frivolous Pursuit?
I've never heard of that game.

You answer questions
that are trivial, silly, slight, trite,

and completely unworthy
of serious consideration.

I couldn't answer a single one.

-That's bad?
-Of course it's bad.

I've always prided myself on being
an expert on useless information.

Oh, Alice.

I just wish I'd never gone there.

Did you hear that?

If only I hadn't let the duchess talk me
into going to that party yesterday.

I made a fool out of myself.

I'll regret it for the rest of my life.

If I could only turn back time.

[rock music playing]

♪ If I could turn back time
I know I surely would ♪

♪ If I could turn back time
I know I surely would ♪

♪ I'd turn back time
And make a bad thing good ♪

♪ If I could turn back time
So many things I'd do ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ If I could turn back time
So many things I'd do ♪

♪ I'd make everything red
That now we see is blue ♪

♪ If I could turn back time
So many things I'd change ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ If I could turn back time
So many things I'd change ♪

♪ My life I would completely rearrange ♪

♪ If I could turn back time
I'd do it right away ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ If I could turn back time
I'd do it right away ♪

♪ And I wouldn't go to that party ♪

♪ Yesterday ♪

If I knew then what I know now,

I'd have given a million wobucks
to somebody

if he'd just stopped me
from going to see the duchess.

Well, Hare,
looks like we found our person.

Somebody who wishes she could go back
and change the past.

Who would have though Her Majesty
would have any regrets?

Except of course
for unsightly "ring around the turban."

At last, we can do something
for our deserving queen.

We'd do this even if we weren't gonna
get a token of appreciation.

-We would? Oh, of course we would.
-Mm-hm.

But a million tokens of appreciation
sure wouldn't hurt.

[both shouting]

Quick, into the time machine.

Hare. Do you have to slam the door?

-Ooh, sorry.
-Yeah, all right.

Let's set the time.

Three o'clock.

Excuse me, but my watch stopped.

Do you have the time?

As a matter of fact we do. It's 3:00.

That's a goofy-looking timepiece.

It's not a timepiece, it's a time machine.

It can take a person forward
or backward in time.

Here, we'll show you.

We've set the time, now we'll set the day.
From today to yesterday.

Stand back, Cat! Once I throw this switch,

the time machine
will completely disappear from today.

And reappear in yesterday.

-How will you know it worked?
-Well, we'll know it worked

because you won't be here to ask the time.

Hmm?

You see, yesterday at 3:00,
you showed up to borrow a pint of cream.

So see you later, Cat.

-Or should we say, see you yesterday?
-[both laugh]

[Mad Hatter & Hare shouting]

Hmm.

That goofy gizmo never disappeared
into the past. It's still sitting there.

Hmm. But I've got an idea

how I can make those two dizzy
time travelers think it worked. [laughs]

-Woo-hoo!
-Oh.

Hatter.

Is it yesterday yet?

Let's find out.

Look, the control panel says "yesterday."

We're back in the past!

Excuse me, may I borrow a pint of cream?

You sure may.

Here.

Thank you.

That proves it.

The time machine works.

Right, because the Cat borrowed cream
like he did yesterday.

Today. Yesterday.

-Today.
-There isn't time right now

for the obligatory time-travel confusion.

We've got to get to the palace

and stop the queen
from going to see the duchess.

[mischievous music playing]

Hare, do you have to slam the door?

-Oh, sorry.
-Yeah.

Ooh, we'd better hide this.

We sure wouldn't want anyone to take it
and leave us stranded in the past.

I'll say. I had a miserable day yesterday.

-Today. Yesterday.
-Alrighty.

Today. Yesterday.

Today!

Let me get this straight.

I'm invited for the weekend for rest,

-relaxation and schmoozing?
-[Duchess] That's right.

-You must think I was crowned yesterday.
-No, I don't.

You're trying to get me over there

for another humiliating round
of Frivolous Pursuit.

-I am not.
-You're not?

-We're not playing a game.
-No game playing at all?

Not at all, I promise.

-Well, all right.
-Oh, good.

-As long as you're not fibbing.
-I'm not fibbing. Come over.

I'll throw a few things together
and grab the train.

-See you soon.
-Bye.

Your Majesty, may we have a word with you?

Sorry, I'm on my way out.

That's okay. We already knew
you were on your way out.

-How did you know that?
-We can't tell you.

It'd boggle your mind.

-Try me.
-We can't.

Trust us when we tell you
you'll be sorry if you see the duchess.

-How'd you know that's where I was going?
-We can't tell you.

It'd boggle your mind.

-Try me.
-We can't.

Trust us when we tell you
you'll be very sorry

if you allow yourself to get sucked
into a game of Frivolous Pursuit.

Oh, but the duchess assured me
there would be no--

How did you know that?

Don't you dare say you can't tell me
because it would boggle my mind.

Can we say we can't tell you

because your brain can't possibly
fathom another dimension

because it is light-years outside
the range of your everyday experience?

Oh, the both of you, get out of my way!

You're making us do something
we don't want to do.

-Did you bring the electrical tape?
-I always do.

There you have it.

Okay, here we go.

Go to it. Okay.

Here we go now.

Yup, okay.

Sorry to trap you
in your palace like this,

-but we can't let you go see the duchess.
-You'll thank us for this later.

The only thing I'll thank you for
is taking the tape off my door.

Oh, I'll just go out the back.

All right. The...

[both shouting]

Looks like we need to ask someone
for help on our time-travel mission.

Doesn't that mean we'll have
to split the queen's reward?

Yes, but a million wobucks
is easier to split than a banana.

-I say we ask the Tweedles to help us.
-Why?

You know the Tweedles.
They won't ask a lot of questions.

-What's this about?
-Don't leave anything out.

It's time we put our cards on the table.

I sure can't beat that hand. I fold.

Come on, you're stalling.

All right.
I know this is gonna be hard to believe,

but we are the Hatter
and the Hare from the future.

Twenty-four hours in the future,
to be exact.

And we've traveled back here
in a time machine

to stop the queen from doing something
she is going to regret tomorrow.

Regret so much that she said
she'd gladly have given

a million wobucks to somebody
if they had just stopped her.

A million wobucks. Did you hear that?

Yes, and also the part
about a time machine.

Sorry. My brother and I are not
so easily taken in by fantastic stories

-of time travel, right, Dum?
-Uh, right, Dee.

A time machine.
We'll believe it when we see it.

[hip-hop music playing]

♪ We're going to retain the right ♪

♪ To withhold belief
Till the thing is in sight ♪

♪ They may be wrong ♪

♪ Yeah, they just might ♪

♪ We're doubtful
Yet we're hopeful ♪

♪ We're just waiting for an eyeful ♪

♪ This time machine could be quite a hit ♪

♪ We'll believe it when we see it
We'll believe it when we see it ♪

♪ This time machine would be supreme ♪

♪ A supernatural machine ♪

-♪ With a shiny sheen like a limousine ♪
-♪ First of all, it must be seen ♪

♪ We're doubtful
We're hopeful ♪

♪ We're just waiting for an eyeful ♪

♪ This time machine could be quite a hit ♪

♪ We'll believe it when we see it
We'll believe it when we see it ♪

So you'll believe it when you see it, huh?

[both] Uh-huh.

[mischievous music playing]

There really is a time machine.

Looks like a bunch
of nuts, bolts, wire, and tape.

Well, actually, it's uh...

just a bunch
of nuts, bolts, wire, and tape.

But it's got a five-year warranty.
Those years can be in the future or past.

We'll give you a test drive
and prove it works.

No. This model comes in a two-door.

-Hare, do you have to slam the door?
-Oh. Sorry.

Now, I'll switch the day
from yesterday to tomorrow.

Hang on, it's back to the future.

[all shouting]

See? It works.

The control panel clearly says "tomorrow."

Of course it does.
You switched it to say tomorrow.

That's a very interesting theory.

We don't have time to discuss it.
We have to get back to the past.

[all shouting]

I guess we can count on you
to help us in our time-travel mission.

You have got to be kidding.

Boy! It's hard to convince people
that time travel is real.

I guess it just takes a special kind
of mind to believe the two of us.

How true that is.

[speaking indistinctly]

Can you imagine, Caterpillar? Dee and Dum

didn't believe us when we told them
we were brave time travelers

on a bold mission
from the Wonderland of tomorrow.

Can't imagine why.

Wait a minute.

Color me doubtful,
but I don't think you believe our story.

Well, may I completely honest with you?

Why, have you been
telling us stories up till now?

As a matter of fact, yes.

Now I think you should hear this one.

"Once there was a tiny turtle tot
named Tony.

As he was about
to pull into his shell for bed,

he saw something very unusual.

'It's a flying saucer,' he said.

He ran as fast as his tiny turtle legs
could carry him to tell his friends.

But none of his friends believed him.

'There's no such thing
as a flying saucer,' they said.

And Tony believed them.

The next night, even though
there was no such thing,

Tony saw another flying saucer land.

Once again, he ran off
to tell his forest friends.

And once again
his friends talked him into believing

that he hadn't really seen
what he thought he'd seen.

The next night,
the 'no such thing' landed again.

But this time, Tony decided
to leave his friends out of it.

There, in the clearing,
just as plain as the shell on his back,

was a flying saucer.

But Tony soon found out
that these were friendly spacemen

and they had brought with them
the cool video games.

So Tony learned a valuable lesson.

Never let somebody talk you out
of something you know to be true.

-Because if you do...
-[speaking indistinctly]

...you might miss something
that's out of this world."

Oh, so you're saying

that the classic conflict
of man versus animal

extends even
to extraterrestrials and turtles.

-Well, stories are open to interpretation.
-What I'm saying is,

if you believe strongly in something,

it shouldn't matter to you
whether other people believe it or not.

Right. There's an additional moral.
If nobody else believes you,

you don't have to share
the million wobucks.

[both laugh]

[clears throat]

I'm over here now.

Oh!

Sorry, Your Majesty.

It's just that it's a teensy,
eensy, peensy bit difficult

-to see you around all of this luggage.
-Are you suggesting I over-pack?

Oh, no, Your Majesty.

-I would never suggest that.
-[train approaching]

-I do all the packing.
-Ah, the train's here. Come, Rabbit.

-Your Majesty.
-Oh, stand back, you two.

I'm going to visit the duchess
and you're not gonna stop me.

Oh, of course not.

We just felt so terrible about
what happened this morning

that we stopped by
to help with the luggage.

[gasps] Well, thank you, Hatter.
It does get a bit much for one bunny,

even when the suitcases have
these handy antilock--

That's Her Majesty's luggage.

Yeah. I can tell. Nice monogram.

Rabbit, pick up that stuff!

I don't want the world
to see my royal bloomers.

[shouting]

[mischievous music playing]

Stop this. Stop this.

-You're gonna make miss my...
-[train horn blowing]

My train!

I missed my train.

Oh, harrumph! Now I can't spend
the weekend with the duchess. Oh!

Your Majesty, if you'd gone to see
the duchess, you'd have regretted it.

But maybe not today,
maybe not tomorrow but soon.

And for the rest of your life.

Oh, get out of my way, you chuckleheads!
Get out of my way.

Hurry. I'm anxious
to get back to the future

to collect our million wobucks.

-Hare, do you have to slam the door?
-Sorry.

I'll set the control panel
for exactly one minute

before the queen said to Alice that she'd
gladly have given a million wobucks

to somebody if they just stopped her
from seeing the duchess.

As soon as she says it,
we'll be right there to step up

-and collect our reward.
-Yeah. Hang on, Hare.

[both shouting]

-Hare, your door and please--
-I know.

I won't slam it.

Will you look at that?

We only put one day on this thing
and it already needs a tune-up.

I was angry with the Hatter and Hare
for making me miss my train.

But then I found out the duchess
was planning to ambush me

with an entire weekend
of Frivolous Pursuit.

[laughing] Well...

after I heard that, I was so happy
that they made me miss my train--

-Mr. Rabbit, look out!
-[shouts]

Hare! Hatter!

What are you doing in the queen's bushes?

Checking for root rot.

Oh, actually, Your Majesty,
I'm ashamed to admit it,

but we were eavesdropping.

It's not as bad as it sounds.
We were waiting for you to say something

we've already heard you say.

I beg your pardon.
Her Majesty never repeats anything.

Right. I never repeat anything.

But I do want to say thanks to both of you

for making me miss my train.

Duchy was trying to rope me
into another humiliating round

-of Frivolous Pursuit.
-How did you know the duchess

was setting a trap for the queen?

Oh, let's just say we were
in the right place at the right time.

Speaking of time, isn't it about time
for you to say something?

Like what?

Like you'd gladly have given
a million wobucks to somebody

if they just stopped you
from going to see the duchess.

Then humiliating yourself
in a game of Frivolous Pursuit.

Why would I say that?
I didn't see the duchess.

No, because you stopped
Her Majesty at the train station.

Oh, no. I just realized something.

Because we stopped her from going,
we stopped her from being humiliated.

Since she wasn't humiliated,
she has nothing to regret.

Since she has nothing to regret--

She has no reason to offer
a million wobucks

to the people who kept her
from regretting it.

It serves us right.

If man were meant to travel through time,

he'd be able to get frequent flyer miles
for trips to the fourth dimension.

I bet you two are happy.
You saved the queen in the nick of time.

[upbeat music playing]

♪ She was moments from disaster
As close as she could be ♪

♪ It would've been so painful
A royal calamity ♪

♪ In the nick of time
Without a moment to spare ♪

♪ I was rescued by two heroes
The Hatter and the Hare ♪

♪ In the nick of time
Before today became tomorrow ♪

♪ They did what friends would do
To spare me any sorrow ♪

♪ Tomorrow never happened
The future's still at hand ♪

♪ Filled with pride and promise
For all of Wonderland ♪

♪ In the nick of time
Without a moment to spare ♪

♪ I was rescued by two heroes
The Hatter and the Hare ♪

♪ In the nick of time
Before today became tomorrow ♪

♪ They did what friends would do
To spare me any sorrow ♪

♪ In the nick of time ♪

[Dinah meows]

Sorry, Dinah, I can't play with you.

I have to go back and practice the piano.

I've decided my piece could use
a little-- A lot more work.

Fortunately, I think I'm admitting that
just in the nick of time.

I don't want to be standing here tomorrow
after bombing out at the recital,

wishing I could go back in time
and practice.

[playing "Für Elise"]

[theme music playing]

♪ That's all for now
But we'll see you again ♪

♪ Come back real soon
Now that we're all friends ♪

♪ Where every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme and a dance or two ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventures in Wonderland ♪