03x48 - The Silly Six

[bunniefuu]

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

BUGS: Hold still, Esther.

I just gotta get some
new shoes on ya.

(NEIGHS, NICKERS)

- What do ya think?
-(NEIGHS APPROVINGLY)

Good. 'Cause we
gotta make sure

we're all set
for our special
assignment today.

As Marshal of
this here territory,

we need to safely escort
a special passenger
to Tombstone Falls.

Somebody named
Archibald St. Reginald,
I think.

MOLE RAT: Actually, it's
Reginald St. Archibald.

Naked mole rat,
raconteur and connoisseur
of all things toast.

Did you say "toast"?

That's right.
I'm a toaster oven salesman.

I've got a few hundred
in that there cart.

- And you're a naked mole rat?
- Yeah.

But I dress business casual.
Anyhoo, can I interest you
in a fine toaster oven?

Nah, I'm good.
Uh, we should get going.

Come on, Esther.
Time to get a move on.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
You get off there.

You drove last time.

SAM: Ooh,
look at that stagecoach.

It's just screaming,
"Rob me, Yosemite Sam."

(LAUGHTER)

What are you doing?

We're pretending
to be tumbleweed.

Whee!

Oh, knock it off
and get on your horses.

We gotta rob that stagecoach.

A coach with a stage on it?

We was on a stage once.

"Romeo, Oh, Romeo,

"wherefore art thou Romeo?"

"I am under your balcony,

"waiting to give you
a big ol' smooch."

Oh, cut it out, you nitwits.

There ain't no plays
on a stagecoach.

Now, mount up
and let's get 'em.

Oh, no! Those guys
are trying to rob us.

Are you sure?
They could be chasing us

because they heard about
the low, low prices
on these toaster ovens.

Hey, Curt, look.

There's a pond up yonder.

I wanna go skinny dipping.

(BOTH LAUGHING AND CHEERING)

Ugh! Not again!

Ooh, I gotta do
everything myself.

All right, rabbit.
Reach for the sky.

How about reaching
for an industrial-strength
toaster oven?

With its quick meals,
it's perfect for
the criminal on the go.

Reg, stay inside the coach.
It's my job to keep you safe.

Wait! What's the warranty
on this thing?

Whoa!

(GROANING)

-(MECHANICAL THUD)
- What the...

(CACKLES) It's me,
evil inventor Dr. Elmer Fudd.

Behold my latest invention,

my special
stagecoach-snatching
hot air balloon.

Not on my watch.

Stay inside, Reg!

(EXCLAIMING)

Instead of grabbing
the stagecoach,

how about grabbing
a super-duper deluxe
toaster oven.

It's great
for English muffins,
eggs Benedict,

and drying a wet pair
of long underwear.

Long underwear?

Ugh! Gross.

Darn it. I always
lose 'em with that
"long underwear" line.

Sit back, Reg,
and leave this to me.

- Now I've got you.
-(CLANG)

-(GROWLING)
- Oh, no!

-(ELMER YELLING)
-(BOTH GROANING)

I guess Dr. Fudd just
couldn't "bear" to
bring us in. (CHUCKLES)

How about,
he came to a "grizzly" end?

Wait, wait. I got it.
It looks like he
threw in the "growl".

-(SNAPPING)
- Yikes!

(SNAPPING)

It is I, the mad trapper,
Blacque Jacque Shellacque.

And I have set
many, many, many

giant mad traps
to rob the stagecoach.

You know what's a trap,
a regular toaster.

Because you're trapped
into making only toast.

A toaster oven
gives you an infinite number
of food options.

You can make
cranberry muffins,
nut-crusted rainbow trout,

Moroccan pork kebabs...

You can even toast
a bagel with the cream
cheese already on it.

-(SNAPPING)
-(BOTH EXCLAIM)

(ESTHER STRAINING)

(GROANING)

Oh, no, we're stuck.

You're never stuck
with a toaster oven.

The options are limitless.

Will you stop talking
about toaster ovens?

What? You can't ask me to stop
talking about toaster ovens.

That's like asking a fish
not to swim,
or a cow not to moo,

or a teacher to stop assigning
unnecessary homework.

- It's just not right.
-(GRUNTING) Got it.

All right, now let's
get out of this place.

Giddyap, Mary. Or Penny.

I don't know
this horse's name. Hiyah!

Hey, wait for me.

Okay, Reg, I finally got you
to Tombstone Falls
safe and sound.

Yeah. This is the place.
You know it used to be called
Dirt Nap Falls.

Ironically, they had
zero fatalities.

So what are you gonna do
in Tombstone Falls,
Mr. Archibald?

I'm gonna blow it up
with some dynamite,

so I can build
a giant toaster oven factory.

Well, that's great.
Good luck with th...
Wait, what?

(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

Hold on. Let me flip over
my ominous music rec.

That's right.
I'm gonna blow up...

(POLKA MUSIC PLAYING)

Well, would you look at that?
The B side was polka music.

It's pretty catchy,
but not what
I'm going for right now.

Ah, well, I guess
I'll do it in acapella.

(CLEARS THROAT)
That's right.

I'm gonna blow up
Tombstone Falls.

Pum-Pum-Pa...

- You get the idea.
-(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS)

BUGS: You can't just blow up
Tombstone Falls

and build
a toaster oven factory.

Hey, what's that over there?

Ha! I made you look.
(LAUGHING)

I can't believe
you fell for that.

That never works!
(CONTINUES LAUGHING)

- Oh, boy!
- All right, I'm taking you in.

- No, you're not.
- And why not?

'Cause while you
were distracted,

I tied your leg to the horse.

Betsy. Callie. Whatever.

- Hiyah!
-(NEIGHING)

Whoa, Esther! Whoa! Whoa!

I said, "Whoa!" (GROANS)

What part of "whoa"
don't you understand?

(NICKERS)

-(ALL GROWLING)
- Uh-oh.

(ALL GRUNTING)

We have captured our nemesis
Marshal Bugs Bunny.

Yeah, and we caught
our rival too.

Those words
mean the same thing.

That's funny.
They sound different.

And now, fellas, I know
we've had our differences.

Differences? You blew me up
with dynamite.

Why, you shoved
a bee hive in my g*n,
and I got stung all over.

You tricked me into putting on
tiny underpants that
squeeze and chafe me so.

But you got bigger problems,

because there's
a crazy toaster salesman

who's gonna blow up
Tombstone Falls.

(ALL GASP)

What a dastardly,
fiendish, evil plan.

I really wish
I had thought of it.

Yeah. I'm jealous.

But wait. He can't destroy
Tombstone Falls.

It has all the best
banks to rob.

And if Tombstone Falls
is blown up,

we gotta done do
all our robbing
on the other side of the hill.

Eh, not to worry, boys.
I got a plan.

Gather around.
(WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY)

♪ I'm gonna blow up
Tombstone Falls pronto

♪ Sit on a mat
And press this button

♪ Then start making
Toaster ovens

♪ I'm gonna blow up
Tombstone Falls pronto ♪

Time to turn Tombstone Falls
into a Boom Town. (CHUCKLES)

You see what I did there?

Hello. (CLEARS THROAT)

(IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE)
Hello.

I am just a lonely
pioneer lady

passing through town,
and I need your help.

- You're a lady?
- Do you have
a problem with that?

No, no, it's just,
you have a mustache.

Aah! This is just
the latest style.

All the ladies
are growing this now.

Well, I can't help you
right now, mustache lady.

- I've got a town to blow up.
- It is too bad.

Because you see,
I have all this bread

and nothing to toast it with.

Did you say
you need bread toasted?

Today's your lucky day.

Now, tell me, what's it
gonna take to get your bread

into one of these
spectacular toaster ovens?

Quick, let's grab the dynamite
and load it into the wagon.

Now I can see
you're a woman of taste.

I couldn't see you with
anything less than
a Bun Burner 5000.

(GRUNTS)
Look at all this dynamite.

Once we save Tombstone Falls,

I'm gonna come back here
and use it to rob the bank.

No way. I'm gonna use it
to rob the jewelry store.

- Bank!
- Jewelry store!

- Bank!
- Guys!

Before you rob the town,
you've gotta save the town.

Hey! I found an old piece
of bacon in my pocket.

Let's heat it up
with this here candle,
and have it for a snack.

If you want it crispy,
you put it
on the second rack.

But if you want it
extra crispy,

you also put it
on the second rack.

(expl*si*n)

Let me guess, wigs are
the new trend now too?

Au revoir.

You're also bilingual?

- He's on to us. Run!
-(ELMER GRUNTS)

Come back here
with my dynamite!

We did it, guys.
We got the dynamite.

Now we can rob that bank.

- Jewelry store!
- Bank!

Jewelry store!

(ALL SCREAM)

(ALL GRUNTING)

Did I just get hit
by a piece of toast?

That's right. It's toast,
and so are you.

(ALL GRUNTING)

- Can we get something to eat?
-(g*nshots)

-(BOTH GRUNT)
-(MUNCHING)

Nobody can resist
my impeccably-cooked toast.

Now, you have any last words?

Yeah. I think
your toast is mediocre.

What did you say?

'Cause I'm having
a little trouble hearing.

I said your toast
is mediocre!

No one insults my toast!

(GRUNTING)

(GULPS, SMACKS LIPS)

Average.

Then how about
we turn up the heat
with a ghost pepper pizza.

No! My toaster ovens are gone!

(CRYING)
My beautiful toaster ovens.

It looks like your toast
just got burned.

Well, guys, that was fun.

We should team up
and catch bad guys more often.

Yeah. We should.

Yeah. Count me in.

Totally.

You're all going off
to rob the bank, aren't ya?

ELMER: Jewelry store!

Before you go,
would you like a snack

from this toaster oven
I just made?

I'm good. (WHISTLES)

All right, gentlemen.
Get ready to be
brought to justice.

Let's get 'em, Esther.

(NEIGHING)

Oh! Esther!

Mmm!

That's all folks.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)