04x03 - Award to the Wise/Cave Chatter

[bunniefuu]

Attention, campers,

Attention, campers--

It's time for "camp lazlo!"

♪ There were two scouts

Who made a friend

And lazlo was his name-o

L-a-z-l-o ♪

♪ L-a-z-l-o

♪ L-a-z-l-o

♪ And lazlo was his name-o

♪ And then that trio

Went to camp

And turned it upside down-o

L-a-z-l-o ♪

♪ L-a-z-l-o

♪ L-a-z-l-o

And lazlo was his name-o ♪





[Fart sound]

Oh, lazlo, that smells

Terrible!

Really?

I kind of like the smell of wood

Glue.

[Fart sounds]

What are you doing with all

That smelly wood glue anyway?

I'm entering the prickly

Pines make a sculpture out of

Odd little twigs contest.

Oh!

Hey!

Let's play tetherball!

Tetherball?

Finishing this sculpture is way

Too important for me to take a

Break and play tetherball.

Ok, lazlo.

Adios.

Ha ha!

Spanish.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Go swimming?

Sorry, guys.

I'm still working on my

Sculpture.

Ok.

Suit yourself.

Tennis?

Pin the tail on the llama?

No, thanks.

Wow!

I'm finally finished!

A 1/8 square model of

Scoutmaster lumpus' cabin made

Out of odd little twigs.

I'm so excited!

Jeez!

Winners of the contest won't be

Announced for another 6 weeks.

I can't wait that long to find

Out what others think of it.

If only there was some way I

Could jump to--

And now, before I finish this

Morning's announcements, I think

Scoutmaster lumpus has something

Special to present.

[Cheering]

Scoutmaster lumpus?

[Snoring]

Well, it's a good thing I

Have a copy of his speech.

Ahem.

As scoutmaster, it pleases me to

Announce that one of our campers

Placed seventh in the prickly

Pines odd little twigs sculpture

Contest.

Lazlo, didn't you enter that

Contest?

Did i?

Therefore, it gives me great

Pleasure to award this handsome

Certificate to insert name

Here--er, I mean, lazlo!

Yay!

Um...

What's a certificate?

It's like an award.

Like an award?

Hey, guys, I won something

That's like an award!

[Cheering]

[Cheering]

[Toilet flushes]

[Cheering]

[Cheering]

[Cheering]

So, lazlo,

How did it feel to win your

Certificate?

Well, they say it's a

Pleasure just to be nominated,

But don't you believe them.

Winning feels so much better.

Ok.

I think that's it.

Gee.

I wish someone would give me an

Award.

Yeah.

Me, too.

Come on.

Let's go feel bad about

Ourselves.

Gosh.

[Sobbing]

What's wrong, samson?

Every since lazlo won that

Award, I have felt really bad

About myself...

Like I'm some sort of loser!

Me, too.

Me 3.

Me 4.

Me 6.

[Sobbing]

I mean 5.

[Sobbing]

This is terrible.

I've been so caught up in the

Hoopla, I haven't realized how

Sad everyone is.

I wish there was some way I

Could give everyone an award.

Yucca!

Here, samson!

I made this for you last night.

Cleanest uniform award?

Wow!

It's got my name and everything!

Thanks, lazlo.

[Whistling]

Here you go, chip.

Here you go, skip.

Best elbows.

Wow!

Most improved sitter.

Here you go, sheldon.

Best performance by an

Incidental character.

Wow!

Thanks, lazlo!

Here you go.

Here you go.

Here you go.

Here you go.

[Clamoring]

I'm somebody!

Whoo-wee!

I feel so good about myself!

[Snoring]

Who said that?

Oh, slinkman, what is wrong with

The children?

Lazlo made awards for

Everyone, sir.

Oh, wake me up when I get

Mine, will you, slinkman?

Best camper award.

Favorite camper award.

I feel so good about myself.

Me, too!

Would you hold mine until I go

To the bathroom.

Hey!

How did you get two?

No, it's not!

I was just--

Save it for the judge!

You two keep an eye on this one.

I'm gonna go tell lazlo!

You make me sick.

Here.

Hold this for a second.

Now--

Hey!

Now skip has two awards!

I'm chip.

Why does he get two?!

What do you think, raj?

I think I should ask nurse

Leslie for edward's anger bag.

Wait, raj.

I think we can solve this

Problem without edward's anger

Bag.

Really?

And so, edward,

It gives me great pleasure to

Present you with this second

Award.

Angriest camper award.

Thanks, lazlo!

See that, losers!

I got two!

I want two!

Me, too!

Jeez, fellas.

I'm starting to have a hard time

Thinking of new awards.

And I've run out of paper.

Oh!

Oh!

I guess I could use toilet

Tissue.

And so, it is with great

Pleasure that I present you

With this second award.

All right.

That's everyone.

I'm going to bed.

I want one on toilet paper.

Hey!

Now edward has 3!

Ok.

Everybody has exactly 67 awards

Each.

Any questions?

Can I have one more?

Me, too!

[Clamoring]

Wait!

These awards are making everyone

Feel miserable instead of

Special.

I've got to stop manipulating

Your emotions like this--

At least until I learn to do it

Right.

I need to think.

While he's thinking, I'll

Just go feel miserable.

Me, too.

Yeah.

One for safety,

One for freshness,

One last piece for comfort.

Oh.

No.

No!

[Toilet flushes]

Hey, samson.

I am one lucky camper.

That was the last toilet paper

In all of camp kidney.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

[Whistling]

No!

[Snoring]

[Honking]

[Groaning]

Oh!

Sorry, guys.

But I'm gonna have to use one of

You.

Hmm.

Most socially-awkward?

Too precious.

Lowest self-esteem.

No.

Too proud of that one.

Most trustworthy.

This one means more to me than

All the others.

Huh?

[Toilets flush]

We took a page from your

Book.

Several pages.

[Laughing]

So, now we're even.

Dave and I are even.

But ping-pong still has all of

His awards.

No!

Wait!

[Toilet flushing]

[Toilets flushing]

[Toilets flushing]

[Toilets flushing]

♪ From plate to potty

With pronto

Dat-dat-da da da dah

Dum dee doo ♪

I love my pronto cereal.

I don't know why I'm serving

This to the kids.

They never eat it.

Hmm.

[Toilets flushing]

[Groaning]

You guys!

You guys, I got it!

There he is!

It's all lazlo's fault!

Not only have we flushed all of

Our awards, but I'm chaffing

Like crazy!

But, edward, I know why this

Happened.

This was all for us to figure

Out that awards don't make you

Happy.

True happiness comes from

Knowing that you're special just

The way you are--

Not for the silly piece of

Paper.

Ok, lazlo.

Then give us your award.

How's that?

Yeah, come on!

Flush it!

[Chanting "flush it"]

Uh.

Sure.

Here.

Ha ha.

Don't seem to be able to hand it

Over.

Now that I've looked at it,

It is kind of nice.

So pretty.

What am I doing!

I can't give it up!

I like it too much!

Help!

Ah-choo!

Anybody got a tissue?

You know what?

I can give this up

Because there's no greater award

Than friendship.

Thanks, lazlo.

Thank you, samson.

Hey, hey, hey!

Where's my award, huh?

I want my award, and I want it

Now!

Give it to me!

But that's the last one,

And it's--

I won!

I won!

I want to thank all the little

People who made this possible.

Ha.

Yes.

Ah.

Me likey.

[Kissy sounds]

Suddenly, awards aren't

Important to me any more.

Me neither.

He can have them.

I'd like to apologize for my

Earlier behavior.

Will you accept a mint as a

Condolence?

We sure would!





Thanks, samson!

H-hey.

W-what happened?!

[Shivering]

Icy breath freshener!







Not refreshing!

[Reveille plays]

Attention, campers,

Attention, campers--

It's time for "camp lazlo!"

♪ There were two scouts

Who made a friend

And lazlo was his name-o

L-a-z-l-o ♪

♪ L-a-z-l-o

♪ L-a-z-l-o

♪ And lazlo was his name-o

♪ And then that trio

Went to camp

And turned it upside down-o

L-a-z-l-o ♪

♪ L-a-z-l-o

♪ L-a-z-l-o

And lazlo was his name-o ♪

Did you hear?

Dave and ping-pong aren't

Talking again.

Dave insulted ping-pong's adam's

Apple.

Ha ha ha ha ha.

You know who I hate this week?

The lemmings.

I mean, what's their deal?

I don't even think they're

Brothers, larry, louie, leonard,

And liniment.

What's with the letter "l"?

Lame is what it is.

What's that?

[Snickering]

Oh, you're horrible!

Ha ha!

Scoutmaster lumpus doesn't wear

False antlers.

You're crazy.

But I like you because you're

The only one who lets me get a

Word in edgewise.

Thanks again for listening,

Friend.

See you tomorrow!

Same time, same place.

[Humming]

This way, guys!

Lazlo...

Why did you bring us to this

Grungy, dungy cave.

I want to show you guys a new

Game!

I call this game...

Bat in your hair!

Aagh!

Oh, no!

Clam, don't let the nasty old

Bat in your hair!

Ha ha!

Blah, blah, blah, blah!

Ha ha ha!

Oof!

Wow!

Lazlo, look out!

It's ok, raj.

He's frozen.

He looks like a prehistoric

Saber tooth cave marmot.

Why is he here?

Look!

Look at head!

[Gasps]

That looks like a bean scout

Cap.

That is a bean scout cap!

Do you realize that he could be

The first bean scout!

Oh, we gotta thaw him out!

We gotta!

We gotta!

Think of how great it will be to

Have our very own cave bean!

He could teach us about

Dinosaurs and rocks!

I love rocks!

Perfect.

Almost there.

Just a few more yards.

Hey!

Hold it!

Stop right there!

Where'd you get that?!

Don't worry, samson.

You don't understand!

It's--

I understand.

No, you don't see.

He's--

I see.

He's a cave bean.

Yes, but he's--

Shh!

Yeah.

I'd love to stay chat,

But we've got a cave bean to

Thaw out.

Mer.

The only reason the cave bean

Listened to me in the first

Place was because he was frozen.

If lazlo thaws him out, I won't

Have anyone to talk to.

Who are you talking to?

Nobody!

Ok, jellies,

Here's the question.

Ice.

How does it melt?

Um...

It's got something to do with

Computers, I think.

Market research.

What?

Cabbages?

Magic?

You'll never melt that ice!

Not with this around!

What's that?

Oops.

The cold shoulder!

Whacha gonna do now?

You need help!

You should talk to somebody!

Ok!

I'll talk to you!

I--

Not now!

I'm busy!

Ok, where were we?

Nerts!

Let them have my cave bean.

I can talk to a rock.

How about this weather, rock?

And--

Ok.

Good-bye.

Phew!

How about this heat, raj?

Hot enough to fry an egg.

How about you, clam?

How you holding up?

Uh...

Surviving.

It's not working, lazlo.

We didn't fool the ice into

Thinking it's hot in here.

What should we do now?

Maybe we should try using our

Heat vision.

We have heat vision?

I don't know, raj.

But I do know that we'll never

Know if we don't try.

How do we do it?

Just concentrate on the ice

With your eyes.

Ohm...

[Growling]

[Groaning]

I don't feel so good.

Don't say "eye."

Ay-ay-ay!

I guess we're not so hot at

Melting ice.

Well, I know I'm hot.

Hot!

Clam, what are you doing?!

It's working!

The ice is melting.

Ooh!

He's such a brute.

Let's call him beastly

Bumblepuss.

Hey, he's coming to.

[Groaning]

Welcome to the future!

[Groaning]

Hi!

My name is lazlo.

This is clam!

Hi!

And raj!

Greetings!

Uh, lazlo,

I think his brain is still

Refrigerated.

It's slushy.

Oh, he's probably just

Jet-lagged from that long trip

Through time.

What he needs is some fresh air

And a tour of camp.

Defrost.

[Giggling]

Well, bumblepuss,

This is camp kidney.

As you can see, camp has evolved

Into a futuristic, advanced

Modern facility.

Let's start the tour off in the

Mess hall.

Oh, and it's lunchtime!

You can meet all your fellow

Bean scouts at once!

Ok, let's not get too excited.

Let's tidy you up.

Comb your eyebrows.

Be happy.

Smile.

Perfect!

[Clamoring]

May I have your attention,

Please?!

Raj, clam, and I have made an

Important discovery.

We've uncovered and thawed out

The very first bean scout in

History.

Let's give a big bean welcome to

Beastly bumblepuss!

[Crash]

And here he is!

[Gasps]

We brought him here so he can

Share his secrets about

Prehistoric camp kidney.

Any questions?

Were there dinosaurs where

You came from?

[Burps]

Does that answer your

Question?

Cool!

Wait a minute!

How do we know he's really a

Bean scout?

Just look at him.

All beans evolved from him.

[Groans]

He's just a blithering idiot!

[Groans]

I guess he is a bean scout.

Can I have my picture taken

With him?

That's a great idea!

Oh, he'll love that!

Say cheese!

Who's got a camera?

Cheese!

[Snarling]

Stop!

The flashes are scaring him!

Beastly bumblepuss!

Wait!

Slinkman!

Where is that lazy slug?

I'm ready for my massage!

Finally.

Well, come on, come on.

My shoulders aren't gonna

Massage themselves.

Start with the shoulders.

Ooh.

Scented oils.

Nice.

Aagh!

Aagh!

Not so hard, slinkman.

[Snarls]

[Screaming]

All right, scoutmaster

Lumpus, ready for your--

Oh, my!

You're tense.

Your back--it's all in knots.

I can't have anything, can i?

You meet a frozen cave man, you

Become friends, than, bam!

Somebody wants to thaw him out!

He was my...

[Sobs]

Friend.

He listened!

[Sobbing]

Now there's no one to listen!

No one in the whole wide world.

There's just me

Listening to me.

What do they put in this water?

Cave bean?

Is it really you?

[Snarls]

Oh, now that you're thawed

Out, you probably wouldn't even

Listen to me, would you?

Huh?

Would you?

Huh?

[Gasps]

You're listening to me.

I'm actually getting a word in

Edgewise!

Wow!

This is great!

Where do I begin?

Well, yesterday I saw dave, and

I said, "hey, what's the big

Whoop?"

And he said, "duh."

And I said, "duh."

And he said, "whatever."

And I said "whoop-de-diddly do."

And he said, "nah-uh!"

And I said, "oho."

And--and--and he said, "nah-uh."

And I said, "well, I already

Said whatever.

So, you can't say nah-uh."

And he said, "uh-huh."

And edward's got this pet

Piranha, and it's like ugly!

It turns, like, all different

Colors.

And I swear I think I'm allergic

To it because it made me just,

You know, just go crazy.

And I said...

[Snarling]

Hey, watch it, buddy!

You almost hit me!

Now, where was i?

Stop that!

I'm about to get to the best

Part!

Don't you want to hear the rest?

[Roars]

I'll take that as a no.

[Screaming]

I hope bumblepuss is ok.

Lazlo!

[Panting]

You see what happens when you

Guys don't listen to me?

We always listen.

[Muffled]

The frozen cave bean was my

Friend, but only if he was

Frozen.

Thawed out, he's nobody's

Friend.

[Snarling]

You know, you really should

Wash your hands.

[Snarling]

Aagh!

So, he's samson's friend?

Only when frozen.

Chilly chum.

Aagh!

[Snarling]

Uh-oh!

[Screaming]

He's destroying the camp!

We've got to refreeze him for

Samson!

But how?!

I got it!

The coldest showers in the world

Are right here at camp kidney.

Ooh!

I hate the showers!

That's great!

Goosebumps!

Samson, run to the showers!

I already took one this

Morning, but ok!

[Faucet squeaks]

[Screaming]

Thanks, guys.

Anyway, so I was saying how

About that milt?

Did you see those shorts he was

Wearing?

I am sorry, he is not a petite.

I'm telling you, you gotta be

Like at least a husky.

I'd like to apologize for my

Earlier behavior.

Will you accept a mint as a

Condolence?

We sure would!

Thanks, samson!

H-hey.

W-what happened?!

[Shivering]

Icy breath freshener!

Not refreshing!