03x08 - Lucy's Wedding Party

[bunniefuu]

[announcer] Here's Lucy,

starring Lucille Ball.

Co-Starring, Gale Gordon,

Lucie Arnaz, and Desi Arnaz, Jr.

You can stop tiptoeing
through the tulips.

Harry, you must have eyes
in the back of your head.

I don't have to see. I can
feel disaster approaching.

Today of all days,
you had to be late.

Well, you've got to type
up all of these letters.

- All of these?
- Even if you have to work on Sunday.

Sunday! Who works on Sundays?

You do, because I want those
finished by the time I get back.

Back from where?

I am going to my college reunion

where I was voted
the most popular,

most congenial, most
lovable classmate

for four consecutive years.

Did you graduate or
were you pardoned?

Lucille, are you insinuating that
I have lost some of my charm?

Well, to be honest with you, I'm
a little worried about that reunion

because deep down inside,

a little voice makes
me doubt that I'm still the

same lovable old Mr. Nice
Guy that I used to be.

What does that little voice
deep down inside of you say?

It says, [blows raspberry]

Oh.

But I'll just have to
be very, very careful.

I'll have to be extra sweet,
extra nice, extra charming,

loving considerate,
generous, kind.

Get out of my way and get
out of this office in 10 seconds.

Lucille has no time for
anything but work, work, work!

Woof, woof, woof.

Yeah, well you're
barking at the wrong one.

I'm the one who's working
like a dog around here.

I have to type all of
these letters over the

weekend, I won't have
a minute to myself.

Oh that's too bad.

Well, in that case, you won't
have time to go to the wedding.

I'm not going to
have time... wedding!

Oh, Mary Jane! Where
did you meet him?

How did it happen?
Oh, it's unbelievable!

- Oh, I'm not the one
that's getting married.
- Oh!

And what do you
mean it's unbelievable?

Oh well I didn't mean... it's just that
when I hear the word wedding I get excited.

Well, if it isn't
you, who is it?

- It's Cleo Menikos, you know, the little Greek
girl who works in the office next to me?
- Oh Cleo!

Yeah, she's getting married tomorrow and
they're going on their honeymoon Sunday.

Oh, and I won't be able to go.

Oh, I think they can manage
without you on their honeymoon.

I meant to the wedding.

Lucy, you've got so many
friends in this building, all you

have to do is ask each girl
to type a few letters for you.

Hey, that's a great idea!
Will you type some for me?

No.

- Well, only because I'm
so busy with the wedding.
- Oh.

- But I'm sure if you ask the
other girls, they'd be glad to help.
- Alright, I'll ask them.

Hey is there anything I can
do to help with the wedding?

- Well, we need an
authentic Greek orchestra.
- Oh!

Do you know any Greeks?

Yeah. I know one.

Spiro.

Spiro Agnew?

No, Spiro Shapiro.

He owns a Greek
restaurant down in Chinatown.

Lucy, here are the
letters, all typed.

Oh, thank you!

And you know what?

The girls made mistakes on purpose so
horrible Harry will think you typed them.

Well, it was very nice
of them to help me out.

- Lucy, how come you need
these letters— - Fight, fight, fight.

Fight with all your might.

Fight, fight, fight.
March around and fight!

Show them who
the tigers really are.

Rrrrr!!

What does the BS stand for?

Bullwinkle State.

Well, girls how do I look?

You tell him, Mary Jane.
You don't work here.

What did you say?

I said here I was expecting my boss
and in walked handsome Joe Namath.

Oh well, I wouldn't say that.

Neither would I.

One thing I have to say
about her, she certainly

brightens up a room
when she leaves it.

- Now, look, Lucille, why I'm away, I want
you to pick up my mail and the newspapers.
- Okay, dear.

Oh yes. And you might
put the milk bottles inside.

Go down in the evening,
turn on porch light and then

drop by in the morning and
turn them off again, huh?

Well, why don't you just
have me sleep there?

That's an excellent suggestion.
I want the house to look lived in.

There you are. Feel free
to use the maid's room.

The maid's room!

Oh, and since you'll be
staying there anyway, why don't

you dust up a little bit,
vacuum, clean up just a bit.

- Now, wait a minute Harry!
- I don't have a minute.

I have to go home and
pack and then I'm meeting

a classmate at the
airport, old Freddy Fox.

[singing] Oh, I'm off to Bullwinkle
state. We're going to celebrate.

Carter's Unique Employment
Agency, sl*ve labor division.

Oh, Mr. Fox he just left.

Yes, he said he'd meet
you at the airport, sir.

Yes, sir.

Right in here, dear.
Right in here, honey.

Oh, now why is the beautiful bride
crying, because she's so happy?

No, the beautiful bride is crying
because the wedding is off.

The wedding is off!

They lost the reception hall
because of the mix up in reservation.

Oh, you poor kid.

And we've called every reception
hall in town and they're booked solid.

And the bride is expecting.

The bride is expecting?

- Yes, she's expecting
her uncles and aunts.
- Oh.

They've all been invited.

Some of them have
flown over from Athens.

Oh, Cleo, now stop crying.

You have plenty of time
for that after you get married.

No, no. I mean I'm sorry.

Well, I mean we're just trying to
think. We just want to help you out.

Yes, honey, we're just trying to
think. We'll think of something.

Lucy, where are we going
to hold this reception?

How do I know?
Where, where, where?

Oh, Cleo baby!

I've got the perfect place.

My boss, the popular,
congenial, and lovable Mr. Carter

had just donated his beautiful
home for your reception.

- Horrible Harry?
- That's right.

He wants his house to look
lived in. It will looked lived in.

Lucy, he'll k*ll you.

Well, it won't
be the first time.

Cleo, his house is yours.

Oh, how can I ever repay you?

Well, just throw me
your bridal bouquet.

I think maybe I'll need
some flowers in the hospital.

Everybody enjoy! Enjoy yourself.

We celebrate in honor of my little
granddaughter Cleo and Joe Andropopolis.

We do Karsilama.

- You're going to do what?
- Karsilama.

- This is traditional Greek wedding dance.
- Oh wonderful.

- You watch, they show you.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Mussiki.

- Redhead lady, you like Greek dance?
- Oh, I just thought it was wonderful.

- Good. You ain't seen something yet.
- No?

- Now I dance - - Oh, great!

With you.

I don't know any Greek dances.

- No, but you got best Greek dancing teacher
in the whole world. Me.
- Oh no, no way.

- Come redhead lady.
- Oh no, really!

I'll show you.

Okay.

Opa!

- Glorious. Magnificent.
- Oh no!

In fact, not bad, for
skinny redhead lady.

Oh, thank you thank you!

- Lucy!
- What?

Lucy you were so wonderful.

You were the best girl in it.

Oh, thank you.

- Grandpa Kasos, this is my
friend Mary Jane Lewis.
- Oh, hello.

- How do you do?
- Oh!

Glad you meet me.

Oh, well, I'm glad
you meet me too.

Any friend of redhead
lady friend of mine.

Well, sir, when does
the ceremony start?

- As soon Father Lambros arrives,
we all go to church.
- Oh, thank you.

Father Lambros has married
three generations Kasos.

Thanks to him, I
have 36 grandchildren.

Oh really? Where is he? What
do you think is keeping him?

I don't' know. If he was not always
late, I would have 46 grandchildren.

That's Greek joke.

- Get it?
- Oh yeah, I got it.

Oh.

Say, redhead lady,
I hear you widow.

Oh, widow. Oh yes, yes.

Not that I haven't had offers.

- Oh, I'm sure you have.
- Yeah.

You're good looking,
skinny but good looking.

Well, thank you.

I'm just waiting for the
right man to come along.

I am glad you waited.

You are?

I may not look it. I am only 77.

- Only 77?
- What is matter, redhead lady?

- You think I'm too young for you?
- Oh no, of course not.

Then we get married.

Now, that's quite
an offer but I don't...

- Oh, redhead lady play hard to get.
- No, it's not that.

All right, champagne
everybody. Champagne.

Ah! Drink.

We talk later.

Hello.

What? I can't hear you?

Who's calling?

Mr. Carter? Oh hello, Harry!

Where are you,
still at the airport?

You're delayed? You're
coming back here for a snack?

But listen Harry... hello?

Harry? Harry?

- Lucy, you look like
you've had bad news.
- Oh, the worst.

- What?
- Harry's plane has been delayed.

He's on his way back
here with his friend.

He should be here
in a few minutes.

- He's coming here?
- Yeah.

- Oh, he wouldn't be mean enough
to send everybody away, would he?
- Oh no.

He wouldn't send them
away, he'd throw them out!

We got to think of something.

- Yeah, but what?
- Anything.

- Oh, I got it.
- Good idea!

You haven't heard it yet.

Well, I'm giving you
a vote of confidence.

All right, we're going to play a
game where everybody hides.

That's your idea?

Yes. I want everyone to
hide until I can get rid of Harry.

- I take back my vote of confidence.
- Oh, Marry Jane.

Listen, Ladies and gentlemen,
may I have your attention?

I have an announcement to make.

Quiet everybody!
Listen announcement.

Go ahead redhead lady. You
make announcement we get married.

Oh no, not that.

We are going to play a
game where everybody hides.

That doesn't
sound like much fun.

Oh, well, the point of the game is
the men have to hide with the women.

That sounds like fun.

All right. All right.

Now, listen, there are
plenty of closets and all

kinds of rooms around
here for you to hide in.

So, men get ready, take
your woman and hide!

Not me. Not me, grandpa.

Grandpa!

Are you sure you're 77?

Oh no! Gosh.

Come on in Fred, come in.

Oh, hello.

You sly old dog, what
a beautiful maid you

have and good help is
hard to find these days.

She's not the maid
and she's no help.

That's my sister-in-law.
Lucille Carter, Freddy Fox.

- Oh, how do you do?
- How do you do?

Been very nice meeting you. Goodbye sir,
you better hurry back before you be late.

We just got here.

Yeah, I know but you don't
want to miss your plane.

If you're late, they'll start
the movie without you.

Why are you trying
to get rid of us?

- Well I— - Ah-ha, I know.

You do?

Yes. You forgot to
make the sandwiches.

Sandwich? Oh no, I
made the sandwiches.

- Well, go, and get them. Get them.
- Oh okay.

Give me your coat, Fred.

I'll hang these up in the closet
and we can drink our coffee.

I'll take them.
I'll hang them up.

I'm perfectly capable of hanging
up coats in my own closet.

- Harry! This is a beautiful ship model.
- Oh yeah. Yeah?

- I swear somebody grabbed those
coats right off of my hands.
- I did.

Oh. Well, get the
sandwiches please.

Oh sandwiches, yes
sir. Coming right up, sir.

Now, that is an American
Brigantine. A friend of mine made it.

Really?

It's a scale model..look
let me get some light on

this because I want you
to see the detail in that.

It's simply magnificent. He worked
for months and months and months.

- Now, you see,
the cannon, those are eight pounders.
- Oh, really.

Those are to scale and
you can see here on the

figure head, if you move
it with the light you can...

Lucille.

What is the banquet
table doing there?

What banquet table?

The one with all the food on it.

Oh! You said you wanted a snack.

Lucille, just what is going
on here? What? What? What?

- Well look. I might as well tell you.
- Yes, yes tell.

When you called from the airport
and said that you were coming home,

I just got on the phone
and I called some of your

dearest friends altogether
for a surprise party.

- A surprise party?
- Yeah.

Alright everybody,
you can come out now.

Everyone here he is.

Good old Harry, the nicest
man in the whole world.

Come on, everybody sing
Happy Birthday to good old Harry.

[singing] Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday
dear Harry, happy birthday to you!

Well, thank you everybody. Harry
was sure surprised. Thank you.

Harry you are just
as popular as ever.

A lot of men couldn't get this
many people together in 15 minutes.

Well, that's the way the
old popularity ball bounces.

Either you have
it, or you hadn't.

That's true. Harry not
only has it, he's full of it.

- Excuse me a minute.
- Oh, sure.

Lucille, Lucille, now this phony
celebration doesn't fool me one bit.

You and I know perfectly
well when my birthday is.

It's six months from now.

You know it and I know it but
your classmate doesn't know it.

I just made you the most
popular man on campus again.

Well, for that I'm
grudgingly in your debt.

However, you are
not off the hook.

You were trying to put something
over on me and I want to know what it is.

- [doorbell] I'll get it.
- I'll go with you.

You don't have to. I can
handle this all by myself.

Oh, I won't. I'm not going
to let you out of my sight.

Good afternoon.
I'm Father Lambros.

- Father Lambros?
- Father Lambros.

Yes. You are the groom?

The groom? I'm no groom.

In that case, you must be
the grandfather of the groom.

Grandfather?

We must all proceed to the church
for the wedding. Ah, Constantine.

Father Lambros!

Wedding.

Lucille.

Yes, grandpa.

So, that's it.

You rented out my house for a
wedding reception that's horrible.

I didn't rent your house.
I'm letting them use it free.

That's even worse!

For what reason would
have for doing that.

Harry, if you knew two
people were in love and wanting

to get married and they
didn't have a reception hall

and there's just wasn't one available
and your house was available,

now you would let them
use it, wouldn't you?

Well, let me put it this way.

No wonder that
little voice deep down

inside of you keep
saying [blows raspberry]!

Now, just a minute.

Did I say they couldn't use
my house for the reception?

- Do you think I'm that cold and heartless?
- Yes.

Well, I am not.
I'm just annoyed.

A wedding reception is
going on in my house and

you are taking the
credit for my generosity.

Oh well, it's credit you want.

Hey everybody come
here, I want three cheers

for popular, congenial,
lovable old Harry.

Yassou! Yassou! Yassou!

There's your credit.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Harry, I hate to pull you
away from your friends

but we've got to get
back to the airport.

- Oh, I'll get your coat.
- Thank you.

Friends, friends, I must take my
leave but please stay as long as you like.

My house is your house.

[singing] For he's
a jolly good fellow,

for he's a jolly good fellow,
for he's a jolly good fellow—

Which nobody can deny.

Lucy! Lucy!

Look at the wedding
cake. Isn't it beautiful?

Yeah, it's beautiful.

Lightheaded lady,
come down with me.

- Oh! Would you take care of it?
- Yeah, go ahead, dear.

Oh, it is a beauty.

Don't forget to save me a
piece of the wedding cake.

Lucille, don't forget to save
me a piece of the wedding cake.

Lucy! Lucy, it took me
five hours to bake that cake.

- You made this cake?
- Yes.

- Oh, it's delicious!
- Oh, thank you!

What's the recipe?

Six cups of sugar,
three cups of flour...