02x05 - Episode 5

[bunniefuu]

I wanted to meet a member

of the unit

who so infuriated Hitler.

I have a nephew, about his age.

Bang!

Bang!

Any one of you who surrenders

is to be ex*cuted.

So this was a kind of a Last Supper.

Bill Stirling ordered me

not to let you go

anywhere near the front line.

Welcome to the SAS.

I gave you one extra day of life.

Since you're not SAS,

I guess you can give this one to me.

I don't think so.

First-ever engagement of 2SAS

Speed up! Get out of the way!

..will be one of the most important

engagements of the w*r

in Europe so far.

Fighting beside some

of the best soldiers on Earth.

Come on!

Yeah!

Go!

Reg! Matteo!

He's got no chance, Reg.

SOLDIER: Raus!

HE EXHALES HEAVILY

HE EXHALES HEAVILY

HE EXHALES HEAVILY

HE SINGS SOFTLY TO SELF

MAN SPEAKS IN GERMAN

MAN SPEAKS IN GERMAN

I know the last words of a lot

of people are rather heroic,

but, um

Look, never mind. All right?

MAN SPEAKS IN GERMAN

f*ck you.

And your mothers, your fathers,

and your f*cking boyfriends,

they can all f*ck off.

All right, look, just give me

another swig of that schnapps.

MAN SPEAKS IN GERMAN

SOLDIER SHOUTS IN GERMAN

SHOUTING AND g*nshots

THEY SHOUT IN GERMAN

THEY TALK IN GERMAN

TALK IN GERMAN

TALK IN GERMAN

VOICES GROW QUIETER

CHURCH BELLS TOLL IN DISTANCE

CHURCH BELLS TOLL LOUDLY

Squad.

Squad. ..tion!

Stand easy.

Where is Cooper?

Hospital, sir.

Concussion, broken rib.

Right.

Here are the accounts

from our recent exchange

in the defence

of the town of Termoli.

21 men of the Special Air Service

lost their lives

during our successful engagement

with the enemy.

Many have sustained injuries.

McLachlean critically.

Others are missing

or taken prisoner.

We who are gathered here

are what remains of us.

Those taken prisoner

will be dead now.

Dead by the rising sun,

blindfolded and shot.

Because our enemy is

too afraid of us to let us live.

So now we are indeed liberated

to be the dogs we are.

Paddy.

We're here to bury comrades.

We will now share the privilege

..of reading the names

of those who fell.

Parachutist G Cassidy.

Lance Corporal L Crisp.

Parachutist S Davison.

Parachutist A Duncan.

Lance Corporal JW Faversham.

HE CLEARS HIS THROA

Sergeant JS Findlay.

Lance Corporal CM Grant.

Parachutist E Grimster.

Parachutist WH Hearne.

HE BREATHES HEAVILY

No. No, I can't.

Sergeant JB Henderson.

Lance Corporal JO Hodgkinson.

Parachutist WM McAlpine.

Good man.

Lance Corporal J McDonald.

Sergeant B McNinch.

Sergeant O'Dowd.

Parachutist Pocock.

Lance Corporal Scherzinger.

Silifants.

Skinner.

Stewart-Johnson.

Wilson.

And also Sergeant Seekings.

Sergeant Reginald Seekings.

Don't you dare put your name

on that list, Reg.

Staff Sergeant Jim Almonds.

Riley.

Cooper.

Kershaw.

Pull yourself together,

will you, Reg?

Paddy Mayne.

Show some respect, lad.

Say my name again.

Major Paddy Mayne.

Skinner.

Seekings.

Riley.

Cooper.

Fraser.

Kershaw.

Say my name again.

Mayne.

Put me at the front.

Put me in first.

Put me where I won't last a day.

Every night lasts ten years.

I can't live that long.

Now you're making sense.

Send me with a bayonet, Paddy.

Here we see the final stages

of a process, men.

The living soldier

who wants to be on that list.

Now you're truly unstoppable.

I hereby promote you

to the rank of Staff Sergeant.

All those in favour say aye.

We are not human any more, Paddy.

Soldier's Bible.

And you can keep it,

since I know it by heart.

Now piss off while we sing a hymn.

Go.

Abide With Me, lads.

SOLDIERS: ♪ Abide with me

♪ Fast falls the eventide

♪ The darkness deepens

♪ Lord, with me abide ♪

SOLDIERS CONTINUE SINGING

HE GROANS

♪ Heaven's morning breaks

♪ And Earth's vain shadows flee

♪ In life, in death, O Lord

♪ Abide with me. ♪

West.

South.

Sunshine, decent boots.

And very good company.

Everything a Boy Scout could

possibly need, eh?

Ah

320 miles.

Piece of cake.

I thought I'd give you time

to pay your respects.

But now I'm afraid it really is time

for you to go.

Who packed my things?

A nurse tending

to some of our wounded.

My driver will take you back

to Bagnara.

Eve, you really don't have a choice.

You can't stay here.

Last night, I used a transceiver

to radio London.

I spoke to my editor.

Your editor?

Who had spoken

to President de Gaulle,

who had recently spoken

to the Minister for w*r,

who had spoken

to General Montgomery,

who is the Supreme Commander

of all British forces.

Yes, I know

who General Montgomery is.

What I don't think you know

is that he's on his way to Termoli

right now to congratulate the SAS

on resisting the German advance.

I had London send a coded transcript

to confirm de Gaulle's instruction

to me to stay in Termoli,

to speak with the important visitor

as official representative

of the Free French forces in Italy.

What Free French forces?

The ones that will be sent

to join you in preparation

for the liberation of France.

I understand

Lieutenant General Dempsey is

going to tell you all about it

when he gets here.

He's coming along with Montgomery.

Classified material.

I will burn it.

Change of plan, unforeseen.

Return to your duties.

Lieutenant Colonel Stirling,

I am not leaving the front line

until we reach Paris, where I will

buy you a bottle of champagne.

HE GROANS

HE PANTS

HE SNIFFS

HE RETCHES

PLATE CLANGS AGAINST DOOR

AEROPLANE ENGINES HUM

MEN SHOU

♪ Fare thee well, Enniskillen

♪ Fare thee well for a while

♪ And all around the borders

of Erin's green isle

♪ And when the w*r is over ♪

SINGING BECOMES DISTORTED

The song dies when you stop singing.

♪ A beautiful damsel

of fame and renown

♪ A gentleman's daughter

from Monaghan town ♪

I could order you to sing,

but you sound like a f*cking camel.

I am a camel, Paddy.

Carrying a great weight.

You mean me?

You mean my mortal soul, is that it?

I mean I'm carrying

a great weight, Paddy.

Oh, f*cking not you as well!

♪ They were all dressed out

like gentlemen's sons

♪ Their fine shining sabres

and their carbine g*ns

♪ The silver-mounted pistols

she observed them full soon

♪ Because she loved

an Enniskillen Dragoon. ♪

I am on a tour of my men,

hoping to boost morale.

How is your morale?

No English.

Riley!

Translation required.

Vaffanculo!

♪ And we're all welcome home ♪

I am on a morale-boosting exercise,

and I sense there might be an issue

that is affecting the morale

of our wee Italian friend here.

MEN CONTINUE SINGING

What, do you want me

to translate that?

It is a moral issue involving you,

Sergeant Major.

HE SPEAKS IN ITALIAN

I think you might have gotten

his goat.

Yeah, I think I might have

gotten his goat, too.

HE SPEAKS SOFTLY IN ITALIAN

Alessia is not your wife.

Yeah, she's free to choose.

And she chose Yankee Doodle Doo.

♪ And when the w*r is over

♪ We'll return in full bloom

♪ And we'll all welcome home ♪

Whoa! Drop it!

MEN CHEER AND LAUGH

MAN: Go on, mate! Come on!

MEN CHEER

♪ Well, I feel pretty good

♪ And I guess that I could

get crazy now, baby

♪ Cos we all got in tune

♪ When my dressing-room

got hazy now, baby

♪ I know how you want it, child,

hot, quick and tight

♪ The girls can't stand it

when you're doin' it right ♪

Anything serious?

Pretty hilarious actually.

Couple of bones broken.

This is about that woman.

♪ You gotta have it, baby

♪ You can't do without

♪ When you get the feeling,

you gotta sock 'em out ♪

Whoa!

How was the burial?

Everyone was buggered except for me.

The Lord is my shepherd.

I shall not want.

General.

Welcome to Italy SAS headquarters.

Major Paddy Mayne.

I have a delivery

for you and your men.

There's been an order from GHQ

to all SAS personnel.

By order of GHQ, not me

..these are the new

..the new berets that 1SAS and 2SAS

will now wear at all times

while on active and ceremonial duty.

The old sand-coloured berets

will now be

..forbidden.

MAN: What?! Good Lord.

And you will all, without exception,

be required to wear the new beret,

as of, well, as of right now.

Lieutenant, as you can see,

my men and I are grieving.

So we are in no position

to do anything right now,

let alone sell our souls.

I appreciate that, but Now

..I respectfully urge you

to reconsider your interruption

and save this futile discussion

regarding headwear

for a more suitable time.

What say you, sweet pea?

I say that,

in three or four minutes' time

..Lieutenant General Dempsey,

Commander of 13th Corps,

Eighth Army,

and General Montgomery,

Commander of British forces,

will be walking

into the monastery courtyard

for an inspection of the troops.

f*cking hell!

MEN MUTTER

And General Montgomery

will be expecting all SAS soldiers

to be wearing the maroon beret.

Anyone disobeying the order

..will face being put on a charge,

sir.

Fortunately, the monks who once

lived here were very self-contained.

There's a well here,

which produces clean, fresh water.

And there's a legend

that this is a holy well,

that if you drink from it,

you have your wish fulfilled.

General, this is Eve Mansour,

a French w*r correspondent.

A representative.

She is on the itinerary, sir.

For much later.

General de Gaulle sends

his congratulations

on the success of Operation Devon.

Apparently, you were

on the itinerary for later.

And yet here I am at the well,

making a wish.

And what is your wish?

That Free French soldiers

in southern provinces of France

receive training from SAS soldiers

in advance of the invasion

and liberation of my country.

Her country is actually Algeria,

sir.

And when France is liberated,

I will work just as hard

for the liberation of Algeria.

Eve Mansour? Yes.

I will see youlater.

Next. This way, sir.

Thank you. Thank you.

To the left, please, gentlemen.

This was once the refectory

where the monks dined,

but now we use it for a mess

Now it is where your men relax?

Yes. Oh, look.

A rear molar.

Excellent.

Take me to meet these wild beasts.

This way, sir.

GLASS CRUNCHES AND SMASHES

Parade!

Parade! ..tion!

Staff Sergeant Jim Almonds, sir,

won the Military Medal

in North Africa.

How are you coping, Sergeant?

Coping very well. Thank you, sir.

What do you think of the new beret?

I think it's very elegant, sir.

Wasted on a head like mine. Ah.

Oh, well, Jim's head could

be improved by a bucket, sir.

In my opinion.

Er, Sergeant Kershaw, sir.

A sergeant with opinions.

You don't wait to be spoken to

before you speak?

In our unit,

we're encouraged to speak

if you think you've got

something to say that'll, er,

that'll improve the mood, sir.

And if you all speak at once?

Then we decide who's right,

by fighting each other, sir.

With fists and cutlery.

Isn't that right, lads?

HE BELCHES

Pardon me, sir. Just popped up.

The mood is indeed improved.

Staff Sergeant Reg Seekings,

newly promoted.

Won the Military Medal in Sicily.

Encounter after encounter.

How are you coping?

I'm coping extremely well.

Thank you, sir.

Good.

But, sir

..I'm coping extremely well.

Thank you, sir.

Major Robert Blair 'Paddy' Mayne.

So

..the famous Paddy Mayne.

I'm not sure

how I could be famous, sir,

when I am not sure myself

of who I am.

You appear to be wearing

the wrong beret, Major Mayne.

No, actually,

I don't think I am, sir.

Every single one of these men

smells of alcohol.

They've just attended the funeral

of 21 comrades, sir.

Though, in all honesty,

we'd have taken a drink

by now, anyway.

And the reason I personally object

to the maroon beret

is that it makes us look the same

as every other parachute regiment

in the British Army.

But we are not the same

as ANY unit in the British Army.

As this parade has

probably already proven to you, sir,

we are slightly drunk, opinionated,

and borderline

insubordinate delinquent. Paddy

And our unique ability is

to operate behind enemy lines

without regulation,

in any way we see fit,

inflicting the maximum amount

of damage on an unsuspecting enemy,

without being directed

by Central Command.

If I hadn't made that wee speech

to your face when I had the chance,

sir, I would have regretted it.

And being an impulsive man,

I cannot afford regrets.

Men like these

..should not be ordered

to simply run at machine g*ns.

It is an abuse of their courage.

You have my personal permission

to carry on wearing

your sand-coloured beret.

And for the avoidance of doubt,

as far as High Command

is concerned

..we do not care

about the mental health,

psychological conditions,

or the levels of insubordination

amongst your men.

Just so long as you keep winning.

Await further orders,

Major Paddy Mayne.

Sir.

Next.

EVE: The SAS working

alongside the Free French,

just as they did in North Africa,

is our best chance of survival.

And I have witnessed first-hand

how the SAS can work

alongside local resistance

and partisan soldiers.

Actually, now you mention his name,

I do remember meeting your father.

He was a colonel.

He led the North African Brigade

at Ypres.

That's where I met him.

I wonder what your father would make

of you being amongst this rabble.

CHUCKLING

TO SELF: Ha, f*cking, ha.

He would admire the bravery

they display

and the results they achieve.

More tea?

Sir, according to the itinerary,

General Montgomery should have left

ten minutes ago.

Yes, I know.

The delay is being caused

by the Commander of British forces

being briefed

on how to liberate France

by a f*cking journalist.

Go and tell them politely

that their time's up.

And, er, invite the journalist

to join me

for a glass of wine later.

Yes, sir.

LIGHTNING CRACKS

GOATS BLEA

Ah!

Oh!

Oh.

HE SIGHS

Oh, God.

GOATS BLEA

HE SIGHS

Well, never milked a goat before,

but

..I'm going to learn.

A warning -

my hands are rather cold.

FOOTSTEPS APPROACH

Inglese! Inglese! Inglese!

Inglese.

I was about to milk your goat.

Another hour and I would have

eaten the f*ck.

HE CHUCKLES TO SELF

Where is your husband?

I saw him walk off in the rain.

Where did he go?

MAN SPEAKS IN ITALIAN

D'accordo.

MAN SPEAKS IN ITALIAN

Mussolini, eh?

Bad man.

Yes?

Il Duce.

JOHN BLOWS RASPBERRY

Ah.

You went to a neighbour's, perhaps.

What is the going rate

for an escaped Allied soldier?

10,000 lire is what I heard.

VEHICLE APPROACHES

10,000 lire.

KNOCK AT DOOR

SHE SHOUTS IN ITALIAN

Shh-shh!

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!

YELLS: Stop!

Partisan.

The farmer fetched us.

We are here to help you.

Well, I am sorry.

Madre mia.

Oh.

So, where exactly are you taking me?

LIGHTNING CRACKS

Someone will be coming? Yes?

CAR ENGINE REVS

Hey! Hey! Hey!

MAN SHOUTS

SHOUTING

How was your discussion

of military strategy

with the General?

Polite.

Ah.

Of course they're lying to me

about their plans,

but at least now

I'm someone they lie to.

What exactly is it

that you want Montgomery to do?

To not lie to me.

To not be lied to by the French

because I'm Algerian,

to not be lied to by the British

because I'm French.

I can't think of a single occasion

when I've lied to you.

Hmm.

No.

But there is always a first time.

Tell me,

what do you think of me?

What do I think of you?

Goodness.

You get angry with me

as if I matter.

You think I'm a spy.

You arrange cars to take me away.

And yet

And yet what?

I asked you a question.

What do I think of you?

The truth.

Er

Think I love my wife.

I miss my children.

And as regards you,

there's nothing I can do

about what my own stupid self

allows me to feel.

You have no idea

how much I admire you.

What do you admire about me?

Today, General Montgomery

was persuaded to make a decision.

For the rest of the Italian campaign

and during the liberation of France,

the SAS will return

to its former way of operating.

They will be working behind

enemy lines without GHQ command.

Montgomery was also persuaded

that they should once again

be called SAS.

SRS will no longer be used.

And the person who persuaded him

to make those decisions was you.

"Throwing men like these

at machine g*ns

"is a waste of their courage,"

you said.

I listened in on you

just as you listened in on me.

And Montgomery repeated what I said,

word for word, to Paddy Mayne.

Why don't you tell Paddy Mayne

that you are actually on his side?

David gave me some advice.

For Paddy Mayne to function,

he needs someone to rebel against.

And that someone is you?

I'm perfect for the job,

don't you think?

Landed, entitled, titled,

slightly serious.

Not one of them at all.

Celebrate the fact

that you are not one of them.

KNOCK AT DOOR

General Montgomery left this.

New orders, apparently.

Oof!

HE GROANS

HE GROANS

MEN SHOU

Ah!

What a f*cking nuisance!

Argh!

Argh!

HE GROANS

Argh.

Any of yous in any way nostalgic

for the days

of well-defined strategies?

I would like a vague idea

about where we are,

what the f*ck we're doing

and why we're doing it.

Am I being picky?

This is an officially designated

2SAS operation.

This is 2SAS standing

on their own two feet.

We will, for the first wee while,

be holding their hand.

GREVILLE-BELL:

Happy landings, gentlemen?

POPPING AND CRUNCHING

What is that noise?

Oh, that.

It's my ribs scraping together.

Listen.

POPPING AND CRUNCHING

I've broken three of them.

But anyway,

we divide into two groups.

Captain Dudgeon will lead his party

east towards La Spezia.

My party will head north

and concentrate

on the Genoa-Bologna line.

I will take you 1SAS scoundrels

and show you how it's done.

No-one in 2SAS speaks Italian,

so the chap with the nice hat

who looks annoyed about something

will go with Dudgeon,

and the lady will come with us.

With respect, can I suggest

that both partisans go with Dudgeon?

Something about Anglo-Italian

relations.

We should keep

Romeo and Juliet apart

while some of us try to win a w*r.

OK.

Let's blow up some trains.

You'll be all right.

TRAIN HORN BLARES

RIBS CRUNCHING

Doesn't that hurt you, lad?

Oh, I played a lot of rugby.

On the field of play,

you never show pain.

Oh, right.

TRAIN HORN BLARES IN DISTANCE

RUMBLING

METALLIC ECHOING

Right, we're OK.

Two and a half miles away,

travelling roughly 40mph, Jim.

Can you really do that?

Yeah, well, in Liverpool,

I didn't play rugby,

I played truant, messed about

on the train tracks as a kid, like.

I was always the lookout, you see.

That's very impressive, Kershaw.

Ah, you're welcome.

TRAIN APPROACHES

Bloody hell! Kershaw!

Sorry, lads. I was 20 seconds out.

What the f*ck were you thinking?

Jesus Christ! Move!

TRAIN HORN BLARES

Take cover!

ECHOING RINGS

Bloody hell.

♪ Nobody gonna take my car

♪ I'm gonna race it to the ground

♪ Nobody gonna beat my car

♪ It's gonna break

the speed of sound

♪ Ooh, it's a k*lling machine

♪ It's got everything

♪ Like a driving power

♪ Big fat tyres and everything

♪ I love it!

♪ And I need it

♪ I feel it

♪ Yeah!

♪ It's a hurricane

♪ All right, hold tight

♪ I'm a highway star

♪ Nobody gonna take my girl

♪ I'm gonna keep her till the end

♪ Nobody gonna have my girl

♪ She stays close on every bend

♪ Ooh, she's a k*lling machine

♪ She's got everything

♪ Like a moving mouth

♪ Body control and everything

♪ I love her

♪ I need her

♪ I see her

♪ Yeah, she turns me on

♪ All right, hold tight

♪ I'm a highway star. ♪

THEY CHEER

Yeah, let's get some more!

PADDY: Going through!

Two wee boys,

and all yous want is to go home.

Tut-tut-tut-tut-tut.

Paddy, you know what they would do

to us if it was the other way round.

Reg! f*ck would line us up

and sh**t us!

Hey?

Paddy, give the order.

Tell him to put the f*cking g*n

down. Geneva Convention, Reg.

f*ck the convention!

You tell him right now, Paddy.

You order him to stop now.

Go ahead, Staff Sergeant.

You're no use to me

with all that hate in you.

Get it out of your system.

Blow the boy's brains out.

When you get home to England,

you can tell your wife, Monica,

and your nieces and nephew

..you tell them

exactly what you did.

And when you're

just good old Reggie,

back from the pub

on a Saturday night

..you'll look into the fire,

you'll see that boy's face,

that wee boy there.

And the way you look

into the flames,

your own wife will be terrified

of you.

Go ahead, Reggie.

Do unto them

as they would do unto us.

Amen.

g*n CLICKS

GUNSHO

Billyhere. Get him up.

Give them a drink

of whatever the f*ck we have left.

Let's get on to the rendezvous.

CAR ENGINES REV

Sir It's all right.

When we get to France,

they will say, "C'est la guerre."

Jump on, let's go.

MEN SPEAK IN DISTANCE

Oh, my God.

Daphne Reece-Williams?

Uh

I might not look much like him now,

but

..I'm John Tonkin.

My, uh

My sister used to ride

in show jumping competitions

with you, in the Pony Club,

Guildford.

You always won, she always cried.

Horrid Johnny?

Yes. Horrid Johnny.

Uh Are you real?

Yes. I married an Italian.

Are you real?

Yes. Uh, you married an Italian

..I've been k*lling Italians.

Goodness, how odd this is.

Yes, I'm with a regiment

where odd things tend to happen

rather a lot.

I don't know if this is God or fate.

What with the w*r and everything,

I've got myself in rather a pickle.

Can I come in?

But of course.

I will make tea.

Tea would be nice.

What's happened to the lads

that went to La Spezia?

They ran into a German camp.

Foster, Shortall,

Dudgeon and Brunt were captured.

Foster and Shortall were

taken to Ponzano Magra.

Dudgeon and Brunt

were picked up at La Cisa.

The new command from Hitler

regarding SAS prisoners

..was carried out to the letter.

SHOUTS AND g*nshots INAUDIBLE

g*nshots INAUDIBLE

And what about the partisans?

The lady took a b*llet

and was lying wounded.

Chap in the hat dashed in

to save her.

They were both k*lled.

Sorry, lad.

I'm glad we're us, Dave.

I'm glad we're us, Reg.

PADDY: Right. Listen up.

Ahem.

Mission completed.

We have a new task to prepare for.

We leave Italy

to the ordinary soldiers now.

We

..the men

of the Special Air Service,

1st and 2nd

..we're going home.

MEN SHOU

DOOR BANGS

BANGING ON DOORS

DOOR BANGS

KEYS JANGLE IN DOOR

David! Stirling, it's me!

The Allied troops are moving north.

The Italian government has fallen.

The Italian guards have

left the camp.

DAVID GROANS

The guards have gone, David!

I still have 15 days left.

No, no, no, no, you don't.

We all have 20 minutes

to get the hell out of here.

The Italian guards are gone,

but the German troops are coming

up the mountain to take their place.

David.

Did you hear me?

We have 20 minutes to get free.

Come on, David!

MEN SHOU

♪ This and that,

they must be the same

♪ What is legal is just what's real

♪ What I'm given to understand

♪ Is exactly what I steal

♪ I wormed my way

into the heart of the crowd

♪ Wormed my way

into the heart of the crowd

♪ I was shocked to find

what was allowed

♪ I didn't lose myself

in the crowd. ♪