01x01 - American Poison

[bunniefuu]

I'll grab that. Thank you.

Excuse me.

Sorry.

Excuse me.

Mother, why are you sneaking around?

It's starting soon, and he's not here.

Nan, Lord Richard's not here.

It's fine. Go downstairs.

Well, how can it ever be fine?

- Is Conchita dressed?

- Yes, quite dressed. Go downstairs.

I was never supposed to be

the main character.

Always more than glad

- to let Jinny, my sister

- He'll come.

and my friends compete for all of that.

Because I know he'll come.

Girls are taught to believe

that if a story isn't a love story,

it's a tragedy.

- And I had no interest at all

- What if he doesn't?

in being involved

with either one of those.

The whole world knew

that my best friend's was a love story.

A whirlwind romance

with a handsome English lord

can only be followed

by a huge society wedding,

to make entirely certain

anyone not envious of Conchita yet,

soon would be.

But nobody's jealous of a bride

whose groom has failed to show.

Anything?

- Nothing. And downstairs?

- Well, the guests have barely noticed.

- Conchie, he will come.

- But today was supposed to be

the most beautiful day--

And the whole world is here.

Gosh, I hate him. You have no idea

how much I loathe him.

God.

Of course, I love him.

I know I love him. I love him.

I just-- I should have known.

Last night

he just seemed so much further away.

Richard's never further away

- than just right here.

- Oh, Nan.

I should have told him, shouldn't I?

But I don't want him to marry me

because he has to,

I want him to marry me

because he adores me.

Yes.

I'm ruined.

Where is he?

- Most of the guests are already on their--

- It'll be fine.

What if we just started

putting on the dress,

- and then he'll get here any second--

- No, Nan. I just don't know.

- What are we gonna do?

- I'm gonna go get it.

No, Nan, you idiot.

What are you doing?

Stop. What are you doing?

- Nan, you're insane.

- I'll get it.

- Oh, my God.

- What is she doing?

That girl!

I'm not escaping or anything.

- No!

- I'm sorry.

Are you sure you ought to--

- I got it! I got it!

- Yes! Yes, Nan!

Nan, you look an absolute fright.

That's always what you wanna hear.

Come inside! The wedding!

- Yeah, my wedding.

- Yes, there's a wedding.

- And nobody likes to talk about it.

- Come in and clean yourself up!

- For the wedding.

- You heard about that.

Apparently you can't be too clean

for a wedding.

- Yeah.

- What a fuss everyone makes.

Do you want to get married?

No-- I'm not-- I didn't-- That wasn't--

That wasn't a proposal.

- Nan. Come on, Nan. I need you. Let's go.

- Annabel, do stop causing a commotion.

Tricky things, mothers.

That's not my mother.

That's my governess, Miss Testvalley.

- And come inside, please.

- Yes.

I really do need to

Oh, Nan, look! He's here.

It's d*ck's carriage.

Of course he's here!

- Nan, come on! I need to get dressed!

- He's here!

I'm getting married!

Nan.

Listen, don't say a word.

I've not slept a wink all night.

I need you to give this to Conchita.

No. And I don't believe

you want her to have it either.

There's not an ounce of bad in Conchita.

No, of course not,

but it's only my parents.

Don't say parents.

They wouldn't want to come, of course.

I'm nothing but trouble

at the best of times.

Well, hasn't this summer been

the best of times?

- With Conchita?

- Yes.

I've never known times like it.

But will she work in England?

Will she fit in?

Conchita's not someone

that goes unnoticed.

She's like the sun.

- And today, it's just s--

- Today's just for show.

Conchita's father is in love

with you being a lord

and for all of New York to see

how much money he's made.

Conchita's in love with you.

Gosh.

Yes. And your parents want you to do what?

I don't know. Go home

and start acting sensibly, I expect.

- Oh, God, Nan. She's a miracle.

- Yes.

- I get drunk on her.

- Yes! It's you and Conchita.

Who wants to act sensibly?

And who wants their life to go unnoticed?

Where are you going?

Inside to marry my beautiful

wonderful wife!

Nan,

you tell Conchita I love her.

She already knows, you idiot.

Driver, front entrance, please.

I'm getting married.

You are

the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.

Apart from Jinny.

And Lizzy.

And the poodle.

Well, then you're in my top five.

- Top five?

- No, top six, for sure.

Of course you have no interest at all

in being admired.

Well, I have no interest

in the man doing the admiring.

I can admire myself, can't I?

You're complicated. We're complicated.

- It's fine, I'll pick--

- Conchita, you look so beautiful.

You look amazing.

Girls, here is to a new world.

Marriages, men, parties.

Not particularly in that order.

Which comes first?

Darlings, we always come first.

- Always.

- Always.

Shall we swear on it

in blood or champagne?

- Champagne!

- Of course!

Good luck.

You won't forget me

when you go to England, right?

Who are you again?

Wow.

- Be the party.

- We are the party.

I need to take

these garters off. It's so scratchy.

Ladies.

Sorry.

Meet me.

- Sorry.

- Sorry.

I keep bumping into people on staircases.

Yes. Well, it is a hazard

when you dance on them.

Yeah. Well, I'm generally

a strictly walk-down-stairs man.

Perhaps a little skip,

if there's something at the bottom

I'm particularly pleased to see.

It's the worst timing of my life,

but I've really got to go.

- Where you going?

- Home. My mother's going to die.

Sorry, I can't believe

I'm saying that out loud.

And not that doctors always, you know

They hardly ever know anything.

Anyway,

I couldn't get a boat before tonight,

no matter who I begged.

But I've really gotta

You'll get home, and your mother

will be delighted to see you.

If only you could come with me.

I did. From there to here.

Our first trip.

By the way, I'm Nan. Nan St. George.

Bye then, Nan St. George.

We're here. We're right in it.

- And it only took five years.

- Yep. Only five short years.

My dear, when we were neighbors

back in little old Saratoga,

who could have thought--

That when we moved here,

you'd be right behind us.

That unbred laugh.

Sweetheart, you are here now.

Enjoy.

Ladies.

Well, I guess over here

is the best view of the party.

Look. It's Mrs. Paramore.

She's here. Look at her dress.

Oh, Mrs. Paramore.

We were hoping to catch you in regards

to invitations to the Assembly Ball.

I'm Mrs. St. George, Mrs. Paramore.

And this is my Jinny.

One of the bridesmaids.

- And my Lizzy.

- Oh, yes. St. George.

- The family from Saratoga.

- We live in the city now.

- My husband did awful well at the stock--

- Good for him. Good for all of you.

Mrs. Closson,

- your canapés are fit for a lord.

- Why thank you.

I'm sorry, Mother, was I supposed--

- No. You did just as you should.

- Mrs. St. George,

I'm afraid you can't attend

a New York ball of any kind this season.

- Well, I see no reason, now th--

- My mother--

Lady Brightlingsea.

Why, yes, of course.

Yes. My mother, she insists

that I invite you and your daughters,

Conchita's bridesmaids, to London.

London?

London, London? England?

- All of Conchita's bridesmaids?

- There was talk, Mrs. Paramore,

that for certain girls of refinement,

New York has become too limited.

- Very limited, I quite agree.

- Yes, I quite agree too.

And there's an urgency

The start of the season.

in order that Jinny

and the other debutantes

may be presented at the Debutante's Ball.

To the Queen.

The Queen.

Well, that is very kind

of Lady Brightlingsea.

And Mrs. Paramore,

next season when Jinny returns,

if she returns,

she may be persuaded to drop in

on your little Assembly Ball.

Miss Testvalley, do you know Lord Richard?

Well, Annabel, as you'll soon see,

England is a very small place.

Lady Hopeleigh wrote yesterday

and asked me to remind--

Lady Hopeleigh has no business

reminding me of anything.

Jean Hopeleigh makes her debut this week

at the Queen's Ball.

And you know her future is in your hands.

Mother, Jean Hopeleigh should know

I'll never marry anyone

who hunts me for the sake of my title.

She has clear skin, Theodore,

open eyes, level shoulders.

And she's not vacuous, as some are.

You know those occasions fill me--

I know you'd have yourself replaced

by a mechanical Duke of Tintagel,

if it were up to you.

The staring I can cope with.

But it's the noise and the nonsen--

Just to look, Theodore. For me.

And a young lady of refinement, please.

Do come back in. Nan.

Look, an English tree.

An English hedge!

An English sheep in an English field.

How do you do, sheep?

Nan, please.

Jinny, your hair will be impossible.

How do you think

Jinny will wear her hair tonight?

On her head.

Yes, perhaps. Though, Lizzy, I'm sure

a lord will spot yours is glossier.

I'm just saying your complexion dazzles

compared to Lizzy's.

Lizzy's my best friend, Mother.

We'll be sure of a grand welcome

from Lord and Lady "Brightlingsey."

It's "Brittlesey," Mother.

I've told you a hundred times.

"Brittlesey." That's how you pronounce it.

That's me. I can't get it in my head.

I'm sure Lord Richard's parents

will be quite charming.

You worked for them, Miss Testvalley.

Are they?

Charming?

Yes. Yes

in their own way.

There's a whole

ghastly, spitting crew of them.

Only Virginia and Elizabeth,

the two eldest, are debutantes.

Yet they insist on coming mob-handed.

James, you do know as the second son,

you must either make a fortune

or marry one.

They're all new money, yes.

And I'm quite sure they'll be frightful,

but if New York's rejects must be

our mended roofs,

then we may have to suffer invasion.

But at least we shall be dry.

So I am to be sold to the highest bidder?

And do I have a choice?

Yes, of course you do.

There are two of them.

Will he be lost without me, Nan?

Father? Of course.

And I hope

you might be taller without him.

I hope you girls will always be tall.

Us? We're giants.

Look at Jinny, she's a skyscraper.

- Mabel!

- I can see you!

And we could all be skyscrapers together.

I wonder

if Conchita's burst yet with happiness.

Girls!

Girls, hi!

Girls!

Conchie!

- Nan!

- Look at you.

You're just perfect.

Goodness.

Girls, girls, girls.

They're never still. Not one of them.

They toss about so.

Well, watch out

as they're tossing in our direction.

Before we know it, there won't be

a family left in England

without American poison in its veins.

But without them,

how shall we afford poison

or veins?

Window-shopping?

A casual bystander.

You say they're all as rich as Conchita,

Mama?

One of the fathers is

in the American army.

American army? There isn't any.

They call him "Colonel."

In the United States

they call dentists "Colonel."

Girls, you can't imagine what a toll

pregnancy takes on your dancing.

Let's go inside.

Let me show you the house.

Has our dancing suffered,

do you suppose, since pregnancy?

I'm sure I've had no complaints.

What a blessing, Mrs. Elmsworth,

that Conchita is so heavily with child.

Blooming, indeed.

And so very few months since her wedding.

Of course, they pretend the Queen bit

is the start of the season,

but that's just the afternoon appetizer.

The evening's where the fun begins.

The ball.

So I hope you brought your finery

for tomorrow.

Every girl in London is just breathless

for the Debutante's Ball.

They've waited their entire lives

to see a real-life duke,

then parade down stairs for a husband.

They're so proud of how old things are,

they forget that in the modern world

we now have radiators

and electric lights.

Conchie, are you all right?

This place is a pit full of snakes.

Watch you don't get bitten.

Does everybody feel the butterflies,

do you suppose?

My dear, our husbands only made

their money in trade,

so our butterflies are inferior.

How dare we even exist?

Five years of doors in our faces.

I'm surprised our noses

aren't entirely flat with it.

Get used to an ocean of silence,

and swim about in it as well as you can.

I haven't drowned yet.

Isn't the soup heaven?

It's so red. And warm.

- Isn't it warm, Mrs. Elmsworth?

- It's warm soup, all right.

Well, if I've learned anything

about the English,

they sure know how to heat soup.

But not too warm. That's the relief

of it, Lady "Brightlingsea."

- Brightlingsea.

-"Brittlesey". Lady Brightlingsea.

We've missed you in New York,

Lord Richard.

He's been far too busy to miss you.

England's just bursting with activity

and possibility for men.

And what's wonderful for us girls

is that we get to sit home

and wait for them to come back.

What is it tomorrow, Richard?

Riding, sh**ting, cards?

Not all at once, I hope.

That wouldn't be--

On a horse.

On a horse.

I like your pictures, Lord Seadown.

Do you like all of them?

Oh, well, I--

I like a lot of them.

Worth a flat-out fortune, I bet.

How lucky they haven't had to be sold.

Richard has a knack for picking up things

that are worth money.

Is that Lady Jane Grey?

- La-- Where?

- Yet there are so few portraits of her.

I thought that could be a George Gower.

But if that's Lady Jane Grey,

then that's--

That would be too early for Gower,

wouldn't it?

You know, I always thought

that being a queen for nine days

was a very short time, but that was

before I crossed the Atlantic.

That's very good.

What do you think of the portrait,

Miss St. George?

I like her arms.

Is it really only half past 10:00?

It's not the clocks

that are slow, it's this place.

Girls, I've been

so starved of beauty and chatter.

Seadown wasn't starved tonight.

Perhaps at the ball tomorrow,

you could try not to attract attention.

Oh, yes. Yes, of course.

I can make some space

for your expert art observations.

"I like her arms."

I will make sure.

Stop.

Do you even clean your nails?

Look at that.

Wait. Tomorrow, I must show you

the dress that I'm wearing.

I'm gonna-- Stop.

I'm going.

It's gonna be worth it.

Chin up, darling.

You are still the pretty one.

And one day, I'll be

the used-to-be-pretty one.

What on Earth are you all doing in there?

Being human.

- This isn't New York, Conchita.

- I'm aware.

Whatever happened to "being the party"?

Well, now you're Lady Marable,

so it's time to be the wife.

It's not how anybody here behaves.

I did ask you to behave.

- Perhaps you should get a dog.

- You chose to come here.

I chose you. I love you.

And I love you.

But the glaring and the jibes,

everyone on both sides.

It's a b*ttlefield.

I'll be back next week.

You're leaving?

With your wife in this state?

Well, you have weeks yet.

And what about the ball?

I'm sorry.

I need to not be here for a while.

Well, without you, they won't let me go.

- Conchita, I'm sorry.

- So I won't go. Perfect.

- Conchie, are you all right?

- No, I'm not all right.

I'm not gonna go to the ball.

If I want to be ignored

and disapproved of, I can just stay home.

I said it, didn't I?

She might not fit in in England.

- But you also said you get drunk on her.

- Yes, and being drunk is great fun.

Of course it is, but not every day.

Not morning till night.

Not with my parents watching.

One expects it all gets easier

after the funeral.

It doesn't, of course.

So, tomorrow, the Debutante's Ball?

Yes.

What else is to be done?

Your mother was the most beautiful woman

I ever saw.

Utterly unpaintable.

"As low as possible,"

Miss Testvalley said.

And then the Queen extends her hand--

And you lick it.

Do you think the Queen will notice

if a curl comes out?

Mother will notice.

Yes, she will. And remember,

chin up, eyes down.

Speak to every man there,

but only use short words

because we don't want to confuse anyone.

Don't ask. The bird came off worse.

Oh, Jinny. Wait till London sees you.

Girls, you must promise

to dance till you're dizzy.

Dance? Have you seen my shoes?

- I can't walk.

- I can do it.

Dance till you're dizzy. Do you hear me?

Come on, Nan! Come on!

Jinny, come on.

Come on, girls. This isn't playtime.

Please. Carriages are on their way.

Jinny, this is your moment.

You'll only get one,

so let's take it seriously.

- Come, come, come.

- Conchie

are you all right?

I didn't love him

because he was a lord, darling, did I?

And now, it's like he's not even a man.

We boarded that ship equals,

and it's like every inch

he got closer to home,

he just got further away from me.

Oh, God, I'm so happy that you're here.

Listen, Nan

when this baby comes, will you

I will be here.

- Yeah.

- I will be here. Of course, I will.

- Good.

- Yeah.

- 'Cause it's an actual baby.

- Yes.

How do you even

And it's gonna look like me.

You know, lucky baby.

That's virtually

the whole point of babies,

but it's not gonna look like them.

What if they look at my baby

the same way they look at me?

Well, I will be here. I promise you that.

- Really?

- Yes, of course.

Oh, Nan.

So the girls just have to walk

down the stairs,

and then the men all get to pick one?

I wish Conchita was here.

That cake.

I'd go and look at it,

but I can barely walk.

My shoes are really bothering me.

Why's everyone--

- Who is he?

- The guest of honor,

the Duke of Tintagel.

- Duke?

- No.

The greatest match in England.

Oh, Nan.

That's it, girls.

Look at where you're going.

Though I hear the duke's mother

has made her choice for him already.

There, look. Jean Hopeleigh.

And the duke is the perfect son.

There they are.

Head up, Jinny. Shoulders back.

Fourteen on form.

Nan?

Americans, they say.

Outspoken, then, and vulgar.

Imagine the bucketloads of cash.

Imagine them on their backs

with their legs spread.

Or imagine them as human beings

with no interest at all in your opinion

and not caring if you're a king

or a mister.

Nan St. George.

Window, earring, staircase.

Sorry, I'm just blurting out words.

You.

So, have you had enough?

They're like cattle.

That's rather harsh.

I think they're all lovely.

Yes, they are lovely as anything,

but they're also human beings

who are funny and smart.

How is your mother?

I'm so sorry.

Shall we?

Absolutely.

Shall we?

I can't decide if I wanna eat it

or if I wanna hide in it.

Well, it's a long night.

I'm sure we can make time for both.

Do you miss her?

It's almost more than that.

Mothers are irreplaceable.

I miss the world that had her in it.

Well, actually, I also miss my father,

even when I'm in a room with him.

What on earth? What was that?

Just keep dancing.

This is really bad, isn't it?

This is as bad as it gets.

You should absolutely

never be allowed up high.

- Earrings, shoes

- The earring wasn't my fault.

In future,

if you so much as stand on a chair--

What? What will you do?

Stop you, I suppose,

in some way.

Annabel!

I told you. She's not even

supposed to be interested.

You were the same at dinner last night.

How am I supposed to get people

to notice me with her?

You're doing a good job

of people noticing you now.

But I am trying so hard and I'm so tired,

and this dress is so tight.

And actually, Nan doesn't even

like any of this,

the lords and the titles and so on.

She thinks it's all silly.

True. It's stupid.

Who wants to be a part of this--

I do. I like it. I wanted to meet someone.

And we've come all this way,

and you're causing a commotion,

as always, and everything's ruined.

I'm sure your sister is trying

as hard as you.

She dropped a shoe in a cake.

Why do you always take her side

and stick up for her?

Do you even know why?

Where is your pride?

My pride, Virginia?

Why, it's here.

Right here.

It's in Nan, and it's in you. My girls.

I'm sorry.

- You don't get it, Nan. You don't get it.

- What?

It's no different from New York. Here,

they just hate us for a different reason.

- And it's my job to be noticed.

- But you were noticed.

- Everyone in there was saying--

- I made the tiniest bit of progress.

Meanwhile, you're being fascinating

all over the place,

thinking of something funny

or smart to say,

or having men lick cake from your fingers.

- It wasn't men, it was one man.

- This isn't a joke, Nan.

This is my whole life. It matters.

Mother is forever standing up for you

and putting you ahead of me.

When I say that I'm doing a good job,

she says, "Well, so is Nan."

And, you know, it shouldn't be about you.

It shouldn't ever be about you,

'cause you're not her daughter, Nan.

What?

I shouldn't have said that.

Said what? What did you just say?

- No, Nan.

- What did you just say?

It's not my fault they kept it a secret.

I was only a little girl.

- You know what Daddy's like. It was--

- Kept what secret?

One of Daddy's dalliances had

Mother wanted to avoid a scandal.

Nobody knew, and nobody knows.

Nan, I really shouldn't have

told you that. I'm sorry.

Please don't tell Mother that I told you.

- Please, Nan.

- There you both are.

Now, Annabel, we have come all this way,

and it does seem

that you are something of a distraction.

So Miss Testvalley has kindly offered

that, tomorrow at first light,

- just for a week or two--

- Some early nights, Nan.

The castles we've talked of.

The fresh sea air in Cornwall.

Lady Hopeleigh says

Jean waited for you at the ball.

She's free to wait.

And what are you free to do, Theo?

To be left alone, Mother,

till I meet a girl who doesn't know

what a duke is.

I can't think where one

would find such a being.

I'm sick of being tracked

like a wild animal.

I think I'll stretch my legs.

Nan?

Nan!

Did you talk to the bank?

It's worse than I thought.

How did it go with the American girl?

Yes, I saw her

and I believe it's all going to plan.

Then you'll be needing this.

Your mother's.

Oh, for heaven's sake,

English women have been

getting on with the job for generations

with no need for any silly fuss.

- Baby's coming.

- Okay.

Big push. Good girl.

I didn't know anyone was

I startled you, I--

If I'd known there was somebody else, I

I'm sorry.

That's okay.

Not mine, I see.

No. They would be--

- They would be rather

- Restrictive?

- Yes.

- Yes.

You're an artist?

- I paint.

- Really?

I was just

I was just looking at the light.

Isn't it just

I can't think of a better place to paint,

though I've barely held a brush

in my life.

Well, the beach makes artists of us all.

Oh, yeah. Well, not just the beach.

I mean, the cliffs.

And the castle.

Have you seen the castle up close?

It's extraordinary.

So I believe.

- Anyway, I--

- Anyway--

- I should

- Yes.

I'm Nan.

Theo.

- Theo?

- Theo.

May I?

Oh, God. It's just a mistake.

It's a--

- Well, I--

- It's a bird.

- Well, it--

- It's beautiful.

Well, it looks like a

- frog or something.

- No.

It's hopeless, so I've started again

kind of.

Well, imagine what it might become.

I'm sorry. It's rare, I believe,

to be able to talk so freely

with a person you know so little.

Do you think so?

I think it's easier somehow.

Perhaps we might--

I'm often down here to paint or swim.

No, I'm afraid we're going home

to New York.

Well, that's a great shame.

Good luck with your frog-birds?

Thank you.

Goodbye.