01x22 - Charlie Horse for Class President

[bunniefuu]

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jozek on you need to leave your watching

KTV save kids

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if you're into fun and you love to play

if you like funny jokes they put you

away if you like to die in slamming

sound and you're about to see

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you know sometimes being a big sister

can be a quite a job especially when you

have to babysit a six-year-old who calls

himself Bobby the brat it was her

brother and it was Saturday morning and

it was her job to get him breakfast but

she couldn't find him he always liked to

hide just when she called him and she

looked from the top of the house down to

the bottom of the house she really

searched no Bobby

so she searched from Bobby's room all

the way across to her room on the other

side of the house and then back again

but no Bobby

so she really searched the ground floor

looking right up to the staircase on one

side and then right up to the staircase

on the other side couldn't find him so

she thought maybe he's hiding in the

curtains so she went to her room and she

spread the curtains open him but she

couldn't find him

she went to Bobby's room and she spread

the curtains open but no Bobby she even

looked under the rug no Bobby

then she realized this boy did not like

it when it was dark so she went to her

room and she turned off the lights and

shut the door and she went to Bobby's

room and she turned off the light and

shut the door by that time she was so

exhausted she went to the sofa and sat

down to take a nap and as she sat down

you know what she heard

ouch it wasn't the sofa talking it was

Bobby he was hiding right under the sofa

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you crazy

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the skunk said on a stone the skunk said

this don't stunk the stone said the

scope stone what do you think stomp the

skunk or the stump

it is a beautiful day d a.y and we're

gonna spell it all out for you and you

yo yo yo yo are going to be able to read

everything we spell I don't care how old

you are

just watch and sing and spell along with

us come on come on

it's a beautiful day

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for Justin

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we

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[Applause]

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it's a beautiful day

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if you want we could bring

make believe we're in space

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I'll just stand here

I've been waitin okay

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just pick up and fly

I often pause and wonder that life's

peculiar ways cuz nearly all our famous

people were born on holidays that's

right I want to share in those dead

sherry did you how about this for a

slogan vote for Charlie horse for class

president and school will be cool you

like it good yeah I know I'm a genius

bye John okay hush puppy let me see that

sign you've been working on Charlie h*s

is a winner who's Johnny hose you'll

nerd I ain't no nerd yes you are you

left out the are Charlie h*s there's a

winner Oh how's dad charlie horse are a

winner oh you're right dad is better no

it's not horse has an R in it h o r SE

how am I supposed to get elected class

president if my own goofy campaign

manager can't even spell my name

hey Hoss look it's gonna be a close race

that Gloria Morgenstern has a lot of

friends I like a dude oh good god

maybe you should be her campaign manager

and spell her name wrong oh come on

Charlie h*s you're my best friend I'd

never leave you

yeah how about if it got down on my

knees and begged you to leave me no not

even then well you nincompoop

I know nincompoop you better shape up

because I don't intend to lose

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the moment you dare tell yourself a joke

[Applause]

Oh what I'll pay attention I have a joke

I love jokes me too

this one goes that's it no no that was

just me

clearing night fell out oh okay what's

the joke horn but no motor no wheels how

can it go the car has a horn but no

motor and no wheels how can it go

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[Laughter]

serious Jerry you can't be serious

oh yeah I ain't Charlie Lawson friend no

mall but look if charlie horse insulted

you you would have just say to him

charley horse you insulted me and it

makes me feel bad and then he'd

understand you alright

of course then he'd k*ll me he wouldn't

k*ll you you just go up to him and look

him in the eye and tell it like it is

yeah that's how I'm going to do I'm

going look at me down tell it like it is

good hey Cherie where are you yeah what

he's done out of sight hey you notice

anything different about me Cherie no oh

you should why because you are looking

at the newly elected class president of

mrs. Fogelman fourth grade homeroom

that's wonderful but I thought the

election was tomorrow it is but trust me

cookie on the end wait a minute wait a

minute if the elections tomorrow how do

you know you wanted because I called

everybody in the class and I asked them

how they're gonna vote and it's 50/50

right right down the middle you mean

half of them are voting for you and the

other half are voting for that sure lost

glory and Loggins Stern yeah but if if

it's down the middle and each of you

only has half the votes why do you say

you won because the one person that I

didn't call the one vote that I didn't

count yet is my very best friend who oh

good old house Buffy he would do

anything in the world for me don't thank

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all right oh well they say you can tell

how old a horse is by counting his teeth

so so I put my hand in charley horses

mouth to see how old he was

he closed his mouth to count how many

fingers I have smarty I hope the

popcorns not too salty no not too

buttery no just right good good hey hey

hey how do you like all those comic

books I gave to you there son

good good well you know oh no problem

old buddy after all what are friends for

oh you didn't give me time to think

about that one Chelios dad ain't an easy

question ok ok is there anything else I

can do for you know that chuckles you're

trying to bribe me bride bride hey

little buddy of mine that is the

furthest thing from my mind how about

another black cherry soda pop you know

I've been taken advantage of you

anything nice no you haven't

oh yeah I know that you've been good to

me says I'll vote for you but you don't

have to treat me nice for diet I don't

take no no matter how you treats me I

wouldn't vote for you anyway

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I got a riddle yes that it is a little

you solve the riddle will say if mrs.

sippy or miss Suri's New Jersey

what would Delaware I'll ask live stinks

what is the matter charlie horse do you

know you're not gonna believe this

try me my very best friend you know hush

thought they yeah he has just become

Gloria Morgenstern's campaign manager

that is a blown yeah I don't know what I

ever did to deserve that

well maybe if you think a little it

might come to you but you remain you are

so mean - nothing I was not yes you

called him some big names come on he's

my best friend

yeah but how would you like it if he

called you're a nincompoop

well I like Charlie you know you

insulted him you know yes you did and

you don't insult your best friend Jay

how was I to know that calling him names

was gonna consult and hurt his feelings

I mean I call him their names all the

time hire stop doing well how are you

doing hushpuppy Lee I'm fine considering

I've already lost two jobs just one day

what do you mean two jobs well you know

that girl Gloria Morgenstern yeah you

know what she wanted me to do just

because Alice our campaign manager what

she expected me to vote for her I mean I

told her no way no way I'm gonna vote

for my best friend Julio's yeah but you

told me I know what I told you Charlie

darling but you know I was just trying

to bring you to your senses oh gee I

think it's time for an apology all right

I'm sorry Charlie Hollis not you oh uh

me yeah uh-huh

I am sorry I'm really

hushpuppy you are truly my best friend I

got feelings too

okay Lambchop you can be my very best

friend also oh yeah but not right now

when can I be your best friend when

you're old enough to vote it's a game

it's called flip and I want you to know

who it's a lot harder than it looks

sound so simple you put two juice cans

or soda cans or I have juice boxes

that's what I happen to have handy you

put them about six inches apart across a

table from you and then you crumble up a

little piece of paper or aluminum foil

into a ball I have lots of little ba*ls

all crumpled up ready to play and the

aim of the game is to try to flick a

ball right through the goal for all you

soccer or hockey fans now I'm gonna get

it through our lamb I'm gonna do it this

time I know well I can do it this time

oh well this time is it what's wrong I'm

gonna do it I did it

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if every you start feeling blue cuz

things are going wrong the very best

thing you can do is sing a little

sing-along song friends will start to

join them

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it's a real good thing sing a little

sing-along song

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nice gets happier hands get clappy when

you say you say lots a lot son she'll be

coming round about she comes

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she'll be right and six white horses

when she comes whoa batshit me riding

six white horses when she comes up

she'll be riding says my horses she'll

be riding since my verses should be

riding six my arses when she comes up

and we'll all go out to meet hi babe

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yum-yum-yum

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chicken and dumplings when she comes

yeah yeah ChaCha

hi babe

single

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Oh lamb chop look at that weren't you

the cutest baby yes baby

and you were so smart hi you were very

smart did I sing and dance and recite

and no and no and no leave me right

there there not because you were so shy

yeah yeah I got over it

oh boy did you get over being shot but

the fact is most children get over being

shy you kind of outgrow it very uh-huh I

don't even remember being shy oh I do

well I tell me tell me tell me tell me

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come on come on stop being shy tomorrow

when we see everybody would you like to

sing for them no sing would you care to

dance

no I don't know dance all right I want

to tell a story

yes oh really yeah well what story do

you want to tell that's your story yes

the baby story is short baby yes but

when you tell a story you don't say the

end until the end yes okay I'm gonna

tell you a story sherry had a little

lamb whose fleece was white as snow and

everywhere that Mary went Halle Halle

sherry sherry everywhere that sherry

went the lamb was sure to go it followed

her to school one gaga

no no there's more ma it followed her to

school one day

yes which was against the rules

and it made the children laugh and play

to see a lamb at school later on that

girl that's it you're fat

yes I'm finished you're absolutely right

the end you're a very smart baby lamb

chop gosh

Mei gotta go if you go to school

say bye bye

when I was a baby I was really smart

wasn't I yeah I wonder what happened I'm

teasing I'm teasing

you guys who is going to do the poem I'm

going to sing a poem oh good what poem

are you gonna sing three blind mice no

no no no not three blind mice why not

oh there's so much violence in that poem

I like violence I wish I could play line

not violins violence all right all right

I won't do it it's your turn okay I'm

going yeah I'll just taught you hickory

dickory dock do that I don't even and

that make sure you do come on try it

yeah when you go to the lake

what do you sit on same thing you'll sit

on the dock you see there to hold the

dock is somebody sick Lambchop recite

the mouth how'd he get in the mouse's in

the poem the mouse is in the poem forget

it forget it you forgot it it's my turn

now no no no I'm gonna do three blind

mice even if it's violent alright and

I'm gonna do hickory dickory dock even

if I forget it let's do it at the same

time at the same time yeah ok you

connect to the shire

are you kidding I'm just gonna watch

watch what do you mean watch well you

know

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three blind mice

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are you tired like these seats are so

far away I can hardly see lamp job yes

too bad look I'm still here huh we're

gonna tell a story and everybody at home

you have a part in this story the story

is about a fox now foxes are in the

doggie family it's called the canine

family but I like to call it that doggie

family and because they're like doggies

foxes make doggy like sounds really some

go some go whoa

every time I say the word Fox you guys

and you guys have to make the sound okay

okay let's try it once upon a time there

was now the Fox is not the only

character in the story it's the only one

I have here here's a fox aren't they

cute

I love it but the other character in the

story is a little TV and I don't mean

your mother's sister I mean a little

buggy and show me how tiny your aunt is

how tiny is yours there's that big okay

so every time I talk about an aunt what

are you guys gonna do she'll be okay

and here we go you got your part you

know it okay once upon a time there was

a fox good woof woof woof woof and the

Fox was very boastful he used to brag

I'm the fastest runner in the whole

forest

now that annoyed the other animals as

you can imagine so one day a little ant

came up to the Fox and said quit your

boasting you're not so fast I could beat

you in a race any day

well Paul Fox was shocked he said how

can this little ant beat me in a race

the other animals were shocked too and

so on the day of the race they all lined

up

well the Frog who was going to start the

race said ribbit ribbit

that's what frogs say he said rabbit I

will say 1 2 3 go

and that will start the race now the Fox

a little lined up and when the Frog had

said 1 2 3 and got to the goal part the

Fox started to run but the little jumped

on to the tail of of our Fox and as the

fog ran glandt

climbed up the tail and across the back

and onto the head and down the nose and

when the Fox got to the finish line the

little ant jumped off the nose and on to

the finish line and looked up at the Fox

did you remember that wolf off and he

said where have you been I've been

waiting for you for five minutes

well the Fox was shocked he did not know

how the little ant had beaten him in a

race and the other animals who knew

never told the Fox and we're not gonna

tell either are we

this is the song that does it and yes it

goes on and on my friend some people

started singing it not knowing what it

was and they'll continue singing

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this is the song that Charlie no no stop

stop stop

Charlie stop I want you to go away go

away and don't slam door funding for

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