01x02 - The Department of Magical Violations/Teacher's Pal

[bunniefuu]

Hazel moved to the city ♪

Feeling all alone ♪

Till her

whole life changed ♪

With a pair quite strange ♪

'Cause in reality,

they're her new ♪

Odd parents,

"Fairly OddParents" ♪

- Wands and wings! ♪

- Floaty crown-y things! ♪

Odd parents,

"Fairly OddParents" ♪

A new wish

for magic hijinks ♪

Fish guy, pizza fries ♪

Penny-farthing

dirt bike rides ♪

Ghost snoops, major whoops ♪

Baryonyx, time loops ♪

Pretty great,

you've got it made ♪

With "Fairly OddParents"! ♪

Princess,

you will be my prisoner!

Is there no one

who can save me?

I'll save you,

Princess Cosmo!

Hah!

I'm going to kick

your butt, Seahorse!

Seahorses don't have butts.

It's impossible

to find pants that fit

when you have no butt.

Hah!

This old seahorse

is going out to pasture.

Oh Hazel, you saved me!

My hero!

After 99 wishes,

your 100th wish was

a Fun Fantasy on us!

And now, I wish

we were back at my house!

That was awesome!

Thanks for granting

my fun wish.

Oh, no!

It's Jorgen Von Strangle,

the toughest fairy

in the universe!

Nice to meet you, Jorgen.

I'm Hazel, girl whose roof

you demolished.

Charmed.

Literally.

Jorgen is commander

of all fairy godparents.

If he's here, that means

we did something wrong.

Cosmo and Wanda,

I had you down as retired.

Yet out of nowhere,

you choose your own child,

who was to be assigned

to a different fairy entirely!

What?

I was going to have

a different fairy godparent?

Yep, the best

fairy godparent, me!

I'm Cookie.

All kids love cookies.

And this little cutie

is my friend, Furray.

Cookie is

my most efficient fairy.

She's able to grant wishes

in no time flat.

Time for a surprise

fairy inspection!

If you three want to continue

as godparents and godchild,

you must prove

you can work together.

Tiny girl, wish now!

Wow.

Right away?

Oh, OK.

Um, I wish

oh, no.

Mind blank. Brain bad!

I--I--the pressure!

Oh, dear.

We created a wish fart!

both: Eww.

Ugh.

And this one stinks,

stanks, and stunks.

Pee-yew.

All three of you must go

to Fairy World for wish trials!

If Cosmo and Wanda cannot grant

this tiny human child's

three wishes

to my satisfaction,

she will be

reassigned to Cookie.

You're going

to love me, Hazel.

Behold!

Fairy World!

Cool!

But where we are going

is no fun at all.

The Fairy DMV!

The DMV?

I love the DMV!

Tedious structure

and drab settings

is my happy place.

Not that DMV!

The Department

of Magical Violations

is not for having fun.

It's for having stress!

Let the wish trials begin!

Ah! I'm not ready!

I haven't even been

to Wishing School yet!

That is not a thing.

Now, for the first trial,

I'm stripping Cosmo

of his wings and his magic.

And you have to make a wish

to save his puny life

before the time runs out.

You have 22 seconds!

I'm OK.

I have a good grip.

Cookie-cookie-coo!

Not to add more stress,

but if you don't wish quick,

Cosmo's going to crash

down on those jagged rocks!

Time is

tick-tick-tickin', honey.

Gyah!

I--I wish

Cosmo had a parachute!

Wait, no!

I wish he had

a trampoline instead.

Is that better?

Cool!

Not cool. Not cool!

Quick, Hazel,

make another wish!

I--I wish for a mattress!

Good job, Hazel.

- Yeah!

- Whoo-hoo!

Bad job, everyone!

I said make "a" wish.

This child made,

like, a bajillion of them!

And Wanda, you failed to grant

the wishes before Cosmo fell.

For the next trial,

Wanda is throwing a party!

Small girl person,

you must get everyone dancing,

or else--

Gah.

I wish for a DJ.

No! A robot DJ.

Uh it plays mumble rap.

No! "Beethoven's Fifth."

Oh, wait, death metal!

Doo-wop, doo-wah,

doo-wop, doo-die!

Let's get this party started!

Cosmo, you failed

to get this party started.

You shut it down.

Like, good "shut it down"?

No!

Like "created

an evil musical robot

that destroyed the party"

shut it down!

Now, I am the only one

who can defeat him,

in a dance-off.

- Whoo-hoo!

- Oh, yeah, dance-off!

Guys, I'm sorry

I keep messing up.

I don't know

what's wrong with me.

You're in your head is all.

If you just make one wish,

loud and proud,

we'll be able to help you out.

This is our last chance!

No pressure.

Yeah, the fate

of our relationship

as fairy godparents

and human godchild

hangs in the balance.

But no pressure!

OK.

If they cannot deliver

on this last trial,

have your wand ready.

My wand stay ready.

Furray?

For the final trial,

the small-for-her-size kid

must make a wish

for a mode of transport.

Right here! Right now!

I know exactly what I want.

Antony and I used to joke

about how silly

this bike would look

if it were real.

OK, I wish for one of those--

those old-timey bicycles

An auto-bicycle?

A monocycle?

- A motorcycle!

- A moped!

- A scooter?

- Not those!

But it's old, and it's got,

like, a big wheel

and a little wheel.

And it's mixed

with one of those bikes

that Antony likes to ride.

Ugh!

Why can't I think

of the names right now?

Don't you worry, Hazel.

Cookie knows

what you're wishing for.

Incredible!

This is what makes Cookie

the superior choice.

She's a precision fairy.

- But--

- And now, the bite-sized girl

is taking a bite of a cookie?

I've seen enough.

Cookie knows what kids want.

And according to "Da Rules,"

"A child must always get

what they want."

But we granted every wish.

But we didn't fail.

As a trio,

your wishes were chaos.

Then Cookie tries

and, boom, car!

Does anybody want to know

what I think about all this?

No! The wish trials are over!

Cosmo and Wanda,

you will henceforth

return to your retirement.

Bite-sized human, say hello

to your new fairy godparent,

Cookie!

Welcome to my empire!

No!

Well, go ahead.

Wish for something.

Um, well, I--

Here's the latest doll.

I'd kind of like

to make up my own.

You want

the latest makeup trend?

Girl, "bootify" yourself!

No, what I want is--

Of course! Cookies!

All kids love cookies.

Baked at 350 degrees

Fahrenheit.

You haven't gotten

a wish right all day.

And I hate

chocolate chip cookies!

But all kids love--

See? That's your problem.

If you'd stop interrupting me

and listen,

you'd know what I really like

is oatmeal

chocolate chip cookies.

Fine.

Make a wish then.

Oh, I'll make a wish,

all right.

I wish for a thing

that exists but doesn't.

Oh, no,

I can't think of the name.

It's, like, big but also small.

Really!

Ugh!

I could smell that wish fart

all the way in Fairy World!

I didn't wish fart.

That was the kid.

The fairy who denied it

supplied it, Cookie.

All day, you've been saying

Cosmo, Wanda, and I failed.

But you were putting

too much pressure on me.

Meanwhile, Cookie ignores me

and poofs out

whatever she thinks of.

But with Cookie,

you get results.

I'd rather get my messy wish

than a cookie cutter wish

I didn't even ask for.

Here's a wish for you.

I wish Cosmo and Wanda

were my fairy godparents!

I'm Cosmo!

And I'm Wanda!

both: And we're

your fairy godparents again!

You can't do that.

Actually, they can do that

because according

to "Da Rules,"

"A child must always get

what they want."

- Ow!

- And she wants you.

Sure do.

Without all that

extra pressure,

I remember my wish:

a penny-farthing dirt bike.

Are my fairy godparents ready?

Let's roll, godkid!

What was that?

Oh, I thought you said

a "penny-farting" dirt bike.