01x01 - How We Used to Be

[bunniefuu]

♪ Ah, ah ♪

♪ Ah, ah ♪

What happened to me
changed my life forever,

and people say... this too shall pass,

and I say, no, not for me.

This is my story now.

Sorry it was an accident.

Are you waiting for the next 23?

No, I can get the 188.

Ah! Which is coming in,

right. Okay, so...

I'm just gonna go for it.

Obviously you are way

out of my league

and I dunno if it's something about you

or the fact that I can literally

see your bus come down the road right now.

But I'm, I'm feeling pretty emboldened

so I'm just gonna say it.

Would you like to come

to a party...

with me...

now?

I gathered that,

I dunno if you make a
habit of propositioning

random strangers at bus shelters,

but it's pretty unorthodox.

Okay, so how does this usually go?

Well, usually goes
and more often than not

takes place in a bar, not a bus shelter.

But can I buy you a drink?

Can I buy you a drink?

Sorry.

I'm Ben.

I'm Jess.

After it happened, I thought I'd

never get over it.

And you hear people say it a lot.

Sometimes it's figurative and

sometimes it's for effect.

But when I say it, it's
none of those things.

It's just the truth.

I...

was...

devastated.

Come on.

All right.

- I'm tired already.
- We just started already,

you kidding? Right.

- It's gonna take forever.
- Yeah,

I'm kind of regretting that

top floor flat now.

Well done,

can you grab me a beer?

Do you know today's our 13 month

and 3 week anniversary.

- Anniversary what?
- Us.

Yeah, I know, but what?

First time we met, first time we

went on a date, first time

- that we...
- Mm.

Although to be fair,

I suppose the first time we met

sort of became our first date,

which also sort of became the first time.

- I love you.
- Well, you're bouncy

aren't you?

You just found us this flat.

Ahhh!

I need some tea and a wee

and not necessarily

- in that order.
- I've got a deadline

- and I can't find them.
- Yeah,

well I've not been down here

for two weeks so whatever it is,

you can't blame me.

- You all right?
- Yeah

Okay... Well I can tell

that you're lying but you are late

and I need some wee

so I'm gonna let you off.

Mum.

Thanks for coming down.

Wouldn't want to be anywhere else.

Hey!

Hey.

- How'd it go?
- Good, yeah.

I spoke to the features editor,

Dee, and she said if I bump

the piece off by 500 words

then it can go on the

- main paper.
- Do you want some cake?

- Ehh... No.
- Are you sure?

Yeah, why?

Because I wanna tell you something,

but I want you to be

in a good mood when I do.

Just tell me now.

I'm pregnant.

Tell me what you are feeling.

Happy...

and a bit scared

but...

but yeah,

you're happy?

I mean, it's what we've

always wanted, isn't it

you and me and a flat a family

and I mean about 10 years too early.

But... let's do it.

I said let's do it, we've already done it,

really, haven't we?

But sorry, erm...

- if that's what you want.
- That's what I want.

Don't mean it goes without saying,

I'm terrified, but...

yeah, that's what I want.

- I'm gonna get some cake.
- Yeah

- So is this your first baby?
- What gave us away?

Yeah, we just want it to be okay.

Well...

well, I can tell you

that it is.

- Thank you.
- Thanks.

In fact, it's doubly okay

See?

You said you weren't allowed

- to be certain
- because it's twins.

- Wait...
- You're having twins.

- What do we do now?
- I don't know.

Open it.

Oh, you just do it.

It's a boy and a girl.

What's wrong?

I wanted a girl.

I know.

I love him just as much though.

I know.

Can I ask you a question?

Nope.

- Well, I'm gonna ask anyway.
- You're the boss.

Literally.

Look, I know I've asked you

this before but since then,

have you considered writing about it?

Yes and no.

Meaning?

Yes, I've considered it and no,

I'm not doing it.

Why?

Because I don't even
like to think about it,

and if I were to write about it then

I'd have to think about it a lot and...

Well, some people think that

by writing about a

- difficult experience
- You help other people going

through the same experience, yet,

I don't believe that I, I'm sorry,

but I don't...

I can't do it.

Right, ready?

Come, sit down before

- you hurt yourself
- What? You used to love

- my moves.
- I used to tolerate them.

Hey, you
should have seen the way

- your mother used to...
- Enough!

Come here!

- Get off.
- Right there it is.

My famous barbecue chicken.

What's famous about it?

- How dry it is.
- You see what I'm

- dealing with?
- I do.

Right, Ben I need to ask you something.

Erm, so there are some obvious

cultural differences

- between us.
- Dad...

No, no, no, it's important.

I need to ask. Is it your intention

to raise these children

as Oldham fans?

- Indeed, yeah.
- I'm sorry, dad, I tried.

We've talked about buying them,

those little... erm...

- Oldham Athletic baby grows.
- That is never gonna happen.

Hey, where you going?

To the toilet.

Mum?

- Mum!
- Oh

Promise me something...

Look, if it's

- about Arsenal...
- Promise me...

you'll keep her safe.

I promise.

Ben?!

Ben?!

- Ben!
- What?

Ben!

Ben...

I think the babies are coming.

You all right?

Are you sure?

Okay, remember they
said this would happen.

I'm scared. What do we do?

Look at me, look at me.

Everything and everyone

is gonna be fine. I promise.

I'm just gonna look at you,

okay?

- Love you.
- Love you too.

Ready nurse?

Here we go.

All right?

There we go...

Here she is.

Ben?

Ben? Can you see? Yes.

Why isn't she crying?

She's just a little

- quiet, that's all.
- Yeah,

- she's fine.
- Okay, okay

Yeah.

Okay, here we go.

There we go...

Hello, you.

Hi

Hi.

Okay, let's

put out a crash call.

Neonatal crash call.

Theatre one.

What's happening?

Everything's going to be fine.

Nurses, anything?

- No.
- Right,

let's bag them immediately.

What does that mean?

It's best if you just stay back

Ben... what's happening?

What's going on? What's going on?

Are they okay?

Nothing here? Anything?

Not yet.

Come on little one,

come on little one.

Breathing here,

but faint.

Breathing, good.

Breathing here too,

but very faint, hardly anything.

I need a fast scan and call

peads and intensive care.

Losing it again...

It's gone.

Ben, do something

I-I can't, I can't
Excuse me, please

Let's get them

to ICU.

What's, what's happening?

Which one's not breathing?

Daddy, are you coming?

Don't leave them alone!

Wait! Wait! Jess,

- are you okay?
- Let's go.

She'll be fine...

- just... just go.
- I love you.

This way. Which one's

not breathing? Can you tell me

which one's not breathing?

Daddy? Yes, Jack.

Why are we going quick, quick?

Because you took too long

with your honey on toast

and I couldn't find your other shoe

and yeah, it's a combination

- of factors.
- What does that mean?

It means lots of reasons.

Come on this way.

How's Jack?

He's good.

- Where is erm...?
- Shh..shh... shh

she's there.

Oh, he likes the rabbit.

Oh... no he doesn't.

Yeah, that's thirty quid

well spent.

Do you wanna try and feed?

Okay, so remember n*pples to nose.

See how it goes.

Hello?

Oh! He's doing it.

So... I've been thinking

about what I want to give them.

In life...

and I don't know

if it's because I'm sleep deprived or

the fact that I've been staring

at that wall for the last six hours

but I think I've realised what it is.

Huh?

Intensive care.

Just keep it clean.

Yes.

That's our taxi.

Listen, I'm sure you hear this

all the time...

- but thank you so much...
- Yeah.

- For everything.
- Thank you.

Wow. Good luck.

Come on then.

Come on daddy...

You ready to be a parent?

Not even nearly.

Yeah, me neither.

I thought you said

- you'd been practising.
- Yeah, I have.

No, it doesn't show.

Right, I'll go and get

your bag and we're away.

Okay...

Ouch..oooh

- You okay?
- Yeah.

I'll pull round to the side mate.

Thanks.

- Here, I'll give you a hand.
- It's fine, it's my job.

I found that under... a pile of stuff.

BP is seventy over twenty

and resps are twenty four.

Okay, let's get her

on the bed.

This is Jack he's two
days old. He's conscious

and appears unharmed.

This is Poppy, she's also two days old.

This one's not responding.

Let's get in the line now,

- quickly please.
- She has

lacerations to her legs and arms.

GCS is three, pulse is 122.

Okay,

she's not breathing. Call theatre

and cut her out of this.

- Now please!
- Let's

get a line in and call transfusion

we're gonna need lots of O neg. Someone,

call theatre and tell them we have

a multiple trauma case and that we need

someone now. Do we have a next of kin?

Me - Next of kin?

Me - She's arresting,

starting CPR now.

Breathing! I've got a

- pulse!
- She's

not responding.

Come on now,

come on Poppy.

Come on now Poppy, come on.

Daddy?

I have a tummy ache too.

They'll need to stay in

for another 24 hour observation,

but you should go home.

- Get some rest.
- I'm not leaving them alone.

Oh, Charlie...

Ben's phoning.

Hello?

I was looking at that picture

you sent us aren't they beautiful,

how are you? How's Jess?

Ben?

She um...

Ben?

She died.