01x07 - Chapter Seven: Ball Bags

[bunniefuu]

[theme music]

Hello, Steve.

I'm your daughter.

You didn't know about me, hey?

Bet you knew about

them other kids,

and you still dumped 'em.

Won't be making that

mistake again.

That's it.

Say goodbye to your ball bags.

[whip cracking]

[choral female vocals]

[horses neighing]

[Robyn VO] Them

missionaries reckoned,

thou shall not use protection,

for it was a sin.

Ringer said that

was just an excuse

for dickheads to go running

around the countryside

leaving a trail of kids behind.

But now I had the answer -

castration.

[people chattering]

[truck approaching]

Here, here

Hold these, hold these.

[retching]

Nah All good.

[man burping loudly]

So how do you know

old Steve-o then?

Oh, I don't.

My mum.

Ah, don't worry,

you didn't miss much.

[man burping] Yep

[man] You coming?

Grog's inside.

[man] I like your hat.

Winnie

Got yourself a bit of filly,

have ya?

[Winnie] Just quietly

Where's Steve?

Where do you think, love?

He's in the bloody ground.

What, didn't you know?

Carked it on the shithouse.

Brick one, of course.

Nothing cheap for

this bloody family.

Champers or tinnie?

Ah, it's all right.

I got ya.

You right?

You look a bit lost.

Making friends already.

Nice of you to join us.

You look like sh*t.

Attention, please!

Now! Hmm

Thank you all for coming

to mourn the passing

of Steve Sanders -

husband, father, legend.

If he hadn't been taken

already, I'd have married him,

not his son.

[smattering of laughter]

- Miserable old b*stard!

- [laughter]

It's true, Steve wasn't

given to smiling much,

but I know he'd be smiling now

because young Steve and I

are having a baby.

Surprise, my love.

f*cking oath!

Our first child.

Congratulations, Steve. You're

going to make a wonderful dad.

I've got to go

and have a whizz.

[liquid splashing]

[Steve moaning]

You're Steve?

Ah

Hello.

A few shakes,

then I'll be done.

[exhaling]

It's all true. I know

why you're here.

You're looking for a--

[Cheryl] Get away

from my husband.

[Steve] Whoa, whoa,

whoa, whoa.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,

whoa, whoa, whoa

[Steve exclaiming]

Oh, stop

Oh sweetheart,

you don't want to do that.

[g*n clicking]

[g*n clicking]

- [g*n clicking repeatedly]

- [Cheryl and Steve gasping]

[Cheryl] That's it.

- Triple Zero what's your emergency?

There's an Aborigine

in my house, with a g*n.

Yes. No, no, no, no.

Don't transfer me.

[Steve] What's this?

Coober Pedy Cup.

Ringer wanted me

to bring that to you.

Ringer!?

How do you know Ringer?

My Pop.

Mary's your mum?

How old are you?

Seventeen.

I think.

[Cheryl] Hello? We need

the police here now.

This is urgent.

We need them here now.

Put the phone down, Cheryl.

Did I tell you she's

going to hurt my husband?

I think something's--

Cheryl, put the phone down.

Steve! Who is this?

[Steve] Quiet!

Everyone, I would like

to introduce, aah

[whispering] Robyn.

Robyn! She's my daughter.

[people chuckling]

Alright, youse can all

f*ck off now.

[Cheryl] Well, that was

a f*cking sh*t show.

[cars accelerating away]

[horse neighing]

No, you can't feed him that.

Yeah, he's on a strict diet.

He's a stud. Aren't you, mate?

Ah, doesn't matter.

We're celebrating.

Not every day you

meet your dad, hey?

You're a cheating b*stard.

Yeah.

Is that you?

Huh, yeah.

How is she?

Good.

[Steve] Hmm

As soon as I clapped eyes

on your mother, Mary

I was a goner. Hmm

Nothing like your first love.

f*ck anyone who tries

to tell you different.

It's never the same again.

You know I come here

to sh**t you.

But you didn't, did ya?

[both chuckling]

Well, ah

Ruby?

Rosie?

Rowena?

[chuckling]

Well, pleased to meet ya.

Whatever your bloody name is.

[rattling]

[electrical spark]

Mum?

[Mick] Home sweet home,

hey, Bob?

Yeah

[Mick] What's with

all the statues?

Oh, I collect them.

[Robert] Oh well, look ah,

cheers. Appreciate the lift.

Yeah, you take care, won't you?

Ah, what are you doing?

I figured I'd walk you inside.

Ah, not necessary.

Nah, drove you all this way.

Might as well walk

you to your door.

Yeah, alright.

[man] Bob! Oh, oh

Come and give us a hug,

ya old bugger.

[laughing]

- Good to see you, old man.

- Oh, good to see you too.

[man] Hey darling, how are ya?

[Robert] Oh well, thanks again.

Sorry for the miscommunication

- taking off like that.

I was just, you know,

I was just really keen

to find my son.

Right. So if you see him,

you'll give us a call then?

Oh yes.

What was all that about?

[car starting]

Oh, the son got himself

in a bit of a bother

with the police.

Gidge? What? With the police?

What, what did he do?

Oh look, I'd love to talk.

I'll talk later, d*ck.

I've really got to take a sh*t.

[d*ck] Yeah, a bit of

thinking time. Yeah.

[d*ck] Hey, hey,

good to see you, Bob.

You too, d*ck.

- Really good to see you, mate.

- Yeah.

[door opening]

Hi, son.

Nice to see ya.

Where's that ah, little sheila

you've been

running around with?

Ah, she left.

Good.

Why is that lady dead?

Ah

I ah

I k*lled her.

How?

Oh

Religious ecstasy.

Did you get

angry with her?

Look, I k*lled her.

Yes.

But I don't really know how.

We were getting intimate

and then well, she put her

hand down there, you know,

and she slipped her finger up.

Well, I had one of my

spells and I lost control

and then I woke up,

and I found her like this.

We need to call the police.

No, no, no, no, no! No police.

God is judging me.

We need to deal with this -

you and I.

Just like old times, hey?

I don't know about this, Dad.

Will you just drop it

and help me?

You got to learn to work smart,

not hard, son.

[d*ck exclaiming] Look at this!

You brought a bit of the

desert back with you

- by the looks of it.

- [Robert] Yeah!

Gidge, hey, I didn't

know you were back.

- Hey

- Look at you, all grown up.

Oh, I picked some zucchinis.

Thought you might like 'em.

Hey! Big unit you are now,

aren't ya?

We're digging a hole?

I looked after this for ya,

now you're digging it up.

Yeah.

[d*ck] What for?

Ah, planting a lemon tree.

- Alright.

- [Robert] Yeah.

- So first the police.

- [Robert] Right.

Now you're digging

a f*cking hole.

- [Robert] Yeah.

- What are you really doing?

Oh

Gidge hit a dog.

- [d*ck] Oh no!

- Yeah.

- What kind?

- Bluey.

- What, a Heeler?

- Yep.

- Oh, poor bugger.

- I know.

Hit and run.

Oh!

[d*ck] You alright, mate?

What's going on?

[Robert] Oh no, I'm alright.

Just my back

playing up, you know.

[d*ck] I'll give you a hand,

mate. Let me have a go.

[Robert] No,

it's alright, d*ck.

[d*ck] No, come on.

You need a bloke.

- [d*ck] Come on.

- [Robert] Cheers.

I've been doing this

all my f*cking life.

Another thing I've been doing

is mowing the f*cking lawn.

[d*ck] I mean,

how big is this dog?

[Robert] Oh, you know.

[d*ck] I'll go and get

a bigger shovel.

[Robert] Yeah,

that's a good idea.

[door opening and closing]

Hey, now's our chance.

Let's do it!

Come on. She's not

going to bury herself.

Right. I'll grab the arms.

You grab the legs.

- [lock rattling]

- [Robert] Son?

[Robert] What? Gidge!

[rattling door]

Gidge, open the bloody door!

[knocking on door]

- Where's Mum?

- What?

Where - is - she?

[Robert] I don't know.

Why isn't she here?

[Robert] Oh God, how

would I bloody know?

You k*lled her.

[Robert] What?

[Gidge] For wanting a divorce.

[whispering] Oh, bloody hell.

[Gidge] You, you

m*rder*d her,

like you m*rder*d that lady.

- Gidge, open the bloody door.

- No!

[Gidge] I saw the

divorce papers.

Dad, I am not going

to let you out

until you tell me

what happened.

Alright, okay.

Yes.

She left me.

Look, Gidge,

I loved your mother.

I loved your mother, but she

didn't love me. She hurt me.

So I hurt her back.

I stole you.

You said

she didn't want me.

Gidge?

Where are you going?

Gidge, open the door.

[Gidge VO] Hi, um, Mr. Spider?

It's Gidge.

I was just wondering

if Robyn

if Robyn was still there?

Ah! I tell you what,

I will say one thing

for the old b*stard,

he did keep

a good wine cellar.

They say a glass a day

is good for your health.

[phone ringing]

[phone continues ringing]

I'll get it.

Ah, thanks, love.

[Steve] Hmm

Left-handed.

Hm?

[answer machine] You've

called the estate of

Cheryl and Steve-o,

leave a message. [beep]

[Gidge] Robyn?

It's um, it's Gidge.

Listen, things have,

well, they've gone bad

and I don't know what to do.

So I think this is

the end of the road.

I just wanted

to say I'm sorry.

Goodbye.

[beep]

["The Angel Of Death" by

Hank Williams playing on radio]

In the great book of John

you're warned of the day ♪

When you'll be laid

beneath the cold clay ♪

[woman on tape] Hello,

we're not here right now.

Just leave a message for

Gidge, Robert or myself

and we'll get back

to you soon. [beep]

[young Gidge on tape]

Hey Mum,

I'm sorry for

whatever I've done.

Please let me come home.

I just I just want to

hear your voice, Mum.

[older Gidge] Mum, I know

I haven't called in a while.

You should be ashamed

of yourself.

You call yourself a mother.

[beep]

Mum, I've

I've run away from Dad.

I actually met a girl.

Robyn.

That you're ready to meet

the Angel of Death ♪

[sobbing]

- [Steve] Close your eyes.

- Why?

'Cause I got something for ya.

Come on, close them.

Alright.

Put your hand out.

Be up early and

I'll take you riding.

Really?

Just me and you.

Oh, who was that, love?

- Wrong number.

- Ah, that's alright.

[Steve] Yeah

[Robyn VO] Ringer used to say,

distance makes the

heart grow fonder.

I was starting to like

my drop dead dad.

[c*ck g*n]

But you know what?

[g*nsh*t]

It's only a matter of time

until they f*ck up again.

Ah, f*ck!

- [dogs barking]

- [Robert shouting] Gidge!

["Ngurrapanya Tjayla" by

Isaac Yamma playing]