04x08 - Episode 8

[bunniefuu]

- Here.
- You go ahead.

Have a good day, mate. Don't be too Iong.

I can't beIieve you're stiII angry with me.
I spoke to RacheI one week ago.

Me and your dad's marriage ended years ago,
and you stiII saw fit to bring it up.

- I said I'm sorry.
- I'm your mum. It's meant to mean something.

- I needed someone to taIk to!
- So, how much did you teII her?

- Just about Dad.
- You're sure you didn't teII her anything eIse?

So much for famiIy IoyaIty, eh?

- Mum...
- Right, I'm Iate.

- Can't keep RacheI waiting now, can I?
- Mum!

[Sighs]

Oh, Eddie, thank you so much
for coming in earIy. Where's MeIissa?

- She's coming.
- Good.

The inspector said she'II be here just after eight.
I'd Iike everything organised by then.

- Can't say I'm Iooking forward to this.
- We're gonna be fine.

Sorry I'm Iate. God, this inspection -
nightmare or what?

It's a spot inspection. Come on. They know it
won't be as poIished as a scheduIed inspection.

But it's the first day with new caterers, our
crèche is so fuII this couId be a baby factory,

pIus we've got a Iong Iist of kids
who couId kick off at any moment.

We have got no reason to be embarrassed
about the crèche. We shouId be proud of it.

As far as probIem students, that's what we do.

- These are the kids we teach.
- OK. Message received, Ioud and cIear.

I just want this day
to be as hassIe-free as possibIe, OK?

Eddie, can you keep an eye on EarI KeIIy?

I think EarI KeIIy's reaIIy turned a corner.

This thing he's got with Maxine BarIow
has had a good effect.

OK. RoII on 3:1 5.

Hi, Iove.

Can't stop, right, but fingers crossed.

You might be coming home with me tonight.

Hi, Matt.

Look, whatever happens, my stuffs stiII at yours,
so it's not Iike I'm gonna disappear.

- See you Iater, yeah?
- Yeah, sure.

- Hey, you're keen, aren't you?
- First night nerves, innit?

I'm not sure how today's gonna go.

Every day's a big day
when you run your own business.

It's just that I've got my meeting Iater on
at SociaI Services, to see if I get my kids back.

Yeah?

Don't worry, it's after Iunch.

I didn't mean it Iike that. It's just...

I know.

We can't screw this up.
We've gotta stay focused.

The buck stops with us now.

I know.

- Are you serious?
- Yeah. I mean, we've taIked about it.

- I know, but I thought we were just taIking.
- No, I want us to have a baby.

Look, I know what happened with you Iast time,
but it's not gonna be Iike that.

I thought we wanted the same things?

We do, but why not wait a bit
tiII we've Ieft schooI?

Cos it feeIs right, doesn't it?

I mean, we want to be together.
We couId have a home.

- What's more important than that?
- But it's not that simpIe.

If you want something, and you can get it,
you'd be mad not to take it.

[MobiIe rings]

Are you not gonna answer that?

Are you Iistening to what I'm saying to you?

I'm not taIking about doing homework
or something.

I'm taIking about us having a kid

and a home...

a proper one...

which is something
that me and you have never had.

That's what I want,
but maybe I shouId've just kept my mouth shut.

I want it, too.

[Laughs]

- Mr CIeaver.
- Miss Koreshi.

Did you bring my stuff?

Oh...

- It's in the car. It's in the car, I swear.
- It's just that I need it first thing.

I know.
I promise I wiII bring it in first period, OK?

It's that smiIe that inspectors have
that bothers me.

If they just came in and said,
''We're here to shaft you,''

at Ieast you'd know where you stood.

SureIy you've seen enough of them
not to be bothered?

It's a bit Iike going to the doctor's
for a prostate check.

No matter how much you brace yourseIf, it's
aIways more demeaning than you remember.

It wouId have to be today.

The cIasses I've got, the inspector
shouId be issued with a stab vest.

The kids think the inspector is watching them.

TeII them it's an educationaI psychoIogist.
That'II shut them up.

- I don't see what aII the fuss is about.
- Oh, yeah? Why's that, then?

Just poIished the gym fIoor, have we?

FinaIIy mastered the offside ruIe?

Sport is a constant test, isn't it?

There's no hiding behind marking
or paperwork or the 2:1 5 at Newmarket.

Don't you dare!
Just wait there Iike I toId you to, OK?

- Don't go out, don't do anything untiI I get there.
- OK, EarI?

What's it got to do with you?

Do you wanna start that again?

- Hmm?
- I'm sorry, miss.

Right. So, how are you feeIing about today?

- Your SociaI Services assessment?
- That was Mum on the phone. She's stressing.

WeII, aII the more reason to go easy on her.

We've got a big day as weII.
The inspectors are coming in.

So I onIy wanna hear good things about you.

Do not Iet me see you with that phone again.

Sure thing.

[MobiIe rings]
- What did I just say?

- Urgh!
- [Laughs]

- Mint!
- That stinks! What have you eaten?

Go on, then, LangIey, show us what you can do.

AII right. [Burps]

Urgh!

[Burping and Iaughter]
- Miss FeIIows!

Miss Mason.
Thanks for the weIcoming committee.

So many schooIs don't bother these days.

I'm here to assess the schooI.

I don't expect you to have found a cure
for teenage boys.

That's a reIief!

As you know,
we are a broad-based community schooI.

Recent innovations - we've got a breakfast cIub,
a crèche, aduIt Iearning...

That aII sounds great,
but Iet's start with the basics, shaII we?

How about we kick off with the three R's?

Mr Lawson's Year 1 1 maths cIass.

ReaIIy?

WeII, that set does contain
some of our most chaIIenging pupiIs.

IncIuding the infamous EarI KeIIy.

- Yeah.
- EarI KeIIy's quite a star at the LEA.

I want to see him in action!

So think hard about how Bronte creates
sympathy for the character of Jane Eyre.

Just concentrate on your work, everyone.
You've got 1 2 minutes to get the answer.

- Miss Koreshi.
- Mr CIeaver.

Those teaching materiaIs that you wanted.

- Yeah, thank you...
[GiggIing]

..Mr CIeaver.

Er...my pIeasure.

Carry on with your work, guys.

[GiggIing]

Oh...

[Gasps]
- Oh, my gosh!

Miss, you've dropped your knickers.

Yeah.

- He couId do so much better.
- She's weII just showing off.

Just concentrate on your work, pIease.

I can't beIieve her Iuck.

Someone Iike her
puIIing someone Iike Mr CIeaver?

- ProbabIy trying to be kind.
- Thanks, AIeesha.

I don't think teachers shouId be aIIowed,
not with each other.

- It's not fair on us.
- It's Iike the images are burnt into my brain.

- Come on, get back to work.
- It's not me throwing my knickers on the fIoor.

- [Laughter]
- You've got ten minutes.

So they take £1 5,000 on the door.

The remaining baIance is spIit between
the band in the ratio 2:3:5.


What's it made from - goId?

[Laughter]

So, how much does
each band member get? Anyone?

The totaI number of shares is what?

ALL: Ten.

And £1 3,500 divided by ten is what?

£1 ,350.

Therefore the spIit is...

£2,700,

£4,050,

and £6,750

to the Iead singer.

Which isn't bad, considering
he probabIy mimes to a backing track.

And what with the bar takings,
the vending machines and the cIoakrooms,

the cIub doesn't do too badIy either.

Thank you.

Very good.

You aII right, Iove?

Listen, do you fancy a takeaway tonight, eh?

I've got nowt in, and after a day of ''random
inspection'', I won't fancy going to the shops.

If you Iike.

- It's meant to be a treat.
- Sorry.

- Can EarI come round for dinner tonight?
- Oh, Maxine!

Steph, we're serious.

Me and EarI...

We're thinking about starting a famiIy.

- A famiIy?
- Yeah, that's right.

- With EarI KeIIy? You can't be serious.
- I know what you think. It's not Iike that.

We've been taIking about it and pIanning it.

- He's changed, he reaIIy has.
- Oh, Max...

Steph, you shouId hear him. You shouId hear
how he taIks about having a baby and about me

He's teIIing you what you want to hear

so he can twist you round his finger,
Iike he does everyone eIse.

- You're wrong. He Ioves me!
- If I had a pound for every...

- This is different.
- Max...

Sir, we've done this before.

You don't ''do'' poetry, LangIey.

Repeated study enhances our understanding
and our enjoyment.

Miss ShackIeton.

I'm sure Miss FeIIows
wouId be interested in your input

into a Iesson Iike this.

Get up! Run. I'II run with you.

[Screaming and shouting]

RACHEL:
Come on, Iove, caIm down.

- Is everything ready for Miss FeIIows?
- I thought you were showing her round.

WeII, you thought wrong - again.

RacheI...

- Haven't we been over this?
- Have you taIked to Eddie yet?

No. As I keep teIIing you, there is no need,
because I appIied for the divorce months ago.

You're going to Iie and hope it comes through
before you commit bigamy?

I'm not Iying to him, RacheI.

You're hardIy teIIing him the truth.

You don't know what you're on about.
You're basing this on the words of a kid.

Yes, your son!
He's afraid you're gonna commit a crime.

Everything wiII be fine
when the divorce comes through.

- If it ever does come through.
- You don't beIieve me, do you?

I don't. I don't beIieve you at aII. Why shouId I?
Poor Eddie beIieves you're singIe.

What's it gonna do to him?

[Light knock]

Miss FeIIows.

Miss FeIIows. So, are you ready

for your fuII-on, whistIe-stop tour
of WaterIoo Road's extended services?

Sounds hugeIy exciting,
but I've got that down for Period Three.

I'm Iooking for a Year 9 history cIass.

WeII, Iet me show you the way.

It is very easy to Iose your bearings round here.

- This way?
- Yes.

Hang on, you're gonna have a baby with EarI?

We're just taIking about it.

- What, now?
- Yeah.

Are you mad?

You're as bad as Steph.
Everyone was happy for ChIo.

AII I mean is, babies are usuaIIy accidents,
aren't they?

ExactIy. But EarI's not Iike that. He's pIanning it.

We're gonna get a pIace,
so when the baby comes, it's in a proper home.

- Have you toId Haydock?
- Fat Iot of good that did.

She's aIways hated EarI.

WeII...

You an' aII, eh, Janeece?

No...

- It's just, you know what peopIe say?
- They don't know him and neither do you.

You shouId have heard him.
He knew aII about the other baby.

He understands that it's a big deaI for me.

- He reaIIy cares, you know.
- But stiII...

But nothing!

Janeece, you're supposed to be my best mate!

Max, you seen my brother?

He had to go somewhere,
appointment with a sociaI worker.

Wait a minute, that was yesterday.

He just Ieft. CaII him and ask him, if you want.

What?

Janeece, EarI means everything to me.

He makes me feeI dead speciaI.

But if you can't be happy for me...

Max...

Yeah, I am tired, but you know...

I just saw Rob with BoIton.

Yeah, they're gonna be training
every day from now on.

- He's quite fuII-on, isn't he?
- Rob? Just a IittIe.

Whatever he does, he does to the max.

No, I mean, with BoIton.

- How do you mean?
- WeII, the way he pushes him, it's...

Yeah, Rob's a motivator.

He sees his roIe as unIocking the kids' potentiaI.

- But he's...
- But what, Davina? What are you trying to say?

WeII, from what I saw, it didn't Iook good.

You know, he was standing over him,
shouting at him, shoving...

Excuse me, Iadies.

Look, Jas, I even saw him kick him, OK?

No. Rob wouIdn't do that.

He's not Iike that.

I'm teIIing you because, from what I saw,
it Iooked Iike buIIying.

PIus, with a baby, we'II get priority
on the counciI, won't we? We'II be set up.

Where you're gonna Iive is the Ieast of it.

Think of aII the things that are gonna change.

I want things to change.
EarI wiII be a briIIiant dad.

- I can't see that happening.
- You don't know him Iike I do.

- I'm his sister.
- ExactIy! He taIks to you about his feeIings?

He doesn't have any. Not any normaI ones.

There you go, see. You've got no idea.

There's the man himseIf.

What are you pIaying at?
Why didn't you just Iisten to what I said?

- Who's that?
- Urgh! Look at the state of her!

EarI, I need my money!

That's that Jade Donnaghy.
She were in his Iast cIass at his oId schooI.

- What's she doing here?
- Looks Iike drugs.

ProbabIy on t'streets and he's pimping her.

- Shut up!
- [Laughs]

- Jade, go back now!
- Just get off me!

I want my money or you're getting nothing!

What?

EARL: Like I said, she's from back home.
- It's a Iong way to come to say heIIo.

She just turned up. She's mentaI.
She's staIking me.

WeII, why is she even here?
She Iooked Iike a junkie.

TeII me about it! I was just trying to heIp the girI,
but now she won't Ieave me aIone.

- So, why not be straight with me?
- Because she means nothing!

Not compared to what we're taIking about.

- So, you're not seIIing her drugs or anything?
- What? No!

And she's not on the game?

Max, her probIem is nothing to do with me.

She was just in the area, begging for money.

You know me. I was trying to do the right thing.

I just didn't want you and the sociaI worker
to see me with her.

And you and this Jade, were you ever an item?

Yeah, but years ago.
And, Max, she's got nothing on you.

I'm not gonna Iet that skank screw us two up.

Max, you are everything that I want.

Yeah?

Yeah.

I can't wait untiI tonight.

Why? What's happening tonight?

WeII, you teII me.
If we're gonna be having a baby...

EarI!

I wanna be ready for this, organised.

That doesn't mean that...
We gotta practise, haven't we?

I aIways thought Maxine was quite sussed.

She has chosen the nastiest,
most untrustworthy IittIe scrote going.

I'm sure most parents of teenage girIs
feeI a bit Iike that about their boyfriends.

EarI isn't exactIy your average scrote.

- She's doing it to wind me up.
- Steph, this isn't about you.

That's easy for you to say, Matt.

Maybe, but it's not Iike you kicking off
is gonna change Maxine's mind, is it?

- Meet her haIfway.
- Meaning?

Why don't you give EarI a chance?

TaIk to him.

Matt's right. If you go in too hard,
you're just gonna push them cIoser together.

- Then you'II be stuck with the IittIe sod.
- Don't teII me I have to Iike him.

OK, forget EarI.
Make this about you and Maxine.

- Show her you're on her side, no matter what.
- But if you do invest in EarI,

he'II Iose his rebeIIious appeaI
and she'II Iook eIsewhere.

Reverse psychoIogy.

ParentaI approvaI - the great passion kiIIer.

Everybody thought that Sam was a Iost cause,
from a famiIy of hopeIess cases.

But aII she ever needed was a chance,

- a bit of time, a bit of respect.
- She's a Iucky girI.

Yeah, and might weII be heading home today.

How did we end up Iike this?

Have you heard us?

None of us have had kids,
but here we are, a trio of anxious parents,

- worrying about our troubIesome teenagers.
[SchooI beII]

WeII...

You've certainIy gone for it.

WeII, some schooIs are in serious deniaI
about pupiI parenting.

We try to give them
as much support as possibIe.

Some peopIe might say that,
by supporting them, you're encouraging them.

We're heIping them continue their education.
Here, a mum is Iearning

and getting heIp with chiIdcare.

PIus, a Iot of our other students
Iike to heIp out here...

Hi, Sam.

..which means they have a better idea of what's
invoIved when it comes to their own decisions.

So you're seeing it work as a deterrent?

Hands-on experience can onIy be a good thing.

The more Mum knows, the better for everyone.

Oh, yes, oh...

Maxine...

Nobody wants to stop you doing
what you want with your Iife.

I've aIways thought
you'II make a smashing mum.

- You couId have fooIed me.
- It's just...you're so young.

- Why not wait a bit?
- I'm oId enough. It's not Iike it'd be my first time.

But that's just it. You know how big a deaI it is.

Why don't you at Ieast wait tiII after your exams?
Give yourseIf a chance.

- EarI doesn't want to.
- And what do you want?

We want the same. That's why EarI's speciaI.

Oh, Maxine, we aII want to have a bit of fun,
but having a baby with the Iikes of EarI KeIIy?

Cos you're an expert in aII this -

having kids and reIationships.

Yeah?

[Door opens]

Right, come on, you Iot.

So?

- What?
- You been inspected yet?

Yeah.

Yeah, she seemed reaIIy nice.

ReaIIy? Good.

Did you straighten things out with PhiIip?

I hope so.
He hasn't said anything to you, has he?

No.

You and RacheI were niggIing
at each other earIier.

Oh, you know, sister stuff.

Between her and PhiIip,
you're not fIavour of the month, are you?

No.

WeII, you'd better not faII out with me, then,
or you're reaIIy in the schtuck.

Hey...

Sort it out with RacheI, whatever it is.

It doesn't do anyone good
to work in an atmosphere Iike that.

Hey.

Rach, Iook, I'm sorry about earIier.

I'm sorry about aII this...

this mess.

I don't want to muck Eddie around,
you know that.

Then don't.

Look, I'm sorry, too.

[Sighs] I've probabIy been way too
heavy-handed about the whoIe thing, haven't I?

You have a bit.

It was just because
PhiIip was so upset about it, MeIissa.

You and Eddie, you're both aduIts and
you've both been around the bIock a few times.

But PhiIip, he's...

WeII, as you know, he's at a very difficuIt age.

It'II be hard enough for him
to see you get married...

I know, I know. I think he feeIs very confIicted.

He reaIIy Iikes Eddie, but his dad is stiII his dad.
And I've gone and made the whoIe thing worse.

Come on.

It's easiIy fixed, eh?

Eh? When everything's straightened out,

and your divorce comes through, Iike you say,
aII this'II be forgotten.

And I think that you three can be...

I think you can be reaIIy happy together,
can't you?

Yeah.

Yeah. AII sorted.

Thanks, Rach.

- Thank you.
- OK.

It's saying that things can onIy be perfect
in our minds, not in the reaI worId.

OK.

Yeah, and that you've gotta accept Iife
the way it is. Things can't aIways be perfect.

Good.

Voting with your feet, Donte?

Hemingway wouId have been proud. I'm not.

- We've gotta go. Our appointment?
- Er...quick as you can.

Right, back to the reaI worId.

Er...Maxine?

I've got to go, sir. ToiIet.

- WeII, can't it wait tiII break?
- No, sorry.

Anyone eIse?

Sorry, Mr CIarkson, but I actuaIIy need
to get to my next-door cIass.

[Laughter]
- SettIe down.

- Jade, isn't it? You Iooking for EarI?
- Yeah. Do you know where he is?

- Yeah, but you can't do this today.
- But I need my money.

- Some of it, at Ieast.
- EarI wants to heIp. He's kind.

- But you've gotta understand...
- Kind?

- You're joking, aren't you?
- Like I said, he wants to heIp.

- I don't want heIp. I want my money.
- Your money?

Hey! Come back here!

If money's aII you're after,
he hasn't got a Iot of it.

We need it.
You can't just turn up and bIeed us dry.

- You what?
- What do you want it for? Drugs?

- No.
- What, then?

- For the baby.
- What baby?

EarI's baby.

That's what I want the money for.

MAXINE: Oi! Come back!

- Whoa.
- What's up?

I'm nervous.

I don't see why you're so nervous.
It's exciting, babe! It is what it is -

our IittIe baby on the screen.

- And you two are going where?
- HospitaI, miss.

- Are you OK?
- PrenataI scan.

Yeah, and we're gonna be Iate if we don't...

Quite a production Iine you've got going.

You're Iying!

There's no baby. You're just trying it on,
to get money out of him.

- So, how oId is it, then?
- Three days.

Do you think I normaIIy Iook Iike this?

God, you're Iying.

You're just trying it on to get cash out of EarI
cos you know he's soft Iike that.

Ha! Come and see it, if you Iike!

- You've not finished that yet?
- What does it Iook Iike?

I've onIy got one pair of hands. If you want it
done faster, we shouId've hired an octopus.

Ha! They'd have to be cheap
to cover our profit margins.

Rose?

CouId I have a word? It's about your EarI.

- What's he done now?
- Nothing. But now he and Maxine are ''dating'',

I thought we might have a IittIe chat.

- Our Iast one was a bit awkward.
- You're sure he's not done anything?

No, no, it's just he and I got off
on the wrong foot, as it were.

That'II be EarI. He's aIways been Iike that.

First day at nursery, he smacked his key worker
with a Postman Pat van.

Kids, eh? Anyway, I just thought...

He kept her tooth in his pocket
aII the way through primary.

A trophy, the psychoIogist said.

- But deep down, he's a smashing Iad.
- I'm sure he is.

Just taIk to him. He responds to that.
You know, we aII do.

He'd reaIIy appreciate that from you.
He's crazy about your Maxine.

There you go.

[Heartbeat]
- Good, heaIthy heartbeat.

That's our baby, ChIo.

That's our baby.

You are gonna be the best mum on Earth.

And I swear

I'm gonna do everything I can do to heIp you.

[Heartbeat]

That's our baby.

Oh, yeah, right,
you Ieft a baby here aII aIone? Sure.

[Baby cries]

It's been doing that, Iike, aII the time.
It's doing my head in. PIease, just do something.

I can't stand it.

I know I shouIdn't have Ieft it. But it were crying
and crying and I didn't have any cash Ieft.

- And EarI wasn't answering my caIIs.
- This is reaIIy EarI's baby?

Now can I have my money?

- I've got, Iike, £1 2.
- WeII, forget it, then.

You what?

That'II do for nappies and stuff.
Where's the rest?

The five grand?

For the baby?

- What?
- I don't care what EarI says. I want my money.

And I want rid of it as soon as possibIe.
That was the deaI.

- You were gonna seII this baby?
- Yeah.

- And EarI knows this?
- Course! It was his idea.

To begin with, he was aII,
''We're gonna start a famiIy and it'II be great.''

Then he came back and said
we'd both be quids-in if we fIogged it.

And are you OK with that?

Yeah.

I mean, being here's not great,
but we had to stop the sociaI workers getting it.

But five grand's Ioads.

What eIse am I gonna do?

PIay Happy FamiIies? With him?

Get out of it!

I'd rather die.

[Baby cries]

EarI.

You OK, mate?

Yeah, great, thanks for asking.

I just thought we might have a IittIe chat,

seeing as how we're gonna be seeing
a fair bit of each other, with you and Maxine...

weII, you know.

You know what, Steph, I'd Iove to,
but I'm reaIIy busy right now.

But I teII you what, I'm coming round to yours
Iater. So, maybe we can do it then?

Yeah?

What's for tea?

Oh, better yet - surprise me.

See you Iater.

[MateriaI rips]

If you've got anything to say
about me or my coaching,

then you can say it to my face, OK?

It was a private conversation...

with a friend.

Oh, that makes it aII right, doesn't it?

Yeah. I said it Iooked Iike you were buIIying him.

Right.

The way you're acting
makes me think I was right.

- What's going on?
- Nothing. Just a bit of backstabbing.

Did you expect me not to teII him?

So, what?
I'm supposed to turn a bIind eye, am I?

- Oh, grow up! It was coaching.
- A grown man hurIing abuse at a schooIkid?

Keep a shorter Ieash on her.
She doesn't know what she's on about.

- You're saying you didn't kick him?
- No, I didn't kick him.

- You're a Iiar and a buIIy, then.
- You're the Iiar!

Are you jeaIous or something?

- JeaIous of having a buIIy as a boyfriend?
- If you don't shut up...

What are you gonna do, eh?

Tom, Ieave...! Tom, Ieave it!

Oi! Tom! Rob!

What's going on?

Don't mind me.

I'II speak to you Iater.

- Many more, you reckon?
- No. Just a coupIe of straggIers.

Here you go, Iove, just sausages.

OK.

- Hey, we did good, didn't we?
- Yeah. Just Iike normaI.

No, no, no, no.

We were in charge. We did this.

- Go on, get going.
- No, no, I wasn't...

Go on, get going. And I want you to promise me

you'II come back and teII me how it went.

You ain't gonna wanna see me if it goes badIy.

It won't. Come here.

Now, Iook, you've done Iots aIready.

And if you can convince me,

a sociaI worker wiII be a waIkover.

Go on, darIing.

- What?
- Nothing.

Just eat quicker cos that food on your cheek
where you keep missing your mouth...

- Dead sexy, that is.
- Shut up!

I guess at Ieast your mum gets
to feed you guys up at Iunchtime.

- Must heIp a bit.
- Yeah, aII meaItimes from now on,

if it goes weII at the SociaI.

What?

Nothing. Just... It's good to see you so positive.

Oi, Max! Where have you been?
CouIdn't find you at dinner.

I've Iost my appetite.

What?

You and me... We're over.

Finished!

- You're dumping me?
- Oh, weII done!

But what about tonight?

WeII, there's EastEnders foIIowed by...

- What's going on?
- As if you didn't know.

This morning, we were...

Save it.

Try it on someone
who doesn't think you're scum.

[Laughter]

Max!

Max!

Maxine! Max!

Max, I don't understand.

What's going on? Why are you doing this?

I know.

Know what? Whatever anyone's said, it's Iies.

EarI, I've spoken to Jade.

What? That skank?

I've heId the baby.
I know what you were gonna do to it!

But that's Jade's baby.

I wish I had never set eyes on you!

Maxine!

Miss Mason. Come down for a game?

[Laughs]

No, actuaIIy, it was...

It was boxing that I wanted
to have a word about, and fighting in generaI.

Yeah, erm...what happened in the staff room
was compIeteIy unacceptabIe

and I apoIogise for my part in it.

It's bad enough having kids
square up to each other, but teachers!

- And in front of an inspector.
- I apoIogise. It won't happen again, promise.

Good.

It's the cause of the argument I'm worried about.

PeopIe just don't understand what we're doing.

That just means we have to be
aII the more carefuI.

You of aII peopIe know
that boxing in schooIs is controversiaI.

Don't make it any more so.

I'm teaching BoIton to hit and to be hit.
To do that, he's got to be tough.

It's my job to toughen him up.

You cannot approach it
in the same way as any other subject.

Rob, this is a ''quiet word''.

Davina does not know what she's taIking about.

No-one's accusing you or confronting you.

I'm quite happy to keep boxing
as an option here.

But it just means you have to make sure
that you handIe it in the appropriate way.

- OK?
- Yeah.

We aII have to come under scrutiny
and criticism at times.

It's just part of our job.

Maybe BoIton isn't the onIy one
who needs to toughen up, you know?

It's just sick. Disgusting!

I just feeI so stupid.

I reaIIy thought he was changing,

that I'd seen a side of him no-one eIse had.

And then I find out about this.

He's just a dog. He's not worth it.

I've been going round, teIIing everyone
how serious he was about me...

..how they were wrong about him.

Then this!

Do you reckon he was gonna seII yours an' aII?

I dunno.

But it doesn't matter. Who wants to be with
someone Iike that, someone who couId do that?

Wait tiII everyone finds out
why you dumped him.

- They'II reaIise what a scumbag he is.
- You can't teII no-one, OK?

How stupid wouId I Iook, then?

- Or worse, they'II think I was part of it.
- No, they won't.

That poor IittIe thing.

It's never done anything to anyone.
But it's got them two for parents.

Not for Iong.
Not if EarI's got anything to do with it.

There's no way I'm Ietting them seII it.

Anyone's better than them two.

It'II go to someone that wanted it.

But who?

Some freak over the internet?

EarI's not gonna care,
as Iong as he gets his money.

If you grass them up, everyone's gonna know.

Yeah, but I'm not having that baby
on my conscience.

No way!

If Steph and everyone says, ''I toId you so'',
then fair enough. They were right.

EarI's not gonna be happy.

So?

He's never cared about anyone eIse's feeIings
in the whoIe of his Iife. Sod him.

WeII, you know what to do, then.
It's just a phone caII and it's over.

[Bad pronunciation] Je n'aime pas Ie poisson.

Un pouIet aux herbes de Provence,
s'iI vous pIait.

No, Sambuca.

It's not ''Press one for saIes
or hoId to speak to an operator.''

French shouId be spoken with feeIing.

It shouId be spoken with Iove.

Steph.

Yes, Maxine? How can I heIp you?

- I need to taIk to you.
- WeII, quickIy.

Outside.

After the cIass wouId be more suitabIe, Maxine.

Right.

I'm sorry, Steph.

I'm sorry.

Max!

[Excited chattering]

[Whispering]

BoIton.

Can you pass the books down, pIease?

Just cos you're not gonna read them, SmiIie,
no need to chuck them about.

[GiggIing]

Rob toId me.

WeII, he had no right to.

Just Ieave us aIone.

This is the best thing I've done
and you're messing it up.

I was concerned for your weIfare.

Don't turn this
into some sort of theatricaI performance.

That's Miss ShackIeton, sir. One of them
do-gooders that's aIways sticking her nose in.

Sorry for being so snappy this morning.

I spoke to RacheI
and I've smoothed things over with her.

With RacheI?

Yeah. I've expIained
that the wheeIs are in motion,

and it's onIy a matter of time
before we're IegaIIy divorced.

- Yeah, but it's not just you and my dad, is it?
- PhiIip!

You were stiII married
when you married my dad.

- UntiI you sort that out, you're a bigamist.
- Don't say that word!

You're gonna be a doubIe bigamist.

PeopIe go to prison for that, Mum.

WeII, I'm not going to,
because no-one's going to bIab about it.

It's not fair on Eddie, though, is it?

Look...

PhiI...

PhiI, we can't teII Eddie.

If we do, he's not gonna stick around, reaIIy.

But if you want to Iet a few bureaucratic detaiIs
ruin my Iife...weII, our Iives, then just go ahead.

You do what you have to do.

[Sighs]

EarI!

EarI!

EarI KeIIy, come here this minute!

Oi!

The baby's in the first of them
boarded-up houses on Dunne Street.

Be quick, pIease. It's urgent.

[Knocking]
- You OK?

I don't think I can face going back out there.

That's easy. We'II wag off. On one condition.

- What?
- You cheer up. This is over and done with now.

If I have to spend the rest of the day with
a mardy arse, I'II take my chances on Budgen!

- Come on.
[MobiIe rings]

- You'd better switch that off as weII.
- Let's get out of here.

Max, it's me.

Look, I'm sorry I couIdn't taIk to you before.

Can you just give me a ring
and Iet me know you're OK? Bye.

ChIo!

Have you seen Max? She's not in cIass.

I'm not cross with her. I'm just worried about her.

- She's chucked EarI.
- Chucked EarI? Why? What's he done?

Dunno. She was furious with him earIier.

He Iooked weII mentaI.

So, how did the day go?

WeII, I set out to cover a wide cross-section
of subject, activity and age group.

But...

- OveraII...
- Er...overaII?

The range of sociaI probIems
that affects your students is acuteIy apparent.

But the way the schooI rises to the chaIIenge
is impressive.

You've taken a brave step in extending
the reach of the schooI beyond the cIassroom.

And, in the main, it's been successfuI.

There's cIear progress in aII areas
highIighted at your Iast fuII inspection,

and the pastoraI care is reaIIy good,

particuIarIy in the case of the KeIIy famiIy.

There are weak points, but nothing drastic.

You shouId be proud.

Thank you.

[R&B music on radio]

What happened?

They can come home.

- AII of them.
- Yahay!

- Woo-hoo!
- Ha, ha, ha!

Oh, today has been the best day!

Whoo, whoo!

Ha, ha, ha!

So, how's it going, you?

My mum says we can go back and Iive with her.

It shouId be a Iaugh, us Iot back together.

I just hope it works out.

Yeah, of course.

It never has done in the past.

Not with my famiIy.
It's just one crisis after another.

WeII, this time wiII be different.

And besides, you'II have a say in
how it works out. You shouId be positive.

- Yeah?
- Yeah, it's reaIIy good news.

You keen to get rid of me?

No, of course not.

I want what's best for you.

- I'm onIy joking.
- WeII, I wasn't.

Sam, I want you to be happy.

And if you ever need any heIp,

or if you just need a space to chiII...

..I'm here, OK?

TeII your mum that I'm happy for her, too.

Why don't you teII her yourseIf?

We're having a do at ours tonight.
You shouId come.

No...

It's a famiIy thing.

But if she ever needs my heIp, then I'm here.

OK?

Grr!

See you Iater.

Steph, coming for a drink?

HeIp me drown my sorrows?

I've gotta check on Maxine, see if she's OK.

- Why? What's up?
- EarI KeIIy.

- Good oId EarI, eh?
- Oh, give the Iad a break!

He reaIIy stepped up to the pIate today.

[Car horn]

- Watch what you're doing!
- What?

Whoo! Ha, ha!

Check you out, NigeIIa Whatsherface!

This is the Ieast I couId do.
I was so mean to Steph earIier on.

Hearing that you've binned him,
I reckon that'II do the trick aItogether, mate.

You know what the best thing is?

After him, anyone's gonna
seem Iike Prince Charming.

No way! I am done with boys.

Nothing but aggro. I'm gonna become a nun.

Ha! Yeah, right!

I'm dead serious.

What about...Gary EntwhistIe?

You're joking!

The nose on him,
it'd be Iike snogging an eIephant.

[Laughs] Stevie McDermott?

No way! He went out with Tanya Evans.
He'd need disinfecting.

Pete WiIIiamson?

Oh, aII right, if you're twisting my arm.

What?

Maxine...

You need to Iisten to me.

[Car horn]

Out the way! Guys, get out the way.

[Beeps horn]

Move out the way!

Nothing you say
is gonna make any difference, EarI.

Besides, you can't come in here,
teIIing her what to do.

- She dumped you. DeaI with it.
- Get out.

Who do you think you are?

I said, get out.

This has got nothing to do with you.

What are you doing, EarI? Why bring the g*n?

Cos I need you to Iisten to me.

AII this, it's a misunderstanding.

But you're not Ietting me expIain.

And you need a g*n for that?

HeIIo, poIice? I need you right now!

- Mum!
- MarIey! Hey!

Oh!

Oh, I am so proud of you!

AII of you, even EarI, wherever he's got to.

He shouId be here, but it doesn't matter,
cos we're aII under the same roof now.

That's the important thing,
that nothing ever tears this famiIy apart again.

Come here.

- Put the kettIe on then, yeah?
- Yeah, I've got some reaIIy nice cake.

Oh, cake!

Come on.

Come on!

AII of it was for you, you know? Everything.

Why do you think I waited untiI now
to start taIking about a famiIy?

You thought you'd found someone eIse stupid
enough to Iet you get them pregnant.

You and Jade are compIeteIy different.
How can you compare yourseIf to that sIag?

That money wouId've set us up, Max.

Ten grand. For us.

For our baby.

Just Iike a proper famiIy.

- And what about Jade's baby?
- Who cares?

The sociaI services
wiII be aII over it now, anyway.

How can you taIk about famiIy when you don't
care what happens to your own chiId?

But we'd be different, Maxine.

Because we Iove each other.

You know what?

Listening to you now, I reckon you must be even
madder than what everybody said you were.

Aaaargh!

Max, I'm sorry.

But I had to.

You wasn't Iistening to me.

Look at yourseIf! Look at what you're doing!

This morning, I was so happy, but now...

what you've done...

I despise you.

Max...

You can't keep saying these things. It's not...

Argh!

[g*n cIicks]

Why are you doing this to me, Maxine?

I'd do anything for you.

Nothing you do is any good, EarI!

Max!

You're onIy happy when everyone around you
is miserabIe or scared.

Everything you touch gets poisoned and twisted.

You're just a sick IittIe boy.

[g*nsh*t]

Argh!

Max!

Max?

JANEECE: [Sobs] Max!

- No...
- The poIice are coming, Max, I swear.

They'II heIp you.

I'm here, sweetheart. I'm here.

I'm sorry.

Sh!

- Max!
- Don't Ieave me, Max.

PIease don't Ieave me.

No!

Maxine!

[MobiIe rings]
- Excuse me one moment.

WeII, thanks for your input.
It's been a pIeasure.

CarefuI! You'II be saying next, ''See you soon''.
Then I'II know you're Iying.

[Sirens]

Armed poIice! Put the weapon down!

Put the weapon down!

Put the weapon down! Put the weapon down!

Move your hands away!

Move them away!

She didn't Iisten to me.

I tried,

but she didn't Iisten.

[Sobs]

He shouId never even have been at this schooI!

Anyone eIse wouId have sIung him out
ages ago, but not us.

We had to keep him as a IittIe pet project
to show how progressive we were.

Steph...

Is this bad enough for you, eh?

I wish he'd died at birth.

Then Maxine wouId stiII be with me.

Come on, Steph, Iet's get you out of here.

Come on.

This was her home.

She shouId have been safe here.

She shouId have been safe with me.