01x02 - A Quack in the Quarks

[bunniefuu]

And, to cap off my truly stupendous

weekend, I've infiltrated a secret spy

grin... ... and are missing sick

evildoers!

Thus, saving at me agers once again,

thanks to my invincible heroics and

good-natured party-mallard personality.

HuhHuhOh,

sorry, Babs. This other silence startled

me.

Don't you think they're laid on a little

thick plucky?Unless I pick the plot or

anything, but someday, all that

bragging's gonna get you in a lot of

trouble. Oh, relax, guys.

Speeches have to be colorful, don't they?

Well, what have we-- I'll say, what have

we here?

Meet Frank and Ollie, new transfer

students who need to get acquainted with

an university. Glad to have you,

kids. Whereabouts do you come from,

anyway?

Uh-huhUh, cute little types, but

I think they're about half a quart low.

Alright, which one... I say, which one of

you like to show Frank and Ollie around?

Luda Hersh and he Tudors are my

speciality, sir! Nobody's here qualified.

Everything in my life has led up to this

moment. Deep sticks the sermon, son. Just

go show 'em the ropes.

Phew! That duck spits out more words than

a dictionary in a garbage disposal. Uh,

speaking of garbage... What?Who wrote the

day script?Be nice!

This is the school lab. Let me know if

I'm getting too technical for you.

Of course, advanced chemistry is a snap

for someone of my high IQ. A little of

this, a dash of that. It's really very

simple when you're a genius.

Ah, the miracles of science.

Mmm. Root beer.

And finally, here's our hallowed athletic

field. Scene of many record-breaking

performances by yours truly.

Ah, yes. Too bad you couldn't see in

action. The picture of grace since I

planted the old pole!

Hey, where's Barky?Isn't he gonna walk

home with us?Well, I don't know. Old

Motormouse probably still on his tour

with those new students. I don't know.

Even when a Plucky's tours wouldn't last

this long.

Well, not too shabby, huh, guys?What do

you think?We think you're perfect!

Our planet sent us to bring back the

bravest... Strongest and fastest

earthling alive. And you're it!

Planet Earthling?Ohh Now wait a minute!

So, students?Some transfer?

What's before an exchange, students?Maybe

in France?We apologize for tricking you,

Blackie. But y'all are only hope. Our

people lack curvage. We need a brave

leader, like you.

Well, when you put it that way, I guess I

do fit the bell, don't I?

Fellow citizens, meet our new

leader, Cluckie Duck!

I never realized aliens had such

impeccable taste.

Oh, the elders will be pleased with that,

for finding such a brave warrior to save

a plant. Yes, and it's gonna take

all the bravery plus he has to conquer

the evil space tyrant Duck Avader.

The Duck has how much?Grossiness. I

don't know, but that's what I hear. With

or without voice. Where?That

can't be right. He's ready with a star.

Get my agent on the phone. Ready on the

set, the places, people. Come on, I'll

slay the cameras, he's rolling. A quack

in the quacks! A tool take tool!

And action. Plus, he's been ducknapped by

spacemen. Quick, leave me in the prop

departments. Right now, you got it.

Wherever you are, Plucky, old buddy, hang

on to your feathers. We'll find

him! Perfect, Plucky. These hero pets are

merely to prove to the planet Elders that

you qualify as our new leader.

Patience, folks. We guarantee this

urging will measure up. Next first, how

are you at weightlifting?

You shouldn't.

I'm the best darn weightlifter in the

universe. That does it. We've seen

enough. Oh, I'm so glad. I

don't understand. Chucky said he

was the best. Guys, take him

away!

Welsh of all time! What color is my limo?

And where are we going?Uh, you don't have

to

know.

Keep looking, guys. It's in here

somewhere. Buster, it's over here! I

found it!

Great. All right, everybody. Stand clear!

Oh... Ahh, boy! Prepare to

blast off! Aye, aye, Cap'n!

Ignition?

Sorry you can't come with us, elders,

but, uh, I'll bring you a souvenir, hmm

Oh, why, elders, please, me

questioner! I know, we serve let

you perform amazing feats. Then you

shouldn't mind joining him. on his

ultimate chance to prove themselves.

Hey, is this any way to treat a guest?

This sure better be good. I'm a busy

leader, you know. Ah, my royal beanbag.

Perfect for napping. No Plaque,

that's... Jakarta, play Plaque. Plaque,

Jakarta.

Don't worry, I won't. It's the chicken to

me. Oh,

no. Who's here?Who?And there's the one

that corrupts this. Who?

It's...

Who dares stand in Darth Vader's way of

destroying Quiladex?Oh,

Funky Ducks are a great leader! Go

on, Clucky! Show 'em who is boss!

Yeah, okay, sure! It doesn't look so

scary to me!

Is it suddenly hot in here, or is it just

me?Remember, in space,

no one can hear you quank. And he stops,

outer space is bigger than I thought. How

are we ever gonna find Plucky?How?

I'm glad you asked. With the help of our

trusty ethnic computer and one of

Plucky's feathers, retrieved conveniently

from the scene of the abduction.

Computer, find this duck!

Uh-oh, you're in the back, but what he

said was tickling the computer. That's

who we're explaining the block, Blake.

Get out of control!

You know, I've always been curious. How

come we call you fellow Stormtroopers?

I have to ask. We know you're allowing

yourself to be captured just to lull Duck

Beder into a false sense of security. But

don't you think it's time you walloped

him?Silence! Our intercalactic

zapper whale will soon blast planet X

into goat cheese! But first, we'll test

it on you!

I'm warning you, wise guy! You better

think twice before you test anything onme!

Because I do lousy on tests.

Soon you will be turned into goat cheese,

you foolish hero, you. Any last

words, doomed one?Yes, I'm

allergic to goat cheese.

Oh,

do I have to do everything myself?

Follow him!

Claw, claw, claw!

Pecky, why did you tell us that you were

the best on the earth?Hey, guys. I was

just having a little fun. I didn't think

it'd hurt anything. But you're fibbed.

None of that was true. Now we'll

be destroyed by the greatest troops.

Say who?This is one duck who's not

running another. Stop!

Well, maybe just a few more steps. Oh,

holy ducky! I

can't hold a bit on my

shoulder! Any bright ideas?

Well, it's so crazy, it just might work!

ohh

Onion!

So far so good. Now to figure out where

we are.

Lucky's aboard that ship. Now

we're going out. Spaceship

home!

Stay with the ship, Captain. I'll call up

to find travel. Remember, Babs, we're

parked in age five.

I think we lost him. Is this thing on?

Attention, all Stormtroopers! Two

minutes till we destroy Paradox!

Our product... it's doomed.

Baloney. You're not gonna give up now,

are ya?But we can never win against

Evader!

Never say never! Nobody can beat you

except you! Let the Force be your

umbrella! If you believe you can do it,

you can do it! And I know you have what

it takes to beat these fools!Ready?

You bet! Now get in there and get tough.

Remember, a stitch inclined says a lot of

embarrassment. You can lead a horse to

water, you know, but a pencil must be the

lead. When the going gets tough, this

stuff goes bye-bye. Yeah! Come on,

Darth Vader! What a skihead! Yeah! Yeah

Lucky. Huh

Hey, guys, hold it! Stop!

Buster, Babs! Oh boy, I'm glad to

see you. A whole planet's about to be

destroyed. What was this?The rehearsal?

Captain, we've got trouble out here. Help

us quick! Coming, Buster.

DI?You're enough, Buster, but how

did you... Come

quick! I also do magic

tweaks, like making pigs disappear.

You have been second known. Ten seconds

until we disqualify his ex! Walk that

way on top! Gee, good thing I always

carry the can of this with me. Don't you

wish everybody did?Five,

four, three, two,

one... Fire! Oh,

blast like the fire!

Huh I'd like to see that Claude Vader

stop us now!Be

careful what you wish for, Mallard. See,

has anyone ever told you you smell

exactly like 30-weight motor oil?

Oh, now you're sure, huhSteam iron breath?

Very perceptive, but you are going to

cheer me up just by standing on that

platform. Uh, thanks, but no thanks,

Helmut Head. We won't do it, and you

can't lick us!

Oh, can we?Canon! The

platform or the pig, it's your decision.

Well, I don't know. That platform's

pretty nice. The pig works cheap. You

know, I'm getting double scale for this

episode. You what?Well... We're

thinking! We're thinking!

Okay, the platform! I

knew you'd come around.

Let the horse hear your umbrella.

Uh, never say never.

Nah, never show too good anything bad,

not even your tongue. That's it! Hey,

we fell, hold still!

I've been flamed! Were we?

And for saving our beloved Planet X, we

proclaim you, Frank and Ollie, our new

leaders. And we're history majors.

Huh-huh. He should

come. He should go, I guess. Rocky, we

couldn't have gone it without you. Well,

while I did pick the best duck for the

job after all. Aww, shucks.

Well, it's nothing I haven't done before.

You know, that reminds me of the time

I'm... Hey, if

I'm lying, may a leisure strike me!