01x03 - Come Back, All is Forgiven

[bunniefuu]

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every time I look at

you I'm so glad that you're the

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one I've been growing closer

to as the years have come and

gone sharing for good or

ill hardly a day

aart older out side but still

young

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and morning Mrs Kia morning Barbara what

is it this time sugar milk or bread oh

I'm not borrowing I'm delivering post

card came to us by mistake oh T I like

getting letters and cards I'll save it

to read later when I'm having me tea

it's from your David and Sheila from

meorc uh they say the weather's Sunny

the hotel's nice oh and they hope you're

very well you might as well have it

back sorry I read it before I found out

it wasn't for us it was posted a

fortnite ago well that was a waste of a

stamp why they came back last

night how's Mr Coler oh in one of his

moods oh dear I don't know what's the

matter with him lately he's that Moody

and irritable he needs a stimulus yes

like a kick up the

backside speak of the devil morning Mr

Kia we've had a card from our

David how are you feeling terrible you

look it why haven't you put your tie on

what's the

point any tea yes they've got tons of it

in

Salon there go terra terra love I don't

know what's got into you lately you're a

real

misery I like being a misery oh come on

Albert there's something getting you

down now isn't there yes well what is it

you me yes R's nagging me I'm not yes

you are I'm not you're nagging me now oh

give up you know I thought that when you

retired it would be nice for us more

time for us to do things together but

you don't want to do anything you're

wasting your

life it's my

life what's left of it look why don't

you go and tidy yourself up a bit why

are we expecting company yes you haven't

asked old Foster and his Miss round have

you no oh thank God for that I can't

stand them and that mustache Mr Foster

hasn't got a mustache no but she has

don't exaggerate anyway you remember me

telling you about having a new Vicor oh

no not a vicer oh yes he's a very nice

man and he's starting up an over 60s

Club in the church Hall I thought you

might like to join well you saw wrong

Albert Albert where are you going out

before holy Joe gets

here good morning Mrs k

good morning it was we were um just

talking about you weren't we Albert

yes uh sit down Vicor

oh thank

you

Albert well Mr ker we haven't seen you

in church yet that's because I haven't

been oh he hasn't been too well oh well

I don't have to go to church to pray you

know

I can pray just as well lying in bed

that's perfectly true do you pardon pray

while lying in

bed no no I mean uh I could have I

wanted

to I'll just slip out hey where you

going there are a couple of things I

need from the shops I'll leave you two

to have a

chat Charming

lady my my name's Brian by the way oh

yes and what's yours well you know mine

Mr Coler there no need to be so formal

what's what's your Christian name Albert

do they call you Bert my friends do you

can call me

Albert

see uh your wife tells me that you've

recently retired yeah that's right I

expect after leading a fuller life you

find this new inactivity here rather

boring no no no I've got um plenty to

keep me occupied oh I was rather hoping

you'd care to join our over 60s Club no

as a matter of fact I don't really care

for that sort of thing well I'm I'm

sorry I've wasted your time it's been

very nice to have met you I I'll see you

out I'm not going

yet oh well it's very understandable you

feeling reluctant I mean most people do

until they come along and find out how

enjoyable it can be

we cater for a wide variety of interests

well I haven't got any interests oh I'm

sure you have what sort of things do you

like to do oh just usual know few pints

and a bit of slap and

tickle yes yes I'm terrible really it's

something something to do with me glands

I can't seem to get enough of beer in

women

really show youself be quite unsuitable

if you're over 60s Club

well I'm sorry to wasted your time nice

to met you and see you around eh no

Albert no no I don't believe a word

you've been saying I'm not going to go

until you agree to come along tonight I

can be just as stubborn as you you know

you can oh yes so you might just as well

say yes now I'll tell you what I'll make

a nice cup of tea you have a nice long

talk if you wish MH I'll just go and put

the kettle on can I help no no no no you

well you wait there won't be

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[Laughter]

long you've left him sitting

there serves him right yeah you're a

caution come on have that one on me oh T

haven't seen you around for a while well

I've mean a bit uh under the weather

lately a bit bit Brown off land oh well

it's nice to see you back tell you the

truth I thought you were

dead it's a CH beg isn't he come on

let's take the word of a pat hey I can't

stay long we got a union meeting in half

an hour oh what is it this time less

work or more holidays they've offered us

a productivity bonus I wouldn't accept

that if I were you the rate you lot work

at goslings you'd never get it it's a

hard life not half as hard as doing

nothing

well why don't you join the over

60s I don't want to sounds all right to

me don't you bloody

join what have you got against it well

for a start it's full of people over

60 you're over 60 I don't feel over 60

perhaps the people who go there don't

feel over 60 whose side are you on

Norman I'm not on anybody's side I just

think you ought to have an interest

you've got all the time in the world now

to to do anything you want to ah sounds

marvelous doesn't it eh retirement

everyone's dream get up when you like go

where you like do what you like but it's

not like that doesn't work out like that

you can't go where you like do what you

like in a bloody pension you could

improve your brain there's nothing wrong

with my brain no I I I mean learn

something they have classes for retired

people nowadays you could learn a

language French French could come in

useful around here i' be better off

learning

Pakistani no no no I I I'm too old to

start learning languages Luke there must

have been something you wanted to do

when you were a young lad some ambition

or something I there was well you could

do it

now no I don't think I

could why not I wanted to be a brain ser

vir I don't think they do classes for

that is it your

shout no anyway I haven't time I'll see

you tonight all right all right

John you want another one there b uh no

thanks no I'm cutting out alcohol

especially at dinner time oh I was going

to buy you one oh same

again Twisted you around did I well you

know you only live once quick Albert

quick work your E's looking for you and

she's in a very nasty temper do she know

I'm in here well she's got a good idea

she'll be in in a minute he you better

hide quick get in there that's a ladies

this is no time for modesty get in I

can't all right where is he who you know

who oh Albert he's not here then why did

you run in here when I asked you had you

seen it

I forgot something forgot what I don't

know I've forgotten he's got a shocking

memory

oh I think I'll be

off there's a man in there hi it's uh

it's the plumber he's come to fix the

bullcock he didn't look like a plumber

I've got a good idea who he did look

like all right J you can come out now

hello don't you eloel me what do you

mean by walking out on the Vicor I never

invited him that's no excuse yes it is

come on home what for never mind what

for come on home look at don't you talk

to me like that are you coming home or

not no

right oh you've done it now BT not

Before Time a man must be mastering his

own house well all the same I wouldn't

like to be in your house when you get

home oh she'll be all right she'll calm

down you've got to let them knows boss

that's what I owe the Milkman are you

sure you're doing the right thing

positive but what shall I tell Mr colia

tell him I've gone to stay with our

David in Hanley and I'm not coming back

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of course it's all topless now really

David thought it was wonderful tell I

took my top off typical he didn't mind

staring at all the be boobs he could see

but he didn't like anybody else staring

at mine well I don't think I'd like to

expose myself not in front of a lot of

foreigners When in Rome I thought you

went to mayorca just a b of speech dear

oh I wonder who that

is oh no it's David's mother I thought

she lived in STO she does I wonder what

she's doing here going back soon I

hope anybody

in hello mother I was beginning to think

you'd moved shall I leave M case here

case yes and if I were you i' changed me

window cleaner he's not doing the

corners I didn't know you'd got company

uh this is Gwen my next door neighbor

nice to meet you Mrs Kia Sheila's told

me so much about you she always did talk

too

much yes well I I think I'd better be

going I'll let myself out Sheila goodbye

Mrs Kia T bit ly D isn't she she just

happens to speak proper English oh I

know the sort all Persian lamb and no

knickers

oh Sher all right for them the T mother

what are you doing here is everything

all right I've left him left who who do

you think the Duke of

edor have you had a difference of

opinion no we've had a flaming

R long do you think you'll be scaring oh

well of course if I'm in the way I

didn't say you're in the way sit down

down look I don't know what's happened

between you and Dad but it can't be so

serious as to make you leave him after

all these years it is to me is it

another woman at his age you must be

joking he hasn't got the strength to

think about it let alone do it well

whatever it is why don't you just go

back and make it up oh no he started it

if there's any making up to be done it's

up to him to do it she started it she

must finish it you're a St and beggar

all right so's this flaming sink it's

your fault emptying the teapot down

there I always put the tea leaves down

the sink tea leaves yes not tea bags oh

we should have proper

tea I don't know how you got them down

the plug

off wasn't easy had to push them you

know what the trouble is don't you what

they've not gone around the bend that's

more than I can say for you when like

you I'll shove you on the Flaming

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sink morning messes don't be cheeky

sorry what is it Bo Scouts I don't want

anything thanks I've course see there's

anything you want do we oh Bobba job is

it he Bobba job I give you Bob you do a

job what's a

bob you teach him nothing these days you

mean means 5 P 5 P I usually get a pound

an hour pound an hour for doing a job

yeah right are you going to give me

something to do then no going around to

do a few myself I think you've got a

slate loose here off I give you a sck

chicken pound an hour it's inflation

infl down right

rubbery he back again clear off your

gasping devil

I didn't know it was you obviously well

if you're looking for the wife she's not

here I'm aware of that I understand

she's left you oh word gets about

doesn't it a is it on news at 10:

tonight there's not much in the Paris

goes on that I don't get to hear about I

wondered if I could help well you

can come on no one is going to have a

f please albertt don't let Pride come

between you and your wife look the only

thing that's come between me and my wife

up to the moment is you I'm sorry you

feel like that I only want to help in

any way I can surely there's something I

can do oh well uh now you mentioned

there is um there is something you can

do yes you can unblock that flaming

sink shall I salt the potatoes no thank

thank you well I always salt my potatoes

well I don't we prefer to put our salt

on them when they're served what's for

Pudding we don't have pudding no pudding

you can't expect my David to come home

after A Hard Day's work and not have any

pudding we usually have cheese well

that's for mice not grown men what time

will David be back he should be home any

minute how was MAA Maya was nice

come home

darling I want a word with you I only

stop for one gin and tonic your mother's

here oh no what the hell did hello

mother so nice to see you what a

surprise come on in let me look at

you oh you've lost weight he looks

better for it he looks underfed to me

now now you too

some it smells good what's for dinner

lamb chops boiled potatoes and beans but

there's no

pudding oh well uh where's Dad oh less

said about him the better what she's

left him what she's staying here what

your needle stuck will you excuse us a

minute mother I'd like to speak to David

in the other room oh you stay where you

are if you want to talk about me behind

my back I'll go into the

kitchen who what what's all this about

they've had a row or something the

important thing is she can't stay here

why not you know we don't get on she's

already trying to run the house oh she

doesn't mean any harm well she's got to

stay somewhere until we sort it out well

if she interferes once more either she

goes or I do she won't interfere I

promise

you the chops are done I've strained the

beans and I've salted the potatoes

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is he all

right I mean he's very quiet for a man

whose wife's left

him I'd be over the moon if my M left

me it's gone very

morling I think it's your

beer I'm a Fool to myself no you're not

Mr col yes I am I'm a piging

stupid old man well I wouldn't say you

were

stupid cigarette Albert no no thanks oh

uh another drink no no thanks I've had

enough we'll have to be going in a

minute Norman I've got a casserole on

why don't you come around and have a

bite to eat with us no no I'm not not

hungry oh perhaps we'll see you later

then yes

perhaps s

it wasn't all my fault

sorry pardon you talking to me no no no

I was I was talking to

myself

oh I mean a man must be mastering his

own house

pardon

he sorry you talking to yourself again

oh I mean uh what would you

do you talking to me now yes what would

you do well for a start I'd stop talking

to

myself I mean would you join the over 60

club I wouldn't there you are then I'm

only 45

still

out I shouldn't have left him who the

Vicor this this is our first Big

R

really we've been together now for 40

years I'm

say and we just as much in love now as

we were

then oh well leads to his own I suppose

I mean I shouldn't let a thing like this

come between

us I'm going to

apologize yeah that was I do going to

apologize as a matter of fact I wasn't

much looking forward to sleeping on me

own there's no reply he must be out yes

but out where he's not next door and

he's not at the rifleman's perhaps he's

had an accident he could have fallen

downstairs now don't get yourself all

worked up mother he could be lying there

with his legs broken oh I must go back

to him I should never have left him he's

hopeless on his own oh David you don't

understand come on I'll drive you home

oh thank you love

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what up hello Albert I went to bring you

back I'd already

come we've uh got a lot in common

haven't we well I should hope so after

all these years I'm sorry I so am I no

no it was my fault oh well let's say no

more about it we're together again now

and that's all that matters all you know

about that um business of the over 6 is

uh I've been thinking you know I might

um might give it a try I thought perhaps

we' probably slip out tonight oh you

don't have to do that I've invited them

all

here every time I look at

you I'm so glad that you're the

one I've been growing closer

to as the years of come and

gone sharing for good or

ill hardly a day

aart older out side but still young at

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