02x15 - Top Secret

[bunniefuu]

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Ted hi there I was just uh I'm just

gonna go put these golf clubs in the car

and then I was going to come back in and

fix that broken blender just like I

promised uh-huh hey hey hey honey you

you don't think I was trying to sneak

off to the golf course do you you

couldn't sneak off if you wanted to oh I

think I could if I really wanted to oh

no you could oh oh no you couldn't

what do you have to say about that my

shorts are k*lling me dismount Gary that

stinks hey maybe I don't do it so well

but you should see my dad she was a

gymnast in the Olympics no kidding

that's nothing my dad's a test pilot he

flies those new hot jets really Norman

yeah and even took me for a ride one

well

Ted's pilots are cool but they don't get

medals for saving people from burning

buildings like my dad did he's a fireman

you never told me that Reggie I don't

like to brag unless y'all occasion

demands it

hey Jamie what is your dad do my dad

well he works with computers oh he's

just a button-pusher hey how'd you like

your button pushed lay off him guys

his dad's okay for a button-pusher

[Laughter]

period is a meeting for men that's my

kind of meeting guys want to see my new

pet turtle no he's a racing turtle

he doesn't look too speedy to me yeah

who does he race against one that gets

nails he's kneeling at the starting line

there's the finish line now watch

okay speedy

[Laughter]

Oh No thinking about it Dada your

blender is fixed thanks honey

now I can go to the golf course only it

works oh ye of so little faith traitor

you're supposed to work till I get out

of the house to the repair shop in the

first place

more money I mean I'll take another stab

at it I think you've stabbed it enough

come on maybe you can help me collect

the laundry hi dad dad have you ever

flown in a fighter jet you kiddin Jame I

got to take an airsick bag when I get up

in a ladder from a burning building no

but I once rescued a bagel from a

burning toaster I'm serious didn't you

ever want to be more than just a button

pusher a button pusher what gave you

that idea well the guys were bragging

about their dads and the exciting jobs

they had and I told him what you did

they said you were just a button pusher

well that's just not true Jamie I have a

very exciting job yeah well I invented

Viki yeah but I can't tell the guys

about her well Jamie I have a very

important job at united robotronic s' in

fact just last week I solved a problem

that nobody else could lick yeah it's a

new way for a robotic arm to screw on a

jar lid yeah Jamie

this could revolutionize the jam and

jelly industry what do you think about

that I think it's a good thing I know

how to fight Jamie Jamie wait wait come

back listen I'm gonna tell you something

that I'm doing at work that is really

exciting and I know I know that I can

trust you

sure what is it do you know what this is

a blender Jamie that's just what it

looks like this is actually a secret

component that fits right into a space

rocket engine wow that's unbelievable

it sure is

no no no Jamie whatever you do don't

ever touch puree loose lips sink ships

loose lips sink ships Jamie you can't

let anybody worm this out of you project

blender is top secret strictly hush-hush

got it got it t*rture and stuck bamboo

shoots under the fingernails well Jamie

I hardly think they do that to you

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project blender well come on honey I had

to tell him something I mean all of his

friends were bragging about what

exciting jobs their fathers had and so I

stretched the truth a little bit

stretched it you chopped it sliced it

diced it and pureed maybe your shoelaces

are tied together see you son of button

pusher what I happen to know something

that my dad's doing that's more

important than anything your dad's ever

did that's a crock well he is then

what's he doing I can't tell you it's

top secret

sure I'm telling you the truth

right Vicki right Jamie can't breathe a

word about Project Blender it's strictly

hush-hush

what's project blender DNA making

t*rture means stick bamboo shoots under

my fingernails but I'll never tell it

fits into a space rocket engine

what you've done Vicky

King my dad never mentioned project

blender and he's your dad's boss maybe

it's so top secret see your dad doesn't

even know about it

yeah I guess they haven't told him

because my dad's a blabbermouth he's not

any worse than Vicki Oh Phil you are

hurry

well it's time to go for your singing

lesson how else are you going to learn

to whine and be minor daddy how come you

never told me about froderick blender

you know how I love does your secrets

Mike and spread them around my chick let

what do you you're talking about not

earth space it's a secret project

Jamie's two aspirins nodded your plan

how could they give us in a secret

project and not tell me I'm his boss

isn't fair

we're whining and be minor I will get to

the bottom of project blender even if I

have to be devious and deceptive just be

yourself

right keep it up kid you'll have turtle

soup for dinner Ted what about fixing

the blender before it blasts off into

space yeah I'll make a few margaritas in

it we can all blast off into space

there's something I'd better tell you

what's that Jamie Reggie and the guys

found out about project slender so did

Harriet I see and just how did this

breakdown and security happen they

weren't it out of me dad you invented

the robot and taught it how to talk but

you never taught it when to shut up

[Laughter]

come on loose lips hey this is really

getting out of hand you've got to tell

Jamie the truth yeah yeah honey I guess

you're right

poor kid fixing leaked out a national

security secret

yeah usually those leaks come out of the

Pentagon

I was just gonna knock when I I saw my

shoelace was untied

he's Brandon I've never seen you looking

better what can I do for you well I hope

this isn't gonna sound too silly uh the

fact of the matter is all day long I've

been dying for a milkshake what Brandon

if I thought a milkshake could do it I

gladly make you one right well as I was

saying I'm really desperate for one

could I borrow your blender our blender

Thanks I know our our blender is broken

oh I'll fix it oh no no no I I wouldn't

want to take advantage of you wait

all right I'll level with you Harriet

told you this blender was part of a

top-secret space project right right and

I'm your boss why wasn't I told about

this project why because it's not true I

knew that to fall for a story like that

yeah I can but Brandon you don't have to

worry about it I made the whole thing up

how do that to tell you the truth I hate

milkshakes they give me gas I knew that

I guess I better be going

so long pal yes sir so long farewell how

do you think I'm some kind of a jerk

what a jerk see Vicki these are pictures

of Mars

thanks to inventors like my dad someday

we'll be able to walk on Mars and meet

Martian creatures what does a Martian

creature look like that's what a Martian

creature looks like speedy any trick

come on I'll show you

watch Hospital Harriet she's like kind

of a sheltered life

well see Vicki there's life and there's

death

wait I'll show you

see that's my movie

[Laughter]

[Laughter]

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[Applause]

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we'll get you another one

[Applause]

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girl I had a pet canary named tweet

tweeted and she died too but we gave

tweet tweet the best funeral ever

lots of balloons and decorations no

decorations and ice cream and cake oh

and a tide you want whipped cream and

nuts and cherries that and we'll even

have presents presents it'll be like a

great big party yes

[Applause]

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vacuums c*ck out oh don't worry about

it honey we'll send it into space with

the blender

oh no I'll do that right now give me a

minute come on Vicky why don't we go

make dinner

you always say why don't we make dinner

and I end up making it while you watch

but Vicky you see robots are supposed to

do all the work so it makes life easier

for the humans that's a crock looks like

everyday she's becoming more human hi

dad yeah Jamie can I talk to you for a

minute sure what about well it's uh it's

about project blender what about it more

secrets no Jamie the only thing that

blender is ever gonna do is blend good

thinking that should really confuse the

Russians no no Jamie what I mean is the

only way that blender is ever gonna go

into outer space is if the astronauts

want margaritas I mean milkshakes what

do you mean what I mean is I was a

little loose with my lips today I I

didn't tell you the truth why not well

because your friends teased you and

embarrassed you about my job and well

every father wants his son to be proud

of him I just needed someone to get the

guys off my case no but then you forgive

me huh sure I love you for better or for

worse even if this wasn't one of your

better days well thanks cuz I feel

really stupid about this yeah me too

how could I have ever been so gullible

what a whopper

come on let's help Mom with dinner yeah

I need to personally now well could you

talk a little faster honey Ola I think

this this our vacuum and the blender

into the repair shop in the morning in

where is the blender I don't know you

had it last I should have known hi what

are you doing with our blender Brandon

well I thought I'd fix it for you old

Ted such a klutz little surprise yeah

sure you did after making sure it wasn't

for a project blender and outer space I

told you it was and how can I believe

you you told me the truth well you can

bet on one thing I'm gonna keep my mouth

shut about my real secret project - what

secret project no not forget it forget

it

well as long as I mentioned it and now

that I know I can trust you you can you

can This Is It this is what project

clean sweep

it's like an ordinary vacuum cleaner to

me haha you see that's the beauty of it

Brandon this baby I'll be fully

operational as soon as I can solve one

little problem with the suction motor

hey I fixed your blender right I bet I

can fix this too here we go come on Sean

plug this in it doesn't work come on

turn it on what's the problem

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