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01x12 - The Kitty Kat Kaper - The Colossal Crime of Commodore Peril

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "The Plastic Man Comedy/Adventure Show". Aired: September 22, 1979 – February 28, 1981.*
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Plastic Man, his girlfriend Penny, and his Polynesian sidekick Hula-Hula travel the world and are given their assignments from the Chief to stop any threat to the world.

01x12 - The Kitty Kat Kaper - The Colossal Crime of Commodore Peril

Post by bunniefuu »

From out of the pages of DC Comics comes

the world's newest and greatest

superhero, Plastic Man. He can

spring, he can stretch,

he can fly, he can bounce,

he can change his shape,

and he can even dance.

Each week, Plastic Man will face the

world's greatest. greatest collection of

villains.

There's action. There's

comedy.

There's danger.

There's penny. There's bad

luck cooler.

There's plenty for everybody on the

Plastic Man Comedy Adventure Show.

Eat your heart out, Amen.

Hey, boss, the governor's getting ready

to leave. We told him we'd bring his car

to the side entrance so he could avoid

the crowds. Good. You know what to do

next. Right.

Now it's time for Miss Kitty Cat to do

her work.

Here you are, Governor. Thank you.

What?

Scat

No! Please! No!

Come on, Governor, into your new mansion.

A beautiful specimen. Put him in the

animal compound with the others. Right,

boss. Soon

the whole world will be at my feet.

International authorities will be

helpless to learn where their pets.

Celebrities have vanished, and little

Kitty Cat shall be able to demand

anything for their return.

Gosh, Class, you certainly know the best

places to take a girl. I got to admit,

you can't go wrong at Serena's Super

Sundae Shop. Class, they forgot to bring

you a straw. No problem.

Who could ask for more?

I think I know someone who's going to ask

for more. You're right, Plastic Man. And

for practically the first time. Gosh,

Chief, I've been right before. Remember

July 1960?August 1960.

Oh yeah. I have an assignment for you. A

series of famous people has mysteriously

disappeared from major cities around the

world. The only thing we know is that

each time the Kitty Cat circus has played

the same town. Where's the next place the

circus plays?Cleveland. Go. there and get

jobs with the circus. See what you can

find out. I'll be in touch.

Gee, I guess we'll have to finish lunch

later. Okay, Penny, take us to Cleveland.

Right!

As you can see, Ms. Kitty Cat, I am

Plasmo the Great, the world's foremost

aerial contortionist.

Aerial contortionist?An odd

specialization. I presume those, too, are

your assistants?Oh, they work as clowns.

A touch of humor for the act. Very well.

You may begin with tonight's performance.

You will work over the wild animal act.

Wild animal act?A group of ferocious

animals gathered at great expense from

all over the world.

You will work above them simultaneously.

Simultaneously?Ohh We look forward to the

performance. Good. The show begins

at eight. See you under the big top.

Plasmo the Great.

Does that fool think I don't know Plastic

Man when I see him?Tonight, our wild

animals dine on delicacies.

Ladies and gentlemen, tonight

Kitty Cat's famous International Circus

is proud to present the Great

Plasmo. With the help of his two

assistants, the Great Plasmo will attempt

feats of aerial contortion while

suspended without a net over a cage of

wild and ferocious animals. I guess

that's my cue.

That was close.

Come on, guys, hop aboard! Do we have to

go through with this?Yes, Hoola. If we're

going to find out anything, we can't blow

our cover.

Plasmo the Great's last performance and

the end of Plastic Man.

Players! Leaf and lava. Something's

wrong.

Quick, slide down.

Made it safe and sound. Look

again.

Oh, no. We slid out of the frying pan.

Into the lion's den. Moldy

macadamias. Let's get out of here.

Just our luck. More hula hula's bad

luck.

It's time to extend myself.

That way, class.

Something tells me someone's trying to

get rid of us. Gee,

boss, I'm sorry things didn't work out.

Yeah, who'd ever expect the guy to turn

himself into a cage?Never mind. I have

a new plan for Plastic Man, something

very special. We're with you, boss.

First, we've got business tonight. Let's

roll.

Well, that's the last of them. Have you

noticed anything odd about the animals in

this circus penny?What do you mean?

They're all cats. Lions, tigers,

leopards, panthers. You're right.

No elephants, no horses?Not even a

monkey. I wonder why.

Class, Miss Kitty Cat's driving

away, going like 60. We better

find out what she's up to.

Everything went according to plan. Not

quite, boys, we're being followed. What?

Looks like that plastic man is two pals.

Lose-a-lot, fast.

They're on to us. Push the horsepower,

Penny. You got it, Plas.

They're gonna lose us, Plas. They must

have jet power in that thing. Well, we've

got plastic power.

Out of way, Plas. We're catching them.

They're gaining on us again, boss. Never

mind. I know where to lose them.

They're right on our tail, boss. Turn not

now.

Gosh, class, which way do you think they

went?To the right, the left, or the

middle?Boy, a guy could get confused

figuring this out. To the right, Plaz.

I've got one of my famous lucky

hunches. OK, Penny, let's move.

Did anyone see what that sign said back

there?I think it said Danger Bridge.

You know, Hula Hula, I think you just had

another one of your unlucky hunches. Me

too. Oh, what do we do now?

We can't go back to the circus, players.

Well, as soon as I get us out of this

mess, we'll go back to the hotel. We can

think up a new plan in the morning.

Besides, we're still paid up for the

night.

Wow! I know Plastic Man will have some

kind of plan to keep us from carrying out

our next mission. We've got to find out

what that plan is. Oh, boss.

This is a powerful micro-dot radio

transmitter. It will transmit any

conversation thousands of miles. Wow!

You two will have to find Plastic Man and

plant this device on him tonight. You can

count on us, boss.

It's all over the papers. Another

celebrity vanished last night. And we

know Kitty cats behind it. But how does

she do it, Hula Hula?That's what we've

got to find out. I

think somebody else is about to tell me

the same thing. Plastic Man, you've got

to find out how all these people keep

disappearing without a trace. Right,

Chief. We've got a good lead on it

already. I hope so, because the circus is

going to Istanbul tomorrow. We have

information. Mr. Pierre, the world's

foremost art authority, will be touring

the Topcoffee Museum there. We're certain

he's the next target. It's your

assignment to prevent, repeat,

prevent his disappearance. I'll have a

plan, Chief. See that you do.

You heard the Chief. Next stop,

Istanbul.

You have a plan yet, class?You better

believe it, Penny. I'm gonna disguise

myself as Mr. Pierre's coat. I'll

catch that kitty cat red-handed. So

that's it. Well, I'll have a plan of my

own, and this time we'll finish off

Plastic Man for good.

You make a great coat, class. How do I

fit, Mr. Pierre?Most comfortably, thank

you. Good. Don't worry about anything.

You're perfectly safe as long as I'm on

you. What do you want us to do, players?

Stay here out of sight, Penny. My plan

will only work if they think Mr. Pierre

is alone. Hey, here comes Mr. Pierre with

Mr. Plastic coat. Remember, the boss said

to act scared.

Catch you, Pierre. That's what you think.

It's him, Plastic Man!

Let's get out of here!

Yo!Surprise?No, Kitty

Cat. I suspected it was you all along.

And this time, thanks to me, you failed

to get your victim. Not quite, plastic

fool. You see, it was you I wanted, not

Mr. Pierre. So I lured you here.

And now I've got you.

What?What's happening?I

don't...

And so, plastic man, your plastic powers

are at an end.

You know, Plastic Man, I think I shall

make you my personal pet. The world can

have back the rest of their celebrities,

but you will always be mine. Wow!

Who's there?It's us, Art and Bot.

Yeah, we got something for you. Well,

what have we here?We found him sneaking

around the circus. We weren't sneaking.

We were looking for Plastic, and... I

mean, Plasmo the Great. We can't find him

anywhere. Really?How

surprising. My little ocelot seems to

like you. It's

almost like he's trying to tell me

something. Isn't it?Well, I'm

sorry, I can't help you find your friend.

Hey! After him, you fools! You know that

ocelot is special. I want him back at all

costs. You two, get out and stay out.

Leap and lava?We still don't know where

Plaza is. Now what do we do?Now

we find out what's so special about that

ocelot. Come on.

Which way did he go?Try this way.

Wait a minute. What's the matter?If you

were a cat, right here. Where would you

hide?The pipe. Right.

It's dark in here. It's tight, too.

I think we're almost through. Watch out

for that sharp curve. What happened?

I didn't watch out. I'm stuck. Grab my

feet!Maybe I can pull you through.

Thanks. He's gotta be around here

someplace. We've looked everywhere else.

Hey, let's try the paint shop.

Hold it.

All right, you pesky pet, you go back to

the boss. Oh, at

last, the end of the pipe.

And look, it leads right to the paint

shop. Come on, let's check it out. Boy,

I'll never travel by pipe again.

Hula hula, look. It's a

message. Help, kitty holding me

prisoner as Ocelot. It's signed

last. Being held prisoner is an

ocelot. That's why it was so special. You

mean that cat was really Plastic Man?

But how?I don't know. I only know we

better find out quick.

We better not get caught this time. Let's

take a look. That was very

naughty of you to run away, Plastic Man.

Oh, now I'll just have to

keep you caged up. I suppose you're

wondering how it's all done. It's quite

simple, really. I discovered the

secret of this magic potion in an ancient

book of Egyptian lore. One sip,

and I can turn myself or

anyone into a cat and back

again. So that's how she does it.

We've got to get that potion and change

Class back, Hula Hula. But how?We can't

just walk in there. Let's climb up on the

roof. Maybe there's an air vent we can

get down. The only problem is I lose

my powers over a period of time. I must

mix up a new batch of the potion before

nightfall. Where are you?A clothes

closet. I'll be right down.

Oh, about those disappearing people.

I have them all, but you'll never

find them.

Don't go away, Pussycat. I'll be right

back. All clear. Come on. Don't worry,

Plaz. We'll have you back to your old

self in no time. And I'll use this to

do it. Only a drop left. I hope it's

enough.

Thanks, guys. Well,

I guess there wasn't enough potion to

give him back his full strength. Oh, it

may take a while. Holy hula

hips! Here come those two guys in the

service. Quick, roll him up like a rug.

We'll carry him back to the plane.

Hey, hold it! Where do you think you're

going?Ohh Miss Kitty can't ask us to have

the rug cleaned. Whoa!Well, see that they

do a good job. Oh, you bet. The boss

always liked things clean.

I'm glad to see you back to normal,

plastic man. Thanks, Chief. That kitty

cat almost put an end to my plastic

career. Who would have guessed she could

turn her victims into wild animals?Well,

you certainly found out the hard way.

Now, listen. The circus is giving its

final performance today at the Maharaja

of Puchar's palace in India. Now, that

must mean Kitty's planning her biggest

disappearing act. Right. See that it

doesn't happen.

There's the palace, but where's the

circus?Inside, Hula Hula. Kitty

Cat's giving a command performance just

for the Maharaja. Come on, let's move.

well That must be the Maharaja. Your

Highness, today we are going to give you

a performance you'll never forget. Wrong,

Kitty Cat. A performance you'll never

forget. Plastic Man. Right. And

now it's your turn to disappear right

into jail. Not quite, you plastic

pest. I still have my powers.

Yes me, Kitty Cat.

Penny, Hula Hula! I'll take care of the

cat lady. You take care of her two

friends. And I know just how to do it.

Hey, you two ugly guys in the derby!

Let's get 'em!

Quick, up the ladder! I get 'em. Ah,

we got 'em. Now?Now

Got 'em!Now all Class has to do is get

Kitty Cat! Missed! But there's

more than one way to catch a cat!

Gotcha, Cat Lady!

Class, she's moving away! Not yet!

She still hasn't heard from the plastic

cannonball!

Okay, guys, fire away!

Gotcha. She's trying to ZAP me

again.

I've lost my powers. And

so Ms. Kitty Cat is caught.

Well, that's the last of them, Penny.

You've turned them all back to normal.

Plastic Man, on behalf of all of us, I

wish to express my thanks and... No

thanks expected, Governor. Just doing our

job. I understand. Goodbye.

Goodbye. Well, mission accomplished.

Thank goodness. That was the last of the

potion. yeah What's the matter, Penny?

I... I hiccup. I think it's

the potion.

My hiccup turned Hula Hula into a kitten!

With the potion wearing off, I hope you

have enough power to turn him back.

Otherwise, we're gonna have to lead him

around on a leash and feed him a bowl of

milk every day.

I'll try.

Hey, that stuff about the bowl of milk,

that wasn't funny. I was only kidding,

Ola Ola, but you were awful cute as a

kitten.

The SS Mammon is nearly insight.

Excellent, Mr. Snow. Then I shall proceed

to destroy it, exactly as I promised

I would. In a few moments, the SS

Mammon, most up-to-date sea vessel ever

built in the vast shipyards of

billionaire Plato Parnassus, will be

resting on the ocean floor.

A totally useless wretch.

Plus, you don't really think this

mysterious Commodore parable dare strike

today, do you?I don't know, Penny, but

he's vowed to destroy the SS Mammon

because Plato Parnassus refused to pay

him $1,000,000 cash. Yeah, and the

chief must believe his threat. Why else

would she make us delay our vacation till

the ship is safely launched? Huh?

Plus, down in the water, it's no,

no, Hula Hula. The ship we're guarding is

the other way, not this way. You see,

Hula Hula?I think just a submarine

launching a drilled torpedo. You see

things like that every just a submarine

launching a drilled torpedo. What do

we do, class? Why, I'm disappointed in

you, Penny. Don't you know that one good

torpedo

deserves another?

I just hope he can catch it in time.

It's going too fast for anybody to stop,

but at least I can change its direction a

bit. I just hope I changed it enough.

I did. The damage to the docks can be

easily repaired.

All right, Commodore Peril, here comes

Plastic Man. You'll never get away

from me. Did you hear that, Commodore

Sir? Stop sniveling, you squeamish little

snow cone. I simply press this

single button and...

Well, maybe he'll get away just this

once. I'll never be able to pick up his

trail through all the ink he squirted.

He got away, huh, Plus? That's a terrible

thing to say, Hula Hula. What really

happened, players? He got away.

Oh, hi, Chief. Don't oh, hi, Chief me.

I saw everything that happened. I

want you to proceed to Commodore Peril's

second target, the private castle of the

famous communications magnate William

Gandalf Scott. Right, Chief, we'll get

him this time.

Don't worry, Mr. Scott. Plastic Man and

his loyal companions are on the job. Why,

I certainly feel better. But he seems to

strike from nowhere, doesn't he? Yes, but

this time I intend to make certain he

doesn't sneak up on us.

There's nothing in sight except that

single grey cloud. And if it rains, I can

always turn into an umbrella. I guess

we've scared Commodore Peril away. Look,

Commodore, sir. It's Plastic Man.

The fool. Since William Gandalf Scott

refused to pay me the million dollars I

demanded, I shall now

destroy his most

prized possession, Great

Scott Castle.

Attention, plastic man. This is Commodore

Peril. I warn you, keep

your rubberized nose out of my

business or suffer the consequences.

If you want to destroy Great Scott

Castle, you'll have to destroy me first.

My pleasure.

Well. You don't have to enjoy it so much.

Now watch as my lightning ray

destroys Scott Castle.

A lightning ray? I've got to stop it.

This lightning rod shake ought to do the

trick, I hope.

Who turned on the lights?Are you OK,

Plass? That only hurts when I laugh,

Penny, which I may never do again. Now to

deal with Commodore Peril for once and

for all. No, Plass-like man. We'll fight

no w*r today. But we shall meet

again if the third and final billionaire

refuses to meet my

terms. Till then,

farewell.

You failed twice, Plastic Man.

I'm taking you off the Commodore Peril

caper as of now. Oh, come on,

Chief. Don't be a sore loser. All right,

one more chance. But nothing had better

happen to the final billionaire that

Commodore Peril has threatened, Howard

Huge. It won't, Chief. I have a

plan. And so, refusing

Plastic Man's protection, billionaire

Howard Huge has agreed to pay the $1

million demanded by the mysterious

supervillain known only as Commodore

Peril. Huge has agreed to deliver the

ransom in cash and in person in the

middle of the city sports stadium. Do you

think it's a trick, Commodore? Of course

it's a trick, Mr. Snow. But Commodore

Peril is ready to turn the tables on

that elastic eagle. After

today, there will be. No more,

Plastic Man.

I don't know about this, Plastic Man.

Are you certain your plan will work?

Don't worry, Mr. Huge. Commodore Peril

may be a nasty customer, but Plastic Man

isn't exactly chopped lever either.

There's a stadium, players.

Good luck!

I sure hope Plaza's scheme works. Oh,

it's got to, Lula. Uh,

Plastic Man has played right

into my hands. This time, this

will be the last trick he'll ever play on

anyone.

Where am I? Don't worry about that, Mr.

Huge. Mr. Snow, the

suitcase, if you will.

Good. Now send it on a trip

into outer space.

Goodbye forever, Plastic

Man. Did

you really think, Plastic Man, that you

could fool me by disguising yourself as

the suitcase containing the million

dollars? Now you'll be orbiting

the Earth forever, so I guess I'll be

seeing youAround and around

and around. I don't know, Commodore. I

really don't think we'll be traveling in

the same circles since you'll be in a

jail cell. You put. A

suitcase. I shot it into orbit.

Really was a suitcase, painted red,

yellow, and black. I knew you'd be ready

for me, so I was ready for you being

ready for me, if you follow me. Even

turning into a lightning rod won't help

you against my laser beam,

plastic man.

Oh, no. When it strikes the ship--

Leapin' lava, look. The paraplane's

falling. Something's gone wrong. Oh,

dear me. Don't worry, you

two. We'll get it.

Una, Una, hit Magnetizer, now!

She's hit, Penny.

We've landed. Now's my chance to escape.

Fortunately, I've had my special peril

mobile standing by.

Perhaps I didn't succeed in making

myself rich, but at least I

escaped to fight another day.

And if at first you don't

succeed, then give up.

Plastic Man, here, but

where?You were expecting maybe Parnelli

Jones? And now nest up the county

jail.

Oh, that was a wonderful blast. I'm

sure the Chief will be pleased. Now we

can finally start our vacation.

Oh, hi, Chief. Good news. We caught

Commodore Peril and de-periled him.

Well, plastic joke there. A little bad

joke, you mean. Oh, yes. Well, anyway,

now we can go on vacation. You've

definitely earned one, and you can start

on it immediately the minute you turn in

the million dollars Howard Hughes gave

you. Oh, that's easy, Chief. I gave it to

Hula Hula for safekeeping. Well, where is

the money, Hula Hula? Well, um,

actually, plus, you see?

You didn't. Well, I had to put the

million dollars someplace, didn't I? Oh,

well, at least we know where we'll be

spending this year's vacation, don't we,

g*ng?